


Sprinkling Green and Dark Blue

by ExiledQueenCatalog



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - High School, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Bullying, Drugs, Dry Humping, F/F, F/M, First Love, Fluff and Smut, Football | Soccer, Language, Lots of Weed, M/M, Praise Kink, Public Hand Jobs, Rimming, Smut, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:54:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 267,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25864708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ExiledQueenCatalog/pseuds/ExiledQueenCatalog
Summary: When Louis mother decides to move to Cheshire for love, he does not expect his concert hook-up, Harry, to stand in his mothers friends kitchen. Things get complicated when the Tomlinson family stays with Styles residence for two months.
Relationships: Ashton Irwin/Harry Styles, Eleanor Calder/Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Liam Payne/Danielle Peazer, Niall Horan/Barbara Palvin, Perrie Edwards/Jade Thirlwall, Perrie Edwards/Zayn Malik
Comments: 44
Kudos: 95





	1. Welcome to Cheshire

**Author's Note:**

> First of a disclaimer, this is a work of fiction and does not reflect real life. It is fanfiction after all! :)
> 
> This is my first fic so please be gentle.  
> Also English is not my first language so bare with me.
> 
> I hope you enjoy♡

“Welcome Home!”

His mother chuckles as she falls into the arms of her childhood friend. “I’m so thankful for this.” 

“Nonsense, I’m just returning the favour.” They both giggle and theatrically kiss each other’s cheek. 

“Let me introduce you to my daughters: Lottie, Fizzy. And my balls of joy; my lovely twins Daisy and Phoebe.” She proudly presents his half-sisters, “and my sweet boy Louis.” Louis gives a small nod and half a smile. But Anne runs forward arms spread wide, Louis quickly swivels and pushes Fizzy and Lottie into her arms, averting the crushing hug. He barely remembers her, Anne visited them a few times in Doncaster, where he was happy thank you very much, until his mother decided that she had to fall in love with her _third_ soul-mate. _Yeah, that’s why Louis can’t believe in that bullshit._

Anne loosens the embrace and walks them into the house towards the kitchen, “remember my firstborn? Gemma.” She points at a blonde haired girl with kind eyes and a sneering smirk. 

“Of course I do.” His mother, Jay, takes her into her arms. “You were in nappies last I saw you.” She pinches Gemma into her cheeks. Gemma was a year older than him, but his mother had moved to Doncaster when she met his real dad, who split when Louis was less than a week old. He barely remembers any of these people. 

Jay shifts her focus to the kitchen aisle, “this must be Harry.” Anne nods proudly. A mop of dark curls, barely contained underneath a dumb dark blue beanie, lifts up and granted its one of the most beautiful sights Louis has ever seen. Sharp bone structure, strong jawline and those lips. Puffy, plump and pink. And he _knows_ those lips. He has felt them, seen _how they stretched around my cock. The softness of those curls as I tugged on them._ A dorky smile spreads on those lips and _are those dimples? How do I not remember that?_ That’s when Louis notices that he has to stop staring at Curly’s lips and lift his eyes to his. The most glorious green, sprinkling with sudden excitement. _Fuck_ , Curly remembers him. Wide with astonishment and a blush rushing up his cheeks, his hand lifts, his lanky and dainty fingers wave awkwardly. _The way they watered up for me, green and precious, darkened by lust and pride. What a sight that was._ Louis lifts his eyebrow, while he lets his eyes rank over that delicious little body wrapped in a bright red apron with a ‘Kiss the Baker’ inscription. He scoffs and rolls his eyes, subconsciously he sees Curly’s eyes drop and those dimples disappear. He looks around the beige large kitchen, while he hears his mum telling Curly how she and Anne lost touch sometime in their 20s. 

“Would you mind showing me our rooms, so that I can lug the luggage up there?” 

Anne smiles brightly “of course, Louis.” She points at a man with a small head and a large stomach “Robin can help you if you want, Harry too.” _Oh not Curly._

“I got it, just need the layout.” He tries to smile, but he knows it’s a little crooked. Lottie rams her elbow into his side, as they get moving. Her eyes reminded him to be nice. 

“Your mother and Dan will stay downstairs.” Anne says as she and Louis walk up the small staircase, which is hidden within the kitchen as a small shortcut “the twins got the old painting room in the attic. Fizzy and Lottie have to share and you get your own right next to Harry’s.” She points at another door across from Harry’s “that’s the bathroom.” 

“We all share?” Lottie asks, having followed them, she obviously doesn’t trust Louis on his own. 

“This isn’t America darling,” Anne grins “you can all share with Gemma and Harry.” 

The next half-hour Louis is busy lugging all the thousand suitcases the women in his family have decided to bring up the stairs and run back down. This time he uses the big staircase, opposite of the main door, he feels eyes on him, every time he passes through the entrée and past the large open kitchen.Sweat is building at the bottom of his spine and he curses loudly at his sisters. How can there be 14 suitcases for a 2 month stay? 2 months stuck together in a house with Curly, his snarky sister and overbearing mum. _Great, this’ll be great._ Why did his mum have to choose to move in the middle of a school year? He’s stuck repeating a year, just so that his mother can move to Manchester to move into an unbuilt house with her new boyfriend, Dan.

He quickly changes into a new shirt and washes his torso with a towel in the shared bathroom. When he walks back downstairs the women are already clinking their glasses together for the third time, cheering on their friendship that had been on hiatus for the last 14 years or so. Louis didn’t really listen when his mum gushed over Anne Twist. He rolls his eyes again.

Dinner is quite boring, mostly because he doesn’t listen. He pushes the food around on his plate which is entirely too good to have been made by a teenager. Gemma tells him that she is in her last year of school and that she’s preparing to apply for Uni. Meanwhile, Curly looks awkwardly at him across the table, fidgeting with the hem of his green jumper. _I don’t remember him being this fidgety._ Then again they only shared five minutes with each other _._ During dessert, Lottie exclaims she’s excited to be in the same class as Harry. But Curly mumbles something about keeping her distance from him.

That night, Louis lies in his new bed, looking up at the fancy ceiling. It’s not just white, but it has swivels of flowers all over it. Louis scoffs, _just like Curly’s hair._ What a mess he has got himself into. He grabs his phone from the night stand, texting his best friend from home:

Stanley  👊

Oi you remember Curly from the script concert?

Crushing Curly? 

The kid that sucked ye off in the bog?

He’s me mum’s friends son!!

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Alirgh alright calm down

🤣

your so fucked

Cheers for the help

what ye need help for?

Just make deep dark love to him

His names Harry.

I’ll give you 40 quid if you shag him.

Fockoff.

🤣

Louis throws the phone away from himself and closes his eyes annoyed. He strokes himself leisurely over his pyjamas. _God, Curly did look beautiful on his knees._ Just as the boy in the adjacent room, he comes from the memory. Guilt puddles inside his stomach, twisting him up when he falls asleep in a cold large bed that is not his own.

💚🍑💙

Louis got the last shower in the morning, which is how he ended up closing the door of the bathroom dressed only in his towel as Harry opened his. His mouth stands enticingly open, his green eyes trail the loose water droplet that slides down his naked torso. Louis’ eyebrow raises accompanied by a sneer. Harry turns beet red. “Close your mouth Curly,” Louis taunts the blushing boy, “before someone puts something into it.” Curly fidgets with the hem of his shirt again, the green in his eyes dim _._

He whispers a “sorry.” Louis walks past him back to his room, a week “were going to be late is all” stops him. 

“Don’t worry about me, sweet curls.” _Sweet Curls, really?_ He closed the door before he could hear his answer. His room was still untouched, the bed was unmade (why should he make it every morning if you get back into it in a few hours?), he hasn’t bothered to unpack (c’mon it’s only 2 months) and he hasn’t bothered to pack for school. Which is why he is currently scrambling to get all his things together, meanwhile he grabs his uniform jacket. 

“Louis! You promised you’d try harder this time.” His mum scolded him as he arrived downstairs five minutes later. The girls were already putting away their porridge and cereal bowls.

“Yeah yeah,” Louis scratches back his fringe annoyed “talks too much, could be very bright, doesn’t meet potential. I should just ink it on me skin, then ye don’t have to repeat it again.” 

“Don’t be sassy with me,” she replied. “Get into the car, NOW!” 

Anne piped up, just as Louis exited the house “I can drive them Jay.” 

His mother came over to the car where Louis was lighting a cigarette. “Louis, I need you to try.” She says, pleading in her eyes. “Really try, please Boo. I need this to work.” Louis nodded, he didn’t like to see his mother in pain. Since he was a baby, it was always him and her. _You & I. _Embarrassingly enough she was his best friend and closest confidant and she did deserve this. She deserved to be happy, even if it is with Dan. 

Reluctantly he says “I got the last shower mum and I am on time.” 

She smiled and kissed his cheek, “promise you’ll make an effort in school today?” She asks as she pushes a banana and a water bottle into his hands. 

“Promise.” 

She poked his cheek, distracting him before grabbing his cigarette and throwing it away “stop smoking!” She scolds over her shoulder.

💚🍑💙

Louis never hated going to school, in fact he loved it. It was one big social to him, especially when he could fool around with Stan. A new school, however, was nerve-racking, even for a sassy popular mate like him. He stepped into his first class of the day: Economics and Management. It was something his mum really wanted him to do, plus arriving late to a school year made sure he got the worst of all classes. “Your late.” A voice boomed. 

Louis turned around to stare at the clock “Actually, I’m right on time.” 

“No your late to the school year, why?” Louis scanned the man, he looked boring, had a bit of a stomach and a weird buzz cut. 

“Me mother moved for love and work.” 

“Hmm… I hope you can catch up. I’m not slowing the class down for you. Mr. Tomlinson take a seat. Malik” Louis rolled his eyes as he made way to the last few rows on the class “at least pretend to help him catch up.” 

“I assure you, I’m a quick learner.” He sat down next to a black-haired kid, who was slumping in his seat, foot on the table, “is he always such a cunt?” 

The boy, who had looked annoyed at having someone sit next to him, grunted out a laugh “-fortunately.” Which was probably meant to mean unfortunately, his heavy Bradford accent swallowed the beginning of the word. They listened to the teacher going on and on about economic terms, the boys’ demeanour next to him lifted, shifting to a more comfortable silence between the two.

The teacher kept insisting that he knew better than all of them, proper grown up shit talk. Something was off with him though, Louis really didn’t like it. “Why is he such a cunt?” The girl in front of him turns around, she’s beautiful. Darkened skin, big round eyes, copper straight hair with a very small nose. She obviously didn’t want to talk to the new guy, but she was also a total tattle tale and unable to shut her mouth. 

“Rumour is that he used to be this manager for a boy band, he forced two of them into the closet. When they finally came out as a gay couple, his career was over. So he became a teacher.” She wiggles her eyebrows.

“They allowed him to do that?” The beauty shrugs. “So he is an ass.” 

She snorts, “Correct.” She seems to think on something until she says “I’m Jet.” 

“Jade, the accent is shit” the kid next to him whispers under his breath. 

He nods at her “Louis.” 

“Zayn” the kid next to him grumbles. 

“Tomlinson, would you care to explain to me why you’re being disrespectful on the first day?” 

“Just making friends… eh?… Sir?” 

“Make them on your own time, Tomlinson. You don’t want to spend your first day in detention right?“ 

“ ‘Course not.”

The teacher, he hadn’t bothered to learn the name off of his schedule, turned around to him, nostrils flaring. “Mr Tomlinson, Louis, is it? This…” 

“Lewis.” Louis interrupted, only his family called him Louis, his friends usually called him Lewis.

His teacher, however, didn’t seem to care and continued “is not the way to catch up, son.” With that pointed look of his teacher, it could have been the end of it, if Louis weren’t such a shit. 

“Don’t know what you’re talking about Sir. Thought I was doing an incredible job.” He lifted his hands and pretended to correct his collar in an attempt to look cool. A girl with brown hair in the first row grunted to stifle a laugh, while the boy next to her looked at her annoyed. _Not a team player then._

“Mr. Tomlinson let me assure you that this is the fastest way to detention. Now keep your mouth shut!” 

“Yes, Sir.” The teacher grumbled, “call me by my last name, don’t know what school you used to go to Mr. Tomlinson, but here we use last names.” 

“To be quite honest I don’t remember your name yet, so…?!” Louis waved his hands around. 

“DETENTION, Mr Tomlinson. Well done. On your first day boy. Now shut up and surrender to detention at the end of the day.” 

Louis groaned annoyed, “of course….” 

“Mr Cowell.” Zayn helped out under his breath. 

“… Mr Cowell.” 

When he turned around, Zayn smirked at him, “fooking legend already, aye Tommo.” Louis rolled his eyes but smirked, _making friends already, way to go._

The rest of class went by in a blur, and the next class was a horrible accumulation of numbers and a span of boringness over some kings and queens. Finally, during his first lunch break he was standing at the row of lockers, Zayn was explaining the locking system, when a girl with purple hair fell around Jade’s arms “hello ray of sunshine.” 

“Wooo” purple hair answered, wiggling her bum while still hugging Jade tightly. 

“Long time no see.” 

“We saw each other yesterday, you dumb cow.” Jade rolls her eyes, “Tommo this is Perrie.” 

“Hi.” She waves. Louis only nods. She falls into Zayn’s arms and gives him a big smooch on the lips. 

“Also my girlfriend.” Zayn explains once she has let him go. 

“Right, good to meet you.” 

“He’s cute where’d you find him?” 

“Economics, gave Cow-hell a real hard time.” 

“Bravo.” She gives him a clap on the shoulder in appreciation. 

“Got detention for it, don’t even know how I’m going to explain that one to me mum. Me first day!“ He exclaims through his hands up. Just thinking about his mum’s disappointed look hurts him. 

“Just tell her you’re with me, mate. Making new friends.” Zayn grins at him. 

“Sure.” That’ll make her happy, first day and already making friends, now the cow hopefully keeps his mouth shut about the incident. 

They sit down at a table in a corner of the cafeteria, they seem to be the cool kids of the junior year. Most students follow with their eyes as they walk over, it’s probably Zayn, that olive skin and the leather jacket. The others don’t seem to care or notice. But Jade gives him an amused look as she sits down opposite him. Louis looks at the food he just bought, letting it slip off his spoon unimpressed. “This is worse than in Doncaster and I didn’t think that was possible.” Louis accuses the food. 

“Start bringing your own. Promise, this food is worse than poison.” A guy he hasn’t met says to him. He’s got a big head with a blond buzz cut. 

“I found the one love of my life that I like to call curry.” Perrie exclaimed passionately as she swivelled the rice in the sauce dramatically. 

Jade honked a laugh, but accused her “stop stealing me food mate!” 

“You love me.” Perrie made kiss-faces at her, while Jade pushed her away with her hand. 

“Not when you steal me food.” Louis buzzes out their conversation and roams the cafeteria, everyone, and he does mean everyone is looking at them, almost envious. He looks at every table until he finds who he is looking for. _Harry._ He chooses to sit at a table in a small corner, hoping to hide inside the shadows. Any hopes of flying under the radar goes out the window with that brawling mess of a laugh that comes out of a blonde haired boy. Louis’ almost envious of the attention he’s getting from Curly. Harry lifts his eyes and stares at Louis, caught he blushes and looks back down on his plate. Tentatively he looks back up, Louis winks at him, just then Barbie turns to him, who tells Curly something, and he hides his face in his hands. _What’a tell him? Why you embarrassed love?_ He tares his eyes off of Curly, to look at buzz cut, who has stood up and walked over to a geek table. Without saying a word, he forcibly steals the lunch off of another kid. The kid simply shies away, fear surrounding him, as Buzz cut turns back to their table. _Shit I’m sitting with the bullies._

His name is Ashton, Ashton Irwin, who partners with him in biology. Ashton tells him about football in this weird town, “there’s a club alright, I’m in it by the way.” He tells him while they watch their teacher Ms Scherzinger talk about the big bang. 

“Could you get me an audition?” 

“Dunno if I like you yet Tommo. Don’t want a skiff on me team, right?” 

Louis scrunches up his nose annoyed, “you calling me a dumb?”Ashton grins at him. “Bastard.” Louis whispers under his breath, because Ms. Scherzinger is already looking their way with narrowed eyes. Louis’ knows he doesn’t like him, Ashton does perpetrate the big bad bully which needless to say Louis dislikes him. Nevertheless, it’s all Louis can think about during detention. He played footie as a forward in Doncaster, even managed to score the position of co-captain. This town would become much more bearable if he could play here too. He’d just need something to get an audition. 

Still, mentally dribbling a ball in his head, Louis walked through the empty hallways when he heard a crash. Rounding the corner, he saw Ashton and some of his bulky friends surrounding someone at the lockers. Textbooks were littering the floor, presumably their victim had let it drop in the course of impact that Louis had just heard. “Oh was that me…” Ashton fanned innocence. Their victim didn’t say anything “you’re a proper mess aren’t ye, you little fag?” One of his friends punched the locker hard right next to him “go on then, get back on your knees, get your shit back up, we know you like it down there.” 

“You can’t force me,” a weak voice whispered. 

“Didn’t hear ye there!” 

“I won’t,” the voice declared stronger. Louis walked down the other side of the hallway and his heart dropped when he saw the chestnut curls. And he saw him too. Tiny, little sprinkles of hope prickled in his green eyes. Ashton must have noticed it too, because he turned around. 

“You want something Tommo?” Louis looked every single one of the aggressors in the eye, one he thinks he remembers from Maths, Calum something or other. Harry still stares hopeful, silently pleading Louis to intervene, almost determined that Louis will save him. Louis’ eyes switch from green to Ashton. 

“See you at footie, Irwin.” And Ashton understands the deal, keep this quiet for a try-out.

“See ye around, skiff.” Louis turns around and walks away. Heartbreaking at the thought of Curly left behind. 

But not as much as Harry’s heart breaks as he watches Louis walk away. And how was Louis supposed to know that the young introvert that he was leaving behind had fantasised about him. Because that’s what he did, the boy from the bathroom, Louis, the one he was sure never to see again. At night, he’d lie in bed imagining the boy coming back into his life, saving him. Scaring away his bullies, holding him at night to calm his depressed heart, telling him how great he sang at the choir and simply being there, protecting him from the aggressive world that he had found himself in. How was Louis supposed to know all that? Know that by walking away, he hadn’t just broken Harry’s heart, but his fantasy, the one thing that kept his head above water. That because of him, Harry was falling. 

💚🍑💙

“Hello Ladies, what’s up?” A grumble of annoyance flittered through the changing rooms, once Ashton entered like a drama queen. 

“Your late!” Calum calls to him. Calum turns out to be the burly guy with white short hair, a square face and annoyed slanted eyes that sits in his Maths class. Louis has purposely ignored him most of the week in remembrance of what he did to Harry.

“Don’t ask, mum couldn’t finish her stupid telly show.” Ashton exclaimed, “she’s annoying the right fuck out me lately.” 

“Time to get a licence, you lazy cunt.” Someone shouted. Louis ignored the normal ramblings that were usual to a boy’s changing room _do girls ramble about things too? Do they talk about tampons or bras?_

“Who’s this?” Wayne, one of the guys asks. He goes to a different school than them, which is why Louis hasn’t met him yet. It’s Thursday and finally Louis’ try-out day for football. 

“Leave him, I’m getting him in.” Ashton intervened. 

Louis ignored the babble and walked out onto the pitch, introducing himself to Coach Winston. “You used to play for Doncaster, right?” 

“That’s right, coach.” 

“What position?” 

“Forward.” 

“Lets see what you can do kid.” Louis nodded affirmatively and the team started to huddle up close by. Coach started giving his speech about Louis being tested today, their pathetic game before the break and that they have to improve if they want to stay in the same league and not drop. “Irwin! Hood! Shut the fuck up and listen, you two will cost us our league, so shut it before you’re off the team!” Louis thought that was a little harsh, but he hasn’t seen the team play yet, even though he tried to climb the walls yesterday to properly prepare. They started running 12 laps around the pitch, which _seriously conditioning was never my strong suit_. While he huffs out, annoyed at his genes for letting him down, he hears a burning laugh, the only laugh that literally sounds like a ‘HAHA’. Sure enough when he turns around, there is a mop of dyed blonde hair running half a lap behind him. Niall. Harry’s best friend. Maybe not everyone in this team are cunts.

After a lung crushing last lap, they get put into twos to practice short dribbling passes. Louis immediately bee-lines for the blonde, “you me partner today, alright?” Niall looks a little astonished at the guy next to him that must be his usual partner but nonchalantly shrugs. So Niall is an easy going-guy, _noted_. It doesn’t take long for Niall to blurt out that he’s Irish and that his family transferred here at the beginning of last year. “How’d you like it here then?” 

“Dunno, sometimes I miss home, but Harry’s my saviour. Real good mate, that one.” Louis stays quiet, it’s good to hear Niall value their friendship. He’s got a feeling that Niall is Harry’s saviour too. 

“You live with him right?” 

Louis watches the honest face in front of him and nods “yeah, our mums are friends from school. He mentioned me?” 

Niall shrugs, “how long are you staying at his?” 

“Two months, I suppose.” 

Niall’s face scrunches to concentrate on the ball, when he suddenly earnestly says “Just be nice to him, please. He’s more fragile than you think.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Louis stops the ball to stare at the blue-eyed boy. 

“Just don’t hurt him or I’ll have you off the team as fast as you can say footie.” Niall puts his hands on his hips defensively. 

Coach screams “RIGHT, do some shots at the goal then.”

They do some practice, dribbling forward towards the goal, surpassing a defence player and taking a shot at the goal. The defender turns out to be the boy in first row, the _non-team player_ hanging on Cow-hells lips. Louis already rolls his eyes, before he even attempts the drill. With his bum towards him, he dribbles around him, making the ball move, by swaying his foot ever so slightly over the top of the ball, faking a right turn to surpass him on the left. “Good work Tomlinson!” He hears the coach scream, “better luck with the next Payne.” With a happy cheer Louis scores.

“Cheers, hit the showers boys.” Louis walks over to grab his water bottle and puts his head together with Sandy Beals who accidentally kneed Payne in the crotch trying to fend him off, naturally they were friends right away. “Tomlinson, over here.” Sandy gave him a thumbs up, and Louis ran over to coach. “You were good out there today. You definitely need to learn a lot, but I think we can work on that.” Louis started bouncing on his feet excited. “I need you to go to the doc and get yourself checked out before I can let you join the team.” He handed Louis a few papers which detailed the exact test he needed to take, he could just do them at Dan’s practice “once you did that, come in with your mother, and we’ll sign you on.” 

“Thanks coach.” He bolted back to the changing rooms to tell Sandy, Josh and Niall the good news. 

“Mum, mum, mum!!!” He screams as he runs into the house. He catches a glimpse of her on the armchair and rushes into her tiny arms. 

“What’s gotten into you?” Louis sits back up thrusting the papers into her face, she blinks trying to read what it says, but fails because Louis is shivering so hard. 

“Mum, I’m in. FOOTIE! I’m in the FOOTIE TEAM!” 

“Oh…congrats son.” She gives him multiple kisses on his cheek, “just have to do a few tests.” She grins and takes the paper to see what exactly they have to do. 

“I’m going to go puke.” Gemma says from the corner of the room, “Tommo you just lost all maleness to yourself!” 

Louis gives her a hard look, “could say the same to you, but I suppose masculinity is just in your nature love.”

“Be nice.” His mother warns, “or I won’t take you to Dan’s to take these.” She waved the papers into his face, he frowned. Daisy and Phoebe grabbed his ankles and his bum slipped off of his mother’s lap. They crawl on top of him and tickle and kiss him as they shower him in support. Louis giggles flamboyantly and tickles them back until they back off, when he looks back up from where he is sitting Lottie is whispering something to Harry, but there is the fondest sweetest smile on his expressive face. It’s stunning how much Harry can convey with his features, almost like a cartoon character. Curly’s cheeks turn pinkish as their eyes hold for a moment. 

💚🍑💙

“What crawled up your asshole?” Zayn asks him the next day after school had been let out almost an hour ago. Louis was held back by Cow-hell to talk about his behaviour in class, mainly the fact that he had been ‘excessively using his phone today’. What was one to do if he did not prepare for a pop quiz, _that wanker. Definitely not my fault._

“Boredom I suppose.” Louis retorted as he stared at Zayn smoking on the steps of the front door of the school ground. “You do that out in the open like that, mate?” Louis watches Zayn’s hand rise back to his mouth. 

“Teachers gave up on me.” Zayn grinned proud. 

Louis scoffed and unpacked his own pack of cigarettes “what you still doing here?” 

“Was studying with Perrie. Library.” _Snogging more like_. 

“Right.” 

Zayn stood up, “heading home now, wanna join?” Louis grinned and nodded.

A little time later, Zayn drags him around his house to a small shed. Louis saw right away that someone had been using it: a ripped lanky sofa with unmade blankets stood in the middle of the room, empty beer bottles clustered the floor and a used condom floated in the toilet. Cigarette buds could be seen in ashtrays in every corner, Louis picked one up and out of curiosity smelled it: weed. Other things were also there: few clothes, junk and paint. Lots and lots of paint. All four walls of the small shed were painted, the artist must have had so many ideas that he even covered some things. “You live here?“ Louis asked incredulously. 

“Nah mate” Zayn was laughing harshly. “My mum got annoyed. She wants her house to be white, I kept colouring her walls.“ He chuckles to himself again like this was an inside joke. Louis’ smile was a little crooked. “She ain’t a comic fan. Got me this place to paint,“ 

“and get high?“ Louis held up the old bud he was still holding in his hands. 

Zayn grinned mischievously “that's one and the same thing mate“ this time they both laughed. 

Louis plopped down on the surprisingly comfy sofa. Zayn was rolling a new blunt. “You ever?“ Louis nodded. Granted the experience had done nothing for him, but they do say that it takes a few times before its effects finally kicked in. Or he’s just one of those blokes who feel absolutely nothing from weed, which would _just suck_. Zayn and Louis lounged on the sofa playing on the Xbox (which was connected to the electrical system of the main house) while passing the blunt back and forth. Slowly Louis’ mood lifted, his speech became a little slurred, and he felt himself drifting on a new level of floating, nothing could or would touch him now. Not even green scared round eyes. 

“So the Styles kid, what’s up with him?“ If Zayn thought it odd for Louis to ask he didn’t show. He just shrugged while taking a rather long drag and lifting his controller, viciously slanted it to the right in an attempt to get his player to act like his controller. “Why they bullying him?“ Louis tried again. Allowing Zayn the upper hand in the game so that he would spill. 

“He’s gay.“ 

“Right. Small town and all?“ he expected Zayn to nod and affirm. Small towns were rarely lived in by open-minded people. Alone the thought of someone being gay was enough for them to put him on a spike. Usually. 

“Nah.” Zayn shakes his head, finally looking at him. “People here don’t mind that much. It’s just .... well... H came out last year.“ _H? Are they close? Does Zayn know him well?_ Hot flashes cloud his mind, and it takes him a short second to realise what Zayn had said next “Ashton, he played a prank on him. I don’t know much, but Ash came to school one day showing everyone a picture of H sucking him off.“ _Beautiful green eyes, watering as he pushed deeper. Choking around his length, but pushing him to continue, wanting him to use him. Chestnut hair in disarray as he held onto the curls to thrust. Beautiful gurgling moans._ Louis hadn’t noticed that his fists were clutching, face scrunched up, cock half hard and his chest was heaving with what he now realises as anger. 

“Ashton?“ he got up, Ashton that prick who had cornered _his beautiful boy_ at the lockers. Ashton with the horrible laugh. 

“Yeah Ashton. Ashton Irwin. You know him, he’s on your footie team.“ 

„Yeah I know who you’re talking about.“ 

“He’s a cunt.“ Zayn agrees. “He was dating Gemma at the time. H was so drunk, he didn’t know. Gemma punched Ash in the balls in front of the whole school, and he’s so scared of her he didn’t send the pic around. Still has it on his phone, though.“ 

_Ashton still has it on his phone_ , Louis’ mind goes through endless amounts of possibilities on how to get into Irwin’s phone to delete it. His heart clenched, no wonder that Curly’s bullies always made jokes about Harry on his knees. And while Zayn won one round after the other, Louis’ mind continuously went back to the night he met Harry, in a bathroom at a concert. At some point he looked down at his phone and saw frantic messages from his mum and step-dad.

Dan  🙄

Louis your mother is worried.

Where are you kid?

Mummy  ❤️

Boo bear dinners ready

where are you?

louis?

this isn’t funny?

Where the hell are you? 

Sorry mum, phone was off.

I’m at Zayns. Coming home late.

His mother replies almost automatically with a ‘This isn’t over!’ text. Louis groans loudly, he’s in a lot of shit now. Might as well enjoy the rest of the night.

💚🍑💙

He doesn’t exactly remember how he got back into his own bed, well technically Anne’s guest room. There is a dim memory of climbing into his room through the rose vines into his window, but doesn’t really know when or how. But there is someone tickling him, “the fuck?” 

“Mum said, you shouldn’t say that any more!” Louis lifts one eye to the brightness, which gets clouded by his tiny sister blinking down at him. 

“Daisy?” 

“Nope.” 

“So Phoebe?” 

She looks at him and starts poking him, “did you lose parts of your brain?” 

“What?” This is too much thinking so early in the morning, _wait what time is it again?_

“Lottie said that you can lose your brain or was it part of it… anyway…” she kept talking, but Louis zoned her out in favour of closing his eyes again, when she started poking him again.

“Ask him, Phoebes!” squeals a voice from somewhere to the right.

“Louis?…” Phoebe pokes “Louis?” 

“Hm…?” 

“Can you put the telly on for us.” 

“Argh… I thought I explained how to do it.” 

“Yeah but we wanna watch a DVD…please Louie.” And how could he say no to that? He sits up and takes a moment, _everything is swimming, am I on a boat?_ Both twins grab one of his hands and drag him down the stairs. Mechanically he puts on the DVD that Daisy gives him, both squeal when the Harry Potter music starts playing. Louis groans and walks back to his bed where he face-plants.

The next time he wakes up his alarm clock reads just after midday. Surprisingly no one had woken him, not even his mother who warned him about his delayed response over text last night. After a quick shower and a toast, he silently slips into Lottie’s room and the two watch some kind of chick flick about a girl playing footie. After a while Fizzy joins them, “the house is so quiet.” 

“Why?” Louis asks eyes glued to the screen by the girl fantasising about David Beckham, _who could blame her really?_

“Mum gone to ballet with the twins and the Styles’ are at their dads.” 

“Harry’s not home?”

Fizzy turns to look at him quizzically. “Nope. Their dad lives in Manchester, they went last night.” 

“Where were you last night by the way?” Lottie asks. not very smooth. 

“Zayn.” 

“The emo kid that every girl can’t keep their mouth’s shut about?” A roll of her eyes accompanies said statement. “Yeah him.” 

“Can’t really blame them though, those cheekbones …” Lottie trails off. 

“Yeah and that body in a leather jacket. I die!” 

Louis rolls his eyes himself, “please tell me none of you are fantasising about my new friend?” 

“Says the one that is fantasising about David Beckham.” 

“ ‘m not” Louis defends weakly. 

“Oh those eyes…” 

“…doesn’t that haircut suit him well?” 

“…can’t believe anyone could look so good with hair like that.” 

“…oh…and those arms.” Fizzy sighs dramatically. 

“Alright, alright girls, stop taking a piss.” 

“Bet Zayn look good in that hair cut too.” Lottie muses. “

You’re both banned to talk to Zayn.” Both girls giggle. 

“Yeah, oh well, Harry’s quite cute too.” Fizzy looks dreamily at the ceiling. 

Louis bolts upright looking earnestly at his sisters, “no fookin way!” 

“What?” they squeal in unison.

“Harry’s off limits!” 

“Why?” 

“That’s why!” 

Sorry to break it to you boo bear, but there was no reason attached to that exclamation.” 

“Don’t call me that,” Louis flops back into bed, his voice starts failing “just don’t.” He realises that his sister exchange a weird look between each other, but he doesn’t have the energy to ask them about it.

When his mother comes home, Louis gets a lecture about proper etiquette, asking for permission to stay late, not coming to dinner, appeasing her mind. Louis just lets her go off on him while sitting on the edge of the bed listening intently. “Sorry mummy.” He finally says.

She smiles happily, brushing his fringe out of his face as she sits down next to him, giving him a small kiss to his forehead, “was it good?” 

“Yeah.” 

“I’m glad your making friends boo bear.” They cuddle a little until Dan walks in to inform them that they need to start cooking, something that his mum thinks she has to do to repay Anne and Robin for their kindness.

On Sunday morning both families sit on the couch watching a quiz show when a whiff of bread enters the room. Gemma, who had returned in the early hours for breakfast, looked over her shoulder and grinned. Giving the twins a poke with her big toe she motioned over her shoulder. Louis turned around too, to see Harry standing in the doorway, eyes big with awe at what they were watching, with a huge box in his arms. “I brought cake!” he informs them. Daisy and Phoebe almost tackle him, but Dan is able to interject their run, catching them by their middle. 

“Why do you smell like bread?” Louis asks with a raised brow, while Harry puts the box down on the coffee table. 

“I work at a bakery in town on Sunday mornings.” _Does the smell linger in your curls?_ Louis just stares at him. _If I’d put my face into them, will I be able to whiff a mix of your smell and bread?_ Louis shakes his head, terrible thoughts, just _get out of my head._ When he looks back up Anne is passing around plates and forks, Harry is biting his lips looking at him, but Louis only wills his head to the side to get the fringe out of his eyes. Harry follows the notion with an o-face. 

“What did you bring us love?” 

“Carrot cake, chocolate fudge and strawberry muffins.” Louis grins, of course he takes the carrot cake. 

“Come her babies.” Gemma gets both of the twins onto her lap, and Louis quickly realises that Harry has to sit down next to him. He scolds, but moves his leg patting the spot next to him. 

“Really wish I had younger sister, you two are just so adorable.” Gemma teases. 

“Not fair.” Harry whispers next to him, “they’re just so cute and young, can’t compete with that.” 

Gemma grins at him, “don’t worry sweets you’re still the bestest youngest brother.” 

Louis tries to concentrate on the show again, but he gets a tiny bit annoyed by the boy next to him nervously bumping his legs up and down. With another eye roll, _how have they not gotten stuck there yet,_ he reaches over the curly haired boy and takes a fork full of chocolate fudge from Harry’s plate. “Hey…” he pouts. Again, _I might add._

He lets it into his mouth and moans a bit, “fuck me donkey that’s good.” Harry giggles next to him. Louis smiles at him, he likes this Harry the giggly one, when his dimples pop. He scoops up some carrot cake on his fork and holds it up. “Open your mouth, Curly.” And so he does, pliantly like a robot. Louis shoves the fork into his mouth, grinning he cups his jaw and with a little force closes Harry’s mouth again. As he pulls the fork back he watches as the puffy lips flock as they suck the cake off of the fork. _It’s just so beautiful,_ his cock twitches in interest inside his slacks. 

“So how is it?” 

“Lou, I work there, I know what it tastes like.” 

“It’s good innit?” Harry nods grinning, “you make it?”

Harry shakes his head, “only sell and clean.” “Shame,” after short deliberation he informs him “I love carrots.” 

💚🍑💙

_Mental note: he likes my hair, keeps calling me ‘Curly’ (obvious proof). Defiantly likes my dimples (I think, keeps staring_! _) and he Loves carrots … swoon._

💚🍑💙

The next three weeks pass in a blur, four times a week he goes to football. Staying away from Ashton and Calum as much as possible meanwhile he befriends Niall, who is hilarious and loves to play pranks on people. Mostly they freak out Liam Payne, who also happens to sit up front in Economics Class. Payne is an actual pain, the opposite of a team player he knows what he can do and blames everyone else for mistakes. He’s got nobody back and nobody got his back. After footie, he goes over to Zayn’s shed, where he almost always runs into him snogging Perrie or painting. The lit a joint and play Mario Cart. Later, he picks up the twins from their various activities and runs back home with them. Where he eats Styles’ delicious meals, Anne and Harry are both delicious cooks. Sometimes he even finds it in himself to praise Harry, watching his ears go red with delight. 

He has managed to stay off of Cow-hell’s radar far enough not to gain more detention. On Wednesday of his third week, he finds out that their next match will be on Saturday. Their first match had been a week ago on a Wednesday, but Coach Winston had told him ‘sorry, Tomlinson you’re sitting this one out’.He simply hadn’t been in the team for long enough and sat at the sidelines frustrated most of the time. But he is determined that he will be playing this time, he pushes himself even more during training, hoping to get a starting position on the team. 

Friday rolls around and Winston tells him he’ll be starting. After practice, he rushes home to tell his mum the good news. He doesn't have to pick up the twins, because on Friday’s Lottie picks them up after school. “Mum I’m starting!” The group turns to him. 

“That’s great kiddo.” Dan tells him, unexpectedly taking him into his arms. Louis hugs him back, grinning against Dan’s shoulder. “What’s wrong?” He suddenly asks his mum, who is looking at him nervously. That’s when he realises the rest of them are all catching champaign glasses in their hands. 

“Honey,” his mother starts and Dan lets him go so that she can approach him better. “Dan proposed.” She tells him timid. 

“And you said yes?” It’s the only thing he can think of, he hears someone snort behind him.

“Of course, darling.” Louis’ face breaks out into a shit eating grin and tackles his mum. 

“You’re not mad?” 

Louis shakes his head, “why would I be?” 

“You hated the move so much. Iwas worried you’d be unhappy, boo bear.” 

“First off stop calling me that.” He raises his finger. 

Lottie snickers whispering “why? You afraid it’s unmanly?” 

Louis ignores her, “second, you deserve all the love in the world.” 

“OH baby.” Jay starts pampering him with kisses. 

“I don’t get it, why is he getting special treatment again? Nobody cared if I think it’s a terrible idea.” Fizzy muses behind them, but Louis turns towards Dan with narrow eyes. 

“Congratulations, pal.” He stretches out his hand. Dan takes it and firmly shakes it with a sly grin. 

“This is going to cost you, though.” Dan barks out a laugh before going stern when her comprehends his new step-sons earnest. 

“Wha’ ye get in mind boy?” He pulls Louis forward by their clasped hands to look down on him. 

“I want a car.” Dan watches him for a while, before he nods. 

Jay argues, “you don’t have to love.” 

“No no, let’s make this fun, boy. You said your starting on footie, tomorrow?” 

“Yep.”

“If you score a goal, I’ll get you a car. Deal?” 

“No problem-o!”

Saturday morning, Louis couldn’t stop bouncing his leg at breakfast. He was so nervous he couldn’t eat a single thing. “We’re coming of course. All of us.” Lottie says. Louis nods fiddling with his cup of tea. He can’t really listen to anyone talk, he was already dressed in his jersey, which proudly read _Tomlinson 28_. 

“So proud of you boo.” Jay gives him multiple kisses as they approach the pitch. 

“Mum, I love you but…” 

“No more kisses where your teammates can make fun of you, I know. I’m just so proud seeing our name on your back, me love.” Louis beams up at her. He needed to win this one, he wanted that car, he didn’t make that licence early so that he’d have to get carted around during college. The changing room was lively as ever, music blasting and the boys boxing each other, hyping one another up. He takes his usual seat next to Sandy and Niall. 

“Saw your entire family arrive,” Niall confronts Louis “it’s good. Can use all the support we can get.” 

“Your family here?” 

Niall nods, “my dad. My mum and brother still live in Ireland.” 

“Right, sorry bro.” 

“No worries,” Niall says cheerfully, “got my girlfriend Barbs out there and Harry too.” 

“Harry’s here?” Niall nods. “Thought he’s with his dad on Saturdays.”

“He was, but he’s also the best friend in the world.” For some reason that makes Louis giddy. Harry’s going to be watching, and he cut his time short with his dad to be here. He starts ringing his hands again, his legs nervously bumping up and down again.

They’re loosing 2:1. Winston makes a motion from the sidelines to let them know that there are only 10 minutes left. Their goalkeeper decides for a light pass towards his defender. Louis screams “Payno!!!!”, Liam lifts his head nods and makes a long shot. Louis lets it jump off of his chest before taking control off the ball. His hair dangles in his face wet and greasy as he starts dribbling forward. The shorts are clinging to his bum and thighs as he outmanoeuvres a defender, entering the penalty box. He aims and shoots, giving the ball a spin and it dives behind the goalies back into the net. Louis rips his arms up and cheers. He gets run down by Ashton and Niall who tackle him to the ground. 

Once he stands up again, he looks towards the breachers, his sisters and wiggling a ‘Go LOUIE go go go LOUIE’ poster in the air, cheering red-faced underneath it. Dan gives him a thumbs up, while Louis pokes out a tongue at him and Dan visibly pets himself on his back for his A-Class parenting skills. Louis rolls his eyes, but then they catch onto chestnut curls barely contained by a dark green headband, flying around in excitement. He was hugging a girl next to him with light brown wavy hair and shiny skin. A pang of jealousy overrides his nervous system and despite his hot skin he gets goosebumps. Prickling icy and hot at the same time over his fiery skin like a sap of a jellyfish. Harry locks eyes with him, green blooming with excitement, almost the same shade as when they saw each other almost three weeks ago in Styles’ kitchen. Harry waves enthusiastically and Louis grins back, fairly sure that his blue eyes are firing up a storm themselves. The tie in his stomach dissolves slowly, without thinking about it, he throws him a kiss with his fingertips. He freezes, _a kiss? What in the bloody hell is going on with me?_ A whistle gets him back into the game, and he returns to his position. Smiling slyly at Ashton who points to his wrist, _right we still haven’t won the game._

And they don’t. The score remains 2:2, but they didn’t loose, and he scored “so I get the car!” 

Dan laughs “yes, Louis you get a car. Didn’t say what condition it will be in.” Louis pouts but gathers Daisy into his arms to give her a sloppy kiss. 

“Eww…” she giggles. 

“Am I not cool enough to give me sister a kiss?” She winds out of his embrace as Niall approaches them. 

“Good work, son.” A man next to them pats him on his back, father son smile fondly at each other. “ ‘m Bobby, met your parents on the stands.” Bobby reaches out to Louis, and he shakes it slowly, he thinks about correcting him but decides that if he wants the car he’s going to have to accept Dan as his father. At least he was a father of sorts, unlike his real dad. He was about to think about missing Mark, his real step-dad/only real dad of his life, when a light brown breeze flew into Niall’s arms. It was the same girl Curly had hugged fifteen minutes ago. His own face was suddenly berried in curls of their own. 

“Well done.” 

“Thanks, lad.” He feels plushy lips on his cheek and despite himself he feels his ears burn. _Shit, did he just kiss me?_ Louis arms flitted up to take a hold of Harold himself by grabbing him just above his waist and thumb brushing his ribcage. _They were made to hold you here._ Harry went lax and let go of him, smiling shyly. _I knew blowing him a kiss was a mistake._ Louis gave him what he hoped to be an encouraging smile. 

“TOMMO, you coming to the party, mate?” It’s Calum screaming over his shoulder, Zayn is rustling through a backpack next to him. 

Louis grins “Course mate.” Zayn gives him a pointed nod, as if to say ‘see you there’, dragging a cigarette out of his pocket. Louis’ mother clears her throat next to him. “Come on mum, I scored I deserve to celebrate.” 

“You’re getting a car.” Niall points out. 

“I thought we were just becoming friends? Anyway, you” he pointed at Dan “are going to let me go, because you want to marry me mum.” He grins putting his fists on his hips. 

Dan grins, “hard bargain, but I think he should be allowed to celebrate with his friends.” Jay nods. Bobby too. 

Niall turns to Harry “you coming too?” Harry looks like a deer in headlights. 

“Sorry no.” 

“Come on Haz, it’ll be fun.” 

“I have to go to work tomorrow morning.” 

“I’ll go.” Lottie offers, but Louis only laughs which ends that uncomfortable conversation, his sister pouts. 

“Just for an hour.” 

“But I have to go to work at five.” 

Niall shrugs sadly, Louis agrees “you’ll be missed Harold.” 

Louis is stumbling through dance moves, face scrunched up in concentration as his bum grinds down on someones front. Jade is stuck to his side and laughs into his ear as Perrie gives her a kiss. _Interesting, Perrie and Zayn must be really secure in their relationship._ So it appears that he’s grinding on Perrie but who cares, being sandwiched between two women is great for his reputation. Even if he misses grinding down on a cock, preferably Luke’s, his old hook up or Harry. He throws his head back, whipping Perrie with his greasy quiff. “Are you getting hard?” Jade whispers into his ear. Louis just grins drunkenly and Jade laughs rewarding him with a sweet kiss to his lips. 

“Want a joint?” He says unexpectedly. Perrie and Jade remain on the dance floor as he goes looking for Zayn, the designated weed dispenser. He stumbles into someone near the kitchen, Louis slurs an “Oi, watch it.” 

“You watch it Tommo.” _Oh Liam, eye roll please_. 

“Payno.” He reuses the nickname, “just wanted to say…thanks for the pass.” 

“What?” 

“Well without you, I wouldn’t have scored…so thanks.” 

“Your welcome.” Payne says flustered. 

“He’s not too bad, he thanked you.” Louis turns to the sharp high-pitched tone of a girl next to Liam. She’s the same one that sits with Payne in Cow-hells class, “hey were in Cow-hells class together.” The girl raises an eyebrow at him, while slurping on a drink, _did she bring Starbucks to a party? Extraordinary._

“I’m Eleanor.” Louis waves at her awkwardly. 

“Louis. Did you bring Starbucks to a party?” 

She looks down at her cup as if she didn’t know what she was holding, “yup. Spiced it, though.” 

Louis laughs, _I like her_. “Why you hanging with this doofus then?” 

Payne snorts giving him a shove, but the girls terrible laugh rings in his ear when she replies “Payno isn’t that bad, Louis.” She reuses the nickname, _great its catching on_. Louis is giddy with amusement. “He just don’t know how to share.” 

Liam opens his mouth to protest, but Louis cuts him off “want a blunt?” The girl laughs and nods. Louis interlaces their hands and pulls her with him away from Liam. 

On the back porch they find Zayn with Josh and Sandy from footie and Ashton with his entourage Micheal Clifford, Luke Hemmings and Calum Hood. “Oi Oi!” Louis greets from afar. Eleanor smiles at all of them and gives a few some kisses as a greeting. They pass a blunt back and forth and at some point Eleanor goes back into the house with Josh and Sandy. “I lost the girl…” Louis says bewildered, _how did that happen? Wasn’t she here a minute ago_? Ashton laughs at him, “I’d prefer it if you laughed with me. Not at me.” Louis is still slurring. Calum grunts next to him, giving him another beer. 

“Well, at least we now know you ain’t a fag, mate.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“The way _that_ fag keeps staring at you, never know these days.” 

“Hey, don’t.” Zayn interjects. Louis is so hazy he doesn’t know what they are talking about. 

“Saw him smooch you today.” Calum barks. 

“Give him a break.” Louis argues. 

“That means shut up Ash.” 

“Oh I forgot, you used to be friends right? What happened? He try to blow you too?”

Zayn’s eyes go hard and for a moment Louis blood goes cold “your dangerously close to a beating Iwrin!” 

Michael raises his voice for the first time, “shut it Ash, or we won’t get no more weed.” 

Somewhere in the back of his mind Louis notices that that’s a double negation which would make it a positive statement, but he’s not in the mood to argue. 

“I got to take a leak.” Louis stands up and stumbles to the bathroom. Someone opens the door and helps him inside. His mind is still railing from the conversation, _oh he just really_ “wish they’d stop talking about Hazza that bad.” 

“Mhm…me too.” Louis looks up to stare at Zayn’s dark eyelashes fan against his cheeks. 

“You’re very beautiful you know?” Zayn giggles from the drunken compliment. 

“Drink this.” Louis downs an entire 1 litre water bottle right in front of Zayn, “now piss.” Zayn turns around while Louis pushes his pants down to piss in front of Zayn. He doesn’t even have the consciousness to feel ashamed. Zayn is refilling the water bottle, when Louis pushes him aside to wash his hands, _yes I still have decency_. 

“How do you know him?” 

“Who?” 

“Hazza!” Zayn looks inquisitive “we went to primary school together. We were pretty close, till I went to secondary school. Just didn’t have the same set of friends any more. Lost touch is all.” 

“How’d you find out about him being gay?” 

Zayn shrugs, nonchalant as always, oozing boredom “dunno, suppose I always kinda knew.” 

“You mind it?” 

Zayn pushes the water back into his hands “nah. Wouldn’t.” He pushes back his hair, his eyes roam the bathroom until they settle back on Louis “you trying to tell me something here, Tommo?” Louis shakes his head. “Their right you know?” 

“About what?” 

“H does stare at you a lot. He really does like you for some reason. Don’t really know why, but don’t hurt him alright? He goes through enough shit every day.” 

Louis holds up his hand and tries to look as honest as possible “promise, I’ll try.” Zayn’s not convinced, but doesn’t push it.

💚🍑💙

Once Zayn had pointed it out, Louis couldn’t stop thinking about it. Harry did stare at Louis a lot. It never really bothered him, because he liked those light greens following him around. But he wasn’t willing to come out to his school. Alright, he came out when he was thirteen, his mum finding him lip-locked with Stan, his best friend, in his bedroom. He told his mum that he made out with a boy and girl and that he liked both and didn’t care for their opinion on the matter. His mum had given him a kiss, and Louis had sodded off. It never felt like a coming out, he had a girlfriend in Doncaster for Christ’s sake. He liked snogging with her just fine enough, but he appreciated a man’s touch just as much. But being here changed everything. 

Suddenly he realised the liberties that he had enjoyed back home, the pressure of being ‘normal’ was different here. And because he was never anything but normal, he had to control himself more, such as stopping his wrists from flopping forward that always looked ‘too gay’ (especially when her started running); he couldn’t be flamboyant any more, and he had to wear more baggy clothes. All in all, it wasn’t too uncomfortable of a transition, but it made him realise the true extent of how different he really was, even if he didn’t feel different. _I guess that’s the point in growing up, finding out who I truly am and whom I want to be associated as._

Anyway, Harry stared at him. Honestly Louis felt flattered, but it made him uncomfortable when others made fun of them for it. Deep down in his gut he also felt the tinge what this bullying was doing to Harry. 

Harry couldn’t help but stare at him, and it didn’t go unnoticed. Soon Louis friends started making gross remarks and sometimes they’d lick their lips suggestively and watch Louis crumble out (an uncomfortable) laugh. They made fun of the situation “fagy is looking at you again“; “I think he’s dreaming of your dick.“ Today was no different, it was Thursday close to a month since moving here. “He must be adopted... there is no way that bitch fag is related to Gemma!“ Harry looked over to Louis for comfort but the older boys face was scrunched up in shame. Harry turned back around onto his stomach on his picnic cloth in the park, delving back into the book. Louis rolled his eyes, but he didn’t realise that Harry never turned the page. He was simply staring at the same sentence, wishing for the time to pass and unable to read a single paragraph. His breath was stuck in his throat and tears were held back by his determination. He wanted to go home, but if he does then they win. Then they know what they say truly hurts him. He can’t have them know. 

Ashton aims and hits the tree near Harry. “Your aims shit, mate.“ Comes the giggle of Michael Clifford. “Tommo!“ Reluctantly Louis took position and aimed. He tried to touch the ball as softly as possible to take the pain out of it and he did have to admit to himself he didn’t aim properly. Nonetheless, the ball found its aim. Curly’s head shot up as he looked down on his red thigh. 

Louis ran over to him, his hands held high “sorry. Sorry.“ He grabbed the ball again and ran back to his friends, unwilling to see the pain and possibly even betrayal in the younger boys eyes. 

“Looks like your aims shit too.“ Ash laughs roughly. Harry turned back onto his stomach, but Louis felt the pang in his chest as he saw the bruise he had caused on that milky white leg. 

“My turn,“ someone else calls. And this time a fast velocity hit Harry right in the back of his head. He screamed and held his head. 

“Stop it!“ Eleanor’s call echoed. She walked over to Harry and cradled his curls, Louis felt something twists in his insides. He had those in his hands once. She was saying something to Harry, and he nodded, sniffling a little. 

“Don’t try to hard with this one El, he ain’t interested in that sort a thing.“ 

The footie team broke into loud laughter, but Eleanor’s eyes zero in on Ash ”Awww, Ash-y, he’s got more of a chance than you. I’d sooner toss myself off a cliff than be touched by you.” She turned back to Harry, and he smiled a little. She gave him a kiss on the cheek and helped him pack up his things. The two trotted off together and a small blush crept along Curly’s cheek. Ash was still trying to figure out what El said when Louis grabbed the ball again, and they went back to their original game. 

Louis felt uneasy going home. He felt like he had made progress with Harry all this time on living with him and now because of one game he lost his trust again. He debated picking flowers for him from their neighbours garden, but felt like that gave him the wrong idea of his intentions. He dropped his football bag on the ground next to the front door. He gulped down some fresh cold water from the fridge when he was suddenly tackled by someone with blondish hair. “Your just that big of an asshole right?” 

“What you talking about?” Louis was fighting Gemma’s tiny fists that were incredibly strong pounding in on his chest. 

“You don’t have to like him, I know he can be annoying and overbearing at times. And god is he childish. I don’t care if you wish him away, but bullying really Louis? He’s had enough of a bad time as it is!” 

“I’m not bullying him.” 

“Louis your just as big of a cunt as the rest of them if you don’t stop it and just stand by!” Louis blood started to boil, he knew he should have to help Harry, but he didn’t need this hypocrisy. 

“And you?” 

“I protect my baby brother Louis!” 

“Then where were you when your own boyfriend used your younger brother as a subject of child pornography?!” She blinked at him a little, she sighed and rested her fists by her side. 

Resigned she explained “Ash threw me a birthday party, dickhead got drunk terribly. It was also the first time that Harry got really drunk. Somehow they ended in the same bathroom, and Ash took the photo. Harry told me what he could remember after my friend found Harry desperately trying to claw off Ash’s phone.“ She brushes her hair back, but regains her anger when she looks at Louis. “I found out, broke up with him in front of the entire school and rammed my knee into his groin. He couldn’t walk for a week! Much less footie. He never shared the picture. But really Louis,” her face turned pleading “I need my brother to be okay when I leave here. Do us both a favour make sure this is our last conversation on the topic and stop standing by!” She trotted off. 

But even if Ash never circulated the picture, people still knew about it. Did he get rid of all copies? Or did he simply heed Gemma’s warning and simply refrained from what’s app blasting it to everyone? Louis made himself some tea and tried to ignore the nagging feeling in the pit of his gut. 

He was still standing there when Dan entered the house after a long day. “You alright kid?” 

Louis looked at him “I dunno. I just don’t know.” 

“Just one more month, yeah? Then we’ll have our own house.” Louis nodded, but Dan persisted “I love your mum, Louis. I’ll give her, your sisters and you, a good home, I promise.” 

“I know. It’s not about that.” Dan raised his head to the sealing “ah your little spat with Gemma.” Louis turned to face him, how much had he heard? “I don’t know what it was about” Dan raised his hand in defeat, “but your mum told me about you and Stan, I know it’s not easy here…” 

“I’m not queer.” 

“Course not.” Dan muses.“I respect you and your decisions and I will support every single one of them.” 

“Why?” Louis asked, feeling tears sprinkle at his eyes. Gemma just argued the exact opposite.

“Because deep down you’re a good kid. You defend those that you love and you don’t take shit from anyone, it’s who you are. It’s who your mum taught you to be.” 

“I’m an awful person. I only care about my own image. I’m narcissistic egotistical dipshit.” Louis argued, finally some tears left their cage and slid down his cheeks. 

“You know that not true,” Dan placed a hand on his shoulder reassuringly. “Louis, you’re a kid. A teenager, you’re not meant to have it all together yet. That’s what the teens are about. One day you’ll look back and maybe they’re will be some shame to what you did, some guilt. But Louis life is about learning, learning walk tall and proud. You and every else on this planet has to figure out how in time, so no one can tell you how to do it. I want you to hear me on this, no matter what Gemma says or how you feel about anyone, girl or boy, as long as you are true to yourself you’ll be free.” Louis buried his head in the crook of Dans arm, letting his tears fall freely now. 

“I’m still awful to Harry.” 

Dan hummed thoughtfully, “then stop.” 

“What?” Louis tried to look up at the man comforting him. 

His eyebrows were borrowed in concentration, but Dan seemed to be decisive, “make yourself proud Louis, do the right thing by you and no one will be able to touch you.” Louis sniffled, but couldn’t help the calmness that clouded his mind like the smell of your favourite food that overpowers the senses. Maybe Dan wasn’t that terrible after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some canon/explanatory notes…
> 
> 1\. All the pictures in my banner are from the internet and therefore not my own.  
> 2\. This work is not beta read, so I apologise for all the errors.  
> 3\. I know Harry grew up in a small town named Holmes Chapel in Cheshire, UK. Since I have never been there before, I have decided to create the fictional town of Cheshire instead.  
> 4\. The boy’s school is based on the British school system. Louis is in lower sixth form (Grade 11 American School System) and Gemma is in upper sixth form (Grade 12 American School System), because Louis moved in the middle of the school year, they forced Louis to repeat a year. (which is actually canon, since Louis did have repeat the A levels.) In sixth form the students are working towards earning their A level examination. Niall and Harry on the other hand are in the last year (year 10 American School System) of fifth form.  
> 5\. The Football Team Louis tries out at is an independent Football Club, all football teams are entirely fictional.  
> 6\. The pictures in the Banner are all from the internet and not my own.


	2. A Gift for A Boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2...hope you enjoy!

“Why don’t you take Harry with you?”

“It’s a footie party.” 

“So?” Anne looks at him with big hopeful eyes. 

“Its alright, I don’t want to go.” 

“You won’t be alone, sweetheart. Niall will be there! There’s nothing to worry about. Come on darling, just try.” It’s Louis’s fifth week at his new school, and it’s another footie party, though he can’t name the number they kind of blur together. Anne is currently staring at her son in her kitchen, while Louis nervously tries not to pry, meanwhile trying to think of a way to get out of taking Harry with him. If he wants to go why doesn’t he go with Niall? 

“Fine.” 

“Great, Louis does he need to dress up?” 

Exasperated Louis moans “please don’t.” _Who knows what he dresses up like._ To be honest he hasn’t seen Harry in civilian clothing all that much, usually he sees him in school uniform, and then he’s gone to his dads for most of the weekend. 

“Oh Okay.” Harry’s eyes darken and his nose scrunches up weirdly as he looks at his hands. 

“I didn’t mean it like that, you know I didn’t.” Louis tries to clarify. Harry looks sheepish but doesn’t reply. “Just some tight pants and a shirt will do.” Harry nods. Anne turned to do something with the dishes not to pry similarly to himself a few seconds ago. Louis’ turns to walk away, he’s almost at the staircase when he looks back. Anne has returned to her son’s side and is rubbing Curly’s back for some reason, lowly discussing dressing options, Louis speaks up one last time “wear one of your cute headbands, I really like those.” Harry’s eyes go big with the faintest hint of a blush forming. _Shouldn’t have said that, should Not have said that, but it’s sooo true._

💚🍑💙

“She’s cheating! She’s cheating!!!” He heard Jade scream from upstairs, above him, some girls were having a race on some space hoppers. The Irwin house had glass walls and floors everywhere and a large bridge of a hallway crossing above the entryway. _Rich assholes, who has a glass hallway?_ Jade and Jesy are in a race hopping across the glass hallway on air-filled balls that bounce. Jesy, the cheat, had lifted hers up and ran for it, while Jade was still screaming after her, hopping away. 

“Don’t leave me alone.” He hears Harry whisper to Niall behind him. 

“Alright, let’s get you some drinks.” Louis screams at them over the loud music, moving them from the front door to the kitchen.

“Liam, you look like a tub!” Louis said as he handed Niall and Harry a drink a few minutes later. Liam turned around to him, his baseball cap wasn’t snapped back but stood out to the side, he did look ridiculous. 

“Hey! It’s Zayn’s actually.” He tries to defend himself, and Harry takes a tentative taste of the red cup. Louis grins when a small shiver goes through him. 

“It’s the way you wear it that makes it look bloody stupid, mate.” Liam pouts, but does not take the cap off his head. 

“It’ll look much better on me,” a girl next to Liam argues. She grabs his baseball cap and puts it on her own head. 

“That’s embarrassing, mate. Even Barbara looks better with it than you!” Niall chirps in, giving Barbara a kiss that she giggles into. Barbara Palvin was one of the girls at this school Louis actually happened to like. She was fun, out-going and boyish. She had stolen the heart of the Irish and spent most of her time skateboarding through the park. Meanwhile, she went to ballet every other hour. She even attempted teaching Louis skateboarding which was more difficult than he thought possible.

“Shots, everyone!” Zayn pushed shot glasses towards everyone filled to the brim with vodka.

“How do I do this?” Harry asked, _again_ behind him into Niall’s ear. 

Louis turned to the two and before Niall could explain, Louis demonstrated “Lick it. Salt. Drink. Bite the Lemon.” The corners of lips curved upward when he saw Harry’s eyes follow the movement of his tongue on the back of his hand. “Z, need another one.” Zayn laughed and almost toppled over to refill the glass over the large kitchen counter. 

“What are we cheering to?” 

“Dunno, do we need something to cheer to?” Liam wandered.

“To fucking shit up!” Harry supplied. 

“I’m all for that!” Soon enough the bite of the lemon ran down his neck, he smiled and repeated the process for the third time, watching how timid Harry licked his hand. Louis threw him a wink when their eyes locked. _Love it when he blushes just the right colour to fit his maroon headband._

“Let’s dance.” Barbara squealed holding on to Liam and Niall’s hand running to the makeshift dance floor. Harry’s face drained once he realised that Niall had in fact left him alone. Louis felt sorry for him and exchanged a look with Zayn. 

“Fancy a blunt?” 

The three of them Harry, Louis and Zayn were stuck in a pantry. “Didn’t know they could be this big!” Harry looked at the different small boxes in awe. Zayn snickered as he licked the paper foil of the blunt. 

“Alright Harold, food attacks usually happen After the first pull not Before.” Harry’s face fell, and he set down on the potato sack. Louis rubbed the back of his neck, _always saying the wrong things Tommo,_ _remember your promise_ _to Zayn and Niall be nice and Dan’s advice. He’s just so vulnerable all the time, can’t seem to do anything right with little Curly_. Zayn ignited their weed cigarette, exhaling with his eyes closed. 

“God that’s good, if I may say so myself.” Louis took it from him and copied his movements. Then he passed it on to Harry. 

He was looking at it for the longest time, until Zayn appeared to have had enough, fearing that it will go out again “put it between your lips and inhale, but inhale deep so that you can feel it in your lungs. Then exhale.” Harry placed it between his lips but did not inhale. 

“You don’t have to.” Louis assured him. Harry passed it back to Zayn but coughed repulsively. 

“Jesus, babe, breathe.” Louis was crouching next to him rubbing his back. 

Harry turned red from the nickname, but he only nodded “ ‘m okay.” 

Louis lifted his chin to stare at him. “You didn’t like that did you?” Harry went beat red. “That’s okay, Curly. Just leave it with us then, we’ll finish it.” 

Harry nodded thankfully, “can I stay here though?” Louis stood up and took it back from Zayn who was giving him a knowing look. Louis only rolled his eyes. 

“You don’t like dancing or what?” Harry furiously shook his head “I just flop around.” Both boys laughed curling their middle to stare at Harry’s big green eyes. 

“I’d love to see that.” Louis grinned at him and poked his cheek, “it’s a joke Curly, your dimples are allowed to pop at that.” With Louis furious poking, Harry broke out into a hesitant breathy laugh, and his dimples did come out. The high was rolling over them like a slow tide, and they gradually got out to walk on to the dance floor. Zayn was holding onto Harry’s hand when Louis saw Eleanor. He pressed himself against her, and she giggled intoxicated. He lifted his head out of the nook of her neck to stare at Zayn, who twirled Harry around his own axis. Harry was laughing with his dimples on full display. Zayn positioned him in front of himself and allowed the younger boy to sway with him. 

Similarly, Eleanor and Louis started swinging their hips in tune to the music. Louis wasn’t exactly a good dancer either, but Eleanor didn’t seem to mind. Her hands dug into his hips, they were about the same height, _annoyingly she’s a weeny bit taller._ And all he wants is to get Harry in front of him, dig his hand into his hips while he grinds down on his dick. 

He dares to look over at Harry and Zayn again, they have thankfully detached. Harry’s lanky and hobbles around with his perky little bum throwing his hands up into the air. His hips draw circles into the air and dropping to the floor like he’s dancing on a pole or something. The girls around him giggle, enjoying his intense attention of Harry’s gaze. Sweat is tripling down his face, but his hair stays put in its beautiful headband. Louis, staring over Eleanor’s shoulder tries to imprint the images in his eyes for later, begging God to let him remember this in the morning. That’s when Eleanor turns around to him, placing her arms around his neck and positioning her knee between his, their legs rubbing against each other. Louis closes his eyes and allows himself to feel the lull of the alcohol and the drift of the high. With a beautiful girl in his arm and tight ass pressed against his own he lets his mind wander and feels the beat of the song. _Let the soul dangle and all that cheesy stuff._

Louis has lost sight of Curly after Perrie had demanded attention from her boyfriend and started twerking against him. Harry had somehow drifted over to Niall and Barbara who had taken him in and let him flop about near them. Some people had given him weird looks, though Louis knew that wasn’t because of his stupid dance moves, but because they were astonished the victim of bullying final came to a house party and was dancing completely free of any care in the world. That’s when he sees him, Harry was exiting the bathroom with Barbara on his tail. It looked like she had readjusted his hair in his red bandana. His shirt was flapping half-open, three buttons had come undone revealing his muscles underneath, flashing his pink nipples _that I’d die to get my mouth on_. They were laughing, when they bumped into Ashton. He towered over Harry and Louis detached from El to walk up to the small group that was forming. “Tell you what, you suck me off one more time and I’ll think about it.” Ashton grinned mischievously at Harry’s wide eyes. 

“When are you going to accept that he was drunk and that he’d never touch you with a ten-meter poll?” 

“Still fighting his battles are we Barbs?” 

“It’s BAR-BA-RA!” She punctuated every syllable of her name perfectly, she truly hated that nickname. “He was completely inebriated, you realise some would call that rape.” 

“Careful, Barbie, snitches get stitches.” 

“Give the boy a break Ash!” Louis found himself saying. Ashton turned around to him and looked at Louis’ deserved figure, big bloodshot eyes from the weed and his t-shirt completely wet hanging from his thin figure.

“I get that you are bored, but fock off!”

“You interested in this Tommo? Is that it?” 

“He’s dating me, you cunt bag of a shit face!” El builds a wall behind Louis with Jade, Jesy and Perrie.

“Getting saved by girls again Styles!” Ashton sneers to Harry.

“I’ll just go.” Harry winces, the alcohol making his eyes drop. 

“No. You’re not leaving because a slimy piece of crap decided to like getting his cock sucked by a boy way too much.” Barbara challenges Ashton, holding onto Harry’s left wrist. Harry’s droopy eyes go wide for a second, his wrist shivers from the presumed blow back.

Ashton towers over the girl, but the sneer in her own face challenges him further, she won’t back off. “You know Barbs-ie, maybe your little queer friend over there just likes throwing himself at straight blokes, hoping anyone would take pity on his virgin ass. I basically had no choice.” 

“Back off, Irwin.” Niall throws himself in the mix, his hand is pushing Barbara and Harry behind him. His eyes morphed with hate, “no one touches me lass, laddie!”

“Not touching her, just him, unfortunately.” 

“I wanna go…” Harry pleads behind Niall. But Niall is busy having a stare contest with Ashton, who seems to change his mind about facing off with Niall. Ashton turns around to shove Louis against Eleanor’s chest.

“Stop protecting that queer or the next victim will be you!” It’s an empty threat and Louis knows it but his drunk mind still has to protect itself.

“That wouldn’t happen, not in a million years, but you, I don’t know. You already got a rep for it!” Ashton walks away, opting to pretend that he didn’t hear him.

💚🍑💙

They drove in silence for a moment, well technically Payne was saying something or other, that Louis was definitely not listening to. A few minutes ago Louis had run up to him and Danielle, demanding that he drive him home with Louis’ car. He was simply too drunk. He left Eleanor with a kiss, and Liam did the same to Danielle with a promise to grab an Uber from Harry’s house.

That’s when he saw the slumber figure walking on the dark pavement, his curls were bouncing forward as his head was turned to the ground in surrender. “Stop the car.” 

“What you on about.” 

“Stop the bloody car!” 

Payne finally made a full stop with squeaking tires, “Tommo what…?” But Louis got out and jogged up to the lanky figure. 

“Harry?” 

His head snapped up, hurriedly brushing away his tears, “wha you want?” 

“Come now Curly, not so harsh.” But Harry just sniffled and started walking away from him again. _What the hell happened after their confrontation with Ashton? Or was it the confrontation? No. He was fine, he was with Ni. What else happened? Who bad-mouthed you?_ “Wait…” Louis had to jog up to him, _why his bloody legs so long?_ Payne was following them at snail speed with the car, lowering the window to look at the pair “…I got a car. C’mon, get in, you big oaf.” 

“Why are you always so mean?” Harry sniffled. 

Louis’ drunken mind had a slightly hard time to think, his retort took a little longer than usual “honestly being quite nice right now!” Harry looked at him annoyed and sad. 

“Get in Styles!” Payne screamed out of the slow-moving car while trying to look at the street at the same time. Harry looked over Louis shoulder _god why did you make me so tiny and why is it quite hot to have Harry so close looking over me shoulder?_ Louis was eye-level with Harry’s mouth, his puffy perfect mouth _._

“Go on then Styles, don’t make us beg.” Harry was still bothered but only nodded, folding himself into the middle seat of the back while Louis took back his passenger seat. 

Payne was looking at Harry through the mirror “you got to stand up to them, Harry.” 

“Can’t” he admitted after a while. 

“Why not?” 

“Their stronger than me.” 

“Don’t be daft Harry, come with me to the gym and will get you strong and buff, alright?” Harry looked up and met Payne’s eyes. He smiled shyly and nodded. “Getting you more buff might help you with the lads as well, ey?” _With other lads?_ Images appear beneath Louis’ clenched eyes of Harry lip locked with someone else. Making _his boy_ moan out in pleasure, that really can’t happen.

“You really are an idiot Payno.” 

“Hey.” Liam grunts, not understanding where that came from.“You should be nicer to me, I’m getting out of my way to help you here. Didn’t have to drive your bloody car.”

“We’re eternally grateful.” Louis muttered sarcastically.

“Thanks pal.” He called over his shoulder towards Liam, pulling Harry out of the car. Louis grabbed Harry’s hand as they tip-toed around the house. They slowly turned the key and slid through the back door. There were end-credits playing on the TV, both their mums had fallen asleep on top of each other, presumably waiting for them to come home. 

“My mum probably checked my room if I came home on time.” Harry whispers and _of course she does. Proper mummy’s boy._

_“_ Thankfully I keep my door locked when I go out, me mum never knows when I come home.” Harry looks confused but lets Louis take the lead, walking them up the stairs, careful not to wake their mothers. Harry was looking back at the scene when he slipped. _That big oaf always stumbling over his own feet._ Louis turned back, holding on tighter to the younger boy’s hand to get him back up to his feet. “Shh…” Harry dug his head in shame, but didn’t let go of Louis’ hand. They quickly rushed upstairs, Louis unlocked his door and pushed Harry into it. 

“I better go…” Harry instigated playing with the hem of his shirt. 

“Nah. Stay here.” Louis was already stripping down to the bare minimum, his boxer. In his peripheral vision he could see Harry following his movements with his eyes. And maybe Louis let his hips sway a little more than usual to give him a good show. “Ye mum will have noticed you’re not in your own bed. You, not coming home makes me look bad too, so just get in, will ye?” 

Harry wasn’t convinced, but he didn’t have as much fight in him as he should “I dunno.” 

Louis rolled his eyes, “Curly, get in the bed … Hope you don’t sleep naked.” Harry quickly undressed, his movements faulty, and he fell over his foot again while he was pulling his pant leg over it. _Such a Bambi._ Nothing seductive about that, yet his curls bounced beautiful and his brow furrowed in concentration. Even his pouty bottom lip stuck between his teeth was endearing. Silently he slipped into bed next to Louis. “Good night, Harold.” 

“Night Lou.” 

Louis’ mind started slipping into bliss, dreaming of dancing Bambis, when Harry started talking again “freezing prince, green ‘n glued too…”.

“What are you on about?” Louis groaned, he really needed sleep and if his maths weren’t completely off, his mother will stand over his bed in at least four hours, and he direly needed that sleep. 

“I say…notice…artist a world.” 

“What?” Louis kicked Harry for good measure, a slight yelp and Harry sat up. 

“The fuck was that for?” 

“That was my question.” 

“What?” 

“I’m trying to sleep here, mate and you’re bubbling over there.” 

“ ‘m not!” 

“You’re talking some shit over there, and all I want is sleep. Shut it.” 

“I can’t.” 

“ ‘xcuse me?” 

He felt the bed shift and Harry’s voice conveyed some insecurities “I talk in my sleep.” 

“You what?” 

“Its somniloquy. I talk in my sleep.” 

“Oh.” Louis really didn’t know what to say to that. 

“I can leave.” Harry supplies an answer, but Louis will have none of that. 

“No bother, just dunno, talk quietly Harold.” With a scoff he closes his eyes again. Harry shifts but stays quiet. Now Louis is waiting for him to talk, hear that dark rumble of a voice whisper secrets into the night. Dull him into sleep. “What are you doing?” He questions after a while. 

“Waiting for you to fall asleep.” Harry whispers. Louis giggles, he turns to face Harry. He can’t see him, though. 

“Curly, I like your voice and if you fall asleep now, I might get lulled into the best sleeps of the week, because of your voice.” He imagines Harry turning pink from the unexpected compliment. He pokes a finger in Harry’s general direction and accidentally pokes him in the ear, “sorry. Sleep Harold! Please, love.” 

As predicted both Harry and Louis get awoken by a frantic mother, “what the hell were you two thinking? No note? No text? You were both meant to be home by eleven!” Louis pries an eye open to stare at Anne with her hands on her hips staring down at Harry, who had the blanket up to his nose. 

“Morning Anne,” Louis stretches his arms over his head, groaning as his bones popped. Her eyes skim over to him. 

“Tomlinson. Are you corrupting my sweet boy?” 

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” Her beautiful eyes narrow on him, it hits him how much she looks just like Harry. “Really, Anne. We got home at like half 11, granted that was a little too late, but you and mum fell asleep in front of the telly. Didn’t want to wake ye. Thought you two were bonding.” 

Anne didn’t look convinced, “then why is my son in your bed?” 

“Bonding!?” He grinned and Anne grunted out a laugh, meanwhile Louis saw his own mum enter. Her hair was in disarray from a night on the couch, and her nose was wrinkled up, which tended to happen when things were annoying her. 

“Louis, care to explain.” 

“Ehmmm….Well…you see…great party, got a little late. Harold and I are bonding.” Jay raises her eyebrow at him, absolutely confused. Anne is snickering, grabbing her friend bythe middle she whispers to let it go. She’ll explain later. Both mothers leave the room, convinced their sons are finally getting along.

“I better get going then,” Harry shimmied out of the bed and leaned over to grab at his clothes that he had frantically undressed the night before, _oh a cute perky bum._ Louis’ morning wood strains against his boxers seem _._ Harry straightened and turned around, face flushed and clutching his clothes against his crotch. Louis cocks his face to the right, _am I affecting you or is it a morning issue_. He grinned while Harry tried to waddle sideways out of his room “I’ll take the first shower!” Harry claimed. 

Louis grin grew even bigger, “sure thing, Curly.” He barked an honest laugh once Harry ran down the hallway. He closed his eyes, rubbing himself over his boxers. His mind wandered to Harry’s perky bum in their shower, soaping himself up and touching himself to get rid of his morning wood. Louis hand jackrabbits inside his slacks, his own skin warm and slick. He imagines Harry coming with his name on his tongue, a punctured ‘ _Harry_ ’ of his own made him squirt into his boxers. _God, I’m glad I have my own room._

💚🍑💙

With wet hair Louis skipped down the stairs, chirpy. He had slept next to Harry, made him uncomfortable in the morning, bonded with Payne (he’s less terrible than his first impression) and snogged Eleanor. Life was looking up. Once he bounced into the kitchen, a loud birthday bash was going on. He joined into a birthday song, though by the life of him he couldn’t remember whose birthday it was. 

He soon found out, when he saw the big pink birthday cake being placed in front of Harry. His cheeks were flushed, eyes dazed and a big Birthday banner was acting as his daily headband. _That’s cute. Damn my mind should stop spinning around this boy._ “It’s the Harry Potter cake,” Daisy beamed at his side. “You know because your name is Harry.” 

“I get it, thanks love.” Harry beamed at her at least as excited as Louis’ youngest sister. 

Fizzy outstretched her hand towards Harry, weaselling “open, open, open.” Harry’s long fingers carefully opened every tape so that he could reuse the paper later on. _God, what a saint Harry is._

He let out an honest honking laugh when he finally revealed the book, “what is it?” 

Harry met Louis eyes “a knock knock joke book.” 

Louis raised his eyebrows, “he practically says at least five a day.” Lottie lets him know as if he should have known about this already. Gemma had gotten her brother mascara and an eye-liner. Harry had the decency to blush at that, but he was more excited. Daisy and Phoebe had provided hands with the cake and Lottie (with Niall) had gotten Harry a Polaroid camera which he had wished for. Louis had the sneaking suspicion that his mum had given some money too, since Lottie was always strapped for cash. Anne and Robin had promised to take him shopping which is where they were heading right after they all had a piece of cake. 

Harry had just blown out the candles when with a smirk to Gemma, Louis and Harry’s sister used their vice grip on Harry’s neck and smashed him into the cake. Harry yelps and tries to steady himself, unconsciously gripping onto the junction of Louis’ hip to his leg. The families start hysterically laughing when Harry comes back up, cake all over his face, basically inhaling the cake. He was laughing himself. Des, Harry’s real dad, started taking pictures of his son covered in cake meanwhile Louis was still high-fiving Gemma. 

“What’s wrong with you?” Fizzy was standing in his door. 

“What?” 

“It’s his birthday, you put him through enough the past weeks and you didn’t get him anything.” 

“Oh come on, Fiz, I gave him a smashing birthday party. Besides, I didn’t put him through anything.” 

Fizzy snorted her usual annoyance “It was a footie party that he came home crying from.” 

“How you know?” 

“Good guess. Everyone knows he’s getting bullied, you think he wouldn’t get bullied at your stupid footie party?” She sat down next to him, “what happened last night?” 

“Nothing.” 

“He woke up in your bed.” 

“So he slept here, no biggie.” 

“Mhm. Keep pretending like it didn’t mean anything.” She stretched her tongue out and with a bounce in her step jogged off. Louis was just about to stand up to close the door when her face reappeared “you need to get him a gift if you want him back in your bed, you do know that right?” She gurgled a laugh at Louis’ pained expression. 

His sister might have had a point, which is how he ended up calling Zayn for advice. His best friend was currently buried deep inside his own girlfriend, so no reply. Niall wasn’t much help either since he was currently staring at Harry twirling in the changing room (Niall’s words not Louis’). “You could just give him a kiss, bet he’d love that.” Fizzy unhelpfully supplied, “bet you’d like that too.” 

“Shut it Fiz.” 

“You’re asking for help!” 

She kept feeding her Sim, “you want her to get fat?” Louis leaned over her shoulder to stare at the exhausted game figure in Louis’ image. 

“No, just puke uncontrollably to her death.” 

“You’re incredibly cruel.” Fizzy grinned over her shoulder. “Did you have to call her Louie?” 

“She looks like you of course I did, and it’s a challenge.” 

“What is?” 

“Finding as many creative ways to kill a Sim as possible.” 

Louis shakes his head in bewilderment “the worlds cruel.” Fizzy shrugs again, watching her Sim start to puke. “Is this your idea or did you see a suggestion on google?” 

She grins “you want to find out how terrible I truly am? Yes it’s my idea, and I am the queen of the underworld.” She outstretched her arms over her head falling back against the cushion satisfied and mischievous as ever. 

“Truly are, love.” 

“Better recognise.”

Harry came back with multiple bags of clothing, trimmed curls and bright rainbow coloured nail polish on his hands. His smile was brighter than Louis had seen him in days. Dimples popping sweetly. Niall, Gemma and Harry were still chatting away when Louis grabbed Harry’s hand pulling the reluctant boy with him. “Come on I got something to show you.” 

“Oh okay.” Harry said meekly, letting Louis tare him into a small nook behind the stairs. Louis held out his hand.

“Happy Birthday Curly.” Harry looked surprised taking the small package into his hands, it was the worst wrapping he’d ever seen. Just a small box that was lying flatly in Harry’s big hand. Instead of wrapping paper it was glued together by packaging tape. 

Harry’s lips curled up. “Lou? How do I open this?” 

“Oh. Right.” He grabbed a knife out of his sock and handed it over. “Did it meself, sorry. I suck at wrapping.” Harry snorted, but after he didn’t succeed with the knife, in fact it looked more like he was about to slice his hand open, Louis grabbed the knife from him along with the package. Violently he opened it with his tongue between his teeth. “Here.” He gave it back to the endeared Harry. He slowly opened the lid, it made Louis incredibly anxious. _Who is so fucking slow all the time?_ Louis was watching Harry’s face pass into surprise. “It was a gift from my grandmother. She brought it back from Turkey. It was meant to shy away the evil glare or something. Thought you might be able to use it.” 

Harry lifted the small bracelet out of the box “you re-gifted me a gift?” 

He sounded amused, but Louis got defensive, nonetheless, “No. It’s special, my grandparents don’t have the money to travel as much as yours, so this is special.” It was a lame defence. But Harry seemed to appreciate it.

“I like it. Thank you. Will you…?” Harry held out his hand. Louis nodded, grabbing the simple silver bracelet and clasping it around Harry’s agile hot skin. His thumb brushed his pulse point that made his own quicken. He thought about putting his lips there, taste his skin and let the intoxicating hot flesh bounce against his lips. To physically feel how he affected Styles himself.

“Thank you.” Harry got him back out of his thoughts. His Adams apple gulped visibly and _I suppose that’s all the conformation I need._

“Wait.” Louis rummaged through his back pockets. “Here it is…the evil eye is over 5’000 years old … in countless religions…bla bla bla….” Louis reads through his little note pad until he filters through the sappy things. Harry’s patiently waiting for him, smiling fondly with a frog expression at the nervous Louis. _Why am I so nervous, I’m the king of sass._ “It’s believed to stare back at the world with a watchful gaze to keep you safe from jealousy and harm…it’s there to protect and bless you, to feel safe.” Louis finishes with a loud huff, out of breath from his monologue. 

He finally looks back up at Harry, who reaches out to tug Louis into a hug. Louis has to go up on his tiptoes to curl into Harry’s long arms. He’s meet half way and both clutch to each other, finally being able to show how much they truly care for each other. Their heads are brought very close, and he can feel his own cheeks pressed into Harry’s neck, a low whisper finds his ear “Couldn’t ask for anything better, thank you, Lou!” 

“Happy Birthday, Haz.” Both leave the little new nicknames right there in the air, like they’re used to it, like it’s a usual occurrence between them. Finally, Louis claps him bro-like on the back and the two separate. 

When they emerge from the nook, Fizzy winks and makes a kissy-face at the same time over her tea cup. Louis throws his middle finger up, making her spit her tea into Daisy’s face. Her eyes are tinkling with amusement.

💚🍑💙

“A grade through the medium of Art. Leigh-Anne dear, how’s it going?” 

“It’s almost done Mam.” Leigh-Anne answered in her usual timid voice. 

“Do speak up, dear.” Before she could repeat her answer she moved on “Coursework of emotion and no room for stillness, Zayn my love this looks ecstatic, what is your chosen emotion.” 

Zayn, who had painted comic figures over comic figures much like in his shed, answered “ecstasy.” Their teacher Mrs. Horlyck raised her eyebrow unimpressed. Zayn Malik was her best student, yet he always drew whatever he wanted and never went along with the assignment. With the help of his newest friend, Louis, Zayn was able to come up with any title that would eventually fit to the assignment, making Mrs. Horlyck’s eyebrow meet her hairline every time. 

“Ah and here we have, Jade you have chosen envy I see…”

Jade pouted “its hope.” 

“…and I see happiness…” 

“…rage that is.” Another student complains.

“…and Louis…what do we have here?” She looked at Louis’ work, but his painting was bare. He usually took the class to catch up on his sleep. Sometimes Zayn would make a second painting that he would show off as his own. “No hint of a creative flowering then? Any gush of … well … anything?” 

“Not really…not yet.” Louis said sleepily. 

“I’d suggest unclogging that mind-freeze of yours and start concentrating on your work, you don’t want to repeat this year again, do you?” 

“Its stillness.” 

Horlyck stared at the naked painting, before going into her next rant unimpressed “Sixth form is arguably the most important time of your two years of college…” 

“Is this Mrs. Horlyck’s classroom?” 

“No. Dear this is Madame Horlyck’s studio and who are you sweet young thing?” The girl looked shocked, “I’m here to…” 

Zayn leaned over the canvas to stare down at Louis, who had buried his head back in his arms. “Heard you went on a date with Eleanor.” Louis grunted an affirmation. “Come on then spill.” 

“Was nice. She is funny.” 

Zayn gave him a look which made Louis sit up “you know how many people here wanna go out with her? And you think she’s funny?” 

“Fine. We went to that little Italian place, got pizza.” He didn’t mention that El had insisted on sharing a pizza to ensure she wouldn’t get fat and that Louis bum ‘was big enough as it was’. “We talked and she was funny. Then I drove her home, and she gave me a kiss.” 

Zayn smirked, “any good?” 

“BOYs BOYs BOYs!” Mrs Horlyck tusked over their heads “talk about your dating life in another classroom please.” 

“Preferably Cow-hells, at least then we’ll all have something to stay awake with.” 

A snicker went through the class and even the art teacher had to hide a grin behind her hand “nice one Ms Thrillwall.” 

Was the kiss nice? Louis had hopped out of the car (yes the Volvo finally arrived) after a nice dinner, sucking in his tummy in a vein attempt to hide it. Had opened her door and like a ballerina she had let him lift her out of the passenger seat by her hand. “Thanks,” he had said “to agreeing to this, I really did have a good time.” “Me too Tommo.” And just like that she had leaned forward and given him a pleasant kiss to his lips. It was short with little to no sound when they parted, no fireworks exploded behind his eyelids, no tickling in the base of his spine, just a simple kiss. “See you at school.” She had waltzed off, trying to sway her hips suggestively, but in all honesty, Louis felt pride in the knowledge _I do it better._ And who are you going to show that off to? He had heard a tiny mean voice in his head. He had shaken his head with a small smile and walked back to his car, giving El a last wave before driving off. 

“So how was it?” Jade turned around to face him just as Cow-hell had turned to face the board drawing some sort of diagram. 

“Dunno, she tastes like a frappé.” 

The girl next to Jade snickers “course she does as much as she drinks that shite.” 

“It wasn’t really long enough for anything to feel like anything.” Jade gave him a pointed look that said something along the lines of _you fucking with me?_ Before she had to return to face the teacher who had already started explaining the darn diagram. 

“Not very enthusiastic you are!” Zayn whispered.

Louis shrugged, “second dates after footie match on Friday. I’ll get you more details then.” Zayn clapped him on the back before returning to his doodling. 

Friday came around way to fast and Louis was standing on the pitch again. He was frustrated, he really wanted to show of to El how good he really was, but they were playing like idiots today. It still stood 0-0, when the team ran back into the locker rooms. He caught sight of Eleanor with her frappé who was giving him a thumbs up, but he was also looking for another curly-haired person in the crowd, who didn’t show up today.

Coach Winston had pursued to rip out his hair at the side lines during the game looked flustered. His words barely came out when he spat at them “What the fuck is going on? Your playing like a couple of girls.” 

“I think his hair is going white.” Niall whispered next to him. Louis had to hide a snicker in his jersey. Winston stared at them, but since Niall and Louis where technically the only ones trying to play football today he let them be. 

He stood up, making himself look taller than he actually was, in front of Ashton and Calum “You think it’s a great idea to go drinking before a game, do you? Look at the damn score board you toads! Puke at your own God damn time!” 

Louis was dribbling at the edge of the touch line. His feet shuffling into a forward run until he cares to halt, boost kicks the ball far into the air, flanking it. It ended in front of Niall’s feet, right outside the penalty box, and he scored. Louis rams his fists into the air and lets Niall manhandle him into a crushing hug onto the pitch. It’s 0-1 for the Cheshire Crusaders. From then on out they play a defensive game. Trying to stay high up on the pitch with a lot of passes, so that the other team can’t reach their goal, meanwhile letting themselves not score either. It’s a very German game and secretly Louis hates it. If he were an onlooker, he’d boo them for the boring game, thankfully they don’t. 

He hugs Eleanor and gives her a kiss to the cheekbones once the ref finally called it quits. “You ready for the second part of our date?” He’s a little giddy grunting a little from the extension just a moment ago.

“Second part?” Her small eyes roll in confusion.

“I’m counting this, love. You saw me play footie after all.” 

“You realise half the town is also on a date with you right?”

“Part of the fun innit? Yet I chose to go eat out with you lovey.” She’s giggling and Louis counts it a win.

“But first can you…well take a shower.”

Louis smells his armpit and grins “I smell musky, love.” She grins but squishes her nose to show him _you really are not._ Louis runs to the shower on the way he sees Niall close his bag. “You not taking a shower, you disgusting mug?”

“Barbs likes it.” Niall grins and gives him a playful wink. Louis pretends like he’s disgusted, scrunching up his nose like Eleanor like earlier, but both know that Niall won this round. 

Louis scurries into the shower and laves himself with shampoo quickly. Unconsciously his eyes drift to the right, where another teammate Josh Devine is currently rinsing off his body wash. It’s an unconscious thing, letting his eyes drift over his fit body. He’s not sporting a six-pack, but his peck do twitch and his flat tummy looks much better than Louis own slightly bulgy tummy. As a football player his thighs are hard and big as he’d expect. His eyes almost reach his cock, but he feels his own tummy tighten, and he knows what comes next. He quickly looks away, rinsing furiously to get out of there as quick as possible. He quickly gets dressed, he doesn’t want to face Josh. He’s so hasty that he forgets his boxers all together, but he only notices when he runs up to Eleanor running a hand through his wet fringe.

“You know what I really feel like doing?” Louis questions Eleanor while he’s still busy stuffing his face with fish and chips. “Taking a swim.” Eleanor laughs, she’s much more gentle to her chips, slowly placing it onto her tongue.

“Yeah me too,” her eyes twinkle mischievously. “You know that Ashton and the boys trespass onto a public pool sometimes.”

“Really? Right on lass! You’re a keeper aren’t ye?”

“I know where! Fancy it?” She says, ignoring Louis question. The two run into the Volvo and Eleanor gives him directions to the pool. 

They arrive at a big C shaped drive in, but Eleanor directs him around it. She makes him stop at a spot where the fencing is particular low. “Any of the mates going to be there?”

“Dunno. Let’s find out.” They climb out of Louis’ car and approach the fence. Louis climbs it up and lifts himself onto of the thick wall behind it. He helps El to do the same, they both take a breath when they are both straddling the wall. 

“What’s the use of a wall behind a fence, don’t it just invite us to climb it?”

“Apparently they wanted to put spiked wire on it. Think they ran out of money, though.” 

Louis nods towards the security cameras, “what about them?”

“Ah, those are just to fence us off. When Ash and the lads first crashed here, the pool put up those cameras as a warning. Took us about a month to get that they don’t actually film anything.” 

Louis nods thoughtfully, “no money, ey?”

“You’re getting it.” El whispers cheekily, leaning forward towards him. “You helping me down or what?” Louis jumps off of the wall, it’s not a far jump, but he can feel his ankle strain after a full footie match. He helps her down by holding on to her hips. They rush to the pool, which is rather small for a public pool, but Louis didn’t expect anything bigger of a Cheshire pool. Louis pulls off his shirt while running and toes of his shoes, his cloths are scattered over the grass. Finally, he pulls down his pants, realising he got no boxers on. _Oh well, let her see. I’ve got nothing to hide, it might not be long but it makes up for in girth._ Louis runs to the pool and _of course_ cannonballs into it. The chlorine hits him in the face, and he takes a huge gulp of it, while the rest rushes through his nostrils. He comes back up to stare at El.

“Go on then. Let me see you.”

“You think we’re there yet?”

“You just saw me cock, yes I think we are.” She’s snickering, and he is gulping down more water to spray it across the pool towards her. It might be the shared beers that frees Eleanor's mind to finally let the small, light blue dress drop from her delicate shoulders. She’s got a very slim and linear body with a tiny booty and her breast are small mosquito bites on her trained torso. She slithers into the pool, her leopard knickers still on her petite waist. They play around for a while, because quite honestly Louis just a big baby. 

Eleanor brushes into Louis, pushing him against the wall behind him. She kisses him, its warm and wet and tastes like fish and chips. He can’t say he hates it, warmth spreads through his body when she gets a hold of a half hard cock, which is still mentally in the locker room. It never really went down. He feels something drift up towards him. El has torn of her own knickers, which are now swimming around them. Eleanor’s warm mouth moves along his jaw.

Louis closes his eyes and lets his head fall against the pool. Eleanor is attacking his neck, giving him a few painful bites and pulls on his skin agonisingly hard. It’s not entirely comfortably nor uncomfortable. “Look at that gorgeous foreskin, it’s glistering around your red rigid cock, I’m pleasantly surprised, love.” She moves her thin fingers over his cock head, pushing his foreskin beneath his head, playing with the head. The water soothes the rough ministration. “Must make all those boys jealous in the locker room with that weapon between your thighs.” He knows it’s dirty talk suppose to rile him up, but it plays like a loop inside his head _all those boys in the locker room._ He grabs onto her bone-y hip and presses her between his thighs, but she keeps up her attention to his cock. _All those boys in the locker room._ “You like that baby, my hip near you?” _All those boys in the locker room._ “My pussy close to you?” _All the boys…_ “Too enticingly close…? _” All the boys…all the boys…boys…boys…boys…_ ”ahhhnhhg.” Louis comes hard into the water with perky bumps filtering behind his eyelids. 

El is giving him small kisses all over his face telling him how great he did. Louis grabs onto her hips harder and flips her around, his now flaccid cock rubs against her tiny bum. With his hand he holds her close to himself by his ribcage, careful not to touch her tits. His hand slowly move towards her pussy “look at that so wet for me filled a whole pool didn’t ye?” She barks a laugh at his lame joke. “You alright with this?” He asks her while teasing her inner thigh. She gives him a nod. He has had his fingers in his ex-girlfriend Hannah before and his finger had also been teasing inside Luke’s bum hole before. Two different sets of experiences he could work with. Both man and woman shiver and squirmed in pleasure similarly at the new welcomed intrusion. Both moaned, heads falling back though that of a man is lower than the girls high pitch. In a girl he played with her clit while with Luke he played with his cock. Both squirm. Again. One body he understood and one he did not. He keeps going playing with her, trying to keep up with Eleanor’s little tips and tricks to her own very specific body. Sooner than later she too comes and her body shivers slightly in the now coldish water. He holds her close, and she wiggles her bum against his interested cock, but they decide to rush out to get her home into her comfy bed.

Louis pulls up to Eleanor’s house just in time, while he comes hard down her throat. F _uck, a second time tonight_. It only started with a joke about getting road head. Louis was thankful for the few cars on a weekend in the dimly lit street of the town of Cheshire. It must be the curly hair that bunched up where he was holding on to her that got him going so hard. His car makes a suffocated grunt when the motor shuts off, he couldn’t get his car out of gear in time, too overwhelmed by the ministration. “Thanks love. This was great.” Louis tells her exasperated. He reaches for her and gives her a slobbish kiss. He can taste himself on her lips, and he pulls a face. 

She laughs at him “Sorry, Louis, won’t do that again.” She grabs a napkin to wipe her mouth. 

“You want me to? “

“No, next time. Don’t worry.” 

“So there’ll be a next time, right? We’re cracking on aren’t we?” 

“Yes Louis, I’m starting to like you love. See you in school.” 

💚🍑💙

Louis is still smiling when he arrives home, he feels giddy from his orgasms, and he won a game after all.“Your home early.” His mother says as she’s looking him up and down. “What happened here, boo?” She grabs his neck. _Right that’s the spot Eleanor was really harsh on me_. 

“Was on a date, mum.” He cheekily points at his neck “went well as you can see.” His mother gives him a pointed look.

“Why are you wet though?”

“Went swimming.”

“Swimming?”

“Yeah I’ll go grab a shower.” He runs upstairs and washes the day off. He’s very proud of himself at that moment. If things go so well with Eleanor, even their intimacy is going better then expected, _maybe this is something I can actually get invested in_. 

After getting his pyjama bottoms on and an old t-shirt, he runs downstairs to grab one last cuppa. His mum is sitting at the kitchen aisle with her own tea already in her hand. She’s watching him for a moment as Louis boils the water. He’s proud to say he makes the best cuppa, he’s a fucking magician that’s what he is! “So you went swimming?” She asks while Louis is rummaging through the tea drawer.

“Yupp.” He pops the ‘p’. 

“Where they didn’t have a shower?” 

“Mhm.” 

“On a date?” His mother is grinning wickedly.

“Mum, what is it?”

“Who with then?”

“Her name’s Eleanor.”

“Honey,” she says with a sigh. “I know Des has a pool love, you don’t have to pretend with me.”

“What you talking about, who’s Des?” Louis is clutching his Yorkshire tea in his hand, utterly confused by now.

“Harry’s dad of course. Harry’s at his dads house like every Friday. I wouldn’t say anything if you went to see Harry. I actually think it’s sweet.” 

Realisation daunts on Louis, “MUM Noooo…like…nooo.” He shakes his head furiously “I really went on a date with Eleanor. Eleanor Calder. She’s in me class. She’s lovely. Mum I’m dating Eleanor, not Harry.” 

“Oh ok.” She deflates a little, a frown appearing on her previously very cheery face. “So you’re dating a girl?”

“Yupp.” He watches her, the battle hisses behind him, and he grabs it to poor hot water into his mug. Slowly he places the tea bag into his water and watches it spread its colour into the water.

“I just…well…after seen you with Stan and Luke…I just assumed you’d date someone else is all.”

“Mum.” He takes her hand across the isle, standing on his tip toes to lounge across it. “I’m dating a girl, I always date girls. Remember Hannah, me ex?” 

“I know love. It’s just I…nevermind. Just stay honest with me alright? I’ll love you always. Alright?” 

“Course mum.” He kisses her knuckles and she smiles tired.

“Alright, I’m off.”

“What? Where?”

“Honey I quit at Dan’s. I told you this. I’m starting at the hospital now as a nurse.”

“Why?”

“Honey.” She tusks shaking her head, “you don’t listen, do you? The other nurses didn’t like working with the boss’s fiancee. So I switched to the hospital. Got me first night shift tonight. Wish me luck.” He holds up his twisted finger in luck, and she pulls a face to show her nerves and anticipation as she leaves.

💚🍑💙

In one of his free periods Louis heads to his spot to breathe some fresh air. Hidden behind a small open rotunda are the small theatre rooms. Two rooms side by side with large windows where the curtains are drawn. Louis sits down on the small stair and pulls out an overused cigarette pack. He leans his head against the wall and closes his eyes. He recently found out that right here he can hear the choir practice, something that calms him down endlessly. Louis lets the darker deep voices into his mind, soothing his wicked mind for a minute.“Tommo!” Louis opens his eyes and salutes Zayn in hopes he would just pass on. But he jumps down the stairs with Liam and Michael Clifford on his heels. “Nice little spot.”

“Yeah yeah.” Louis says still calmer than ever, even though the ruckus the boys are making are cancelling out the voices of the choir. Zayn lights himself a cigarette too “you know what your getting Eleanor for the special Day tomorrow?”

“Do I have to?” Louis can feel himself panic, damn he hadn’t thought of that. 

“Deffo. You’re dating her, you need to get her something.”

“Take her out on a date. Maybe you’ll get lucky, mate.” Michael says. Louis always thought Michael was the softest out of Ashton’s bullying clique, and he found his presence surprisingly nice.

“Everything will be booked out by now.” 

“Alright” Louis challenges “what you doing then, Mr Prepared?” 

“I’m taking her out into the town. Nice little rendezvous.” And of course Liam would use a term like rendezvous. Louis rolls his eyes again. “Also I’m getting Harry a gift card.”

“Wait, why?” Louis is confused.

“He hooked me and Danielle up. Introduced us to each other, so I say thank you with a gift card on same day every year. Danielle picks them out cuz I got no idea what Harry could like or what stores he goes to.” 

The doors underneath them opens and a Newcastle accent of the student councillor travels up to them “boys do you mind moving along, can barely hear our own voices in here.” 

Liam sits up and brushes his jeans like he’s willing away unseen crumps. “Sure thing Mrs Cole.” 

“Sorry Mrs Cole.” Michael echoes and they all get up. _That’s it for my secret hideaway_. Michael is whispering to Liam “she’s tight fit that Mrs Cole.” 

Meanwhile, Zayn is leaning over to Louis “I'm taking Perrie out, we could double date if you’d want.”

“Sounds great but you sure that’s okay with Perrie?” 

Zayn shrugs “Dunno but’ll be much more fun with you around. Don’t have to go through all that sappy shit on our own yeah?” He shoves Louis, and he laughs even if he likes the sappy shit. He’d love to be romantic for the right person, and he’s damn sure for the right one he’d have no problem coming up with ideas. His mind goes back to Liam’s comments, and he just wanders, _should I?_

Louis comes home when his mother is watching a re-run of Desperate Housewives on the big telly with Anne and Gemma. Their mostly talking through it as Anne is ironing some shirts while watching. He stops in his sweaty football geared tracks when he sees the gardener gift Eva Longoria _one perfect rose_. 

💚🍑💙

On the second week of February is the most dreaded day for any boy. Louis hates it for one particular reason, why does no get a gift for the boy? He drives his oldest sisters and the Styles siblings to school with a rose in his rucksack. 

In first period he asks for permission to leave for the bathroom. He rushes to his locker gets out the one rose still in a small beige packaging with its note. In a rush not to be seen, he dashes to Harry’s locker and with super sticky tape he tapes it to the front, because Harry uses a lock, and he can’t put it inside. _A perfect rose for the perfect dimples_. It read with two xx at the end and because he thought it was too flirty, he drew a small line beneath it to make it into a smiley. He quickly got back to class with a dopey smile. He just hoped Harry didn’t get too much shit for it. 

At some point the Choir burst into his maths class, just as he was loosing a silent hang man round to Jade, who was way too cheeky about it. “Sorry, this is for Jade.” They start singing some cheesy romantic song. Louis hears a dark husky voice and looks up. His entire face was blushing and hiding behind one of the other students, Tom Fletcher. But Louis could see his curly hair from anywhere. 

“That was cute, who was it from?” Jade asks Tom.

“Secret Admirer-ess.” He lifts an eyebrow. “Hah, that’s all it says. Sorry.”

“No, thanks guys.” They hurriedly leave, the embarrassment taking a hold of them. Louis grins at Harry, who had a quick look over his shoulder and sends him a wink. That makes Harry blush all the way to his quite tiny ears. 

“Having luck with the girls, are we?” He laughs at Jade. But she just stretches her tongue out at him.

“More than you, love.” She giggles.

“Oi I’m going on a date with Eleanor.” He writes an H to their hangman game, but Jade adds another arm to his stick figure. That leaves one try to go, _I’m so fucked._ “Why do they do that? The choir?”

“It’s how they earn a bit of cash to go on their little trip for the singing competition thing.”

“Didn’t know they do that.”

“It’s quite cool. I went as a spectator last year cuz it was me friends, Jesy’s, last year at school. It’s nice, they practice for it all year around.” Louis hums and absent-mindedly adds a J to which he loses the game.

“Pretty sure you’re cheating Thrillwall.” She grins proudly, writing ‘queen of hangman’ on the top.

After school, he drives Eleanor, Zayn and Perrie to go to the fair a town over. Zayn shoots Perrie a big white teddy bear, which turns out to be her valentines present. Judging by her clutching it to her chest the rest of the day she likes it. They take a few pictures in a booth, everyone picks their favourite, and they cut them so that they can put them in their respective wallets. They ride the big ferries wheel and kiss at the top. Perries freshly purple dew is a right in front of Eleanor and Louis faces. But Louis quite likes it, it’s her way of being unique. 

Later they sit at the end of the pier smoking Zayn’s joint and giggling into each other’s faces. “Did you hear that Liam took Danielle to Manchester?”

“Really? That’s quite serious, he’s not proposing or something?” 

“Nah. He’d never.” Zayn pulls strongly on his blunt.

“You sure?” Louis taunts, “he’s all proper and sorts. I guess it depends on how long they’ve been dating.” 

The girls giggle, “seriously hope not.”Perrie lifts the bear to her lips, “she got accepted into the dance academy in London next year, you know the one that she really wanted to get into. They might just be celebrating. Don’t think she wants to bind herself to Cheshire.”

“Well that’s happy talk.” Louis grunts, “El you ready for the real surprise?”

She smiles broadly, “this ain’t the surprise?”

“Who you take me for? ‘Course not.” 

Louis grabs El’s hand for her present. A little picnic basket slung in their hand they find a quiet spot near the beach. The sun already went down quite a bit which is why Louis lights the small candles he brought with him, burying them into the sand. “Thanks Louis this is very romantic.” 

Louis beams at her. “Well you’re just lucky our third date happened to be on Valentine’s Day.” 

“Third date already? You think I’ll put out?” 

“There is a case to be made this is the fourth.”

“How’d you gather that then?” 

He takes her finger and kisses one with every count “Italian Dinner.” She giggles. “The pool, which way too hot by the way.” She blushes. “The ferries’ wheel. Double dating, very mature of me I think.” She laughs loudly. “And this, romantic picnic at the beach.” She kisses him, and they snog for a bit, she’s leaning all over him and he nestles back against the picnic blanket. A chilly wind rushes around them, and he gets goosebumps along his legs, he opens his mouth to let her in. Her tongue glides alongside his and it feels good to be so close to another person again. It might be the best aspect between him and Eleanor. In Dony he had Luke and Stan and here that doesn’t seem to manifest. Her hands lace down her body, grabbing at his sides. He knows that she doesn’t like his thick thighs nor his fat bum nor his tummy, but right now she quickly finds his bulge. Only issue is he’s completely flaccid. 

“Oh,” she sits up on her elbows. She sounds offended “What’s going on?”

“Might be the weed.” Louis says, _might be you,_ is what he doesn’t say.

“Okay,” she sounds a little more at peace. “How can I help?”

“I don’t know. Maybe…you could.” He looks down at himself. 

“You want me to give you head again?” He nods a little embarrassed. 

“This hasn’t happened before,” _I swear it hasn’t._ She opened his pants and swiftly pulls them down. Just so his bum and cock are free, she opens her mouth and pulls his soft dick into her mouth. She slowly starts to suck and play with his balls. Louis grabs her hair again balling it up. 

Eleanor pulls off “Honestly Louis, my hair dew, you’re ruining it.”

“Just really like to feel your curls.” He answers, and his cock fills a little. She raises her eyebrows but doesn't seem to mind, due to the turn of events. She goes back to it ,and Louis leans back on the beach, his hands scrunching curls in his hands and his eyes closed, he lets his long time wank bank return. Slowly the memory returns, coming into colour before him, _“Oops.” The boy next to his urinal says._

_“Hi.” Louis laughs, walking over to wash his hands._

_“So sorry.” The boy says, he’s got the nicest squirmy body and pink lips, Louis can’t tell if he’s wearing lipstick or not?_

_“That’s alright, mate. No need to get so flustered.” He blushes from his chest to the tips of his very curly hair. The green eyes are staring at his lips, and Louis decides to surge forward. Grabbing the boys neck, he crushes their lips together. He vaguely tastes popcorn, as he pushes him against the wall opposite them. His pillowy lips rub against his, slowly he opens his mouth and the boys lips follow. Louis lets his tongues slide right in-between the puffy pillows. As their tongues meet, the boy moans loudly. Louis proudly smiles into his kiss. There is no fight, no resistance, the green-eyed boy simply lets him slide his tongue over his, around his, Louis has all control._

God, he loved it _._

_He, too, groans as he lets himself fall against the boy, who squeals slightly. His hard cock is rubbing against Louis thigh. Their lips detach. He carefully feels the boy’s penis, a hard rod in his blue jeans, it’s quite big. He grins as the boys mouth opens obscenely. But he has an issue of his own. Slowly his hands detach from him and opens the button to his own pants. Green follows his movements as he pushes his pants down and his boxers just so that his balls are freed, his pants stretching around his thighs. He vaguely hears a song starting outside, one that he loves, but this is better. Louis threads his hand into the curls as he pushes the other boy to the ground. A dull thud rings to his ears as he falls to his knees. Green eyes are blown wide as he stares at Louis girth, “c’mon.” The boy gives it a tentative lick first and Louis groans. His lips surround his cock, and he sucks lightly, then Louis has had enough. He grabs the curls by both hands and slowly pushes more and more of himself into the boys mouth. His lips staying beautifully puffy as they stretch and stretch around him._ Eleanor hums around Louis full on boner.

With a loud pop she flops off, leaning over to kiss him. He quickly takes control and turns them, he grabs for the condom and quickly gets it over his cock, letting its lubrication do the rest of the work. Meanwhile Eleanor is squirming underneath him to free her knickers down her legs. As quick as he can he lies on top of her again. Their mostly dressed still, but Louis needs to feel her around him again. He slowly slips in and he can hear her moan, grabbing onto his shoulder so hold on. He goes back into his mind as he moans against her clothed shoulder. _Green eyes stare up at him, his hands awkwardly grab at Louis’ thighs as he braces for more. That’s all the confirmation Louis needs, slowly he starts to push in and out of the boys gaping mouth. Bottoming out, his balls push against the boys chin. His lips are a thin line now, Louis feels tight walls widening and tightening around the tip of his cock, and he realises the boy has a gag reflex. Tauntingly he pushes in just the last millimetre and the boy coughs around his cock, but keeps him steady situated inside his throat by pushing Louis’ thighs towards himself. Louis watches in awe as the green eyes fill with tears. He lets go off him, spit gushes down his chin and green eyes close as he breaths in harshly. He gives him a few hard retching breaths, before proceeding and pushes back in. Again the throat reacts to its intrusion and a few tears spill down from green meadowy eyes. Louis closes his eyes as he grabs onto their shoulders, pushing the curly lad into his cock he comes down his throat. Leaning over the boy, he tries to regain his breathing, just to realise that the boy must be choking._

Somewhere he realises Eleanor is grabbing onto his bum harshly, running another hand up and down his back as he relentlessly pushes in and out of her.

_He releases him, spit and cum flies to the floor as the boy tries to regain a steady breath. He tugs himself back in as he watches the curly haired boy, then he helps him back to his wobbly feet. The boy looks obscene. His eyes glassy and pupils blown wide, cheeks flushed red, lips swollen and now even his hair reaches for the sky. Louis would have laughed, but the boy looks so beautiful he repositions his lips on him. Again he tries to take his time, though the boy is grabbing for his biceps to get on with it. Louis leisurely touches his cock again, still hard and twitching where it had been just a few minutes before. He doesn’t take the time to actually take his cock out, Louis simply massages the aching limb over its blue jeans. Earlier green eyes had been all quiet groans and appreciations, but now he was a quivering loud mess. Louis lifts his lips amused, “al’right there sweet chumps?” But his eyes are closed as an incoherent “nnghh” that marks his release._

Without warning, Louis fills his condom. He just hopes he didn’t scream Harry’s name, he lets the aftershock wave through him with his last memory of the night he met Harry Styles. _Breathing heavily the boy slowly opens his eyes. Louis grabs some toilet paper from one of the stalls and pushes into the boys hand. “Thanks,” his hoarse voice whispers meekly as he opens his pants to clean up. “Nah, darlin, Thank you.” Louis gives him a short peck before swaying out of the bathroom. This concert was definitely worth every penny he paid._

“Louis, you’re quite heavy love.” Eleanor brings him back to the present. 

“Sorry.” He leans up on his elbows, “you come?” She smiles a shit eating grin that screams yes and relieved Louis pulls out to collapse next to her. He quickly grabs the condom and flicks it somewhere on the beach. 

Puling his pants back up, Eleanor mewls “Eww…Lou.” Louis laughs and just pushes her on top of him, grabbing onto the blanket to cover them cuddling. She is bone-y and slim and feels like holding on to a tree, but her head is heavy and blocks most of his view with brown hair. He nuzzles into it, a melon smell filtering to his nose.

💚🍑💙

He is woken by a very annoying stupid bird or seagull, who the fuck knows anyway. He’s still fully sated from last night, which might or might not be why he’s not sporting any morning wood. A ringtone filters through the morning air and Eleanor scrambles to her handbag. “Schools in like 90 minutes.” 

“Shit.” Louis looks over at her and smiles “hey.”

“Hi.” They lean in for a quick kiss, before they pack up. Louis runs around looking for his condom to get rid of it in the next bin. Eleanor seems relieved when he does so.

“Just come in.” She says in front of her own house. “My parents wake up like in an hour, so they won’t see you.” Which is how he ends up in her shower, no funny business happens, though. He quickly gets his uniform out of his boot where he left them yesterday. 

“Hey mum.” 

“Where are you, love?”

“Went on a date. It was Valentine’s Day.”

“Yeah well I think there needs to be a rule about school nights boo.” She sighs, “Anne was incredibly worried, lovey. She thought you were gone.”

“I texted you mum.”

“I was on me night shift I didn’t see it till one in the morning. Anne almost called the coppers.”

“I don’t know what else to do, though.” 

“Text your sister next time! And no more dates on school nights.”

“Fine.” He huffs. “What about you, though? How was your Valentines?” 

“The girls made us a romantic dinner and Harry cooked, double dating is fun honey.” 

“Yeah I know.” Louis giggles. “Mum I got to go, driving to school now.”

“Yeah alright.” She’s shuffling something before adding “there is a present on your bed by the way. Just in case you decide to come home today!” And she hangs up. Louis stares at this phone for a while, until Eleanor quickly comes up to his Volvo balancing two coffee in her hand. Louis leans forward over the centre console to push open the door for her. 

“You run a Starbucks or something?” 

She pokes her tongue at him “Just regular coffee, babe.” On their way to school, they play fight over the radio station until they settle on BBC 1. As soon as Louis has shut off the engine and pulled the parking brake, Eleanor grabs his hand, intertwining them gently. “Last night was beautiful Louis.”

“Yeah I thought so too.” He doesn’t even feel guilt for not being actually present in the moment with her, it’s just what he does. 

“Louis, don’t you want to ask me something?” She asks hopeful, glee in her bright eyes.

“Dunno…you look gorgeous today?!” He tries lamely.

She laughs happily, “Louis are we together or are we still dating?”

“Ah!” Louis leans over to look her in the uncharacteristically shy face, “wanna be me girlfriend gorgeous?” She nods and snickers into the kiss he gives her.

Lottie catches up to him at his locker and smiles as she hands him his dress shirt for uniform. Louis quickly takes it “Thanks, you’re a life safer.”

“Yeah Yeah, I know.” They walk towards the boys toilet “how was it then?” 

“Great. Real good actually.”

“You shagged then?” He gives her a pointed look and slips into the bog, where his sister can’t follow him. He buttons the shirt, adjusts his tie and flips his fringe. Lottie is still waiting and catches up to him when he passes her on his way to maths class. _Why does he have maths every day anyway?_ “You didn’t answer my question!”

“Why do you care?”

“Because for some reason Fiz seams to believe that Harry’s Valentines rose was from you.”

“She’s lost the plot.” He whispers back like it’s a secret between the siblings.

“Is she right?” Louis comes to a halt outside of class.

“Why did he get shit from anyone for it?”

“No. Well maybe a little from Gemma, but I guess I’d do the same to you if someone got you a rose.” She shrugs looking behind his shoulder to stare at a kid that’s quickly copying his friends homework. She rolls her eyes to look back at Louis. “I saw the note. I’d recognise your ugly handwriting anywhere!” 

“Yeah maybe I did.” He looks down at his feet. “Everyone deserves a rose on Valentine’s Day.” 

“You give Eleanor a rose? One perfect rose?” She’s mocking his note but looks slightly concerned while doing it.

He shakes his head with a pout. He turns on his feet and screams over his shoulder “she’s me girlfriend now!” He doesn’t look over his shoulder to look at Lottie’s reaction when he slips in next to Jade, who excitedly tells him about a new game she found they can play under the table.

“You find your present then?” His mother is leaning against the door frame in his room still dressed in her nurses outfit. Louis looks up and there is a beaming smile on his face. In his hand he is cradling a massive sunflower.

“Yeah.” He whispers stroking the pedals.

“Look at that someone has made me son speechless.” She gives a kind laugh. “Sunflowers are still your favourite right?” She tries to sound nonchalant, trying not to give away the boy that is standing against the wall right next to her, unseen to Louis.

“Definitely.” Louis reveals. Harry is snickering into his hand, and Jay gives him a small thumbs up. She hands Louis a vase, where her son carefully places the sunflower into. Still smiling he opened the tiny letter that had fallen on the floor. _A sunflower for the sunniest smile._ No name was attached, but Louis could guess that it was from Harry, since it was in the same style as his own note. “I love this.” He whispers as he puts his present on the windowsill so it can get some sun. The boy got a gift after all.

💚🍑💙

“Why are we in here? Ain’t the film starting elsewhere?” Jade complains, and Louis can understand her frustration. Her back is rammed right up against the doorknob of the toilet they’re currently occupying. 

“Shhh…we don’t need to pull attention to ourselves.” Perrie whispers to her best friend.

“Yeah cause a bunch of teenagers stuck in a toilet is very inconspicuous.” Louis grunts giggly. Making the girl next to him snicker too. It’s the first time he’s really hanging out with Jade and Perrie’s friend Jesy. She graduated last year, and she still lives in the area, because she had to go to University in Manchester, something to do with a violent police record or something. But standing next to her he couldn’t for the life of him understand it. She ain't got a violent bone in her body. 

“What’s taking so long Zaynie?” She asks the one that everyone is standing around. Zayn rolls his eyes and holds up a joint. They let it go around ones, before Zayn is grabbing something else in his jean pockets. Holding up a small packet with white powder in it.

“You mad? No way!” Perrie screeches. 

“It’ll be fun.” Zayn argues.

“In a film theatre? Where’s the fun in that? You got to do it at a party or a club man!” Jesy is shaking her head at him. Perrie had enough and runs out of the toilet, squeezing past Jade who runs after her. 

“Not really my thing either. Come on Louis don’t want to miss the film.” Eleanor pipes up and leaves as well. Louis can hear her wash her hands outside the stall. He appreciates that about his new girlfriend, her propriety.

“Sorry pal. Never done it before.” Louis argues. 

“First try?” Zayn asks while he makes a line for himself on the toilet seat. 

“Nah thanks.”

He, too, exits the bathroom and joins the girls at the popcorn stand. He can feel his high coming on and decides on nachos _and_ popcorn _and_ even gets a bit of chocolate chip mint ice cream. Giggling into the popcorn Eleanor sits down next to him to watch _The Inbetweeners_. 

Watching a film high is very different experience for Louis, they giggle so hard that the other people keep shushing them. At some point Zayn finally comes in and squeezes in between Louis and Perrie. He tries to take her hand, but she whispers, more like shouts, _hey who can blame her she’s high_ , “hate it when you take that shit!” 

“Baby come on. I’m high. You’re high. Let’s just enjoy it together.” 

Louis can see him grab her hand, but she chugs him off “hate it when you're like this.” 

Zayn doesn’t answer just steals her popcorn and punches one after the other into his mouth. Louis reminds himself he’s his friend when his mind tries to challenge Zayn that he didn’t even pay for the food he’s eating right now!

After the film, they decide on a pub that’s right around the corner. The high has almost deflated completely, and the girls are ahead of the boys. Louis and Zayn both silently light a cigarette next to each other. “So you and El is going good?”

“Yeah it’s fine.” 

“Don’t want to intrude, or anything, but you don’t necessarily sound too happy about it.”

Louis goes frigid and stares at Zayn. He tells the girls to pick a table inside, while they finish their smoke. Louis leans back against the wall and stares at Zayn mischievously “what about you lad? Looks like you and Perrie need some help mate.”

Zayn shrugs uninterested, “she just needs time to think.”

“Sounds like she wants you to stop using so many drugs, mate.” Zayn turns on him, his eyes are red from everything he’s been pumping into his blood the last two hours.

“Don’t care what she wants. She wanted me to stop being shy, so I took drugs to be more outgoing. Got some more friends for her too and now she wants me to just delete all that. She ain’t got a voice in this any more. She can’t have both ways mate. Don’t ever take her side!” He warns Louis and stumbles into the pub. Louis surveyed the empty street before squishing the bud under his vans shoes and follows him.

The night gets a little disastrous. Zayn and Louis get rather drunk after having their sort-of fight and Jesy and Jade sing a rather awful version of karaoke without a karaoke machine. When Zayn and Perrie start fighting just after last call, Eleanor and Louis spend the remainder of the next ten seconds trying to pry them away from each other before they both get kicked out for good. Drunkenly they walk the half-hour home, while Zayn and Perrie spit fire at each other. 

Exhausted Louis and Eleanor fall into Louis bed at the Styles residence. They stare at each other in the dark of the room and start giggling. Louis throws his head back and the laughter bubbles through him like the lava of a volcano. He clutches his tummy and has to control his breathing before he stops breathing altogether from having to keel over so hard. El takes his hand and they slowly calm down. With a goodnight kiss and an hour of staring into each other’s eyes they idly fall asleep.

Louis scooted out of bed, gabbing a jumper he walks down to the kitchen on a very sunny Sunday afternoon. Thankfully he didn’t pass anyone else, he rubs his eyes and sees Harry in the kitchen. He’s stuffing something into his mouth from the fridge when he locks eyes with Louis. “Morning love,” Louis grins. Harry walks back to his salad and continues preparing it. Louis watches him while Louis grabs the milk and drinks directly from the carton. 

Harry’s dainty fingers pour the tomatoes into his salad, and he starts mixing the bowl with his head in concentration. He grabs two leaves of salad with the tips of his ringed up fingers to taste the dressing. His tongue pokes out adorably before he completely stuffs it into his mouth. His face makes a little shake before he adds more of something, Louis really doesn’t care what he adds. 

Harry stops to look up, finally noticing being watched, he points towards him “that’s gross!” Louis looks at the milk and takes another swig with a smug look, noticing that Harry’s pointed finger was still covered in dressing. Louis puts the milk back in the fridge and grabs a water bottle. Still having Harry’s attention he approaches him, he just looks so soft and mushy, grabbing him by his waist he turns, the lanky tall boy around towards him. His face looks weird, shocked but cute. His right hand cups the back of Harry’s head and pulls him towards himself. Harry’s lips are as puffy as he remembers, soft yet strong. From the salad he still tastes like salt and vinegar. After a second Harry kisses him back, dropping his head a little to slant their lips together better. A tingling grows through his entire body, stirs his slacks, letting a deep ramble flitter through his muscle. _Maybe those are the fireworks everyone is talking about._ And all of that from just one kiss. Louis lets his lips go, making a tiny smack sound. He grins when he realises that Harry has to bend down to meet his lips, that his eyes are closed and his face is in bliss. Because he’s a bit cocky, he goes lifts onto his tiptoes to sneak another short smack to the lips, bumping their noses together slightly as the force of the kiss pushes Curly’s head back a little. Harry’s lips are addictive. Harry whines when their lips detach again, the sleek sound of a wet kiss filling the room.

“See you around love” he grabs the water bottle and walks back out of the kitchen, giving Harry a little sway of the hips, he knows his best asset is his bum. Walking up the stairs he realises that he’s completely hard, G _od Harry! Those God damn lips!_ He runs back upstairs, gets back into his room and pushes his pants off. Slipping under the covers he wakes El. She giggles from the attention. He doesn’t care, slips on a condom and slides into her with ease. He blanks out her moans and thinks of addicting lips and a low churning voice and a high-pitched moan. Maybe even of greasy fingers all over him, slipping on his love-handles. When he comes, he realises that Harry must hear them from the other side of the wall. For good measure he rams his bed against the wall a couple more times, ignoring the annoyed look on El’s face from the overstimulation. He can’t help but think that Harry would probably simply shiver from his bliss rather than get annoyed at Louis’ intent.

💚🍑💙

“Why did you bring her around Louis?” 

“She’s me girlfriend mum! We got drunk at the pub with the others…and then there was this hideous fight between Zayn and Perrie.” He rushes out the words, before his mother can interrupt him again. “It was menis, mum. Serious! Didn’t want El walking home alone, so I just invited her in.”

“We are here on invitation, Louis! You don’t actually think that you can bring girls around here!” Her voice was screeching higher. “Besides did you ever care to think about Anne, who let me live here with the bus load of kids I have? It was rude Louis and don’t think that it wasn’t!” 

“I don’t get why you're this upset about it?!” Louis brushes his wet fringe, he just stepped out of his shower when his mother rounded him in the bathroom, hounding him over having El over the night before.

“Well get this young man. You’re grounded.”

“What? For what for Christ’s sake?” 

“Don’t you dare swear in here.” She towers over him. “You’re grounded and you’re staying grounded until you and Dan have finished that bloody playground for your sisters in that new house we have! You get that?” 

“You’re being unreasonable! Completely fucking insane.” 

“Watch it, Louis,” her voice gets dangerously low and her nose scrunches to a scary extent “don’t stomp on my patients further. You’re sailing perilously against the wind. Now get your lazy arse to school!” Louis stomps his foot like a toddler and throws open the bathroom door. Smashing it shut right behind him. 

He catches a view of Harry, he’s reminded that it’s ‘wear your own cloths at school Friday’. Harry’s stuck in black tight pants, his hair is loose at his sides, and he’s wearing a colourful beige shirt with black elephants print or something. His shirt is open to reveal his fit torso and a necklace of a cross is lingering between the two pinkish nipples. He looks beautiful and very extravagant. But Louis is mad and his blood is boiling. 

He sorts past the boy and with a dark twisted gut he calls out “You look like a fag.” Harry’s face falls behind his head and the door slams behind Louis. He puts on some tight jeans and a simple black hoodie. 

He grabs his rucksack and jean jacket before rushing downstairs. “Everyone in the car.” He bellows into the kitchen. Anne says something about checking on Harry’s whereabouts, while Fizzy and Lottie scramble into his backseat and Gemma takes the passenger like always. “Where’s your brother.”

“Dunno. He’s usually early.” They see Anne approach who must have had the same idea. Quietly she whispers something into Gemma’s ear. The girls’ expression turns to worry. 

“Should I check on him?”

“No love. I got this.”

“Where is he then?” Louis asks annoyed, his blood is slowly turning colder. Very slowly. 

“He’s feeling a little under the weather. Why don’t you head out without him!” Louis meets her eyes and his stomach sinks. What did I say to him this morning? Louis was so angry he can’t even remember their encounter properly. 

He doesn’t listen to the girl’s talk and rakes his mind for the memory that-is too hazy to decipher. It keeps running in his mind. Harry in his weirdly handsome get up by his door staring at his fuming small form. _But what did I say?_

The rest of the day at school he tries to conjure up the memory. He misses Eleanor’s obvious flirting or demand of attention for wearing an absolutely to short skirt. He doesn’t banter with Liam about his stupidity and in art he accidentally paints a picture on his white stillness piece. “Ah Louis, looks like you found an inspiration after all and at the right time too.” Madame Horlyck tells him. “What are you portraying then?”

“What?” Louis just managed to understand someone talking to him. 

“Your assignment is due today, sweetheart, and I need to log down your piece’s emotion to grade it love. So tell me.” She says rather patiently. She has the amid ability to detect students vulnerabilities and when to be gentle with the youth.

“Confusion inside of anger.” He says blindly. He hasn’t even taken the time to stare at his piece. Just articulates his current state of mind. 

“Very good dear.” She jots it down and walks over to Zayn who is giving him a weird look. One that Louis is too tired to decipher. They haven’t spoken since the pub night on Sunday. Louis isn’t in the mood to apologise, and he feels that Zayn should apologise to him, but he can’t bring up the strength to demand that from his best friend.

Louis finds Liam leaning, like a tosser, against his locker. He approaches him, hooks a foot under his and pulls his foot away. He falls flat on his bum “serves you right for leaning like complete tart like that.”

“Tomlinson! Cheerful as ever.” The girl who had been talking to him snickers. 

“Here” Louis throws him the keys off the Volvo. “Drive it to footie practice, yeah?”

“Why? How are you getting there?” 

“I’m gonna run mate.” He says nonchalantly and watches the girl help Liam back up on his feet. Louis doesn’t move a muscle to help. 

“Why should I help you?”

“So you ain’t looking like a tosser on a pink scooter holding onto ye girlfriend like a rag.” With his mean words he turns and leaves. He doesn’t know why he knows Liam will do as asked, maybe he’s an ‘okay’ lad after all. 

Next, he finds his sister, Lottie with four of her friends. He’s not entirely sorry to say that he hasn’t taken the time to learn their names. “Oi!” Lottie turns to loom at him, detaching from the group a little. “Need you to do me a solid.” She just raises a carefully plugged eyebrow at him. “Find out what I said to Harry this mornin please.” 

“What you said?”

“Yeah, can’t remember really, and he might be upset because of that.”

“Ye serious Louis? That why he didn’t show up to classes today, ‘cause of you?”

“That’s what I need you to figure out love.”

He runs to practice. It’s raining and his cloths are heavy, hanging from him like tired rags. His quiff is a mess and his rucksack is banging against his back relentlessly. It refreshes him though. He realises that his mum might have had a point this morning. And he understands that she was upset, but grounding him for how God knows how long is really unfair. Nonetheless, once he arrives at the changing room, he quickly types out an ‘I’m sorry’ to his mother. 

When he comes home his mother is putting a few boxes into his room. “In case you need to pack anything. I know you’re a slob.” She says it teasingly and Louis falls into her embrace thankful for her forgiveness. “Ah and Louis…you're still grounded.” 

“Making friend left and right, aren’t we?” Lottie asks holding up Louis football jersey and throwing it at his head. Louis unceremoniously tosses it into a box. Lottie watches him pack for a second before sitting down on his bed. “Can’t wait to get me own room finally!” Louis smiles at her, living in a big family always meant that some had to share rooms. Through Dan and his dream house they’d all be getting their own rooms. Except for the twins who didn’t even dare to think about splitting up without a shiver going through them. One of them would probably get Louis room once he’d be off to Uni. “I found out what you wanted me to find out.” Louis perked up. 

“Harry?” She nodded thoughtfully. “And…?”

“You told Harry he looked gay or something. I don’t know your exact wording, but you really hurt him. He’s been crying non-stop since this morning!” She watched him through slitted eyes. “He’s someone who tries to express himself through his clothes and you literally told him he looked awful. How horrible are ye to him? What the fuck has he done to you to get ye so railed up all the time?”

Louis doesn’t even know how to answer that, and he looks sad when he finally meats his sisters eyes. “If I said that then I never meant it! I was mad at mum, and he was just there and I dunno... I’m sorry.”

“Don’t tell me! Tell him!” 

But Louis never gets the chance to. He tries getting into Harry’s room, but he has locked it and when Louis hears sniffling behind it, he tries knocking and calling his name softly. The door never opens. Gemma tells him to leave her brother alone when Louis tries brining him a tray of dinner. 

At midnight, Louis sneaks out of his window to snog Eleanor against a fence but it barely helps him lift his mood. 

The last day at the Styles residence Louis packs his last things together and at night sneaks a blunt with Zayn, who apologises for being a dick. They giggle behind the same fence that he snogged Eleanor and the neighbour sticks his incredibly large nose through the bushes to stare at the nuisances of teenagers. Louis rushes home before the neighbour can snitch on him and almost misses Harry’s lanky shadow behind his window. 

Fizzy and Lottie are watching another Disney film with the twins on their laps while the grown-ups are having their last wine night together downstairs. He pushes up against Fiz and gets half of Phoebe into his lap. Silently they watch for a couple of minutes while the only thing rippling through the air is a high pitch Disney princess singing and Lottie absent-mindedly tying Daisy’s hair into a braid. “I need a favour“ he whispers to Fizzy, and they both get violently shushed by the twins. Louis rolls his eyes and looks at a very uninterested Fizzy. “You know that shop where you get all your blouses from?” She nods. “I need a name.”

“Argh Louis.” He gives her an eye roll, and she takes his phone to write the address into Google Maps. 

“Mum’ll kill you if you violate her restraining order.” Fizzy says. Louis giggles at the joke, but quickly forms a key over his mouth locks and throws it away. Phoebe looks happy and turns her attention back to the damsel in distress on the screen. 

Harry doesn’t join the goodbye party in the driveway the next day, but his mother tells him that he said goodbye privately to her when Louis was still trying to get out of bed. Everyone hugged and off they were. Louis’ new room was quite big, bigger than his Doncaster room, but smaller than the Styles guest room. He had a black bed in the corner, a white cupboard and a useless desk. His mother made him unpack, but Louis found to his delight that he could escape his room over the winter garden, bouncing off of the vines into the garden itself. He shuffled along the hedges, careful not to be seen by the large kitchen windows, where mum and Dan were kissing, _ewww_. He took the squeaky fence door in the back of the house. _Self reminder not to open that door again_ , he could easily jump it, especially if he’d place a large rock next to it. 

The Volvo was parked on the curb on the street far away enough from the main door not to be noticed. Illegally balancing the phone on his lap he quickly took off into the direction of the address Fizzy had punched into his navigation system.

💚🍑💙

_There was a small rasp on my door when mum stuck her head through the slit. “Hey baby.” She coos. I sniffled and wipe at my eyes. Mum’s worried enough about me, don’t want her feeling that way because of me and I try to look less helpless._

_“Hi” my answer is weak from crying the last 48 hours or so. She places something in front of me. It’s quite a large box. “This was left for you.”_

_“Me?”_

_“Yes.” She shifts the box to show the big_ To Harry _sign written over it. “It's light.”_

_“It’s quite big.” I sniffle back._

_“Right. I’ll leave you to it then.” She throws me a kiss and I stare at the writing. It’s the same as the one from the little note on my rose. I involuntarily blush,_ please be from Louis _, my mind betrays me yet again. Slowly I shuffle forward and out of my duvet. Pulling the box towards myself. It’s a big moving box like the ones the Tomlinson’s used to get their stuff to their new house. It’s only a couple of streets away. I try to pry at the opening, but someone made sure that it would be shut with fat strips of boxing tape. It kind of reminds me of Louis’ little box for my birthday. That was very sweet. But since his betrayal I put the bracelet off and on my night stand, deciding it can daunt me from there instead of from my wrist. I swallow down the lump that wants to form back in place and grab my scissors slowly opening the tape up. Mum was right it is very light and I don’t want to cut or break anything inside. It takes me a minute or two and then I’m slowly lifting the lid._

_There is some kind of clothing in it, but atop I fish a small note out. It’s in the same handwriting and my heart rate picks up as I read it. My heart is jumping of joy and my hands started to shiver, almost unable to re and re-read the note._ Curly, you look amazing! L _next to the L is another one of those xx-ed out smiley faces. “Louis” I whisper as if I could conjure him up simply by saying his name, but my life isn’t a fairytale after all. I carefully place the note to my left onto the bed and put my hand in one more time. He bought me three beautiful dress shirts. All of them exquisite in nature: a pink blouse with white pock-a-dots, one with flamingos on them and another black shirt with white hearts on it. I hold them up and smile. Heart fluttering and hands still twitching in overtime, I fall onto my back, pushing the shirt into my face and giggle. It’s unmanly high, but I can’t bring myself to give flying fuck!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter might take me a little longer, because my cousin just arrived for a visit. He wants to go exploring and on adventures so I won't be able to write as much.


	3. Brave Enough I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part one of Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m so sorry for the long wait… this chapter took a life of its own and the word count doubled from the earlier chapters, so I have decided to split 'Brave Enough' in two.
> 
> (Trigger warning: there is some violence in this chapter.)

“Maybe I should up me game.” 

Jade concedes next to him, staring hopefully at Louis “right! What you want from me again?“

“Do you ever listen Tomlinson?”

“Just me charm sweets.” Louis gives an exaggerated kiss-y face before approaching his locker.

“Need you to set me up with someone, some losers are getting the idea that I’ve been single too long.”

“And?” Louis starts entering his locker combination, he’s got a locker in the middle, one above and one below him which happens to be perfect for his physical size. Louis is not small of course, but he’s definitely not tall.

“They’re asking me out on dates when they clearly haven’t got a chance, so you’re going to have to stop me dry spill. Set me up with someone, please.”

He opened his locker, and something drifts out of it, slowly like a feather. Jade bends down to pick it up and reaches over to pass it on. “Sure I might have a think.” He says before unfolding the small note to read it.

_Thank you, Lou_ \- H xx 

Louis stares hard at those few words, he looks around the hallway and finds Harry talking to Niall a few feet away. Harry sheepishly looks at him and grins biting down on his cherub lips. Louis gives him a tentative smile. ”That’s from Harry?“ Jade brought him back out of his fonding. 

“Ah yeah.“ He says gentle.

“What’s he thanking you for?” She asks looking over into the little note. _She probably never heard of privacy before._

“Got him a little going away present.” 

“He’s leaving?” Jade asks confused.

“No. I moved out of his a few days ago.” Louis says a little surprised by the long conversation about it.

“Oh that’s awfully nice of you.” Louis slammed the door to his locker shut and shrugged towards her before taking off towards their next class. “Hm… what exactly did you get him?“ 

“A few of those dress shirts he likes so much with the worst patterns I could find. Knew he’d like them right away. One of them has flamingos on them I think.” He looks up to remember, even though he knows damn right which ones he brought “Had them pink birds on them anyway.” 

“That’s sweet.” She muses, looking at him weird with a cocked head.

“Yeah, yeah. Jade you keep repeating yourself!“ To say Louis is getting a little annoyed is an understatement.

“No it’s just… why’d you do it?” She still looks bewildered and cocky.

Louis contemplated repeating the same lie, but opted for a bit of truth instead “He was down the last few days that I lived with him… it might have had something to do with what I said. I just wanted to do something nice for him... you know… make him feel better. Guess it worked.” 

Jade watched him for a few seconds and with a little huff she said “you know what he’d really appreciate? If you found a way to delete that bloody picture!” With that she turned on her heel and walked into their classroom not even looking over her shoulder to see, if he was following. _What’s gotten into her?_ He shakes his head and follows before the bell rings making him late again.

💚🍑💙

Louis parks in front of the big gate like instructed. He takes the two Starbucks drinks into his hand and balances them safely out of his car. With his heel he slams his door shut. He quickly walks past some very disturbed faces into the venue. He’s never been to one of these things, none of his sisters were that into horses to be competitive at it. Louis keeps to Eleanor’s instructions, heading left to the training ground, keeping to the braces until he has found the right brown slightly curvy hair. 

Walking up to the fence he whistles through his teeth. Multiple riders turn around to him and many coaches scold him. _Whoops_ not the best thing to whistle with tons of horses around. He shrugs apologetically once El has managed to get her mare to Louis. He reaches up to pass her, her vanilla iced mochaccino whatever the hell she ordered from him. She takes a small sip and smiles “cheers.” He smiles at her, and she leans down at quite an angle to touch Louis lips with hers. Louis stands on a beam of the fences to reach her too. “I’m almost up.” She tells him once she’s seated back straight on her horse. “The others are sitting over there if you wanna join them.” She nods towards a specific section of the bleaches. 

“Others?” Louis tries to hide his surprise when he searches for familiar faces. He snorts annoyed when he recognises the two. “You invited Michael Clifford and Luke Hemmings?” A bizarre grimace forms on his lips.

“Yes,” Eleanor says matter of factly. When she realises Louis sour face she continues, “I know them since I was a kid, Louis! Luke lives across from me! They’re nice.” She takes a bigger gulp of her iced coffee, smiling in content. 

“Thought you don’t hang with bullies.” Louis reminds her bitterly, remembering her chastising him for accidentally encoring Ashton’s bullying against Harry in the park 9 weeks ago. 

“Mike and Luke aren’t bullies. Ash is. They’re just...tagging along.” 

“That’s not really cool either.” 

“Oh Lou! Give them a chance.” 

“Fine,” he exclaims a little frustrated. “Good luck babe.” 

“Cheers babe.” She waves and trots her horse back to her coach. Louis makes his way to the breaches to find Michael and Luke, meanwhile texting with Stan about coming over for a weekend. He hung out with Michael a couple of times, because he was friendly with Danielle and thus Liam. Luke, on the other hand was a bit of an enigma. “Oi, Oi.” He starts the conversation, sitting down next to Luke, stuffing his phone in his pocket. “You both here for El?” He asks while taking a sip of his tea.

“Dunno about him, but I’m here for Arza, my girl. She’s coming up next.” Luke points towards a girl on top of a black horse with white hooves. Louis nods and digs in his jumper for a light and a ciggy. “You can’t do that here mate.” Luke laughs. “You never been around horses, have ya?”

“Not really. Me sisters weren’t into that shit.” 

“Right well, horses spoke easy. No fire.” Luke comments as the speaker introduces his girlfriend. They watch her exhibit _something or other_ on her horse. Music starts playing and while Arza sits very straight on her horse she makes it dance. Luke is vividly clapping next to him, and Louis gives him an annoyed look. Luke laughs “It’s called dressage. It’s an art.”

“Don’t look too complicated.” 

“Trust me it is.” He says with high pulled eyebrows. Arza trots back to the middle and receives a high score from the judges. She nods a thank you and walks off. 

“Up next, Miss Eleanor J. Calder on her beautiful mare Aquitaine.” Eleanor greets the judges with a bob of the head and starts doing the same thing as Azra.

“Is it the same choreography?” Michael howls next to him and only stops when someone stares at him suspiciously.

“Sorry.” He holds up his hand at the old lady and turns to Louis “Course not! That’ll be cheating. This ain’t footie, where you can cheat a strategy of another team without getting side eye. She’d get a deduction for stealing if not disqualified entirely.” Louis grins at him for being such a know it all.

“Sorry, I rustled your feathers dear.”

“Oh shut up and clap for your girlfriend.” Louis turns to the field to clap and stand cheering. He’s very much the loudest, but he doesn’t care about the proper way to clap for a horse show. El recognises him and there is a soppy smile in the corner of her lips. She receives her marks. 

“Alright, that’s me I’m off.” Michael gets up to scoot past them.

“Have fun on your date, mate.” 

“Not a date. H just wants to hang out.”

“Keep telling yourself that, mate.” Luke teases while he turns back to the exhibition where another girl Sarah Whale, or whatever, trots into the field. “Right, that puts El on place 12. Maybe she can boost up with the last discipline.” _Another discipline? Argh, gonna have to sit through another._

He turns to Luke, “you come often, then?”

“Yeah, me and Azra been together a year, I learned a lot I suppose.” Louis nods as they watch a boring song get performed.

“Who’s he going out with?” Louis asks after the air gets too awkward between the two.

“Oh I don’t know.”

“Didn’t sound like it.” Secrecy annoys Louis incredibly. 

Luke seems to debate the subject in his mind “Harry. He’s hanging out with Harry. Don’t know who he’s supposedly dating, though.” Louis’ blood freezes up immediately. 

“What?” He turns to stare at Luke, but he’s already pondering if he said too much. “Michael is dating Harry? What’ll Ashton and Calum say to that?” Louis wants answers. His heart is uncomfortably hitting against his ribcage and his cold fingers are sweating. He rubs them against his dark blue jeans.

“Told ye, it ain’t a date. Calm down mate. They hang out sometimes.” 

“Even though he bullies him?” 

Luke rolls his eyes at him, cocking his head to stare at him he says “Ash bullies him, Micheal don’t.” 

“Right that’s why I saw him kick ‘im in the balls last week.” 

“Guess they bonded over that. Why do you care anyway? You want to report this to Ash and Cal, do you?” Louis and Luke are staring spit fire at each other. Both pissed off at each other for similar reasons. 

“Shit.” Louis breaks eye contact “of course not! I’d never hurt Harry or Michael. There’s enough of that going around.”

“Look, they want to hang out that fine. Harry’s in the clear for the moment anyway so no worries on that. If they wanna hang out, it got to be now!” Louis wants to ask why, but decides against it, because Luke pulls a beer out of his backpack. “Now let’s make this horrendously boring shit show a little more fun, ey?” Louis can’t help himself but sneer a smile and grabs a bottle from him.

Over two hours later, a little tipsy and getting cold from the fresh breeze, Louis walks over to Eleanor who is rubbing her horse gently. “Congrats, babe, tenth place that great.” He hugs her, lifting her off of her feet, giving her an impromptu kiss. She giggles surprised.

“Ain’t too great, though.” She says into his neck.

“Nonsense. You moved up from 13th to 10th throughout, that’s really good.” 

She looks at him suspiciously “how’d you know?” 

“Took some lessons from Luke.” She nods and turns back to her horse. “He says congrats by the way, so does Michael.” 

“Thanks.” She puts some sort of cloth over her mare.

“Yeah yeah.” Louis knows he shouldn’t, but he bites his lip and watches El’s stark back “you know Michael going on a date with Harry?” 

El doesn't react particularly. “Don’t think it’s a date, Louis.” She taunts Louis’ nerves. Louis thrusts his hands into his jumper, so he doesn’t rip out his hair in frustration.

“Serious? EL?” She turns to him with big shocked eyes.

“What? What you so miffed about?”

“He’s bullying him, how’s this okay?”

“It’s Harry’s decision isn’t it?” She asks and walks off with the horse. She leads it outside, while Louis grunts to get the energy in his veins out of his nerves. This can’t be happening. His breath stutters in his throat, and he kicks against the stall doors when he follows Eleanor.

“Hello Mr. Calder.” He calls to the bald man who is wrenching Eleanor’s horse into the horse truck attached to his car.

“Tomlinson, good to see you supporting.” 

“Sure thing.” Louis tries to smile at him while hiding his cold hands in his jumper. The man only nods, while wrestling with the large animal. Finally, El dangles a carrot in front of her and manoeuvres the horse inside gently.

“Hey, El.” A guy approaching them calls out. He’s tall with short dark hair and wears tight horse riding clothes that stick to his calves magnificently. “Great job out there today.”

Eleanor turns to him and a small blush reaches her high cheeks “thanks Max. But I’m like in tenth place, so…” She makes some jazz hands to show how little she thinks of her own achievements.

“Don’t put yourself down, love.” Louis calls, moving to cuddle up to Eleanor’s side. “I’m Louis.” He introduces himself to the boy.

He reaches out a hand “Max. So you're the boyfriend?” He smiles cockily. 

“And I’m the dad.” Mr. Calder reaches out and shakes his hand with a long gaze. He looks the boy up and down. He wrinkles his nose. Louis can see what he’s doing, and he thinks it’s rather rude. He stayed over at the Calder house last Saturday after they had lost their footie game. Her mother had made a delicious breakfast in the morning to get to know Louis, but apparently Mr. Calder didn’t bother, he skipped breakfast to run to work, _on a bloody Saturday for Christ’s sake_ , to Manchester. ‘He does that a lot,’ Eleanor had told him. “Let’s get going then.” He turns back to his car, and waves to Louis, “see you around kid.” 

“Bye.” Louis waves. 

“Sorry, guess we ought to go.” El says a little disappointed.

“No worries,” Max says, “see you at practice in a few days, yeah?” 

“Love too.” She says hopeful. Louis is intrigued looking between Max’s back and Eleanor’s eyes. 

“Real proud of you.” Louis tells her and her dark eyes re-position to look at him. “Tenth place is amazing, darling.”

“Thanks,” the car honks, and she looks towards her father. Rolling her eyes, she tells him “dad’s going mad, he hates waiting. Makes us wait all the time, though.” Louis nods and gives her a quick kiss.

“Just know I’m proud.” She smiles and finally her smile reaches her eyes. They kiss one more time, before she skips towards the car and waves at him. He throws her a kiss before walking towards his own car. Of course people have parked all around Louis, which causes him to go back and forth all the time. He huffs annoyed and his blood is boiling by the time he squeezes out of the parking. A guy has the rudeness to honk at him and Louis throws him the middle finger. 

When he comes home, he congratulates his sisters on not choosing one of the most boring sports, next to Golf of course. “You didn’t like it then?” His mother muses, but Louis only snorts.

“He’s just saying that because he’s scared of the horses.” Lottie argues while stuffing a burrito into her mouth. 

“Bullocks.” Louis gets aggravated, such lies again. His skin is prickling with annoyance these days, it’s like he has another layer of skin that is sizzling with nervous energy that sets him off in the wrong moment in the wrong way. He just hopes he won’t blow up at his family by accident.

“I just called your granddad.” Jay defuses the situation by gaining their attention. “He agreed to do something for me, but he had a suggestion that I really like! I think I want you to do something…bear in mind you can always say no.” 

“Jesus mum, that’s starting to sound freaky.” Fizzy stares at her with an apprehensive side eye.

“Says the right one, Mrs Underworld.” Lottie subconsciously takes her mother’s side. 

“Queen of the Underworld thank you very much.” Fizzy bites back.

“Back on topic,” Jay faces Louis agape. “Louis, would you like to walk me down the aisle this summer?” Louis coughs up his burrito. He didn’t expect this. Once he can breathe again, thanks to Lottie’s harsh raps against his back, he jumps up and cuddles his mum. Giving her multiple kisses on her chubby cheek.

“Yes, yes, yes. I’d love to…if that’s really what you want.” 

“Honey, it is.” To say Louis is excited over this is an understatement.

“Then that’ll be my Mother’s Day present to you.”

“You’re just trying to cheat your way out of a present tomorrow!” Lottie lets her mouth drop shocked. But Louis was already very pleased with himself.

“Can I be a flower girl?” Phoebe asks excitedly. 

“Nope.” His mother replies. 

Phoebe pouts, “Why not? I’d be the prettiest flower girl!” 

“Yes darling you would, but honey you’re too old now.” 

“Who says we have to apply the norm? It’s our wedding.” Dan argues from his seat next to Phoebe. 

“I’ll have a think on it.” Jay tells him with a wink. Daisy and Phoebe clap their hands together as if this was an achievement. 

Perrie is huddling next to Louis, who’s rummaging his pockets for a smoke. “So? You’re going on a date with Jed?” Perrie started grilling Jade after she had caught up to them leaving the college building from Management Class.

“Yeah, Louis set us up two weeks ago.” Jade answers her best friend’s question.

“You serious, Jed? Of all people Jed?” Louis isn’t listening, sometimes it’s hard to listen to girl’s talk. It’s true after Jade asked him he found a friend of Sandy Beals from footie that seemed nice. _Don’t really see the problem, though._

“What is it to you?” Jade exasperates.

“Honestly, Jade, he’s a tool.” Perrie argues just as annoyed as the other one. Louis is getting frustrated, where are his fags? _Whoops, not what I meant, nice pun._ His brain starts arguing with itself.

“What so you’re allowed to date someone and I’m not?” Louis' hand still on his pant pockets when he catches sight of Harry. “After I am literally the only one supporting you right now. You can’t support me in this?” He’s draped in basketball shorts, a muscle shirt that accentuate his new bulgier bicep and his beautiful loopy hair is wet, stuck under a Green Bay Pecker’s beanie. He’s lugging a rather heavy duffel bag on his shoulder. Louis swallows as he follows his easy gait.

“Supporting me? You mean that stupid dance competition, that I didn’t even want to go to if it weren’t for you insisting?” Perries accusatory voice beams more annoyed than before and Louis turns to give Jade an audacious look. But the two girls are staring at each other like screeching kittens about to jump at each other. 

“Right!” Jade’s voice goes cold “and where the fock was Zayn? Nowhere sweetheart, just like now! Like always!” Louis walks off. He’s pretty sure that the girls don’t realise anyway. Their voices fade out as he picks up his pace to catch up.

“Harry.” He barely hears him, “Haz…Curly.” He grabs onto Harry’s arm to turn him. Louis stares at big green eyes. _They’re just so bloody gorgeous, I could get lost in them all day._

“Sorry.” Harry says, picking the headphones out of his ear that Louis hadn’t seen before. “Had these in.” He holds them up with an apologetic look. 

“No worries.” Louis says. He’s wringing his hands, even if the weather has heated up, Louis’ always slightly cold. “You going somewhere? That looks heavy.” 

“Not that heavy.” Harry says, frowning down at his bag.

“You going to Michael’s then?” Louis can’t help himself, it’s been on his mind all week. The wringing of his hands is starting to hurt, the sizzling under his skin comes back in full force and his heart starts to hurt.

“Clifford?” Harry looks confused. “Why would I do that?” 

“Aren’t you dating him?” Louis accuses him. Maybe Jade and Perrie’s anger has washed over to him. “I mean that’s what he told me at the horse show last Sunday.” Harry’s eyes go big and bigger with surprise. 

“I don’t…” He’s scratching the back of his head, itching the wet hair in its beanie. 

“He’s your bully! This is a bad idea Haz. What if he is using you to get some kick with Ashton?” Harry’s ears turn red. “You just going to snog someone that treats ye like shit?” 

“Tend to have that habit yeah.” He bites back, the red in his ears isn’t from embarrassment but from anger. 

It sparks Louis blood into overdrive, his hands shake “I never bullied you.” 

“Really?” It’s a thoughtful question “than why’d you feel the need to make me a gift?”

“Because…” Louis’s mind is cutting him short on proper mind function. “Because…” _you cried, and I don’t like hearing those sniffles. Because I was a dick, and I was the reason for you crying consecutively for days! Because I hurt you to feel better about myself and because I was angry and I hurt the one person I swore not to hurt._ Louis’s now looking at his hands pensively “You deserve better than him, Hazza.” 

“I don’t need you to protect me, Louis.” Harry grunts, his biceps are bulging more from his anger and Louis would be totally distracted and attracted, weren’t he in a speech battle right now. 

“Right, that’s why Gemma asked me to help with your bullying? Help you out when she’s gone.” Harry blinks at him disorientated. Louis continues because he needs Harry to listen. He can’t let Harry go out with someone that’ll definitely hurt him. “Michael might be nice on his own, but he’s a cunt when he’s with his friends and that’s the person that’ll hurt you.” 

“Oh get off it.” Harry squirms. “You’re just like him! Louis, you never gave me a reason to believe in you. Telling me I’m beautiful once just ain’t enough to redeem yourself.”

“But to condemn me?” Louis asks. His heart is falling apart inside his chest. He knows he was a shite to Harry, but letting him go completely for that? _That’s not fair, I think._ He watches Harry’s eyes rank over his own form.

“Yes.” He turns around and walks over to a Land Rover that’s parked in the driveway. Louis vaguely recognises the squared jaw of Harry’s dad, Harry doesn’t turn around aware that he just left Louis standing there. Louis’ hands are shaking, and he can feel the sizzle in his veins go back down, but now anxiety covers him like a sweat.

“Fine. Go. See if I care.” Perrie shouts out and comes to a stop next to Louis. They watch Jade storm off and get into a car. “You know where Zayn is?”

Louis shakes his head, Zayn was like a ghost sometimes or smoke, there is no way you can catch smoke. A ghost is top palpable to be Zayn, but smoke, that's inevitable to disappear slowly. “You want to grab a pizza. Don’t fancy being alone right now.” Surprisingly Perrie nods. 

“Your hair is going blonde again.” Louis says from the driver’s seat, half a pizza slice in his mouth.

“Yeah. Don’t know if I wanna keep that.” Perrie looks at her half-eaten pizza in thought. “Jade coloured her hair blue when I went purple, so no one would give me shit for it.” She smiles sadly at him and then asks “Why’d you get into a fight with Harry?”

“I can’t seem to be able to talk to him in any other way.” Louis shoves a full slice in his mouth, talking around it “Why’d you fight with Jade?”

Perrie looks a little disgusted, but answers “think I’m afraid of losing her.”

“How? She’s your best friend.”

“Zayn’s just so fucking passive lately. If Jade goes away, I'll be all alone.”

“You’ll always have me, Leigh Anne and Jesy, Barbara, heck even Liam.”

“No offence but you’re not Jade!”

“Should I colour me hair blue then?” Perrie laughs for the first time. “You know I play on the girls team right?”

“What girls team?”

“Cheshire Crusaders, they have a girls team and I’m on it.” 

“No way!” 

“So is Leigh-Anne. Fancy a scrimmage?” 

“Sure.” The two of them drive over to Leigh-Annes house, where a makeshift football goal was built out of scrap wood. Leigh-Anne’s older sister Sarah stood in goal for Louis, while they played against Perrie and Leigh. Embarrassingly enough, at least for Louis, he started to build up a sweat. Sarah was cheering him on from the back as he finally scored again, only later did the girls reveal that Leigh filled the goalkeeper position at the Crusaders girls team. 

Sooner than later, Louis had to head home as he’s technically still on house arrest by his mother. The game is left at a tie. The girls promised never to say anything. “How was footie?” Lottie asks as he sees Louis enter.

“Good.” 

“Really? Looks like you barely broke a sweat.” Dan is scanning his body.

“Trust me I did.” He gets his phone out to text Perrie ‘thanks for the unusual practice, love.’ He smiles when she sends a thumb up and a ‘next time we’ll beat your sorry ass Tommo!’ He didn’t tell anyone that he had skipped practice because he had a fight with Harry and instead he played football with a few girls.

“You still got energy?” Dan asks him repeatedly until Louis looks up from his phone. He grunts annoyed, there are about a million other things he’d rather do right now than to build his sisters tree house. After moving into the house, Dan had decided that the twins would be too old for a play ground and decided Louis and him would build a treehouse instead. They were quite far, usually Louis was begging him to get to work, because they were about a few hours away from Louis regaining his freedom. With that goal in sight, he went outside with Dan to, hopefully, finish the treehouse. 

“How are things?” Dan asks as he hammers the ladder together. 

Louis holding on the other end “Getting used to this place.”

“Yeah? Starting to like this ole place?” Louis just smiles. “How’s you and Harry?”

Louis gulps down his nerves, he was under the impression that their heart-to-heart over 6 weeks ago was a never-talk-about-again thing. He ends up shrugging, “not much changed.”

Dan looks thoughtful, “I’m here if you need to talk.”

“Thanks.” Louis smiles. “Appreciate it. Actually, Dan? What do you know about the Irwin’s?”

“Well, Anne-Marie divorced John when the kids were pretty young. I know John when we were younger, about 28 or so.Ashton, his son, decided to live with his dad here in Cheshire, but John is in the British army, so he’s not home very often. Ashton is getting raised by his grandfather, Allen, I think.”

“That why he acts out so much?” Louis asks as they lift the ladder to make sure that it will sustain his weight. 

“I dunno.” Dan looks at him, “all I know is that when John’s in town, Ashton is a good kid, but when he’s gone, he becomes a nightmare.” Louis nods thoughtfully. Dan gives him a pad on the back, “looks like we’re almost done, only the roof left.”

“Fuck me.” Louis wipes his brow, “it’s a lot, innit?” Dan throws his head back in a laugh.  


“Your mum was very thorough with this punishment wa’n’t she?” They both smile at each other.

“Pretty sure she just wanted us to bond.” 

Dan looks at him shy and asks “did we need that, though?” He’s scared of Louis’ answer, maybe his step-son didn’t think that their heart-to-hearts mean anything for their relationship.

“Nah we’re good.” 

“Let’s see what your mum has whipped up for dinner she’ll we?” 

“She realises that this project is cutting down on my homework time right?” Dan does not look impressed with that statement and rolls his eyes as they enter the kitchen to a delicious smell.

💚🍑💙

It’s pouring today and the pitch is flooded, making it incredibly hard to stay on his own feet. Louis runs forward and body checks the guy a little, which causes him to slide and fall. Louis grabs the ball from him, while he’s complaining about a foul. But Louis continues, because the referee didn’t blow his whistle. Louis dribbles forward lifting his eyes to see Ashton in the clear. He balances the ball on his toes, bounces it once before shooting it towards Ash. The wind picks up and blows the ball right into the defenders arms. “Gods damn it!” Ashton screams and tries to tackle the defender, Louis himself scream “Shit!” when the defender passes it up forward before Ashton reaches him in time. 

“Doing great Tommo!” Perrie cheers on the bleachers. She and Jade are huddling under a big green umbrella. The bleachers are emptier than usual. Most of the town decided to stay in the warmth of their houses today. Only friends and family of the actual players are present. Louis rushes back on the pitch, almost slipping a couple of times which gains him a warning call from coach to watch it. The other team, Newcastle Raiders, is on their penalty box, and he can see Liam struggle to get the ball of their forward attacker. Louis watches as the attacker slips but manages to kick the ball into the general direction of the goal. It’s kicked at such an awkward angle that the ball flies into the net. Louis moans in frustration. 

There is a small cheer from the bleachers, muffled by the general encouraging clap from home town folk. Louis looks behind him to see Dan with his mum clapping slowly, the girls are all in Doncaster to visit their father Mark, which might excuse his mothers overreaction of joy to almost jump into Dans lap when she catches Louis eyes. He smiles and waves at her. His eyes land on Michael and Luke that are also clapping, Michael’s spiky hair is clinging along his face while he is pointing towards Ashton explaining something to the person next to him. A person whose face is hidden under a dark blue rain coat, but a white headband peeks through. Louis can’t focus on that, so he turns back to the pitch, running up to the midfield line. He looks back towards Michael and Luke and sees two older men towering behind them. “Eyes here, Tommo.” Irwin urges.

Louis turns back to the game. But throughout the game he continues to look back to the same spot. The contours of the face become more visible with every glance and its familiar to him, a little too familiar. 10 minutes before final whistle, Louis has finally seen a spiral of wet curly hair peek out from underneath the rain coat, when his feet give out under him, and he falls on his side. He rasps a cry and holds his ankle. “Shit sorry pal.” A blonde haired dude with a stern face says over him. 

“The fuck, you ain’t got eyes?” He screams a little to loud, it was a shock, he never saw it coming. The referee has already blown the whistle for a foul.

“Maybe you should stop staring at your boyfriend and star playing the game.”

Louis is up on his feet in no time, his side hurts a little but otherwise he seems to be fine “Shut up or I’ll belt yer!”

“Ye focking what?” The player taunts him, “ye fist ain’t going to reach me, ye radgie cunt!” 

“Who you calling a cunt?”

“You!” He points towards the stands, the place where Harry is currently blinking away the rain that is stuck in his eyelash, dripping down like a tear “and ye little boy toy.” Louis looses it, he steps forward and punches the guy in the shoulder. He groans loud and stumbles back. Another blow into the whistle indicates that both players have received a yellow card. The Raider grins at him through his eyelashes and Louis would really like to punch his lights out, if it weren’t for Coach screaming at him at the sidelines. Liam is grabbing his neck and turning him away from the scene.

“You alright, mate?”

“Fine” Louis replies thickly. He walks off the pitch a minute later, when Winston takes him out of the game. He fumes on the bench, waiting for the game to finally end. A few seconds later he gets his relief and runs into the chaining room.

“Hey.” The guy says looking up. “Just really wanted to apologise. I provoked you, and you had a natural reaction. Sorry about that.”

“Thanks for apologising.” Louis says dumbfounded.

“To be granted I’d probably have the same reaction. When my girlfriend looks at the guy for too long, I’d go nuts too.” Louis blinks a couple of times, the boy is running a hand behind his neck, awkwardly scratching himself.

“Oh, uh, he’s not me boyfriend.” The boy looks up in surprise.

“Guess that explains it then.” Louis gives him a questioning look. “When you lost your cool, that curly headed guy looked mighty pleased with himself.” Louis is yet again dumbfounded, there is a honk outside and the Newcastle player apologises again “see you in the pitch next year Tommo!” He scurries off leaving Louis with his own thoughts. 

Louis quickly gets into Dans car, not looking up to see what Harry is up to. “Thanks for coming.” Louis says earnestly while putting his seatbelt on. 

“You okay, boo? What happened out there. You were very upset.”

“Just got provoked is all.” He tells her, she looks back at him with an alarmed face.“The guy just came out to apologise to me so no sweat.” Her mood lightens a bit.

“So what should we do with the rest of the day? Eat pizza? Play strip poker? Anything.” 

“Oh Daniel.” His mother snickers into her hand like a teenager.

“Run around the house naked and scream.” Louis says with an amused twinkle in his bright blue eyes. 

“A plan it is.” Dan howlers and starts the engine. Louis smirks in the back seat. During that weekend, Louis and Dan finally finish the treehouse. His mother declares that his house arrest has been lifted, but that she is watching him. If there is any more tantrums on the pitch she might shackle him again.

The first thing he does is to drive to Zayn’s shed, where the two of them share a blunt and dance of all things. It’s Louis playlist and at some point when Bob Marley came on, he threw his controller out of the way and starts rotating his hips. “That look filthy,” Zayn laughs, his hands around a spray paint bottle. Watching Louis, he decided to tackle him and paints his blue pants black.

“Oi! No fare.” Louis complains and kicks the bottle out of his hands, while he wrestles with him. The tackle each other, not noticing Zayn’s sister watching them. A few beer bottles spill on the floor, and they roll in the alcohol absent-mindedly. Zayn cuts off his air supply, telling him to give in, but Louis doesn’t give up. Louis full on kicks Zayn in the crotch. Zayn moans terribly low.

“Ooh blooming ‘eck, are you alright?”

“Eeh m’ god,” Zayn’s sister, Safaa, snickers in the doorway, “nice shot Louis!” 

“Fuck ye!” Zayn screams at her with red eyes and devilish look on his face. Safaa takes a step back with a disgusted look on her face. 

“What’cha need love?” Louis asks her with a tender in his voice that he usually uses on his sisters when they were young.

“Dad’s coming tonight.” She dresses Zayn. “Mum needs you to stop puffing and help her with the fish.”

“Why ain’t you cookin? That not a daughters job?” 

“Frigging ‘ell,” Safaa is already leaving through the door proclaiming “you’re the bitch in this household.”

“Fuck, your sister is hard work.” Louis tells Zayn, whose face is flaming. The devil that was on his face earlier is now boiling and his eyes shadow a violet shade of shame at the same time. 

“They all are. Yours ain’t that annoying?” Zayn asks, sitting up. 

“Not really. They can be, but we don’t hate each other.”

Zayn gives him an uncertain smile, though he’s still violet and red “don’t hate them, mate.” Louis gives him a you-sure-about-that-look. “Maybe a little, but I’d still give them everything I have if I could.” 

After a moment of silence, Louis asks “So what’s the big deal with your dad coming home.” 

“Dad lives out of town, only comes home for the weekend or the occasional extended weekend.” Zayn cleans up a bit, but ends up simply rearranging rubbish from the sofa to the one side of the shed. It’s an ugly mess of rubbish.

“Your parents separated?” Louis empathises. 

“No. Just live apart during the week.”

“Cool, co-coo-cool.” Louis cockles. Zayn gives him a weird look. 

“So, you kind of got to go.” Zayn elaborates his weird face expression. “See you on the weekend?”

“Nope.” Louis deadpans. “Going to Dony.” 

“Cool, co-coo-cool.” Zayn mocks him.

“Got to get out of here you know?” Louis says, deliberating if he should just let his heart finally burst, letting everything out that they just needed to say. Tell him about his heartbreak, the energy in his veins that won’t leave, the envy and jealousy that peaks into his belly once in a while like a green dragon. But then he remembers the red and violet expression on Zayn’s face when he addressed his sisters, and he keeps his mouth shut.

💚🍑💙

The beat is drumming through him, making the soles of his feet vibrate and inviting him to lift his feet. His head has been lifted to the sky for a while now, the sweat dripping down his forehead, down his exposed neck and into his muscle shirt. The club is sweating itself, smog is building in the ceiling and there are green, orange and blue lights filtering it all. Louis closes his eyes remembering the most beautiful green he has seen to date. His hips sway against the person behind him, the man that introduced himself as Beat. Whatever the fuck that was about. There is a leg between his own and they simultaneously shimmy down when Flo Rider sings ‘going low… low…low.’When they come back up, they are flushed against each other, Luke is grunting into Louis’ face and their lips find each other. It’s messy and wet and familiar, the body behind him is turning away, having lost the battle for Louis’ glorious bum. 

Stan is caring pints towards them, calling over to them “some snack lifters lads!” The lads dislodge from the dancers and fall against a naked black wall. Louis pushes his wet fringe back and gulps down the cold brew.

“Welcome back mate!” Oli exclaims with a gruff voice. Louis’ gaze gets torn away from the naked chests and hard make-out sessions towards his friends.

“Thanks,” Louis grins looking over to Luke, who is leaning against the wall right next to them. Oddly enough he reminds him of Zayn a bit, their darker skin tone, similar hair and same face structure. It turns him off a bit as they are both attractive men, but Zayn is his best friend, and he wasn’t attracted to him. Luke was grabbing for his side and slid next to him, their bodies aligned in a natural ordinality. His body was hot against his side, and Luke was sucking on his neck. There was a clear implication in it and a solemn want between them. Luke stays plastered to him like that throughout the cab ride to Stan’s place, sucked harder when they dropped Oli off first. “Pack it in.” Louis pushes him off, feeling the tug of teeth on him. “Can’t mark me, Lukie.” 

“Still got that new girlfriend, huh?”Stan questions, while Luke goes back to licking along his neck and rushing his hands against his sides.

“Yeah,” Louis faces Stan’s burly face. “Yeah, she’s well lush. Got a horse fetish, though.”

Stan barks a laugh, scaring the driver “sorry, pal.” He turns his attention back to Louis, hoping the alcohol has done his job. “What about the bet? Can you cash in yet?” A distant memory tries to rumble back Louis’ attention, but he shakes his head.

Wanting the buzz to continue and the untwisted gut to stay untwisted he shakes his head “lets not.” Stan nods and looks at Luke, giving him a forceful shove off of Louis. The grin when he slams his head against the window, crackling harshly at Luke’s pain. 

“Very funny.” Luke disagrees.

Saturday ends on the floor. Stan is lying in his bed, snoring ungracefully loud. Luke and Louis have taken to the floor, lying on two sleeping mats that they pushed together. Luke is sucking on Louis cock, his mind goes back to his best blow job and desire hits him. And something else. Michael comes back into his mind and the two of them all over each other. _I’m better than him._ He pushes Luke off of him and makes him return to him, face to face. Their naked skin rubbing hotly against each other, when Louis flips Luke on to his back.

“Luke, I wanna fuck you.” Louis says into the heat. Their bodies are tightly interwoven, and his cock is already rubbing hard against Luke’s ass. 

“Fuck,” Luke mutter. “Okay.” He’s reaching around to produce lube and a condom out of a bag. 

Louis goes back to his neck to suck a hickey into his neck while rubbing himself “open yourself up.” Louis’ demands and Luke awkwardly shifts to get his lubed up finger into himself while pushing Louis’ cock out of the way. Louis watches his trained face and starts rubbing his cock against Lukes rigid one lying red on his stomach. Pleasure shoots through him from his bum up his spine. He shivers. 

After chasing his orgasm for what feels like an eternity, Luke tells him “I’m ready.” Louis sits back on his heels to open his condom and slowly rolls it over his cock. Nerves start to play inside his stomach, telling him that he doesn’t know what he’s doing. But his heart plays a small video of Harry in boxer shorts, a sneaky moment embedded in his mind when he lived with Harry in February, in front of his eyes, and he knows. He knows _what_ he wants to do to Harry, this is just a test run. He grabs his tip and positions himself on Luke’s rim. 

“Ready?” Luke nods biting his thin lip. And Louis pushes in. His vision goes white, his hands grip into Luke’s hips, hard. Luke moans underneath him while Louis slowly fucks his cock into him. It’s delicious and so tight, Louis doesn’t know how long he will be able to last _... God it feels so good_. Muscle is contorting around his cock, like a tight vice-like sleeve and Luke is moaning cheering him on like a porn star. This feels so much better than Eleanor’s pussy. Luke’s hand scratch at his back and Louis has to grab them “cant have everyone see.” He whispers, suddenly very aware that Stan is sleeping just two feet away in his bed. But then he bottoms out. Luke moans loudly and tells him to ‘fockin move already.’ So Louis does, slow at first and then faster. His hands by Luke’s sides give him leverage when he snaps his hips forward.

“You have to find other angles,” Luke teaches him in his haze. “Got to find that prostataaaaaaa.”

“Found it.” Louis says cheekily, smirking down at his teacher. Luke looks at him annoyed but his face falls into bliss again when he hits his prostate again. And again and again. Until pleasure takes a hold of both of them shortly after another. 

Louis slips out of Luke who whines a bit at the sudden loss. Louis ties the condom and plops it into Stan’s bin. He lies back down next to Luke. “How was I?” He asks him. 

Luke’s unimpressed face breaks out into a grin “usually when the guy getting it keeps moaning oh yes yes yes and right there and god wow that’s amazing, that’s a sign your very good and you’re hitting it good!” Louis grins rolling onto his back. Proud that’s what he is proud. “Don’t let it get to your head pal.” Luke grunts lying down on his side to fall asleep with his back to Louis. 

“Mhmmm… It reeks in here.” Louis moans when he enters Stan’s kitchen on Sunday morning. Luke is shifting on his seat, trying to position himself better. Louis smirks with the knowledge _I did that._

“How’s Cheshire, dear?” Stan’s mum asks once he’s set down at the breakfast table with his friends. 

“Good. It’s actually surprisingly good.” He smiles up at her with his most charming self. He watches the eggs slip off her spatula onto his plate. Louis eagerly digs in.

“School good? People treating you well?”

Louis wants to tell her about the queer hypocrisy and the fact that he fells tight in a tiny corner, bunching him in, holding him hostage to what others might think. Instead, he hums around his food. It seems to satisfy her. “You see your dad then?” 

“Yeah, on Friday.” He stuffs some bread into his mouth “also met his new girlfriend on Saturday morning.” Louis was talking to Stan, but this subject interested her more causing her to turn around again. 

“How is she?” She asks with interest glistering eyes, taking a seat next to him, prying at him with the hot pan still in her hand.

“Yeah she’s nice. Sallie. That’s her name. The girls seem to like her.” He adds every sentence after another bite. “Except for Phoebe, she’s a little on the your-not-mom side. Which also means that…”

“Daisy is on the your-not-mom-side. I get it. How is your mom?” And so it goes on, until Luke jumps up because he can’t sit any longer, running into the hopeful arms of the shower. Stan and Louis chuckle when they go back to his room, having finished the dishes for his mum. 

Stan sits down on his bed “that the first time you two fucked?”

“Yes.” 

“Cool.” Stan is texting someone, when he asks “you still got a bird then?”

“Told ye about her, didn’t I?” Louis is collecting his things off the floor, getting ready to drive back to Cheshire. The weekend has been exactly what he needed, a little time off, good bier and sex. 

“What about crushing curly from the script?” It’s a topic Louis has been avoiding. 

He gulps, “what about him?”

“You shag him yet?” 

“No.” Louis sits down on the floor “Cheshire is different, mate. Like I can’t just do this,” he points towards the makeshift bed from last night. “I’d get mugged mate.” 

“Right.” Stan looks like he wants to elaborate, but Luke is trodding into the room with a towel around himself, as if he were shy of his body. Stan seems to be aware of Luke’s feelings, unable to confront Luke with the image of Louis being with a curly-haired boy. 

He gets the chance to tell him, when they are huggingeach other goodbye at Louis’ car in the late afternoon. “Just stay true to yourself, mate.” Louis nods and waves at Stan’s mum in the upstairs window.

“Cheers. You won’t believe it but got similar advice from Dan.”

“Sounds like your new step-dad is promising.” Louis laughs as he gets into the Volvo. 

“He got me this car!” He points out, thrumming his hands against the outside of the driver’s door. “Sithee” he says.

“Aye lad, Sithee.” The old Yorkshire goodbye rolls of their tongues before Louis puts the shift into first gear and rolls onto the street. 

💚🍑💙

The last week of March Louis uses to get high with Zayn every day, which ends up for both to get into trouble with their girlfriends. Louis and Eleanor’s first fight ends with Louis being dragged to another horse-show, however this time he has to sit through all four disciplines instead of two. Because this is a Northern England horse competition, the venue is much larger, ending in a 4-day championship. It’s antagonising and painful. At least this time around there is no Michael, but Luke Hemmings, who brought a bag of alcohol with him. Eleanor’s brother, Keith, arrived for Easter and is therefore also at the horse show. He’s stuck up and is generally an annoying man, but the alcohol looses his tongue and on the first day Luke and Louis have to carry him out of the bleachers. On Thursday of that week, they end up getting fully drunk in the Calder basement. He wakes up at Easter’s Good Friday in Eleanor’s basement snuggled into Hemming’s neck. He’s getting woken by Keith who stumbles into a toilet, splashing his own face with his own pee. Allowing Louis to full on laugh at him for the first time without repercussions. He denies Patricia’s breakfast offer, explaining that he needs to get back home in time to howler the kids to the twins’ ballet recital. “I already talked to your mother, dear.” Patricia tells him. “She said to pick two of the girls up, but that she’ll drive the rest. I’m sorry I don’t remember their names, she mentioned so many.” 

“That’s alright Mrs Calder, I’ll figure it out.” Louis says as he sits down at the table.

“Louis, please call me Patricia.” _But_ _Patricia is such a dirty name._

Louis shakes the thought and gives her a charming smile “Alright, Trish, hit me with eggs.” 

Patricia chuckles fondly, leaning down to her daughter “I really like this one.” She pokes her daughter’s cheek, who swats her hand away annoyed, rolling her eyes at Louis. 

“Honey,” Patricia starts when Louis scoops eggs on to his bread, “Simon is coming over on Easter, do you have something nice to wear?” 

“Yeah always do.” Eleanor claims. While the women talk about the most boring subject known to man, dress options, Keith leans over to him.

“Simon used to work with our dad, has no one else. And dad got him a job here. Nice lad.” Louis nods, barely listening. “I know what you are doing.” He gives a smirk towards El. 

“What?” Louis is very confused, but he gets saved by Eleanor.

Who loudly proclaims, “My god. I hope he doesn’t start with his closeted gay theory again, its so exhausting.” 

Louis refocuses on her “what’s that?”

“He has this theory about closeted men in the UK, if you closet them long enough they’ll lose their ability to withstand the natural law.”

“That sounds awful.” Louis chokes on his orange juice.

“Just an opinion dear.” Patricia argues. Louis couldn’t deny it hard enough, but his argument dies on his tongue when Eleanor’s father arrives at the breakfast table with a sour face, arguing how much he hates Easter.

Louis’ tires come to a slitting halt and bumps into something. He curses when Fizzy gets into the Passenger seat, “what did I just bump?” 

Fizzy shrugs “just a very stoic bush, the Volvo looks fine.”

“Where the fuck is Lottie, were late!” 

“That why you bumped your car?” She asks unfazed, while texting away on her phone.

“Yes. No. I thought you said, Bertie is fine.” 

“I still think it’s unnecessary to give your car a name; just call it the Volvo.”

Louis scolds “why are you so calm? Where is Lottie?” Fizzy looks up at him as if to see, if he’s getting sick. Then she faces the entrance and points towards their sister. Her hair is up in a high ponytail, and she is swaying her hips while she’s talking to a boy around Louis’ age with an Italian look. “Who the fuck is that?”

“Yer full of questions today.” Fizzy goes back to her phone. Louis gives her a spiteful stare and viciously honks the cars horn, making both Lottie and the boy twitch in angst. Lottie gives him a glare over her shoulder, but with a peck on the boy’s cheek she skips to his car. Waving at him from the back seat when Louis starts driving.

“Who was that then?” Louis inquires.

Lottie shifts in the backseat pretending to look for the clasp of the seatbelt, even though she’s already buckled in. “Just a guy I’m dating.”

Louis’ eyes go into slits, “I got to check him out then. Meet him in person, I’d say.”

“What? No!” Lottie is horrified. “You will not do such a thing. Besides, I don’t check the boys you’re dating!” 

“I don’t date boys.” Louis looks bewildered, but Fizzy gives him an unimpressed once over. “Jesus, your awful sisters.”

“Awww.” Fizzy singsongs “poor Louis, his sisters see through him so well.” Then she turns the radio up, wholly uninterested about their discussion. 

After the recital, Daniel takes his new family to an ice cream shop, where they run into Gemma. She’s picking up a big tub of ice cream for the holidays, she coos at the twins pink tutus and promises to send her love to her family too.

Saturday they paint eggs and on Sunday they hide them, watching in amusement as Louis pretends to help the twins find them and their presents. In the first week of the Easter holidays Louis along with Zayn, Eleanor and Perrie give the new tree house a christening. More people come around to smoke in the treehouse, because Zayn’s father marched into the shed and went livid. Apparently he didn’t like the used condoms, the litters of alcohol and rubbish inside the shed. Until he leaves after Easter, Zayn has forbidden anyone from coming to his place. The following week he goes shopping with his sisters. Buys himself a couple of new pants in which his bum looks glorious, ‘I think the sun shines out of your arse,’ Lottie had said. Needless to say they immediately went into his shopping cart. He spends a lot of time with his mum, constantly cautious of getting his friendship with his mother back, there is just so much he is hiding from her by now. He feels guilty. Very guilty. The last Sunday of the holidays all the girls were tucked in between Louis and Jay on the sofa listening to the sweet voice of their mother reading a fairy tale. “You’ve been so sweet this holiday, love. Thank you for all your help.”

“Welcome.” Louis whispers back. He looks over to Dan, who is pretending to sleep with Fizzy tucked on his chest. “Mum, there is so much that I can’t tell you, I don’t know how to tell you.” 

She looks like she wants to sit up, but reprimands herself, or she’d accidentally startle the twins. “There is nothing you can’t tell me.”

“I know,” he sniffles. “I just can’t, not right now.”

“Okay well take one advice from me okay?” She grabs his hand over Daisy’s head “Don’t give up. You can do it day by day. After all Diamonds don’t fall to dust.” 

💚🍑💙

School starts up again and waking up on time turns out to be a real pain. After realising that he had barely spent any time with Liam during the holidays, on the next Wednesday during lunch they try to meet up. He’s not quite sure why Liam decided to meet in the Choir room, but he decides to smoke a cigarette on his favourite spot, the open rotunda. He can hear voices from inside both rooms and realises that the Choir isn’t practising today. He hears voices from inside and stumps out his cigarette, knocking against the glass. A blonde boy pushes back the curtain previously obscuring his view, he tries to open the glass door, but seems to fail. Finally, he drags open the door. 

“Sorry mate. Damn door you know. How are you?” They hug. Niall isn’t in his year, and they don’t share any classes, therefore he barely sees the Irish on a daily basis, except for footie practice.

“You looked great at St. Patrick’s!” Zayn says on the floor, Louis looks down at him and sees that he is sketching someone. Someone with big intimidating eyes and a headscarf. 

“Thanks, Z.” Harry says from his spot. “Hi, Lou.” He adds timidly, when he sees Louis looking at him.

“Hey Harry.” _You look good._ Harry is biting his bottom lip staring up at him.

“You went to St. Patrick’s?” Louis asks Niall curiously, sitting down next to Zayn.

“Yeah, yeah, in Manchester, Harry went with me, didn’t you? Got on _too well_ with a Leprechaun.” Niall scoffs clearly amused by the memory. 

“He had a fake beard, I needed to try it out.” Harry defends himself.

“You literally ripped it off of his face.” Niall tsks. Liam comes into view, killing the discussion.

“You look ridiculous, the fuck are you wearing?” 

“Going for cool actually.” Louis looks unimpressed. Liam is wearing pants two times bigger than his actual size, which are pooling at his loose trainers. His T-shirt is so large it could be designed as a dress. “Not good?”

“Deffo not.” Both Zayn and Louis accuse in unison just like the twins when they agree on something without looking at each other. “Why are you dressed like an idiot, Liam?” Louis asks standing up to circle him to inspecting him. Just like Lottie had done while she was shopping with him.

“Great, great, that’s exactly what I was going for.”

“He wants to impress Mrs Cole.” Harry says from his spot on the floor. He’s also wearing street clothing instead of a uniform.

“Hah.” Louis barks a laugh, “you fancy a teacher, Payno?” 

“Shut up. I don’t.” It’s weak but there, “I have a girlfriend.”

“And a dirty fantasy.” Niall chortles, stuffing undefinable food in his big mouth. The boys join his laughter and Harry snickers into his hand, trying to hide that loud sound that he barks when he laughs for real. 

“You don’t look much better.” Liam tries to defend himself, staring at the tired Louis. 

“Excuse me?” Louis snickers while taking a sip of his tea cup.

“Your hair is the greasiest ugliest thing under that beanie, when’s the last time you showered?” He stares down at Louis’ uniform. “And those socks, you always wear socks of abomination.”

“They are speckles, mate.” Louis grins. “Also have a speckle hoodie and a speckle joggers.” He wiggles his feet in his direction, amused as he shows off his grey socks with white speckles over it. He observes Liam for a minute, who is still looking too smug with his own look “I mean maybe a slightly higher hat.” Louis grabs the snap-back on Liam’s head and readjusts it so that it looks even more stupid, grinning proudly when he gets a chuckle from Zayn. “Fringe down, that. You look a little more bad now!” 

“I am bad.” Liam agrees. 

Harry watches the scene with big green eyes, and pouty lips finally interjecting “your fly is open,” he looks Liam up and down a smirk forming on his lips “like genuinely wide open.” Liam looks down at himself and re-adjusts while Louis snickers into his tea. Proudly looking at Curly over the rim of it. Harry smiles back, but there is a tired sadness to his big green eyes. 

“Fine, then I should wear something different right?”

“YES!” All boys call.

“Why are you making a fashion show?” Louis asks when Liam pulls his shirt off, Louis tries not to check out Liam’s biceps “and why are you out of uniform?” He points towards Harry who is wearing a grey chequered shirt over a white T with a blue-grey-red headscarf keeping his delicious curls out of his face.

“He’s thinking about signing up to the Choir to be closer to Mrs Cole.” Niall laughs, “Harry here is supposed to judge if he’ll be able to impress his long-lost love.”

“Fuck off.” Liam calls bending over a backpack full of clothes.

“What about you?” Louis asks Harry.

He turns a little pale, clearing his throat he tells him “waiting for mum to bring me a clean set of uniform shirts.” Louis is about to ask something when he sees that Harry hangs his head, nervously playing with his cross necklace. He can sense that Curly doesn’t want to elaborate, maybe it’s the embarrassment of what happened or the embarrassment of having to tell Louis, either way he decides to shut up.

He sits down next to Zayn and observes the painting. The boy in the painting looks strong, yet fragile. Angry but sad, thoughtful and hurt. Like he has a million things to say, but is to kind or held back to actually utter it. He looks up to look at the boy across from them, his face is slack like he’s been crying, his eyes are big and inquisitive, darting nervously around. Harry looks drained and tired, like someone is taking his fight. The energy in him shifts again, making him angry, so angry. The sizzling returns to his veins, gives him goosebumps, and he has to scratch himself to get the nerves out of his arms. Trying to shake the gnawing feeling.

“You excited to play the falcons?” Jade beams during maths. They have a substitute teacher today who chooses to sleep off his hangover in the front of the class, which meant that Jade and Louis could play their minesweeper phone game openly. Finally, a game in which Louis is better than Jade.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” He nods along. “Should be fun. You coming right?” Jade nods. 

“Of course.” She smiles.

“Did you hear we have a mascot now?” Sophia asks to their left. She’s a dark-haired, long-legged beauty that is sort of friends with Eleanor. She hangs around the footie team a lot, some are saying she has a small crush on Liam, but that is hearsay.

“Seriously?” Jade asks unbelieving, leaning over Louis back to talk to Sophia. “What is it?”

“Well a Crusader, like a knight with a visor and sword. Apparently it’s all red.” Sophia picks up her tote bag and rummages through it, “got a picture somewhere.” She finds her phone and pulls up a picture showing it to Jade.

“Who the fuck would walk around in that?” Jade sounds a little horrified. She sits back to show it to Louis. Louis is staring at a red and white coloured knight. 

“Well, that’s from last nights game…”

“Wait, I was there.” Louis interjects. Sophia stares at him. “I was the weirdo wearing a Pinnock jersey…You know supporting Leigh-Anne and Perrie.”

“Yeah, I saw you, Zayn was wearing an Edwards shirt right?” 

“Nah, that was Payne.” Louis re-buckles, Sophia hums. “But I didn’t see the mascot there.” 

“That might be because she spends most of her time flirting with Harry…or trying to anyway.” 

“Harry?” Louis asks at the same time as Jade asks “SHE? What woman would commit suicide like this?” Louis is fine with Sophia answering that question too, he needs to know who he’s up against here.

“Taylor.” Is all Sophia says.

“Taylor? In fifth from? Taylor Swift?”

“Yep.” She pops the ‘p’.

“She trying to pull Harry?” Louis asks, trying to sound less invested in the question than he actually is, accidentally triggering a mine on the game. He lost. _Shit_.

“Ye-‘p’.”

“But he’s gay.” Jade stretches the vowels. 

“She thinks she can turn him… I dunno. She keeps talking about his curls.” Sophia shrugs and Louis hands over the phone again, the screen has already gone dark. He can feel his tummy clenching and feel the green dragon appear in his insides. He doesn’t know Taylor, but she just got into his line of fire.

Louis walked into the changing rooms, slowly stripping out of his clothes and into his jersey. He watches Ashton make a bicep show in the far right of the room. “You’re so full of shit Ash!” 

“What did u say?” His face scrunches into amusement looking at Louis’ annoyed face, whose eyes are twinkling deep blue. 

“Saw Styles with that Taylor chick, no way did he suck ye off!”

Some in the team snickered, one of them laughed “the bitch that plays our mascot, really?” 

“Hey Willie! Shouldn’t have gotten her that huge teddy bear on Valentine’s Day. Told you she’d be over you in a second.” 

“She never put out did she?” Josh mirths.

Laughter broke out, but Louis was still facing off with Ashton, not letting him out of his sight. “No way did ye square Styles.” Ashton’s nose was widening like a bull. Louis just needed to probe the red flag a little longer, and he’d take off! _Come on you big fat stupid piece of bull, take the bait._ He saw Niall clenching his fist somewhere in the adjacent surroundings. 

“I did too.” 

“Prove it.” _This way little bull c’mon_. 

“Show him the picture Ash! He’ll be the last out of everyone to see it!” Ashton looked unsure, his wish to prove himself against Louis colliding with his fear for the other Styles. And there was also another underlying fear, something Louis hadn’t discovered yet. A shove from another teammate finally did it. 

“That’s enough!” Niall screamed and surges forward, but he was simply ignored as the entire locker room huddled around them, effectively blocking his view and tried to gauge Louis' reaction. 

“That’s the little fag right there.” Ashton phone was thrust into his hand. And there he was… _my beautiful boy_. A scene he knew too well: his lips were stretched and chapped, cheeks flaming from use, curls sticking out and his eyelids falling partly closed as he drunkenly looked up. Louis could feel his cock twitch, _oh baby_. 

“Mate, you sure they can call that a cock?” There is a sudden silence, then the room chants into barking laughter. The team that had been holding its breath keeled forward laughing into the stunted air. Niall gave him a surprised look, a laugh on his lips. In fact the last few minutes were the first where he didn’t see the Irish boy laugh or break a stupid smile. Ashton was grabbing for his phone while his embarrassment was showing through the absolutely red head he was sporting by now. 

He tried to persuade the group “come on you all know that’s not true. All ye seen the picture!” Louis dodges out of his view and because he is smaller he evades Ashton a few times while he is getting very annoyed. 

“As you said mate I’ll be the last to see it.” Louis presses delete as he thrusts the phone back into Ashton’s hand. 

“Hey that was my last copy.” Louis grinned, _excellent news_. “What you on about Tommo?” The team quieted down as they watched mesmerised, even though Louis hadn’t been the first to stand up to Ash, that picture was Ashton’s pride. He got the gay boy to kneel for him, everyone around here knew it too. Louis thought for a moment, _I need to make this about something else, make it about me_. Then he punches Ashton into the face, a crack signals a clean break. Blood starts pouring out of him and instead of retaliating, Ashton comically tries to sweep up the blood. “Don’t ever touch one of the Styles’ again. Don’t make fun of the fags or the next boy to kneel is you.”

“Who do you think you are? I run this team!” Ashton wheezes through his broken nose. 

“Nah.” Louis leans down towards him, it could be dangerous how close he is to Ashton, but he’s too mentally wounded by being matched that he just looks straight into Louis eyes. “Your not the captain, you never were, the captain is Sandy, and he’s getting back his team! You don’t run the show any more!” It was the low whisper of a threat but when Louis walked out of the changing room, his teammates made a hole for his exit, paring against the wall to make an alley for him to pass through. 

“What the hell happened to Irwin?” Gemma starts at Niall, who was running up to her. Ashton just walked on the pitch with a white nose guard, making him look hideous, worse than Liam in Hip-Hop clothes. Niall gives her a small kiss on the cheek. Harry’s face scrunches up on the hideous memory of Niall and Gemma hocking up over the last summer when Niall hadn’t met Barbara yet, and he was new in town. “ ’t was Tommo that was!” 

“Really? Didn’t count him as a fighter.” She plays with Niall’s hand in hers.

“Well actually there is even better news!” He turns to look at Harry, who looks nervous.

“What?”

“Tommo deleted the bj picture.” Gemma’s jaw drops and Harry tries to hide his distress by shifting on his seat uncomfortably. He’s mumbling something about it not being true. “I saw it, he deleted the picture, and then he punched Irwin. Told him that Sandy’s the captain and to stand back. There’s no more picture Haz, promise.” Harry lets the tear drop from his green eyes. Gemma cheers loudly and tucks her brother into her side. Niall leans over the barricade and kisses Harry’s head. “Love you, mate.” 

Louis observes Gemma after her cheer rippled through the dense air around him. Y _ou know what he’d really appreciate? If you found a way to delete that bloody picture!_ Louis remembers Jade’s words from 7 weeks ago. He lets himself look at Harry leaning his curls into his sisters neck, shoulders shaking slightly. “You did good, you know?” Liam pats him on the back using Louis as a balance to stretch. Louis faces him and does the same.

“He’s going to kill me.” He nudges his chin towards Ashton. “That’s odd.” 

“Not really, his mother and siblings still live in Stockport. He’s probably just saying hi to someone he knows.” Liam comments, once his eyes land on Ashton talking to a Falcon player. Something like dread settles in Louis gut, this ain’t going to be good.

And it wasn’t. During the 37 minutes of the first half, Liam runs the ball in a forward pass from the penalty line to Louis on the far right. Louis easily picks it up and tries to dribble forward, but he gets tackled, body checked forward the person behind him. Louis loses balance and falls forward with his hands stretched out in front of him. His hands burn from the gravel of the turf, falling on top of the ball it punches him in the stomach. It hurts more than he can admit, but the referee has already blown his whistle. The falcon drops to his knees “hurts being the bottom don’t it?” 

And now he’s stomped over the line. He’s gone too far, Louis’ head snaps up and the sizzling in his skin pores into his eyes. He doesn’t notice that he tackles the boy like a wrestler, punching him to the floor, beating him once, twice with his fists. The whistles blow next to his ear multiple times and then there is an arm slung around his chest, pulling him off of the Falcon who is grinning at him. Liam is holding Louis upright flush against his chest and Niall’s hands are holding him roughly by his chest against Liam. “Calm down, Calm it Tomlinson!” Niall tries to rationalise.

“What’s wrong with you, first Ashton now this no name?” Liam whispers into his right ear, presumably sharing a look with Niall, since Niall is looking over Louis’ shoulder. 

The Ref holds a red card up “Number 28 off the pitch! I’m baring you from the next two matches.” Louis rips himself free and runs off the pitch, his chest is heaving when Winston grabs a hold of his arm. 

“What happened?” 

“Provoked me, Coach.” 

Winston nods “in that case get thicker skin Mr Tomlinson.” 

“Yes, Sir.” He scoffs and sits down on the bench, his chest still heaving. He tries to ignore the stares from the bleachers, while the nurse starts patching up his broken knuckles. Ashton is grinning as much as he can beneath the constriction of a broken nose.

💚🍑💙

Needless to say, Jay confronts Louis about his foul that night. She is thinking about reinstating his house arrest like she had warned him she would. “Mum he was insulting me, I need to defend myself! You taught me that!” 

“By beating him?”

“He hurt me first.” Louis argues, tears are stinging in his eyes. _Everything is unfair, so unfair._ He winces “it’s just me karma mum.” 

“Boo?” She sits down on his bed and takes him into her arms, “what does that mean? Louis, you have to start talking to me or I won’t be able to help you.”

He nods “There was something the bullies used to continue bullying someone close to me.” Louis starts flicking his tears away, _why am I crying?_ “Someone I care about.”

“Oh okay.” She hears the implication in his voice, but doesn’t dare to ask if he’s in love or not. After all ‘care about’ is a rather large range. “Very cryptic sweetheart.”

“I destroyed that evidence minutes before the game started,” he sniffles. “The person I took it from instructed the other player to attack me on the pitch.”

“Honey, who was this?”

“Can’t tell you.” He whispers, “but I promise mum. I did good. I did the right thing and then got fucked.”

“Language Boo.” She rubs his back. 

“Please don’t punish me for doing the right thing, just once, since coming here.”

“Oh boo… I… how can I help you?” But Louis curls in on himself in her lap, while she cradles through his greasy hair. Dan comes in and stares at the two. 

“I think we should let this one slide…” He tells his fiancé. “His punishment has already been set, I mean he’s stuck on the bench the next two games, and they’re about to get into the final weeks and the championship. So I vote for letting him off the hook at home.”

“Parenting isn’t about voting, dear.” Jay’s eyebrows come into one line. “But since you seem to be adamant about your point, love, I think I’ll agree. Cautiously agree. I’m still watching you boo.” 

He gives himself time to wallow in his sorrow for the day. He wished he could say that he’d finally let all of his aggression out, but sadly Louis quickly felt that, after a day or two, the angry energy returned to his skin. A little less loud, but still present. 

“You got anything planned for summer?” Eleanor asked, while passing Louis his tea.

“Haven’t thought about it to be honest.” Louis replied as he watched her slurp on her frappuccino, he teased her again “ye sure your dad don’t own a Starbucks?” 

“Sod off.” She giggles. “So, maybe we could do something together during summer, how about that?” 

Louis is not sure if he can handle that long with her, “I’ll think on it.”

She doesn’t look pleased, but doesn’t push it, because Michael and Hemmings are walking towards them. “You still alive, Tommo?” 

Louis dramatically pats himself down, “holding up better than Ash, don’t I?”

“Guess you’re still waiting for the duelling aye?”

“Duelling? The battle is over mate. My boy won.” Eleanor giggles again. Michael and Luke share a look. “What?”

Luke jerks “John’s still in town.”

“So?”

“When his dad’s here, Ashton ain’t going to lift a finger.” Michael tries to explain, but Louis still won’t look at his face. Only his voice brings his blood to a boiling point.

“He can try.” Louis exclaims annoyed.

Luke smirks “you crazy, I like this guy.”

“Shouldn’t you be with him? Ye know protect his nose?” Louis looks at Luke, someone he dares to call his friend since Easter. 

Luke snickers, but points over Louis’ shoulder, “why don’t you say that to his face?” Louis turns to see Ashton approaching with Calum in tow. His broken nose had been held in place on the pitch by a face mask, which he technically did not need for his everyday life, but it made him look burly and mean. He wore it to school to intimate anyone who dared to think of him as weak now. And it worked, people still made room for him, Calum looked like a clown. His black hair was growing out again, making his hair black and white. _Clown_.

“Tomlinson.” He roared once he took a stand in front of the other four. 

“Irwin. Got something to say?” Louis tried making himself taller, but Ashton was intimidating and stood higher than him. But it has been about a week since the incident, and he hadn’t retaliated against Louis yet, which gave him hope. They also didn’t have any games since then and in practice they stay to their own set of friends. Louis might or might not have dodged the showers for a while just to be sure.

“Luke your hair looks like an adolescent lion.” He says instead, there is an underlying anger to him and suddenly Louis is afraid that he is just like him. What if his own anger outgrows him, and he has no other choice but to kneel to it. Lash out at people that have nothing to defend themselves, that don’t even deserve it? “Have you seen your acne, I mean…c’mon.” He says to Michael just as rudely. A hand on Louis’ wrists signals to him to stay calm and leave it alone. “What you staring at?” He calls over Louis’ shoulder, for a second he’s happy it’s not him getting the rut of his anger. “You staring at Tommo’s arse?” Louis turns around to a girl shivering and running off, adjusting her glasses.

“Oh come off it.” Michael tries to defuse the situation, but Ashton just submerges him with his tiny crooked eyes. Like a dog he catches something out of the corner of his eyes and harshly grabs Eleanor’s frappuccino from her. In a quick motion he angles his arm and the liquid spill in a curving motion on the person trying to pass them. 

“Oh my god.” He hears a girl call. Someone sputters and coughs, meanwhile Calum is howling with laughter. 

“Ow…” A voice says with shakiness still trying to understand what happened to him.

“Now don’t cry Styles.” Ashton says with a clenched jaw, “don’t want to end up on the floor again do we?”

“Oh you prick.” Eleanor calls, just like in the first week Louis had been here. El wants to run after Harry, but Curly manages to hide in a boys toilet. 

Louis hands his tea to Eleanor “Go. I’ll see you later.” When he opens the door Harry is already washing his face, trying to get the ice out of the curls stuck to his forehead. 

“Shit, are you okay?” Harry doesn’t reply with his face over the tap, but Louis can feel the dumbness of that question. “Let me…” he says and grabs some paper from the hand towel dispenser. “Here…” he holds it out to Harry, who had started unbuttoning his uniform shirt, his face and curls are drenched in water. He halts in his move to grab the paper out of Louis’ hand and pats his face with it, but he still hasn’t said anything. His strong shoulders are falling in on themselves, making him smaller than he is. The cross necklace shimmer when he finishes unbuttoning himself. _And he has tattoos,_ a rush of something goes through him. “Do you need a shirt or something… I don’t think I have one with me, but maybe in my footie gear…somewhere…?” Louis is rubbing the back of his neck thinking out loud. His eyes dart to the right-hand corner going through his mind for an inkling of a memory, but mostly trying not to stare at Harry’s six-pack that is on display right now. Or his V line, _God, thank Liam for making this boy work out to get a pleasure trail!_

“It’s okay.” Harry says controlling his voice to a stoic nonchalance. “I carry an extra.” When Louis faces him again, he’s rewarded with the sight of Harry’s white skin stretching over taunt back muscle. He’s going through his stuffed light brown leather bag that is filled to the brim. He seems to have found what he needs and turns back to put it on. _He really does have a six-pack,_ Louis thinks. _And three… no, no wait… four nipples?_

“How can I help?” Louis questions, tearing his blues off of the boys chest and into his greens.

“Don’t. You done enough.” Harry says hushed. Louis very humbly agrees, the way that Harry said is more accusatory than he hoped for. Louis is about to open his mouth, when Harry continues “stop helping me please.” 

“Always so polite, Curly.” He just had to tease him, but then his face scrunched up “wait why?”

Harry stops re-buttoning the shirt halfway to look up at him “Turns out you deleting that picture made things worse for me!”

“What?” Louis says in disbelief.

“You actually think Ashton was going to let me go and I’d live a happy sixth form life, maybe even enjoy the last months of fifth form? Nope.” He shakes his curls and stuffs his drenched shirt into his bag. “He takes his aggression out on me worse than ever.” Louis finally deduces there is a reason he keeps an extra shirt with him throughout the day. His stomach clenches like a fist and dread settles down in his veins. He’s not quite sure if it’s better than having anger inside of him or this, this angst that paralyses him.

“I… I’m sorry… I thought this would end.” Louis rubs through his hair, “you know without the evidence….figured he’d finally leave you alone.”

Harry shakes his head “I think it amplified his anger.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“Well at least there’s no more picture, right?” Harry tries to push past him, shouldering his heavy bag, he rounds Louis to dry his hands off one last time before leaving.

“Right.” Louis nods, the angst making him itchy. “Harry…” Harry turns to him. “I really am sorry.”

“Yeah, sure.” Harry shrugs, clearly overacting his true feelings.

“Shit, Hazza! I’m really trying here!” Louis exclaims. In a fast rush forward Harry laces his right hand into Louis’ neck and pushes him against himself. “Mpft” Their lips connect. Harry falls backwards against the wall behind him with a moan. The leather bag is dragging him down, making him smaller and letting Louis tower over him. Harry’s lips are addictive as he remembers. Euphoria spreads through him, replaces that anxiety and lets him breath the boy in that’s attached to him. Harry’s hand leaves the nape of his neck and with a light touch they scan over his neck forward towards his cheek. His fingertips stay there faintly holding the apple of his right cheek with burning tips. His mind goes blank.

Empty. Except for the softness moving against him.

Louis can’t get enough, groaning involuntarily. His hands have been absent-mindedly travelling along Curly’s sides, and he grabs Harry’s left thigh and drags it up against his own right leg. It’s hitched up on his hip, keeping him nailed to the wall and crouching beneath Louis. His ears detect Harry’s little hums, and he presses him further into the wall. _God, do I want to devour him top to bottom_. His hands get a hold of Harry’s love handles. His brain starts working again to ask himself how someone had _a six-pack and love handles at the same time?_ Lips suck against each other as they shift their heads to the other side, realigning and pushing their noses against each other’s cheeks. His muscles lose their tension and soften, there is a hand holding onto his shirt over his heart, trying to pull him closer. 

“You be saying real nice things…” The door flies open, but neither Harry nor Louis have the time to detach in an adequate time. Louis is staring over his shoulder, meanwhile Harry still tucking him flush against himself, breathing against his neck in fast exhales. The warm brown eyes of Liam are staring back at Louis, and Louis gives him a do-you-mind look. Liam pushes the person behind him backwards, “eh…out of order…bathroom, out of order.” Louis grins and turns back to Harry. His green eyes are wider than usual and his thigh is loosening off of his hip. But Louis grabs a hold of it, hitching it back up his thigh. 

“You in a rush?” 

“I don’t know if we should rush into things.” Harry replies. 

Louis farrows his eyebrows “Oh.” But Harry giggles, Louis rolls his eyes fondly and breaks out in a grin of his own. “That’s the worst joke I’ve ever heard, Harold!” To punish him Louis surges forward to bite his bottom lip, letting Harry go pliant. There is a buzzing inside of Louis, and he presses small kisses against his puffy lips. 

Outside he can hear Liam telling someone that the bathroom is occupied, ‘seriously?’ “move on pal!”. Alright maybe Liam isn’t too bad. Harry’s curls tickle him, and he detaches from him with a strong kiss. Harry’s lips have turned cherry red and his pink tongue pokes out to taste the saliva stuck there. “Got to go, love.” Louis gives Harry a kiss where a dimple should appear. Giving Curly’s sides a squeeze, he grabs his rucksack where he had deposited it on the floor. 

Louis swings open the door and Liam falls backwards against him. “You enjoy eavesdropping?” He chuckles into his side.

“Thank you would be nice.” Liam argues face stern. “Hi Harry.”

“Hi.” Harry’s voice is rough.

“Your welcome.” Louis replies. Liam gives him an annoyed shove with his elbows into the ribs. Louis coughed a laugh, when other students rushed in, talking to each other through the stall walls. “Need a lift to footie later?” Louis asks him while they exit the bathroom. Liam just nods and Louis flees. He’s going to have to trust that Liam will keep this between them for the day. _Fingers crossed._

Liam is leaning against Louis’ passenger door, when he exits the school with Zayn. “Oh Tommo, you made a friend.” Zayn chuckles.

“See you loser.” Louis calls back. Liam and Louis get into the car and make the 13-minute drive to the Football Club. 

“I’m glad you’re still coming to practice.” Liam lamely starts the conversation. 

“You mean since I don’t get to play in the round of sixteen?” Louis deadpans, “if we get far enough then maybe I get to play again, yeah?”

“Sounds like a plan.” Liam agrees.

“So you’re not going to say anything right?” Louis asks while fiddles with the radio.

“Your bathroom secret?” Louis gives him an incredulous look, “what do you take me for Louis? Haven’t I proven time and time again that I’m actually a good friend?” Liam sounds hurt and Louis almost feels bad about asking, but then again it was obvious that he would. 

“Of course I’m not going to say anything.” Liam bluffs when they finally arrive after 10 minutes of awkward silence. “But, Louis, I have three sisters, I know how to listen if you should need it.” He stands up and gets out of the car. Louis swallows hard and starts punching his wheel for no reason. No reason at all if it weren’t for the terrible feeling nagging at his limbs. Tell him they scream, let someone in. You have to share your mind, or you’ll explode!

“Thanks.” He tells Liam when he passes him in the changing room.

“Hello.” A man with light hair and a burly figure says, and Louis can swear he remembers seeing him before. “This seat taken?”

“Not yet.” Louis replies, pulling his jumper over his hands. Not because he’s cold but because he’s terribly uncomfortable. Silently they watch the game next to each other. His family didn’t come out this time, which made sense since he was not allowed to play along.

“Here you go.” Barbara plops down next to him, handling him a beer.

“Thanks, darling.” She sits down giving a kiss to his cheek with a shit eating grin. Jade is hot on her heels, and the two girls give the man next to him a once over. 

“You let your girl bring you your beer?” The man asks, there might be a little amusement underlying his statement, but Louis can’t be sure.

“Not dating her!” He points towards Niall “number 8 is her boyfriend. I was suspended for a couple of games, so I appear on the bleachers like a hologram.”

“Aren’t holograms see-through?” Jade asks, pushing her round glasses up on the bridge of her nose “and like not present and all?” 

“She’s right.” The man says.

“You just undermined my point Thrillwall!” Louis accuses and smirks with his next idea “that’s at least one full on win on my math-game-tally!” Jade scoffs an ‘yeah right’ next to him.

“So your Tomlinson?” The man asks.

“Yeah, yeah,” Louis says cheery, but that dies down quickly when he sees the man forcefully clasping his hands and rubbing them against each other. “Louis. It’s Louis Tomlinson!” 

“Good.” The man replies. He gives Louis a side eye, and that’s when he remembers him. On the bleachers, fourteen days ago, towering over Harry and Michael in the rain. “You broke my son’s nose.” _Shit_! 

“Well I…it’s just that…” Louis starts. He can feel Barbara and Jade tensing next to him, they already knew who he was.

“Hush Boy. I like the first impression I had of you, don’t ruin it!” Louis unnecessarily nods. “I only came to say thank you.” He continues to Louis bafflement.

“Excuse me?”

John Irwin continues, “you also got rid of that picture didn’t you?” It was a rhetorical question, so Louis decided just to nod uselessly. “When Des told me what my son had done to his, I tried to destroy all copies but I seem to have failed. You see my kid was cruel enough to send it over to his best friend Calum. And that copy lived on so to speak.”

“I see.” Louis says dumbfounded, the outraged cries of a foul goes under when he continues listening to Ashton’s father speak.

“I promised Des to get some sense into the boy, but working for a job that makes you leave your home weeks, sometimes months at a time, is not exactly perfect for raising a child. I think part of why he’s so cruel to that boy is because he’s aware of my connection to his father. He thinks he’s punishing me by doing this.” John looks away from his hands towards Louis “So thank you for punching him. You have my blessing to do it again.” Louis’ jaw drops when John stands up and gives him a pat on the shoulder. And just like he came, he leaves.

“Did that just happen?” Louis asks Barbara.

“I do believe so.” The girls stare at each other and then at Louis.

“To be honest, I thought he’d rip you to shreds, mate.” Jade’s eyes are bulging behind her glasses.

“Yeah me too. Did you see his hands?” Louis whispers. Barbara nods vigilantly so that some of her curvy hair falls out of her ponytail.

“So we get to knock him about a bit, yeah?” Jade squeals excitedly. She claps her hands into each other. The other two have to laugh, but it all goes under from a goal that jersey number 8 made. Later they all lie and cross their hearts that they saw Niall ‘truly amazing’ goal. 

The Crusaders pass the round of sixteen by mid of May. The away game had taken place a week after the home game, since Louis had a car he had driven four chatty Crusader’s girlfriends to Delph. Though he had refused to take the mascot with him, for undefinable reasons of course. With a tie against the Delph Harpies, therefore a rather uneventful game, the Crusaders passed into the Quarter-final. It also meant that for the next game against the St. Helen’s Magpies Louis could participate in the game again.

Harry lifts the ball with the tip of his toes and pops it in the air a few times before stretching his long leg behind him to take a shot. It’s pretty shallow when it flies towards Liam, who easily catches it. “Good lad, good lad, better luck next time.” Louis says the fond still present in a v shaped smirk. Liam and Niall had the idea to go play footie in the park, after Louis had to sit out the day before. Niall naturally brought Harry with him and Louis brought Zayn. Louis was trying to dampen the shit eating grin that was on his face. Harry looked really cute is the problem, with a white beanie and a black t-shirt with the enticing slogan ‘Fuck R ⍟ ugh’.Not that Harry was particularly good at footie, but his white clad legs kept stumbling like a baby giraffe and his face looked like a frog when he was having fun.

“Stop cheering on the wrong team, mate!” Liam exclaims annoyed. But Louis can’t help himself, when it’s about Harry he can’t help but want to be on his side.

Louis gets the ball thrown to him by Liam, and he dribbles around Zayn, kicks it a little forward and takes a step back to properly propeller it against Niall. His limp wrists flicker, and he can feel his bum jiggle from the hard shot. But he can’t make himself care if someone notices his flamboyant expressions, tonight he’s surrounded by friends who don’t seem to care. The ball bumps off of Niall’s hands and right in front of Harry’s feet who aims it at Liam. “YES!” 

“Oh Payno!” Louis shrugs his head from side to side. “Alright, alright, enough cheering you losers.” 

“Oh you don't want to touch this glove I've just spit in it.” Liam says when he passes Louis the gloves. 

“Right on disgusting, aren’t ye?” Louis grins, putting on the gloves and running after Liam. He doesn’t see it coming, rubbing his gloves all over his face. “There you are. Bathe in your own filth Lili.”

“Lewis!” Liam falls to the ground to crawl away on his back, but Louis straddles him and continues. 

“Quick, Harry! Let’s kick off without them.” Zayn squeals, seeing his first real good attempt. 

“Hey!” Louis gets to his feet and runs towards the makeshift goal. He skitters along the floor and just barely touches the ball, it flies to the cross-walk. “YES! The Tommo is back!” He screams and makes a little victory jiggle and spits into his gloves. Liam is clapping for him and Louis bends forward in a bow. He rubs the gloves against each other with glee in his eyes “Oh I am back.”

Zayn returns with the ball and gives it over to Louis. Louis passes to Liam, who accidentally shots Harry in the face, but he’s able to turn himself and gets shot in the back instead. Harry scores on him and Liam pushes the ball back towards Louis at kick off. Louis gets out of the goal to take the pass, since there are only two on his team playing against the other three. Louis gives the ball up to Liam, who almost gets tackled by Zayn. Liam sees it coming and passes it back quickly, but automatically falls on top of Zayn, who groans loudly. Harry is in his view and Louis kicks, scoring on Niall. “With the left foot mate!” Louis calls alighted.

Louis runs back to his goal and Harry takes a quick shot at Louis from across the ‘field’. Louis is prepared and simply goes into his knees to parade the ball. “I feel like with my knowledge and understanding of the football game, I feel like I should be much better at it.” Harry says gesticulating and laughing at Louis so that his dimples pop out adorably. Harry’s about to walk away, but turns around again to see if Louis is smiling at his joke while he digs his hands in the waistband of his trackies. 

“That’s what Daddy would say.” Louis taunts, while Harry's mouth stands ajar, and he licks his bottom lip. Louis rips the Velcro strip of his gloves apart to readjust the tightness. Proudly Louis notices that Harry follows the notion downwards while looking at him overwhelmed. Admittedly Harry’s face also blushed ashamed of saying something a man twice his age would say. Louis passes towards Liam and the two share a few passes between each other, until Louis shoots it a little too high and Liam completely dives for it. The thing is the ball was probably at knee height and Louis completely stage dived for it, his head did touch the ball with no control over it whatsoever, causing it sailing miles high off the goal. “Alright boys I went for it. I believed in myself like you said.” Liam says lying on his stomach, Louis is towering over him with his hands on his hips snickering. 

“Alright fair enough.” Louis says with a shit eating grin. Liam reaches out his hand again, and Louis helps him up, “you realise you just grabbed a full gobble of my spit again.” 

“Fuck sake Louis,” Liam calls. “Selfish bastard.”

“Good, let’s make this count.” Niall passes the ball directly to Zayn. Who accidentally passes it causing it to lift off high, Harry catches it with the outside of his foot passing towards Niall. Niall outplays Liam by letting the ball fall behind his back and uses his heel to kick it back to Harry. And Harry chest traps it and volleys it into the goal. Louis is paralysed realising that Harry just scored on him, the first of the entire night. Niall screams and goes to grab the ball behind him. He takes it and runs past Louis and Liam towards Harry who is making a weird giraffe dance. Niall places the ball in front of his feet and the two fall on the surrounding ground, laughing terribly high. 

“Still lost.” Liam says with a fond eye roll.

“Not about winning or losing Payner.” Harry chuckles once he’s sitting up.

Liam helps Niall up and Zayn joins them legarly. “I’m here with Danielle's scooter if someone needs a lift home.” Zayn lifts his hand quicker than any other and starts rolling a blunt.

“Might have to make a pit stop, though.” Liam gives him an are-you-serious-look, but Zayn doesn’t notice he is occupied in his blunt turning.

“Let’s go.” Niall says to Harry grabbing his stuff.

Louis turns to Harry as well “I’ll come with ye, going the same direction yeah?” Harry nods biting his bottom lip, trying to wilt his smile. Niall claps into his hands trying to deflect off of his weirdly awkward best friend. Niall makes a motion to say bye to the other two.

“Where’s your car then?” Niall asks.

“It’s in the shop.” Louis shrugs as they come to a halt at a street of lane way houses diligently standing next to each other. Red brick houses with white windows that lined up to showcase the view of a pocket park at the end of the alley.

“Sucks.” Niall says as he starts jiggling with keys. “This is me. Have fun you two, don’t get mugged.”

“Bye.” Harry chirps. Louis waves and the two head off to the small park, it’s usually used by residents for dog walking. It’s also the fastest way to get to Harry’s house in Holmes Street.

Harry stops at the beginning of the park to stare at a small placard. Louis steps next to him to read it as well, there is a tiny picture attached to it which looks like a doggy poop bag. ‘Dog lovers be aware, poison baits illegally deposited! 10’000 pounds for any information.’ Turns out the picture is supposed to show evidence of the poisoned baits. Louis lets out a gush of air and takes a look at Harry who is still staring at it. “That’s terrible.” Harry states.

“Awe, you’re not actually welling up are you Curly?” Louis grins.

“Shut up. I’m not!” 

“Sure you are.” Louis jumps onto his back and laughs at Harry’s clumsiness when he falls forward. He places a hand on the placard attached to the tree and turns his face, bumping Louis’ nose against his cheek.

“Carry me.” Louis demands, patting Harry’s ass below his own, almost falling off himself. Harry grunts miffed, but grabs Louis thighs to secure them tighter around his hips. Louis pokes his cheeks “you aren’t too bad Styles, not bad at all.”

“At being a horse?” Harry questions unbelieving.

“Trust me, if you’ve seen a lot of horse shows by now, you’re doing excellent.” Harry honks a laugh, open and honest. Unlike he usually does, he can’t secure his hand over his mouth to muffle it and Louis happens to love it. He makes it his mission to hear it more often. 

  
“It’s all about the person we’re carrying.” Harry giggles anticipating the joke he’s about to make upon his new horse-affinity, Louis is willing to indulge him. “You’re a little koala, Lou.”

“Shut it.” Louis tries to knee him, but Harry is still holding tight onto his knees. He’s giggling. It’s annoying. Louis decides to tickle his sides instead. Harry breaks out a laugh, _huh ticklish then_. He becomes more vicious. “Take it back, I’m tall.” 

“No you’re tiny.” Harry giggles, he winds out of his arms and let’s go off Louis’ knees.

“Wha-“ Louis squeals, losing his balance on Harry.

“Shit.” Harry is able to catch him by his middle and gets him vertically trapped to his chest. “Sorry, sorry, sorry.” Harry squeals, clasping him to his chest. Louis is laughing now, his feet dangling off to the side, he can feel Harry’s breath tickle his neck. He whispers “baby koala.” to Louis’ neck and the heat spreads all the way to his toes. 

“Let me go, Harrah.” Louis can’t help but giggle.

“No. You’re very light too.” Harry clarifies, finally lifting his face out of Louis’ neck.

“Let go, you stomping giraffe!” 

“Whoa now! I was a horse just a minute ago.” Harry complains. “And neither stomp. Take it back!” 

“You’re weirdly offended by this.” Louis snickers. Harry relocates his hands and throws Louis (he definitely does not give off a tiny squeal thank you very much) into a bridal style hold. 

“Ugh,” Louis complains “I feel very unmanly right now.”

“Don’t worry I’ve seen your manliness.” Louis punches the chest in front of him at the insinuation.

“Your getting cocky. Don’t know if I like this Harold.” He dramatically shakes his head.

“Tough luck.” Harry strides on with his long legs “Get used to it.” Which causes the smaller man to chuckle. Louis’ fingers start trailing up Harry’s arm, and he feels Harry’s goosebumps erupting. “Didn’t know you have this many tattoos.” Harry doesn’t say anything, but grabs Louis a little tighter so that his biceps grow a little in front of Louis’ nose. “Your mum allowed this?”

“You don’t like them?” Harry asks, avoiding the question.

“Never really liked tattoos to be honest.” Harry’s face falls a little so Louis hurries to say “I might get persuaded, though.” Harry looks down at him blushing slightly.

“Does that have something to do with me?”

“You’ll never know.” Louis sasses back, his voice immediately softens “what do they mean?”

“Oh.” Harry stops walking. “You really want to know? Their kind of personal.” 

Looking into Harry’s wide green eyes he hears himself weakly speak up “Don’t have to, but yeah.” 

Harry gently puts him down and exposes his inner arm, “This pingu and the padlock I got with one of my close friends in Manchester. This is the logo of the American football team I support, the Green Bay Packers.” 

“I’ve seen you wear those hideous green beanies.” Louis grins staring at the G. _They bring out your eyes._

“This outline,” he points at the star “is my metamorphosis.” He says gently, watching Louis’ awed face. “I might fill it in when I have accomplished you know…my transformation…being myself…being happy with being myself.” 

“I like that.”

“ ‘Won’t stop till we surrender’ that kind of just means I’m stubborn to the bullying.” His cheeks are starting to turn pink from Louis’ intense gaze. “A birdcage, because I’m caged up in my life.”

“There’s no door.” Louis says sadly. 

Harry looks at him baffled at his ability to see the easily missed detail, “no there isn’t.”

“The hanger next to it, was this because you were closeted?” Louis looks at him, he can’t stop his stomach from going into knots. Harry nods more cheery than Louis. 

“Lou, they helped me tell a story when I couldn’t.” He gently bumps Louis’ nose with his index finger, “don’t look so sad. This helps me, you know make it a part of me.” Louis doesn’t look too convinced. “You should try it sometime.”

Louis grunts and starts walking again, he needs to get away from Harry’s skin before he does something stupid again. Like that damn bathroom incident. Now that he knows how good Harry’s skin tastes, he’s afraid he’s becoming an addict to it. 

“I have some for my childhood too, they’re a part of me too.” Louis stays quiet while Harry keeps talking about his ink “A for my mum, an iced gem for Gemma.” He pushes his t-shirt back up to expose his shoulder, leaning over to Louis “and that’s Hebrew for Gemma.” Louis stops to look at it. 

“There’s no way I could do that, I have way too many sisters.” Harry laughs his honk that makes birds fall off of trees. Louis happens to like it. 

“I have a couple more, but nothing big yet.” They push through the last trees of the park and walk down the street.

“Yet?”

“Yeah I really want something big on my chest. Just need something that screams me… you know?”

“Please be sure before you do it.” 

“Mhm.” Harry grins, as they head down through an alley between two dark houses to cut to Holmes Street. Harry’s street. 

“You regret any?” Harry suddenly lifts his shirt. “Whoa whoa…what did I say?”

Harry gives him an amused glare, before pointing to his left breast muscle, there is a love banner on it. “I want to cover this.” 

Louis scrunches up his nose, “what possessed you to get that?”

“Met a boy in a bathroom, felt like it.” The apples of Harry’s cheeks are furiously red now moving down to his neck and Louis swallows around the lump in his throat. How can it be that one meeting caused this boy to tattoo love on his skin. Something he’ll never get rid of. _What kind of an impact did_ I _have on his life, maybe still have?_ “You’ve been really quiet for too long.” Harry whispers once they stand in front of his house. 

“Sorry. Just…” the driveway showcases one large SUV in the dark, no lights are on and it’s getting darker by the minute. He can see the inviting light of Anne’s house and remembers running in and out frustrated over hurting Harry over and over again and now here he stands. Telling Louis his most intimate secrets clear for everyone to see on his skin. Yet a cryptic secret nonetheless, “thanks.” He finally says facing him again, Harry is bobbing from one foot to another. “For telling me all that, thanks.” He nods towards the warm kitchen light “have a good night Haz.” He starts walking again to get home. Home. That sounds weird, home should be Doncaster. Or Anne’s house. _Wait, what?_ _Stupid brain_ taunting him again.

“I’m not dating Michael, Louis!” Harry calls out, he’s looking down at his long fingers. They never talked about that again, even if Louis almost killed the boy a couple of times with his stares. “I help out at this Queer Youth Community Centre in Manchester on Fridays after my dad picks me up from school. Michael showed up. He didn’t know I work there. We talked for a bit, he’s just as confused as the rest of us. He needed someone to hear him out. Obviously you’re not allowed to tell.” Louis belittles the statement with a gush of air leaving his nostrils. _Fucking Michael_.

“Don’t mean you ain’t dating him, Curly. On second thought that really speaks for the fact that you’re dating him.” 

“No.” Harry sounds desperate. “Really we’re not. I’m not attracted to him!”

“Is he to you?” Harry looks taken aback, like he’s thinking about this for the first time. His eyes looking in the sky and his face contorting into a squint. “Well now that you have an admirer, let me know when I can beat his ass.” Louis says while walking backwards laughing at Harry’s awkwardness. Harry’s smile’s shy, biting his lips like he wants to sass back at him, but isn’t quite sure if he can. If he is allowed to. Louis hates that Harry squelches his personality so much around him. 

“I’ll let you know.” 

“Bye Harold.”

“Bye.” His entire body is still in a half lean to the side, and he stretches out his hands in front of him to jiggle his long fingers in an attempt to wave cutely.

Now Louis really needs to make fun of him. “What was that?” 

“What?” His eyes go wide when he sees Louis walk towards him again in quick succession, quicker than he should be with his short legs.

“That jiggly thing with your obscenely large hands.” Louis steps into Harry’s personal space. 

“I didn’t do anything.” Harry squeals, while Louis is already pouncing on him.

“Sure you did.” He takes a hold of Harry, “come on show me again.” 

“No…” Harry giggles, knowing of his weakness now Louis tickles his sides. Louis is begging him to do it again. _Why didn’t I just leave, why did I need to hear his giggles one more time?_

“Just looked so beautifully lame.” Harry is giggling, while Louis attacks his sides. _Remember your addiction? LEWIS, get off of him!_ His mind screams as his eyes scan the dimples and the boy tries to squirm away from him, rotating his hips to weasel out of his fingers’ reach. Louis stops in favour of grabbing Harry’s side harshly, trying to hold on before the taller boy slithers out of reach. He can feel Harry’s intake as the ribs contract, Louis barges forward and gives Harry a hasty kiss. He returns the kiss, and they clumsily walk backwards in an attempt to get closer together. Harry tilts his head to the side, while Louis rams him against the car, barely hearing the sirens from the SUV. Louis traces his lips with his own hips rotating into Harry who was caught off guard, and moans loudly. The theft alarm is still blaring into the darkening night. Their shadowy figures melt into one when Anne opens the door, forcing the gateway to trigger the lighting. “Who’s there?” 

Harry rolls his eyes and tries to twist his face to see if his mother can see him, which is unnecessary since she just asked who is there. Their mouths smack apart and Louis’ lips slide along his sharp jaw, unable to follow Harry’s lips so fast. “Fuck No.” Harry whines a whisper, when Anne calls out to them again. Louis bites Harry’s neck, feeling his pulse run a marathon against his teeth.

“Just me mum.” 

“What you hiding for? Come inside love.” Harry suppresses a moan, pushing his hand against his stomach and up to grab a hold of Louis non-existing pecks. Holding onto his shirt forcefully. The siren dies out when Anne uses her car keys to unlock the SUV.

“She has the worst timing,” Harry complains out of breath. Louis leaves Harry’s new hickey alone and grabs his flushed cheeks to give the boy one lasting kiss to his cherub lip. A moan gets caught in Harry’s throat, and Louis can feel it as a breath exhale against his cheekbone. Their lips detach noisily again, and Louis lets his tongue trace Harry’s bottom lip, they part more widely and Louis starts grinning. 

“You’re delicious.” he whispers, there is a tingling in his groin that’s all too familiar. Instead, he chooses to grab a hold of Harry’s privates while biting his bottom lip at the same time. Harry makes a little “n’ahhaha” noise that Louis absolutely loves. He can feel Harry jump in his hand. “Have fun getting rid of this.” He gives him a quick squeeze and a feathery peck before turning to walk away. “Have a good night Misses Twist.” He calls over the parking space waving at Anne’s stunned face.

“Mum where are your car keys?” Louis cries out scrabbling on the small table next to the door searching. 

“There is no need to scream young man.” Jay calls from the kitchen. Louis turns to see his sisters sitting at the kitchen aisle staring at him with inquisitive faces.

“I need ‘em!” Louis squirms, scratching his knees. His mother’s hands still in her mixing bowl, the twins’ pencils still over their homework and Fizzy’s nail polish hovers over her nail as they all stare at him with blue wide eyes. 

“Are you on something?” Lottie leans backwards over the stool to stare at his crouched figure. 

“That’s not funny Charlotte.” His mother reprimands. 

“MUM!” 

“Jesus Louis. Calm down. They are in my purse.” Louis rounds into the reading room and rummages through her large black bag. There is an awful lot of money in there, but he orbits it to grab the keys. He rounds again to throw open the door. “Now wait a minute, where do you think you’re going?” Louis pretends that he doesn’t hear her and heads to her car. He quickly gets the seat setting adjusted and puts the automatic into drive, almost forgetting to lift the foot break. The car helpfully warns him of this. 

There is so much on his mind. And he finally needs to blow, he can’t keep it in any more. And since there is no one at home that he feels comfortable talking to he drives across town to get to the one person he really wants to see. His heart is racing, making him accelerate too fast.

Louis leaves the car a block away, walked around the house and silently slipped into the shed. He grunts, “Payyynnnooo!?!” He swiped his fringe away and whines “why you here?” 

“Believe it or not I’m friends with Zayn.” 

“I thought you had no friends.” Louis retorts. Everyone knew that Payno had no friends, if rumour had it right for a change, on his 16th birthday no one but his mum showed up to his party. Liam grunts a laugh, but doesn’t retort, which really was _way more annoying_. Louis wishes that Liam wasn’t here, he’s starting to feel that drop in his stomach. Telling him that his is strength and determination from moments ago leaving him. “So where is he?” 

“Zayn?” 

“Obviously!” _Louis’ breath,_ he tells himself. 

“Getting beer from the house and meeting his dealer somewhere around the corner.” 

“That boy doesn’t function without it.” Payne laughs in agreement. Louis was sitting on a couch opposite him, hunched over still dazed and in thought. Zayn had just recently received a new couch, green and ugly. It makes him think about a much more beautiful shade of green in someone’s eyes. 

“We only saw each other half an hour ago, so why’d you come over so late?”

“Could ask you the same thing.” 

Payne grins, _that shit,_ “Yeah you could, but I’m not the one that wants to get something off of his chest.” 

Louis raises his brows, “not to ye, I don’t.” 

“Give it a try,” Liam provokes him. “I have three sisters, I know how to listen.” Louis pondered for a moment, _Harry’s earthquake eyes, Stan not answering his damn phone._

_“_ No one can know.” 

“Promise.” Liam crosses his heart with two fingers. Louis clasped his hands and looked down at them. 

“My best friend is gay.” 

“Okaay?” 

“Shut it, you’re being a pain.” 

“I know.” Liam laughs at his own double entendre. Louis rolled his eyes but there was a small smile on his lips. 

“Me best friend is gay, flirting with guys… not a big deal. You know?” Liam nods but Louis just continues “in Doncaster had this bird, Hannah, she was nice and sweet. We had a bit of slap and tickle. Now Eleanor.” 

“Is this about El?”

“Shut it.” Liam nods dutifully. 

“She’s great, she’s actually a really good friend.” 

“Yeah I know.” 

“Uhh Paynoo… How often do I have to tell you to shut it?” He grunts annoyed. Liam holds up his hands defensively. Louis blurts out, “I just don’t like it, yeah?” There is a pause. 

Liam takes it as an invitation to talk “I don’t know if I follow, Lewis. You don’t like being with girls?” Louis rubs his hands against each other “this about what happened in the bathroom? Cause you seemed rather sure of yourself there.” 

Nervously Louis closes his eyes and lets the cat out of the bag “Harry sucked me off a year ago at a concert, didn’t know him ‘till I walked into his kitchen with me own family…” he pauses again, but Liam was too shaken to react. “Am I gay, Liam?” 

Liam’s eyes went wide, after a while he found his voice again “You know there is no shame in that, right?” Louis was still rubbing his hands together and didn’t meet his eyes. _That’s not a yes or a no!_ “Louis, Louis, look at me. It’s not a choice, it’s who you are. If it’s true or not, there is no shame in that. You’re allowed to be attracted to whoever you are attracted to. And Harry is a pretty boy, no one would blame you.” 

“Don’t talk about Harry!” Louis growls deep like an alpha wolf protecting its mate.

“Jesus, didn’t know you were that protective.”

” ’m not!” 

“Sure, sure. Those curls though right?” Louis gives him another annoyed look that Liam knew too well by now. 

A melancholic smile appears on his thin lips. “Yeah those curls…” Louis weakly trails off. 

“Thanks for waiting lad! Wha-…? Tommo?” Zayn busts through the door and drops down next to him, putting a six-pack on the coffee table. “I thought you had no car? How’d you get here so fast?” Louis looks up to see Liam smile at him over the table, kind and understanding. 

“What I miss?” Zayn asks confused when he looks between Liam and Louis. A silent understanding and Louis can feel his lungs breathing again. 

“Nothing.” Louis says, “Just brainstorming for summer.” 

“What you come up with?” Zayn opens three bears and passes them around.

“I have to help Danielle move to London.” Liam supplies.

“Eleanor wants to do something, but I kind of feel like putting space between me and England you know?”

“No.” Zayn says confused, but he shakes his head, giving Louis a controller and pushes the Mario Kart game into the machine. “Ye know me uncle has a place in Ibiza…I could ask if we can have it for the summer.”

“Thought you said you’re poor.” Louis accuses, amused.

“We are. Me uncle not so much.” He grins. “He hates dad, but he always liked me.” 

“Alright. You ask him then.” Liam says excited slurping on his beer can.

“Maybe we could invite the girls. You know Perrie and Jade?”

“Yeah maybe.” Zayn agrees.

They sit for a while, but Louis chooses to leave after two hours, since he knew his mum would worry. Before he leaves, he gives Liam a nod “Thanks mate.” Liam just raised his half empty beer. _Wanker can’t even finish one beer_. With a fond smile he leaves the shed.

💚🍑💙

_Everything hurts._

_They keep going._

_I try to lift my arms to curl them around my head. Protecting myself as far as I can. There’s an obnoxious pain in my jaw, and it makes a weird crunch sound when I open it to cry out as one of their shoes collides with my stomach. I can feel wet patches dripping down, not sure if it’s water or blood. Everything hurts, “please stop.” I know it’s weak, but my voice can’t lift._

_“Sick pervert…” someone screams. My ears are ringing and I can feel myself drift from the exhaustion. I tried, got in a punch or two. I really tried, but there are so many of them. Had not a chance. My legs hurt too. Someone is stepping on them with cleats. It hurts, another wheezing cry leaves my lips. I can feel the emptiness creep up “…sto-“ paralysed from the pain._

💚🍑💙

Louis’ feet are hitting the floor loudly, and he can feel his lungs burning. It’s just a small way from the car inside, but he’s going as fast as he’s ever done before.

Louis bursts through the door, the glass shivering in its frame. He looks around and realises who has gathered here. One of Dan’s nurses is fussing over someone in the kitchen. Gemma turns around to face Louis, the edge of her lips are pulling down. “What the hell happened?” Louis asks, and everyone turns around to stare at him, past the nurse he sees Harry with a trembling bottom lip. His eyes are glassy and watery, one of them is filled red, which must have something to do with the rest of his eye: blue, green and purple. His jaw is slightly unhinged and the edge of his lip is bleeding. Louis quickly gets back in motion and pushes the nurse out of the way. “Who was this.” 

“Don’t bother he won’t tell us.” 

Louis ignores Robin, “who was this?” Louis grabs his chin gently between his thumb and index finger. His nose also shows parts of dried blood and a tear spills past his left eye, slowly pooling towards Louis’ thumb. “Hazza I need you to tell me. Now! Curly this is serious, tell me who it was!” 

“Ashton. It was Ashton.” Harry admitted in a whisper so that no one heard but Louis.

“Right!” Louis turned around again, grabbing his phone he dialled his WhatsApp group. 

“Lou…please don’t.” He hears Harry ask quietly, but Louis’ already halfway to the door. In his car, the Bluetooth announces that the boys have all picked up.

“What’s up, Tommo?” Niall chirps too happy. 

“It’s baseball time!” Louis introduces, his voice shaking with anger.

“What’s that mean?”

“Means I’m fuming and I will beat the shite out of Ashton and his crew with me baseball bat.” His knuckles go white from the grip he has on the steering wheel.

“Wait, what he do?” Liam asks timidly, already squirmy.

“Beat the shit out of Hazza.” 

“Alright, alright. Let’s do it.” Niall agrees enthusiastically. Everyone affirms the plans when Niall chirps up again “wait! There is a problem, sorry lads, but I don’t have a baseball bat.”

“Yeah, but you do play golf mate!” With that Louis hangs up and hits the acceleration in his car, almost forgetting to shift gears, _I’m fuming alright!_ His fingers are shaking from the adrenaline running through him.

to be continued...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> …continued in Brave Enough II
> 
> I’ll upload part II on Friday!
> 
> Some canon/explanatory notes…  
> 1\. Louis Football Team is playing the U20 Football Club Championships (fictional). The last 16 teams play in the round of sixteen, which consists of two rounds (on home turf and away turf). The 8 winning teams go into the Quarterfinals, which also consists of two rounds. The remaining 4 teams go into the knock-out round (only one game played between the chosen teams) called the semi-final. The last two go into the final.  
> 2\. Louis mother’s advice is taking from Louis’ song ‘Two of Us’.  
> 3\. On the [16th June](https://twitter.com/niallofficial/status/1140027643884113920?lang=en), Niall answered a fan question on Twitter and stated that his lucky number is 8. Hence is jersey number is 8.


	4. Brave Enough II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so excited to share part II...
> 
> (This goes without saying, but apparently I do need to: Please do not repost or copy my work without permission. This is a work of fiction and intended for fandom enjoyment.)
> 
> Please be advised there is violence in this.

previously ...

“Who was this.” 

“Don’t bother he won’t tell us.” 

Louis ignores Robin, “who was this?” Louis grabs his chin gently between his thumb and index finger. His nose also shows parts of dried blood and a tear spills past his left eye, slowly pooling towards Louis’ thumb. “Hazza I need you to tell me. Now! Curly this is serious, tell me who it was!” 

“Ashton. It was Ashton.” Harry admitted in a whisper so that no one heard but Louis.

“Right!” Louis turned around again, grabbing his phone he dialled his WhatsApp group. 

“Lou…please don’t.” He hears Harry ask quietly, but Louis’ already halfway to the door. In his car, the Bluetooth announces that the boys have all picked up.

“What’s up, Tommo?” Niall chirps too happy. 

“It’s baseball time!” Louis introduces, his voice shaking with anger.

“What’s that mean?”

“Means I’m fuming and I will beat the shite out of Ashton and his crew with me baseball bat.” His knuckles go white from the grip he has on the steering wheel.

“Wait, what he do?” Liam asks timidly, already squirmy.

“Beat the shit out of Hazza.” 

“Alright, alright. Let’s do it.” Niall agrees enthusiastically. Everyone affirms the plans when Niall chirps up again “wait! There is a problem, sorry lads, but I don’t have a baseball bat.”

“Yeah, but you do play golf mate!” With that Louis hangs up and hits the acceleration in his car, almost forgetting to shift gears, _I’m fuming alright!_ His fingers are shaking from the adrenaline running through him....

💚🍑💙enjoy part II...

Moments later he is parking in front of the public pool, he knows Ashton is at with his friends. He’s met by Niall with a golf club and Zayn with empty hands, but a rucksack filled with spray paint on his back. They looked like proper idiots, but _they’re my idiots, best friends in the world, no better people to count on._ He steps out of his car and waves with his baseball bat. “Where the fuck is Liam?”

“Right there…” Niall is pointing his finger towards a small pink Vespa approaching. Louis would have made fun of Liam riding shotgun on that thing, clothing his girlfriend like a koala, if it weren’t for the boiling rage in his veins. Liam jumps off of Danielle’s Vespa, stumbling a bit. He gives his girlfriend a kiss before approaching the lads, though Danielle stays put for a while to stare at them. 

“Lets go then!” 

“Wait Tommo,” Liam blocks his path with his body. “Have you thought about this?”

“He hurt Harry. Yes I want to fuck him up! Let’s move.”

“No Louis.” He takes a deep breath and continues “Last time you fucked over Ashton, you got away with it because your better footie player than him. Crusaders agreed to keep you off the hook, cause you’re superior player than him, superior human than him actually. But this time, you’re doing it for Harry. Are you ready to be labelled as a ‘fag’ like Harry? Go through the shit that he goes through every day?” 

Louis doesn’t even hesitate, “for Harry I would!” Liam slightly smiles at him knowingly, before letting his hand drop so that Louis could pass. Liam gives Danielle a hand sign so that she can leave. In a pink daze she drives off. “We all in agreement, we fuck shit up?”

“For Harry.” Niall pipes.

“Wait lads.” Zayn says with a low bored tone. “I’m not doing this.”

“What?” Louis’ heart drops. If anyone should have been at his side, it should be Zayn, his best friend. “Why?”

“Look I’ve known Harry forever. But in there,” he points towards the pool “those are my best buyers, alright? I’m not fucking that up to protect someone I haven’t properly talked to in like…ever!” 

“You talked to him last week for hours!” Niall’s exasperates, his face mirrors the same defiant shock and betrayal as Louis’.

“I’m not going. Good luck lads.” Zayn turns around and leaves. Louis stares at his back disappearing the same direction that Danielle had. _How had this not at least been a proper discussion? He just fucked off?_

“What now? Louis we need at least one more person.” 

“Yeah Yeah alright. Let me think.” He quickly picks up his phone and dials.

A honeyed voice answers muffled, like the cheek is leaning against a flat hand in boredom. “Good Evening, welcome to the babysitting detention centre hotline, how may I direct your call.”

“Your chipper.” Louis muses.

“Louis! Thank god, please tell me you have a way of making this day better.” The voice jumps into action, much clearer now.

“No time, Jade. I need someone who can beat people up, like right now.”

“Oh, well, you know Jesy right? She’s pretty handy with a cricket bat.”

“Jesy, really?”

“Well, when her ex-boyfriend broke her heart by cheating on her, she stole her brother’s club and beat the shit out of his balls. He went to the hospital and all.” Louis is a little shocked and ends up agreeing to it. Luckily Jesy is visiting family today which means she’s in town. She’s all too happy to jump in for Zayn. 

“I know who you have been hanging out with…” Ashton is pushing against Michael’s chest, making the smaller boy tumble back. 

“Why’d you do it Ashton?” Louis screams as they finally round the pool’s building. His people are flanking him, and they come to a stop a few feet away from Ashton’s crew. Luke bends down to help Michael up, who immediately hides in Luke’s shadow as far away from Louis and Ashton as he can.

“What you talking about Tommo?”

“Harry!”

Ashton’s face splits into a cat-like grin “who cares?”

“We happen to care!” Niall screams at his side, tapping the golf club against his foot.

“What you going to do with that huh?” Ashton laughs, “you sure you know how to handle that?”

“You suggesting we can’t?” Louis asks, throwing the baseball bat over his shoulder. Ashton laughs. They charge forward and everyone clashes into someone else. Louis rams the bat into Ashton’s stomach, it makes him fall forward, and Louis knees him in the face, by accident but who cares. Ashton rams his head into Louis’ side, causing him to fall forward. But he uses the bat to hit him on his back, while clutching to him like he’s his lover. Ashton tries to punch the bat away but the koala grip Louis has on him is strong. With most of his effort Louis turns him onto his back, Louis keeps his legs gripping onto him. During the motion, Ashton was able to slap away his bat, and it landed to his right.

In his peripheral vision Louis can see that Luke catches Niall’s club and throws it away. Niall uses the pull to land on top of Luke to punch him into his face. To his right Calum moans from getting kneed in the balls by Jesy. She’s scratching and kicking like a cat. Louis squares a few punches in Ashton’s surprised face.

To his left Liam is hovering over the cowering Michael, who pulls his hands up “I helped him…please…”

“What?” Liam halts, his punches would be the toughest with his boxing training, but he’s also incredibly soft at heart.

“I made them stop beating him,” Michael says tears of fear pooling in his eyes “I made them stop. I helped him home. I tried to help him, please don’t hurt me.” 

Liam retracts, “get the fuck out!” Michael gets to his feet looking around, Liam gives him a look. 

“Luke, he’s…”

“Don’t fucking test me!” Liam sneers and starts looking around who will need help and runs to Jesy’s side. Luke and Niall are currently rolling around in the grass pulling at each other’s hair like young schoolgirls.

Louis looks down at Ashton’s popped left eyebrow “Why’d you do it?” His fist is still hovering over his face.

Ashton laughs, rude and dangerous “why I do anything else mate.” Louis raises his intact eyebrow. “Kicks and giggles mate. Kicks and fucking giggles!” Louis skin burns, anger running down his arm like sweat running down his back. He lifts his arm and punches him right back on the nose. The crack and his howl indicate another break.

“What the fuck happened to you?” Jay whisper screams, attentive not to swear in front of the twins, who are laughing in front of the TV.

“Louis defended Harry’s honour and Harry got beaten up for it, so we kicked the shit out of them.” Jesy unhelpfully supplied. 

“Who are you? I don’t think I know you!” Jay says staring at her with popping eyes of disbelief.

“I’m Jesy, nice to meet you. Killer dress.” She compliments Jay, who is shockingly endeared. “Louis said that you was a nurse, so we hope that you could patch us up!” 

Jay raised her eyebrow at Louis, cocking her head to the side. “Dan get the first aid kit.” Dan stares at her and then gets going. 

After everyone has been patched up, with weird looks from both Dan and Jay as they explained at least a fraction of what had happened, they all move to Louis’ room. They’re watching a film on Louis’ small laptop that no one is really listening to, because they’re still hyped talking about what they just did. Jesy is snuggled up to Louis on his bed, “did you really beat the shit out of your boyfriend?”

“Yeah, he fucked someone else, who happened to be a teacher by the way.”

“Shit. Jade said you got arrested or something.”

“Yeah he went to the cops,” Jade says, twirling Louis’ hair in her finger. “His new girlfriend went to my university I was supposed to go to, you know Cambridge, and they redacted my acceptance letter.” 

“I’m sorry.”

“That’s okay, after I won in court I applied to Manchester Uni. I’m studying law now, didn’t think I would to be honest. Everything has a good side, mate. You wouldn’t have had me almost kill Calum today if I had gone to Cambridge.”

Louis coughs from his strong drink, but gives her a teary smile, and she leans forward to give him a soft kiss on the forehead. _God, that makes me feel small._ Her phone starts beeping. “Hello…no he’s not here…Perrie he left them…something about not talking to Harry…love I got no idea where he is…how long has it been? … alright I’ll ask Louis but don’t get your hopes up.” Louis is listening into the conversation quietly while twirling the glass filled with Dan’s contribution of pride toward his step-son’s achievement: his best whiskey. “Louis have you heard from Zayn?”

“Don’t wanna talk to him if I wanna be honest.”

“Yeah I get it, it’s just he’s been real flaky with Perrie. He stopped responding to her calls, he’s been aloof as fuck.” 

“Don’t know, he’s been a bit weird to be honest.”

“Yeah that’s what I thought.” Jade nods and gives this information to Perrie and quickly hangs up, huffing out some breaths of annoyance.

“Been odd that one.” Liam interjects, “I know Zayn a while, but he’s been really off. I think he’s doing too many drugs.” 

“He’s high in school too.” Niall supplies from his spot from the bean bag. They get interrupted by the next phone call. “Hello.” Niall chirps into his phone the second time tonight. _How can someone always be this happy?_ Louis can hear Gemma on the other side of the line, Niall is one of those people who have their phone on way too loud. 

“Tell me you didn’t!” 

“What you talking about, beautiful?” Niall asks enthusiastically and a little flirty.

“Niall Horan tell me what you did tonight, and I might give you a snog or a killing.” Her voice was excited and high-pitched.

“Oh you mean that! Yeah, lovey, I beat the shit out of Ash.”

“Who was there?”

“Ehh…Jesy, Louis, Liam and ME.”

“Well done.” Another voice pipes up quieter _“Louv shere?”_

“Yes, that what he said, innit?” She is talking to Niall again “Who instigated this? Was it Louis.”

“Aye, was all Louis’ idea. He was red with fury I tell ye.”

“Well done him.” _“Ish wash Louv?”_ “Yes love, Louis saved the day.”

“Louis,” Niall chuckles, “Gemma thinks you saved the day.”

“Send my love.” Louis replies, he can feel his ears burning red. There is a tremble in his gut, _Harry knows._

“How are you, mate?”

“Hursh.”

“What’s up with the lisp?”

“Jaw crack.” Gemma supplies in the off.

“Fuck that sucks, I’m sorry man.”

“Ho’s shou?”

“We’re fine…much better than you so don’t worry, yeah mate?”

“Ish-kay”

“Love you mate! All of us.”

“ ‘ove shou Ni.”

“Good night princess.” Louis calls loudly. Niall laughs, infecting the others to do the same. 

“You look so stunning Mrs T.” Jesy compliments Louis’ mother again, and she blushes and brushes her hair with a delicate hand behind her ear. 

“Wait. She dress up?” Louis whispers to Dan.

“Not for me.” Dan says bitter. Louis looks between Jesy and Jay back and forth. _Fuking God, what does this mean?_

_“_ I made breakfast for all of ye.” Jay placed plates in front of everyone, but Liam is clearly squirming.

“What’s up with you?” Louis asks shuffling scrambled eggs into his mouth. 

“Don’t worry love, your mother already called. Told her you’re here.” Liam smiles, thankful and his face colour returns. _Wanker. My favourite wanker as it turns out._

“I’m proud of you.” Dan pats him on his shoulder and whispers to him. “I know I shouldn’t say so when you used violence against someone, but I’m proud.”

“Thanks Dan.”He says, while the eggs go flying out of his mouth over the entire table.

“Ew Tommo.”

“Yeah yeah alright,” he stands up and knocks his orange juice with his nail. “Mhm.” He clears his throat for dramatics. “In case I have forgotten to make a speech last night…”

“You did.” Niall chirps. Louis gives him a side-eyed glare.

“… I wanted to say thank you, for being amazing people. Thank you for showing up lads and lassies.” Jesy giggles, putting her hand over her heart. “Thank you for being the bestest people ever. Cheers I love you all.” 

“Whoop, Whoop.” “Hear, hear.” “Right on.” They cheer and celebrate. Suddenly they start to dance in the kitchen, giggling to each other like the maniacs that they are.

“Alright. I will need my whiskey back.” Dan mutters to Jay at the table, who turns her wide eyes at him that say something along the lines of you-gave-him-whiskey?. “Of course I didn’t.” Dan chuckles nervously.

The bell above the door jingles quietly when Louis pushes it over. The room is bathed in a beige warm light and the vitrines are glistening from the sun that’s shining in. “Can I help you darling?” An elderly woman asks, she’s wearing a red apron with a name tag calling her Barbara. 

Louis was distracted by the beautiful display of fruit and sponge cakes. “Hello love.”

“What can I get you?” She asks, watching him through small round glasses.

“Oh,” Louis looks up from the vitrine “actually I’m looking for Harry.”

Her round head shakes, “I’m sorry, but he called in sick today. Could barely speak that poor boy.”

“Right.” Louis brushes through his hair, _damn now the thirty minutes in front of the mirror were a waste of time. “_ Can you give me some of what he likes then, maybe that’ll get him back on his feet.” He’s not quite sure if the women here are aware of the full situation.

“You getting something for Harry?”

“Yeah, he is Karen. Let’s get him a big box.” A pudgy woman with white short hair grabs her glasses that were dangling from a necklace on her chest and puts them on. She goes through some box options until she picks the biggest out.

“A big box for Harry.” Both women lean over their display to pick out Harry’s favourites while the other customer taps his foot on the floor. 

“He’s really popular here I see.” Louis grins. _Of course Harry brings out his charms for elderly ladies._

“Such a charming lad.” Karen says. “I’ve tried setting him up, but then you know he came out, no future there I am afraid.”

“We don’t know that many gays to set him up with.” Barbara says sadly and suddenly both women are eyeing Louis top to bottom. 

Louis eyes widen and deflects, “must be hard for him.” 

“Excuse me. I’m a customer too.” Someone barks at the elderly lady, the taping foot man who had been left at the till by Karen.

“Calm it mate,” Louis calls to him. “Don’t be that hasty with the girls.” He grabs for his wallet. 

“Girls, he called us girls, you hear that?” Amused Barbara giggles.

“Oh none-sense,” Karen waves her hand. “It’s free if it’s for Harry.”

“You sure? I have like ten quid here.” But the ladies wave it off again. 

“Give him our love.” She grins winking. 

“Yeah from his girls in the bakery.” They all join a fit of giggles when Louis winks at them.

Louis walks up to the house and rings the bell. It’s odd ringing the bell after living there for two months, walking in and out as he pleased. Sometimes inviting friends over. There’s muffled talking until the door opens and Louis is greeted by a sight of a man that he has seen in Harry’s Land Rover before the day they fought over Michael. A stout man with a square jaw and tiny eyes. His teeth are slightly crooked, and his hair has turned white. “Hi, I’m here for Haz.” The man lifts a porous eyebrow. Louis starts shifting from one side to the other “I mean Harry, I’m here to see Harry.” He swallows harshly, “want to give him these.” He lifts the big box in his arms “from the girls in the bakery.”

“Girls? Aren’t they all over fifty?” 

“Technically yes.”

“Technically?” 

“Mhm. There is always an option to get a small smile on someone’s face.” Louis’ grins and Mr Styles laughs. And when he smiles, his stern face becomes tender and kind like Harry’s. 

“You were here, stormed in and out.” He says while Louis tries to look past him inside. “That have nothing to do with John calling me about Ashton’s second broken nose.” 

Louis barks a laugh, “his nose is broken again?” Harry’s father lifts his eyebrow again. “I have no idea what you are implying, but I am almost positive I have absolutely nothing to do with that.” Louis is shaking his head dramatically, smiling at the end. Harry’s father looks down at his box, but Louis realises he’s staring at the broken skin on Louis' knuckles of his right hand. 

“Will you let me deliver this to him?” He asks with a pout, hoping the man isn’t immune, which lets be honest is very likely with a son like Harry. 

“Those,” he’s pointing at Louis pout, “usually only work on your own parents kid. Besides my Harry is better than you.” He steps aside and Louis bounds in, kicking his shoes off quickly with little care for where they land. 

“I know the way.” Louis beams.

“Hold on.” A hand on his shoulder stops him “I feel better if I show you.” Louis’ gut does a double take, and he sincerely hopes that Harry’s father doesn’t hate him. They walk up to the second floor and head for Harry’s room. There are voices coming out of it and _shit, what if he’s not alone?_ This could become awkward. “My mother is with him.” 

They open the door, and Louis is looking at an elderly woman sipping on a cocktail sitting on a small chair next to Harry’s bed. Harry is listening to her intently, trying not to smile too hard, because it hurts. He’s not wearing a shirt, and the skin surrounding his eye is still green. His lips are partly blue from the assault and there are red spots all over his jaw. “There is someone here for you, kid.” Louis has never been in Harry’s room, when he lived here he was to on-edge to go inside, afraid his feelings would swallow him. There is a built-in-closet all along the left wall, notes and tiny little newspaper articles are stuck on the wall above a white littered table, scrap booking utensils litter the surrounding floor. The white bed with white/purple bedsheets stands under a roof pitch with pink painting. _It’s so Harry_.

Harry looks up and his eyes lighten up to a happy lime green. “Lou.” Harry’s father stills next to him and stares between the two.

“Hi,” Louis says soft. “Brought you some pastries from the girls from the shop. And when they ask please do tell them I said _girls_ , cause they really wanted that.” Harry is snickering. 

“You’re a pretty man.” Harry’s grandmother slurs. “Why don’t you ever bring home boys like him?” 

Harry goes red from the trip of his hair all the way to his collarbone, but his father grunts. “If he’s more interested in other things than bringing boys around, then I’m over the moon about that. Don’t put ideas into his mind that I have to deal with.” 

“You’re a bore Desmond.” She accuses taking another sip through her straw, staring at her son over the rim.

“Let’s give them some room mother.” He says and forcefully lifts her out of her seat, though she obviously wanted to have a front row seat. “Door stays open!” He calls over his shoulder with a pointed look at his son. Harry nods furiously making his curls bounce.

They move down the stairs, and Louis can hear her complain “I hate greek Drama, everything happens off-stage.” Louis holds a laugh behind his hand.

“You look better.” He tells Harry while he places the box down on the foot of the bed. Harry tucks the blanket around himself and crawls closer. _Please don’t be naked. Be naked, please don’t be naked._ “Not so purple no more.”

“Thank you.” He lifts the lid and his eyes go soft. “Not sure I can eat these.”

“Hey.” Louis calls excited, “your lisp is gone.” 

“Oh yeah.” He smiles, “they took the wirings out yesterday, have to rest it a bit, but now the jaw is fine. I mean it hurts like hell, but I can talk again. I just hope I can sing soon, don’t want to miss our competition.” 

“I’m sure you’ll be much better then.” Harry grins in appreciation of Louis’ words and grabs a Queen Victoria Sponge. 

“You want to sit?” Harry asks, patting the spot next to him. 

“Sure.” Louis sits down and watches Harry pick the cake apart to fit it in-between his pouty lips. “So your dad is here.”

“Yeah, mum’s out with Gemma and dad was here anyway. He’s worried.” Harry slurs his words like usual and it takes him a heck of a long time to finish his sentence, but it’s his usual Harry. He leans over to give Harry’s knee a squeeze.

“How are you really?”

“I’m okay.” Harry doesn’t meet his eyes and Louis tries to catch them. They both laugh when Louis flips himself onto his stomach like a seal to get Harry’s eyes. The green meet the blue “I’m fine. Truly. Thank you, Lou. Niall told me what you did.”

“I think we’re finally there yeah? Finally, got them off ye back?” Louis falls onto his back on Harry’s ankles.

“I hope so.” Harry pushes more food into his mouth.

“Good, fuckers better keep their things off me boy.” Harry blushes again and tries to hide his chest from his view. That makes Louis look harder. “You should definitely cover that banner up. Not very well executed is it?” Harry shrugs.

“I have this idea.” He whispers, looking at the open door. “You wanna see?”

“Yeah.” Louis sits back up. Harry grabs his phone from the bedside table and goes through his photo gallery. 

“I found this guy Liam Sparks he makes these couples love tattoos and I found this.” He shows Louis a picture of a t-shirt, in which two birds are situated on each peck slanted towards the middle rip bone. There are two words ‘Love’ and ‘True’ below each bird. There is also a huge anatomical heart in the middle. “I just want birds. Not the rest.”

“I like it.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, how are you going to personalise it?”

“Don’t know yet. I mean different birds probably. And maybe…it’s silly.”

“No go on.” Louis is generally curious.

“Eyebrows. I was going to give them eyebrows.” Louis smiles.

“Birds don’t have eyebrows do they?”

“Hey, eyebrows and personality are two separate things. Aren’t they? Now your personality might be shit as long as your eyebrows are on fleek you always get a good compliment.” Louis laughs.

“Alright don’t get worked up.” They start researching birds and their meanings over the next hour. Louis wants Harry to get swallows, arguing that “swallows are the first sign of land when you come home from sea.” But Harry is leaning towards a sparrow.

“Louis, you can’t smoke in here!” Louis smirks at him.

“I wasn’t sweetness.” Harry slips out of his bed, only clad in his boxers and grabs Louis’ hand to follow him. They tiptoe to the bathroom, and Harry opens his window. He makes a motion for Louis to sit a top of the counter to smoke out of it. 

“How’s that?” He points towards Louis’ lip.

“Fine. Little musky.” 

“Not the cigarette.” Harry snorts, wrapping his arms around his stomach. His legs, Louis notices, are covered in purple marks and his foot has several scratches. “Your lip.”

Instinctively Louis touches his lip, during the fight it had popped and there was an ugly dried scar parting it. “Battle scars feel good.” Harry nods with a glimmer in his eyes. Louis grabs his shirt and lifts it. He turns his back to Harry, so he can see the bruises where Ashton had kicked him during their tumble. “Them hurt a little more, couldn’t sleep with me back last night and I love sleeping on me back.” 

“I’m sorry.” Harry tightens his hold around himself.

Louis painfully puffs on his cigarette, the smoke burning his fresh wound. “Sleep on me tummy now.” He grins at the boy who is eye-level with him.

“I’m going to take a shower.” Harry says and jumps in, his boxers land on the floor. Louis tries not to think about Harry’s white porcelain skin bathed in warm water. Water droplets dripping past his bruises and down his thin but strong calves. Louis inhales deeply when he feels himself twitch. Harry softly sings a few tunes, but leaves out the words that require him to open his mouth too far. _That right he’s not even able to open his mouth!_ He shakes his head to get the thoughts out of his head. “Can you get me my towel?”

“The pink one?” Louis laughs when he squishes out the cigarette throwing it out the window.

“Baby blue actually.” Harry opens the curtains to stick his head out, his curls a mop on his head. Louis turns around for Harry to get out, and he skips to his room to get dressed, or semi dressed since Harry loved being naked. Louis gets an idea. 

He comes back to the room with Harry in trackie pants, sitting at the edge of the bed texting on his phone. “You’ll get a cold.” Louis says and plugs in the hair blower. With a mischievous grin he stands behind Harry to start. Finally, he gets his hand in between these beautiful curls again. They are silky from the water and as long as Louis uses the hot air against it, the curlier it gets. He scratches Harry’s scalp and the boy almost purrs from it. 

Harry grabs his hand after the hair has dried completely “Louis, can we stop now. It’s getting very hot.” 

“Nope. What we are doing here is adding some volume to your curls.”

“You’re burning my head.” Harry starts to fidget.

“So what we are attempting is to burn your scalp as well.” Louis chuckles, fluffing Harry’s hair with his hand. 

“Oww! My ears are on fire Lou!” Harry squeezes his eyes shut.

“Just let me give you some volume.”

“Stop you idiot.” Louis grins when Harry turns around and immediately closes his eyes again to the wind blowing into his face. 

“You look like a kitten.” 

“Stop it already!” He grabs his hands and uses his larger hands to turn it on Louis. Louis goes pliant, because _my hands are so small compared to his, they completely cover mine._ He abruptly stops the machine of destruction to stop his heart from beating too loud.

“Hello?” Louis looks up to see Anne smiling at them with a smirking expression. Louis and Harry are back in bed, munching on some cakes while there is _Friends_ playing on Harry’s laptop in front of them. Harry’s head has inched to Louis’ tummy, he desperately tried to ignore how pudgy it was, like a pillow. Self-conscious since Eleanor doesn’t hold back creating new diets for him and telling him how unattractive she finds his fat.

Louis stopped carding his fingers through Harry’s curls “Hi Anne.”

“You look cosy.” Harry makes an attempt to sit up “Don’t love. Dinner is in an hour.” They both nod before refocusing on the _Friends_ episode.

“Lou?” He grunts affirmatively. Harry is playing with the loose string of Louis jeans on his knees. “Can we watch some football.”

“There a game on?”

“Packers are playing the Rams in a few.”

“Shit. American Football?” A shiver runs down his spine. There is no sport more boring that the constant stopping and waiting of American Football, well maybe horse shows are and golf. _Who the fuck plays golf?_ “Fine.” He says, because he decided a while a go it is Harry’s day and so everything he wants goes.

Louis stirs the first time out of his sleep, he’s lying on his side and Harry is sitting up next to him. His green eyes shimmer bright from the screen of the Laptop. “Does that game never end?” Harry startles, causing the laptop to slip off of his lap and towards Louis. “Sorry.” He looks down at the screen and groans. “Wait?” He sees a glint of something and sits up to stare at Harry in shock. “This isn’t live?” 

“No why?”

“Fuck Harry.” Louis groans rubbing his eyes, “we have been rewatching a game from three seasons ago, what the fuck is the point in that?” 

Harry pouts, “it was a good game, besides you were asleep.”

“Because it was _that_ boring, mate!” Louis stares at Harry, “no. No Harry, your pout doesn’t work on me!” Harry opens his eyes wider and pulls his lower lip out further. “You’re insufferable.” Harry giggles as he snuggles down into Louis embrace, curls tickling his chin. _So insufferable._ He smells like strawberries. He closes his eyes again.

“We already had dinner, I saved you soup.” Louis shifts to look at the bedside table.

“Shit, me sleep cycle will be fucked up after this.” 

“Sorry, you looked so peaceful and you had so much going on the last 48 hours so…”

“It’s fine Harold. But I do want some soup, so up.” But Harry only lets him shift so much, so that they are still snuggling when Louis puts the soup in his lap. A nose brushing against his hip and Louis’ arm around a strong back, fingertips ghosting over an exposed hip. Inching towards his side bum. _He feels so good, so right. That scare me._

The second time he wakes up, there is a warm hum in his gut and his cheeks. Harry’s body is neatly tucked into his arms and feet tangling between each other. Louis nuzzles Harry’s shoulder, and he feels calm. There is no itching, no sizzling in his skin. There is only calm and warmth. He breathes in Harry’s scent and enjoys the tickle of his hair against his eyelids. He listens to Harry mumbling in his sleep and lets it lull him. “Shit!” He surges upwards. “It’s fucking Monday. It’s what… what time is it?” Harry moans while he wakes up popping his long limbs like a cat. Louis scurries to the edge of the bed to get to his pants _fuck I slept here._ “Ouch…” Louis looks up from where he is lying on the floor. 

“What’s wrong with you?” Harry smiles down at him, voice hoarse from talking all night.

“It’s Monday and it’s” he looks at his acquired phone. “ten! Fuck its ten o’clock! School, mums going to kill me.” 

“Louis.” Harry whines, falling onto his stomach to look at him from his duvet, blinking tiredly. “It’s May Day Bank Holiday.” 

Louis groans letting himself fall against the floor dramatically, “couldn’t have said that earlier? Nearly had a heart attack.”

“Your communication was shit, Lou.” His voice is so low, it’s the most beautiful sound. “Can we go back to sleep now?”

“I just fell on my big fat bum, me bum hurts and not in a good way.” Harry chuckles deep. “I’m awake now aren’t I?” He gets back up and brushes a curl out of Harry’s eyes, what else was he supposed to do, just leave it hanging there? “I’ll make breakfast, stay here.” 

“Uh breakfast in bed, sounds perfect.” Harry’s eyes are already falling shut again. Louis walks downstairs to the kitchen, he feels right at home and the house is quiet. Not as loud as when his entire litter of a family stayed here. The problem with his plan is that Louis can’t cook. And that includes breakfast. Bacon goes black with no reason, eggs basically explode in the pan and pancakes never make it without burning. _But everyone loves a fighter, right? Alright what do I mix together again?_

“What smells burnt?” Gemma stares at the smokey kitchen.

“Pancakes!” Louis screams making a star jump with the spatula in his hand. 

“More like cancer in a pan.” Gemma opens the back door to let some fresh air circulate the smoke out of the room. She fastens the pink sleeping gown around herself. “These for Harry then? ‘Cause I dare to say mum and Robin ain’t eating this. Nor am I.”

“These are masterpieces of greatness, you ain’t getting any.” He hits her hand with the spatula and turns the stove off. “You got a tray?” Gemma helps Louis put everything on the tray and Louis walks up the stairs back to Harry’s room. “Foods here.” He calls. 

“Mhm great.” Harry sits up and rubs his fists over his eyes pouting like a baby. _Adorable._ _Shut it brain!_ He places the tray over Harry’s lap. He stares at the burned items surrounded by syrup. “This looks…” He blinks at Louis hopeful expression up, “yummy.” Louis watches while Harry pops the first bite into his mouth. “Yummy…this is yummy.” Harry tires to be as convincing as possible not wanting to hurt Louis’ demeanour. Louis sits down and watches as Harry devours the pancakes, unknowingly he tries to get past this experience of his tongue as fast as possible. Louis grabs a small piece and pops it into his mouth, his face scrunches up and he runs to the bin to spit it out. 

“This is awful.” 

“It’s fine.” Harry tries.

“God. Harry stop.” Louis pounces for the tray, trying to get the pancakes away from Harry. “Please stop eating. I don’t want to be the reason why you die.” Harry barks a laugh and Louis covers his eyes with his hands “why’d you eat it? It’s disgusting.” 

“You looked so hopeful.” 

“I’m a shit cook, I already know that. No feelings hurt here.” Louis grins, flapping his hands. 

“Okay.” Harry gulps down the water. “It was shit.”

“Thank you for being honest.”

“Welcome.” They are sitting incredibly close, they’re crossed legs touching at the knees. Hands itching to be closer, lips tingling of anticipation. Harry’s fingers are ghosting between his, intertwining them. “Can I kiss you, Lou?” _So polite._

“So cocky all of the sudden.” He thinks for a while, seeing his cute small rabbit teeth puncturing his cherub lips. Louis lets go of his hand and takes the tray off of Harry’s lap carefully placing it on the floor. He’s aware that his bum is stretching over the material of his pants while he bends over in front of Harry. He stretches back up to see Harry’s eyes glued to it. He shuffles forward to the wide-eyed boy and sits down in his lap. Taking Harry’s hands, he places them on his bum, Louis’ arm circle his neck, and he bends down to lick his nose. “No. You can’t kiss me. But I will kiss you, Harry.” Louis fingers scrap through his curls while he bends down and places a feathery touch on his lip. It stops as soon as it started. He tugs on Harry’s curls and memorialises the moan it enlists for later. Harry’s lips are back on his, their lips shifting together perfectly. _I obviously have a weakness for Harry and his stupid curls. His lips and his lanky legs. But do I want this? If I leave, I’ll just hurt him._ Along his right butt cheek he can feel Harry’s long cock shifting tighter against him. Their lips slot apart tenderly. He won’t force Harry’s lips apart to taste him, he’s jaw is still hurt after all and Louis doesn’t know how far he can open his jaw. _What if someone sees me? Right here on his lap like a girl._ Harry squeezes his bum a little and Louis yelps out of his thoughts.

“Sorry. Just really wanted to do that for a while.” Louis raises his eyebrows amused.

“Can’t blame ye.” Louis chuckles brushing his thumb over his bottom lip, forcing it to part. He wiggles his bum and laughs hearing Harry moan. 

“Hihi” Harry blushes staring up at him. Louis starts caressing his red bruises on his jaw. “It’s not broken.” Harry clarifies. 

“That’s good.” Louis’ phone starts going of, reminding Louis of a world outside this bedroom. “That’s probably me mum.” He gets up carefully and tries to ignore how Harry’s cock lifts with Louis bum, jumping to his stomach inside his slacks. He skips over to his things to look at the screen. There is a few texts from his family, but it’s Eleanor who is calling him. He declines the call.

“Not who you were expecting?” Harry asks cheerfully, while he readjusts himself in his pants and pulls the blanket back around his hips.

“No,” Louis looks at him for a while. Watching his blushing cheeks and the way his green eyes drop from cheery light green to a darker forest green. 

“Who was it?” He finally asks, dreading the answer.

“El.” It’s barely a sound.

“Oh.” Harry closes in on himself again. 

“Right where were we?”

“You don’t want to answer it?” _No._ Harry looks at him, shoulder hunched towards his chest. _No, I don’t want to have this conversation with you. There is no conversation to have._

“No.” Louis says, climbing back on the bed across from Harry. He tries to grab his hand, but he pulls away.

“I…” Harry drools on slowly, “are you staying with her?”

Louis jerks his head in confusion “yes. Of course.”

“What about this?” 

“What about it?”

“This means nothing?”

“Come on Harry, don’t do this. We had an amazing day yesterday…”

“…yeah and today we kissed.” Harry sternly argues, clearly getting more confident. “In fact we have kissed three times, four even. I want this. Do you?” 

“I’m not breaking your heart right now.” Louis pulls his fingers through his fringe.

“That’s a No!” Harry shifts away from Louis. But Louis won’t have it, he grabs Harry’s hips and pulls him into his lap. The blanket is in the way and the boy uncomfortably falls into his lap, all tangled up. Louis softly holds him by his hips.

Blatantly staring at the green, he clarifies “I thought you don’t like labels.” He forces a kiss on Harry before he can argue. “Eleanor is a label, don’t put one on yourself.”

“I’m not a booty call you can conjure up whenever you want.”

Louis laughs, _booty call really Harold?_ Harry looks hurt by the laugh. He grabs Harry’s jaw tightly, making the boy wince, but Louis is a selfish person a lot of the time, and he needs Harry to hear him, really hear him this time. “I like kissing you, Harold, but Eleanor is me bird. That’s how it is.” He kisses him harshly, biting his bruised bottom lip. Harry moans in pain and pleasure. _Pain kink, huh?_ “Sounds like you’re alright with that too.” He gets up, unceremoniously leaving Harry where he’s tangled in the sheets. _I’m not letting you control what I am._ He knows it’s a lie, but he can’t admit to his feelings right now, not when everything is so complicated. “Got to get home, mum will be livid. Holiday and all.” He points between them “don’t tell no one about this please.” 

“I mean…” Harry wants to argue he’d tell Niall but decides to forgo that little information in favour giving him a sad nod. Give Louis what he wants to hear.

“I got to run. Yesterday was fun yeah?” Harry nods, more confused than before. But then Louis turns around, bends over the bed and gives his lips a tiny peck. This time soft and rushed. Harry grins the rest of the day, touching his lips with his fingers delicately from time to time.

💚🍑💙

Tuesday, school starts again, the one-day holiday making no difference for Louis’ nerves. His knuckles are still ripped and his hands are covered in gauze. His bottom lip still has a cut and his eyebrow is dried from it's pop, but doesn’t look too brutal any more. Thankfully no one at school will see his blue back. “Thanks for sending Jesy, she was amazing.” He tells Jade as they walk into Management class.

“Oh I know. She really likes you now.” Jade bites her lip and looks towards the table Louis usually sits. “You talked to him yet?”

“Nope.” Louis doesn’t look where her eyes are fixed to. “Mind if I sit with you today?” She shrugs in agreement, and they tell Jade’s friend to switch with Louis, she doesn’t seem to mind. Probably sporting a crush on Zayn anyway. “Jesy kept flirting with me mum.” Louis continues the conversation like they weren’t just interrupted.

“Louis what the hell?” Zayn says from behind Louis. “You serious?” 

Louis abruptly turns to face Zayn “You know what? Fuck you, Zayn.” 

“Alright class, let us talk balance sheets.” Mr. Cowell says as he enters the classroom, shutting the door loudly behind himself.

“Your mad because I didn’t want to fight a fight we wouldn’t have won?” Zayn snorts. 

“Die down the chatter guys!” The teacher bellows in the front.

“We won ye prick.” Louis retorts, ignoring the hell in the front. Zayn looks at his bottom lip unbelieving. “You’re a coward Zayn and you can’t keep blaming your anxiety for everything. You let the only people down that have stuck on your side!” 

“I have plenty of people, was doing just fine before you arrived.” 

“What’s that mean?” Louis wanders.

“You don’t find it odd that you would jump out of a window for Styles?” Zayn mocks into his ear. “You fuck everything up mate. Harry don’t need you nor do my friends.”

“Not your friends anymore!” Louis barks, shushing the entire class up.

“Am I witnessing a lovers quarrel?” Cow-hell snickers as he approaches them. “What’s wrong Tomlinson? Mr Malik here not kiss your ass to your satisfaction?”

“I’m sorry Sir, I wasn’t aware you were allowed to talk to students that way.” 

“Do I have to send you to the headmaster?”

“What for?” Louis is fuming, but there is no electricity in his veins, just anger in his gut. It’s not that primal cutting in his veins any more, maybe beating the shit out of Ashton had a good effect on his own terrible body trying to get him in trouble all the time.

“You talking out of turn, son.” 

“Don’t call me son!” Louis hoarsely growls.

“The following pupils please report to the Headmasters office: Mr Horan, Mr Hemmings, Mr Payne, Mr Tomlinson, Mr Calum and Mr Irwin, thank you.” The secretary’s voice sings into the microphone.

Zayn looks at Louis with big eyes. “Well, Mr. Tomlinson looks like your heading in that direction anyway.” Louis and Liam gather their things, dumping their books in their locker and head for the Headmaster’s office. In the hallway outside they were greeted by the rest of them. 

“Do you think this is about...” Niall starts once they approach.

“…your fag? Yes!” Ashton calls.

“No one say anything. There’s no witnesses and no one has to know.” Calum says and for the first time both parties agree. 

“Look we just stick together,” Luke’s face is desperate. “We have to back each other up! I really don’t feel great.”

“For fucks sake, eat something you idiot.” Calum gives Luke a Mars Bar. It’s a tender move between two friends, and the first time Louis wanders if the rest of that group are actually nice to each other. Their friends after all. 

“Thanks,” Luke mumbles while he pushes the bar far into his mouth, moaning.

“You’re such a porn star, Luk-y.” Calum grins soft, while watching Luke devour the Mars Bar. It reminds Louis of Harry devouring his burned pancakes yesterday morning. Their conversation pops back into his mind, and he turns to Liam to talk to him about it when Liam stares at him with an open confused face.

“Mind your language boy. Inside all of you!” They all awkwardly shuffle inside, where they split in two groups lining up across from each other on opposite walls. Louis’ heart sinks when he sees that Harry is already sitting lonely in the small chair in front of Headmaster Paul Higgins’ desk. Head hanging and shoulders sagging towards his chest, Niall gives his shoulder a small squeeze before lining up next to Liam.

“You’re all here because there has been an incident.” The headmaster points towards Harry. “Mr Styles was attacked on Friday night, and I have asked all my teachers to look out for any signs that a student has been in a fight and all of you are the lucky few.“

“Lucky?” 

“Well as I take it and see right in front of me right now is that you all happen to be friends. So you see it makes sense that you were all at each other’s throats.” 

“Nope.” Liam overcompensates fast, proving that he is a terrible liar. 

“Well, Mr Payne would you like to explain to me how you got that limp that you are caring?”

“Niall, Liam and I are all in the same footie team and had a rough scrimmage in the park. I had no idea that Harry was attacked at the same time.” Louis quickly talks over Liam’s retort, knowing that Liam won’t be able to come up with an adequate lie. Liam thankfully exhales next to him. He can feel green eyes on him, but he gives the headmaster all his attention. Knowing liars are usually afraid to look someone in the eyes.

“A scrimmage where Mr Horan has scratches on his neck?” Higgins points toward him.

“That was my girlfriend. She’s a wee minx, Sir.” The headmaster’s lips quirk for a millisecond, showing amusement for the first time. 

“What about you Mr Hood? Mr Roberts, your P.E. teacher, tells me your back is an open wound and your hand has an actual whole in it.”

“Fell down some stairs, Sir.” Calum’s low voice booms through the room, leaving no room for negotiations. 

“Stairs?”

“Yeah in my father’s abbey. I am an idiot, Sir.” 

Headmaster Higgins makes a suppressed sound, “Mr Hemmings, how did you end up with that head injury? ”

“Me dog was attacked by other dogs in the park and then there were these poisoned baits, very terrible situation Sir. Had to go to the vet late Friday Sir.” The headmaster huffed and turned to Ashton.

“Mr Irwin?” Higgins asks his interest dying down.

“My father hit me.” There is silence in the room while the headmaster stares at Ashton and his broken nose with an open mouth. Louis knew it wasn’t true, and he felt terrible for the man that he had met on the bleachers. 

“You’re all sticking to this story?“ He asks everyone.

“Not a story, it’s the truth Sir.” Louis states.

“Mr Styles you sure you don’t remember who it was?” He refocuses on the boy before him.

“No Sir, got me from behind.” Louis can see that Ashton is biting his tongue to avoid saying the pun out loud.

“I will be sending letters to all of your parents and then will see what happens with this situation... all of you get out.” They start shuffling. “Irwin. Stay.” 

“Wow.” Niall lets out a nervous laugh.

“Stick to your stories when your parents ask!” Liam says when they all gather in the hallway.

Calum cleared his throat awkwardly “we want a ceasefire.” Louis turned around to him.

“Then stop bullying Harry.” 

“I can't promise that the name-calling will end, but we won’t hurt you no more.”

“No fights. No iced coffees thrown at faces… no physical violence or I will break Ashton’s nose for a third time!” 

“Like you could.” Calum snorts.

“I’ve proven it twice mate. Even his father gave me permission to do so.” Calum’s eyebrows shoot up. Should not have said that his gut warns him. 

Calum spits into his hand and pushes it forward, Louis does the same. “Deal.” Their skin makes a disgusting squelch noise when they slap together. The door opens, and Ashton looks at their hands. He and Calum share a look, but he seems to give his agreement. “What he want then?” 

“Warned me if I make accusations like that dad might get into trouble with the coppers. Told him I don’t care. Headmaster going to contact the police if I stick to my story.” He shrugs his shoulder. 

“Tommo says your dad wanted him to hit you.” Ashton’s face falls for a moment. 

“Fucker.”

“He’s a good guy Ashton.” Louis tries “he just worried.”

“No offence Tomlinson, but shut the fuck up. You don’t know the first thing about my father. Let's go.” Luke waves when he trots behind Calum and Ashton. 

Calum turns around one more time, “can I have the number of the chick that beat me up?”

“Do we look dumb to you?” Liam contorts.

“Nah, just want to ask her out on a date. There’s not many women that can beat a guy like me up, mate.” 

“We’ll ask her first.” Louis says. 

Calum gives him a thumbs up before heading out with the other two. Louis grunts out a laugh and Liam joins him.

“Michael isn’t here.” Harry says.

“He, uh, didn’t have any injuries. He said he helped you, I let him go.”

“Oh.” Harry chews on his lips.

“Do you remember him doing that?”

“I was unconscious pretty fast, but I suppose there was some screaming in the back. I dunno.”

“One way or another, he pissed himself of fear, so don’t worry about him no more.”

Harry gives Louis a meaningful look and to himself he says “wasn’t.”

“It’s such a shame that they lost!” Eleanor muses next to him on the couch. “Absolutely adore their name.” 

“Christ, El, your Louis’ lass.” Niall laughs with Barbara on his lap. 

“So? I can’t appreciate the rivalling team?”

“NO!” The friends laugh. Niall face palms himself. Eleanor is laughing into her own drink. 

“You did great, love. Beautiful goal babe.” She kisses Louis. They won against Tyldesley Tornados 0-1, because Josh was fouled and Louis nailed the penalty shot. Barbara’s parents were out of town, so the friends went to celebrate, also it was the Friday that marked the beginning of Spring Bank Holiday.

“Yeah well, looks like the girls are doing better at the moment.” Zayn says, while he plops down next to Perrie on the floor. A joint is hanging from his lips, and he gathers Perrie into his lap. Jade is throwing him disgusted looks.

“For sure! We’re all very proud.” Louis throws her a kiss and a wink, Zayn’s forehead creases. His eyes had been glued to Louis the entire night. It made Louis a little anxious, but mostly a little annoyed. _You got something to say, do it!_

“Hate to say it, but we’re shit without Ashton.” 

“You might be right. But I’m not hassling to get that fucker back on the team.” Liam argues. 

“I don’t want to make anyone nervous, but my Ma is going to come to the away game. No fucking about right? We’ll win!” Niall said while Barbara started twirling his short hair on his head. Harry reaches forward to knock on wood.

“Superstitious are you?” Louis chortles.

“A bit.” He whispers, blinking at him over his beer. _He’s flirting, right in front of Eleanor. The audacity,_ Louis chuckles. “I also believe in a horrorscope.” A smile breaks out on Louis’ lips, and he throws his head back laughing.

“Not funny.” He argues but Harry just shrugs smugly. He stands up to plop down on the arm of the couch. Zayn’s eyes follow Harry’s movement.

He bends down to whisper hotly into Louis ear “Niall was farting.” Louis chuckles, because it makes no sense, but he loves having Harry close. He touches his breastbone, soothing his chuckle and trying to calm his heart physically. Eleanor shifts next to him raising her eyebrow at him.

“What?” 

“Nothing.” She rolls her eyes in a Louis manner and looks back up. The crease in her brows lifts when she catches sight of someone. Louis looks over, it’s Max. This time he is clad in leather pants and sheer shirt, he looks down at his own jersey and jeans, _God, he’s pretentious._ Eleanor excuses herself with a kiss to Louis’ cheek, giving Harry a rather rude look and then bounds over to see Max. 

Astonishing there is no jealousy in his veins, no buzzing of anger, he’s still calm. Everything is entered around the warm knee pushing against his thigh. He looks back up at Harry, who is worrying his lip, he grabs Harry’s wrapped wrist, “what’s this? New tattoo?” Harry colours and tries to pry away his hand. “This looks new, Haz. What is it? When’d you do it?”

Harry opens the wrapping around it slowly, pulling time apart like his voice and shows it to Louis. “Got it after the thing…” Harry’s still unsure of what he should call it, incident? Attack? Homophobic beating? So he calls it _the thing._ Louis carefully claps his left wrist to look at it. In neat handwriting it reads ‘I can’t change.’ It hits home for some reason. 

“I love it, Harry.” he looks up at the boy. “This a quote from someone?”

“Yeah.” Harry nods, staring down at his wrist cradled between Louis’ fingers.

“Then you’re missing the quotations, love.” Harry chuckles loudly, spilling some of his beer as he leans forward. His dimples pop and his forehead flattens. It takes Louis a moment to go from paralysed to laughing. It hurts him a bit, to know that Harry is laughing so freely after being attacked for who he is. _It’s not a choice_ , that’s what Liam said. And who would choose this freely? _Being hated by society, looked down upon by the idiots of the world. I can’t change. It’s not a bloody choice, it’s who I am_. Another part of Harry’s life written plain as day on his skin. Telling the world to fuck off. It’s the kind of bravery that Louis is jealous of. 

“I’m jealous of you.” He reveals. Harry freezes. Their eyes stay connected for a while until a small understanding appears in Harry’s greens, like Louis transmitted some kind of information. “Want something to drink?” Louis quickly asks, _why don’t I have a bloody filter when I’m drunk?_

_“_ Another beer please.” 

“Cheap date.” Louis snickers and moves to head to the kitchen. His elbows lean on the counter, with a sob he wrecks through his hair. _Why can’t I have the bravery Harry has? Why can’t I even be honest with myself? Why is he so bloody perfect?_

Harry’s voice interrupts his thoughts “there’s nothing to be jealous of” Louis turns to the angel behind him, shakily taking a breath. Carefully Harry moves forward, grabbing Louis’ hand. He holds it up and starts counting off of Louis’ fingers. “I think you know that people here love you. They think your hilarious, great footie player, you push back against bullies, you push back against idiotic teachers.” He runs out of fingers and quickly says the last ones “and you’re cute. Hot actually. You fit in right away.”

Their eyes meet again and Harry’s read _so much more likeable than me._ “What they are saying about you is disgusting and it’s not true. You know that! You’re amazing!” Louis says, while Harry grabs his hips confidently. He’ll have to have this conversation now. Since he was a baby, all he knows is how to run from uncomfortable situations and feelings. These earnest attentive eyes scare the living shit out of him.

Harry shrugs, “I know a massive list of comments why people don’t like me. But they love you, nothing to be jealous of.”

“There is nothing that I can say to make this better for you, right?”

“No.” Harry shakes his head.

“I feel so powerless.” Louis whispers, held in place by Harry’s hold on his hips.

“I always wanted to be one of those people that doesn’t care about what others say about them, but” Harry’s eyes are welling up, and he has to swallow a big lump in his throat, “I just don’t think that I am.”

“You take too many things to heart.” Louis brushes away a small tear. “But you’re braver than most of us. You put it out there, Harry. You showed people who you are, most of us are too afraid of the backlash.”

“Just self-destructive then.” Harry chuckles sadly. Louis bends forward on his tiptoes and gives Harry a small kiss. His jaw looks much better now, but he’s too sad and self-loathing to deepen the kiss. Harry’s hands clutch Louis’ hips tighter. Louis grabs his shoulder to dive in for another kiss, pulling him down towards himself. Harry’s hands roam backwards over his bum, pushing him towards himself. 

“You fucking with me? Again?” Louis and Harry jump apart. Harry’s curls seem to blush in an attempt for the body to spread the blush further. Liam is staring at them irked he voices his annoyance “Eleanor is in the next room guys.”

Louis chuckles, rubbing his lips and Harry brushing his hair back. “You could make yourself useful and stand watch.”

Liam walks to the kitchen aisle to grab a sandwich. “Not helping you guys. Hate this shit. Why am I the only one to know? You know we could spread out the misery.”

“Love you too Li. Great seeing you, thanks for keeping our secret.” Louis says while he ignores the eager Harry biting on his knuckles. The blush makes space for pale skin.

“Stupid fucker.” Liam grunts annoyed, while Niall says the same thing when he enters the kitchen. He heads for the kitchen counter making a new drink. 

“Sits in there all pretentious like he still has a place here.” 

“Who we talking about?” Louis asks. 

Niall’s head shoots up “Zayn of course.” His eyes fixate on Louis and then on Harry. His eyebrow quirk up when he sees Harry’s pale shocked skin, but his cherry plush lips. _Does he know?_

“He left you guys right?” Harry asks, voice barely audible. Niall stares at him hard. _He definitely knows. Why shouldn’t he, of course, Harry told Niall everything! He’s his best friend. Fuck! No more witnesses!_

“Yeah he said that he never talked to you. ‘Like ever’ is what he said I believe.” Liam says, attentively watching Harry.

“That’s a lie.” Harry’s outrage makes his voice stronger again. “We were friends when we were little.” 

“We believe you.” Niall assures Harry. “He’s obviously a liar H. He played football with us, remember?” Jade enters the kitchen looking bemused at the little group surrounding the kitchen aisle at different angles.

“Oh right.” Jade walks towards Louis to grab a beer out of the fridge behind him, her eyes not leaving Harry.

“Hi.” Zayn is standing in the doorway. “I’m not sure why I deserve your hate, but I fucking miss you alright?” His pupils are blown, making it impossible to see his true eye-colour. Jade defensively takes position on Louis’ left side. 

“That the apology you fabricated for me or Perrie?” Louis grunts, his hand finding the small of Harry’s back to his right, frustrated he clutches his t-shirt there. Zayn’s eyes dot between Louis and Harry and the connection through Louis’ arm.

“How are you H?”

“Don’t talk to him!” Louis growls.

“I’m fine.” Harry says, his cute rabbit teeth leaving his knuckles alone to gnaw on his bottom lip, staring at Louis.

“That’s good, great even.” 

“I said leave him out of this.” Louis snarls, making his territory clear.

“Wasn’t our fight all about him?” Zayn asks confused, again looking at his right arm tucked in Harry’s back. Louis lets go of the shirt, in favour of pushing the curly haired boy behind his back, a hand protectively circling around his hip. Securing him between the counter and himself. He feels a soft hand grab the fabric of his shirt between his shoulder blades. He’s taller than Louis, which is why Louis’ body doesn’t actually hide him from Zayn’s view.

“What did you come here to say?” Liam asks, right on time before Zayn can ponder on Louis’ actions for too long. 

“Wanted to say sorry. I should have come with you. Not just for ha…” he stops himself from saying the name when he sees the fire in Louis eyes “him.” He points at Harry’s head poking out over Louis’ shoulder. “But also because we’re mates, yeah? Should have done it because we’re friends.” 

“You actually think that’s going to work? That’s the lamest apology ever!” Jade calls. 

“Wasn’t talking to you Jade. Remind me where you were when it all went down?” Louis knew the answer to be babysitting. 

“Jade helped us find your replacement, prick.” Niall steps up, waving off Barbara so that she hides in the shadow of the kitchen door.

“What do you want me to say?” Zayn asks desperation seeping through his voice. “I’m sorry, alright? I miss you, fuckers. All of you fuckers. Even Miss Pissy-pants over there.” He points to Jade. “Louis please, I will never leave you again, won’t ever disappoint you again.” Louis grunts. “I got the Ibiza house for us for summer. Let me make it up to you.”

Louis looks over to Liam and realises that the big softy has already forgiven the fucker. Silently they come to an understanding, because apparently their friendship has evolved to silent speech. It’s annoying really, how his friendship to Liam seems securer and stronger than with his actual best mate Zayn. “Fine.” He says. “Your on probation mate.” He walks toward him and hugs him hard.

“You bloody joking right?” Jade calls.

“Were boys. We forgive fast.” Liam grins. Harry starts wrangling his hands and stares up at Zayn. 

“We do talk.” He lamely says when Zayn approaches him. “You know me longer than any of the others and you let them hurt me.”

“I’m sorry H.” Zayn pulls him into a hug, but Louis can see that Harry has not forgiven him. His eyes are shut painfully, like the embrace is physically hurting him.

The Friday after the end of the May holidays, Louis is standing on the home turf of the Tornados. The pitch is wet and a little squishy underneath his cleats, it had been raining in the morning, but it was dry now. His sisters were sitting together with Mark, _with dad._ His new girlfriend wasn’t here, but he could see Fizzy role her eyes at something Eleanor is telling her and Lottie. He makes a show of pulling out her phone, so that she can avoid El. A few seats away, Harry is holding up a #8 sign with Barbara. A small woman with blondish hair was standing with them, throwing her head back in a beam of a laughter that made her undoubtedly related to Niall. “You nervous?” Sandy asks. 

“You?” Both nod. They chuckle silently before they huddle up with the rest of the team.

“Let’s beat them!” Sandy starts his pep talk. “Just remember, it’s just a game alright? We don’t have to win, but we do have to have fun, yeah?” 

“Winning sounds great.” Niall interjects.

“So let’s go out there and win!” They stomp their feet and spit into the middle of the huddle in a superstitious preparation.

There is no sun peeking out through the clouds today, so Sandy chooses to get the ball first when he wins the coin flip. They head off to a good start with a couple of goal opportunities, but it quickly becomes apparent that this isn’t a fun game. Both teams still have a chance to move up to the semi-finals. The Crusaders have to win or tie, but the Tornados still have a shot at finals if they win 2-0. The first Tornado goal comes shortly before the first half. Louis slips on the wet grass during the pursuit and stumbles forward, while the Tornado player dribbles through Liam’s feet. It’s not a cakewalk for him, but being cheered on by the loud home town bleachers he plays better than ever before. Louis screams at the grass when he sees the ball in the net. He turns to the bleachers where he sees Mark clapping encouragingly. The Crusader’s mascot is cradling it’s big head in its hands, but Louis knows whose underneath it, and he’d rather see her fall over.

Second round started with an accident, _honestly it was!_ After the first few minutes, a Tornado player is lying on the ground cradling his ankle in pain. The unofficial fair play rules ask the other team to shoot the ball in the out, so that the injured player can be attended to. Louis has the ball.

With too much force he shoots it in the out, but he had a small target, the mascot. She screams when she sees the ball and it knocks her out, the helmet falling off of her dyed blonde head. Her blue shocked eyes stare at Louis accusingly when she sits back up. There is an ugly red spot on her forehead. Louis giggles to himself, _that should teach her right._ During halftime, he had seen her flirt with Harry over at the bleachers. Hemming’s shakes his head at him with a crinkle by his eyes. 

After the player gets substituted, the elbows and kicks come out. The play becomes rough with tripping feet, illegal holding of shirts and one handball. Niall positions the ball in front of him and waits for the whistle, he breathes in and out. And passes it to Louis, Louis gives it up to Calum and then back at him. Louis takes the shot, the goalie stretches his body, tummy stretching like a cat and his fingers brush the ball. It hits the sidebar and is back in the game, Niall jostles forward to kick it, but the goalie catches it, smiling proudly at himself. He _shoots_ it out far. S _hit._ Tornados players switch fast and the Crusaders last defender is standing too low, _no off sides! Shit!_ His gut clenches and his eyes panic when he sees the Crusaders goalie struggle between two forwards coming towards him. They shoot. They score. Louis falls to his knees. No semi-finals. Dread creeps into his veins, and he feels his disappointment seep into his clothes.

Friendly they shake the cheering teams hand, before Liam slings an arm around Louis. “Hey. Next year yeah?”

“Next year is our last chance, pal.” Louis slithers out of the embrace. “Last school year, last chance.” Liam nods and watches Niall skip towards his Ma. She pets his cheek softly whispering sweet nothing’s into his ear. Louis sees his own family waiting for him. Louis kicks the grass out of revenge. “Hey Louis?” Louis looks back at Liam, who was staring at his own family thoughtfully. Three girls and a sweet round faced woman that were motioning for him to come over, ‘introduce your friend,’ his sister calls. “Are we still friends, even you know, after all, footie is over now?”

Louis ogles him carefully, _he really doesn’t have that many friends, or he wouldn’t ask me that!_ He feels sorry for him. Liam is a good guy, soft-hearted and loyal as a brick. Sure he’s annoying and a know-it-all, but Louis is grown fond of him. “ ‘Course we are, mate. How else are we going to Ibiza together, ey?” Liam grins relieved, and Louis decides to give him a bear hug. _Bad idea, idiot is huge! How can anyone hug this idiot?_

He walks over to his family and gets a hug from the twins, who jump on him like koalas to a tree. “Alright, alright, let ‘m breath, girls.” Mark grabs them to detach from Louis, but Louis doesn’t mind. He loves his koalas. “You did good, son.”

“Thanks Dad. Didn’t win, though.”

“There is always next year.” Eleanor kisses him. Mark raises a surprised eyebrow, _right forgot to tell him about the bird._

“Wish everyone would stop saying that!” Louis muses. 

Later Eleanor tries to cheer him up, unsuccessfully, by telling him that they can go to the school disco now. The one that they would have had to forfeit in favour of going to the semi-finals. Louis is not pleased. He was hoping to be able to skip those shenanigans. The sacrifices of being in a relationship.

💚🍑💙

Louis thought that the disco would be a bleak affair, walking into a room full of teenagers with his sisters and Eleanor on his arm in a faint blue dress. He was told there’d be no booze, since it was a dance for both fifth and sixth form. They are greeted by an Italian boy as soon as they arrive in the balloon filled cafeteria. “God, you’re the most beautiful person in the entire dance.” He says reaching around to give Lottie a rose that he secures around her wrists.

“That’s sweet.” Louis addresses him, while Lottie is peering at him with hearts in the eyes. “You trying to make a good impression.”

The kid shakes his head, “just wanted to make her smile.”

Louis lets out an endeared snicker “I’m Louis.”

“Tommy.” He nods curtly.

“Go on then, take her out. No funny business, though.” Tommy and Lottie quickly interlace their hands and run off towards their other friends. Louis looks at Fizzy with a funny expression “no date?” 

“Don’t do any of that business.” Fizzy remarks unfazed, uninterested.

“Aren’t you cool…?” Fizzy pokes her tongue out at him and pats Eleanor on the bum, before she wordlessly strides over to her girlfriends. “Special one that one.” Louis mumbles before he catches sight of Liam, Danielle, Zayn, Perrie and Luke. “Hey.” He says, bored already.

Eleanor rolls her eyes at him and grabs Sophia to find their girls. “Got this,” Zayn waves the joint in front of them. 

“In school? Are you nuts?” Danielle’s eyes are bulging out of their sockets. Zayn shrugs like that is the most normal thing. 

Liam shakes his head, mumbling “nah thanks.”

“Cheers.” Louis denies, shaking his head, “you got booze, though?” This time Liam grins and grabs a flask out of his jacket pocket. He gives it over to Louis who takes a sip. He gives it back, when Zayn exclaims that if they don’t want any, he’ll sell it to someone else. He walks off and Perrie excuses herself to go to Leigh-Anne and Jade, who are already dancing with Niall and Barbara. 

Eleanor and her friends come back, drinking on some punch that they get spiked with eager hands by Liam. Danielle chuckles with Eleanor’s friend Emma, when Louis catches sight of the entrance. Tommy might think that Lottie was the most beautiful person here, but Louis has a feeling that he just walked in. Clad in black tight pants, light brown Chelsea boots and a colourful dress shirt. The shirt is open almost to his belly button, allowing the love banner to proudly peak out of his shirt. His curls look soft and fall freely around his face, the usual headscarf discarded for a rolled up bandana hanging off of his neck like a necklace. Louis swallows harshly and tries to hide the pull of jealousy in his gut when he sees mascot girl, hanging on Harry’s arm. Her annoying laughter spreads to his ears, and Louis pulls his eyes away, meeting brown ones instead. Liam looks over his shoulder and gives Louis a knowing smirk. “Fuck off.” Louis meekly argues.

Louis had an arm around Eleanor who had started swaying her hips, Louis knew of his inability to dance and was still not drunk enough to start any of this business. “So Liam said you’re going to Ibiza with the lads?”

“Oh yeah, meant to tell you sorry.” He forgot to tell her, because he was expecting her to go to a horse retreat or whatever.

“Do you want me to come too? You know, since Jade and Perrie might be coming for a week or two.” Louis freezes. _That’s a good question, do I want you to come?_ “Oh I see.”

“No. No.” He quickly gathers. “Sweetheart, I have so much on me mind right now, I don’t know what I want. I have to concentrate on them dumb end of year exams. If I fail, I have to repeat this year again! I can’t do that.” 

“I’m sorry, boo.” The childhood nickname rolls off her tongue too easy. 

“I thought you wanted to do this summer championship thing.”

“I did. My parents don’t, they think I should work on our relationship, keep you happy.”

“Fuck that!” Louis echoes against the music, facing her. “I want a successful and happy lass. You sign up for that tonight! I’ll fill out the application with you.” 

“OH LOU” El falls around his arms with tears in her eyes littering his face with wet kisses.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, ye ain’t no dog!” She lifts off of him and puts his arms around herself so that they can dance together. Her tiny bum is grinding against his thighs, and he decides to join the motion. That’s until he sees Harry doing a combination of a bad striptease and tele-tubby dance. Taylor is grinding down on his crotch and Harry looks like he’s enjoying it. Taylor’s arms circle the boy, and she cranes her neck to say something to him. Slowly Harry’s ringed up fingers delicately touch her hips, nothing like the forceful grab in Barbara’s kitchen. Taylor’s hand grabs a hold of his curls and tucks him down onto her lips. Louis’ grip punches Eleanor’s bum dominantly against his pelvis. She moans where she is standing, _right I’m semi-hard. It’s those damn lanky legs, they look so delicious, trapped in those tight pants, from over here._ Taylor’s lip motorboat Harry’s, trying to swallow him whole. Their lips part and their tongues openly meet. _Ugh, disgusting._

“Oh Jesus, someone make them stop.” Danielle groans next to him. 

“Sure thing, darling.” He detaches from a flabbergasted Eleanor and walks over to where Niall and Barbara are dancing. “ ‘xcuse me.” He pushes through them so that he is facing the ugly make-out session in front of him. “You don’t mind do you, love?” He doesn’t care for Taylor’s baffled slur, but grabs Harry by the wrist, forcing him out of the embrace. Of course the oaf stumbles like Bambi when he follows Louis' insistent tugging.

Louis pulls him off the dance floor. In the safety of the hallway outside Louis pushes the boy against the wall. They are hidden between two massive show cases of college trophies, Louis places both hands next to Curly’s head. Leaning over him, he sees Harry’s lips are red and bitten and there is a patch of large saliva sliding over them. Louis can’t help but think that’s what he would look like if I could come on his face. But its evidence someone marked him and Louis suddenly placed his shirt-covered wrist over Harry’s mouth and roughly rubs at them. Harry raises his own dainty fingers to stop the painful administration, but Louis’ hands are back on the wall. 

Harry’s green eyes mask confusion when he looks up at Louis through his long eyelashes. “Thought you came out as gay!” Is the first thing Louis says to him. 

“I don’t know yet, I might like both... I don’t like the boys in your class giving me labels nor you!” 

Louis watches him for a moment contemplating, but his annoyance is still there “how was it then?” 

“What?” 

“Her kiss? How was it?” 

“Oh... a little weird I suppose… there was a lot of tongue, and she opens her mouth a little too big. It’s kind of slobbish.” Louis smirks, his anger disappearing in favour of pride for his own kisses. Harry is playing with the hem of his shirt again, accidentally opening his last button. With quivering fingers he tries to get it back in its hole but it's not working. He’s too nervous. 

“I like your shirt... suits you!” 

Harry beams up at him giving Louis a dimpled smile “it’s one that you gave me.” 

“Yeah, yeah, I remember the flamingos.” 

Harry looks down at the animal print with knitted brows, “I think their pelicans.” Louis just raises his eyebrow in fondness. _This boy_! 

“Kind of marks you as mine doesn’t it?” He doesn’t wait for Harry’s answer, just bends forward to lick beneath Harry’s ear, the boy squirms. He kisses beneath his earlobe and pulls on it. “I like when you are marked as mine, even if she kisses you, you are dressed in my colours… inked with a symbol of our first meeting… belong to me.” His right hand eases itself off of the wall in favour of grabbing Harry’s hip. He moans. Louis hand tickles inside his open shirt and finds his left nipple standing at attention with the bed of his thumb he circles it slowly, making the boy underneath him quiver. “Bet you’re getting hard baby. How do you fit that large cock of yours inside them tight pants, do you have to tuck it?” But again he doesn’t give Harry time to answer as he spreads Harry’s right leg away from his middle so that he can step in-between them. 

Rubbing their pelvises together he slightly lifts Harry off of the ground. He moans into Harry’s skin when their hard cocks find each other. Their thighs are pressed against each other, holding Harry up with Louis’ muscle strength only. He rubs himself upwards and finally lifts his face out of Harry’s neck and looks at his face. Harry’s in bliss. Louis leans down and finally places a kiss on those puffy ones. He kisses him right back of course, lips tentatively puckering against each other. Soft noises of kisses flitter through the hallway, but Louis doesn’t deepen it. Just lets those electric volts happen one after another. Its soft and gentle and more like an after sex kiss than anything. He enjoys the tiny rubs and smacks apart, delving back in and tasting the sweetness before separating to kiss him from another angle. 

His puffys always ready for another. He wishes he could cocoon himself in with Harry. Hold on to him all night and litter those addictive lips with kisses till the dark stretches into day. But they’re not home or in a cocoon, they’re in college. It’s a wonder no one has found them yet. Both of their eyes are still closed when Louis separates their last kiss with a tiny plop. “Now compare that to your slobber.” He chuckles, pressing a last kiss to his lips before detaching himself completely. 

He walks away from Harry but from a last glance he can see his red face desperately trying to will his hard on to go down. His hand inch to his sipper, but it doesn’t go down and Harry bites his own lips to hide his moan that comes out instead.

With a chuckle Louis walks into the cafeteria again, he doesn’t care if someone sees his hard on. Liam is already giving him an appraising one’s over when Louis approaches Danielle and steals her flask to take a large gulp. “Just realised why dances aren’t too bad.” Danielle giggles, though she hardly knows what he is talking about. 

“Have you guys seen Zayn anywhere…? He’s supposed to be here with me, but I haven’t seen him all night since we arrived.” 

“Saw him hand out some spliffs, but he’s been a bit shady.” 

Perrie looks sad “oh ok with you too? ‘Cause I thought he might be cheating on me or something?” 

“Who in their right mind would cheat on you?” Louis tried to calm her down. Perrie shrugs and over her shoulder Louis can see Harry come back into the room. He walks back to the dance floor where Barbara, Niall and Leigh-Ann are still dancing. As soon as he has joined them Taylor rushes to Harry’s side and hugs him from behind. But Harry looks pliant in her arms, and he can see Niall lean forward to ask if he’s ok. “He hasn’t talked about anyone but you Perrie. He loves you.” Louis supplies into his own conversation. 

“Well then I guess we’re almost over. One day, he comes to my house completely high and I have to deal with his come down. The next, he talks about proposing and the following days I hear absolutely nothing from him. Me mum thinks his drug addiction is getting worse. I’m worried!” Liam is giving Louis a look, and they both don’t know what to say. 

“Look Pez, you need to talk to him about that. But he’s not with us, not since the pool thing where he just walked out. I mean even Louis doesn’t go over to his shed no more.” Eleanor supplies. 

They all look a little mad. Zany’s cowardice has somewhat split him away from the group, and his whereabouts are usually unknown. The apology had repaired normal interactions with him, he was always invited to group invitations and the lads all planned a summer holiday together. But Louis didn’t go over to his shed, he rather sits in his treehouse with Liam and Niall joking about idiotic things. Drinking beer instead of smoking puffs. 

“How can he stand that girl” Leigh-Ann pops her curly black hair into their middle. She’s talking to Perrie, but loud enough for them to hear.

“Who?” 

“Taylor! She’s been all over him, and I don’t get it. She’s just so clingy, she’s been talking about him for weeks now, can’t believe he actually took her to the dance. Poor Barbara almost killed her a few minutes ago.” 

“Don’t worry…it won’t last.” Louis tried to comfort her. Liam is giving him an incredulous look. Louis rolls his eyes per usual “he said she’s slobbering into the kiss. She’s a slobber.” The group burst out into laughter and Leigh-Ann seems beyond happy to have a nickname for the girl. She beams and takes Perrie’s hand, tearing her back towards Harry’s group and Jade. Perrie giggles to herself and lets Jade hug her and sway with her. Louis envies their friendship, they hold together no matter what. 

“Are you that worried about the exams?” Eleanor asks while she is leaning over him. She’s palming his dying erection, her own dress lying discarded on the floor next to his own clothes.

Louis throws himself on his stomach, hiding his cock from her. She lets out an angry breath while she watches his naked bum. She pokes it “it jiggles Lou! Don’t footie players do workouts? Like what’s going on with your ever fattening bum?” 

“Shut up.” Louis’ retort dies in the pillow. “You should devour it, it’s perfect.” _That’s what Harry thinks._ Louis remembers the porn he had been watching a few days before. He’s already in the right position, just need El to do it. Maybe that’ll get him back to full harness. “You could lick it.” 

Eleanor freezes and the screams “eww.” Louis feels goosebumps standing up on his legs, a roll of sweat travels down his back, shivers eloping his fear. The cold touch of it running into his heart like a lightning bolt. _Don’t make fun of me, please. Shit. I got to…what do I say now? She’s disgusted by me. Stop. Tell her it was nothing. Was just an idea. Don’t knock it before you try it. What if she tells others? “_ Are you serious, Lou? That’s so disgusting.”

He turns around to her, hoping that his face isn’t too pale “jeez, El! I was joking.” El is looking at him with wide disgusted eyes, hands clutching against each other over her bra.“Just get on your hands and knees.” Louis orders.

“What?”

“You want to get fucked tonight then get on your bloody hands and knees or get out.” Eleanor does as told, tingling from Louis’ decisive tone. “Take your bra off. And don’t look at me.” He watches her for a moment, hand flopping on his cock. Remembering the perky bum dance in its confinements against Niall in the last hour of the disco. Grinding down on Taylor, letting her become his strip pole. He’s hard in seconds, he rolls the condom on and positions himself behind her. Slowly he pushes her panties out of the way, imagining peeling off panties from the boy’s lanky legs. He pushes inside, kissing along the spine, imagining deep rumbles of pleasure. Imagines hitting his prostate, hearing him queek in surprise when he finally gets to twist a nipple. She comes before him, but Louis continues using her until he comes with images of curly’s lips parted from an avalanching orgasm.

The last weeks of lower sixth form, Louis spends a lot of time studying with Eleanor and Liam. Coming to the conclusion that they are both book-smart, and they have a calm learning routine. He still goes to footie, practice still stands and so does the ceasefire, making it much more enjoyable to play. There are no more matches, but that honestly frees everyone up to study. 

He studies hard, trying to push away the nagging feeling in his mind that lingers there. The memory of Eleanor’s disgusted queek. It’s fighting with the memory of the night with Luke. And pushed aside by the feeling of calm he gets when he thinks of Harry. They are all replaced by looking at Ashton and Calum, reminding him not to be brave or there is a fight to have. But then there is that timid voice _there is nothing to be jealous of,_ provoking him to be brave. His mind is running loops and loops every day and every night. Heart clenching in its cage. _Cage without a door._ He muffles a frustrated scream when he walks downstairs to grab some sweets, trying to re-energise his brain to get him back to think of biology, not Harry. _I want Harry, but I can’t, but I could, if I wanted I could, am I ready? What if I decide I don’t like it after all? Is life with Eleanor so bad? It could be better, with him everything is better._ “No! Lottie!” He hears from the kitchen as Louis descends the stairs hidden from view. “Don’t give Harry a plus one!”

“Why not?” Louis completely freezes.

“It’ll break Louis’ little heart.”

“But if I don’t give Harry a plus one, I can’t give Gemma a plus one.”

“Well whoopdy bloody do. No plus ones for children!” Fizzy defends.

“Come down Félicité please.” His mother calls out. Louis can feel his heart racing in his chest. 

“Give Harry the plus one for Christ’s sake Lottie.”

“You two are the worst of family members.”

“Fizzy control your temper please.” 

“No, no, no!” She exclaims with a staccato in her voice “no bloody loyalty right here.” There is a tapping sound like Fizzy is drumming her index finger into the table-top. 

“Félicité Grace! Cool off.” Jay barks and Louis can hear a chair scrapping. Before he knows it, Fizzy is staring up at him from the last step. 

“You ok, Louie?” She asks softly, very uncharacteristically of her. Louis shakes his head, his vision is swimming, and he didn’t even notice that tears had started forming in his eyes. The mere thought of Harry bringing another man to his own mother’s wedding had his stomach swimming in acid. Fizzy bounds up the couple steps and takes him into her arms. The sweet side of Fizzy hugs him, her hand caresses his hair, and she is kissing the side of his face silently. For all her underworld heritage, she was still Louis bean of comfort. There’s no better hugs than this sister could give, she crushed him and held him like a baby at the same time. 

“Don’t let him bring a date, please!” He whimpers into her shoulder. 

“I’d never!” She whisper-shouts back, a little of her devilness brushing back into her demeanour “I’d rather steal the invitation back from the bloody postman and exchange it for a fake one then let that piece of paper into that curly haired idiot’s hands.” And Louis knows she ain’t lying which brings a small smile on his lips. “You want to talk or somewhat?” 

“I don’t know.”

“Come on, I’m supposed to cool off anyways. She holds his hand in hers when she drags him upstairs. On Fizzy’s bed they make Netflix play Peaky Blinders, while Fizzy magically lets coke and sour gummies appear from underneath her bed. They don’t talk for a while. 

“How’d you know?”

“The rose. The shirts. The birthday gift. The hug after it! The fight. The way you look at him when he enters a room, like he’s the only person in the world. The way he looks at you as if the sun shines out of your ass.”

“It’s a very fine bum… I’m guessing I don’t look at El that way.” Fizzy’s snort is his answer. “I can’t be with him.”

“Okay.” 

“No really I can’t.”

“Whatever you say big bro.”

“What?”

“Whenever the twins say that they want something, like becoming a princess, and mum tells them that it’s impossible, you whisper to them that some things are worth fighting for.” Fizzy tares her eyes off of Cillian Murphy. 

“This is different, though.” Louis picks out his favourite sours. 

“I don’t know how to help you Lou, but I want you to be happy.”

“I don’t know what I want.”

“Then you need to find out, you’re so confused, boo.”

“Deep down, you’re a sap, Fizzy.” He pinches her cheeks.

She swats him away “do me a favour, don’t let Eleanor dictate you finding yourself, just because you’re with her now, you can still change your mind. Don’t let her make this decision for you.” 

“Yeah I know.” He sits up toppling the laptop on the floor. “Thanks baby.” He falls into her arms and licks her cheek. 

“Fuck off.” She kicks him off of her, but they go back to snuggling almost immediately after. “You better not have broken me laptop.” She fusses when she gets her laptop back in front of them. “Unlike her nose,” she points at Annabelle Wallis. “I cannot safe a broken laptop. That was definitely broken and remade.” Louis laughs.

Louis is studying management terms in his head when he walks his usual walk to the horse stalls. Walking past the paddock and into the barns where the horses are kept. He hears someone greet him before he rounds the corner to step into the enclave where Aqua is held. Right there leaning against the horse box, Eleanor is leaning against Max’s chest. Their lips are touching, curling into each other. Max is holding her loosely on her waist as if he didn’t know if he’s permitted to do so. Their eyes are closed, and they almost look in pain. Louis clears his throat loudly. 

Both jump apart, Eleanor's hands remain on Max’s chest while he has tried to take a step back. Shock clearly written in his face. “Babe it’s not what it looks like.” Eleanor starts defending.

“Shut it.” Louis demands. “Max clean Aqua up for El…”

Eleanor’s face splits into annoyance for a second at Louis shortening her horses name again. “Her name is Aquitaine.” 

Louis ignores it “You follow me.” He turns around without looking at them and walks out to his car. Obediently El follows, once she is seated on his passenger side she opens her mouth again. “Lou, can we talk about this. It really isn’t what…”

“…it looks like.” Louis finishes “yeah yeah. Just shut up until I tell you to talk.” Louis, isn’t usually this rude to her, but he needs a think. He starts the car and starts driving. Fizzy’s words on replay in his mind. He gets to the Starbucks and sends El out to get them coffee. _Why can’t I just leave? I need a real think… all this and all that... Harry, Liam, Zayn, Perrie, Jade and Eleanor. Harry and Eleanor. Exhausting that is! Harry and Eleanor. Harry… Harry._ The door opens again and El puts the two cups into the holder. 

Louis starts driving again, Eleanor is fumbling with her hands, wanting to reach out to her phone to answer the demanding text messages waiting for her. Louis parks on a small hill across a small farm just outside of town. The cows are staring up at them while the silence in the car becomes uncomfortable. Louis takes a sip of a caramelised cappuccino that Eleanor got him in hopes to make him sweeter towards her. He’d roll his eyes, but his mind was to busy doing other things. “This the first time?” Louis finally asks. 

“No.” Eleanor answers directly. Louis likes that about her, no wishy-washy answers just straight honest truth. “We’ve danced around each other for the last two years.” She continues when Louis doesn’t interject to stop her. “When I got with you, he told me he was down with it, but that he’d want to do just one thing for once, and he kissed me.” She is smiling softly at her hands. Louis almost finds it endearing. “I obviously pulled away right away.” She reassures looking back at him. “It just happened two or three more times where I initiated it.” 

Louis wants to reassure his mind that they are even now, _how many times have I kissed or touched Harry?_ But his gut isn’t that easily deceived. A small part of his mind wants to scold her for betraying him like this. “I’m going on a trip.” He says instead. “The entire summer, Doncaster and then Ibiza. I need some time to think away from this place.” He points at the cows and wants to snort at their obliviousness _wouldn’t life be easier as a cow. Can cows be gay?_ But El nods next to him, brining him back to the subject. “I think we should go on a break.” 

El shifts in her seat uncomfortable. 

“Figure out all the shit we need to figure out?” She asks.

“Yeah. There’s too much going on in my head right now.” She takes his hand reassuringly. 

“It’s not just about me is it?” Louis shakes his head. 

“Okay but it has to be a Ross break, not a Rachel break.” She clarifies. Louis smiles from the Friends reference. So she wants to be able to sleep around on their break.

“That’s fine.” 

“Sleep with WhoEver you want.” She gives him a pointed look that Louis doesn’t like. “And after summer we reconvene.” 

Louis smile breaks out again hearing her business voice “let’s reconvene before the wedding, me mum will flip if I change anything about her plans, that includes plus ones.” Eleanor is smiling now, they both are. Both realising that this break was a mutual wish from both of them. 

“Speaking of parents, can we keep this break on the down low, my parents will give me an earful if I am single again.” 

Louis holds out his hand towards her “deal.” 

“Deal!” Their hands clamp together over the centre consul. All four eyes glittering with mischiefand relief. 

💚🍑💙

Biology exam was a disaster, he couldn’t stop thinking about _Harry, Ibiza, Harry and Ibiza_. He gave the exam back a little too early and left the room with a worried glance from Eleanor and Liam, who were still desperately scribbling something into their tests, trying to make as much of the time they had left as they could.

The hallway is empty when he walks toward his locker. Something catches his sight, and he heads somewhere else, letting his gut lead the way. He startles the boy when he starts talking “I’m going away for the summer. Zayn’s got this house in Ibiza, well his uncle does anyway. I need to spend some time thinking, you know…alone.” He tells Harry, who is slowly turning around to him. 

They stand alone in the hallway, Harry is leaning against this locker. His brow furrowed with concentration and his greens bearing into the blue. “Oh okay.”

“Friends yeah?” Louis asks hopeful.

Harry nods “friends.” Louis turned around to walk away when Harry called back to him “I’ll miss you!” _Fuck it!_ Louis turned around, hurrying to close the distance and with a loud bang Harry collides with the locker behind him with their lips attached. Harry immediately opens his mouth to him, to allow their tongues to mingle. Electricity moves through Louis like walking into the sun, warmth spread from the hairline to the toes. He’s tasting Harry’s tongue for the first time, arousal plummets into his groin. Harry moans silently. Louis hands grab his boy by his middle, slipping between the dress shirt of their uniform and brushing the small nipple there. He’s sensitive and let’s out a louder groan accompanied by goosebumps across his arms. Louis smirks with pride. The bell rings, and Louis frantically detached their lips. The hallways started to fill with students.

“Fuck, I just can’t stop with you!” Louis whispered against the locker that he was now leaning against and Harry was smiling happily. Proudly. _Addictive he is. Even those dimples are addictive as fuck._ “I’m still going to Ibiza.” Louis stubbornly breaths, causing Harry to burst some bubbly giggles. Louis grabs his hand, and they run for it, past the weird looks and all their friends.

Kissing they stumbled into the heat of Harry’s bed. “Lou…” Louis hands grabbed his blouse and rips it in two. He didn’t really know he could do that but the buttons spread across the bedsheet. The six-pack is jumping beneath his hand. “Lou…what are we doing?” 

Louis looked up at him, one hand pressing against his chest with his full weight, his breath fans over Harry’s face “I’m trying to devour your body right now, love.” He attached his lips to Harry’s jaw, where his neck starts. Harry goes completely pliant beneath him, rubbing his pelvis against Louis stomach, trying to get any friction that he can. Louis bends down to take Harry’s right nipple into his mouth and bites it. Taking a hold of Harry’s curls, he tugs on them, while pulling at his nipple. A rod bumps in a twitch against his stomach and Louis moans from how turned on Harry is, _because of me!_ “Fuck, Harry.”

“Nghh ohhhh.” Harry moans. Louis rearranged himself a top of him to press their clothed hard-ons against each other. Grunting out a moan himself, Louis becomes frantic. Moving their clothed cocks together, holding himself up by Harry’s chest. Harry is wincing beneath him and his legs try to circle his hips to get closer. Louis allows him to do so with his right leg, but rearranges himself so that his left-hand his pushing Harry’s open, inner thigh outward like a stretch. It opens Harry up, and Louis rolls become more intense. He sees Harry’s eyes roll to the back of his head. “Uh oh nh ah.” Harry makes the most beautiful noises. “mha. neh.” They spur Louis on to go faster, making him lose himself. Harry keeps on making his cute little noises, while Louis bites his bottom lip bloody in the attempt to stifle his moans, so he can hear Harry. Curly’s hand grab his bum and helps him grind tighter against him. A pleasure shots through him and he knows he’s close. 

“You close baby?” Louis breathes out, not stopping in his movements. 

“Mh…ye..ah..” Louis smiles when he sees Harry’s stretched neck, head thrown back, lips open wide to breath and moan loudly. “So beautiful.” Louis moans, Harry’s eyes open to look at him, still desperately grinding. A hand leaves his bum and travels up his spine. Delicate long fingers playing along his back, touching tentatively with care. Louis moans loudly and comes in his pants, his head falls on Harry’s chest. He can still feel Harry rubbing upwards against his softening cock. He lifts his head to looks at the desperate green. Louis’ hand travels between them, and he cups Harry’s cock through his pants roughly. 

“Louis…” 

“Sh… baby… I’m here to help.” Harry makes a primal bone-shivering groan, when Louis roughly rubs him “come for me, Curly. Go on.” Harry’s eyebrows furrow, his lips part in an o, and he makes a tiny little moan. Louis can feel the wet patch of his release slowly sift through his fingers. “Well done.” He whispers praise when he starts kissing his open mouth, tasting his bottom lip between his own. 

“That was good.” Harry whispers, his body is twitching with after-shocks. Louis smiles and keeps kissing his jaw and cheek. 

“Your perfect baby.” The words roll shocks through him. _Why do I have to say that to him?_ Louis sits up between Harry’s dead open legs. His fingers trail over his stomach, delicately follows the pleasure trail, beholding the gorgeousness beneath him, travelling up to Harry’s expecting eyes. He’s clearly enjoying Louis’ attention. Louis smiles down at him with fondness in his eyes, one he seems unable to hold back.

“You’re amazing too.” Harry hoarsely informs him. He sounds like he ran a marathon.

“Thanks.” Louis grins cheeky. 

And suddenly Harry pores his heart out in two simple sentences “I wanted you since the day I met you. You just have to be brave enough to want me back!” Harry’s voice is quite strong and soft at the same time. His big eyes sparkle with hope, sprinkling green when they look into Louis dark blues. Louis’ rakes his hand through his hair, clearly in confusion and disorientation. There is a lot battling in his mind, and he can feel himself being ripped apart from the inside. 

Louis sit’s back and looks down at the beautiful creature below him. “I have never done this before... I’ve never… committed... to a boy before... I don’t know how any of this works.”

“Then let me show you.” Harry sits up, cupping his jaw he lets the lip slot together. As cliché as it sounds the world stops. Louis sees stars behind his eyelids, an entire volcano of butterflies flop their tiny little wings inside his gut, screaming how perfect this is, how being with Harry is the right thing. His heart is doing overtime to indicate how much he wanted this right from the get go. But there is something tugging him back, one chamber of his heart ripping him away, telling him about rejection and hurt. Wishing him away from Harry.

But he reaches around to push Harry closer to him. Looping his arm under the small of his back, pushing him up into his lap. Not that he wants to engage in more sex with him, but he wants him as close as possible, make him a part of himself. Slowly they detach. Louis lets his forehead fall against Harry’s. “God, your just perfect.” He whispers, afraid his voice will break if he goes louder. He opens his eyes and sees Harry biting his lip with a hopeful smile. “I don’t…” He starts again.

“Be brave for me!” Harry whispers and slots their lips back together. The world goes quiet again as he falls down the rabbit hole of Harry’s plush lips. So perfectly aligned with his own. 

“This is very...” he looks down onto his crotch. “I don’t know baby… this is a lot.” He closes his eyes and fixes his pants when he stands up, Harry slides off of his thighs, bum hitting the matrices. Thankfully his release isn’t too obvious in his pants, unlike Harry’s deep patch.“I don’t know how to do this.” Louis feels himself panicking slightly when Harry’s face contorts. “You got to give me time.” 

“Okay.” Harry says his voice not breaking, he’s stronger more forceful than usual and Louis isn’t sure if he likes it. “I’ll wait,” Harry continues when Louis slips on his socks. _I wasn’t wearing shoes right?_ “But Lou, I don’t wait forever.” The words hang between them while Louis’ hand hovers over the doorknob. _At some point I will have to move on_. Is what Harry doesn’t say and Louis can feel green dragon poke its head into his stomach. He looks over to his sweet Harry “sounds fair. Bye Harold.” And he bolts. _Why didn’t I kiss him one last time?_

Louis tumbles down the stairs, stuffing his blazer into his backpack. Louis rushed past the kitchen, “Louis? Hello love.” Louis’ feet come to a sliding halt when he hears Anne’s voice. 

But he’s wearing his skittering socks, the ones he always wears to play catch with the twins in their new house, they just slide so perfectly. Which is how he loses his bearings and collides with one of the small tables in the entrée of the house, nailing himself in the crotch “Ouch.” He squeezes out. Thankfully he’s already leaning over to hold his balls so that he catches the fancy china that’s falling towards the floor. He puts it back on its display holder thing, before turning to Anne “Hi ye Anne and…” 

“Desmond.” Harry’s father supplies with a pained expression staring at Louis’ hands still holding his balls. “You alright kid?” 

“All good. Got to go, though. Nice seeing you.” He shuffles to the door as quickly as he can. 

“Well say hi to your mum for me.” Anne calls after him as the door falls shut into place. 

“Interesting Lad.” Des says inside. 

“That was Louis. Louis Tomlinson.” 

“Well shit…” Louis ties the shoes outside their window and runs to the car, getting out of the driveway as quickly as he can. 

Louis is frantically packing things into a bag. “What are you doing?” Dan asks from the doorway of Louis’ room.

“Please Da...” he can honestly not say what he said Dan or Dad it sounds so similar. Whatever he said Dan’s eyes soften. He approaches Louis and places his right hand on his, stilling the frantic packing movements. 

“What are you running away from?” 

Louis throws himself into Dan’s arms, tears falling freely. “Tell mum… I have to just get out of here a while.” 

“I will.”

“I love all of you. I need time.” 

“It’s okay. Just keep us in the loop!” Dan rubs his back soothingly. “Don’t want us to worry, do you?”

“Of course not. I’ll be back for your wedding, promise!” 

“Good. Now get out of here, before your mum comes home to stop you.” Louis hoists the bag over his shoulder and rushes towards the main door. He meets Fizzy in the driveway. She looks him up and down and silently nods. They fall into an embrace.

“Love you, Boo Bear.”

“Have a good summer, love.” He kisses her cheek and gets into Bertie. He starts the car and shifts into first gear. He waves at Dan and Fizzy, before driving off the lot. He heads towards the Motorway. Anywhere I can go. Anywhere where I want to be. Freedom.

💚🍑💙

_He’s coming back. He’s going to come back, and he’s going to fall to his knees and beg me to be with him. He’ll kiss me and ask me to be_ his _. Only his. Always his. Let me be yours, Louis, I’ll be your North, your anchor, your rope and your ship. I can centre you and you can free me. Let’s be free together._

_Come back to me!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some canon/explanatory notes…  
> 1\. All characters are fictional, but canon based.  
> The mentioned tattoo artist (Liam Sparks) was the one that tattooed Harry at least ten times. Similarly, Harry's co-workers Karen and Barbara can be seen in Harry's home scenes form ['This is Us'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ab7S_MIK28).  
> 2\. The Calder family is based on a blogpost theory on [rebloggy.com](https://web.archive.org/web/20160612015802if_/http://rebloggy.com:80/post/clive-calder-and-keith-calder/48216101359)  
> 3\. All of Harry's [tattoos](https://bulletprooflarry.tumblr.com/post/57816286830/timeline-tattoos-to-date) are real.


	5. Uncage Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy, Oh boy, here comes number five !  
> Sorry for the long wait, life’s gotten a little hectic right now. This chapter is a little shorter than the previous; I hope you enjoy.

“Shit, what happened to you?”

“You letting me in then?” Louis says. Mark opens the door a little worried, looking at the drenched puppy that is his son. “Please, don’t look at me like that! I’m going to take a shower, me balls about to drop off.” Mark just watches him walk upstairs, shoulder sagging down, like the water that is pulling him to the floor.

Louis enters his old room, the house is small and his room is tiny, it barely fits his bed and a tiny dresser with his old clothes. Clothes which mark him too flamboyant for Cheshire, things he left behind. Thoughtfully he looks at the red pants and lets his fingers intertwine with the suspenders. To be honest he doesn’t miss them, either of these, but there is a pang in his chest that he’d like to ignore. If it weren’t for the fact that he promised himself that he needs to figure out what he wants. _But what do old clothes say about me?_ Nothing really, except they mean everything. Lottie told him that Harry expressed himself with what he wears, Louis used to do that too.

Louis jumps into the shower, the little bathroom that he used to share with his sisters is still pink, which reminds him of Harry’s room. _Would Harry like me in suspenders?_ _Maybe if I dance naked in front of him in nothing but those dumb things attached to me boxers. Okay, weird._ He shakes his head when he climbs out of the tub-shower. Of course there is only a turquoise bath towel that used to belong to Lottie. 

He doesn’t bother putting his lenses back in and just grabs his old glasses. They are thin rectangular things that aren’t the most fashionable, but he finds it hard to care today. He grabs his red pants reminiscing and a black long sleeve. Louis checks his back pockets for the car keys, wallet and phone before bounding down the stairs. “Hey.” He says when he comes to a halt in the living room. Mark is sitting in one of the old chairs reading a book.

“You ready to talk?” 

Louis shakes his head while he sits down on the coffee table. “I was going to ask for a house key, so I don’t wake you.”

“You going to Stan’s?” Mark knows him so well.

“Yeah.” Mark gets up to grab a key from a small box. He holds it out to him, “I will talk to you. Promise.” 

“Well, have fun.” Mark grabs him into a tight hug, kissing the top of his head, because he is that small. 

“Alright let me go ye buffoon.” Louis sniffles.

“You’re wearing your red pants again.” Mark wipes his own eyes, “the suspenders going to make a re-surfacing too?”

“Deffo not!” Louis barks, “those are hideous. Don’t know what I was thinking, mate.” Mark laughs and gently brushes his fringe. “I’m going to…” He beams and jumps away, while Mark smiles after him, saying something like ‘my boy.’

“Wey ey mate.” Louis cheerfully greets his friends. It feels like a year ago, when they finished lower sixth form together. Now his friends are celebrating the end of college, waiting for their results to know which university they can go to, what their futures will bring. Meanwhile, Louis is stuck going through another year of college. Life could have been easier, had his mother decided to stay that half a year so that he could finish and then move. But she had been selfish, wanting him home with her another year.

“Oi Tommo!” Stan gives him a hug.

“Where are your parents, mate?” 

“Off on a cruise, Italy and Croatia, I think.” He crunches up his face in confusion.

“Hi Lewis.” Hannah smiles at him, unsure where to put her hands. Louis crosses past the room to take her into an embrace. Oli passes him a beer eventually, and they lounge in the living room.

“Glad to see you still wear red pants mate.” Luke says when he takes a seat across from Louis. 

“Thought I make an effort today.” Louis lies offended, even though he is very aware that he doesn’t wear them anymore. He feels like he had to, the pants are little tight though, squeezing on his crotch.These would never work in Cheshire, where would he hide his boner? “Also still wear me glasses obviously.”

Hannah giggles and gets up, stretching in front of him “since this isn’t going to happen a lot.” When she sees Louis poke his tongue at her, “as if you were these around. C’mon I know you hate them.” Louis ignores her in favour of pushing them further up his nose by his middle finger, using the official sign language ‘fuck you.’ He doesn’t hate them per say, he hates how they make him look soft and vulnerable. He hates how other people stare at him when he wares them, people making fun of him.

Hannah giggles when the clicking sound goes off. “What are ye doing with that?” 

“Putting it on the ‘gram.” Hannah whistles happily. “Look so cute.”

“Argh,” Louis complains. “You know I hate that stuff!” 

“Oh come off it.” Hannah argues. “It’s just a story, it’ll disappear in twenty-four hours. Wait! You still don’t have instagram?”

“No!” Louis says. Oli, Stan and Luke give a groan of ‘we told you so’ and ‘stupid social media hater.’

“How do you ever stalk someone?” Hannah tsks, bewilderment clearly written on her face.

“There is such a thing as Facebook.”

“Yeah, but no one uses Facebook any more.”

“Since when?”

“Since our parents know all about it and trap us on there.”

“You serious?”

“Yeah wouldn’t want to put anything on that.” Oli laughs at Louis shocked face, “mate you really need to stop posting shit.”

“Aye get instagram! Then I can tag you.”Hannah calls excited.

“Don’t your friends in Cheshire use Instagram?” 

“Barely.” Louis has a think, Zayn uses it to post pictures about his art, Niall uses it to post his food (yes, he loves food that much!), and Liam has one so that he can post anything that could make him just remotely interesting to get more friends. He knows that Jade posts a lot about her parties and Perrie. There might be a picture or two of himself on there.

“Even if you don’t post anything.” Hannah explains, “it’s perfect for stalking.”

“Fine.” Louis’ annoyed now. He thrusts his phone towards Hannah. “Set it up.”

“Yay.” She squeals excitedly and gets busy downloading the app. 

“You get the plane tickets?” Louis asks Stan, choosing to ignore Hannah. 

“Yupp,” Stan grins.

“What’s your name then?” 

“Huh?” 

“Username. It can’t be Lewis Tomlinson.” 

“We’re all ready to go.” Stan grins at him, motioning between Stan, Luke and Oli. 

Hannah whines in question. “Fine how ‘bout Louis T?” He turns back to Stan “Full week then?” 

“Yeah that’s way to short. Louis? Not Lewis?” Hannah is typing on his phone.

Louis rolls his eyes, “put a 28 at the end.” 

Stan ignores Hannah. “Yes, full week. Same flight as you getting there and back on the eighth.”

“Okay… next… profile picture.” Hannah looks up expecting.

“Nice,” Louis grins at Stan. “So happy you’re coming, mate. Things with me and me mate Zayn still a bit off.”

“Leeewwiisss.” 

“What?” Louis huffs, turning his eyes back on Hannah.

“Profile picture…” she points at the phone, reaching to give it to him. 

“Go in my gallery, you choose. I trust ye.”

Stan continues talking when Louis eyes are back on him. “He did leave you hanging dry, mate.” 

“Yeah, never really went back to normal. Hoping this holiday will do something.”

“You’ll have all of us if shit goes sideways…”

“Who is this?” Hannah holds up his phone, interrupting Stan. On the screen they see Louis’ sneaky picture he took of Harry, while he was cuddling him watching American Football together. He had just finished his soup, and Harry had hugged his chest like he was a safety buoy. Harry’s cheeks bunched against Louis tummy and his eyelashes fan over his cheekbones, hiding his eyes. Louis’ one-eyed glance into the camera looks tired but pleased with himself.

“Why are you looking at me gallery?” Louis says, face accusing. His heart is pounding a race in his chest. He’s afraid it might just jump out.

“I’m looking for a profile picture for you!” _Is Hannah jealous?_ She is staring at him with a squinting eye.

“Then find one of meself!” Louis grunts and takes a swig of his beer. He pretends like this is the end of the conversation, and Hannah isn’t still holding his phone for everyone to see. 

“What the fuck is going on with you?” Hannah asks when she retracts the phone to go find an actual profile. 

“Leave him alone, Hannah.” Luke defends him, which earns Luke an evil look from Hannah. 

“I should never’ve forgiven him for cheating with you.” She looks back at the phone and twirls her lips into a sneer.

“Jesus, Han. It was just a kiss! Get over it!” Luke pinches his eyes with two of his fingers. Might have been more than one kiss, but they were mostly drunk during their snogging. It never really counted, there were no emotions attached.

“Yeah look at me and tell me it was just a kiss, prick!” _Hannah is jealous!_

“Give us me phone back!” Louis grabs the phone out of her hand and picks a random selfie. “Leave him out of it.” He’s not sure if he’s referring to Luke or Harry. 

Stan scoots his bean bag closers to him, “that the kid from the concert?” Louis ignores him. He can feel Stan’s eyes roaming him, Stan is the only one from his friends in Doncaster that know about Harry and their first encounter. “He’s still cute.” Louis groans from Stan’s words and rubs his eyes under his glasses. For a short moment he had forgotten that he was wearing them. They all know that Louis kissed Luke once during a night out while he was dating Hannah about a year ago. But they don’t know about any other boys. Maybe they think it is a one off, maybe they know that he cheated on Hannah more often. What would they say if they knew about Harry? Meeting Harry during the time Louis was with Hannah was not planned, and getting a blow job from him was too good to be true at the time. Louis had been so proud of scratching that off his bucket list he told Stan, but no one else, he didn’t want the rap as that guy. The guy that cheats on his girl. Stan is still leaning over to him, and the Luke is watching him, but Louis isn’t to keen on talking about this right now. 

“Oi Oli, ye ginger cunt, yer sister still a hot bird free to fly?” 

“Fuck off mate,” Oli grunts. The boys chuckle, “have to chain her to the kitchen one day.” 

“Might have to do that to mine too.”

“Which one?” Oli grins at Louis.

“Lottie, she’s dating some Italian.” Louis shakes his head in frustration, “just thought I’d have more time before they start dating ye know?” 

“Never have enough time!” Oli agrees.

“How’s the new step-dad?” Luke joins the conversation.

Louis is still openly wounded when he answers the first thing that comes to mind. “I think I called him dad before I left.” Louis stares at his beverage with a thoughtful expression.

“Well that’s going to be awkward.” Stan laughed, “what did Mark say to that?”

“Not like he was there to say something.” Louis deadpans, while he takes a swig of the warm beer. 

“Speaking of fathers.” Hanna says. “I heard that Troy was in town and apparently he was looking for your family.”

“What?”

“Mark didn’t say anything?” Hannah asks. A shiver runs down Louis' spine when he thinks about his birth father, his sperm donor. Cold sweat hugs the small of his back, while he curls in on himself. 

“Nah must have forgotten.” Louis lies while he fiddles with his phone trying to ignore the sick in his stomach. He has seen so little of his birth father, who was mostly just a sperm donor, sometimes he can trick his mind into believing that he doesn’t even know what he looks like. The man left his mother when Louis was a few days old, and he stopped paying child support arguing ‘that’s how he’s going to learn to be a real man. Fend for himself.’ _A real man?_ Louis scoffs to himself _look at me now, gay as fuck! Oh Fuck, OH Fuck, Ooh FUCK!!!_ “I’m going to be sick!” Louis lurches for the bathroom and hangs over the toilet, emptying his stomach. There’s not much in there and the constant lurching, surges painful clenches through his body. Tears fall from his face and mix with the sweat on his pale skin.

“Shit, Lou.” Hannah holds back his fringe, while Louis starts shivering. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything, I’m sure he’s gone, he’s not coming after you.” 

“Why would he come after me?” Louis cries terrified.

“Shit, I don’t know.” Hannah feels panic rise up in her, and she hugs him from behind, hooking her ankles in his groin, pressing him towards herself. “I’m saying the wrong stuff right?”

“Yeah, Hannah. Leave.” Stan approaches the toilet, flushing, before crouching down next to Louis. Hannah looks at him with a dead expression. “Look, Lou, Hannah is talking utter shit as usual.” Stan ignores Hannah’s protest, “Troy is a prick, always been, so he’ll fuck off whence he came. Probably just wanted to see if ye mums new boy got money he can snatch.” Stan’s soothing hand on his forehead and Hannah clutch around his back is helping Louis soothe himself. “You’re a piece of work, Hannah.” Stan whispers. 

“Fuck off Stan.” 

“Come on Lou, lets get you back and get some food in ye.” Louis nods and lets himself be lifted by the other two before walking on two shaky legs to the sink. He washes his mouth and his face before looking at his pale face with red rimmed eyes. It reminds him of Zayn. How he looks at the end of the day.

Louis lies in bed, his stomach is still repelling from the clenching. Sallie had brought him a Yorkshire tea (he presumes that Mark told him it’s his favourite), and he had eaten some chips on his way home. Louis grabs his phone and stares at the messages from Liam. He decides to answer them in the morning and is about to turn it away, when an app shines yellow and purple at him. He opens instagram and finds all the notifications of followers, he finds the one he is looking for and is soon rewarded with astonishing amount of food pictures. Louis scrolls through Niall’s feed and finds a few pictures of footie, some of Barbara and a few with Harry. One or two with Louis, drunk at some party, and he sends a request to be tagged to them. He scrolls back to look for one with Harry, his tag read @hshq. With a lot of restraint, he stops himself from clicking on the little tag. Instead, he decides to watch Niall’s story, he was making pictures of food tagging @hshq as its creator. Louis might be a bit jealous of the delicious food, he remembers how well Harry can cook. He groans and locks the phone before turning on his side to close his eyes, dreaming of green-eyed boys, but also of a balled man that he has chosen not to see for a century.

Louis bounds down the stairs the next morning, and overhears Sallie and Mark talking about having more children together, which _ew_. “Hey kid, how’s the hangover?” Mark grins sympathetically. Louis does look like shit, his eyes are swollen like he hasn’t slept in days and his hair looks like a poodle.

“Want some tea?” Sallie beams when she sees him come in.

Louis gives her a wry smile, “can I talk to my dad for a moment.”

“Of course.” She tries to hold the smile when she quickly walks off. Louis takes her seat in front of Mark.

“You okay kiddo?”

“Hannah told me that my sperm donor was in town looking for me and mum.” Mark visibly swallows. “What he want?” Louis hopes that he doesn’t sound to hopeful. He definitely does not want anything to do with him, _nothing, ever._

“He was looking for yer mum.” Mark fiddles with his watch, “she neglected to tell him that she’d move.”

“He actually wanted her to tell him?” Louis’ voice goes a little higher.

“Alright, calm down.” Mark grabs his hand, “I told him she moved, that’s it. He left right after.”

“Didn’t he ask where to?”

“No, kid. You know why?” Mark is staring him dead in the eye. Louis shakes his head. “Because then he’d have to face her, and he’s a coward.”

“Maybe we have something in common then.” Louis whispers.

“What’s that mean?” Mark tightens his grip on him when Louis wants to pull away. 

“Nothing,” Louis whines when he can’t free his hand. “Just…” He breaks eye contact, “dad… I met someone.” He swallows hard. 

“That’s wonderful.” Mark says delighted, the crease in his brow disappearing.

“It’s a boy.” Louis stares at the thumb rubbing the back of his hand.

“You know I don’t have a problem with that.”

“Yeah, but I might.” Louis looks up to see the face of his father contort into surprise. “I’m not against it, but it might not be what I want! Might not be right for me.” Mark is blinking at him rapidly.

“I’m not very good at talks like this, did you talk to mum?” Mark stutters.

“No.” Louis retracts his hand from his fathers. 

“Right, well, don’t let love slip through your fingers because you are too proud!” Louis heads snaps over to him.

“Whats that supposed to mean? Too proud? When have I ever been too proud for something?” Louis stands up with such a force that the chair topples backwards. “This has nothing to do with pride! This is about me as a person!” Mark flinches, but silently waits for Louis to continue. Louis has always loved a challenge. 

“Your not understandingmy point son. You’d rather remain your popular image in school than be with the person that you have feelings for.”

“What the fuck do you know about it?” Louis’ voice wheezes from trying to draw in slow, steady breaths. 

“I don’t…”

“NOTHING. You know nothing!” Louis teeth are grinding against each other. “You don’t know what it’s like to question everything that you are.”

“I was a kid once too.” Mark tries to keep his voice even, but Louis screams over him.

“NOTHING!” Louis slams the door on his way out. 

💚🍑💙

After his fight with Mark, Louis drove to his grandparents with whom he had to go through wedding planning ideas and Skype his family in Cheshire. His mum was clearly relieved to see his face and the twins stumbled over their words while trying to tell a story that happened on their last day of school. Louis feels a little bad that he hadn’t been there to see them on their last day. He’s usually the one that gets to pick them up. He misses them, a lot. The bubbly energy is intoxicating, and Fizzy’s wickedness is thrilling. Louis would love to be there to have an eye on Lottie and her new budding romance with that Tommy guy. But he can’t go back. They’d be going to Ibiza in a few days and there is no sense in going home.

The flight leaves on a drowsy Thursday morning. Since the flight is one of the first to leave the barn, atfive in the morning, Louis and his friends have the great idea to go party the night before and not sleep. This is a great idea in theory, but just ask any flight attendant it’s a pain in the ass. Louis got so drunk, a gay club just had to many intoxicating possibilities, his friends threw him into the back of the car. According to witnesses, mainly Stan, Louis was murmuring filthy things in the back of his Bertie. Dressed with Burger King crown, Louis tumbles through security, _where did my baggage go?_ The police officer gives him a weird look, but Louis brushes his hoodie over his hair (which hurts a little because the crown shifts uncomfortably beneath it) and smiles at him dopey. Luke and Stan help him find his carry-on bag and walk over to the duty free. Luke grabs a Tom Ford perfume “huh tobacco and vanilla, fit don’t it?” He makes Louis twirl and sprays him from top to bottom. Louis tries to make a mental note of the smell, it really fits him. The tally lady gives them disapproving looks. 

Oli trips over a bag of cigarettes when they walk towards their gate. “Whoops. Wait, wait, Lewis,” he holds his cigarettes up, “don’t need some?” Luke takes the package out of his hands and drops it to the floor. He makes an I’m-so-sorry look to the tally lady, whose hand is already on the phone. Luke seems to ensnare her, and she gives a blushing smile when her hand moves away from the phone.

“Phew,” he whistles. “Let’s get the fuck going.” Luke and Stan box the other in the right direction. When they walk up to the flight attendant, Luke whispers, “Straighten up boys, don’t want to get kicked out.” Louis gives his best smile. “And Lewis, don’t fucking talk!” 

“Do you mind calling me Louis again?” Louis sticks his lower lip out, pouting.

“Jesus, you got to be kidding me.” Stan moans next to them. 

“Welcome aboard.” A curly-haired flight attendant says to them. 

They have to wait for the line to go on, so Louis peek’s another look at the attractive woman. “Thank you, beautiful.” Louis says and winks at her. The woman freezes and gives him a quizzical look. 

“He alright?”

“Perfect, darling.” Louis drawls on. 

“Told you to shut it.” Luke whispers pleadingly.

“You know,” Louis continues without a care for Luke’s words. “You remind me of someone back home. It’s the curls you know.” She gives him a short smile, before greeting the next person. When they find their seats, Louis can see how the curly-haired flight attendant tells the purser about them, but Louis crosses his arms and closes his eyes. Finally, he drifts into sleep. The fact that they immediately fell asleep and didn’t wake up again until thirty minutes before landing, is the only reason that the flight crew decided not to kick them off the plane.

After waiting for Zayn for forty minutes in the sweating hot parking lot, Louis finally sees a car park in front of them. It enlists multiple honking from other cars, who want to pass by, but Zayn motions for them to get in. “Parking is a nightmare.” Zayn excuses his behaviour once he got introduced to Oli, Stan and Luke.

“Oh please, you were cleaning your dong bong.” Louis grins at him and Zayn grabs his shoulder to crush him in a hug.

“Good to see ye too, Tommo.” After a 23-minute drive in-land to get to the west side of the island, where the house of Zayn’s uncle is located, they are rewarded with the beautiful view of Porto de St. Antonio. Zayn manoeuvres through the thick traffic to pass on, they travel on the south-west road, until they reach a beautiful large brick-built house. The driveway is a large round surface, where Zayn parks right in front of the red door. “Let me show you around first.” Zayn says before opening the car door. A footstep below the small open entrance way, there is a large baronial living room with white furniture, and to it’s left on a raised level there is an ensuite kitchen hiding behind an alcove. The open-plan living room opens to a waterfront-view from the top of the mountain, accentuated by the patio that looks out on it. 

Zayn steps left to a dark hallway, he points to the right of the hallway “that’s where the garage is, don’t use it much, I just park in the entry.” He shrugs with a smirk. “If you follow me, we can get you to your rooms and into the showers, you rank.” They pass by the narrow dining table and continue into the small hallway. He opens one door to the right, “this is the master, so mine. ” He grins when the boys peek into it.” A long spacious room with a king-size bed and an ensuite bathroom.

“You got a bathtub in your room?” Stan gurgles a laugh.

“Yeah, its fun…you can look right out onto the pool.” Zayn’s bathtub had a view on his small balcony which overlooked the large pool.

“Fancy.” Louis grunted, readjusting his crown. Yes, he was still wearing his crown proudly. 

“This is your room.” He points at no one in particular. The room right across from Zayn is a snug room, a small dresser stands to separate the two single beds pushed to the sides. The wall where the headboards were leaning against was pink. “Brov? Pink?”

“Oh right, sorry.” Zayn snickered. “My sisters used to sleep in here.” Stan and Louis snicker into their hands. 

“Oli, Luke this is you.” Stan and Louis quickly say and bound up the stairs. The room above Zayn’s turns out to be picked for Louis, and he enters it carefully. It’s not quite as large as the one of Zayn’s, but it had a round timbered ceiling, with a high hanging chandelier. His wooden bed was pushed against the left side wall looking out into the room. A closet to the left, but no bathroom or terrace. But a nice view.

The last bedroom, above the children’s room, also has a high timbered ceiling. The wooden bed stands right across from the door. On the right wall there is a desk with writing utensils, on the left a dresser with an ensuite bathroom. A narrow French door opens out to a foot wide terrace with an ornamental railing. It is just made for smoking. “No offence mate,” Louis turns to Zayn. “I’d rather be in this one.” 

Stan looks surprised “really, the other one has a better view and is much brighter, mate.”

“I like the dark and dingy, plus there’s a table and this small smoking spot and the ensuite.” Louis taps him on the back and pushes past the two men to go back downstairs and get his baggage.

After a good shower and propping open his suitcase in a corner, Louis won’t unpack just yet, he puts his knee long swimming trunks on. He pats his tummy, staring at himself in the mirror of the cramped sand-coloured bathroom, he wonders what’s to like about his tummy. It’s his biggest flaw that he seems to be unable to get rid of, it plumes over the waistband, and he brushes a hand over it. “Looks like I’m two months pregnant.” He whispers and scoffs at himself, to be honest his mother never looked pregnant at two months, but it’s the thought that counts.

He grabs a beer from the fridge and walks out on the patio. He sees the other boys already lounging in the pool. Louis walks the small stairs down and onto the tiny four-step path to the pool. He plumbers his bum onto one of the lounge chairs. “Good day fine people.”

“You look much better Tommo!” Zayn laughs from the edge of the pool, where he is sketching the view of the house.

“I thought you said still-life is boring.” 

“It is.” Zayn claims, “but I need a bigger range for my portfolio if I want to apply to art school in Milan next year.” 

“You want to go to Milan?”

“Well, it’s an option. Yeah.” Zayn looks up to Louis. “Haven’t you thought about what you want to do?”

“Football isn’t an answer” Oli grins knowingly.

Louis looks down at his white thighs. _I don’t know where I’ll be in a month, where he will be in a month. Will we be together, is this question something we need to decide together? Lie in bed on our stomachs going through options where we could go together? Promise that I’d stay truthful to him until he can come too? Wait a year for him? Love him? Or will I be with Eleanor? Lying on my bed, fighting over which universities to go to? What bachelor to pick? Will she throw my phone at my forehead, because I got another text from a green-eyed boy? Will he still talk to me when I don’t choose him? Will he let me kiss him? Of course not, don’t be daft, once that door closes it’s closed. I don’t want that door closed, how will I survive with knowing how addictive he is, how much I think about him when I’m with someone else? His eyes…his dimples…those lips…_

_“_ Brov?” Oli hits his face with a blow-up ball.

“I don’t know.” Louis retorts, kicking the ball at him. “Maybe something with writing or so. Me mum says I’m good at writing.” The boys burst into laughter. 

“Yeah alright then.” Oli grabs the ball and turns away from him to start a round of volleyball.

“Bugger off.” Louis meekly says. He grabs his phone and opens instagram. @Irishfoodking uploaded a few stories that he quickly clicks through, there was a party, where Barbara danced filthy. In one of them he can identify Harry grinding against her, his hand outstretched steadying him in the air. He looks god-damn gorgeous. Louis quickly goes on the internet, and types in ‘how to save instagram stories.’ There is a tab to a website, where he quickly types Niall’s instagram name in, luckily he has an open account, so the stories are easy to download. He clicks on the last one with Harry, and sees the tiny wheel scroll. 

“Catch.” Zayn calls. Louis drops his phone in between his legs and holds sunscreen in his hands. “You’re going to be so red, you’re white like paper!” Louis muffles some insults under his breath when he gets to work rubbing it all over his thighs.

💚🍑💙

The girl giggles into his neck, “you’re really hot.” Louis grins back, Zayn’s weed finally taking a hold of his mind.

“Thanks, love.” She has dark skin and beautiful thick lips with hauntingly dark eyes, everything _he_ is not.

“Nahaah” she has the most ridiculous laugh. “Yu accents shh-o cute.”

“Yours is cute.” Louis lamely retorts and kisses the german-accented girl, she laces her mouth open and their tongues meet in the middle. She tastes like the gin and tonic that she was drinking and Louis moans slightly. He hears Zayn cough, and he opens one eye to see him watching Louis through the rearview mirror. Zayn speeds up and shakes his head. _Right, I didn’t tell him about my break with Eleanor. He thinks I’m cheating. T_ he girl on top of him wiggles her bum in his lap. He can feel himself grind up, he’s been half hard since they left the beach bar.

The premisses for tonight was that they’d save the clubs for the next days and start easy with a beach bar. Yet here they are in Zayn’s car, with a girl grinding down on Louis and a boy folded into Oli’s legroom. “Hmmm…” Louis moans when she brings her hands to his fly. Her hand disappears in his pants and Louis moans into her mouth. “Babe… I’m about to come.” He warns her.

“Come? Wat das kaam mean?” The girl asks in confusion, but does not stop her manipulation on his cock.

“Ah shit” Louis moans “this.” He lets his head fall backwards and presses his lips tightly together to stifle the moan. 

“Oh..haahah..” She says in recognition. Louis turns his face and is met with Luke. Luke grins at him and gives him an openmouthed kiss. “Oh waw. Alwayz s-aught s-hat english boyz prude, ja?” Stan laughs harshly in the front and Zayn gives him a weird look. “Yu want to join, ja?”

“No, thanks, doll…” Luke hoarsely replies and points towards the boy in Oli’s legroom. “That’s mine for tonight.” Another harsh laughter rips from her lips. And she shrugs, taking her hand out of his pants and wipes the come on his jeans. _So Zayn is still staring at me, but whatever. Just came in the back of his car, whoops. Also kissed Luke again, maybe I should stop doing that, why, though? Like there is so much other people to kiss. Why does Luke look so much like Zayn? Oh, maybe that’s why he’s staring at me weird, I kissed a boy … and I liked it…haha… sing a long people. Who am I talking to? There’s always an audience, even if there isn’t one just make one in your head. I really need to see my therapist. Mum made me see one when I was a child, but he didn’t find anything. Haha, look at me now, bitch. God, I’m rebelling, right?_

“Yu ok my little pengu-in?” The girl pokes his nose.

“Penguin?”

“Ja…yu are dress in black, ja? And all white on s-e inside.” She makes a weird fletching sound with her teeth which is supposed to be hot, apparently. “And so cute and smoll.”

“I could take offence to that.” Louis slits his eyes. _Small, pff…_

“Naw…” the dark skinned beauty coos. “So english, huh?” All boys turn to her, but Louis sees something flash in the window. 

“Wait. Zayn stop!” Zayn goes in the brakes. 

“Park the car.”

“Oh Tommo, we ain’t got time for excursions.” He’s referring to his weed intake, after a specific amount and time, even Zayn’s metabolism won’t be able to withstand the high, and he won’t be able to drive the intoxicated others.

“Come on, live a little.” Louis snickers, the edges of his eyes creasing. He hates them, this high-happiness always makes him look like a toddler excited for a Barbie or something. Nonetheless, the team run out of the car. Louis ignores the cross walk and runs across the street with his girl on his hand. She is laughing furiously, _I wonder how many Gin and Tonics she has had._

“Tattoo studio?” Stan asks unbelieving, “Lewis, don’t tell me that you’re actually thinking about this?”

“Aren’t you wholly against this?” Luke asks confused.

“I might have wavered.” Louis grins and walks inside. 

“Can I help you?” A man with a round face and a matching chunky body asks them.

“Hi,” Louis cheers. “I want a tattoo.” 

“Alright, my name is Erik, do you know what and where?” 

“Hi Erik,” Louis grins. “On me Bum!” The other boys groan loudly.

“You sure that you want to have a stamp on that beautiful thing?” Luke asks, staring blatantly at Louis gorgeous behind.

“YES!” He smiles, clapping his hands together. 

“You know what?” Erik asks.

Louis rummages through his loud mind, he hadn’t actually come to think about that, he says the first thing that comes to mind, “a penguin!” He thinks for a second, while everyone is staring at him shocked. “With headphones!” Erik stifles a laugh.

The skin doesn’t hurt, but it itches a bit. Good thing was that he had fallen into bed with a girl tonight. His bum was off limits the entire time, much to her dismay. She had some very weird ideas when it came to his bum. Louis gets out of bed and brushes the light curtains aside and takes a seat at the French doors. He lights a cigarette and looks at the beauty in his bed. To be fair he had no idea how he was able to pull this bird. She was drop dead gorgeous, her skin was glistering in the moonlight like liquid chocolate and her hair fell across her back like a curtain. Maybe her beauty allowed him to at least preform well during the whole ordeal.  In the words of a closeted blogger he had found during his research: ‘a wet hole is still a wet hole’.  He blows the smoke outside, watching it curl past the ornaments of the railing. 

An impulse makes him cut short his smoke, he quickly gets back up and sits down at the desk. With a sharp intake he grabs a pen and paper.

He folds the piece of paper carefully together and puts it into his nightstand, before climbing back in bed. Louis closes his eyes with the solum vow to post the letter the next day. Satisfied with his progress, he drifts to sleep.

The next morning Louis wakes up alone. The other side of the bed is awfully cold. _There is nothing worse than waking up alone_. He remembers Harry’s warm body and the tickle of his curls. _That boy is a furnace_. Louis hurries to the shower to get the goo off of him, and jumps out again with a scream. _The tattoo_. It can’t get wet, which is why, Louis has to crane his neck to wash his hair over the sink and his body with a wet cloth. He curses himself when he sees the penguin on his bum. Deep down he hopes it’s not too big of a turn-off.

He walks downstairs to get a bowl of cereal and a tea. “Your bird already left, mate.” Zayn says from the dining table.

“Right.” Louis takes a tentative sip and burns his tongue a little. Too proud to admit his pain he swallows any squeal he was going to make. He sits down with Zayn, who is munching on a chocolate croissant. “Have any more of those?” Louis asks after looking at the delicious thing and then at his own cereal. Zayn leans forward to pass him the bread basket.

After a moment of silence Louis takes a heart to clear some things up, “me and El are on a break.” 

Zayn watches him over his coffee, “what?”

“We are on a break and we’re allowed to sleep with people.” Louis clarifies before stuffing a bit of croissant into his mouth. He rolls his eyes when he notices that he took a bite from the wrong side and he is chewing without chocolate in his mouth.

“What kind of a fucked up shit is that?” Zayn asks.

“Well, we both wanted to be free for the summer,” Louis lies. “But want to get back together when I get back.” 

“Perrie would kill me.” Zayn notes thoughtfully.

“Yeah, well, you guys are different.” Louis argues on the other side of the table, finally moaning because he found the chocolate.

💚🍑💙

A few days later, Louis and the boys are punctual (for once), waiting in the car park of the airport. Louis gets out to walk into the waiting area, he sees a mailbox, the letter burning a hole into his pocket. He gets his phone out to check instagram. His last post was a selfie, he had smiled into the camera while Erik was tattooing his bum. Fittingly enough, Luke had also taken a story, in which is bum was gloriously exposed. Louis knew for a fact that Luke had saved a few of those snapshots. Harry and Louis were following each other now, and it didn’t help his stalking, as Hannah had put it. Similarly to Louis, Harry didn’t post stories and only the occasional picture. There is a picture of Harry holding up bread in the bakery, there is a couples picture with Taylor from the disco, there are some of his tattoos and lots and lots of pictures of still-life in black and white. He’s a good photographer. The last picture is with his sister, he has a big hat on his head and a black tux with white t-shirt. ‘Congrats old girl’. Louis comments his own form of congratulations to her graduation, out of the spur of the moment and boredom. _I hate waiting._

“Louis?” 

“Aye, mate!” Louis spreads his arms and lets Liam tug himself into his side. They pat each others backs for a moment. “Good to see ye. ”

“Yeah, same.” One more tight squeeze later, they walk over to the car, and push Liam’s bag into the trunk. “Ye’re here for like a week, mate. Such a diva.” Louis comments on the size of Liam’s bag. Liam fondly grins at him. They squeeze into the car, with Louis sitting on Luke’s lap and Liam in the passenger seat. Zayn and Liam hug over the console, and Louis might see a small kiss from Zayn to Liam’s cheek. Might have been there, might not have been there.

They drive for a few minutes with everyone making acquaintances. Zayn stops the car in the gravel parking in front of a beach. “I thought the house is in the mountains?” Liam wonders out loud.

“Yeah it is.” Zayn agrees, “we thought we’d go to the beach first and go clubbing before we bring you home.” Liam looks surprised, but doesn’t protest.

“Ye ain’t forgotten your trunks, right? That diva pack got some?” Louis taunts with a smirk.

“I don’t forget things.” Liam pouts and gets out of the car. He rummages through his bag for a while until he finds his trunks. They move to a less crowded area, where they spread out six blankets. The boys don’t lose much time to run into the water with a football, intent on playing water volleyball. Louis watches Liam comically change his pants for his trunks wrapped in a towel.

“Everything sorted mate? Thought ye were going to tumble down like a fruit roll.” The boys snicker.

“You got to ask yourself, did you enjoy that?” Liam sways his hips dramatically when his toes touch the water.

“I quite like it, yeah.” Zayn grins at him. Liam throws him a wink. 

“Alright, lads, Cheshire vs Donny. Louis, sorry mate, yer Cheshire now.” Louis groans, but doesn’t complain. He has a feeling it could hurt Liam’s feelings if he complained to loudly. Neither of them win, since they don’t have a regular pitch, and the lines are to blurred. Louis rather counts the success of how many dunks he manages. Drenched they lie on their beach towels to tan. Liam has fallen asleep after a while and the other boys are in a heavy discussion about Doncaster Rovers, when Louis turns to Zayn. 

He looks beautiful on his back, with his caramel skin shimmering from the sunscreen. “So you and Liam are close again?”

The black hair lifts to stare at Louis, who is lying near his feet. “Yup, we’re doing good. Spent some time together when you bolted out of town.” He props himself up on his elbows, “why did you disappear so sudden?” _Thats my chance, I could tell him everything right now. The way he watched Harry and me at Eleanors party after the Tornados game, he could know something already. But Liam would never tell him._ Louis, eyes dot to Liam, who has draped an arm over his eyes. _I blindly trust that lad,_ his eyes go back to the raven-haired boy. _Him not so much_. 

“Just wanted to get home, see me dad.” Louis traces the loops on his towel.

“Your real dad or the step-father.”

Louis shivers from the thought. “Me step-dad. He’s my dad really.” Deciding to trust him with this information, he says “me real dad came around town, looking for me mum.” Zayn sits up and hugs his knees. “Don’t know what for, maybe snag Dan’s money, or some-what.”

“I thought your parents never married. He can’t go for spousal support right?”

“Yeah, guess not. Why else would he come looking after eight years?”

“Eight years?” Zayn lifts his sunglasses to look at Louis’ blue eyes.

“He’s a shit father, never payed child support and didn’t come around. He don’t give a flying fuck for me mum or me. Just fucked off.” Louis takes a sharp breath, he hadn’t realised how much the topic still hurts him. He had believed that he’d finally gotten over the fact that his father had left him behind, never bothering to get to know him, never bothering to take care of him like a father should. Leaving his mother to fend for herself with a newborn babe in her arm. “Eight years ago he promised to come to my 10th birthday, saying it was an important one.” Louis swallows the lump in his throat. “Me birthday is on Christmas, mate. Waited all day and all night for me dad… bastard never came.” 

“Sorry mate.” Zayn empathises. Louis shrugs and lays his head on his crossed arms. “You want to see him again?”

Louis contemplates before answering “No! Never.” 

Zayn nods “My dad might be gone for most of the time, but at least he shows up.”

“Congrats.” Louis says bitter, Zayn is already opening his mouth to say something, but Louis cuts him off. “No worries, I got me dad, Mark, got his last name too. And now I have Dan too.” He gives him a reassuring smile, trying to convince himself. Zayn bends over to grab a plastic bag, where he hides his weed. He wiggles it in the air suggestively and Louis agrees with a quirk of a smile.

Having changed in the car park and letting their hair dry from the sun into a natural beach-wave look, the six boys enter the prominent nightclub Amnesia. It looks like one huge warehouse with a floating stage for the DJ. “I’m so hyped, let’s get mortal!” Oli cheers when the club is already bouncing with bodies.

Getting some overpriced drinks from the cute bartender, they make their way into the club. The other boys are already bouncing on their feet in rhythm with the rest of the crowd, while Louis and Liam lean against one of the dirty pillars sipping on their drinks. Louis needs the lick of encouragement to dance.

“Zayn said your taking a break with Eleanor?” Liam says.

“Yeah, yeah. We are.” 

“Because of….” Liam trails off, blushing a little.

“Why are you awkward about this, that should be me job, lad!” Louis shakes his head with amusement. Liam’s cheeks heat up even more. “Seriously what’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing, Nothing, sorry.” Liam quickly takes a few gulps from his cocktail. Louis is watching him, _the fuck is going on with him? “_ So… you’re taking a break because of Harry?”

“Nah.” Louis locks eyes with the chocolate browns. “For me mate. Got to figure out what I want, yeah?” 

“Sounds about right.” 

“What does that mean?” Louis turns his body to fully look at Liam, and not at his friends dancing. 

“Does El know?”

“No.” Louis’ face changes again. “Found her snogging the stable boy.”

“Max?” 

“Yeah, can’t really blame her, though. Right? I kissed Harry plenty too.” Liam nods but avoids eye contact, Louis shifts to look at him better.“This why you’re so weird? You saw _him,_ didn’t you?”

“I’m not weird!” Liam deflects.

“Paynooo!” Louis scolds, “come on lad!” 

“I saw him, we go boxing together, alright? We’ve been boxing since January, since that party, we’ve become friends.” Liam shifts uncomfortably under Louis gaze. “Plus I’m your secret keeper!” 

“Secret Keeper?” Louis snickers, the alcohol finally kicking in.

“Apparently, it is a Harry Potter reference.” Liam grins, getting more comfortable under Louis softer smile.

“What?”

“Yeah, there’s this charm or hex-thing to keep a secret and there’s only person in the group that can reveal the secret or something. Anyway, that person is the secret keeper.” Liam points to himself.

Louis starts grinning with a closed mouth, making it look v-shaped. “That’s a Harry thing innit?” 

“Yeah…” Liam agrees taking another gulp of his cocktail.

“How is he then?” Louis asks and ignores the fluttering of his tummy.

‘Hopeful. Happy.” Liam watches Louis carefully, but Louis keeps his face unchanging.

“You coming, lads?” Stan beams at them. Louis puts down his glass and joins him in the huddle. Their jumping together to Jay-Z and Kanye West N**as in Paris, holding up their hands pumping their fists to the beat. He can see a lass grinding up against Oli, whose ears have taken the same ginger colour as his hair. Louis laughs against the ceiling, letting the lightness of the moment take over. Slowly he grabs a pack of cigarettes and places one in his mouth. Zayn comes up to him and ignites a sparkler. It enlists some cheers from people around them. Louis lifts his lip towards it and lets the cigarette smoke enter his lungs. He breathes in and sways to the new beat, letting Luke’s arms surround them and surround him in a small drawl. He can feel something shift against his bum, and he smiles against the feeling. 

“New round?” Stan calls over their heads. Zayn and Stan move over to the bar to get everyone a new round of beers. Luke starts taking pictures of Oli and his girl, who are actively snogging by now. As soon as their drinks arrive, Luke starts taking a video of them dancing, Louis playfully punches his fist into his jaw. Luke giggles and turns around to him, Louis smiles back fondly. Luke pushes his phone into his pants and grabs Louis neck to kiss him impromptus on the mouth. Louis lets the familiar drag of Luke’s lips on his happen, he drags away from him in favour of drinking his beer.

The girl giggles in Oli’s lap and Louis can see Liam roll his eyes at her. “I’m guessing you’re not getting a free pass from Danielle.” Louis laughs into Liam’s ear, the hot exhalation drifting over Liam’s shoulder into his ear, making the boy jerk with a shiver. Louis gives an irritable laugh. Another breath fans over Liam’s shoulder and Louis has to stifle a moan. Luke’s hand rubbing him roughly over his jeans.

“Don’t want one, mate.” Liam says over his shoulder. Louis snorts through his nose and falls back against his seat. Who wouldn’t want a free pass? He looks down at Luke, who is folded into his legroom. Louis caresses the side of his face, again hit by how much he looks like Zayn. He looks at Zayn in the driver’s seat who quickly averts his eyes from Louis. Zayn is still coming to terms with Louis’ experimenting with Luke. Though, he hasn’t said anything yet. 

“Where’s he going to sleep?” Stan points towards Liam.

“Ehm…” Zayn shifts in his seat, “with me. Got the biggest bed.” The boys all affirm the conformation with hums, with the odd slippery sound coming for Oli’s lips. Louis closes his eyes again, to enjoy the pressure on his cock. 

They stop in front of the front door again and tumble out of the car. “Shot gun room!” Oli screams and runs into his and Luke’s room with the girl on his heels.

“This way Li.” Zayn grins at Liam, who is stumbling into the house with his diva suitcase. Zayn gives him a tentative smile and leads him to the master. Liam’s face goes o, when he walks into the room. 

“This is beautiful, Z.” He turns around to the other boys, awe faced.

“Come on,” Louis grabs Luke’s hand, and gives Liam a goodnight nod. But Liam is busy checking out the large ensuite bathroom, excited like a toddler. 

Louis pushes Luke into the room and closes the door on Stan’s grin. When he turns around Luke is already falling to his knees in front of him. With a quick notion he rips his pants and boxers down, taking Louis half hard cock into his hand, he feeds it into his mouth. Louis groans from the wet heat around him. Unlike Harry, Luke can deep throat quite well. “You want me to come like this?” Louis moans. 

Luke pops off of his hard cock. Hoarsely he says “can you fuck me?” 

“Yes.” Louis grins. “Don’t have lube, though.”

“Give me a minute.” Luke disappears and Louis steps out of clothes and carefully places the letter back in his night stand. Again a day goes by where he hasn’t posted it. Luke comes back with a tube in his hands. He waves it in front of Louis. 

“Undress.” Louis tells him, when he gabs the lube and carefully applies some to his fingers. Nervously he says “Can I finger you this time?”

Luke grins at him, “you on a learning curve or something?” 

“I don’t have to.” Louis flatly says. 

“Are we learning this for someone special?” Luke asks when he sits down next to Louis on the bed. 

“Not really, just don’t want to make an ass of myself.”

“Well, get to it.”

“You’re clean right?” Luke scoffs. Louis coats his middle finger with lube and slowly pushes in. He wiggles his fingers a bit, causing Luke to become a moaning mess. Once he’s played around enough he uses more lube to put in his index finger. Luke moans. “Painful?”

“No it’s alright. Keep going.” Louis is a little less hectic this time. “You have to scissor them o-o-open.” Louis nods in concentration and tries to pry his fingers apart from each other slowly. He angles his fingers and hits Luke’s prostate. “Fuck!” Luke groans. 

“Third finger?” Louis asks eager.

“Mhm.” Luke is mumbling now and Louis is thriving on the power that he has. He lubes up his last finger and adds it to Luke’s hole. Hitting Luke’s prostate repeatedly, he finally comes. Louis is grinning from the achievement. Another thing he has learned. Louis lies down next to him and waits for Luke to become coherent again. He touches his cock, watching Luke’s blissed out state and remembers Harry’s little aftershocks, different to the pliant mess next to him. He comes with a little moan, spraying Luke’s right thigh with his cum. Luke gets up to clean both of them up and Louis waits until Luke falls asleep. He gets up and approaches his dresser again.

💚🍑💙

The next morning, Louis untangles himself from Luke. He truly hates being the little spoon. _Another_ + _for Harry, but who is counting._ He showers and cleans himself diligently, before he goes looking for Liam. _Maybe I need to talk to him, figure all this out, that’s what I was supposed to be doing here anyway._ With a little rasp against the master bedroom door, he gets no answer so Louis being a little shit simply walks in. There’s no one here, but the shower is running. He’s about to go back, when he sees Zayn’s notebook. He quietly tip toes over to it and takes a peek. There are a ton of scotches from the house and the beach and the pine trees. Damn those pine trees and their green-ess. There is one of Liam, _when did he have time to draw that yesterday?_ There is one of Louis’ back looking out at the scenery from the patio. He quickly bustles through them, when he finds what he was looking for. _Was I looking for this?_ It’s the sketch of Harry, when he was so down in the Choir room. It’s captivating, _he’s looking into my soul_. “You could take it with you.” Liam says from the doorway of the bathroom. 

“What?” Louis asks. He lets the journal drop back close. 

“Zayn has drawn Harry too many times to put it into his portfolio, he’ll never notice that it’s gone.” Liam walks past him, dressed only in a towel. 

“Don’t know what you are on about.” Louis retorts, avoiding his eyes so that he can’t look at Liam’s naked torso. Liam doesn’t tell him exactly what he was talking about, because Zayn bursts through the door with breakfast in his hands. 

“Oh, morning Louis!” 

“Morning.” Louis says while he eyes the breakfast.

“You coming with us? Your friends already said they’re staying by the pool. Completely knackered they are. One of ‘em can’t even sit properly.” Louis smirks thinking about Luke wiggling on the sun bed.

“Sure?” Louis says. “What are we doing?” 

“Painting.” Zayn says with a smirk of his own.

“Alright, let’s get going.” Zayn hoists a bag over his shoulder and trudges of. Louis closes the boot and looks at the wall that Zayn had picked out.

“Alright, just for me sense of mind, boys, how legal is this?”

“Not at all.” Liam says while he is leaning into Zayn’s side. 

Zayn grins when he throws Louis the keys, “you’re our get-away-driver.”

“Bloody hell.” Louis whispers, regretting agreeing to this. Liam laughs while he is helping Zayn fasten a bandana behind his head. “Christ, we need mouth protection?” Louis squeals.Zayn simply opens his bag of paints and Liam gives him a one eyed glare. With a thoughtful expression Zayn shakes the spray paint container in his right hand. Louis panicky looks around, while Liam grabs a jump rope and his body suddenly starts jumping up and down. 

Louis moans painfully. “You didn’t have to come mate.” Zayn says behind his bandana. 

“Shut up.” Louis weakly says. He falls to his bum, “do you have paper and pen?”

“Why?”

“Want to write.” 

“You a writer, Tommo?” Liam mocks.

“Yeah I am actually.” Louis retorts. “Better writer than your jumping mate.”

“Hey,” Liam pouts. “I’m a great jumper.”

“Danielle say that too?” Louis grins. 

“Shut up, would you lads?” Zayn grabs his journal and throws it towards Louis. A pencil falls out of it. “Write in that, but rip the page out first, don’t want any of me drawings to rip.” 

“Yeah, yeah, that’ll work.” He rips a few pages out and balances the journal on his knee to use it as his table. _What do I write?_

Harry,

Why can’t I hate you?

He doesn’t date the letter, he doesn’t sign it. It took him forever to write something down. And now he can’t help but stare at it, without adding more to it. When he entered that kitchen in January, he had been intent on ignoring the lanky boy, had been sure that even if their hook up was amazing, that he deserved more. But the more he knew about him, the more he wanted him. The more he got from his lips, was it for the laughter, the kisses or the slow drawl of his words, the more he wanted to hear it again. E _very time I look at him, I feel like I’m missing out. And then there is Eleanor. Do I keep pretending that I love Eleanor? Because I don’t, I know that now. She’s not the one on my mind when I dance in the crowd of a night-club, she doesn’t exist in my daydreams, she’s not the one that whispers things into my ears at night. I hate that I can’t tell you this. Hate that I’m too weak to write it down, too weak to post even a simple letter._ The world would be less cruel if he could have hated him. Hated the sight of him the moment he saw him again. Wouldn’t life be easier if he hadn’t gone weak in the knees when his fingers waved at him with the grease of the food he was preparing for him? Life would have been nicer to him if he hadn’t started dating Eleanor out of convenience, but love. _I just feel sad, lonely and bad at maths!_

“I think he’s my favourite, the pink guy, he turned out sick.” Liam stopped jumping and is inspecting Zayn’s wall. 

“What’s happened to the wall?” Louis straightens to turn his head towards the wall, he’s impressed. “Have you drawn a picture of me?” Louis folds the paper quickly and puts it in his back pocket.

“No I don’t like you.” Zayn deadpans. “Just like drawing cartoons mate.”

“Looks like he got a dent there.” Liam motions to something on his pink guy.

“I did some Bob Marley inspired thing… just because he’s cool, is all.” Zayn grins.

“That looks sick.” Louis agrees.

“Thanks for that.” Zayn says without any enthusiasm. “Let’s give it some green, my favourite colour.” Louis stands up and places the journal back into Zayn’s bag. 

“Qué le estás haciendo a mi pared?” A man with a big belly is screaming at them. 

“I think that means we got to go.” Liam says, grabbing Zayn’s arm, who was finishing his personal signature under the paint. “Come on Zayn.” Louis scrambled to his feet. The man was running towards them now, his big belly jumping up and down, exposing his stomach like a crop top t-shirt. 

Louis starts running for the car, getting in the driver’s seat and start the old thing. Zayn and Liam quickly topped into the backseat, Zayn’s sitting on Liam’s lap when he tries to slam the door shut. “Hijos de, regresen. Escoria.” The man shouts when he almost reaches them.

“Tommo, drive!” Louis steps down on the pedal and drives off.

“Always knew crop tops were the worst fashion trend.” Louis says out of breath when he sees the man stop in the rearview mirror. The boys in the back start laughing hysterically, relieved. 

After a dinner created by Liam and Oli, Louis comes back to his room, ready to fall into bed. The day was exhausting and his mind is still tumbling words and emotions in his brain like a washing machine, on repetition. Louis stops in his tracks when he sees that someone had placed something on his duvet, he finds the drawing of Harry. With delicate hands he picks it up and studies it, his heart beating at an abnormal amount of speed. “Thanks Liam.” He whispers and carefully places it on his night stand so that he can look at it as he cradles one of the pillows in his arms to fall asleep.

💚🍑💙

This is the night it all came down to. The last night for the boys from Doncaster. Against Zayn’s better judgement and Liam’s terrified questioning (insert daddy jokes), Louis and the boys had gotten kegs of beer, chips and hard liquor. They pass around flyers for their party that they named ‘Twat’, in their neighbourhood and some to cute boys and girls in a small Ibizan town square. Sooner than later the house was buzzing with people, laughing, dancing and puking. There was a contest in the living room and skinny dipping in the pool. The music was blasting outside, and Louis was dancing in a huddle of his friends with naked feet on the grass.

He had almost had a heart attack, when he had seen the boy. Tall with brown curls bouncing on top of his head. For a short happy moment he had thought Harry was here. Louis had seen from Gemma’s account that the family was in Spain, playing volleyball. But that wasn’t Ibiza, and when the boy had turned around he had thin lips and a pudgy chin. He really admired Harry’s sharp bone structure. It was defiantly not him.

His fringe is drenched and hanging like a rag from his forehead. The oversized muscle shirt exposes most of his skin, and his skinny-jeans have become a second skin to him. After kicking out a couple that was fucking in his bathroom, the curly-haired boy had pushed him against the door, hands on his bum. Tongue tasting sour, Louis is enjoying their cocks rubbing against each other. _But I won’t be a bitch to Harry, I will dominate him._

“Who’s Harry?” The boy moans into his neck.

“What?” Like a Popsicle getting frozen to the side of the freezer, Louis stops against the door.

“You said Harry.” The boy comes into his vision.

“Sorry.” Louis gets out. 

“Who is he?” The boy’s hand rub over Louis’ groin, teasingly slow. Louis presses his lips together, suffocating a moan. The boy continues, “someone left behind?” Louis doesn't react, just open his eyes again to stare at light brown hues. Louis grabs his hand to still the motion over his cock. 

“What’s your name?” Louis asks.

“Who do you want me to be?” Louis stares back at him.

He gulps, “Harry.” 

“Alright. I’m Harry,” the boys index finger travels up his middle toward his nipple, “what do you need me to do?”

“Get on your hands and knees on the bed, naked… wanna see your curls.” The boy smirks and does as told.

“What should I call you?” The boy asks when he finds his position.

Louis places his knees behind the boy, “Lou, just Lou.” Louis says, while letting his hand travel over the boy’s spine. 

“Oh Lou, please…” the boy begs with a soft whiney voice. “I’ve waited so long.” _God, that’s cheesy but effective._

Louis gulps when he pushes down his own boxers, “I know Curly, me too.” He bends forward to kiss his right cheek, then his breath travels across the boy bum, against his butt crack, to kiss the left cheek. “You look beautiful like this.” He delicately traces the boys bum with his hands. 

“Lou, want to see you too…”

“More than wanting to feel me?” Louis grins while his hand pry apart the cheeks.

“Oh I…” the boy stutters, just like Harry, slow and overwhelmed. Louis laughs against his skin, his breath tickling the boys rim. “That’s so unfair…” the boy whispers. 

“Well, if you’re good, maybe I’ll let you see me when I come, yeah?” The curls bounce in a nod. He tentatively bites the boy’s cheeks and sucks in his flesh. “That’s perfect.” He lets the boy know that he’s impersonating the real Harry perfectly. Louis grabs Luke’s lube and a condom, and wets his finger like Luke had taught him a few nights ago. He quickly works the boy open, while fake-Harry moans quiet encouraging ‘please Lou’ and ‘Lou more.’

“Please Lou, don’t let me wait any longer.” Louis chuckles before grabbing the condom and rolling it over his cock. Louis enters the boy and lavishes in the beautiful sounds he makes when Louis finally hits his spot. The boy coos. “Faster Lou, please.” 

Louis picks up his pace, getting closer to his own orgasm, when he watches the curls drop to the bed. Getting weak the boy’s torso falls onto the bed and changes the position. “You can touch yourself baby,” Louis says. The boy’s hands quickly come around to rub his own cock.

He flips fake-Harry, so that he’s looking at his leaking cock. It’s smaller than expected, maybe five inches but it’s fat.“Hands to the headboard, sweetheart and don’t move them.” Louis keeps fucking into him and clasps his lips around his nipple, remembering the way Harry thrashed under him when he did the same to him. Harry’s torso had four nipples adoring him. _four._

Louis’ head looks up and sees the blown brown eyes and the pudgy chin. He ignores the want in the boys eyes and bends down at an awkward angle to takes the tip of fake-Harry’s cock into his mouth, the boy moans loudly and comes into his mouth without warning. The boy moves his hips a couple of times in Louis’ groin, and Louis comes with a squeezed “Harry!” He falls on top of the boys torso and turns around, pulling out.

“Nice trick.” The boy gasps. 

Louis smiles “Never done that before.”

“Should remember it, was good.” The boy gives him a thumbs up, while his chest is still heaving. Louis stands up to tie his condom and throw it in the bathrooms bin. He wets a cloth and throws it on the boy’s stomach. He lies back down next to him to watch him clean up. “Your boy has submissive streak, huh?” The fake-Harry finally says after putting the cloth on the night stand.

“I don’t know.” Louis confesses, but the boy doesn’t push it any further, and Louis is quite happy about that. The boy gets dressed in record time, walks over to the desk and quickly jots something down. He gives Louis a small piece of paper. It has a number and an H on the end.

“If you ever need me again.” He winks and slips out of the room. Butt naked Louis leaves the drenched sheets and grabs a piece of paper and a pen. With a fag between his lips, he sits down by the open French door and lights it. A book beneath the paper, looking out at the pine trees and feeling the electric drum of the floorboards moving to the music, Louis starts writing.

Louis hadn’t realised that he was crying when he signed his name. _I don’t know what I want, do I know what I want. Please, someone tell me what I want. I can’t go through this. Not alone._ Louis crumbles re-reading his letter, _why are my letters more honest than I am with myself?_ He ignores the nagging thought that he signed with  love . Love of all things. But he’s a master of pushing aside things he doesn’t like to feel and goes to bed, shoving the letter into his night stand with all the others. He gets into a cold bed and falls asleep alone.

💚🍑💙

In the early morning, Louis gets woken by a ghost running through his room. Louis screams with all of his might. Butt naked he runs for it and uses a heavy encyclopaedia to bust the ghosts head in. Someone is screaming and its not Louis. “Liam? The fuck?” Louis screams at him. 

“What the hell did you do that for?” Liam pulls the sheet from his body and stares at Louis with a forming bump on his forehead.

“You scared the shit out of me, lad! The fuck we’re you thinking?” 

Liam chuckles slightly. “You scared of ghosts Louis?” 

“Fuck you too.” Louis drops the book on the floor with a loud thud. “I have to scare away ghosts from under me sisters beds since I was four.” Liam chuckles and holds his head painfully. 

“At least you didn’t use any of the empty bottles.” Liam says. Louis looks around, the house is a mess. Liam points towards him “nice cock by the way.” Louis looks down at his naked form and rolls his eyes before swaying past Liam. 

“Don’t get any ideas, Lili. Not interested.” 

“Oh believe me I know, need curls don’t I?” Louis gives him the middle finger when he smashes his bedroom door closed. 

“Perrie!” Oli runs forward and hugs the girl that he has never met before.

“Wow, Zayn, your bird is fit as fuck.” Stan complements.

Jade throws her hair behind her back, “I’m well lush thank you!” Louis snickers and takes her into an embrace. 

“Glad you came!” Louis says, while Zayn hugs Perrie, who gives him a kiss to the cheek.

“Wow, you kept it neat.” Jade’s eyes crosses over the living room and the part of the kitchen that she can see. 

“Thanks for noticing, lush-y!” Oli grins. “What’s your name, lass?”

“It’s Jade, and I ain’t you lass! He's giving is hackies.”

“The fuck she say?” Luke stares at her. 

“Sorry,” Perrie says while she steps forward to look around better. Hard to believe that she’s never been here after three years together with Zayn. “Usually we have Leigh-Anne here to translate.” 

“We’ll make do.” Louis laughs. “We had a party last night, whole neighbourhood was here… That’s why it looks like a crack house… I mean no one did crack, a ton of weed but no crack.”

Jade gives Zayn a pointed look. “So the boys are leaving today.” Zayn points at Oli, Stan and Luke. So Jade you can have Stan’s room, across from Louis. Perrie your obviously with me."

“Obviously.” Jade whispers as she picks up a used thong and frowns at it.

“Liam will move to Luke and Oli’s room for the last two days.”

“Already moved.” Liam grins. He waves at them, while he’s still holding the plastic bag in his right hand. He’s the only one that had bothered to clean up this morning. Three boys had been packing, Zayn and Louis had been smoking on the patio.

“Let me show you ye room, Jade.” Louis grabs her baggage to get out of clean-up duty.

“Such a gentleman, Lou.” She pinches his nose, and they walk towards her room. Stan’s baggage is already standing outside his room and there is a cleaning lady that is changing the sheets. She looks up unhappily from her job, when Louis places Jades bag near the dresser. “Thanks Louis.”

“Welcome.” He smiles at her. “I really am happy that you are here.”

“Me too.” She looks around the room, “any action happening then?”

“Tons.” Louis grins. Jade side-eyes him, so he explains for the zillionth time on this trip “on a break with El.” 

“Oh wow. Sorry.” Louis just shrugs.

Two hours later, Louis says goodbye to his childhood friends at the airport. He drives Perrie and Jade to a hippie market, where they buy flowers for the house. When they come home Zayn and Liam are swimming in the pool and the girls join them. Louis enjoys the quiet afternoon lounging and the dinner that they have in front of the telly. “Can’t believe we’re watching this shite.” Jade says around a mouth-full. 

“As someone who has swung both ways, I’m well aware of the joys of a Johnson and the lovingness of a lady garden.” The moderator introduces the show they are watching: Naked Attraction.

“This is quite a moment for us, in our friendship that we should remember.” Liam says, nudging Louis.Louis is reminded again that this is Liam’s first real friendship group.

“Could we please reveal the lower halves of the bodies.” The moderator announces.

“Lower Halves…” Louis says at the same time as Liam. “Lower Half…the music in it as well.” Liam smirks.

“Honestly.” Louis shakes his head next to Liam. 

“She is quite a petite girl,” the moderator is saying right away “with a massive growler.”

“Growler…you can’t be….honestly!” Louis says placing his hand thoughtfully against his chin.

“Growler.” Liam places his locked hands behind his head, and his biceps bulge. Zayn’s eyes trail to them both before he tugs Perrie into his side.

“Haven’t heard growler for years!” Jade giggles.

“What’s mad about this, is like…they can get turned away now. You know what I mean? They can get turned away now.” Louis says, after all the girls had showed off their lower halves.

“Yeah and you’re going to have a complex about your parts for the rest of your life.” Payne agrees.

“THAT…and…and” Louis trips over his words “that’s like all they have done. They’ve gone on TV, flashed their fanny and got out of there.” The boys laugh, and Jade puts her empty plate down.

“What do you think of your competition?” The moderator asks a girl with fat lips. “She’s got nice teeth.” The girl answers.

“She’s got nice teeth…I mean.” Liam looks off to the side. 

”Why are you keen on picking your date naked?” The moderator asks the nice teeth girl. The girl answers, “I need to see him first. Like me nilly is like a jam jar, so I got to see he fills it out or not.” Zayn falls off the couch laughing. 

“How's your nilly like a jam jar.” Perrie questions. 

“And that's why she prefers a big willy.” Louis nods along.

“She had bairns hasn’t she?” Jade says, using the Geordie slang for children.

“I have asked so many people, having kids don’t make your hutch wider.” Louis counters, having overheard his mother talk about this before.

“But everyone is different…” Jade softly says.

“Help me what she means with a jam jar.” Perrie is desperate now.

Jade places both hands together to make a hole “just wide.”

“Mine jam jar isn’t wide.” Perrie counters. 

“But she’s saying she had kids.” Louis argues.

“Not my jam jar.” Perrie points between her legs, “but my jam jar in the fridge.” Jade laughs toppling over, holding her glasses tight, so they don’t fall to the floor.

“But if you compare your jam jar to your nilly.” Jade finally says staring at her, tears still prominent in her eyes.

“OH RIGHT, Yes RIGHT. Why would you say jam jar?” Perrie finally caught on.

“That’s what it stretched to.” Louis buds in.

“After having babies?” Perrie covers her mouth with her hands looking petrified. Her eyes scream ‘I’ll never have babies.’

“Are you ready to see some Johnsons.” The moderator asks, causing everyone to turn from Perrie to the telly. 

“Here we go.” Liam chimes. The boy comes in and there is dingle music coming with it. Liam and Louis sing the song along, moving their heads from left to right multiple times “dilly dilly dilly dill.” Zayn laughs. 

“What do you like about him?” The moderator asks petit girl. “I like his hair.”

“I like your hair is not the compliment you want… stood in front of a bird naked, you do not want to hear I like your hair.” Liam argues, laughing into his fist. He turns to Louis “Would you go on?” 

“What…do you mean? Who goes on this?” Louis stares at him.

“People like you.” Liam snickers.

“You go on there to get naked to get a date…it’s just so nuts.” Louis muses, before they go quiet again.

Two days later, Louis sits on the patio looking at the scenery nursing his hangover on a Yorkshire tea. They had showed the girls the beach bar last night, and it had gotten slightly out of hand. At some point Jade had puked into the flower pot, at which point they had been thrown out. But they had made due by jumping into the water and swimming in nothing but underwear. Jade, who had not worn a bra, had gone topless. She had winked at him, and Louis had his final enlightenment, no interest at all, not from himself and not from his cock either.

Liam sits down next to Louis, “I was kind of hoping that you’d find me, but it’s my last day, so here I am.” Louis just hums. “Look, I’m your secret keeper, so if you need to talk to me than I am here for you.”

“Well, don’t let a lad hanging, go on then…” Liam is staring at him confused, “what _he_ say, you twat.”

“Just that he gave you some time to come to terms with it.” Louis swallows, _to come to terms with it._

“Come to terms with it?” Louis says to himself.

“Yeah, he thinks you’ll come back to him.”

“Back to him…” Louis continues talking to himself. “I was never his!”

“Louis?” Liam looks at him with the softest expression, _it’s annoying!_

“His expectations are way too high.” Louis screams towards the sky. “What he thinks I’ll come back on a white horse and tell the entire world that I love him? That I’m gay? Seriously? There is no way in Hell I can do that. Even if I choose him, I’m not proclaiming this to the entire town… He thinks that he’s that powerful?”

“Tommo, calm down.” Liam shifts closer towards him “He doesn’t expect any of that.” 

“You really think that Harry, out and proud gay boy, is going to be with a closeted one? You think he can handle that? Sneaking around, not holding hands. Cut out all the bullshit, Harry is forcing me out of the closet.” Louis exasperates. It’s the first time he had admitted to anyone, even to himself, that he was In the closet in the first place.

“Harry wants none of that alright? That just speaks for yourself, what you expect yourself to do. All Harry wants is that you can admit to yourself that you are gay or whatever you are. That you have feelings for him, that they are mutual. He wants a chance to be with you. That’s all! Because he’s heads over heels for you. And if you were brave, you’d admit to yours too. You’d admit you want him just as much.” Liam’s voice is stern. Honest and stern. Louis hides his face in his hands. “Louis when you came to me in Zayn’s shed you were…” Liam breaks off not sure how to word it right, before he continues “you were ashamed of it. But here.” Louis peeks through his fingers at him, Liam is lifting his hands to mean Ibiza. “You’ve been with girls, with boys, and you had no shits given what Zayn would say.” 

“I’m not ashamed.” Louis finally confesses. “I don’t want to lose footie, I don’t want to come to school and get pushed against the lockers, I don’t want to walk around town people watching and talking about me. I just want everyone to fuck off. Just not ready to give all that up.” 

“So you’d rather have your pride then be with the boy you love.” 

“Never said I love him, mate.” Louis grabs his tea again and takes a sip.

“Fuck you.” Liam says. “Fuck you and your pride.” 

“Not pride. Why’s everyone on about pride?” Louis swings the cup, the tea slushing over the brim.

“Because you’re not admitting to yourself that the only thing you do really want is _him_! And you’re not willing to compromise to have him. He’s not asking you to come out. You,” Liam pokes Louis chest, “can have him and everything else. Coming out that’s on your own time.” 

“I’ll hurt him, Li.” Louis whispers. 

“What?” Liam shifts to face Louis instead of the scenery.

“I screw everything up, Liam. I’m not good for him. He’s so pure and beautiful, I… I can’t do that to him. I will mess up eventually. He deserves more.” An image of his father flashes in front of his eyes, and another of his mother and all her failed relationships. She was the sweetest wholesome person in the world, and all her relationships have failed, how was he suppose to do better? _I’m still my father’s son!_

“Can’t you give him that choice?” Liam’s voice is soft, and Louis thinks that if he would touch him now, his hands would be gentle.

“He already made his choice and it’s the wrong one.”

“Louis,” Liam does grab his arm now, fragile like you’d touch a baby. “You can be with him. Because even if you screwed up a lot before, I know you’ll try to be a better person for Harry. You already proved that this past half year. You can make that choice, you can be good enough for Harry.” 

“Hey boys you alright?” Perrie sings when she joins them walking through the glass doors.

“Good. Good. Hey Perrie,” Liams still stern “could you give us a moment, kind of having a heart-to-heart.” 

“Oh sorry, sure.” Perrie quickly disappears to the pool.

“You sure he’s waiting for me?” Louis asks, stomach in knots. 

“FUCK YES!” Liam screams it towards the sky and laughs into his face. Louis lets out two airy chuckles. 

Hope sprinkles into his skin, _maybe I can be better for you._ “I still need time, Liam.”

“I know, I get it. I always be here if you need to talk. But some last advice…”

“I’m begging you let it be the last.” Liam chuckles.

“I think you need to write to him or something, let him know you’ve been thinking about this and not procrastinating.”Louis can feel his cheeks heating up, and he starts fiddling with his tea cup. “You already did?” Liam grins proudly like a father.

“No. Well yes.” Louis is stumbling over his words again, “I haven’t posted them.” 

“Okay.” Liam grins. “How about you do that then.” 

“I thought you were out of advice.” 

“Proud of you.” Liam hugs him from the side, squishing Louis side to his front.

“Fuck off.” Louis punches him against his chest. Liam falls backwards, but he’s laughing. Louis can see Perrie look at them curiously from the blue sun bed.

💚🍑💙

Liam leaves and with him Louis resolve. The letters burn holes into his jeans every day, but he does not send off a single one of them. His heart clenching every time he thinks to buy stamps that day. Fear of rejection settles in his gut, ridicules his mind and relentlessly tugs at his heart. On the second night out with the girls they go to a club called Eden. Louis laughs from the Adam and Eve reference, while a cute guy is whispering into his ears. Eden, a place for Adam to find his Adam more like. He loses the guy quickly, because the girls don’t know about him yet, and he wants to skip any awkward questions.

At night, he calls fake-Harry and smuggles him into the house. He fucks him into the sheets again while he moans ‘Lou’ repeatedly into the pillow. He doesn’t kick him out this time and falls asleep next to him. 

When he wakes up, he allows the boy to suck him off in the shower. They walk down the stairs silently, and Louis pushes him out of the front door. The boy gives him a short kiss to the cheek before the front door closes. Jade walks past him and gives him a weird look before beaming down the two steps to get to the kitchen. The other two are already in there too, so Louis joins them. “Made you tea.” Louis thanks Perrie before grabbing the hot cup. 

During mid-day, Louis finds Jade half drunk again cooking in the kitchen. “What you making?”

“Spaghetti with tomato sauce.” Jade grins over her shoulder.

“You sneak out the boy from last night?” Louis asks her. 

“Me?” She gives him a knowing look. “My guy left last night.” 

“Was he good?”

“Do you remember all the other times that we talked about my sex life?”

“No.”

“Exactly.” She grins and stirs her tomato sauce.

“Although,” Louis grins just as Perrie enters in a pink bikini with green poke-a-dots. “I did help you hook up with Jed.”

“Oh right. Thanks for that.” Jade says, sarcasm dripping from her tone. 

“What? He didn’t have big enough cock?”

“No. His cock was good. Manners not so much.” She grins at him, while she tries to manoeuvre the sauce over to the bowl. Her hands slip and the pan crashes to the floor. “Oh my god! Oh my god! I spilled tomato sauce. Look at the floor, its like lava!” 

“Shit!” Zayn squealed. “The floor is lava! The floor is lava!” 

Let the game begin. 

Jade quickly hoists herself up on the counter top. 

Louis runs over to a chair that randomly stands just outside the kitchen door. Zayn is sitting on the dining table, juggling not to fall off for some reason. Perrie jumped onto the sofa, running out of the kitchen for no reason.

Jade from her position looked down at her deserted meal. “Shame.” She playfully frowns at the tomato sauce. From her position it was easy to open the fridge. Jade grabs some food and starts eating out of the fridge “can’t say that I hate this game!” She chews on some sausages. 

“Hey Jade? Can you pass a beer?” Louis calls to her. Jade shrugs and grabs a beer, throwing it over to him. 

“SHOT GUN IT!” Zayn screams and Louis pops the tin can to drink it in one. It is oddly difficult to swallow everything. 

“Your turn” he burps. They start a line, Jade throws to Louis, who passes it to Zayn. Zayn shotguns. Then it’s Perries turn, who is starting to shiver from the AC. Then Jade takes her own shotgun. Zayn almost gets disqualified while he tries to get to Perrie, to warm her up of course. He also claims she is the castle, whoever reaches her first wins. Louis jumps over some stupidly placed books and chairs, while Jade from her position at the fridge keeps telling him ‘thats sinking’ and ‘the books are burning’. Zayn on the other hand jumps on the railing and almost slips with his sweaty feet. Perrie almost has a heart attack, screaming her tiny heart out while she watches him slip. He manages to stay up with his small muscles and his abs holding him like a plank. He gets back on the railing and jumps towards her. She’s sweating from watching his dangerous manoeuvre. “Don’t give me a heart attack like that!” 

“C’mon it’s part of the game.” He laughs and looks towards Louis, lifting his hands up to show his nonchalance. Louis is currently balancing on a tiny table, which according to Jade is acidic.

“You almost fell off.” Perrie says.

“Almost being the operative word.” Zayn grins while he grabs her biceps to push her into his lap. 

“You could have fallen and hurt your head.” Perrie whines.

“You sound like my mother.” Zayn says annoyed. 

“I just worry.”

“Yeah quit that!” Zayn sharp voice cuts through the air. Louis freezes where he is balancing on beer keg. He turns to Jade who has her ‘I-hate-Zayn’ face on. It’s hard to describe what it looks like, but it’s in the name. Louis looks back to see Perrie looking hurt. Zayn let go of her arms and is now staring at her, with fire in his eyes. Louis remembers that expression, it’s the same one he had when he talked to his sister Safaa. Zayn pushes Perrie away from himself and Louis feels like he missed a crucial part of the conversation.

Zayn gets up and purposefully disqualifies himself. Louis moans in frustration “what you doing pal?” 

“Heading out.” Zayn’s voice is still sharp. 

“Where to?” Perrie carefully asks.

“Getting some weed. Can’t stand it in here without it.” Zayn throws the door shut behind them and Louis turns to Perrie. Her eyes are welling up and soon Jade is at her side cradling her between her arms. She kisses her head and coos to her.

“I’ll order some food.” Louis says, helpless. He never knew what to do when people started crying. His sisters he knew how to help, other people not so much. Louis orders some greasy burgers from a rooftop bar that make delivery. When he returns to the living room, Jade is quietly whispering to Perrie. 

“It’ll be alright. It will be all alright.” She rocks her like a child. There is something so tender and familiar about that position. Louis goes into the kitchen and cleans up Jades mess. Saving the cold clean pasta in a tuber-ware he finds under the sink. He grabs one of the good wines and opens it, puts it on a tray along with three wine glasses. He approaches the girls. 

“Want to hang out on the patio?” They smile and nod. They sit on the cold stone of the patio and position the glasses around. Suddenly Jade squeals and gets up, when she comes back she is holding pillows and blankets. Louis pays for the delivery when it comes and bats away the money the girls want to give him to reimburse him. _Is it weird that I feel bad, feel responsible for their misery?_ Louis had asked Jade to come too, anxiety of spending his second week only with a couple. A couple that keeps on fighting with each other. They eat and laugh and it’s easy. It’s the first time he’s alone with these two girls, it’s going better than well. The wine is good, food is greasy and the gossip is better. He finds out that John had sent Ashton to a military retreat for the summer, to knock some sense into him. Calum had run away from home, because he was sick and tired of his fathers teachings, he was a preacher after all. Apparently he didn’t get very far, he ended up in Hemming’s boot when he went on a camping trip with his family.

Louis feels light-headed but not from the booze, from the company. Perrie lies her head into Jades lap and closes her eyes. With a delicate finger, Jade brushes her now blonde hair behind Perrie’s ear. There is a small smile tugging on her lips. Her eyes drifting over Perries face with velvety eyes. She brushes her cheek softly, like she’d brush away the last tear. And _OH…ohhhh._ Louis is having a lightbulb moment, he looks at Jade with an open face, open to the conclusion he’d just drawn. That’s when she looks up, “thanks Tommo!” She whispers softly.

“Oh? What for, love?” Louis is dizzy from the puzzle pieces that start to shift together. The fight over Jed, Perries hateful looks, and her cooing.

“For this.” She motions around them, around their small nest they had built.

“Right.” Louis grins. “You’re welcome.”

Louis wakes up in his bed. Perrie and Jade had slept outside in the nest, while Louis had moved out of their hair for the night. He showered, put on new clothes and tip-toed downstairs. He shouldn’t have bothered, he was met by Perrie’s shocked face by the master bedroom. “What’s wrong?”

“He’s not back! He always comes back. But he’s not back!” 

“Alright, come down.” Louis soothes her. “Have you called him?”

“A dozen times. Oh, God… it’s all my fault… I’m a terrible girlfriend!” Perrie tugs on her long hair forcefully making her eyes water. “I pushed him away.”

“Hey, hey.” Louis grabs her into a tight hug. “You didn’t. Remember? He pushed us away!” Louis feels her take in some shaky breaths. “He was the one to storm off, you did nothing, darling.” Louis lets go of her again. “Come on lets eat some breakfast and decide what to do then.” 

Louis takes her hand and guides her to the kitchen, where he finds Jade making eggs. “Full english breakfast.” She chants when Louis walks in. 

“Sounds amazing, love.” He sits Perrie down at the breakfast bar and they dig in. “Hey,” Louis says into the sad silence, “how about we go to one of those hippie markets and go shopping. I bet when we come back, Zayn’ll be home by then.”

“Wye aye! That's champion.” Jade perks up “I still need to buy some souvenirs for Karl.”

“Who is Karl? You dating again?” Louis asks around a mouth-full of toast.

“He’s my brother, bugga.” Louis finds the car keys in a plant. Perrie researches the best market to go to and soon they head off. He’s thankful Perrie chose a market with a 40-minute drive to the other side of the island. 

The market is overflown with people, small wooden booths stand in cooked lines, where individual talents show of their art: paintings, hand bags, scarfs etc. Jade is jumping around from one booth to the next and her livelihood makes Perrie smile. Sooner than later the best friends are having fun and Louis is snickering along with them. He lightens his cigarette, with a hateful glare from a woman Perrie just bought a dream-catcher from. “This looks mint.” Jade calls to them.

Perrie and Louis both join her at a shop. It has different things, but a bracelet catches Louis eyes. He tentatively grabs the piece, a few coins dangle from the chain. “Those are coins from Barcelona.” The shop keeper tells them.

“Why do you have things from Barcelona when we are in Ibiza?” Louis asks her. 

The woman colours a bit, “well there are lots of men that like to bring back things to their wives or girlfriends, who don’t know that the stag night was in Ibiza, so we offer alternatives.” 

Perrie starts giggling, “I love that.” 

Louis has a short think, “how much?” 

“23 Euros.” Louis harshly breathes in, and Jade has a harsh talk with the woman to get the prize down. Eventually, Louis pays 18 Euros. Jade is ogling a ring with a green stone, puts it on her middle finger and twists around a bit. But she finds the price to high, which is why Perrie buys it for her. Jade tries to protest, but Perrie grabs her hand and slides the ring onto her finger. Louis smiles at the notion. Jade’s cheeks have got a faint cherry colour and Louis takes a step back to morph into the background. 

They finish their stroll with Louis visiting the post office. He gets a small packet and takes a postcard as well. He only jots down a small note.

Always in my heart Harry Styles. 

Yours sincerely, Louis

He glues it together and addresses it to Harry E. Styles, Holmes Street 8 in Cheshire.

When the trio comes home, Zayn is still not back. Perrie gets antsy again, Louis and Jade are getting worried too. They put their shopping into their rooms, and Louis starts the car again so that they can aimlessly drive around. The positive side to this is that they get to know the island a bit better. But all they do is look for a raven-haired boy they can’t find. Their last stop is at Zayn’s graffiti wall, but they don’t linger because Louis is worried about the fat man returning and recognising their licence-plate. 

Arriving back at the house, they are exhausted and demotivated from the entire day. Jade cooks,because Louis can’t without killing them and Perrie is too worried to. “If he hasn’t come home by tomorrow, I’m going to the Police.”

“You want to go to the Polis?” Jade says unbelieving. 

“He’s been gone 24 hours!” Perrie retorts. 

“Let’s keep a clear head here.” Louis warns both girls. “We call his mum tomorrow, see if she’s heard from him. And Liam, he’s oddly friendly with him now. When no one knows him, then we go to the officials.” They watch Netflix in Jade’s room, Louis finds a picture of Harry in tiny lemon coloured shorts. His torso is naked and he’s showing of his ink. Louis takes a screencap to save the event for later wanks. When the trio starts falling asleep, Louis last thought before sleep is that he finally accomplished to send something to Harry.

The next morning, Jade wakes him up exclaiming that no one has heard from Zayn. Louis uses the emergency number Zayn had left on his dresser. His uncle is shocked enough to agree with them to go to the Police. He gives Louis directions and the name of an officer he knows speaks english. Louis drives the girls to the police. They give them Zayn’s information and his uncles phone number.

Back home, they get senselessly drunk. Music is blaring in the background when Perrie breaks down crying. Jade rocks her like a baby until she has exhausted herself. “You don’t understand any of it.” Perrie whimpers.

“We’re all in the same boat here.” 

“You don’t understand.” Louis shifts uncomfortably in the armchair. “You don’t know the ‘i-love-yous’ or the dancing on tables, the night phone calls, the drunken text. Your just jealous of us, how right it feels between us.”

“I know that it kept getting better, until he started using you and dropping you like brick into ice cold water.” Jade response, tearfully now. Perrie punches her chest away and sniffles loudly. Jade falls onto her back and stares up at Louis. There is something pleading and heartbreaking in them.

“How about you call the girls yeah?” Louis grabs Jade’s phone and video calls Leigh-Anne and Jesy. It takes a while to explain what happened and to get Perrie to speak coherently. 

“Do you remember what he said?” Jesy asks.

“I do, he told you he’d never ever hurt you.” Leigh-Anne says with snap in her fingers.

“Oh here we go again.” Perrie sniffles.

“Exactly, here we go again, another break-up and make-up, when are you going to wake up?” Jade leans forward to sneer into Perrie’s face.

“Please let me the one to call him out.” Leigh grins mischievously into the camera phone.

“Look at how many times he let you down.” Jade says wiggling her fingers, “I don’t have fingers for the amount of times anymore. That boy ain’t good enough for you!” Louis gulps his vodka down, even though he hates vodka, this situation is making him very uncomfortable. He can almost feel the nervous itching return to his skin.

“Stop.” Perrie weakly disagrees.

“When you’re on another break-up, I’ll be the one to say you’re beautiful.” Leigh says.

“One more word he never said at all.” Jade agrees. 

“That boy wanna fight but I never see him fighting for you. He'll never realise what he's got. Until it's gone.” Jesy says with a sober tone.

“See you’re worth girl! He knows you’re out of his league, if he likes it or not!” 

“Shut up.” Perrie sternly screams at Jade. With her right hand she throws the phone across the room. It makes a thumb sound on the red carpet. Louis squeals from the sudden forcefulness of it, trapping his legs between his hands holding the knees against his chest. “You don’t understand any of it. NONE!”

“You’re wrong, because we are the ones that have to put you back together EVERY. SINGLE. TIME!”There are tears welling in Jade’s eyes and her voice shakes from the force of the meaning that she puts behind the words said. 

“Go fuck yourself, you jealous shit.” Perrie stomps off and the door of the master shivers from the forceful bang. Jade stands up too, brushing her tears away when she walks to the patio. She lets her head dangle. 

Louis grabs the phone and excuses the girls, he must promise Leigh-Anne and Jesy to take care of both girls. He walks back into the kitchen and grabs the good rum. He pours two shallow glasses and ads some ice, before he walks over to Jade.

With a small shove he places the glass in Jades hand, she is sitting cross-legged at the edge of the patio. He sits down next to her, letting his feet dangle over the edge. Jade barely looks over. “You’re in love with Perrie.” Louis deadpans

Jade smiles sadly “that obvious?” Louis kicks around his legs like a child, nervously fumbling with his own hands.

“Are you going to tell her?” Louis shoots back. How is he going to tell her that he sees the way she look at her best friend, soft and gooey. How is he going to explain that is exactly the same face he makes when he looks at Harry. That their experiences are so similar, that they both love someone they shouldn’t. 

“I think I might.” Jade looks up and smiles sadly, “but I think she already knows.”

“Yeah maybe.” Louis nods. He raises his glass “to the brave then.” Jade giggles clinking her glass with his. A heavy feeling pulls on his gut, pulling deeper into his shame. _She’s so open, why can’t I return the favour. Why am I so closed up_. A small voice inside of him tries to say that Jade has probably had to deal with these feelings much longer than him. But _fuck that! I should be able to tell her that I have feelings for Harry, that he’s all I can think about. That I got a tattoo of a triangle on my heel, a national gay symbol. You know the saying? Tell a man by his ankle._

“Jade?” She hums into her glass, “would you go to the tattoo parlour with me?”

“Again?” She looks at him, her eyes crinkling a bit.

“Yeah, please!” 

“Sure.” She agrees. 

“You feeling better?”

“No offence to your boy and all, but he’s been a pain in my ass this past half year!” Jade says while they stand up.

“Yeah I know. He’s been…” Louis stops to look for the right words.

“A tosser!” Jade giggles. Louis nods. “All jokes aside, I’m the one she calls when she is lying on the bathroom floor, crying.” The words take up the space between them. 

“Hey,” Louis nudges her, “let’s get your mind on other things, yeah?” She nods and tugs herself into his side as they stroll out to his car. They don’t ask Perrie to come, but Louis quickly writes a few words on a post it.

Louis walks back into the tattoo parlour, which he has visited twice already in the last ten days. Erik looks up in surprise when he sees Louis again. “You getting addicted or something?” Louis grins back.

“Not really, just need to do something before I lose my bravery.” 

“Sure enough.” Erik smiles, “what is it then?” 

Louis shows him the inside of his right wrist “I want quotation marks here.” Then he lifts his arms to show his bicep “and Far Away with a dot at the end.” Jade stares at him lopsided. 

“What’s this all mean?” Jade asks with a smirk of an annoying female friend.

“Trying to show someone… how I feel.” Louis replies. 

“You have feelings?” Jade giggles. Louis shows her his tongue. Erik ignores the banter and starts getting everything ready. 

“Not going to regret this?” Erik asks.

“Not like the penguin.” Louis replies, while looking at different fonts for his newest tattoo.

“That’s my masterpiece, man. Don’t you dare hate that little wobbler.” Erik laughs and Jade chuckles. 

“Don’t worry Erik. Louis loves to show off his bum.” Jade wiggles her eyebrows at Louis.

“You’re defiantly the worst secret-keeper.” Louis shakes his head, which makes Jade giggle harder, even though she doesn’t understand the true meaning behind the words. But for a pleasant moment Perrie and Zayn are both forgotten.

💚🍑💙

“There’s pepperoni on the floor,” Jade frowns at the pepperoni that fell of the pizza the night before. Her hangover is prominent in her hard stare “ you’ve wasted it!” Louis rolls his eyes while he makes them both a glass of aspirin. 

“There you are darling.” He murmurs. They clink their glasses and gulp it down in one go. Louis stares down at his new tattoo. 

“Will the person know that you got a tattoo for them?” Jade asks while she rubs her forehead to calm the storm in it.

“Maybe, probably… fuck if I know.” Louis moans when he bangs his head on the counter in an exaggerated move to show his frustration. 

“You should start drama classes.” Jade manages half a smile. 

“Do we have any at College?” Louis wanders out loud when he stretches his spine. Before Jade answers, there is a small knock from the kitchen door. Perrie peek’s her head in. 

“Hi.”

Jade and Louis both stare at her “Hi!” 

“You better?” Louis asks, defusing the tension in the air. 

“I… sorry.” Perrie gulps and brushes her hair back. She turns to stare at Jade. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean any of it. Maybe a small part, but I know you’re helping me, and you look out for me. Your my best crutch. I’m sorry. You never deserved me being harsh.”

Louis shifts out of the room, wiggling like a penguin. As much as he appreciates her apology, that’s the moment for Jade to reveal her truth. For both Jade and Perrie, Jerrie really, to come together again. Louis is walking up and down in front of the sofa of the living room, sending silent prayers, like a dad, hoping his daughter gets the love she deserves. 

The front door smashes open. 

Zayn.

He’s dressed in the same clothes. His eyes are blood shot, his knuckles are broken like from a fight, his hair is dissolved and greasy. The jeans on his knees are scrapped open and slightly bloody, he’s pale and looks weary.

“ZAYN!” Louis squeals. “Where the fuck have you been, mate?”

“What do you mean?” Zayn asks, while walks towards Louis. He’s slightly taller than Louis, and it scares him a little.

“You were gone for three days!” Louis says firmly, fuck getting intimidated. He straightens his spine to make himself taller.

“So?” Zayn ruffles his greasy hair.

“SO WE WERE WORRIED SHITLESS!!!!!!!” Perrie screams from the kitchen. Zayn turns around to his girlfriend, her eyes are huge and hurt. Jade is holding on to the small of her back, lips slightly pinker than before. 

“I needed time off. I always do this.” Zayn shrugs it off.

“You disappeared! In Ibiza of all places. We thought you were dead in a ditch or high on meth, helpless, dying!” Perrie starts rambling and Zayn snorts un-caring.

“Come on!” Zayn laughs meanly. “I wander off, I always come back, babe.” 

“Don’t fucking babe me!” Perrie holds up her finger in a warning. “We worried, Zayn. Fuck’s sake we called the police and your mum.”

“You did what?” Zayn’s shocked for the first time since he walked in.

“Yes. We called the police, that’s how concerned we were for you. Still am. Look at you.” Zayn looks down at himself as if he hadn’t realised his state of disarray.

“Mate, we called your uncle and it was the first time in seven years he had a civil conversation with your dad.” Louis budded in. He didn’t want to render the impression that he’s not mad at the situation either. “Where the fuck were you?” 

“Fuck off, Tommo.”

“No. No. Good question Louis, where were you?” Jade calls over Perrie’s shoulder.

“Shut it pissy.” Jade gulps at air like a fish. Perrie walks forward, causing Jade’s hand to fall away from her.

“You don’t get it do you? You don’t get that you can’t just piss off whenever you want.” Perries’ gone pale. 

“I do what I want.” 

“That’s bullshit. You could have texted us. Anything to tell us that your alive, you have to admit that we would be worried.”

“Told you to shut it didn’t I, Tommo?”

“Fuck you too!” Louis calls back, ruffles his hair and walks out to the patio. He heard enough. Let the girls fight with him. Louis doesn’t listen to the shouts that are called against each other in the living room. He quickly grabs his phone and sends a text to Zayn’s uncle along the lines of his nephew being alive. His heart falls when Jade sits down next to him. She swallows visibly and twists her ring on her finger. Louis has never seen Jade this way. She’s always the strong one. Louis liked her so much because she was stronger than most women, had an incredible sense of humour and reminded him of himself. Seeing her this broken reminded him why he was so broken himself. “She’s not going back to him this time. She can’t.” Louis says.

“But she always does.” Her brown eyes go darker, when transcendent tears well up in them. Louis scoots closer to her to take her into his arms. She sniffles silently against his shoulder, withholding to fall apart right there. 

Louis remembers the moment before Zayn barged in, the moment he had begged god to let Jade have her happiness. That clearly didn’t work, _maybe I am just a black sheep._ Zayn runs to Jade. He crouches down in front of Louis and Jade, grabbing her hands. “You got a ring?” 

“What?” Jade tries to tare her hands away, but Zayn frantically holds on to them.

“The fuck, Zayn, let her go.”

“I need her ring!” Zayn grabs on to the small ring with a green stone, from the miscellaneous store, it currently situated on her left middle finger. 

“Ow” Jade cries out. She craned her finger to stop Zayn from ripping the ring from her finger. 

“ZAYN STOP!” Louis tries to bat away his hands, because there are tears forming in her eyes. Zayn has his tongue between his teeth and with one hard tug, he holds the ring in his hands. There are tears spilling past Jade’s eyes and she is cradling her hand. “Shit, you okay?” Louis asks while Zayn holds the ring up like Gollum. 

“I got that from Perrie.” She whispers brokenly.

“You’ll get it back, promise.” Louis slings his arm around her shoulders, and gently pries her hand out of her own. The finger is swollen and there are purple bruises where the ring used to be. “I’ll get ye some ice.”

Zayn stumbles over the couch. He falls to the floor and gets up with a shaky head like a dog. “Perrie.” He cries out, stumbling like he’s blind. Jade and Louis turn around to him. Perrie is frozen in place where she is standing. “You’ve been her with me. For me. I thought this is a curse, but it might be blessing.” There is an outraged huff somewhere, “I’m stuck now, cause I need you, touch and feel how much I can see you. I was drunk… drunk… so drunk all summer, just drunk. But Baby let me be your man, so I can love you. And if you let me be your man, then I’ll take care of you.” With a loud thud he follows to his knees, his face shadows into pain, before he looks back up. “Marry me.” He holds Jade’s ring up to Perrie.

Her face goes from shock to recognition. Her eyes on the ring dart to Jade and back. Louis quickly takes a look at Jade too, the red eyes have forgotten the tears and are big, her breath hitched, she’s paralysed. And Louis can hear the begging in her mind. Begging _her_ to say No. Perrie seems to hear it too, because she’s looking at Zayn with confusion all over her brows. “That Jade’s ring?” She asks breathless.

Zayn doesn’t seem to understand why she would ask that, furrowing his brows and shaking his head. Shortly he drops the hand with the ring to furiously rustle his hair, “I’m seeing the pain and seeing the pleasure, marry me.” Again he thrusts the ring towards her.

“Zayn…” Perrie’s hands are shaking.

“Don’t look around cause love is blind and right now I can’t see you” Zayn’s eyes are pressed close as he wiggles the ring in front of her “… darling?” 

“Zayn you don’t want this, you’re drunk.”

“Intoxicated because of you, please Perrie! Baabbyyy-” He sings, lifts one eyelid. He looks at her as if she were the sun and his eyes squint.

“Stop Zayn please.” Perrie kneels in front of him. She whispers, “Zayn we can’t… I can’t. I’m sixteen. I can’t marry you.”

“I’ll wait.” His eyes are still closed and he breaths the word into her face. 

“I just… can’t!”

Zayn stands up, “you know what fuck you, fuck this!” He throws the ring at her. It jumps off of her forehead and she whines from the short impact. Zayn storms off. Louis sees Perrie bend forward to pick up the ring from the floor. She walks over to Jade and slips it back on her right middle finger this time. 

“You okay?” Perrie flips a tear off of her cheek. Jade nods dumbfounded, blinking viciously to understand what is happening right now. “Louis,” Perrie turns to him “I think we need to get out of here, I’m sorry. Can you be alone with him?” 

“Go.” Louis nods chin towards the master bedroom, “don’t worry about me. Get out of here.” 

“Okay let’s pack.” Louis helps the girls pack quickly, aimlessly throwing clothes into bags. Sooner than later, he shuffles them out off the main door, toward the uber driver. He hugs the girls and gives Jade a wink. 

Louis walks into his own room and starts packing too. Mid-pack he stops himself and stares at his hands. _Fuck what do I do now? I can’t stay here, can I? With Zayn being such a high prick, there is a solid reason not to stay here._ He grabs his phone and dials his mother’s number. 

“Hello Baby, how’s Ibiza.” 

“Mum,” Louis whimpers. 

“Oh god, what happened?” His mothers voice goes up in worry.

“I think I need to get out of here.”

“Okay, boo.” Louis can hear his mother shuffling, “Dan dear, can we change Louis flight, honey?” There’s some mumbling. He talks to his mother for a bit and explains to her that Zayn went missing and came back high. Surprising Perrie with an impromptus wedding proposal.  


“Oh boy, that sounds… I don’t even know what to say to that.” Jay trails off. “Honey, Dan says we can’t switch your flight, but Dan thinks you could pack your things and go to the airport. See if they can change it there. Nothing is going out today anymore, but you can stay at a airport hotel.”

“I don’t have any money anymore.”

“Don’t worry, we can pay for it, love.” 

“I think I’ll do that tomorrow morning.” 

“Alright, just be safe boo. Stay out of Zayn’s hair if he’s too angry.”

“Yeah.”

“Promise me, boo!”

“Promise mum.”

“I love ye.”

“Me too.” Louis hangs up and stares at his bags. He finishes his packing and orders some pizza. 

“That the girls?” Zayn asks him from the kitchen.

“No my pizza.” Louis pays the delivery guy and says “Gracias.” 

“Where the fuck are they?” Zayn puffs his chest. 

“They went home, Zayn.”

“What?” Zayn looks way too surprised.

“They wanted to get out of here. They were worried about you for the last three days after a stupid fight.When you came back ye screamed at us some more, and tried to make the situation better by a fucked up proposal. What ye expect them to do?”

“What’s wrong with you Tommo?”

“Maybe I’m fed up with ye too!” Louis says firmly. “And ye don’t happen to understand any of it.”

“Then why don’t you follow ‘em?” Zayn spits.

“I am, after this pizza and a good sleep, I’m out of yer hair!” Louis turns on his heal like a diva and saunters back to his room.

“Fucking queer asshole.” Zayn whispers. Louis ignores the sink in his stomach. _Is this what I have to deal with from now on?_

💚🍑💙

Louis is waiting in front of the main door for his uber driver. He’s a little nervous to go to the airport without a ticket, he really hoped that things would have gotten better with Zayn, but he’d been ignoring him all day. A taxi stops in front of him, and Louis checks his phone. His uber driver, Federico, is still ten minutes out. A man gets out of the car. He has a square face, dark brown eyes and short raven hair. 

“You Louis?” The man asks. 

“Yes, Sir. Who are ye?” The man approaches him and grabs his hand. 

“Iman Malik.” His grip is strong on Louis small hand. “You’re the one I have been talking to on the phone.” 

“Yepp.” Luis nods.

“You off today?” He looks at Louis’ suitcase that he is perched on.

“My flights tomorrow, trying to go to the airport to change my flight.” Iman nods thoughtfully.

“Well, if you wait, I can drive you there myself and talk to one of the clerks. I know all of them.”

“Thanks, that’ll be great.” Iman smiles tiredly. “Do you mind if I stay outside, not really in the mood to be in the middle of all that.” 

“Yeah, that’s not going to be pretty.” Iman grabs a cheap pack of cigarettes and lights one, Louis grabs one himself after getting the offer from Zayn’s uncle. “I have to take him home too.” 

Louis nods, staring at Iman “guess his parents aren’t happy with him are they?”

“Not in the slightest. What was it this time?” Iman takes a drag while fixing Louis with hard eyes. “Drugs?” Louis doesn’t answer, and tries to scold his face into emptiness. “You’re a loyal lad, I respect that.” 

“Thank you.” Louis smiles. Iman takes a deep breath and walks into his house. Louis cancels his uber driver, while listening to the screaming coming from inside. Louis talks a little with the taxi driver, who happens to be a friend of Iman and tells him about the weirdest guests he has had. They both awkwardly ignore the whaling coming from inside.

After about an hour, Iman comes back out of the house. He’s holding Zayn by his neck and with the other hand he’s holding his suitcase. “We’re ready to go.” The taxi driver snags Zayn’s trunk and puts it into the boot next to Louis’. 

“You’ll pay for this.” Zayn whispers to Louis when they stand at the check-in counter.

“This is not me fault, ye did this yerself.” Louis hisses back. 

“You called my uncle, you fat-ass.” Zayn motions for towards the man, who is currently trying to charm the person at the counter. She’s already got red cheeks and a dopy smile on her thin lips. “They’re going to push me into rehab, you get that?”

“I had no idea Zayn.” Louis looks earnest which grants him less fierce brown eyes. “All we could think about was finding you. We had no idea how to do that, really, we don’t know this place. Us were scared.” 

“Think about that when I sit in rehab, dick face.” Zayn says, but it’s not as harsh as Louis thought it would be.

“I am sorry for this.” Louis finally says. Rising above and all that. He decisively did not apologise for calling and looking for him, but he will apologise for what the situation has turned into, because of this. Zayn is studying him, but does not say anything, when Iman makes a notion for Louis to push his bag towards him. “Really?”

“Yeah, got you a spot.” Iman grins proudly. Together they get his baggage checked. 

“Thank you so much, I don’t know how to thank you.” 

“Buy me a beer behind the security.” Louis nods affirmative. 

Dan picks him up from the airport. He hugs the boy tight and watches Zayn with judging curious eyes. He thanks Iman with a respectful handshake, before protectively ushering Louis towards his car. “Jay already got your car from Doncaster. She used the excuse to get the twins from Mark and see her parents.”

“Grand.” Louis says.

“You okay?”

“Better.” 

“It’s just the last time I saw you, you were crying and fleeing Cheshire.” Louis had forgotten about that. It doesn’t feel like that was the last time they saw each other, Dan had made it his mission to keep Louis informed about the shenanigans of the house. 

“I’m good. Thanks.”

“Yeah you seem better. More at ease.” Dan tries to pat his knee, but misses, hitting the cupholder instead. 

Louis chuckles, “I think I’m okay with it.” Dan is watching him quizzically but doesn’t ask what the boy means.

“LOUIS!!!!” Louis is run over by two blonde haired thunderstorms. They crash into him, making Louis tumble backwards onto the ground. 

“I missed you too.” Louis tickets their sides while they prepped him with kisses to his cheeks and kicks into his abdomen. 

“Alright, Alright, get off. Come on let him breathe.” 

“You just want to kiss yer boo.” Fizzy taunts their mother above Louis. She smiles down at him and waves at his nose. Louis grins and lifts the girls up with him. He gives Fizzy a kiss. “Ye all better then?”

“Yeah, yeah, cheers.” He moves on to give his mother a tight squeeze.

Her hand circles his cheek, “I was worried there for a moment, love.”

“I know. Sorry. I didn’t want to worry you, I just didn’t know what else to do.”

“That’s what parents are here for, lovey.” She gives him a kiss to the cheek. 

“I’ll go unpack.” He quickly dumps everything in his bag into the laundry bin. Carefully he takes out his notes and rolls them into one roll-up letter. He stuffs them into a pair of boots he rarely uses. He’s hoping that Harry doesn’t need to see the letters, they are incredibly exposing as they are now. Maybe he can just catch Harry’s ear in two days at the wedding and talk everything through. Tell him how he feels and that he wants him. I want him. Louis smiles to himself when he jumps down the stairs to hug his little sisters. 

“Louis, will you help us with the lasagna?” Phoebe says with hopeful eyes.

“Of course love.” He pats her on her head.

His mother interrupts, “how about I help you too.” She gives Louis a meaningful look. 

“Yeah, I’m still a shit cook, hasn’t changed.” 

“Language.” Both twins call, giggling while they imitate their mother. She fondly shakes her head. 

“It’s good to have all bebe’s under one roof again.” His mother says while they wait for the meat to simmer. The girls have disappeared halfway through to play with a new toy.

“Missed this mess.” Louis confesses. His mother reaches out to flip his fringe, Louis tries to bat away her hand, “not a boy anymore, mum.”

“Of course not. You’ve become so tall and strong.”

“You making fun of me height mum, it’s yer damn genes.” She laughs loudly, making her son smile. “Mum, why did you not give up, after failing twice, why didn’t you give up on love?”

“Because love is only for the brave. And if anything I’m going to show my kids that bravery gets reworded.”

“Diamonds don’t fall to dust?” Louis remembers her advice from a few months ago.

“When you know, you know.” Jay stands up and gives him a kiss on top of his head to go back to check on her meat. “I think it’s ready love.”

💚🍑💙

Liam is screaming into his ear, “off to rehab…detox…” Louis only catches some small snip bits. He holds onto Eleanor’s hand who is trying to twerk with Danielle, but El is not the dancer Danielle is, thus failing miserably. 

“How long will he be gone for?” Louis asks, turning to look right into Liam’s eyes. Their mouths almost touch is how close the two are sitting right now. The booth is draped in a porno red light and the leather is sticky under his bum. The girls are swaying against each other in front of them, not bothering to walk all the way to the dance floor.

“Two weeks.” Liam is holding up two fingers.

“Always thought those things take longer?” Louis asks.

“He’s just doing the detox right now… his parents hope he can do the stabilisation phase at home, so he can go to school again.”

“Have ye seen him?” Liam shakes his head. 

“He calls me sometimes, has a specific time when he’s allowed phone privileges.” Liam is looking at Louis funny.

“What?”

“It’s just… he wanted to know when he’d be able to talk to you. He wants to make peace.”

“12 step program, aye?” Louis says. Liam shrugs. “I just escaped that hell two days ago, ye have no idea how it was last couple days.” Louis shakes his head, almost hitting Liam’s. “Shouldn’t he be like shivering moaning mess right now, he must be faring good with the detox, in’t he?”

“Don’t know.”

“Liam?” Liam evades his eyes, “PAYNO!?! Tell me ye didn’t.” 

“Don’t know what you on about.”

“Ye never talked to him, yer just assuming everything.” Louis scolds. “Payno, these are things why people don’t like you.” 

“Don’t like it when people fight, mate. He’s our friend.” Liam argues.

“Ye can’t do the 12 steps for him, mate.” Louis claps him on his shoulder and Liam frowns. “For once I think it’s important he’d do it himself.” 

“I know you’re right.” Liam deflates. 

“Alright, now stop being a sourpuss…celebrate yer birds last night aye?” They turn to look at their girls dancing. Eleanor gives him a breathtaking smile. He envies her for her levity.

Eleanor is leaning into his side outside of the club. Louis is casually pulling on a cigarette, huddling her warm body closer. He’s shivering a bit. “You were a good boyfriend Louis.” She breathes hotly against his skin

“Ye were a great girlfriend too El. Your funny , adventuress, cocky, mostly kind ... it’s just...” 

“Don’t feel right, does it?” Eleanor supplies. Louis shakes his head, breathing cigarette smoke away from her, he’s not an asshole like that. “So what does?” She’s a little drunk and her lips brush against his jaw when she talks to him. 

“Do ye love Max?” 

“Oh Louis, love is something I can’t afford with my parents.” 

“Why?” 

“You saw how my dad looked at him. He wants me to do better. He’d force me to stop seeing him and change horse barns.” 

“Why’s he so entitled?”

“He works for Sony, you know higher up. Has had his own company and shit. Worth 2.5 billion, but he sold it to Sony. He works with them now.” 

“So he’s rich and entitled.” Louis first impressions of the guy were right then. Eleanor hums into his ear. “We could stay together.” Louis says. Eleanor freezes at his side. “Relax, just publicly. We’d both be free to be with the person we want to be with.”

“You serious?” Eleanor winds out of his embrace to stare at the side of his face. 

“Don’t have to.”

“Who do you have to hide?” El asks.

Louis swallows harshly, _might as well be honest_ “Harry.” 

“Harry? As in Harry Styles or Harriet … whatever her last name is.” 

“Styles. I don’t even know the other one.” 

“She’s a bit bland…” Eleanor trails off. Finally, she fixates him “you gay then?” 

“Let’s go with queer.” Louis answers sucking on his cigarette. 

“How did I not see that?” Eleanor huddles back into his side. “So you don’t want anyone knowing that you’re in love with a boy.” 

“Same as you.” Louis stumps the dead cigarette beneath his foot. 

“You want to pretend to be together, but date other people, so were like friends with benefits pretending to be in a relationship.” 

“Label it all you want, I’m trying to get me boy back.”

“Back?”

“Yeah I keep getting with him and then I fuck off. I… always when I’m with him, I get scared with all the _what if’s_..”

“Do you want him, Lou?” Eleanor stands in front of him, looking him dead in the eye. “Because if you do you’re going to have to prove to him that you not leaving this time! You have to prove to him that you want him and only him. He’s not some pastime.” Louis grins at her. 

“See cocky… ye’re little dictator.” She laughs and seals their non-commitment with a kiss. “Ye coming to me mum’s wedding, babe!” 

“Yes, Sir.” Eleanor salutes and falls backwards in the attempt to click her heals. Louis catches her in time.

💚🍑💙

Louis is jiggling on his feet, moving around, running his sweaty hands over his thigh. “Stop that.” Lottie says. “You’ll ruin the suit.” Louis ignores her and frantically looks around to find him. He’s not sure if he is excited or nervous to see him. 

Hours later, _in Louis time_ , which probably means another ten minutes or so, there are five figures approaching. Two couples and one lone gentleman. Anne looks stunning in a blue stripped long dress, holding on to Robin in a grey mate suit. Gemma is tucked into her dates’ arm, smiling at him. And right next to the couple, he strides with confidence, his black suit sits comfortable on his straining thighs and perky bum. His chestnut hair is held in a black hat. It’s longer, falling to his slightly hunched shoulder in corkscrew curls. There is a scarf dangling from his strong neck, framing his half buttoned black blouse. It shows of his new bird tattoo across his chest. He’s the most beautiful sight Louis has seen in forever. 

Louis’ breath has gone cold, his fingers are twitching at his side. His heart is sinking in the comfortable feel of Harry’s presence. He could feel his guard dropping when he fully turned around to Harry, his face going soft. _I need him. I need him right now. In my arms._ Harry steps up to one of the guests he must have recognised from town. He looks up and meets Louis’ eyes. Louis mouths an exasperated ‘Hi’, maybe he’s imagining it but there is a small tear welling into the socket of his eye. He’s completely taken back by how much he missed the tender green eyes. Harry gives him a tight smile and a nod. “What does that mean?” Fizzy asks next to him. 

“I don’t know.” Louis answers, when Harry turns back to his family. An Usher guides the party to some seats and Louis tries to stare at Harry again, trying to will him to turn around to him. Eleanor walks down the aisle to take a seat near the front. Louis sees exactly when Harry sees her, his head snaps, as if he wanted to flick his hat off of his head. His shoulder sag and his head falls to stare at his hands in his lap. He can see an arm snake a hand between his shoulder blades and rub him. Gemma’s date turns around to stare at Louis, and to Louis shock he’s staring into the icy blue eyes of Niall Horan. For the first time in forever Niall does not smile. They reek disappointment. 

A hand on his arm makes him stop. He hadn’t even realised that he started walking towards the Irish to explain himself to pour out his heart for Harry. “Mum’s car is here.” Louis tares his eyes away from the two to stare at the street, where the bride’s car had stopped at the entrance of the park where the wedding was being held. 

“I have to explain.” Louis weakly says, turning back to Harry.

“Not right now.”

“No ye don’t understand…”

“Nah, ye don’t understand. It’s our mum’s wedding. Yer the one walking her down the aisle, what ever shit ye got to talk out with him can wait. Ye promised.” Louis looks at Fizzy. He wants to argue, but ends up stalking over to his mother’s car.

He walks his mother down the aisle, cries when Dan says yes and tugs the twins into his side after they throw the flowers. Dan had made his promise true to allow them to be flower girls. Fizzy and Lottie make beautiful witnesses and his grandfather makes the perfect ring bearer. But Louis also cries when ice-y blue eyes pierce his when he gives his grandmother a handkerchief. He shivers when he sees the big blotches of tears running down Harry’s beautiful cheeks, flattening his dimples. _This is all going so wrong. Why? How could this be?_

Louis takes his last hope and bravery in and stumbles towards Harry. “Ye look beautiful.” Harry turns around to him. There is still a line between his eyebrows, and his dimples aren’t back, but he blushes lightly. 

“You too.” 

“Me mum ordered this for me.” Louis swirls on the spot. It was an electric blue that made his eyes pop and clings to his ass like a swimming trunks when they are wet. Harry seems to think so too, after his eyes are barely able to detach from the glorious sight. “Thought it fit to me eyes.”

“Does.” Harry says.

“Ye came alone?” Louis steps next to him to order a martini from the bartender. Harry swirls an olive in his clear drink.

“Odd I didn’t actually get a plus one. Gemma did, though.” He points to where Gemma is leaning into Niall’s side. Louis grins to himself, _thank you Fizzy!!!!_

“She brought Niall?” Louis says instead.

“Yeah, I wish they’d stop. I’m 90 percent sure they’re only doing this to provoke me.” Harry gives him a small smile. “They went out last summer, I thought it was disgusting, they think its funny.” 

Louis laughs at Harry’s sour face. “I get it now.” 

“Not fair.” Harry moans. 

“Oh. Hi Harry.” Eleanor jumps up next to them. Harry freezes, Louis gives her a face to make her leave but she seems to have something urgent on her mind. “You have to make a speech.”

“I barely know them.” Louis says, which makes Eleanor snort and Harry turn around to him, amusement shadowing his sadness.

“Are you joking?” Eleanor asks.

“Can’t grandpa do it?” Louis whines.

“Nope.” Eleanor waves at Louis grandfather, who is making signs for him to come to the dance floor and make a speech. “He says he’ll make one later. He said it’s in your job description.” 

“Cheeky fucker.” Louis mumbles.

“Break a leg.” She giggles. Louis pulls a face at Harry, which makes him smile only in the slightest. He walks towards the mic stand. 

“You back together then?” Harry asks Eleanor while he’s staring at the hateful olive, which seems to be mocking him. Olive, an acronym for I love. 

“I’ll let him explain that to you.” Eleanor says, making Harry turn to her. She leans forward gives Harry a kiss on the cheek. “I hope you’ll allow me to kiss him tonight.” Then she leaves the very puzzled Harry behind. 

The night goes on, from dinner to cake to more speeches and finally the dance floor opens. Louis is mostly busy trying to keep his sisters in line. He allows Lottie’s new boyfriend Tommy to dance with her when he and Tommy have to free one of the twins out of the bathroom after she tangled her hair in one of the hand dryers. Shortly after, he and Eleanor help his grandparents into their car when his grandmother almost passes out on the table. About twenty minutes after the introduction song, danced by the bride and groom, Fizzy grabs Eleanor’s hand. “I’ll dance with yer bird, you get yer boy.” Louis nods and looks to where Niall, Gemma and Harry are sitting. Harry had taken off his hat and his curls bounced freely on his shoulder now. His head was nestled in his hand as he perched himself up on his elbow. Niall gives him a kick against the shin when Louis approaches. 

He straightens his jacket while Harry slowly turns to face him. Louis stretches out his hand, “may I have this dance?” Harry looks at the hand and shakes his head. “I think it’s forbidden to decline such a thing from the official bride away giver.”

“Away giver?” Harry smiles tentative. “I don’t think that’s a thing.”

“Alright, Harold at our wedding I’ll live that position empty then.” Harry is staring at him with big shocked eyes. Louis locks eyes with Gemma who gives him a sign to continue. “Come on, please.” Louis grabs for Harry’s hand, softly taking every single finger, one by one, from his champagne glass. “No gentleman should be sitting for too long at a wedding.” Their fingertips are dancing with each other. 

“Why don’t you ask your girlfriend?” Harry nods towards Eleanor who is currently swaying with Louis grandfather across the dance floor. Her brown hair flies in the air like a feather.

“Go on, Styles.” Niall gives Harry a shove, which makes him slip off his chair by its force. Thank God for Niall’s drunkenness. 

Louis drags Harry onto the dance floor. One hand in his large one, Louis places his other featherlike on Harry’s hip. He can feel the love-handles there and smiles up at Harry, who places one hand on his shoulder. Slowly they start to sway. “Harry, I’m glad I finally found a moment with you.” Harry hums. “I see you got me present.” Harry looks at his hand, where the Barcelona bracelet is dangling against Louis’ shoulder. 

“It’s not what I was expecting.” Harry finally says.

“What were you expecting? More?” Louis tries to catch Harry’s gaze again.

“Just something different, I suppose.”

“Like a declaration?” Louis reads Harry’s mind. Harry blushes lightly under the dim evening light. “I’m sorry for running out on you.”

Harry’s eyes finally fixate on him. “Why are you treating me like this?” 

Louis swallows, “I deserve that.” He whispers and suddenly dread fills him, replacing all hope he had felt earlier on. He should have followed Liam’s advice and sent his letters. They were so much better than anything that he could say right now. “I came back to you…” Louis tries speaking around the lump in his throat that is cutting off his air supply.

“You didn’t, though, did you?” Harry stops swaying. His hand leaves Louis shoulder, but Louis holds tight to the retreating hand in his. “When you came back, you went to her. I wasn’t the first person you thought of when you came back, was I? I had no choice but to come to this wedding. You didn’t come and find me. This is just a coincidence.” Harry turns away to flick at his cheeks, possibly trying to walk away.

“Harry.” Louis grips the hand tighter, forcefully turning Harry into his arms. “Lots of shit happened over the summer, things… just a lot.” Louis shakes his head, there is no way he can explain everything that happened over two weeks in this short a time. Harry won’t stand for to long to listen. “Proposals and tattoos and… missing people, drugs… I couldn’t come find you… after all of that.”

“Couldn’t or wouldn’t?” Harry’s voice is lower than usual. Forcefully he grabs Louis hip and manhandles him into the submissive position. He takes a long step forward, and suddenly Louis is launched into a waltz.

“I had no idea you could properly dance.” Louis says amused, while he digs his fingertips into Harry’s shoulder, trying not to step on Harry’s large feet. He lets him lead, taking tentative and stumbling steps to do what Harry wants.

“Took a course, everyone should be able to lead someone into a dance.” 

“Look at you all proper.” Louis snickers, but the humour fails when he sees Harry’s lips pull downward. 

“You’re evading my question.” Harry says. He makes him turn into a spin in his arms and his eyes fixate on Louis free flopping wrist. He stops in the middle of the dance floor to stare at Louis wrist. “This permanent?” Harry’s large thumb rubs his pulse. 

“Yeah, got it in Ibiza.” Louis is watching Harry’s unreadable expression. “You know what it means right?”

Harry stares at the quotation marks. “Why?” Harry goes back to leading Louis into another slow dance. “Why would you get a matching tattoo to mine?” 

“Am I not allowed to?” Louis muses.

“Stop being so defensive.” Harry argues, taking a step to wide and colliding with Louis hip bone. Since he couldn’t fallow so fast, Louis’ nose bumps against Harry’s sternum. “I’m so tired of you being so tough.”

“Yet here you are… and you have no idea how much you expose me.” Harry’s face remains expressionless. Louis’s finger tracks Harry’s sternum, watching as the goosebumps erupted there. “Look I built up these walls all around me, since coming to Cheshire. And I’m trying, really, to make them fall. These high walls never broke me, but in the last few weeks I watched them all come fallin' down for you.” He looks up at Harry again, hands remaining on his strong chest, while Harry leads them into a different direction, evading the bride and groom gracefully. Louis has never seen Harry be as graceful as now, _where is that stumbling giraffe baby_. “I have never been this defenceless, Hazza. If anything I want to thank you, because of you I actually came to terms with some of the stuff that has been on my mind. I wouldn’t be the person I am now if I hadn’t met you. If you hadn’t challenged me.” 

“Aren’t you ever lonely inside your head?” Harry asks, confused by the things Louis is saying. Harry blushes when Louis steps onto his tiptoes to whisper into his ear.

“Be my little secret.” 

“I don’t want to hide anymore.” Harry breathily says. “I won’t be your mistress at the side. I’m not the other woman.”

“You can’t force me out of the closet Haz.” Louis goes back onto the balm of his feet.

“Louis, I wanted you to be clear with what you wanted, I won’t force you out of the closet. But I won’t let you treat me this way anymore.”

“Harry, please. I know how to love you. You will see its easy to be loved. I know you wanna be loved.” 

“I won’t be your dirty little secret, while you treat me like shit in front of everyone else. I deserve better than that. I don’t want to look over my shoulder to see if Eleanor is watching us, to hide our kisses in a kitchen, because she’s next door. When you’re with me, you’re either in or out. Nothing in between.” Harry steps away from Louis and turns around, disappearing in a storm of people. _It’s not what I meant._

💚🍑💙

💚🍑💙

“But Li its not what I meant. He thinks I’m with El and that I want him as my side piece, but I though I was being romantic telling him to be a secret for a while, you know…oh, why do I always say the wrong things around him?” Louis shakes his head annoyed. 

“You have to tell him.” Liam is perched in his desk chair while he is watching Louis deteriorate in front of his face.

“How?” 

“Waltz over there and tell him. Not that hard Louis.”

“He won’t believe me. He thinks I spent my summer not thinking of him.”

“Well did you?”

“NO! You know that not true. Payno!” Louis whales as he thrusts his head against Liam’s headboard heavily.

“Drama queen.” Liam smiles.

“Why are you all smiley, be empathetic.” Louis throws one of Liam’s teddy bears at him. 

“Harry told me before you came back that you’d have time till summer ends. You’re still well in that timeframe. Okay? Just get your shit together and apologise, tell him the truth.”

“Help me, Liam.” Louis pouts. 

“Get some flowers, ‘cause clearly Haz is a sucker for that shit. And give him your letters for Christ sake!” Liam leans forward in his chair. “Because you have more than one right?”

“How’d ye know?” 

“Louis, you told us that you were a writer, at least you are good at it. I’m guessing it’s how you are coping with everything that is happening right now, so give him your letters and you’ll give him the entire dialog that has been happening in your mind.” 

“You sure?” Louis fidgets with his hands, their just so…

honest.

“Yes.” 

The bell jingles, “need help?”

“I’m looking for flowers to apologise with.” 

“Pick something love. I guess roses always work.” Louis turns around and leaves the shop again. _Pft….bitch, can’t even give a proper advice._

The next store has better service skills. “I’m looking something to say sorry.”

The woman nods her round face, “well, there are lilies they represent getting over discord and unhappiness.” Louis nods and she picks some out of the flock. “These are hyacinths, when they are blue they are peacemakers.” She points at blue bell-like flower. 

Louis smiles down at them, “I think he’ll like those, they are… they have my eye-colour.” 

“Oh yeah, that’s right.” She starts picking some and adding them to his flowers. 

“How about a rose or two?” Louis nods grateful. She wishes him good luck when he leaves the shop with a thirty bill flower arrangement in his hand. He gets into his car and heads for Harry’s house. _I hope he’s home._

Louis is very nervous making his hand shake a little. “Thats right that’s the bell.” The neighbour calls. Louis almost loses the letters that he had squished between his thighs so that he could reach out to the bell.

“I know where the bloody bell is mate!” Louis exclaims. “Ye ever loose yer nose because it’s quashed by other peoples business?” The neighbour looks at him and turns around hiding behind his hedge again, but his eyes still bore into Louis. Louis exhales and punches the bell. He grabs the roll of letters back into his hand. The door swings open and there he is. The most beautiful man Louis has ever seen. He swallows hard, those curls look bouncier than ever and they look good, so good when their longer, brushing his shoulder delicately. 

“Is it the pizza?” A girl with dark hair appears at Harry's side. Grabbing a hold of Harry’s arm. Louis face falls, he cant help himself. There is the green dragon again gnawing at his insides, screaming to throw himself at her and away from his boy. His eyes squint at the girl with the long hair that falls miraculously around her waist and enfolds them in a honey scent. Her deep brown eyes fixate on Louis “oh no pizza. You never told me you had a lover boy.” She whispers the last sentence into Harry’s ear and gives him a kiss to the cheek, giving Louis a side eye. 

“Give us a minute.” She pouts but jumps back into the house and disappears from Louis view. “What are you doing here Lou?” 

“Hi.” Louis shakes himself, but the feeling of betrayal and hurt don’t pass. “Just wanted to say thank you for comin’ to me mums wedding.” He thrusts the carefully picked flowers towards Harry.

“Thanks.” He looks at them. “These are lilies right?” 

“Yeah.” Louis stares at his feet, so that he doesn’t have to look at the gorgeous human being in front of him.

“And blue hyacinths which are peacemakers right?”

“Sure.” Of course Harry was the kind of person who knew the symbolisms of flowers, _way to obvious Tommo!_ Quickly he hides the letters behind his back. Harry’s obviously over him and dating girls again. That drivel on his pages will only embarrass him now.

“You saying sorry Lou?” Harry makes eye contact with him and sees the other hand behind Louis back. His meadowy eyes clear up, “Whats that?” Harry asks, trying to pry around Louis back.

“Nothing. Just something stupid.” 

“Well, if it is something stupid, you could show me.” Louis jumps back when Harry tries to serge forwards. A small breathy laugh escapes Louis, when Harry’s arms sneak around him to grab at his hands hidden in the small of his back. 

“Still want my pizza!” A voice screams from inside. The short spell is broken.

“I get it.” Louis says with a small voice “... I obviously took too long... have fun with your date Haz.” He says and scurries backwards towards his car. He can’t look up to afraid what his own eyes will tell Harry about his current state.

“Lou wait...” but he’s already in his car. Starting up the engine. Blindly dialling El’s number while he hastily flicks the tear away, that was running down his cheek. _If lost him, he was mine! He’s supposed to be mine! And I lost him. My boy. My Harry is no longer mine._

“Hello friend of sex.” Eleanor coos into his Bluetooth while he pushes down the gas, houses of Holmes Street brushing past in a blur.

“Where are you?”

“With Liam whats wrong Louis? Baby talk to me! What happened?” Her voice goes stern.

“I was at Haz…” he can’t get further his voice betraying him. Earth shuddering breaths whistle through his air pipe. 

“Shit what happened.” A tinge of worry mixes with the stern.

“Can you please meet me?” He whines. 

“Of course...” with a little fuzz in the background, she acknowledges “Im bringing Liam... he looks very guilty.” Louis nods and hangs up. He uses the windshield wipers to get the world to clear up from the rain, but there is a terrible screeching sound. Alarming him to the fact that he is full on crying now and the world can’t clear up. He whimpers while his hands go white on the steering wheel. “I’m just so stupid.” He cries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please klick the kudos button if you like the story so far & I’d love it if you’d leave a comment. Thank you.
> 
> Some explanatory/miscellaneous notes:  
> 1\. The middle finger is known as the gay ring finger  
> 2\. Among the many tattoos that Louis has, he has a penguin wearing headphones on his butt.  
> 3\. This chapter is heavily influenced by the lyrics written by the speaking parties.  
> 1\. Louis letters are influenced by the One Direction songs ‘Fireproof’, ‘Torn’, ’Spaces’, ‘If I could fly’, ‘Midnight Memories’, C’mon  
> C’mon’ and ‘does he know’. Also Louis solo songs ’Too Young’, ‘Always’, “Defenceless’, ‘Walls’, Miss You’, and ‘Back to you’.  
> 2\. Zayn’s proposal is also from his songs ‘I won’t mind’, ‘It’s you’, ‘Let Me’, ‘Pillowtalk’, ‘Fingers’ and ‘Drunk’.  
> 3\. The girls Skype call was inspired by their song ‘Boy’.  
> 4\. At 1D Day Zayn created graffiti, similar to the on in this story.  
> 5\. The Naked Attraction scene is heavily influenced by their participation for Gogglebox.  
> 6\. Iman Malik is the only character that is not a real person.


	6. A Captain's Word

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween everyone!
> 
> Special thanks to my twin, who read this whole Halloween special within one night so the chapter could come out in time for Halloween. :*
> 
> (Trigger warning: language, violence)
> 
> Enjoy<3

“Hello everyone.” 

“Here we go again.” Liam whispers while they are watching Headmaster Higgins pace in front of the assembly. 

“Welcome back to the sixth formers and welcome to lower sixth form to our next term. This is undoubtably the most important two years of your life.” Higgins continues. “These two, or last, year of your education will be the stepping stones to your futures. Don’t take this lightly, it will decide the jobs you will go to and the universities you will be applying to.” 

“He’s layin’ it on a little thick, in' he?” Louis asks.

“That’s right you weren’t here last year to hear his speech?”

“Nope.” 

“Well, he recycles it.” Liam grins.

“You’re being rather rebellious this morning, Payno.” Louis taunts him, remembering the teacher’s pet from his first day here. Liam widens his eyes like someone has caught him, straightens and leans back into his seat. Attentively listening again. “Wanker.” Louis says, loud enough for the girl in front of him to start giggling. “Where’s Zayn?”

“His mother decided he’d have to finish the stabilisation thing for another week. He’ll come back second week of.” 

“Like every year, I’d like to remind you that sixth formers are going on a college retreat begging of November. Where we are going is going to be revealed…drum roll? You really want me to do a drum roll?” Higgins turns around to a teacher Louis hasn’t seen before. He’s short with a round wobbly face, his blonde hair is cut very short and his physique is rather pudgy. He is nodding his head frantically. “It will be revealed later.” The headmaster says bored, meanwhile the round faced teacher looks disappointed in the lack of enthusiasm. “Please let your parents know that it will cost them 250 pounds.” 

“Each?” Someone calls.

“Seriously shoot me in t’ face.” Louis moans. How is he going to get 250 quid from? His mother and Dan only came back from their honeymoon two days ago, he overheard them whisper about saving up after the expansive wedding.

“Can’t we get some kind of a group discount?” Someone else laughs.

“If you do not come to the trip, you will have to do the same work here, in my excellent presence.” Higgins smiles. “It is designed to help you succeed during sixth form.” He claps into his hands. “NOW! Wake up everyone and get to work.” He makes a shooing motion with his hand. The students get into motion to head to their first classes of the new year.

“Let the torture begin,” Louis complains, when Liam pulls him to his feet.

After a truly torturous hour with Cow-hell, without Zayn, who at this point he started to miss chronically, and a boring lesson in Art, Louis walked back to his locker. He’s not sure why they assigned him a new one, but apparently someone thought that upper sixth form students were meant to have upper lockers. Louis could reach his that’s not the problem, it does become an issue when his pen flies to the back wall of the tin square, and he tries to wiggle onto his tip toes to grab at it. 

“Wow, they’re being cruel to you ain’t they?” Jade laughs, when she falls against the locker next to Louis.

“Let’s us say that me year ain’t startin’ off right.” Louis mumbles when he finally pulls the pen back into his hand. 

“Do you only have one pen?” Jade grins at his victory.

“There’s no reason to burden yerself with that much heavy itinerary when ye have one working pen.”

“Better hope it doesn't run out then.”

“Don’t jinx it.” Louis moans, and Jade knocks on her head for lack of better options. 

“My new teacher is shit.” Liam complains when he joins the two.

“Oh such vulgarities from Mr. Payno, what ever has happened?” Louis mocks him.

“There’s a new Maths teacher, because Mrs. Harris went to paternity leave. The new one is trying to be fun. I hate it when they try to be fun.”

“Poor, Li Li, how can we help?” Jade mocks, following Louis lead.

“Get him fired?” Liam tries. 

“Sure, or ye could just ye know crawl back up his ass and take refuge there.” Louis grins. 

“You make me feel all warm, Tommo.” Liam says, “don’t need anyone else’s warmth.”

“Ew… weird.” Jade looks disgusted. Louis laughs, his eye catches a bouncy curl. He hasn’t seen him since the wedding two weeks ago. The school uniform fits him just as wonky as last year, snug on some places, short at the ankles, exposing some sparkling boots, but too long at the hem of the shirt, making it look bulgy on his thin body.His curls surround his sharp-cut face and there are two bracelets dangling off of his skinny wrists. Louis thinks he can see Harry’s veins pop out, it makes him want to run his tongue along them. 

“Come on let’s go.” Liam pushes Louis into the other direction. Jade is giving them a confused and annoyed look, when they move away from her, leaving her to stand alone. “Don’t panic.”

“I intend to.” Louis says, getting his legs to move. They don’t seem to want to move away from the green siren calling him from the other side of the hallway. “Ye can let go of me again, sugar tits.”

Liam’s hands fall off immediately. “You okay?”

“Do me a favour?” Louis snaps at him, “don’t ask me that.” Liam nods, his eyebrows scrunched in thought, _too gentle that man baby_. “I need ye, I’ll say sa, alright?” 

“Got it.” Liam says, nodding sharply. “By the way, you see the new American?” 

“We got an American now?” Louis lets himself be distracted by Liam’s attempt.

“Oh yeah!” Liam says, he wiggles his shoulder “really long hair, short, she might even be shorter than you.” 

“Oh shut up.” Louis feels his cheek heat up. “That it then? That all yer intel on the new American?”

“Ahm… No. Apparently she has a younger brother, but he goes to school. Hey,” Liam slaps his arm, “maybe he’s with yer twins, ey?” 

“Yeah, I’ll ask them tonight.” Louis comes to a stop “How’s Dani?” 

“Good I think.” Liam slums a little, “busy.”

“Means she’s doing what she really loves.” Louis tries to motivated Liam. Danielle stepping into a new life also meant that she was neglecting the relationships she had at home, which included Liam. 

“Yeah I guess as much.” Liam says. Louis claps him on his shoulder sympathetically. 

“Broken hearts club.” Liam whispers when they slip into different classes.

Louis knocks on the door. “Mr. Corden?” Louis asks. The man turns around to face Louis, he’s the teacher that was so excited about the drum rolls during Headmaster Higgins speech. 

“How can I help you lad?” He smiles cheerily. For some reason he reminds him of Niall.

“I was wonderin’ if I could transfer into your class.”

“Aren't you upper class, though? You can’t switch I’m sorry.”

“I know, I know, but I had to repeat a year last year, I did drama in lower sixth at Doncaster. I was hoping to transfer the credits.” 

Corden looks at him thoughtfully. “That the transcript?” He’s looking at Louis hands that are cradling a few papers.

“Oh yeah.” Louis hands them over. “There also a suggestion for a new theatre play.” 

“What is that then?”

“I thought maybe, the students could write their own play. And their own music. There are some ideas in there, if that could sway you any way.” Corden smiles.

“Taking initiative than?”

“Yeah, tryin’.” 

“I’ll talk to Headmaster Higgins and read these.”

“Thanks a ton.”

“You will have to drop one of your other classes.”

“I’m alright with that.” Louis smiles, bouncing on his feet.

“Good to see everyone back!” Coach calls over the chatter in the changing room. Louis is busy ignoring the death stare from Niall, while he is fastening his cleats. Liam, the nerd, is already dressed, with a straight back he’s sitting next to Louis, smiling bright. “As you all know, we have some try-outs coming up next week, we have to replace the three players that left us over the year. If you know anyone, bring them along on Thursday. Our first game is in six weeks and until then I want all of you to try your hardest to impress me. Josh left us to pursue a career in something or other in Scotland, so the positions of Captain and Co-Captain are open. In a month I will be choosing who makes the cut.” 

Louis’ head snaps up, this is perfect, this is something he can direct his attention to. _I have to become Captain!_ He turns to look at Liam, and he winks, _yes the moron winked_ , at Louis. He zones out the rest of the speech and gets himself hyped from getting this captaincy. “Hey Tommo.” Louis turns around to look at Ashton, his nose look straight for the first time since Louis has seen him the last few months. “Got a minute?” 

“Oi.” Louis stops, and the team has to walk around them like cars around a roundabout. “How was military school?”

“Bad.” Ashton stays one-syllabled as always when talking to Louis. 

“Sorry about that.” Louis plays with his thumbnail.

“Yeah, your fault.” Ashton stares down at him. “Got a good punch though, not fancy doing this again.” He points at his nose.

“I will too.” Louis warns just to make sure. “Where’s Callum?” He looks around and doesn’t see the lad around.

“Got a real hard-on for Styles, don’t you?” Ashton laughs.

“Things like that get ye into nose-breaking situation, mate.” Louis says while rotating his shoulder. Ashton holds up his hand. 

“Why you care so much, what I do to a fag?” Ashton asks, when they join the team, picking up footballs each.

“I lived with him when I got here, mate. Feels wrong to betray that.” Louis shrugs. 

“Afraid of a spanking from your mummy?” 

“Yeah you’d like that wouldn’t ye? Ye like get a little slap to yer tickle.” Ashton barks a laugh, similar to Louis moments ago. The two pair up and start doing drills together. He can see that Liam is working with Dougie Poynter, and Niall is passing the ball with Halliday. “Ye know if ye weren’t such a cunt to other people, then I’d actually like ye, mate.” 

“If you would defend the idiots and the uglies, I might like you too.” Louis hits the ball to hard and it propellers itself towards Ashton's face. Ashton catches it with his hands, staring at the ball and back at Louis. Louis laughs into the sky, _whoops almost the nose again._ Louis almost does not see Ashton walk up to him, because he’s looking at the sky with crinkling eyes. _“_ Let’s just see who gets captain, yeah?” Ashton towers over Louis easily. 

“Yer never getting Captain!” Louis answers him, getting on his tip toes to look taller too.

“Wanna bet?” Ashton spits.

“Yeah I do.” Louis answers, he ain’t the person to back down from a challenge.

“Lets make this fun, give it some kicks and giggles… Kingship at college.” Before Louis can question what he means, Ashton says “You win I let your precious fags and uglies walk…I win I get to do what every the fuck I want.” It’s like a movie… he sees Harry running in front of him holding out his hands, curls jumping, ass skipping in the air while he runs in slow motion. Oh how he wishes it were a real memory not just a dream. Green eyes staring back at him, lips touching. Nothing else, just a feathery touch. Louis could cry.

Louis’ mind is blaring warning sirens. This could go terribly wrong. All the things he has done will be nulled. People will start hurting Harry again, Louis will become apart of those beatings too and he’d probably lose his starting position at footie, if he ever sees a championship game again. But Louis is quite cocky and believes that he can do this, if he can keep his head straight and focus.

“Aye. That’ll be tha’ then.” He spits into his hand, “truce till then.” Their hands slap together. Niall is watching him curiously, and Liam gives him a weird questioning look. A little flush of relief floods his veins, at least for the next six weeks he’ll be fine. 

💚🍑💙

It has been three weeks since Louis last saw or talked to Zayn. All the shit that had happened, Louis was sure he wouldn’t talk to him again, he was so sure of it he’d swear on his father’s (non-existing) grave. That is until he walks into Management class, that is the time he actually misses his partner in crime. Especially when Cow-hell, who had gotten a new grey beard making him look like a half-arsed Hagrid, was saying things like “where’s your butt buddy go? He leave you? Got a better offer?” Louis is fuming, red spots appearing on his collarbone. He’s already opened his mouth to counter the arrogant son of a bitch, when the speakers disrupt them both.

“Mr. Louis Tomlinson, please come to the headmaster’s office during break. Mr. Tomlinson to the headmaster’s office during break. Thank yooouuuu!” The headmaster’s assistant sings into the microphone. He had got a new and younger version of the old, who had too much fun with the open mic.

“Looks like your in a hole other problem.” The teacher turns around to address the class. “This year, I want no excuses. No bullshit about dogs eating homework or panic attacks during presentations…” Louis zones him out and concentrates on the crown of Jade’s hair. _Why am I going to the headmaster again? And who had a panic attack during a presentation? That’s fucked._ They hadn’t mentioned a reason for the visit at Mr. Higgins, and Louis was hoping that he didn’t screw up on his second day back. For the life of him, he can’t remember doing anything wrong. Really nothing. Cow-hell is staring glares of I-dare-you-all-to-disagree at the others, and Louis has to compare him to Snape. His sisters were binge-watching Harry Potter the last week, which made Louis’ mind snap back and forth to the Potter world. It’s a shame Cow-hell doesn’t have ahook nose, it would be perfect to stare past it. Louis sniffles a laugh, when he imagines his teacher with a horrendous large hooked nose sitting in the middle of his face. It makes the time pass by.

“Hey?” Jade whispers and throws a small note over her shoulder. Louis reads it, 

_u coming to Nick’s back-to-college party?_

Louis freezes, _who the hell is Nick?_ He can’t remember a Nick from last year. He doesn’t get the chance to answer, because Cow-hell is already walking towards him, squinting his eyes. Louis quickly scrunches up the paper and passes it into his sleeve, making it disappear. “I’d recommend you listen, Mr. Tomlinson. We wouldn’t want those grades to slip!” He turns away with a mischievous quirk on his lips. Louis stares daggers into the back of his head, _just you watch, soon I will be switching out of this class!_ Louis was hoping that his discussion with Mr. Corden would let him switch out of Management and into Drama. He hadn’t heard from him, granted he only made the request yesterday. Louis was hoping he could go to his class during break, but apparently he had to go get his ear’s chewed out about something at the headmasters. _Or is he going to talk to me about switching? That’ll be grand._

_“_ So are you going to come?” Jade asks him, while she stuffs her laptop into her bag. 

“Who the hell is Nick? Never heard of the lad!” Louis asks. 

“He used to go here three years ago, now he’s in Liverpool, studying something with media and communications. He’s home for the week, uni starts a week later than college.” 

“That sa?” Louis can’t deny or affirm. He hasn’t had older siblings that went through the university process, so he really can’t tell.

“You coming or not?” Jade asks while they pass Cow-hell’s desk in the front of the class.

_Good-bye motherfucker_ , Louis thinks. “Sure. Sounds mint.” Jade nods in agreement, clearly pleased. 

Louis walks into the western corridor of the college, towards the offices. As it turns out, Louis is not the only one waiting for the headmaster. Harry is sitting on one of the benches just outside his bureau. He’s leaning forward, his cross stuck between his rabbit teeth and the chain dangling from his exposed neck. He’s typing away at his phone, which looks tiny in his big hands, compared to Louis who has the same phone. His phone usually feels like a brick in his hand. It took him forever to learn to type with his thumb while holding on to the phone at the same time. Louis sits down, leaving one seat free between them. “What’d ye do?” Louis asks him.

Harry looks up and it seems like he’s only noticed Louis now. “Got into a fight with someone.” As he speaks the cross falls from his lips and finds its place dangling from his neck. 

“Ye got in a fight?” Louis asks, astonished.

Harry hums, “just some idiots calling me a fag again.” He says it so nonchalant like it were nothing.

“Shit, I thought tha’ ended.” Louis flicks his fringe back and forth. 

Harry shrugs, “the name-calling never stops.” 

Louis mindlessly grabs Harry’s arm. Harry shivers at the touch, “they don’t hurt ye no more right?” 

“Nah.” Harry shakes his head and slowly removes the hand from his arm. “Thanks to you, they don’t. Headmaster just going to chew me out about the dress code,” he points down at himself, as it is his signature look by now, his dress shirt is open to his midriff, “you know make it look like he’s being fair about this whole fighting thing, when he knows he can’t hurt me. Not after last year.” 

Louis takes back his hand into his other, “good, that’s good.” _I used to be able to just pull up a wall, where are they now? Leaving me so open, so defenceless against_ him _._

“Why are you here?” Harry asks irritated, there are no signs of a fight on him, nor is he holding a slip from a teacher, complaining of Louis foul mouth. Because Louis does have that at times, quite spiteful and hurtful when he wants to be.

“Dunno, really. Maybe, ‘cause I’m’a try ta transfer to Drama Class.” Louis shrugs trying to maintain his composure and nervous.

“Really?” Curiosity takes over in Harry’s body and trumps his demise over the blue-eyes boy. He turns his body to his, “didn’t know that was your thing.”

“Used to do it in Donny, but here I thought it’d be perceived wrong, so I didn’t do it.” Louis looks back at his hands, looking lost without holding something, someone. 

“That changed?” Harry’s confusion rises. Louis is becoming more and more an enigma to him. 

“Don’t think I give a shit no more.” Louis says honestly.

“How is that?” Harry watches him carefully, not moving an inch, as if he were holding a breath.

“You.” Louis says. Harry’s green eyes bore into him and Louis can’t tell what he is thinking. 

“Tomlinson!” They both startle, someone had left the bureau, leaving the headmaster’s office open, allowing him to scream at the people outside in the hallway waiting for their turn. “You’re up, Tomlinson” 

“Sure.” Louis stands up, gives Harry a smile “bye.”

“Bye.” Harry says.

As soon as the door shuts, Louis wants to go back out. Take Harry by the hand, get into Bertie and drive anywhere but here. Get his precious boy out of this hate-forsaken place. Protect him from all evil like Tarzan and keep him from all envy, slay that dragon like Prince Charming in Shrek. But he can’t. “Mr. Tomlinson, please sit.” Louis shakes himself and sits down in the seat that Harry used to occupy during their truce with Ashton and Calum. “Good to see that you are here out of better circumstances this time.” Higgins smiles. 

Louis makes a pained expression “sure.” 

Higgins holds back a laugh, “Mr. Corden has spoken on your behalf and has informed me that you are wanting to switch classes to Drama, is that right?” 

“Yes. I really want to do Drama. It might be somethin' I want to study at Uni. I need this on me application.” Louis chatters down the points he had prepared in his head. “I did Drama in Donny, I was good too. Look at the transcript. Last year, last year I wanted to do that too, but this college wouldn’t let me, told me that all classes were full. But they are not, are they? I can switch! I want to switch, please…”

“Alright, calm yourself, Tomlinson, please.” Higgins has leaned back in his chair and is watching him with amusement. 

“Sir, all do respect, this is my future, I can’t stay calm.” Louis says overly dramatic.

“Already practising, are you?” Higgins seems to have noticed too. “I am prepared to allow you to switch. It’s early enough in the year, for you to do so. You won’t have missed much the last forty-eight hours.”

“GRAND!” Louis screams, throwing his hands in the air.

“Mr. Tomlinson, as much as I appreciate your happiness and willingness to show me your dramatics, please refrain from doing so in my office.” 

“Sorry.” Louis snickers.

“As I was saying,” Higgins shuffles a few papers, to mask the fact that he has to force himself to remember what he had said last. “Uh… right… I can let you get into Drama if you drop one other class.”

“Management! I don’t want to see Cowell again,” Louis says too fast, he quickly adds “Sir.”

“As much as I am inclined to agree, off the books of course, to your inclination with _Mr_. Cowell.” He gives him a pointed look for the appropriate title, _like that’s anything special, to be called Mr. Get a Dr. and I’ll be impressed, dick face._ “Management, you cannot drop. You will have to drop another one of your more dreamy classes.”

“Wha’ does that mean?” Louis squints his eyes.

“Art. Mr Tomlinson, you will have to drop art.” Louis look at his hands, Jade was in Art with him, so was Zayn and Leigh-Anne. With some miracle he had passed the class last year, Mrs Horlyck said it was mostly his vision for their last project of drawing a feeling. But he liked her, she was fair to him and giving up on that relationship seems foolish. How does he know that his grades will be as good with Corden as with her? The issue he was having, though, is that he can simply not draw! Drama he can do. He looks back up at his headmaster. “Alright. I’ll do it!” 

“Good.” Higgins is shuffling again. He pulls out a paper with triumph “ha! There it is, I need you to give this to your mother and have her sign this.”

“Mum has to sign this?”

“Yes, of course. You think I’d let one of my students do something this important behind their parents’ back?” 

“Of course not.” Louis shakes his head in faux irritation. 

“Good, now shoo.” He wiggles the paper towards Louis. “Have it in by Monday.” 

“Sure thing, Sir.” He salutes and hurries outside. “STYLES get in here now!”

Harry stood up once he saw Louis with a smile on his face jump out of the bureau. “Have to drop art.” Louis grins, he looks into Harry’s unwavering stern expression. “But I got it! I can switch.”

“Styles!”

“Sounds good. See you around.” Harry says less cold than intended, unable to hide his little skip of the heart he had felt from the joy of the older boy. Harry hurries to get into the office, but gets stuck with his blazer on the doorhandles. “Oopsie.” He awkwardly shuffles to free himself, his face burning up.

Louis smirks, shaking his head. Belated he realises _Oops is the first word he ever said to me._ Harry doesn't remember in that moment, his head filled with the embarrassment of _still_ being that clumsy. He had hoped to have outgrown the clumsy stages of his growth spurt from last year. 

Louis arrives at the back-to-school-party at Nick’s house with Eleanor on his arm, and Liam on his other side. Danielle was going to meet them there. Liam was all shaky and huffy about her finally coming out to see him. “Just a question, why does Danielle’s Uni start earlier than Nicks?”

“Because Danielle is going to a Dance Academy and not a University.” Liam says. 

“Right.” Louis moves down the pavement, “it’s great she could come.” 

“She’s trying to make an effort.” Liam says.

“Hey ya!” Louis sees Jade climb out of a pickup. 

“Let’s crack on.” Louis says once Jade has reached them, she is wearing a green shimmering one piece. The name above the doorbell says _Grimshaw_ in cursive letters, but the door is open, so they simply push in. The Grimshaw’s are on the more wealthy side with a large floor plan, the entrance reaches a big living room, which is sweating with people. Louis sees Calum in the mass of people, and he thinks he might have seen Jesy too. 

“Jesy here?” Louis asks Jade. 

“What the fuck are you doing?” Perrie’s shrill voice cuts through Louis’ eardrum. Jade doesnt answer Louis but turns to beam a smile at Perrie.

“Comin’ to a party, nice t’ see ye too, love pants.” Louis chortles.

“Hi Tommo, looking lovely.” Perrie kisses his cheek and Louis tries not to notice how much taller she is. “I’m talking to her.” She points to Jade, who has a slight sheen of pink blushing her nose. 

“Haven’t done nothing, pet.” Jade says.

“Told you not to wear that in public.” Jade looks down at her outfit, and blushes.

“Why? Looks gorgeous love.” Eleanor says, and Jade gives Louis a heated look. He grabs El around her waist and pushes her around the two to walk towards the kitchen. 

“What ye want babe?” Eleanor shrugs, looking around, her hand constantly in her hair, to comb her hair with her hands. Today she hasn’t made the effort to curl it for Louis, but rather left it lying limp to her side. Louis grabs some tequila and mixes it with pineapple juice. 

“NICK!” Eleanor is waving at the boy. His thin and lanky with his brown hair blow dried into the air. Louis subconsciously ruffles his caramel fringe.

“There is a new quiff on the block!” Louis mocks the boy approaching. But Nick doesn’t seem to be interested in saying hello to them, he leans against the kitchen door to talk to blonde died hair and curls. _Shit_ , Louis was hoping to have some quiet minutes to get properly intoxicated in order to face the younger boy.

“Oh is that Harry?” Eleanor unhelpfully asks, it causes Louis to pour to much tequila into his own glass. Nick is pointing at El now, Niall and Harry turn around to them. His beautiful puffy lips turn downwards. He’s dressed in tight black pants that look like they are glued onto his wonky legs, and his birds aren’t covered by a white silk blouse with ruffles on the neckline. He could swear it would hang in the female side of a department store. But he looks gorgeous as ever, the curls looking softer than ever before. _What would I do to be able to run my hands through them, untangle some strays from each other._

“Hey El!” Quiff-boy takes her into his arms, Louis had not notice them approaching. Louis takes a huge gulp of his drink, he immediately sniffs his nose, _ugh disgusting, too much alc._ Nick’s hands spread over Eleanor’s back to roughly stroke her. His fingers are so long and crooked, they almost look like bird feet.

“This is Louis!” Eleanor introduces him, while she grabs her drink.

“Your boyfriend?” Nick holds out his hand to Louis.

“Something like that.” Eleanor does not elaborate.

“Wha’ yer name?” Louis asks once Nick’s freakish hands leave his.

“Nick.”

“Oh cool name. I used to have a fish named Nick. My sisters cat toppled its little bowl and it fell to the floor. It was still alive, twitching weirdly, until me mum flushed it down the toilet. Me sister thought it was cool, she still believed in Nemo. Still cool name, brov.”

“Thanks?” Nick says weirdly amused, Harry on the other hand looks offended. Niall laughs as usual. 

“Oi Niall?” Louis addresses him, Niall had been able to slip away whenever Louis wanted to approach him the last forty-eight hours. “How’s it been?”

“Great thanks.” 

“Good summer?” Louis asks.

“Yeah, was alright. Went to see my mum in Mullingar.” He downs the rest of his bier.

“Good old Ireland, aye?” Louis says, when Liam approaches him.

“Yeah.” He nods. “Was good. So my brother too. He got engaged.” 

“Holy shit, that amazing.” Danielle says, hearts in her eyes. Louis is reminded of the proposal that he had witnessed in Ibiza.

“We thought so yeah.” Niall beams at her.

“How was Spain?” Liam asks Harry, taking a stand next to Louis on the opposite side of the small kitchen table, which Louis was using to prepare drinks. “Make me one please.” He adds to Louis. Louis starts working while he awaits Harry’s answer.

“Was in Turkey actually.” Harry’s deep voice raises above the loud music. Louis thinks of the screenshot of Harry in tiny yellow shorts still saved into his album on his phone. He can feel his cheeks going hot from the memory of wanking to it one to many times.

“Oh right? Sorry thought you were in Spain.” Liam says, trying to nudge Louis, who is listening already. 

“Nah, but it was good. I played volleyball almost every day.” Niall randomly starts laughing. “…with a german family.” 

“Right.” Louis says mindlessly.

“And I like, learned how to…” He holds up his hands on eye level and wiggles them up and down like elevators, “score in german. “

“Ye learned how to score Germans? That what yer sayin’ Harry?” Louis taunts, the alcohol finally getting into his blood stream, getting back his sass.

“Excellent, no idea that was going there.” Liam laughs, arms spread, silently fishing for his girlfriend. Danielle rolls her eyes but let’s him put his arms around her. 

“Such a child.” She whispers into his ear. _That’s rich talking to the daddy of the group._

“No, I didn’t either.” Nick says, his voice getting a little annoyed.

Harry starts smiling to himself, picking at his fingernails. Louis slides the glass of cocktail to Liam. “Watch’a studyin’ again?” Louis asks Nick.

“Communication and Media at Liverpool.” Nick answers. His arm sneaks around Harry’s waist and pulls him against himself. Harry’s cheeks heat up, he swirls out of his grasp with an eye-roll. 

“Ye any good?” Louis asks through gritted teeth.

Nick shrugs, “actually mostly like doing the student radio show. Quite good at that, mate.” 

“You might do radio then?” Danielle asks, seemingly happy she can talk about someone’s future. Liam tries not to look to hurt when Danielle rounds the table to be able to talk to Nick better. 

Louis grabs some shot glasses and fills them all to the brim with tequila, he’s trying to watch his intake today, not to mix too many different alcohols together. Slowly he slides every glass over to his friends, starting with Liam and ending with Nick, which effectively ends all their conversations. Louis launches his shot glass into the air, making a toast he calls “to rattle snakes and condoms, two things I don’t fuck with.” Harry rolls his eyes.

“Hear. Hear.” Liam laughs, and they down the glasses, there is no more lemon left nor does Louis see any salt. Harry scrunches up his nose in disgust. 

“Ye don’t drink?” Louis asks the pretty face. He only shakes his head, his hands clenching behind his back, there is a little bit of fear in the movement. Niall, who’s leaning back a bit, sees it and quickly grabs for a distraction. Louis and Harry’s awkward stare off ends with Niall holding up a blunt. 

“Anyone?” 

“Oi Oi!” Louis laughs.

“Take it outside boys.” Nick says, pointing to the back porch. Louis, Liam, and Niall start walking, Louis sees Harry’s reluctance to come with them. 

“Ye not comin’?” Louis asks him, hand reaching out to him, but not touching him quite yet.

“I’m not a drug person.” Harry says, shaking his head. Briefly, Louis remembers the way Harry had coughed in the kitchen cabinet when he tried his first blunt with Zayn and Louis. Harry had leaned forward and coughed ridiculously, and Louis had squatted down next to him to rub his back, calling him baby. His stomach flip flops at the memory, and he tries to scold his gut to calm. 

“Not even pot?” Liam asks. Harry shakes his head again, slightly uncomfortable under the intense stare of the others.

“Ye sure?” Louis tries again, _maybe a little pot would loosen him up, so that he’ll talk to me._ “I feel like that could relax ye.” He gives him a wink for good measure. But Harry stays adamant and turns to talk to Nick again. Jealousy seers through Louis, “God, I need a hit!” 

Liam chuckles into his ear, when they find their way out of the kitchen, leaving Danielle and Eleanor to gossip together by themselves. They walk into the backyard, past the sweaty bodies that are drawn to each other in a frantic jump that is modern dancing. Louis thinks he sees Calum in there, as well as Jade and Perrie. 

“It’s your blunt you should take the first hit.” Liam says. Of course, proper etiquette dictates the guests get the first hit, but Liam obviously does not know that. Niall puts it between his lips, Louis leans forward to light it. Liam is watching how the warm light fans over Louis face, casting shadows across his cheeks, meanwhile Niall takes his first breath. 

“Thanks Tommo.” Niall says reluctantly, waters still unclear between the two of them. Niall passes it over to Liam. Louis realises it’s only the three of them, and all three of them know what happened between Harry and Louis. Nerves seer up his arm, leaving goosebumps in its wake, _shit_. All of a sudden the backyard seems too empty and too full at the same time. There are four girls snickering at the other side, all lower-sixth-form girls, from Harry’s term. And a couple is snogging against the only tree. Louis takes a deep intake when the weed passes to him. 

“Haven’t seen ye in a while.” Louis confesses. 

“I know.” Niall is clearly a happy person, but Louis is getting hit by his rare cold anger. The protective side, which stands up for his friends. “Have been too busy drying tears since then.” Louis feels the sting of the words travel through his body. 

“I told ‘im I want him!” Louis says. He takes a hit, while Liam shuffles against the fence, eyes wide in shock. 

“You’re going to discuss this here?” Liam whisper shouts to him, discomfort written over his face. 

“Why not?” Niall asks, taking the blunt from Louis’ cold fingers. Smoke leaves Louis nose in streams like a train. “You hurt him, and you continue to hurt him. Isn’t it natural for him to protect himself?”

“I’m not with Eleanor.” Louis clarifies. 

“Yeah I could see that mate.” Niall sneers, Liam coughed from the frantic pull he had taken.

“Honest. Just on paper.” Louis faces Niall.

“Even if that were true, don’t make it better, mate.” Niall says.

“I don’t want to hurt ‘im Ni.” Louis says, looking around to see if the girls or the couple are listening to him. They are not. “I really wish ye’d know me better than that!” 

“As much fun as you are, Louis, I’ll always watch out for Harry.” Niall points to the girls, “You’re a coward. Harry’s my best friend. I don’t like seeing him with an egotistical narcissistic fuck of a coward.” Louis deflates. He wishes he could stand taller, straighten his spine and shout something back. _But how can I? When he’s right!_ “I told’m as much!” Niall stomps away, bumping his shoulder against Louis’. 

“Fucked that up!” Louis says falling against the fence next to Liam. His eyes are blown, from the nervous hits he had been taking the last three minutes. Louis snatches the rest of the pot cigarette in his hand, “think ye had enough mate.” 

“That was awful.” Liam says, his eyes rolling in his sockets. Louis takes the last hit. “Never seen Niall this way before.” 

Louis waits for the smoke to leave through his nostrils before he answers, “don’t kna what to do.” They stand, leaning against the fence, for another ten minutes, body chilled from the cold with the wind picking up. The girls leave quickly, giggling while they pursue their crushes. A long exasperated sigh leaves Louis’ body.

Liam looks at him, their eyes lock. A silent conversation passes between the two and Louis couldn’t ask for a better friend. Nine months ago, Louis had hated Liam and his obnoxious nature, and now he couldn’t tell how he’d survive without him. And Liam, he’s just as protective over Louis as Niall is over Harry. There is a deeply rooted thankfulness for having found a friend. Louis can’t imagine how lonely Liam’s life was before Louis showed up. After a long moment he asks “dance?” 

“Yeah!” Liam says, his face clearing up. They don’t need to thank each other, they just know what they feel for each other. _No need to embrace each other by saying it_ , Louis thinks.

“BABYYYY!” Danielle calls for Liam, once they reached the living room. She has clearly drunken too much, folding her arms around Liam's neck. She forces Liam and Louis to join the group that they were with a moment ago. She was dancing with Barbara and Eleanor, Eleanor mechanically grips for Louis and slots him behind herself, so that she could grind against him. Barbara was securely hooked into Harry’s and Niall’s side, she had gotten thinner and her hair, she had curled further than she used to. There was also Jade and Perrie, who at this point start going _low low low_ together. Their legs rubbing against each other in a scissoring position while they squat over the dance floor. The earlier argument about Jade’s one piece forgotten.

Louis starts dancing with Eleanor, swaying with her easily like an old habit. Harry bores stares at the girl, which doesn’t go unnoticed by Louis, _do I still have a chance?_ But the little hope he had disappears when he sees a colourful arm snake around Harry’s tiny waist. _God his waist, even I, with me wee fingers could hold him together by his waist._ “Hey!” A high-pitched loud shrill comes from the colourful-arm person. It’s Taylor, the fucking mascot from last year. Harry grins at her. His attention shifting from Eleanor to Taylor. He grabs her by her middle and manhandles her, _ye can man handle me all ye want love,_ so that she is stuck to his front. He gives her a kiss on the cheek, while they start dancing together. 

Much like the school disco, Taylor completely lets go and leans against Harry easily. Her arms snake around Harry’s neck. “Gettin’ a drink.” Louis whispers into Eleanor’s ear. Her eyes follow his line of sight toward Harry.

“You sure? Don’t want ye to get smashed and sick.” She sounds genuine.

“I wan’ ‘o get mortal!” Louis answers and stumbles back to the kitchen. _TEQUILA! There’s me love, come hither me sweet creature of intellect._ He laughs to himself, grabs the neck of the bottle and takes a large swig. He looks back to Harry, where Taylor is trying to chase his lips, almost hitting him like a pigeon with her beak or a dog smelling for a fart. _If they were kissing, I ain’t wan’ o see that! Thank fuck for Tequila, me love._ The voice inside his head sings to him. 

He staggers back to Eleanor and sneaks an arm around her, giving her left tit a squeeze. She turns to him like she wants to slap him, but she sees his red eyes, the frowning face and the drunken sweat forming on his collarbone. Instead, she kisses him on the corner of his mouth. “Alright?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Louis belittles the statement.

“Tell me if you ‘ought to leave, yeah?” Louis nods, wraps his arms around her and berries his face in between her shoulder blades. He breathes in the familiar scent of horse and cherries. It’s soothing, like he has his partner in crime on his side. He’s smaller than her, when he looks up he barely looks over her right shoulder, when he sees Harry looking at him. His greens darkened by rage. Their eyes stay locked together for a while, until there is another hand on Harry’s precious thin waist. Nick stands flush against Harry’s bum. Harry’s head falls onto Nick’s shoulder and his nose scrunches up in a happy giggle. Taylor, defeated deflates from Harry’s side. His long finger’s leaving her side, she falls forward, forgotten. With a displeased face, she strides off to her friends, the four girls from the backyard. _Dear Lord, don’t let them have overheard!_ Louis prays in his mind.

Eleanor and Danielle are facing each other, when they shimmy toward each other. Both their boys attached to their backs, share a look and an eye-roll, _girls._ Louis can feel bile rising up his throat when he sees Nick bite at Harry’s sharp-cut jaw. _So that’s why ye don’t want me any more. Not dating girls, dating Nick!_ Pain travels through his gut, shooting fireballs at his butterflies. Dead they transpire agony that fills his stomach, if he could only burp it away. 

Louis detaches from Eleanor, “sweating me bullock off.” He says and hurriedly stumbles towards the loo. The attached hallway, behind the kitchen leads to a row of people standing in line for the bathroom. Still clutching the tequila bottle, Louis skips past them. He tries to open multiple doors, some are locked, others are in use by people having sex or receiving blow jobs. Louis would stop to stare at the boy’s cocks, but that would leave the wrong impression, so he hurries further. On the second floor, he finally finds an empty room. There’s a bed in there, but his blurry vision can’t take in too much of his surroundings.

He feels tears asking for permission to climb into his eyes, but Louis takes a swig from the tequila. The sting is strong enough to hold the tears at bay for a moment or two, at the same time it doesn’t hold the punch it did in the beginning of the night. Every time he feels like crying he takes a sip. Within 5 min he finishes the entire body, still he does not feel better.

The door opens and Liam walks, “hey mate…”

“Stop. Nip off.” Louis doesn’t want to hear his sympathetic voice. He’s done feeling like shit today. He’s already had one chewing out from a friend, _I don’t need another_.

Liam stands in the middle of the bedroom looking lost, he decides to re-adjust his line of questioning. “Wow! You found Nick’s bedroom and didn’t destroy anything. I’m proud.”

“This is Nick’s room?” Liam nods. Louis sees Harry’s jaw in-between Nick’s teeth again. A green dragon reappears in his stomach, gnawing at him, he sees red. Louis stands up and smashes the empty bottle against the glass-bowled night stand. Under a loud clash it falls to pieces underneath the small table.

“Holy shit!” Liam complains. Louis chest is heaving. “Feel better?”

“Not really.” Louis says, “maybe little.”

“Try something else, how about this chair?” Louis falls to the side when he tries to reach the chair. His vision isn’t all too clear, and his mouth tastes stale from all the alcohol. _Maybe I need some water._ He quickly finds his tumbling footing again and presses past Liam. Louis grabs the chair by the backrest and smashes it onto of the bed, it simply bounces off. He rearranges so that the seat crashes down on the bedpost, the chair splinters, and throws the last chair leg against one of the windows, a small piece of glass from the casement window shatters. The cold air flows through the room and chills Louis bones. Frustrated he pulls his fingers through his fringe. He sighs. 

“Better?”

“Much! Yeah, thanks mate.” Liam nods, his eyes trained on the broken window piece. Louis’ guess is that he’s calculating the cost. “Oi, Payno. Get out of here, don’t want ye around this.” Louis’ point to the window.

“ ‘ts fine.” Liam shrugs, his eyes glistering suddenly. “My first time.” He giggles. _Right, Liam doesn’t do this stuff often. Well, neither do I, I suppose._

“What the fuck are you doing in here?”Harry is standing within the door frame. His curls are waving in the breeze that is pressing through the broken window and there is a thin sheen of sweat glimmer on his exposed pecks. _He looks more beautiful than ever._ Louis swallows hard, when Harry finally settles his eyes on him, after having inspected the bedside table, the wooden splinters near the bed and the shattered tiny window. “What the actual fuck Louis?”

“Was my idea.” Liam says, lamely raising his hand like he’s in class. _Wanker._

“As if I’m going to believe that you did this!” Harry growls. His hands are clenching at his sides, and he’s slightly leaning forward. “Fuck off, Liam. Give us a sec.” 

After assuring the decision with a look from Louis, Liam scurries past Harry and closes the door behind them. There’s a tremble passing through Louis’ bones. He’s not been this scared in a long time. He turns his shocked round eyes on Harry. “Liam. He told me to smash the chair, I kna ye doesn’t believin’ me. But it’s true. Honest. Just so angry.” Louis growls, holding out his palms to his own face, like he’s reading a book. “Ye look at me… I kna ‘ve lost this battle, darlin’. I kna…” He looks up at Harry, hate and love battling inside him.

Harry didn’t notice Louis was talking, stuck in his own head. “What?”

“Ye listenin’ Styles?” Louis taunts, anger flaring too. _Why pore out me heart if he ain’t listening._

On instinct Harry deflects, recoiling from the sorrow thrown his way by Louis “Look at this mess. Who’s going to pay for this?” He points past Louis to the window, which seemed to be the biggest disaster in the room.

“Really don’t think he’s gonna kna who was in ‘ere?” Louis asks, rounding the bed to face Harry.

“That’s right you’re just going to bugger off, it's what you are good at. Innit? As long as you don't have to take responsibility for your actions, you just fuck off, like always.” Hurt drips through the pain.

Louis swallows harshly, _can Harry hear it from across the room?_ “I came back for ye!”

But Harry has had enough of this, he won’t stand here and listen to Louis ramble on again about him being his play thing. Instead, he pours all of his desperation, anger and agony into his next words. “You take nothing serious! You got to take responsibility, Louis. You half-arse everything and you get through with it. Well not with this.” He points between the two of them.

“How dare ye say tha’?” Louis blinks rapidly, he presses his fingertips together like a cone and painfully thrusts them against his heart. “How dare ye judge how I deal with this!”

“I’m not…” Harry defends.

“Yer all I want.” Louis cries out, he’s gesticulating with his hands, freely flopping them about.

“Clearly not.” Harry says. “How can I believe that, after your display out there?”

“Because I came back ta ye, ‘nd you blew me off. _ME_!” Louis screams. He’s feeling cursed, stuck on a loop of saying the same things over and over again. He wishes he could dive into Harry’s brain and save the message into his hard drive.

“Are you for real? Of course I didn’t want to be your little side piece.” Harry’s equally mad.

“Ye broke me ‘eart.” Louis defends himself. Everything feels dizzy.

“Louis!” Harry rips at his arm to make him face him, Louis can barely see him vision getting blurry. “You broke my heart more times than I can count, was it three, four or five? Probably more than 10!” Harry’s voice leaves drums of quakes in Louis’ body, shaking him to his core. “Because your heart and body told you to come to me, to find me, to be with me and only me!” Harry has tears welling in the corner of his eyes, which Louis can’t see, because his vision is becoming too blurry from the tequila. “But your fucking brain always comes between us. All you care about is what they think.” He points behind himself, probably indicating all the people outside at the party. “Your ego fucking with who you are and what you want.” 

“Ah can’t fix tha’.” Louis says, weak. The hand on his arm burning him.

“You always can fix yourself. Just have to want to.” Louis can hear some desperation in the accusation. It makes his blood boil, _not everyone can be like Harry, not everyone is that_ brave _._

“Ye kna all answers, don’t ye? Ev’rythin’ just flies ta ye. ‘e can’t fix me. ‘ome of us, can’t be li’ ye. ‘ome of us can’t change that quick.” Louis rips his arms free and stumbles out of the bedroom. There’s an arm that holds him tight by the waist. He doesn’t know who it is and in the morning he won’t remember anything that happens next.

He won’t remember how Harry carried him into Liam’s car. How Harry gave him a kiss on the forehead, while Louis was rolling himself into a ball of misery, crying endlessly, cheeks red and blotchy from the tears. He won’t remember his mother opening the door for Liam, helping him up the stairs and cuddling him like a koala. He won’t remember his mothers tears mixing with his, asking him what’s wrong, how she missed him being so sad. He won’t remember her singing him a lullaby or the way he ranches into the bucket next to his bed. And in the morning he will wonder why his mother is in his bed, he’ll ask what happened and his mother will kiss his cheeks.

His mother is worried, he can feel it. Louis already emptied his stomach for the fifth time this morning. He feels exhausted and his eyes sting from the tears that build there when the ranches become painful. Jay comes back into his room with Louis’ favourite Yorkshire tea, she sits down next to him. Caressing his wet fringe, he’d just taken a shower. “Does this have something to do with all yer question about love?”

Louis buries his face in his mother’s tummy and mumbles, “… doesn’t louve me mum.” Is all Jay understands. 

She coos to him. “Oh, ‘ow could she not love ye?” His mother thinks that they are talking about Eleanor, though all the talks about love do throw her for a loop a lot. A lot of things are just not adding up, in her opinion. The door barges open and two blonde-headed girls jump onto the bed. 

“Mummy, mummy!” Daisy squeals.

“Are you cryin’?” The other twin is leaning over Louis with a cocked head, trying to come face to face with Louis still lying in their mothers lap.

“No. Bugger off.” Louis wipes at his face with his jumper that he had pulled over his knuckles. 

“What ye need sweeties?” Jay asks, trying to re-arrange her children into civilised behaviour,

“Mum you said we could go mini-golfing. Dan ‘nd Lottie are ready downstairs. Let’s go!” Daisy throws her hands into the air. Phoebe is leaning into her side, and giggling while blinking her eyelashes rapidly at their mother. She probably doesn’t know what it means yet, that it’s used to seduce someone.

“Give me a minute.” Jay says calmly, while Dasiy grabs her hand to pull her off the bed.

“But ye said we’d do it today.” Daisy pouts, pulling harder.

“Just one minute Daisy. Now go downstairs, I’ll be there shortly. Now girls!” Jay shakes her head at the girl's behaviour. Daisy lets go of the arm and they jump of the bed.

Daisy stomps her foot like a true nine-year-old. They watch the identical girls link arms and stomp out of the room together. “Just go. I’m fine.” Louis says.

“Honey…” Louis’ mother disagrees.

“It’s fine, mum. ‘ave fun.” Louis loves all his sisters, but he never wanted to kill the twins more than now. He will never admit it, but he just needs his mum today. 

“Honey I can stay. They can do this on their own!” 

“No. Don’t want to take this from ‘em.” Louis disagrees with her. She leaves a fat kiss on his head, and with a last questioning look she watches her son grab his laptop to start some kind of distraction. He was so drunk last night, he can’t remember most of what happened, but everything he said to Harry and everything Harry said to him is clear as day in his mind. Their dialog ringing back and forth like a song. Everything in that room he remembers. 

The doorbell rings, Lottie opens the door to see Eleanor stand behind it. She awkwardly waves, with two Starbuck beverages in her hand. “Ye know he don’t like coffee right?” Lottie asks instead of a greeting.

“I know.” Eleanor frowns, she slips past Lottie. “He’s home then?”

“Yeah, upstairs.” Eleanor slips out of her expensive slippers and passes Jay to take the stairs. 

“Wait!” Jay calls, her heart clenches, she’s not going to let this girl into Louis’ room if she’s the one hurting him. “What are ye doing here?”

Eleanor looks confused, “I’m looking after Louis. He looked horrible when he got into the car last night.”

“Yeah but I wasn’t yer car, was it? Liam got here without ye. Ye left him alone last night!”

“I know,” Eleanor says, keeping the frustration out of her voice. Eleanor was sure that she was the last person Louis wanted in his presence last night. “He left the dance floor for a while and when he came back he was smashed. Nothing I could do.”

Jay’s eyebrows furrow “ye didn’t have a fight with ‘im, then?”

“Last night?” Eleanor asks, Jay nods. “No. We didn’t.” Eleanor didn’t actually know about the fight with Harry, she had thought that might have happened, but only this morning she got the whole story from Liam. Eleanor had been busy, blocking the bathroom for Jade and Perrie last night. She didn’t ask what they did in there, but it took quite a long time. She proudly noted to herself that she was getting better at secrets.

“I’m sure he’d love to see ye.” Jay says, and thinks _who the hell is hurting me child?_

Eleanor finds Louis curled up in his duvet, hair wet, in a large jumper that passes to his knees, and watching a Netflix show. She curls up behind him and spoons him, kissing the nape of his neck. They remain like that until night starts creeping in, at which point Eleanor switches places with Fizzy. “Have fun with Max.” Louis tells her, before she disappears through the door.

“Who’s Max?” Fizzy asks, slurping on a milkshake. She had just come home from a ‘sleep-over’ with her best friend Antonia. 

“Her lover.” Louis says earnestly. Fizzy coughs, the shake going down the wrong pipe. 

She stares at Louis, but he hasn’t moved, eyes glued to the screen. “That’s a story worth telling.”

“Maybe later.” Louis says, yawning. “Now it’s time to stop the wallowin’ don’t ye think?” Fizzy nods enthusiastically. “How about we make dinner, before the others come home?”

💚🍑💙

“All of you need to get this signed by your parents,” the teacher says in the front of the class. “It also reaffirms the amount of money this is going to cost you. Please have it in within the next ten days.” Louis looks down at the large number. How is he going to come up with that much money? Even if he doesn’t spend all his allowance, he’ll never get there in a few weeks. He sighs dramatically when he shoves it into his bag.

Louis is putting on his work-out clothes, when he feels eyes on him. One of the try-out guys is staring at him, he got a potato head, short hair and is about a head taller than Louis himself. “What ye want?” 

“Nothing! Just looking around, mate.” 

“Stop drooling pal.” Ashton laughs. “Girls changing room is on the other side of the pitch.” The homophobic teammates laugh as they follow Ashton. 

Calum trails behind “don’t worry about him. Show us what you can do, aye?” The new guy nods.

“I’m Joe.” He tells Louis, after he extended his hand. Joe is regaining colour to his face.

“Not all of us are pricks.” Louis grins and gives him a clap on the back. “What the hell are we talkin’ about?” Louis asks when he joins running laps with the boys on the pitch.

“We were talking about gays.” 

“Oh?” Liam inquires, slowing down to keep pace with Calum.

“I was just expressing my honest opinion.” Ashton says. His face clearly scrunched in disgust. 

“It is what it is,” Louis says, trying to end the topic as quick as possible.

“Just don’t want any of them stalking me in the showers.” Ashton shivers.

“Oi, think there’s better options than sneak a peak at ye.” Louis says. “Not that impressive, mate.” 

“Here we go again…” Ashton rolls his eyes.

“Oi!” Louis holds up his hands, cocked head and shuffling sideways next to Ashton on his feet. Amusement clear on his face when he taunts Ash, “we’ve seen the picture, mate.” 

“T’ be fair, you’re not that impressive either.” Ashton smiles at him. 

“Been peaking at me ‘ave ye?” Louis lets out a nasal snicker. He can see Ashton’s face contort, “Oh chill out.” Louis is amused from the confidence of the other boy. But Ashton’s had enough, he runs forward to attack Louis. Louis’ still faster and smaller, so he sprints off, leaving his laugh calling over the pitch.

“ALRIGHT! Come here!” Coach’s voice saves Louis any actual confrontation with Ashton. He sneaks his way into the huddle. “Welcome to try-outs everyone. As you know three people left, so we have three lads here to come and try out: Joe.” Potato head waves awkwardly. “Danny.” A short boy lifted his hands, much more comfortable than Joe. “John.” A guy with thick black hair nods. “Let’s start.”

They did some dribbling tasks and one-on-one passing drills. Before they prepare for a small scrimmage, Liam is being a nerd and talking to the new boys, so Louis throws some of his water in his face. Liam splatters hilariously, which causes them to be on opposite teams. The new boy Joe is good, really good, he’s probably the best of the new intakes. But from the look of Coach Winston, he’s pretty sure all of them will be allowed to join. Passing the ball back and forth with Ashton, Louis outplays Liam and nails the ball into net. “Beat it bitch!” Louis screams. Liam is clearly disappointed, kicking at a patch of grass. Louis takes a look at Liam, whose still holding eye contact with him. Louis grins and runs over to the benches, he grabs his water bottle and runs over to Liam, dumping it over his head. He giggles like the twins when Liam rolls his eyes. 

“You’ve done it now man!” Liam runs over to his own water bottle, uncapping it while he’s on his way toward him. He prematurely starts throwing water towards Louis, but he can always duck down in the right moment, the water easily sprays over and past him. 

“Everyone gather around, lads stop that.” Liam and Louis walk over, but Liam’s eyes are twinkling now. He is a sucker for unruliness. “First game is in five weeks, lads. We looking good right now, but I want to look sharp. Understood?”

“Yes, Sir.” Liam strides over to Niall and whispers something to him. Niall looks over Liam’s shoulder to Louis and grins.

“When will you announce captains, coach?” Dan asks.

“The week before the first game.”

“Which is?” Ashton asks, winking at Louis.

“18th of October, we’re playing the Bradford Cannons. Their good, but we can be better, if you all would concentrate a bit more.” Liam takes a stand next to Louis again. Ashton is pointing at him, grabbing an imaginative noose and pulling it up, letting his eyes roll back and his tongue flop out of his mouth. Louis raises his thumb and index finger, and play shoots him. He feels something wed running down his leg. He stares down, Liam is grinning while poring Niall’s water bottle out on Louis left leg. 

Louis takes Joe’s water bottle out of his loose hand. The new-by looks lost when he stares back at Louis. But he only grins sweetly and pours the consistency over Liam with a backhand flip. When it’s empty, Louis throws it at Liam’s face, he moans from the impact on his temple. He’s got a red spot now, and Liam is chuckling into his fist while holding his temple at the same time. Louis snickers through his nose again. “Damn it lads, listen up.” Both Liam and Louis grin. “Fuck’s sake, hit the showers.” Liam and Louis both bolt into the changing room. Louis manages to neatly tuck Liam into a headlock. Under the cheers of the rest of the team, he pulls him into the showers. He lets the spray hit Liam, who is squirming and laughing. Louis eventually lets him go, because he’s getting wet too. When he can look back at Liam’s face he’s smiling just as much as himself.

Louis leaves the showers with his towel around his hips. Niall is standing on one of the benches and calls attention to himself. Louis notices that Ashton and his homophobic pricks have already left. “Ey lads! I'm havin’ a birthday party tahmorrow, at my house. Bring booze.” With a bit of delay and a confused face, he adds “… and food!” 

“That’s class brov.” Dougie shouts. 

“Does that include me?” Joe asks. 

Niall shrugs, “yeah why the 'ell not!” Niall’s accent had got thicker since he returned home from Ireland. Louis gets dressed and ignores the excited chatter from the new-by’s and the party planning from the older boys. 

“You going to go?” Liam asks.

“Don’t think sa.” Louis whispers back. “Give Harry a night out without a fight with me, ye kna?”

“Right.” Liam doesn’t argue further. By the crease in his brow, there is obviously something he wants to say, but he keeps that to himself. 

“Doubt Niall really want me there.”

“Come off it. He likes you. As long as you are up for ton of fun, he likes you. That’s Niall’s whole charm, you know? He’s just trying to be cold for Harry.”

“Well, he’s good at it.” Louis sips up his bag. “See ye tomorrow Payno.” He’s about to leave when he turns again. “Hold on, ye don’t ‘ave a car yet?” 

“No.” Liam says.

“I’ll give ye a lift, come on.” Liam’s face brightens.

Louis is still staring at the permission slip for the excursion in November.  _£_ _250_. He breathes in, harsh and deep, before standing up and tip toeing downstairs. Maybe his mother has some extra cash, some that wasn’t devoured by the wedding. He can hear Jay and step-father quietly talking. “I just don’t know what’s happening with him.”

“He knows he can come to you with anything.” Dan says.

“Doesn’t it make me a bad mother? Shouldn’t I be the one talking to him, not the other way around?”

“I…” Dan hesitates, “I’ve talked to the boy. He’s going through something.”

“OH God.” Jay cries out. 

“Honey, it’s nothing bad. He just has to get through the teens. No boy is going to do that holding on to their mummy’s hand.”

“That’s mean.” 

Dan laughs, “can we retire this now. We had the same discussion for the last week.” 

“I kna, I kna, I just worry about all me babies.” 

“I know my love.” Dan sighs heavily, “it’s just I have my own problems. After Doctor Clyde quit, don’t know how I am going to lure anyone out here for a bad paying job?” _Bad paying job!_ _Louis ye dumb son of a bitch, that’s the answer!_ Louis runs back upstairs into his room. _Mum and Dan can keep saving up for whatever, and Louis can make his own money._ He looks up CV’s on the internet and slowly starts making his own. It takes him hours to get everything just right, half midnight he finally falls into his cushions. There are 12 CVs securely tugged into his backpack. 

“You really not coming to Niall’s?” Eleanor asks.

“No.” Louis says, patting his back with the CVs. “Got somethin’ else to do.”

“All night?”

“El!” Louis warns.

“We’ll if you’re not going for me, you might want to go for Liam.” She readjusts her high ponytail. 

“He has plenty people there.” Louis closes the locker behind him, and they walk over to the art wing. Liam is friends with Harry after all.

“Danielle declined his invitation, she’d rather go to a party in London than see him.” Louis feels the pang of guilt in his heart.

“Damn.” 

“Yeah, I don’t think their doing too well.” Louis is shortly distracted by her winking and waving at Taylor from across the hallway. Multiple people wave back, which is only mildly irritating. 

“What makes ye say that?” Louis ignores the weird feeling that overcomes him when people part so that they can walk next to each other down the hallway.

“At Nick’s, there was like some weird energy.” 

“Ye starting with that shit?” Louis rolls his eyes.

“Not shit, Louis. There was bad energy. Danielle said it’s hard to do both, you know. Be true to Liam and be a Londoner.” She shrugs. Louis stores that information, _maybe Liam is hurting more than he thought._

“They are still together, though.” Louis argues, more for his own benefit than hers.

“Yeah, suppose so.” They separate at the door, Eleanor taking her seat next to Liam and Louis hurrying to the back to sit by himself.

Jade turns around to him, she has been waiting for him. “You hear it yet?” 

“Hear wha’, love?’

“That’s a no.” 

“Spill, Jade.” Jade goes jumpy on her seat. 

“At Nick’s someone trashed his cousins room, he’s looking for the people. Well, his aunt is. He wants to charge them two hundred peas.”

Louis goes stone-cold, _well shit._ “Wait a moment? His aunt? His cousin?” 

“Yeah, why?” Her bouncing stops for a moment.

“What’s this got to do with ‘em?” Louis asks.

“Oh you know the house was his aunts, and she was on a retreat of sorts, anyway they got stuck. That’s why we could have a party there. And it was the cousin’s room got trashed.” 

“Do they ‘ave an idea who it was?”

“Apparently not.” Jade shrugs. _What stops Harry from telling Nick that it was me? If they are truly dating or seeing each other, then Harry would tell him. It’s just who Harry is. He’s honest._ _And stubborn, oh so stubborn. That’s a totally different story, though._ Jade is waving her hand in front of Louis. “Earth to Louis, you stopped moving for a while.”

“Oi. Get yer stinkin’ hands out of me face.” Jade laughs when he bets at her hands. 

He tells Liam if he needs him, he’s only a phone call away. Then he takes Bertie into town. There is no football practice today, so he has time to go from one store to the next. He leaves all of his CVs with friendly and unfriendly people. Some laugh him out of their shops, a few old ladies give him a sad smile when they tell him they can’t afford another person on their payroll. 12 CVs later and Louis is giving up. He walks past Mandeville Bakery, and briefly wonders how Harry got his job there, since he only had student credentials as well. Defeated he drives home, fills a bathtub, lights a rose scented candle and lets his head thud against the bath.

A phone call rattles him out of his sleep. _God, I was lucky to survive_. He thinks and quickly jumps out of the bath. He recently watched some thrillers where people were dying in the bathtub, because they fell asleep. He must have been more exhausted than he thought. Maybe rejection has that effect on him. The screen reads Eleanor. Louis rolls his eyes, “what do ye want?” 

“I’m calling for Liam. He’s piss drunk. Can you please pick him up? He’s rambling about Danny, it’s all quite pathetic. He’s also vomiting. No one here can drive him.”

“Ew.” Louis says. _Liam is a bad and whiney drunk._

“You coming, honey?” Eleanor asks.

“Of course, need to put some pants on, though.” Louis lets the water out of the tub and hurries to put on some black tight pants, and a loose sitting muscle shirt that read ‘skate rough.’ His hair is still wet, and he quite likes how the clothes stick to his wet body. He runs out to Bertie, passing by his mother who is snogging Dan in the living room. “Ew, don’t ye have a room?” Dan has the decency to blush, but his mother only pokes out her tongue.

“Wait where you going?” Jay asks, hiding something behind her back.

“Out.” Louis gets into the car and drives to Niall’s. He doesn’t exactly have the address, but he remembers walking past it when the lads were playing in the park. The two-story town house is buzzing with people. Louis can’t even find a parking outside, having to stop the car in the middle of the road. He don’t give a shit, though. 

Niall’s very popular boy in school, when Louis arrives he has to park in the middle of the street, blocking another car, since there’s no more room. He walks past a group of five, very drunk, lower sixth formers that are smoking outside. Thanks to them the door stands ajar, Louis enters and tries to find his bearings. A small kitchen leads away from the entry, down the hall is the small living room, which is attached to the hallway Louis walks down in order to find the bathroom, he presumes Liam is stuck in. “Ye seen Liam?” He asks a girl with dark straight hair. She points down the hallway. Louis keeps walking until he has to use some stairs.

He stalks through the emptying house. It’s past two in the morning and Louis can see the rest of alcohol dripping from all kinds of surfaces, he finds a used condom in what he presumes is Niall’s father’s room. The bathroom upstairs has piss in the bathtub, but no Liam. He pushes open another bedroom, he hoped was Niall’s, he’s not prepared for what he finds instead. Jade is pinning Perrie against the wall. Perrie’s breasts are exposed, the lace of her braw pushed away from her nipples and Jade is fiddling with one of them. Her own dress pushed up to expose Perrie’s hand in her nickers. “Jesus Christ!” Louis quickly turns around.

“Tommo!” He hears Jade say, “thought you aren’t coming.”

“Just ‘ere to pick Liam up.” He quickly closes the door, thinks twice and re opens it. Facing the other way he calls, “Ye haven’t seen him, have ye?” 

“Fuck off, Tommo.” Perrie complains, albeit very airy. 

“He downstairs, last I saw him.” Jade says firm.

“Cheers.” He closes the door again, reopens it, “this is a thing ‘en?”

“Tommo! Fuck off.” Louis quickly closes the door again. He steps away, but smirks, _this is so fun_. He turns around, opens the door again. 

“Is it?” 

He can hear someone stomp over, “yes, it is. We’re keeping it secret for now. Enjoying some alone time, so fuck off.”

“Didn’t see nothin’.” Louis laughs, Jade gives him a punch into the small of his back. Louis tumbles forward and Jade close the door on him. Louis is still snickering to himself when he skips down the steps. In a mirror he can see that his hair and collarbone are still wet. His stronger muscles in his arms pop slightly and he can see his high cheekbones are more apparent. 

Confident, he walks back into the living room. There’s only a handful of people still here, Micheal Jackson is playing over the speakers. Niall is standing on the coffee table dancing some of MJ’s more famous moves. Liam is cheering him on, fucker is doing just fine. Eleanor is leaning against him, sitting on the armchair. Her pupils are blown, and one of the lacy bunny ears that she is wearing has a kink and is leaning forward. “Play Elvis, come on Harry show us your old moves.”

Self-assured Louis walks over to the couch, his hips are swaying from the gravity pulling on his bum, even if he wasn’t trying to shift so lasciviously. His hands sway with him as if he were running loops on the pitch. He wiggles himself in-between Eleanor, sitting on the arm and Liam, quite drunkly in the middle of the couch. “Thought ye were dyin’.” Louis says.

“Nope. Just wanted to get you here.” Liam grins. “Why are you so wet? Fall into a lake?”

“Mischievous fucker.” Louis flips his fringe, and in the corner of his eyes he can see Harry openly checking him out.

“Made you come didn’t it?” Liam says proudly.

“Properly the first time that you have ever been clever Liam.” Liam’s pulls a face, but chuckles, nonetheless. “And I was in a bath, for your information.” Louis says louder, hoping that Harry can hear. Maybe thinking of Louis in a bath fully naked will give him something to wank about.

“Right.” Liam giggles, yeah he fucking giggled. 

“Beer?” Eleanor leans down and tries to give him an already opened beer bottle. Louis takes it, but he can see that there’s only about a third left, which means someone has been drinking it before him. With a disgusted shiver he puts it back down.

“You shouldn’t romanticise people just because they are dead.” He calls over to Niall, he freezes in motion.

“You hating on Michael right now?” Liam asks.

“Deffo.” Louis grins.

“We’re not friends any more!” Niall says, stern.

“Alrigh, alright, I’ll make it up to you!” Louis grins, grabs the beer bottle again and walks towards his friend. He pushes him aside and plugs his phone in, a love song starts playing loudly. Louis starts singing dramatically, heaving and moving in the motion. He gets applause for most parts and when he goes for the overture “Near, far, wherever you are” Louis breaths in and out harshly, imitating Celine Dion’s breathy bridge.

“I believe that the heart does go on”

He high-pitches the next part while falling to his knees.

“Once more you open the door” 

“And you're here in my heart” 

Louis holds out his hand to Niall, desperately trying to grab for him.

“And my heart will go on and on.”

“Alright, we get the picture.” Liam giggles, “stop Tomlinson.” 

“Ye won’t even let me finish?” Louis says incredulous, still crouching on the floor with an extended hand.

“Nope. Get up. Harry, it’s time for Elvis.” Liam makes hand motions to get Louis to move. He rolls his eyes, and Harry brushes his hip lightly with his nervous finger. The goosebump that erupt all over his body has nothing to do with that small contact, absolutely nothing. Niall pats him on the back and gives him one of his signature smiles. Louis walks over to him and hugs him tightly against his chest. “Love ye, Ni.”

“Sap.” Niall whispers into his ear, going lax in his arms. The music starts to a very familiar tone, Louis wiggles himself back into his spot on the couch, just as Liam gets up to get more alcohol. 

Harry’s deep voice fills the room, when he starts singing. It takes Louis a moment to realise what Harry is singing, “Shall I stay? Would it be a sin. If I can't help falling in love with you?” Harry can’t fix his eyes on anything but the coffee table.Jade and Perrie stumble back into the living room, showcasing two very red heads.

Louis chuckles when Jade gives him a warning glare. Liam stumbles back and falls on top of Louis’ left leg. “Darling, so it goes, Some things are meant to be” Harry keeps singing, on his tip toe, Harry turns his knee from left to right in a typical Elvis wiggle. Louis snorts a laugh, Harry gains more confidence and looks up.

“You think he’s singing to you?” Liam unhelpfully asks.

“Probably not.” Louis denies the butterflies that flutter freely in his stomach.

“Take my hand

Take my whole life too

For I can't help falling in love with you” 

Harry finishes ripping his arms in the air and lifting himself on the tip toes like Elvis. Granted, he gets more applause than Louis. Barbara and Perrie sing another song from Madonna, after Niall bought down his karaoke set and his guitar. It’s half three when Liam leans over to Louis and screams into his ear “WANNA GET OUT OF HERE? ‘M HUNGRY.“

“Fuck!” Louis squeals. “I think there’s an actual ringin’ in my ear.” Jade is laughing next to Louis. “Ye want to stay? I’ll take Liam home now.” He asks, standing up and leaning over Jade to talk to Eleanor.

“You go. I’ll hitch a ride with them.” She points at Perrie who is waving at Louis. 

“Okay.” Louis should lean down and give her a kiss goodbye, but he doesn’t want to _display anything_ which could be misconstrued by the certain people. He grabs Liam below the arm and helps him up. He slumps against his side, and they walk past the small group. 

“Thanks for comin’, Tommo!” Niall shouts, still focused on strumming his instrument.

“See ye at practice, mate.” Louis calls over his shoulder. His car still waits for him, and Louis pushes Liam into it. Liam actually knocks his head.

“Ow!” 

“Sorry, do it yerself.” Louis says.

“Unbalanced…” Liam repeats multiple times.

Louis sighs and leans over to rub Liam’s shoulder. “Fancy goin’ home?”

“No. I need something to eat.” Liam says, rubbing his eyes. 

“Fish and Chips?” Louis says.

“Reading minds now Tommo?” Liam slurs. 

“Somethin’ like that.” Louis says while starting his car. It takes him a while to find the right place, Lightening Bell’s Fish&Chips is in the north of town, close enough to a bus station, where all the teens from the closest club, Base, have to use. Louis parks relatively close, “wake up, dickhead.” Louis helps him back out of the car and across the street.

The Fish&Chips store looks a little like an American Diner, a few sofa like booths line the west wall,while there are some squeaky chairs and tables standing closer to the counter. “Oi.” Louis greets the bold boy behind the counter. He was happily chatting with the fish flipper.

“Aye, Aye.” He greets, taking his hands out of his jean pockets. “What can I get you?” 

Louis kicks Liam, “Chicken Kebab please and a large coke.”

“I’ll just take the cheesy chips.” Louis fiddles with his wallet in his back pocket, Liam is swaying dangerously on his feet. “Sit down Liam.” Liam stumbles to sit, the chair almost falling with him.

“We close in like 10, so he better not fall asleep.” The boy says. _And wow, wow, he has green eyes. I miss green eyes._ Louis pays. He waits patiently while the boys behind the counter start talking to each other again, the clock ticking closer and closer to four o’clock. The flipper has long blonde hair that he had pulled into a man-bun. 

“Hey.” He says again, green-eyes turns. “Are ye lookin’ for staff?” 

The boy comes closer again, “yeah, we actually are. You interested.” 

“For sure, have been tryin’ to find a job all day.” The boy raises his eyebrow. “Don’t tell yer boss I said that.”

“No worries,“ baldy says. “Geoff is pretty cool, all he wants is people he can get along with. You got a CV?” 

“YES!” Louis eagerly screams. “Sorry, sorry, it’s in me car. Give me a moment.” _Thank God, well thank me, for printing new CVs._ He runs back with a CV in hand.

“I’ll tell him to give you a call after school, yeah?”

“Sounds mint.” 

“Mint.” The boy grins and turns to the fish flipper, taking his order and handing it over to Louis. “See you soon, I guess.” 

“Yeah, have good last two minutes of your shift.” Baldy laughs, so does the man-bun.

“Thanks, pal.”

💚🍑💙

“Lads things that lads do just cause they are lads.” Louis snickers. 

“I agree with that.” Anthony says, jotting down their idea. Louis is sitting cross-legged between the Drama Class. He can’t believe his luck, finally doing something that he actually loves doing.

“How about we make Juliet a man?” A girl asks. He hasn’t learned her name yet, she is a small girl with a messy bleach-blonde bun. She’s also a friend of Eleanor. 

“You serious?” Brandon asks her. “Come on Meg, half of the school is homophobic and almost all of the staff. There’s no way anyone would come to that production.” He had a point. From what Louis had learned they would never get anyone to pay tickets to see a school play about gays.

“But in the modern context of the play, it’d totally makes sense if they were gay.” Meg defends her idea. Due to Louis suggestion, Mr. Corden had agreed that the Drama Class would be creating a modern day Romeo and Juliet for the school’s play, preformed by the Drama Club.

“Then make them lesbians.” Louis supplies. “Everyone seems t’ be fine with the girl on girl action.”

“I do.” Brandon unhelpfully says.

“Fair game, mate.” Louis nods to himself, grinning from ear to ear. He starts bouncing on his toes. “Do ye think tha’ll work?” Meg plays with her rings, a frown on her face. _Grow up, not all ideas are going to be implemented._

“I think those are some great ideas.” Mr. Corden buds in, he had been subtly listening to them while he played Tetris on his computer. Since Louis had taught him about private window function, he no longer had to worry about his boss sneaking on him. “I want all of you to take a scene and re-write it in your own words. Do some more brainstorming. Maybe one of you can create a facebook-message group thing, so you can all put your heads together during other classes.” He chuckles at his own joke. 

“I can make a WhatsApp group.” Anthony holds up his hand. 

“Good, yeah, that’s totally what I meant.” Corden says, a little flustered. 

“Do you think we could go with a lesbian angle, Mr. Corden?” Someone in class asks.

“Definitely!” Mr. Corden smiles proudly. The bell goes off, declaring the end of the period. “One more thing, before you all brizzle away… Auditions for the play will be on the 27th, next Thursday, at three thirty after classes. Tell your friends, and also lower sixth formers, maybe some fifth formers if you want. Most importantly if you want to be a part of this extremely great idea, you all have to audition for the Drama Club yourselves.” He claps in his hand and dismisses the class.

“Mr. Corden?” Louis steps up to the man.

“Spill it kid.”

“Well, I was wandering can I audition on another day. I ‘ave footie after classes on Thursday.” 

“Louis, if you want to be in this play, than you have to show me that you are willing to go to all lengths to be in it. I’m sorry, but I won’t make excuses for my Drama students.” 

“Yes of course.” Louis deflates a bit. Maybe he can convince Coach to let him skip just this once.

“Heads up, no dogs have fallen from the sky yet.”

“I don’t understand.” Louis pulls a face.

“No worries, me neither.” Corden seems proud of himself. _Weirdo._

After classes, Louis goes to footie. At practice, two of the try-outs were taken over, Louis can’t say that he has properly learned both names. One of them is Joe.

“Coach, Coach! Can I ‘ave a word?” Louis calls over the pitch drenched after another water fight with Liam.

“Yeah of course.” Coach turns around to Louis, putting his clipboard in front of his chest while crossing his arms in front of it.

“I can’t make practice next Thursday.” Louis says, still a little out of breath, Liam had chased him around the pitch at least four times.

“Why is that?” Coach’s tone is deeper than usual. _Okay, he’s going for the intimidation. Breath, Louis, just don’t tell him it’s for the college play. Just lie._

“Got meself in some trouble at school, got detention.” Louis finally says, swiping his dripping fringe to the side.

Coach looks sceptical, _stupid, stupid excuse, why would they delay detention till Thursday?_ “Yeah, alright. Just don’t make a habit out of it.” Louis nods, relieved. Coach clearly don’t believe him, but at least he got the night off. _Now all he has to do is learn the lines, easy. Right?_

All of that is forgotten for a moment when he sees the bucket of water, it’s used to keep the water bottles in. Louis grabs it and sneaks on Liam, who is waving his hands talking to Niall. Louis tips it, so that the cold water passes down his body. Liam shivers and tries to whack at Louis. Louis snickers and starts running, again.

“Die, motherfuckers.” Louis screams.

“Lou, come on, it’s just Mario Kart. You’re giving my poor mom a heart attack.” Liam rolls his eyes in exasperation, it’s been the same thing he has been saying for the last hour.

Louis leans to the side and furiously hits the A-button on his controller. “Come on, pretty, accelerate!” Louis spurs on his Kart driver. “Payno, yer mum is happy that ye have a friend, she’d forgive me anythin’.” 

“Fucker.” Liam says under his breath. It’s obvious that he cannot disagree with him. Louis has been hanging around in Liam’s room since his mother’s wedding. Zayn’s shed had rendered useless now, his treehouse was getting too cold and his house had too many eyes. The only plays that they had left was Liam’s. 

Liam phone goes off. “Shut that off, Payno. I’m winning here, those distraction methods won’t work.” 

“Time out” Liam screams instead. He looks down on his phone. “How would Danielle even know when you are loosing and when it's the best time to call?”

“Couples, mate, got wicked telepathy skills.” Louis says, completely believing it too.

Liam is snickering when he answers the phone. Louis uses the time to stuff as many Celebration candies into his mouth as he can. He might be getting sick. Louis can’t help but eavesdrop. “Hi…yeah… How is it?… Broadway? Wow, so soon?… Right? Male or female teacher? … I’m not jealous… I’m just saying be careful… I mean you’re a beautiful girl, don’t let him twirl your head… Yeah, ok. Bye, love you.” Liam hangs up with a sigh. 

“All alright?” Louis asks, licking at his fingers.

“Yeah. She might do Broadway, her teacher got her an audition.”

“He hot?” Louis asks.

“What?” Liam’s annoyed, but also a little hurt. 

“The teachers? Is ‘e hot?” Louis repeats. 

“How would I know?” Liam asks, upset.

Louis shrugs. “Can we resume?” They start playing again, “ye know Liam, the whole we can talk thing goes both ways, yeah?”

“Yeah, thanks.” Liam says. Louis thinks that will be the end of it, but Liam starts talking again. Louis grunts a little. “It’s just she all over there. And I get it, she’s experiencing all these knew cool things, getting closer to her dream, and meeting all these fun people. And I know nothing about any of that. Here… here nothing changes. Same people, same college and same activities, you know?”

“Hey don’t downplay it, mate.” Louis starts whispering, “we got an American now!”

“Did you ever talk to that girl?” Liam pauses the game again to give Louis a rude side-eye.

“Nah. Don’t know what she even looks like.” Louis grins.

“You are so far up your own ass!” Liam says.

“I knaw.” Louis throws his hands in the air, “believe me I kna.”

“Guess you hope you were up Harry’s ass.” Liam says, _which rude._ Louis doesn’t respond right away, using Liam’s distraction to re-play the game. “Heeeeey!” Liam complains. After another pause, he asks “to soon?”

“No. It was actually yer best diss yet.” 

“Cheers.” Liam grins more proud, and his kart player moves through the finish line. “BUJAHH.” Liam jumps up, fisting his arms in the air. “Suck on that, you prick.”

“LiAm!” Karen Payne says shocked. “Language.” She’s about Louis height, has a mum’s gentle smile, soft eyes and blonde strawish hair that’s slowly going grey. 

“Oh don’t worry about ‘im Mrs. P. He won like three out of ten. He needs a tiny moment of glory.” Louis clarifies. Liam’s hands fall down against his body again. 

“What you up to, mum?” Liam asks, with a new scold between his eyebrows.

“Got you some sandwiches boys.” She shuffles in and places a plate with four sandwiches on Liam’s small table. 

“This is mint, cheers Mrs. P. Very much appreciated, love.” Louis immediately snags one of them and bites into it. 

“Your welcome.” She blushes slightly, a small rose colour filling her unusual white skin. “Dinner’ll be in an hour, should I set a place for you?” 

“Oh, I’d love to but me mum wants me home I think. You know, help her, wrangle up all the tiny buggers.” Louis says around a mouthful.

“Thanks mum, see you later.” Liam insists, pushing her towards the door. Liam sits back down on the bean bag. Louis grabs the plate and thrusts it in the general direction of Liam. The weight soon leaves his hand. “She hung up on me.” 

“Danielle?” Louis asks, when he finally realises what Liam has said.

“Yupp. She thinks I’m jealous and controlling.” Liam clarifies.“Am I?”

“How would I know?” 

“You are sort of my best friend fright now. If you don’t, who does?” Liam says.

“Ow, Payno, that warms me heart. Ye’re the dad. Ye are controllin’, ye are annoyin’, but that’s all t’ stuff we like about ye.”

“We?” Liam asks.

“Yer friends, silly.” Louis nudges him with his big toe, his legs are too short and he almost looses balance to reach Liam.

“You realise that the reason I didn’t have friends for a long time?” Liam says.

“And now ye ‘ave friends who like ye as ye are. Honest and annoyin’.” Louis grins, exposing the salad stuck between his teeth. Liam has blushed, but he looks more confident, like he actually believes it this time. 

“You have something between your teeth.” He says, diverting from his happiness.

Louis pushes the chewed up bread in front of his teeth and smiles. “Still there?”

“Fuck off, you tosser.” Liam throws a pillow after him.

Louis has to hurry up if he wants to get home on time for dinner. His phone is already blowing up from all the messages, he can peek at it from time to time, vibrating on the passenger seat. He has to take a stop at the annoyingly red traffic light. A beautiful boy is crouching near the bushes, a camera is in his hands, and he’s trying to get the right angle to photograph the primrose. He’s leaning over awkwardly, giving Louis a great view of that perky bum. 

There’s a honk, and the beautiful creature falls over. His curls bouncing when his bum hits the floor. _Such a klutz._ Louis laughs, and starts driving, feeling the green eyes on his side profile.

💚🍑💙

Louis placed the football in front of one of the twins carefully, “when you kick it, ye want to be sure to use the side of yer foot, slightly below.” He takes her foot and shows her the spot, “right there ‘nd then the footie lifts off.”

Daisy is still squirming, and starts hopping on one foot, when Louis doesn’t immediately take his hand off of her foot. “You didn’t teach this to Lottie or Fizzy!” The girl complains.

“Because they were more interested in puttin’ makeup on their faces and try look pretty.” Louis argues, remembering how Lottie had hit him on the head with a flat shoe with a large bow on top. Or Fizzy who had laughed at him and kept trying out a new eyeliner for a new emo look.

“They are. So pretty.” Daisy agrees.

“Never be as pretty…” Phoebe hangs her head.

“ ‘ey, ‘ey, ‘ey, none of that. You are two beautiful girls!” Louis falls on his knees and grabs their chins, lifting them simultaneously, so their large eyes look back at him. 

“Not like them.” Daisy dares to say, while Phoebe nods along.

“You still have to grow sweets. Then ye will make heads spin… and I will be ‘ere to kick their asses when ‘em boys get to close to ye.” 

“Hihih…Lou…” Phoebe giggles, while Louis attacks her stomach with tickles.

“I think we can kick them ourselves.” Daisy argues, with her hands on her hips. Louis snorts, _that’s the spirit._

“Okay, let’s practice some lifts, yeah?” The girls nod. “See if ye learn to kick it with tha’ spot, ‘en I’ll get ye girls some sweets from the bakery, alright?” 

“YES!” They both squeal. Daisy kicks the ball and it’s a very flat curve.

“No worries, no worries, ‘is is much better than before, yeah love?” Daisy nods. “Phoebe come here. Daisy get the ball.” Daisy takes off over the small patch of green from the park, to the flower bed where her footie fell. “You can kick the ball on yer thigh, like bounce, bounce.” She jumps on one leg to do what Louis asks, he’s holding the ball in place so that it never flies off too hard. “That’s great.” 

Daisy comes back with her ball, “I want’o do that too.” 

“Yeah, alright. Come here. Phoebe relax for mo.” Phoebe pouts, but watches her sister stick out her tongue in concentration and repeat the process. “Girls ye’ll need this for life, right?” The girls both stare at him with big eyes, Daisy’s ball falls to the ground. “If a bad man ever attacks ye, you use this and point ye knee against ‘ere.” He points to his groin “He’ll cry like a babby.” 

“Is that what they mean with kickin’ asses?” Phoebe asks, cocking her head.

“Not exactly, but let’s go with that.” 

Phoebe squeals, “Daisy we can kick asses now!” Louis feels like he missed something when the two fall into each other’s arms. 

“Tommo!” Someone calls behind them, “finally playing with kids your own age?” Louis turns around to look at a very thin Zayn. 

“Yer back?” Louis asks, watching Zayn approach slowly.

“Yeah. How’s it been?” Zayn asks, nervously chewing on his lip. Daisy and Phoebe are rolling around on the floor now. “These yer sisters then?”

“Half of ‘em anyway.” Louis rubs the back of his head. “Daisy and Phoebe.” He points at them individually, but it’s hard to tell who is who at the moment. “Don’t worry there won’t be a quiz.” Zayn chuckles. “How are you, mate? Ye look thin.” _Damn maybe he wasn’t suppose to say that._

“Well, actually because of the rehab I developed this shitty thing called anorexia.”

“Fuck!” Louis is genuinely shocked.

“Yeah, so now I have to write these dumb food journal, to make sure I eat enough in a day.” Zayn shakes his head. “My mum and I look at the diary every night before going to bed. I’m feelin’ like a toddler.” 

“Sorry about that.” Louis says, while the twins start chasing each other with footballs, the objective of the game remains to be determined. 

“I wanted to say thanks, actually.” Louis just blinks at him awkwardly. “I was a dick during summer and I took it out on you. That proposal was shit too, just panicked you know?” Louis nods, even though Zayn isn’t watching him. “And then you called my father, and I just freaked. I don’t like talking to my father about anything. My uncle gave me shit for everything, and I sort of blamed you.”

“I guess thanks.” Louis says. “I was really feelin’ bad. Didn’t want to put ye in that position, the girls riled me up ’n’ when ye came back ye were shite and I hated ye for it even more.”

“I’m sorry.” Zayn says. “It was Liam actually that really helped.”

“Liam?” Louis looks astonished.

“He was the only one that picked up my calls when I was in there.” Zayn says. “He put my brain straight, better than any of those buffoons inside the rehab.” 

“Maybe it’s a career path for ‘im.” Louis chuckles. 

“Louis? Who’s this?” Daisy peeks at Zayn behind Louis’ hip.

“This is Zayn.”

“Hi Zayn!” Both girls wave their tiny hands at them. “Can we get our sweets now?”

“Pretty please, Louie!” 

“Yeah, alright.” He wants to grab their hands, but they wiggle away. “Grab yer footballs, love.” They gather their footballs in their hands. “Sa are ye coming back t’ college?”

“Tomorrow yeah.” Zayn says.

The girls are back and their pulling on Louis shirt. “SWEETs Louis!” 

“I got t’ go. Bye Zayn.”

“BYE ZAYN!” The girls wave at him, before they hurry down the small path of the park. Mandeville Bakery is close by, and they walk about seven minutes from the park to town square. 

“Why did we have to learn how to play footie, Louie?” Phoebe suddenly asks him, after the girls have been chatting with each other for the past five minutes.

“Because girls who only care about looks ‘nd make up are boring.” Louis says, without thinking.

“Mum said I could be a scientist.” Daisy cheers.

“That’s what dad told me.” Phoebe says, they squeal, again. 

“Please help me.” Louis whispers to no one in particular.

The bell jingles, when Louis shuffles the twins through the door. Neither of them hold his hand any more, Phoebe has decided that she is too cool for that as well. Louis looks up and realises where he just walked into on a Sunday! He’s never seen Harry at work before, and he realises that this might have been a mistake. He’s wearing a red apron and the hair at his temples pulled into a half bun on top of his head, while the rest of his hair falls in ringlets down to his shoulders. Harry’s smiling brightly at one of his regulars, when one of his co-workers, Louis thinks it might be Barbara, gives him a nudge. She points at Louis and the lines of Harry’s forehead deepen. The girls are already standing at the showcase, their sweaty fingers making prints on the glass. “Girls, take yer hands off the glass, please.” They immediately retract their fingers. 

“It’s not a problem.” Harry says to him, but Louis tries to ignore him. It’s hurtful enough that he looks like a God damn angel.

“Lou, Lou, Lou!” Daisy is pulling on his arm. “Can I have that one, it looks so nice and squishy.”

“Squishy?” Louis snickers, she probably means the vanilla cream in the bun. “How about ye, love? Want t’ same?” Louis addresses Phoebe.

She shakes her head and points at a piece of cake, silently. Louis nods and gives her a kiss on top of her head. It’s so usual for her to be the quiet one. Karen is free so Louis tries to talk to her, but she smiles and points at Harry “You were the one that brought Harry his cakes when he was injured right?” 

“Oh” Louis can feel a little heat shoot up his cheeks, when his sisters look up at him, curiosity in their eyes. “Yeah tha’ was me.” 

“Well, we only found out what had happened after, so…” She trails off and Louis sneaks a look at Harry, he might be trying to act all cold, but he’s never been hard to read, his ears going adorably red. With shaky fingers he pulls out the correct bills to give back to the man that had been picking up a pizza-sized cake. “You are a brave young man, it’s good to know that chivalry is not dead.” 

Louis tries to smile away the awkwardness of that statement. “Don’t sound like me.” Louis argues. “Could we ‘ave that sponge cake ’n' a piece of chocolate cake, please.” 

Karen looks a little taken back, but she quickly gets a box to safely secure the food for travel. She then passes the box to Harry, who types that into his cashier. “That’ll be 6 pounds please.” 

Louis pats for his wallet, “ye sure ye can’t pay yerself girls.” 

The twins frown at him and start tickling his side, “ye promised! Ye promised! We earned t’is, give us cake!!!” 

Louis giggles “gimme a mo.” He frees himself from the girls who are both hugging one of his legs, so he can’t take off on them, which he has done in the past to make fun of them. “Here ye go.” He hands over a 10 pound bill to Harry. Harry has his endeared frog-face on, _see so readable_. 

“Good to see you girls.” He leans over the barrier to smile at them.

“HI HARRY!” The girls call in unison. “Harry we played footie today, we’re going to be t’ best ass kickers ever.”

“Oh.” Harry looks perplexed, “every girl definitely needs to know that!”

“Can you kick ass, Harry?” Daisy asks, her hands are back on the showcase, peaking up at Harry at the till. Louis slides up behind her and pushes her away. Her fingertips leaving oval shapes on the otherwise clear glass.

“My sister taught me actually, and your brother’s friend Liam.”

“T’ sad one?” Phoebe whisper shouts towards Louis.

“Yes.” Louis says.

Harry laughs. “I’ll remember this for later.” Harry didn’t have it in him to be mad at Louis in front of the twins. Louis starts to drum his hand on top of Phoebe’s head, she tries to squirm away, but Louis keeps his hand there. “Have you heard Nick is looking for the people who were at his house?”

“Yeah.” Louis says, detecting the slight change in Harry’s voice.

“They owe him money.” Harry says stern. He puts the money on the counter.

“I’m sure ye already told yer boyfriend everythin’ about that night.” Louis retorts, showing the money into his wallet, the coins wrongly falling between his bills.

“What? No.” Harry’s curls bounce from the sudden movement. 

“Ye surprise me, Curly. Thought ye were the honest type.” It’s mean and uncalled-for, but the image of Nick and Harry laughing at him really hurts. He shoves the waller into his back pocket. 

“I would never do that!” Harry deflects. “It’s you who isn’t honest about that party! It’s not even that much money.”

Louis doesn’t react to the second part of the comment. “Yeah, I’m sure ye two can have a laugh about me tonigh’. Come on angels.” He puts a hand on the back of their heads and moves them to the door, their faces are already messy from their chosen sweet. Louis would smile, but Harry’s still swimming inside his head.

“Louis why are you running from me?” He can hear Harry shuffling around the counter, and manoeuvres the kids out faster.

“Wha’ did Harry do?” Daisy asks, stopping to look at him, trying to lick off some cream from her nose.

“Nothin’ come on let’s keep walkin’.” Louis moves them along, walking them down the pedestrian crossing.

“But he’s following us.” Phoebe suddenly says. Louis turns around and sees Harry jogging after them with red cheeks, his hair bouncing, the apron twisting at his knees. 

“Louis we have to talk.” He calls, when their eyes lock, green looking into dark blue.

“Raise ye t’ the car.” Louis says quickly. The girls bolt, Louis has a tough time catching up to them. 

💚🍑💙

Two days later, Louis is trying to get a head of his biology essay. He’s currently trying to learn how genes get passed down to by generations. His favourite fun fact is that bald men get their bald-gene from their maternal grandfather. 

Short legs sit down next to him, and Louis inhales and smell the distinct honey tone. He’s smelt this before, standing in front of Harry with flowers in his hand. “I’m Danielle.” Louis doesn’t react. “Danielle Campbell.” Louis looks up. She’s a beautiful young girl, with a slim petite figure, blue eyes, rosy cheeks, a strong round cheek to jaw structure. She starts pealing grapes one after another from their stem and eats them slowly. “And you are Harry’s lover boy.”

Louis rolls his eyes “don’t think ‘e likes it when ye call me tha’.”

“No, I suppose he doesn’t.” Louis looks up just as she pops the grape past her full lips. She smiles when she sees him watching.

“Ye’re a Yankee.” Louis concludes. “Didn’t realise t’ last time.” He starts ruffling through the book to find the small paragraph he needs to put the cheery on top of his essay. 

“Weird most people can totally, like, hear it within the first sentence.” She waves around with one of her grapes, while she sings her words in a typical Californian accent. “Apparently Americans are like Zoo-animals around here.”

“To be fair, love, ye didn’t say much when we met ‘nd ye were whispering into Harry’s ear.”

“Yeah that must have been quite distracting.” Danielle’s lips curl in amusement.

Louis wants to choke her with her fucking grapes. “Yer not that rivetin’. Hold on how did ye knaw Harry then?”

“We met at the camera store. Did you know he wants to become a photographer?” Louis vaguely remembers the Polaroid camera he got on his last birthday and the time he took pictures of that flower a couple nights ago.

“Thought tha’ was for fun.” Louis says, instead.

“Nope he actually wants to do it for real. That’s what we were doing when you came over by the way. He said he didn’t have anyone to pose for him for some portraits shots, so like I totally volunteered.” 

Louis ignores the pain in his heart, _what kind of pictures did he take of her? Naked ones? On the bed? Did they use my flowers as a bed to lie on?_ Louis shakes his head, “Why ye in good ole England?”

“My dad works for Sony. You know the tech company?”

“My God, why does t‘is entire town work for Sony?” Louis slams the book shut, remembering the ugly bald head of Mr. Calder. 

“That’s hardly true.” Danielle’s eyes sparkle with amusement. “Oh sweet, why so agitated? It’s a great company.”

“Oh fuck off.” Louis mumbles, reopening his book, damn lost the page. 

He doesn’t realise that she is leaning toward him until the honey registers in his nose, and a small itching tingle erupts on his shoulder where her hair is tickling him. “You’ll learn to love me. Just you wait and see.” She breathes into his ear before standing up and swaying away. She’s rounder than he remembered, and she’s smaller than Louis, probably only standing at 5’3. _Maybe that’s Harry’s type then, round curves, small and blue-eyed, just like me_.

Jade is wining, it’s another round of the dumbest game to find to play in Maths. This time it’s Tic Tac Toe. “How’s it goin’ with Perrie?” He whispers. 

Jade’s blush is so soft, Louis almost misses it, if it weren’t for her oversized glasses that were fogging up on the bottom of the wire. “Good.” She grins at him. “Really good.” 

“Great.” Louis says. He’s not quite sure how to go from here. _What would I say if it were Lottie,_ “should I pay her a visit, intimidate her?” Jade is giggling into her fist. 

“What would you say?”

“Listen here young lady,” for no apparent reason he deepens his voice. “Ye hurt her I kill ye. Ye leave ‘er, I’ll spit in yer food.” He shrugs, “somethin’ like that.”

“That ever work on your sister’s boyfriends?” Jade asks, adding another x to the left corner.

“I hope so.” Louis admits. “I think I need t’ re-establish this with Tommy.”

“Poor guy.” Jade says, Louis puts an o on the right middle field.

“I’m auditionin’ for t’ play.” Louis whispers. He looks around to make sure no one heard him, the only one looking at him is Sophia, but she has a what-do-you-want-look on her face. 

“Wow. That’s cool.” 

“Do ye think it’s social suicide?” Louis asks again.

Jade shrugs, “Ashton will take the piss, but I don’t think anyone will follow. Calum has become really tame lately.” 

“Yeah what’s up with 'at?” Louis asks, adding another o. The boy in front of them, with large red glasses, shushes them.

“Some might say Jesy fucked some sense into him.” Jade grins while she draws the wining x.

“For fuck’s sake!” Louis screams, hitting his tabletop.

“Language Tomlinson. Come up here, solve this equation. Let’s see what you learned today.” Louis mumbles something while his chair scratches over the floor. 

“I always win.” Jade whispers. There is so much Louis could answer to that, but the class is looking at him, so he straightens his spine and bounds to the front of the class.

Louis is so nervous. _When was I last this nervous? Oh God, now I’m thinking about Harry again._ “You okay?” It’s Niall.

“Really nervous, mate.” Louis says. 

“I can see that.” Niall says.

“What are ye doin’ with that?” Louis stares at the blue waste bin that Niall is rolling around. 

“Taking it for a spin.” Niall says and knocks on the top. 

“That’s weird.” Louis says, “is it gigglin’?” 

Niall let’s out his haha-laugh, one that keeps on going, rumbling on like an avalanche. “That would be funny.”

“Tomlinson, you’re up.” Someone says from the stage door. 

“That’s me.” Louis gathers his papers, “thanks for distracting me.”

“Sure.” Niall grins and watches him disappear through the heavy doors. He looks down at the waste bin, “you want to see his audition, don’t you?” He grunts when there’s an agreement sound from within. 

Niall is sniggering when he starts rolling the bin again. The American stops him for a moment, “I just killed in there.” She flips her hair.

“You auditioned?” Niall asks.

“Of course, want to be an actress, I know so Californian of me. But…” Niall kicks the bin, the lid flies open and Harry jumps out like a cheerleader out of the birthday cake. Harry’s half-hearted scream, makes her crouch down and scream her heart out. Niall is laughing again, so is Harry. “You shit!” Danielle stands up again, putting her hands on her hips. Due to her petite posture she’s not very scary.

“Sorry we’re on a run.” Niall says and close the lid on Harry again. Danielle is screaming something after them, but Niall slowly rolls Harry into the auditorium. A quiet soft voice travels up to them, slowly Harry lifts the lid to stare at the stage. 

“He’s amazing Ni.” Harry says.

“You’re sounding lovesick again.” Niall informs him.

“Shhhh… I want to hear him.” Harry blushes slightly.

“If you get your camera out to film this I will lock you into this bin an entire night, Harold.”

“I don’t like it when you call me that.” Harry complains, standing up so that his shoulders peak over the bin.

“You do just fine when Louis does.” Harry gives him a look, which Niall just snickers at. He walks over to take a seat at the top of the chairs. Louis is preforming a scene from Romeo and Juliet, he’s currently begging Romy not to go see Juliet. “That makes a minimum of sense.”

“They made Romeo, Romy, a girl!” Harry says. “They’re rewriting the script to fit a modern lesbian story.”

“That’s wacked!” Niall grins. “Now it’s worth watching, mate.” 

“Do you ever shut up?” Harry complains, he’s still in the bin, he knows that if he tried to get out, he’d stumble, the bin would topple over and ruin Louis’ performance. 

“Louis?” Mr Corden suddenly asks into the auditorium.

“Yeah?” Louis asks.

“Can you sing?” 

“You want me to sing?” Louis asks, “it’s ain’t very strong.” 

“Try please.” Mr. Corden says, scribbling on the clipboard.

Louis clenches his fingers in front of his stomach, and starts singing. 

“All the smiles that I'm faking

‘Everything is great

Everything is fucking great’

Going out every weekend

His voice is soft and smooth, a little quiet, but higher than Harry would have expected. He looks over to Niall, his eyes are glued to the stage. Harry quickly grabs his phone and presses play. Harry would never miss the chance to film Louis singing.

“We're dancing on tables

And I'm off my face

With all of my people

And it couldn't get better they say

We're singing 'til last call

And it's all out of tune

Should be laughing, but there's something wrong

And it hits me when the lights go on

Shit, maybe I miss you.”

“Louis! Thank you.” Mr. Corden holds up his hand. “What song is that?” 

“I… I wrote it meself.” Louis says. “This summer.” Harry didn’t practically listen to the lyrics, too held up on the sleekness of Louis’ voice. But he has the recording now, so he can just replay it at home.

“Who were you missing?” Corden asks. 

Louis’ heart falls into his pants, gay panic flooding him like a cold shower “someone I… care about.” He fidgets.

“Would you be okay singing some intervals, when we have to re-set the stage for the next scene?” Corden asks.

“Would tha’ mean I can’t act?” Louis asks nervously. As the side-show he’d be mostly alone on stage, but he wanted to act more than anything.

“No.” Corden says. “We’d write it into your character. Of course your acting would be limited a bit, so that you don’t steal the full show of Romy and Juliet, but in the end you can’t play the main characters anyway. This would be the second best thing, if you are willing to sing that is.”

“Then I’ma good with it.” Louis beams. He never really sang in front of an audience, but if Niall’s party is anything to go by, he’s not all too bad at performing. 

“Great. Thank you, Louis. I will consider my options.” Corden makes a motion for Louis to leave the stage.

Louis wants to walk off, but stops. “One more question.”

“Yes?” 

“Could I sing me own songs?” 

“You have more?” Corden looks surprised. There hasn’t been many students that have shown such initiative as Louis has in just the first three weeks of term.

“Yes.” Corden nods with a tiny smile on his lips. Louis quickly gets off stage with a good feeling in his stomach, _I could use some of the letters I wrote for Harry to make some songs._ The song he just sang he had written from the letter he wrote on the 4th of August. Sometimes when he feels most sad, he locks himself in his closet and re-reads his letters. Last weekend he had picked out the one from the 14th of August, and written a song text with it, they shouldn’t go wasted after all.

“Why are ye so wet?” Jay asks, staring at her son dripping from top to bottom.

“Joined t’ swim team.” He says. She snorts a giggle. “Wan’ help?” He points to the laundry she’s currently folding. 

“While ye’re this wet?” Louis and Liam had another water fight at practice. After finishing his audition, Louis had driven back to footie, being able to practice for the last hour. He hadn’t bothered to shower today, feeling a little exposed after he had put himself out there to audition for the play.

He starts folding his own boxers, “mum, is this thing with Lottie and Tommy serious?”

“I do think sa, they have been dating since June, honey, and we are in September.” Jay grins.

“Don’t ye think it’s time for ‘im to meet us. Ye know scare the shite out of ‘im.” His mother chortles.

“Really?” She shakes her head while folding some lacy panties, Louis desperately does not want to know which one of his sisters wears that. “I met him, he seemed nice. He was at my wedding boo.”

“Me thinks, he ought to have dinner with us, again. Have to constantly drive the fright into his heart at constant intervals. So he don’t forget, not to hurt our girl.” Louis says. 

Jay is watching him carefully, “yes, fine.”

“Good. I’ll tell Lottie to bring him over on Sunday.” Louis says, grabs his folded underwear and is halfway to the stairs. 

“Boo, Sunday don’t work.” Jay informs him.

Louis stops in his tracks, “why not? Sunday is family day.” 

“The Hood’s are coming over.”

“As in Preacher Hood? And Calum Hood?” Louis asks, flabbergasted. _What the hell, that asshole in his home? She can’t be serious?_

“Yes, the preacher wants his son to see a good family. Ye know it’s just the two of them, and I don’t know if you know this. You might know this, you might not know this. Calum ran away from home in summer, and he got this new girlfriend, his father doesn’t like. He thought maybe he could befriend you, since you have such a nice girlfriend.” 

Louis starts laughing, but his mother is scolding him with a look. “Ye can’t be serious? Me and Calum? Are ye out of yer mind?” 

“Louis, please. He needs help.” Jay puts down the pink socks she was trying to wrangle together. 

“His new girlfriend is Jesy, ye met her. She’s the sweet one that thinks yer hot as hell…” His mother looks confused. “Ye know the one who helped me beet up Calum and Ashton.”

“You never actually told me what happened that night. All I know is ye had some scars and you got detention for two weeks.” Jay says, soft.

“Mum, Jesy is t’ best thin’ that could happen to that boy. She finally tore ‘im away from his ‘omophobic presumptuous ass that is his father. I mean neya wonda he beat up Harry every chance ‘e got with tha’ father!” Louis rambles, fury building in him.

Jay looks taken a back. “Well, they’re coming over. And you are to be nice to them! Now go upstairs and get dry!” Louis stomps up the stairs mumbling insults under his breath.

Calum is inspecting Louis’ comic and DVD collection. They arrived half an hour ago, and his mum forced him to show Calum his room, as if they were twelve. “ ‘eard about ye ’n' Jesy.” 

He turns to face Louis, “yeah. Got her number from Jade.” 

“She beat ye up ‘nd ye took her out on a date?” Louis laughs, jumping down on his bed.

Calum shrugs, “she got a good swing on that cricket thing.” 

“She did ring yer bell pretty bad.” Louis says, he hardly remembers what happened between Calum and the others, only that Liam at some point rushed over to help out Jesy. But if he heard right, Jesy’s first hit was to swing her cricket bat against Calum’s groin.

“Yeah,” Calum shrugs. “Never met a girl that could beat me, you know?” A small secretive smile crosses his face. “She’s amazing.” For a second he doesn’t say anything, momentarily thinking if he should tell Louis this part. “Had to get away from my dad this summer. His preachings got more and more painful. Like Jesy kept trying to say that love is love and all that stuff. And in a different life she might have been a boy too, would I kick her off my bed then. I mean probably, but you get the picture right?”

Louis nods, thinking of Harry sitting on his bed. “Yeah.” He’d be attracted to Harry as a boy and a girl alike. 

“And my dad kept preaching to his flock that it’s all wrong. Then I thought of you and Liam and Niall, how you all stood up for Harry. And Jesy, how she came into my life. Maybe there was a reason for her to literally knock my brain straight, you know?” 

Louis nods, again, “sure.”

“So I ran for it, hid in Hemming’s boot. He and his family were going camping, I simply hitched a ride. When they found me hidden, I just joined their trip and after they drove me to the train station, so I could drive to Manchester, see Jesy. I’ve really tried to better myself. I really am sorry for attacking you all the time. I tried talking to Ashton about it, but he just thinks it’s gross and inhuman.” Calum scraps at his short stubbly black hair.

“If gay’s were wrong, why did God put the male G-spot in t’ bum?” Louis says. Calum blinks at him a couple of times, before he starts snickering. 

It’s not a full laugh, but it’s closer than Louis ever got with him. “You know I’ll use that on my dad, we’ll see what he thinks of that.” Louis starts laughing too.

“Dear Lord, thank you for providing this meal for us, may it be nurturing and for-filling for us. And thank you for the lovely Johanna for preparing this delicious food. And may you look over us, all of us and help my son find his way back to righteousness and tare down his walls of rebellion. Help him back on the path you paved for us. Amen.“Tension starts to rise between Calum and the preacher.

Before the rest of the group can say Amen, Daisy interjects “and thank you, God, that there are no more disgusting eggs in my salad, Amen.” 

“DAISY.” Jay says shocked. Louis snickers into his salad, looking at Fizzy who is giving Daisy a low five underneath the table.

“So what’s your dad’s problem with you?” Lottie asks Calum.

“My girlfriend. My life. Everything.” Calum grunts.

“That makes all sense then.” Fizzy says under her breath.

“Leave ‘im alone.” Louis says, stuffing some tomatoes into his mouth. 

Phoebe leans over Louis and stares up at Calum, “Can you play football, Cal?”

“I’m in your brothers team. Maybe you can cheer me on next time, rather than this gimp.” He knocks his shoulder against Louis. 

“Loyalty is important, Pheebs.” Louis warns. 

“We’re learning to play footie too!” Daisy says from across the table. 

Fizzy stares down at her, “you are ballerinas!” 

“Louis is teaching us!” Daisy says, bouncing on her chair. “He says it’s important for girls to be more interesting than just make-up.” Lottie pulls a face from the insult, Fizzy simply chuckles.

“Right you are, and soon I will build you two a goal so that we can practice in the garden.”

“You will do no such thing.” Jay interjects, just as she puts her hand over her wineglass, so that the preacher can’t fill it. “Look at the state of my garden, I won’t have any grass left if you keep playing football there.”

Louis leans down to Phoebe, “never stopped us before did it?” She shakes her head with an adorable amount of concentration. Calum chuckles next to him. 

“You could go to wood tech class, get some drift wood from them.” 

“Gran’ idea, thanks mate.” Calum grins and fist pumps Phoebe. “I think I’m bonding with your sisters, can I have one of them. Maybe dad can fuss over them.”

“They come’n twos.” Louis says lamely.

“Exactly, give me one, keep the other.” Calum grins, “I’ll take her.” He points at sweet Phoebe, who beams at him. “The other one is too feisty, dad would have a heart attack from her.”

“Sorry, Calum, get your own sister, we keep these ones.” Fizzy cuddles a kicking Daisy to her chest. A water glass falls over and spill over their mum’s festive tablecloth. Phoebe looks jealous, so Louis cuddles her into his own side, scratching her ticklish chin.

“Daisy! Fizzy! Watch out, would ye?” Their mother leans over to throw some paper towels on the wet spot.

“Just making sure that Calum don’t take our little ones away.” Fizzy says.

“I have to agree with you on that. They are the light of my life.” Jay says, winking at them.

“Sa rude.” Louis mumbles. His mother gives him a curd look.

💚🍑💙

“Aye? Where the fuck are my chips?” A customer, who has chosen to sit down to have is meal, screams at Louis. 

Louis turns around to him, after he finished moping up one of the tables. “Me names not aye, it’s excuse me.” He walks back to the counter. 

Louis’ customer turns around “the kebab going to be cold at this rate.” 

The bald guy from last time, who it turns out is named Liam Dooley, grins and fills a small bucket with chips, “good chips take 7 minutes.” He calls over to the customer. With a shaker he puts the finishing touch of flavouring spice to it. With a large spoon he hoists them on a plate, and winks when he slides it over to Louis. He rolls his eyes and gives it to the grumbling customer. 

Louis walks back to the counter, “cheers.” 

“You’ll get used to the customers. At this time their normally more drunk, needy. But if you get an afternoon shift, they get a little more expecting.”

“Righ’.” Louis shifts a bit on his feet.

“Let me guess? You haven’t told anyone you work here yet?” Dooley asks him.

Louis shakes his head, “don’t knaw wha’ they’ll think.”

Dooley shrugs his shoulders, “at the beginning my friends gave me a little shit for it, said I was broke, but then they thought it was pretty swag that their friend worked at the Fish&Chips store. This has revenue, lad.”

“Hope yer right Dooley.” Louis turns around to the next customer, “wha’ can I get ye?”

The next day, Louis is back at school, when a girl in the back of the line says “something reeks like chips.” Louis can feel the cold shower of shame again, he’s not sure why he’s so embarrassed of people knowing he works for Bell’s when it’s a really good job. He’s earning 10 pounds the hour, which mean per night he earns about 40 quid.

“Oh god, I hate it when the cafeteria serves that fat-making shit.” Alana, one of Eleanor’s friends, complains.

“Yeah, let’s keep survivin’ on water an' spite!” Louis retorts annoyed, not even turning around completely to face her.

“Oh my, is it you that smells this bad?” One of the girls pulls up her nose. It reminds him of Harry a bit, but he only does it when he tries to hide his fond, generally a positive trait, rather than this measuring up of disgust.

“Yeah, bathed in some fish ’n' chips before I came in.” Louis rolls his eyes. He had to shower three times in order to get the deep-fry smell off of his skin. Besides it being extremely draining, it was quite fun. Dooley, it turned out, was quite a hoot. ( _Harry would appreciate the thought._ )

“Do you know how much calories fish and chips have? People like you are the reason for ugly and fat people …” Alana starts rambling. 

“Alright, alright, wha’ am I sayin’?” Louis turns back to the coffee stand. 

“Next.” Louis quickly orders for himself, Eleanor definitely has her own Starbucks in her hands already.

“Ye girls need a life…” Louis says, before he heads to the lower floor of the building. After a few moments he stands in front of the wood tech building.He pushes open the door, inside there’s a loud noise. People are plying wood, some are scraping at a trunk of wood to make cups and wooden spoons. 

“Tommo!” Niall grins at him. 

Louis leisurely sips on his coffee, “didn’t kna ye took wood tech, mate?”

“Harry takes it, so I thought it could be fun.” He points to a hunched over figure. The curls held in by multiple headbands, giving him around four buns around his head. 

“What’re ye workin’ on than?” 

“A hole.”

“A what?” Niall points to the hole in the wall. Louis cocks his head to look at it. “Looks beautiful mate.” 

Niall chuckles, “actually my own project is done, so I can do what ever I want right now.” He walks around his desk, so that they are facing Harry again. Niall holds up a four 90 degreed angled boomerangs.

“Ye made boomerangs?” Louis asks.

“No.” Niall lets out another rolling laugh.“They’re the ends to a picture frame.” He holds up another small frame. “Still have to attach it to this, but the American is hogging the hot glue gun.”

“Ah! Thank God that actually makes sense,” Louis snickers. Another chortled laugh erupts over to Louis. He faces the sound, and sees Harry pressing his hand over his mouth. Their eyes meet and Harry’s eyes dissolve into another hateful glare. He’s working on something that looks like a tiny house.

“Excuse me, why are you holding up my students?” A pretty woman asks to his right.

“Hi.” He grins, dislodging his eyes from the beautiful green. “I want to build afootie-goal for me baby sisters, could I have some drift wood?”

“Are you in wood tech, yourself?” The pretty teacher asks him.

“Sadly not, ma’am.” Louis pouts.

“I’m sorry, the wood here is only for students that actually take wood tech. You’ll have to buy it yourself.” She says with a faux sadness. “Now please let my students return to their work.” 

“Pretty please.” Louis pouts more furious, holding his hands under his chin and leaning forward like puss in boots from Shrek. 

“That’s all very cute and probably works on your girlfriend and parents alike, but sadly not with me. There’s the door, blue eyes.” 

“Was worth a try,” Louis says, gives Niall a clap on the back and walks off to the door. He turns around again to meet Harry’s beautiful eyes, while he turns around to him. His eyes much softer than before, Harry always had a soft spot for the twins. The door falls closed on Harry’s eyes.

Liam disagrees again, it’s quite infuriating. “No, Louis, you can’t make me.”

“Come on, slip in ‘nd out in a sec.” 

“We’re stealing from the school.” Liam argues, flopping his arms about, as if that would help.

“It’s just wood tech, do ye actually think they count t spare parts?” Louis rolls his eyes for the hundredth time since they sat down in the cafeteria hall.

“I’ll do it.” Zayn says, while observing the carrot on his fork. 

“No, thanks.” Louis shoots him down. Yes, he apologised. Yes, he looks like shit this thin. Yes, he obviously is a black sheep of term right now, his proposal had spread like wildfire after Taylor overheard Perrie talking about it in science class. But there was this small part of Louis that felt hurt to every corner of his heart. Zayn called him a fat ass ( _that’s true_ ), a dick face ( _maybe true_ ) and the one that hurt the most a _fucking queer asshole_. And while all of his apologies in the park had made sense, the fact that Zayn would judge him for kissing a bloke hurt the most. He doesn’t even know if Zayn remembers this, _probably not_. But Louis would never ever say it out loud, then he’d have to have the talk with Zayn. And he’s not willing to come out to Zayn right now, when their friendships is this fragile anyway.

“Well, I’m not stealing from the school.” 

“God, you’re such a bore, Payne.” Jade says while she and Perrie pass their table. “Don’t know what you are on about, but I’m in.” She tells Louis, gives Zayn a harsh look, making her dislike for him clear. 

“Of course you are.” Perrie says, and follows Jade to a different table.

“It’s why you love me.” Jade grins over her shoulder giving Louis a wink. Louis freezes in the spot, _are they out?_ Zayn shift uncomfortable next to Liam. A hand sneaks up on his knee, Zayn can see Liam holding him steady. The carrot is forgotten again.

Leigh-Anne stops at their table as well, but concentrates on Louis rather than on her hate for Zayn, “hey, I’m in the play too, we should get together some time and practice.” 

“Too?” Louis can’t remember seeing Leigh at the auditions. His cheeks heat up when he sees the other stare at him, Liam’s chin almost landing in his food.

“The list is up, did you not know this. You got a spot!” Leigh says, blinking at him with her eyelashes excitedly.

Louis feels his heart doing summer salts, “shit really? God, I ‘ave t’ see. Stay ‘ere.” He tells the boys and quickly gets up to beam out the door. Belatedly he returns, “where are they?”

“The board outside the teacher’s lounge.”

“Gran’, cheers.” Louis runs to the teacher’s lounge. Someone tells him to slow down and another teacher screams ‘no running’. He stares at the piece of paper that tells him that Leigh-Anne Pinnock is going to play Romy. Danielle Campbell will be Juliet. Taylor Swift will play Juliet’s mother. And Louis will play Ben, the cousin/best friend/confidant of Juliet. _YES! I got it!_ Louis makes a quick victory dance before returning to eat his lunch.

“Congrats.” Liam whispers and gives him a kiss on the cheek. Eleanor, who had joined them while Louis was gone, doesn’t even pretend to be jealous or annoyed.

“You should have told me.” Eleanor whispers to him when the boys left them alone.

“Why?” Louis asks, a tad annoyed.

“You’re my boyfriend, how do you think it looks when I don’t know about this.” Eleanor says.

“Please don’t dampen t’is. Don’t make it about yerself.” Louis says.

“I’m not. It just looks bad.” Eleanor pouts.

“Alright, just sa ye know, I work for Lightening Bell’s.” Louis says, stands up and leaves to get to Biology. Eleanor is staring after him, mouth ajar, displeasure written all over her face. Green eyes follow the scene, with a tinge of confusion bubbling in his gut.

Louis is standing behind the counter again. It’s a Friday afternoon, almost all his friends were going out tonight, but Louis was earning his forty quid. He and Eleanor had had their first fight since their arraignment had started. Louis had taken into town square, so she could go out with her friend Rachel, who was just another copy of Eleanor. She had told him how Louis’ job looked bad and made his popularity pole drive into the ground. He had argued that he needed money to pay for the sixth former’s trip. She had said she’d pay for it. _But that was one too many picks at me pride. I’m not a sugar baby!_ He had simply kicked her out of Bertie.

“You look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders.” Timothy, the guy with the blonde man-bun, says.

“Me bird don’t like me working ‘ere.” Louis says. He doesn’t want to meet Tim’s dark eyes. “She wants to give me t’ peas instead.”

“Like a call-boy?” Timothy reads his mind.

“So I didn’t overreact?” Louis asks, flaying his hands about. His feet are crossed while he leans against the oven.

“Nah mate, don’t let a bird push you about.” Timothy agrees. The door opens, and they both look over out of instinct. There’s a group of teens entering, and to Louis dismay he immediately recognises the beautiful curls of one of the boys. He’s wearing his black tight pants, worn-out leather Chelsea boots and a beige shirt with red and golden motorcycles on them. _Shit._ “From your college?” Timothy asks. Harry and his friends Jade, Leigh-Anne, Niall, Barbara, a boy named Brett, Danielle (the American), and Nick. _What’s that prick doing here again?_

“Yeah. Betta face the music, yeah?” Louis looks at Timothy for comfort. 

“Give him hell.” Tim says.

Louis grabs three menus and walks over to the group. “Hey, wha’ can I get ye?” The group turns to look at him. Harry’s mouth goes into awe, and Nick is about to burst out laughing. _Would it be wrong to strangle him with Harry’s hair?_

“Tommo! No way…” Jade squeaks. “You work here?” 

Louis lifts his little notepad, “won’t give ye a discount even if ye beg on yer knees.” Niall laughs. “Ye need any drinks?” They order a few cokes, a few beers, one water and Harry mumbles when Louis’ eyes fixate on him. “What?” 

“A… cider, please.” Harry says as slow as ever. Louis just nods, he tries to erase the memory of Harry’s lovely face, and how the pimples on his forehead didn’t take away his beauty in the slightest. He walks back to the counter, getting everything together. 

“Alright?” Timothy asks. Louis just nods, sighing he pushes his index finger and thumb into his eye-socket.

“Hey!” Louis turns around to look at Jade.

“Hey.” Louis says.

“I think it’s amazing that you work here. I mean that you are working at all. You have football three to four times a week, and the play two times a week. I think it’s amazing that you are becoming independent, I think it’s class.” 

“Thanks, Jade.” Louis says, “I… this might be a bit embarrassin’, but I need the money ta nip tha’ college leave.” Understanding softens Jade’s features. “Don’t tell Nick.” 

Jade turns to look at the group, “why would I tell him?”

“He doesn’t like me much.” Louis says. His stomach drops when he watches Nick make Harry laugh, his eyes crinkling around his eyes.

Jade shrugs. “I won’t… I…” she drags her left hand through her hair. “I wanted to say that I appreciate what you did in Ibiza. No one blames you for what happened.” Louis can hear her gulp. “It’s internally Zayn’s fault and you don’t have to cut yourself off from everyone.”

“That why everyone is staring at Zayn like he’s a zoo animal? Someone found out?”

“Taylor overheard Perrie and Leigh talking about it in Chem. She also knows you were with us. You don’t have to pull back from everyone. Bitch is telling lies.” Jade says, thumping her hand on the counter.

“I don’t actually kna what she’s been saying, been concentratin’ on other things.” Louis confesses while he fills a coke glass.

Jade watches him, step to the side to get another glass going “right. She just said to the American that you helped pick out the ring, and then someone found out, you actually told Zayn’s uncle about him, and snitched. It’s obviously all lies.”

“I did call his uncle.” Louis says, stomach pooling with shame again.

“I know that. But not to snitch. Louis I was there, I know everything, me and Pez have been crushing her bullshit. You can come out with us again.” Jade tries to smile.

“I’ma not hiding.” Louis says, trying to hide the pout.

“Eleanor literally had to fake call you to get you to come to Niall’s party.” Jade laughs.

“That has different reasons.” Louis scratches his head, the drinks are done and he don’t know what to do with his hands again.

“Just know, no one blames you, and we’d love it if you come back to our parties. I actually don’t know why… I just wanted to say we’re not going anywhere, and everyone understands if you were sceptical around Zayn.” S _ceptical! Huh, that’s a funny way to say it._

“Thanks, Jade.” Louis says again, he’s not sure what else to say. Timothy rolls his eyes and takes the beverages to hand it over at the table. 

“Harry misses you too.” Jade suddenly says, after they watched Timothy slide over the water toward the American and get out his notepad to take down their orders.

“Wha’?” Louis’ eyes bog out of his sockets. Jade giggles, pulling her hand through her hair again. “We don’t have anythin’ t’ say to each other.”

“I think he’d disagree.” Jade says. “Anyway, I love you, Louis. For everything you do.” She hugs him over the counter, and sniffles a little into his hair. “Wow, you really do reek of chips.”

“Fuck off.” Louis pokes her into her sides. She’s not ticklish, so she just slaps away his finger. “Louve ye too.” She smiles and pokes his nose. “For everything you are."

Five minutes later, Louis delivers the kebabs, fish and chips, fiery chips, etc to the table. When he slides over Harry’s chips with tartar sauce, he notices a white bandana around his neck like a necklace. He’d love to tuck on it, guid him into the staff bathroom… _doesn’t matter._

“They’re being nice.” Timothy notices as Louis wipes down the counter for the millionth time today, busying himself so he’s not so invested looking over at the curly haired bloke tucked into Nick’s side. 

“Yeah, they’re not the bullies of the school.” Louis says. “If they come aroun’, I might hide behind the counter.” 

“Love to see that mate.” He looks Louis up and down, something he hopes Harry sees and gets jealous. “You’re small enough to fit into that cupboard.”He points to a small cabinet below the counter. Louis laughs, throwing his head back. He claps his hands together. 

“Gran’ one.” He looks over to see Harry watching him, the grease puffs out his lips even more. Slithering, sleek and _oh God my cock used to be between them._ Louis grabs his groin to adjust himself. 

He walks back over, “ye all happy, need anything more?” 

“Yeah how about that discount?“ Niall says while sucking on his finger.

“Yer not.” Louis says. “I don’t like ye much.” Niall bombards Louis with his used and greasy paper towels.

“You love me you dickward.” Louis laughs while he ducks away from the ammunition. Harry helpfully holds up his fries, so that Louis can throw some at Niall’s forehead. But Niall loves to eat, so he just catches them with his mouth and starts eating them.

“Gran’ try, Harold. Guess we underestimated 'is stomach.” Louis says, there is a small smile on Harry’s lips. A cute beautiful curl wraps itself around his earlobe. Louis wants to tuck it and see if it bounces back on its own. Louis can feel Nick’s hazel eyes on them. “Hey Nick, mind if we talk?”

“You allowed to?” Nick asks, a sneer in his voice.

“Takin’ me break.” He pulls out a cigarette and gives Timothy a sign that he’s taking a quick smoke. He walks out front and waits for Nick. He had been seated in the middle of the small dinner table,so he had to climb over a couple of people to get out.

“Got one for me?” Nick asks.

“Yeah sure.” He pulls one out for him. 

“Cheers.” Nick is watching him with slitted eyes.

“Sorry we got off on t’ wrong foot.” Louis says in between to smokes. “It was me.”

“What was?” 

“Yer cousin’s room. It was me.” Louis says. 

Nick turns to face him properly, “you know how much shit I have been in for that?”

“Sorry about that.” Louis says, almost nonchalant. “I just… I want to cope up ta it. I ‘ave this job naw, I’ll get ye the 200 quid by winter break, promise. Just need a little time.”

“Why would I just take that answer? Why shouldn’t I go ballistic and I don’t know demand the money now?” Nick asks, he’s not really that mad. He got into a shit tone of trouble from his aunt when she came back, mostly because of that damn window. But he didn’t actually care about all that, there had been worse things that he had done this summer.

“If ye didn’t at least give me a chance to reverse me mistake, Harry would hate ye.” Louis says, there’s a small smile on his face. Nick definitely has a crush on Harry, who wouldn’t. 

“Sweet suffering Jesus.” Nick complains, a laugh breaks out of him as his head falls against the brick wall behind him. His eyes turn on him, “I ain’t got a chance with him.”

Louis takes his last drag from his cigarette. His face remains mimic-less, while the smoke blows around him. “Betta get back inside, before me boss comes back.” Nick nods, unsure if his point has come across. 

“I’ll give you till winter break.” Nick says.

“Cheers mate.” Louis lets the door slide closed behind him, Nick’s still taking his last drag.  


“You okay?” Timothy asks for the thousands time that day.

“Of course.” Louis grins. “Need some chips, though, so get frying.” Louis is craving some really hot crispy chips.

Sunday morning, Louis wakes up with the permission slip glaring at him next to the drawing of Harry. Louis moans when he rubs his hand through his hair. If he asks his mother to sign the permission slip, she’s going to know about the 250 quid they have to come up with to fund this damn trip. 

He walks over and knocks on the door of the underworld, the door is locked. “Who is it?” The girl asks.

“Yer big brother.” There is some shuffling and the door unlocks. Antonia, Fizzy’s friend, grabs his hand and pulls him into the room. He stumbles and feels like a baby giraffe, when he knocks into the desk chair. Antonia sits back down next to his sister. There’s a lot of fabric everywhere. “What are ye doin’?”

“Hey, good to see ye too. Didn’t miss you at dinner or breakfast at all.” Fizzy lightly says.

“Me queen,” Louis bows to her in a Japanese manner, he turns to Antonia “me devil.” 

They nod in unison. “Speak, civilian of ours.” 

“I need ye to forge mum’s signature for me permission slip.” He holds out the paper.

“Why aren’t ye going to give it to mum herself?” Fizzy asks, while she pulls her thread through two operate t-shirts.

“I’m tryin’ ta fund it meself, so she can’t kna about ‘till, I got all the peas. She knows about the trip, just not how much it’s going to cost her. Besides Lottie is sixth form too, sa she ‘as to pay double.” Louis says.

“Get me a pen.” Fizzy smiles. Louis rummages through her desk, and pulls out a pen. She signs it, her signature was perfect.

“Cheers.” He takes the permission slip. “What are ye doing?” 

“It’s going to be a quilt, for mum and Dan, Christmas present. Dan helped me get souvenir t-shirts from all over their honeymoon.”

“Argh… ‘ate it when yer t’ perfect babby.” Louis moans before he moves over to the door. Antonia gets up again to lock the door behind him. 

“You just hate knowing yer not the favourite any more.” Fizzy grins evil.

💚🍑💙

Louis is sitting on the grass, drenched in sweat from top to bottom. He has been giving his all the last two hours. It’s the week Coach was giving someone the captains badge, and Louis will double his efforts just to impress him in the last practices. Louis needed this, he wanted this. So did Ashton, they were constantly besting each other. He can’t even imagine what will happen if he doesn’t get this. Just the memory of Harry's banged up jaw cuts into his heart like a blade. _Ashton cannot win!!_

“You’re pushing yourself really hard the past week.” Liam tries to calm him. He’s breathing harsher too, he would gladly give up a captains badge, but he’s doing everything in his power to slow down Ashton.

“Cheers.” Louis says and falls on his back. He’s huffing out a long breath, to try and even out his breathing.

“You got a really good shot at this Louis.” Liam tries harder to convince Louis, he’s been saying the same thing for the last couple of days, though.

“Ashton does too.” They look over to see Ashton red-faced hunching over and breathing like a whale.

“You’re doing all this for Harry?”

“No. For the entire school. Haz isn’t the only minority there.” Louis says, but they both know he’s mostly doing it for Harry.

“Right. Saviour of us all.” Liam grins.

“Ah expect ye t' call me that from now on.” Louis smiles, and sips from a water bottle that Niall throws at his head. 

“Not even elected and already pompous.” Liam complains. Before Louis can retort something funny, the team collectively sits up. 

Coach chuckles before he starts talking. “I’m seeing some promising work out there, don’t forget to stretch everyone and go home to your mothers.”

“Coach? What about Captains?” Steer, the goalie, asks. Louis blatantly realises that he’s in his last year at the Crusaders too, he might actually have a shot as well. Were Ashton and Louis too focused on their rivalry that they failed to notice others had a chance too? What happens if neither wins? What happens if one gets co and the other gets nothing? Louis involuntary shivers,he blames it on the cold air and his sweaty skin.

“Ah I was wondering why you all were listening so well. Is it time already?” The team groans. “Just joking, I will choose captains tomorrow. Go home, the lot of you.” With a loud grumble, the team starts moving. The showers are too hot today and Louis’ skin is turning to a vibrant red when he steps out. He can feel Ashton’s eyes on him.

“Not interested, brov.” Louis whispers into his ear while he passes him, securing a green towel around his hip.

“Tomorrow you’re going to stop laughing, mate. You can join your little fag then! This time no one will aid you in protecting that whorish cunt.” Ashton screams into the chaining room. 

“Be careful who ye call a whore, yer t’ one soliciting’ ‘is cock!” Louis shoots back. Ashton growls like a hurt dog, but Callum has a hand on his chest and pushes him back, whispering into his ear.

“Just you wait till tomorrow.” Ashton finishes the conversation.

“He betta not be right.” Louis says to Liam and Niall, who agree, still facing the steam of the showers and concern written over their faces. And Louis can see it in Liam’s brow, how worried he is not for Harry, but for Louis. Louis loses team captain, he falls down the social ladder, he’ll be the gay sympathiser. He’ll receive the same treatment, maybe even worse.

The rest of the Monday is hell. He bounces on his feet like a beach ball, he smashes three plates by accident and drives to work without having shift. After he picks up his mother at the hospital by accident, the twins surprise him by wanting to play footie. They create a make shift goal with two rocks and Louis tries to divert his nerves by playing ball with his sisters. At least they are having fun, and when Louis sits down at dinner, his muscles are humming soothingly.

Tuesday at school is horrible. Louis can’t stop thinking about practice and to abound Ashton takes their rivalry to the college hallway. Louis escapes a textbook flying past him after biology, while Callum pushes him out of the way. Ashton gets distracted by Callum’s ‘un-brov-like’ behaviour and chews him out, leaving Louis the opportunity to round him and pull down his pants. The fact that Ashton wears polka dot underwear soon gives him the new nickname Dotty. 

Ashton is understandably unhappy with this and starts a food fight with Louis during lunch, which grants them a visit to the nurse, because Ms. Cole mistook the ketch up for blood. Louis slips a very bad smelling cheese, that had started growing in Niall’s unused locker, into Ashton’s at the end of the day. He is running away from there when he sees Harry, he’s talking to his arch enemy Cow-hell. Harry nods a couple of times, while Cow-hells arms are extending towards the beautiful boy. Louis veins go cold, he’s brushing Harry’s arm and squeezing, before dropping it down low enough to touch Harry’s gorgeous bum. Harry is giggling, when Louis turns away, with a scare in his heart. He’s taken out cold, when Ashton appears out of nowhere and gets a load of frying oil hit into his face, with a stupid remark about his job. Louis is more than disgusted when he showers before practice, pore Bertie, he curses while hoping that the car’s seat survives this debauchery.

Practice is intense, not only for the hardship of the decision coming forward but also because the fight between Louis and Ashton in school has travelled all the way onto the pitch. Louis can feel the shift in energy, when the team comes to terms with the background promises of the fight. To his delight, most of the team stands behind him, and they try to show it in front of coach. Maybe that is why at the end of practice, coach finally lets them know his decision. “There are a few characters here that have the potential of being captains and leadership material. Irwin, Payne, Steer and Tomlinson. I had my mind set up. How long were you here? How good are you?How much do you want this? But today something happened, that changed my decision. Today one of these four showed to me that he has the potential of uniting this entire litter.” Winston holds up an armband, which has ‘Captain’ written across it. “Let me introduce… drum roll please.” The boys start clapping their hands on their thighs, Louis is randomly reminded of Headmaster Higgins while his drumroll eye roll. “… Captain Tomlinson!” 

Louis’ head hits the grass painfully, his visions swims and his hands grab at something wet. Most of the team has landed on top of him and congratulating him, petting his head and hitting him in the gut. Louis can feel the utter relief rush through him. He untangles him and shyly walks over to coach, taking the armband from his fingers. “Cheers.” 

“Don’t screw it up.” Winston whispers into his ear.

“Speech!” Dan screams. 

“Yes, speech, saviour of all!” Liam chuckles, starting a chant.

“I’ma glad t’ be yer new ruler. I will rule with an iron nieve, no one will laugh ’n all of ye are summoned every Monday, Tuesday ‘n Thursdays.”

“Schedule as usual then?” Niall grins, he’s already chewing on something. That reminds Louis.

“Oh ‘n weekends, you can all find me whippin’ me wand at the lush Bell’s Fish and Chips.” The boys cheer again and Louis does a bow worthy of any Broadway show.

“Alright, well done Tommo.” Winston grins and pets him on the back. The boys let another wave of cheers wash through them. “Yes yes, well done him. BUT there is one more position.” Everyone goes quiet immediately. “There has been some miscommunications before, and I want to make this very clear! Co-Captain is not equal to Captain! The Co, only takes charge when Captain isn’t there! Captain always trumps Co, think of cockpits.” Winston is holding up a finger like he’s Dumbledore reminding them not to enter the forbidden forest. “Please welcome, your co-captain…” drum roll starts again. “Irwin.”Louis loses the battle with his knees and falls to the floor. His bum hurts, and he’s staring up at Irwin getting a handshake from Winston. _Shit,_ Louis really hoped that Liam would be Co. But he obviously didn’t want it enough.

“Fuck the agreement!” Ashton is screaming inside the changing room. 

“Ye really want ta add dishonesty to the list of yer many fuck-ups?” Louis bellows back. How could he be so stupid and believe that Ashton would stick to his word. The truce had been a small breather for everyone, didn’t mean the tyrant was ready to leave his position.

Ashton’s hands ball up, and he bounces the smaller boy against the wall. Louis can feel pain shoot through his back. He moans while his hand reaches for the back of his head again. _That hurt more than the grass for sure._ “Remember the kicks and giggles…” Ashton’s voice deepens.

“Think about yer nose Ash.” Louis retorts and tries to ignore the taste of iron on his tongue.

“Fuck my nose, this isn’t about my nose.” Ashton is towering over him again, and this time a seer of fear shoots through him. But it’s gone as quickly as a shooting star, replaced by anger, _how dare this coward not stand to his word?_

“What ye gonna do. Cry to yer mamy about it, she ain’t want ye, same as daddy. He just fucks off to get ye off ‘is mind.” Louis says. Ashton’s nostrils blare so wide, that Louis is reminded of the bull again, there’s a small piece of snot hanging from his nose hair. “Mate ye got somethin’ there.” Louis can’t help himself. Ashton blinks a few times, while Louis points to his own nose with his pinky and makes a flick motion.

Ashton is shortly occupied by Louis odd behaviour, which allows Calum to get between them, pushing Louis further against the wall and Ashton away from it. “You made a bet Ash. And you lost.” He pushes him away from Louis.

“This isn’t over Tommo, this ain’t over.” He calls over his shoulder. Liam and Niall take him into a tight hug and Louis sniffles Niall’s hair. 

“Yer definitely bleachin’ that.” Louis says. 

“Weirdo.” Niall laughs, “your so random, mate.” 

“A wee bit.” Louis tries to copy Niall’s Irish accent, failing miserably by the looks on his teammate’s faces.

“You’re bleeding a bit.” Liam tells him and grabs a warm cloth to press to Louis mouth.

“Bit on me tongue, ah think.” Louis says and finally understands the sting on the right side of his tongue and the iron in his mouth.

When he comes home Jay, Dan and the girls are waiting in the kitchen for him. There’s a pink cake between them, which reads, ‘Go Louis’. Louis laughs and happily blows out the candles. “What would ye 'ave done if I didn’t get it?” He asks ten minutes later around a mouth full. His mother had allowed them to eat cake, and only cake, in front of the TV tonight. 

“Lottie had a can ready with more icing, the twins would have distracted you while we would have changed the G into a B.” 

“So it would have read Boo Louis!” Daisy giggles, while she curls into his lap. Louis laughs while he watches Fizzy braid Phoebes hair. 

Jay leans forward to place her plate on the coffee table. “We might have gotten a head’s up from Liam.” She whispers into his ear while giving him a kiss on his temple. 

“Traitor.” Louis shakes his head. Jay giggles.

“One more mum?” Lottie asks, she already dislodged another piece from the mother pieces. 

“No, thanks dear. Feeling a tad sick.” She presses her hand on her stomach.

“Yer loosing yer charm.” Lottie shakes her head, teasing her mother with a wink.

“Ungrateful bunch.” Jay teases right back.

Louis finally has some luck, because of football his schedule for after school activities is limited. Add two times a week at Bell’s to the equation, and he almost has no time at all. His luck, he finds, is the rehearsals for the play are on Wednesday, one of his rare free footie days, and on Fridays. He tells Corden that he can’t go to every Friday meet, because he has footie games on some of them. Corden doesn’t mind. “Louis we’ll just put rehearsals with you as Ben on Wednesdays, and on Fridays you can work on your songs.” Louis has some luck after all.

After leaving Drama class, Louis skips through school. He sits down at the rotunda, to listen to Harry’s deep voice beam through the Choir room. “There’s no choir practice today.” Liam says, Louis hadn’t noticed that he was sitting there. 

“Ms. Cole is sick.” A girl with black hair and an hourglass figure says. Her name is Sophia and Louis sits an aisle apart from her in Maths. A few months ago there was a rumour that she had a crush on Liam, but everyone knows Liam don’t cheat.

“Hi Sophia.” Louis says and lights a cig, nonetheless. “How do ye kna that?”

“Liam joined the Choir!” Sophia cheers.

Louis laughs, “ye didn’t wear that hip-hop shite, did ye?” He has the image of Liam in his baggy clothes in front of him, and Harry’s sad face. It haunts him a little. Especially since he had framed Zayn’s picture of him on that day.

“No, I went in uniform. Harry said it would be best, show her I’m a solid addition.” Liam nods to himself, as if he needed to reaffirm this fact with himself.

“Grand.” Louis grin. “So, ah, when is yer first performance?” He tries to sound nonchalant, but even to his own ears he sounds fake.

“Why you want to see?” Sophia interjects, none the wiser. Louis isn’t sure if he likes her budding in. He’s not the excluding type, but he has no connection with her whatsoever.

“Of course.” Louis drags his cigarette, “ye comin’ to all my performances 'n I’ll do the same for ye.”

“This Friday.” Liam says simply.

“Wha'? Sa early, why wouldn’t ye tell me?” Louis sits up and gives Liam a curt look.

“You didn’t tell me about your job.” Liam deadpans, below his usual tone there’s a little hurt in his voice. 

“You work at Bell’s right?” Sophia asks, Louis really want to ignore her.

“I do.” Louis tells her. “Where is it?”

“It’s just a competition between the colleges of the county, nothing big.” Liam retracts. 

“None sense, I will be there.” Louis grins. He steps out his cigarette, thrusting his phone in Liam’s direction, “go on then, typoa the det’s.”

“You’re sounding like your girlfriend.” Liam pouts over the abbreviation of details, and starts typing. Louis rolls his eyes at Sophia, and she smiles good-natured.

“Ye make that sound like an insult. I’ll have ye know she’s sweet and fun.” Liam doesn’t react, just types away, but Sophia awe’s. “I think we better get going, before Mr. Walsh misses you in geography.”

The three walk back inside, Louis is trying to get to his locker to get his English books, when they run head first into a confrontation. Ashton, Calum, Luke Hemmings and Michael Clifford are standing inside a circle, looking hatefully at a curly haired boy. Louis’ heart stutters in fear. He should have known that the three peaceful days since Coach’s decision had only meant Ashton’s temper was rising like yeast.

Louis can see Harry quite clearly where he is standing. His spine is straight and there is a death stare in his green eyes, but he’s outnumbered. Louis quickly stumbles past the gathering group and reaches to Harry’s side at the same time as Niall.

“Stop. Ash.” Niall says. 

“You standing up for him? That’s rich.” Ashton bloated himself up.

“Fuck you, Ashton. Fuck you and your homophobic bullshit.” Harry defends.

“You miss my cock, baby.” Ashton laughs, earning him a few misplaced giggles from some girls in the circle surrounding them. Louis recognises one of them as Eleanor’s friend Alana.

“Stand down, Ashton.” Louis warns. Harry shifts, allowing Louis to crowd into his space.

“What you think I'm just going to stop because your captain? I’m co, that makes me captain when you’re not around. Coaches word. No one wins, bitch.” _Fuck, Coach should have explained that differently._

“Ye called me bitch? Odd considerin’ that ye are the twat.” Louis throws back, unintelligently.

“At least I don’t defend the wrong team.” Ashton points towards Harry, Louis can feel him take a deep breath.

“Not on the wrong team, mate. Just defending against fast cum-ing pricks.” Louis settles the insult neatly into his comeback.

“You sure you’re not a fag yourself, want his fat cock-sucking lips around you? Must be real hard being this close to him and that far away from his hole…” Louis doesn’t wait any longer. He throws himself head fist against Ashton. They both tumble to the ground, but this time Louis does not have a baseball bat.

Distantly he can hear Harry breath “Lou!” Ashton grabs his middles and kicks against his stomach, making his small body fly. A loud clack can be heard when Louis’ back hits the locker. 

“TOMLINSON! IRVIN. OFFICE NOW.” Louis looks up to see Mr Cowell standing inside a door, staring down at his students.

Louis gets up and rubs his spine painfully. He can see Harry rush away, and Niall hot on his heals. Liam gives him a nod, while Sophia is clutching to his side, a hand over her mouth.

“He threw me against a locka.” Louis defends himself, while he and Ashton sit across from Cow-hell’s desk. 

“He started it.” Ashton says.

“Did not. He was attackin’ Harry.” Louis faces Ashton with squinting eyes.

“Don’t be under any illusion, I don’t give a fuck about some fag walking these corridors. But there’s no fighting on school grounds!” Cow-hell says deep voiced and bored. “You both get detention, Friday!” 

“But Sir.” Louis says in shock. He was meant to have a shift on Friday. He misses Friday, he might not get all the money together for the school trip. He will have to beg Geoff, his boss, to give him more shifts during term break.

“I don’t care, Tomlinson.” Cow-hell stands up and scrutinises the teens with dark eyes.

“I have work Friday night, Sir.” Louis says.

“I. Don’t. Care.” _This is all wholly unfair!_ Louis wants to stump his foot like his baby sisters do. He wants to kill the man in front of him. “OUT!” Cow-hell squeaks. Louis stomps out, not caring if Ashton is close by or not.

Harry is washing his eyes in the mirror, trying to wash away the tears that a reddening his eyes. He might be a little tougher these days, but overtime the word _fag_ falls his insides twist. And yes, cock-sucking lips were a compliment in some peoples books, but it hurts. He presses a scratchy paper towel against his eyes, when the door bangs open. He sees a flurr of Louis running into the nearest stall. The door almost falls out of its frame under the weight off his anger. Louis screams at terrifying strength and kicks at the stall as if he could break through. The wall splinters dangerously when Harry enters “Lou? What’s the matter.“ 

Louis tries to wiggle away, his eyes red and a scroll on his thin lips. ”Nothing. Get out.“ Louis grabs Harry’s shoulder and tries to push him out, but Harry’s too burly in Louis’ vision to be moved so easily. Instead, Harry holds open the door, that Louis was trying to push closed on him, with all his might. 

”What happened.“ Harry asks, scolding himself for being too soft. 

Tears of anger and frustration are building in Louis’ eyes. ”Cow-hell gave me detention again. I’ll lose me job at this rate.“

Harry steps forward and collects the squirming smaller boy in his arms. Louis thrashes a bit and tries to slap against Harry’s chest but ends up sagging against him. His tears being carried away by Curly’s sternum. ”I'm sorry Lou. Do you want me to talk to him.“

”NO! Any more advocatin’ for me, and he’ll double the hell.“ Louis gently pries Harry to an arm's length of distance. “Can’t wait for him to meet Fizzy, she’ll teach him right.”

”I can talk to him, I have some connection with him at the moment.“ Harry tries again. 

”Wha’ connection?” Louis asks, wiping at his eyes, green eyes following the movement. “Ye sleepin’ with him?“

Harry’s head snaps back taking aback ”What? No!“

” ‘Cause he was awfully close to ye on Tuesday.“ Louis accuses him. He remembers the hate he had felt when he saw Cow-hell so close to _his_ Harry. It felt like Harry was an extension of Louis, and by fucking with Harry, Cow-hell was hurting Louis too.

”What you on about?“ Harry asks, his eyes are going hard. 

”What ye goinneur tell me, ye didn’t realise ‘is hand on yer ass.“ Louis hadn’t actually seen it happen, but his hand had been so dangerously close to that perfect body. That sacred cute bum of his.

”He did not have his hand on my ass.“ Harry shakes his head amused. 

”Didn’t do that.“ Louis wipes the snot with his arm. ”Don’t belittle me.“

”I… I wasn't.“ Harry is dumbfounded from the hurt shadowing Louis delicate features. ”He’s helping me.“ Harry tries to clarify.

”Yeah right.“ Louis wants to laugh but Harry’s lips turns downward when he meets Louis eyes. ”With what for Christ’s sake?“

”Photography. He has a friend who owns a gallery in Manchester, he said he could get me a spot to show my pictures. That would look so good on my uni applications.” Louis stares at him. Cow-hell was helping his Hazzah? What was his angle?

”Fuckin’ no Harry“ He finally manages to say in a slow drawl, snot and tears forgotten to stare at him with an agape mouth.

”What? I can use all the help I can get…“ Harry shifts under the blue eyes.

“What do ye ‘ave ’t do in return?” Louis asks. There is no way _in Hell_ , he’s doing that out of the goodness of his heart. 

”Don’t be mean. I can do this. I can be a photographer if I wanted.“ Harry bites back.

”I’m not saying ye can’t be just not with that fraud.“ Louis argues. _How can Harry not see this?_

”I don’t need you to doubt me.“ Harry says.

”I wasn’t…“ Louis tries to grab Harry’s hand but it’s his turn to pull away from him.

”I only wanted to help you.“ Harry starts sniffling, hurt spreading in his stomach “why do you always ruin everything?“ He pushes past the scrambling Louis and grabs his bag from the counter to exit the bathroom. Louis stares at his reflection. Hurt, exhausted and shock settled in his red rimmed eyes. His cheekbones have fallen in more and he looks older. Louis sighs and goes to the sink to wash his face. 

Ashton’s skin was dripping wet from the shower, after another hard practice the following day. His eyes were murders, when they landed on the rest of the team standing by the door. “Behind me.” Louis ordered Liam and the other boys that had chosen to stand at his side “this isn’t yer fight, boys.” Louis waited until Ashton was standing right in front of him. Liam’s legs were tense, and Joe was ready to bolt.

“Not boys,” Ashton says lowly, “children… we are your betters.” Ashton pointed to his three friends that were standing inside the showers naked as the day they were born.

“Why do ye insist on being a dick? Can’t ye just accept that I won ’n' ye lost. Yer reign is over, Ashton, we made tha’ clear last year!” Louis says infuriated, he was already wearing some shoes, that will help him with his balance.

“You are nothing.” Ashton said and stepped forward. Liam holds up his hand same as Calum, indicating to the rest of the team that this was a one on one fight. Louis dodged the first hit, and slithered his leg behind Ashton’s ankle, and pulled while pushing against his chest harshly. Ashton lost his balance and fell backwards. He hit the water, little puddles of the warm showers splashing around them. 

“If ye walk away naw, I won’t tell anyone you cowered like a worm into a corner.” Louis says. The boys held their breath, when Ashton stood up again. But Louis could see his move before he even made it. Louis swirled away from Ashton and trip him, he went flying for the walls, the water helping him slither over the wet floor. “Ye are soft, mate. This lesson is overdue.” Louis was breathing hard but had a small victorious smile planted on his lips.

In his clouded judgement of hate, Ashton attempted to stand up again but this time when he tried to deliver a blow to Louis while still sitting, he slipped again and hit his head with a low thud. He was slipping into submission. Louis toured over him and grabbed his hair, pulling his face up. “What are you fools doing, get him?” Ashton said towards his friends, his bar of soap floated against his leg.

“I am a Crusader, and I see nothing.” Steer said and turned his back to the scene.

“I am a Crusader, and I see nothing.” Liam said and turned his back to the scene.

“I am a Crusader, and I see nothing.” Niall said and turned his back to the scene.

“I am a Crusader, and I see nothing.” Joe said and turned his back to the scene.

“I am a Crusader, and I see nothing.” One player after another said the words and turned their backs towards the fight. To be King, you have to act like a king, there can’t be any doubt, and his people just chose sides. And right now Louis had it.

Ashton’s face went paler and paler by the minute, as he watched his team turn their back on him. The last boy stepped forward looked down at Ashton. “I’m sorry, but I am a Crusader, and I see nothing.” Calum turned his back to the scene.

“Looks like ye lost yer soap.” Louis said, and Ashton’s eyes went wide. Louis grins and bounces Ashtons cock on his foot. He kneels down and inches closer. “Ye go after anyone at school again, I will use Styles’ camera while I jam a baseball up yer ass, and then yer nickname anin’t goin’ to be Dotty, but Canseco does Ashy!” Louis could barely recognise his own voice. “Ye get it?” 

Jose Canseco was a baseball player who was a suspect in a rape trial in Las Vegas. Ashton seemed to know this because he swallowed hard around the ball in his throat. He nodded as best as he could with Louis hand still in his hair. “Yeah, yeah, I get it.” He winced.

“That goes for all of ye!” Louis screams loudly and lets Ashton go, he slums against the tiles and watches Louis pat Niall on the back, so he’ll let him out of the group. 

“I think he received your message.” Niall grinned, when they reached their bags, so they could leave. It was dead silent while everyone was trying to flee the changing room as fast as possible. 

“Let’s hope so.” Louis agreed. 

💚🍑💙

Louis and Ashton spend detention in silence. Ashton is still licking his wounds from the day before, and Louis spends the detention usefully by learning his lines for the play. 

When he finally emerged out of school grounds, the sky was already dark and Louis was chewing on his lip. Geoff had scolded him about changing his plan again, but Louis was able to switch a shift with Dooley. Louis had to sacrifice an afternoon during their term break in two weeks. Another fun fact, this year’s term break coincided with Halloween, and right after they’d all be going on their trip.

Louis walked up to his car, when he realised someone brown-haired was sitting on top of it. “What are ye still doin’ 'ere?” 

“Studying in the library.” Eleanor shrugs, and passes a can of nuts toward him. “You do still want to go to the Choir meet, yeah?” 

“Shit, almost forgot again.” Louis pulls out his phone to check the time, “when does it start?”

“Oh don’t worry, the drive isn’t that far. We can make it on time to see our boys sing.”

“Our boys?“ Louis chuckles and gets into the car. “Gimme the address.” 

“I’ll be your navigator, babe.” She leaned over the joy stick and gave him a surprise kiss on the cheek. 

Of course, they arrive horribly late in Nantwich. The school building above the entry has a large banner over its main door, reading ‘Congleton College Choir Meet.’ Eleanor doesn’t seem to be too worried about, as she simply grabs her bag and walks into the dark auditorium. One of the other colleges is currently singing a Take That song. Eleanor doesn’t mind the growls and rude remarks that follow them, when they squeeze past a few people to get to the only two open seats left.

Eleanor noisily goes through her bag until she finds a red nail polish which she shakes. “So they all sing one solo and one team song.” She explains while the parents next to them look at them horrified about the volume of their voices. El opens the little bottle unaffected, and the stench of nail polish reaches Louis nose. He’d protest, but the group stops singing and one of the girls steps forward to start a lament ‘Stay’ by Rihanna. Louis looks around, and realises that some people around them look offended and nostrils are flaring. Louis never liked the smell of nail polish. In Doncaster, Mark and him had insisted on a nail polish free zone inside the downstairs of their house.

“ _He_ has a beautiful voice you know.” Eleanor says, just as Louis was starting to enjoy the song.

He swallows a lump and watches El smear a clear line on her index finger. “I kna... have heard him in the shower a couple of times.”

Eleanor snorts, “Wow! Louis, you spied on him.” Louis rolls his eyes and wants to retort, but the people around them start shushing them.

“What’s your problem?” Eleanor attacks the father sitting two places to her right.

“This is a choir meet, be quiet.” The guy says.

“Oh please, they are teenagers get over it.” Eleanor bites back. Louis could help her out, but she seems to be doing fine on her own. 

“My daughter is going to Music Academy next year and will be the next Rihanna for your information.” The wife of the man replies, pointing toward the girl on stage. _She is good, but no Rihanna,_ Louis thought which is why he left El to destroy her.

“Oh please, if she has your attitude, she will have lots of problems in her life.” Eleanor retorts and goes back to face Louis. When her brown eyes meet his blues, Louis laughs loudly, which dies from the sound of people clapping. 

“That’s yer applause, love.” Louis says, and she chuckles bowing to him. The choir steps of the stage and grin at each other proudly. 

“Well done. Well done, Sign College of Halton.” The guy with a porn stash allows the crowd to give another polite clap. “Next up I ask Wellington College of Cheshire to come to the stage.” There is a bit of shuffling until Louis can see Liam lead the Choir to the stage. They are all wearing black pants and white shirts with a black cylinder on their heads. Louis spies Harry standing in the back, so that he doesn’t hide any of the other singers. 

They begin by clapping their hands and stomping their feet, the crowd starts clapping with them.“I gotta feeling that tonight’s going to be a good night…” It’s a simple song that Liam caries with a high voice, until there is a chopping sound from the piano and a nice riff from the guitar. They start singing, and Louis doesn’t recognise the song until Harry carries the bridge with his lovely deep voice 

“You could be preoccupied, 

Different date, every night 

When girls say I want, I want, I want, but that's crazy”

The other join him, and Eleanor gives him a nudge and rolls her eyes at the lyrics. Louis mouths ‘fuck you’ at her. She giggles into her nail polished hand. Louis misses the moment that the group split up and let Harry walk toward the front. He lifts his green coloured microphone and closes his eyes to start singing. 

“I've got a girl crush

Hate to admit it but

I got it real bad

Want everything she has

I want to taste her lips

Yeah, 'cause they taste like you

I want to drown myself

In a bottle of her perfume

I want her long brown hair

I want her magic touch

Yeah, 'cause maybe then

You'd want me just as much.”

Louis can feel the tears pouring down his face. He’s gone cold, even though his heart is pounding _what have I done to you?_ Louis wonders and looks at Eleanor’s brown long hair and back at Harry’s chestnut curls that he is growing out. _Why are ye growin’ ‘em out?_ Louis felt like an idiot. He needs a drink, if he can suffer through this meet. Knowing that he hurt that boy so bad drives fear into his heart. _But I want him too!_

“I don't get no peace

Thinkin' about her

Under your bed sheets

The way that she's whisperin'

The way that she's pullin' you in

Lord knows I've tried

I can't get her off my mind.”

Louis can’t hear what song the team starts singing in unison, overlapping Harry’s solo. He’s also wiping at his eyes, and quickly joins the little dance routine that the choir group is doing. Louis leans forward and cries silently into his hands. He can feel a strong hand rubbing on his back.

After the applause, Eleanor quickly guides Louis out of the school. He shakily breathes in the night air. El helps him unpack a cigarette and light it, because his own hands tremble to hard. “Are you going to be fine?” She sounds worried.

“Gimme a mo.” Louis answers. “Didn’t expect tha’.” 

“Me neither.” Eleanor says. “It was beautiful, though.” They stay silent until Louis has finished his cigarette.

“Do ye mind driving?” Louis asks. “I don’t want to kill us.” Eleanor nods and gives him a sympathetic smile.

They walk towards the parking lot, when they hear some familiar voices. “Oh my, you are horrendous, Niall!” Barbara is standing by her car, while Niall has his upper body inside the car.

“Just so hungry, babe. Who would’ve known it would take farever.” Niall complained.

“Bloody hell, are you never full?” Barbara scolds. “Hey Tommo. El!” Barbara gives Eleanor a side hug and a small kiss to the cheek. 

Niall suddenly reappears. “Hi, you here?”

“Oi, supportin’ the Payne.” Louis jokes, but by the look of it, Niall can see the dried tears. “Got to go, though.”

“Tell them how proud we are yeah?” Eleanor smiles brightly, trying to divert the attention away from Louis. She grabs him by the elbow and drags him to his car. If Niall wasn’t suspicious before, he clearly is now. No one but Louis is allowed to drive Bertie.

To Niall Barbara says “I think he knows Harry was singing about him and Eleanor,” while she chews on her hair. Niall nods, while he watches Bertie drive off the lot, and Louis’ head drop against the glass.

The next week flies by. Sooner than later, Louis is standing on the footie pitch with an armband around his upper arm, declaring him the captain. Louis steps up to the referee and the Bradford Cannon’s team captain. “Good day gentlemen.” The two captains nod to each other. “Heads or tails?” 

“Tails.” Louis says, voice low. The coin flips and Louis wins. “We take that side.” Louis says and points towards the side where they won’t have the sun burning into their eyes. The referee nods and both captains walk back to their teams. He hears some familiar screams and waves at his sisters and mother. They are lifting a large sign which reads, ‘Go Captain Louis!” _I love them so much._ He can feel his heart swell, and he gives one last pep talk to his team. While everyone else is huddling in, Ashton’s spine stays straight. His eyes are hard on Louis, when he reminds the team to have fun and kick some ass. As particular to their ritual, one after another they spit into the circle and yell “Crusaders.” There is applause when everyone gets into position. The other team has kick-off, Louis often finds when things aren’t going to well in the first half, having kick off gives the team confidence. It’s another reason to choose sides rather than kick off. 

Thirty minutes later, Louis is drenched. He’s forgotten how exhausting full games can be. He claps into his hand and tries to call some positive “keep up the good work guys!” He can see the twins still holding up their sign, and he winks at them, though, they probably can’t see it. Both teams are equal. There have been no goals yet. Louis leans forward, hands on his knees when he catches sight of Zayn talking with Harry, who is watching another unknown boy with heart eyes. Maybe Louis should hit that boy with the ball like he did with Taylor last year. He snickers from the memory. 

The last 15 minutes go horribly. Louis can’t forget the heart eyes and looks over every chance he gets. Louis not sure if Harry is even watching the game, every time he looks over the boy is pushing his head together with the other boy. He can feel the rage building. _Ye want to be in El’s place? Watch me games!!!_ Louis loses the ball on Cannon’s midfield and kicks at the grass frustrated. He doesn’t have it in him to follow the team player who has the ball at the moment and watches from the half way line when number 17 scores on them. A few minutes later they are rescued by the half time whistle blow. 

“What’s wrong?” Liam asks out of breath when he runs over to Louis. But Louis already knows he played shit the last quarter of an hour. 

With a fast pace he power-walks to the stands, and steps on a small chair to be eye level with Harry, Zayn and mystery boy. “Who the fuck are ye?” Louis asks him. He has fascinatingly golden eyes.

“Supporter of the Cannons.” He whimpers. “My brother is captain.” Louis’ eyes go into slits when he stares at him.

Liam tugs Louis down from the chair “Winston is going to lose it, mate. Go to the huddle.” Louis wanted to protest but started stomping over to the huddle forming at their goal.

Liam watches him go and hoists himself onto the chair. “Could you stop flirting for the next half? It’s his first game as captain and it would be quite nice to win this one.” Harry blinks at him and pouts. “Come on Styles.” Liam just shakes his head and joins his team. 

Second half goes better, because Louis can feel Harry’s eyes on him more often, which for no apparent reason soothes him. Around the 71st minute of the game, Niall scores with a header from a corner kick. The game ends with a 1 - 1 score. Not their best but for the first game quite acceptable. He shakes the hand of the cannons captain with a smile “there’s a party at a friends if ye want to join.” Louis tells him.

“Cheers bro. I’ll ask my brother, but I think a couple of us would stay.” 

“It’s big innit?” Louis can hear Harry’s deep voice travel, while Louis is mixing some drinks. 

“Too big for ye Harold?” Louis teases, when Harry comes into view inside the kitchen door frame. His curls are stuck in an all too familiar green beanie, a black band t-shirt from poison, biker boots and normal jeans. Louis briefly wonders if Harry hit his head during the game. But he looks better than expected. 

“I’m used to big.” Harry chuckles winking suggestively at Louis. He can feel jealousy storm in his gut, realising that Harry didn’t mean him as big. He was referring to others that he had. Louis frowns. Zayn hugs Harry from behind, looking cross-eyed at Louis. 

“Where’s Nick?” Louis asks Harry, who shrugs and gives Zayn a kiss on the cheek. Zayn doesn’t move away and Louis wishes that they would disconnect. He gulps down his drink in one go and starts making the next. Five large cups of Jaegermeister-mix later, Louis supplies his friends with his amazing drinks. 

Liam runs his arm around Louis neck and grins, “We did good, aye?”

“Yes Payno. Passible job.” 

“That’s so offensive.” Liam complains but steals one of the drinks anyway. Louis and Harry’s eyes meet over their glasses. Louis can feel his fingers itch to grab for Harry and bury himself into his neck. 

“Let’s dance.” Harry interrupts them and grabs Zayn’s hand still resting on his waist and leads him into the living room. Louis enters the living room too, but stays leaning against the wall, where he can watch Zayn and Harry swing their upper bodies to the beat of Nickelback. Niall joins them with a bag of chips in his hand and a mouth full of Lay’s. 

“I like your jacket.” Barbara’s back collides with the wall next to him when she takes a big gulp from her beer bottle.

“Then ye’ll probably like me pants too, they're made out of the same stuff.” Louis snorts, looking down at his jeans. Barbara giggles and Louis asks “Ye drink beer?”

“Always.” Barbara smiles, “why do you think Niall fell in love with me.”

“I don’t know… thought maybe yer particularly good at cooking.” 

Barbara laughs loudly. “Yeah, that would make sense.” She turns to face Louis, who is watching Harry and Zayn whispering to each other while grinding against each other. Louis drains his glass quickly . _T_ _his is agony_. “No Danielle today either huh?”

Louis looks at her and suddenly starts searching faces, Liam is talking to the Cannon’s Captain and his younger brother from the bystanders earlier. But he doesn’t see his girlfriend around. “I guess not.” Barbara nods with a sad frown. Briefly he wonders what she knows about this, how much the girls really talk to each other. 

“Speaking of girlfriends, where’s Calder?” 

Louis freezes, that’s an excellent point. To be honest he can’t remember if she was even at the game. Louis shrugs and when Barbara chuckles over his nonchalance, he grabs her hand, and they join the dance floor. They slow dance for a while, Barbara flush to his front. “This okay?”

“Trust me, unless your eating something out of my bellybutton, Niall won’t care.” Barbara grins, but there is fondness in her voice.

“Sounds like ye and Nialler are goin’ strong.” She hums, and they keep small talking while he sways her back and forth. Niall takes over at some point, and Louis takes a seat next to Liam. They get another drink together. For a moment they stay quiet, meanwhile Louis eyes room back to Harry’s tiny waists. He’s holding his hand outstretched above his head and is cocking his hips from side to side. 

“You can’t help yourself, can you?” Liam asks after following his gaze.

Louis, not so discreetly, adjusts himself. Harry looks like a mash between stripper and baby deer caught in the headlights. “You look and ye don’t kna what ye like more. ‘is ass, ‘is eyes, ‘is lips?” Louis moans.

Liam laughs, and claims “I don’t have that problem.”

Louis looks at him and grins “ ‘course ye don’t mate. Ye don’t even get a reaction when yer with Danielle.” He’s teasing of course. The talk about Liam’s sex life, but recently he obviously has nothing to talk too much about. He usually gracefully listens to Louis escapades and only minimally pulls a face.

“I do too.” Liam pouts, _he takes everything too serious, of course I’m going to tease him further._

“Oh really? Where do ye feel it? In yer ears?” Louis grabs his junk “here?” He lounges forward and bites Liam’s ear.

“Get off mate.” Liam chuckles, but there’s a blush evident on his smooth features.

“ ‘ey when are ye going to see Danielle again?” Louis asks, trying to sound off handed. 

“Going down next Saturday for a few days, makings use of the term break.” Liam smiles. 

“Will be good, yeah? See yer girl again?” Louis punches him to get his attention again.

Liam nods, and gives him a small smile. “At least I’ll be gone for teacher-parent conferences. My mum is going to gush over all the teachers again, and this way I can put her on mute.”

“Forgot about that.” Louis groans and takes a shot. 

“Your mother is going to love meeting Cowell.” Liam states.

“I’m going to have to warn her, maybe she can give her a little peace of mind.” Louis groans and slums into the couch further. Harry is swaying again moving his hands from side to side. “You’ll be back for Halloween right?”

“You actually think I would miss Leigh-Anne’s famous Halloween party?” Liam snickers, to show that Louis doesn’t know him at all.

“Considering I went as a ghost last year, I can’t say that I know that.” Louis scolds him.

“That’s right, you weren’t here last Halloween.” Liam says. “You have to come in costume. You know that right? It’s an abomination if you don’t!” 

“I’ll think of somethin’.” Louis takes another sip, when he sees Harry catching his eye and quickly plasters himself back to Zayn’s back. Louis looks away, because he could see Harry’s self-assured smile. He talks to Liam and Barbara again, but can’t help it. His eyes quickly find Harry again. He can see him whisper something to Zayn. But there is something different about these whispers. And soon Louis realises what it is. Harry's lips encase his ear, and suddenly Zayn’s earlobe pops out of his mouth. Louis' stomach falls into his boots. It feels like the moment when he accidentally crashed his mothers car in Doncaster to impress Hannah. The disappointment, the fear and the shock. _Zayn and Harry, when did that happen?_ Tears prickle from the disappointment, the betrayal. _Fuck!_ Liam discreetly follows his gaze, but the moment has already left, so he can’t understand Louis’ sudden pale skin, nor his frantic eyes. 

Louis stands up and rushes to the bathroom, where he empties his bowels. When he comes back to the living room, Harry is standing next to Liam, where they had been sitting. The Cannon’s captain is introducing himself to Harry, while his younger brother has an arm around his shoulder.

Louis sees red again, so he approaches him, puts a death grip on the captain’s brother’s neck and tickles his side. The boy lets Harry go immediately. “He’s trying to chat ye up by the way.“ Louis laughs at the kid, nodding his head at Harry. The boy turns red and shifts uncomfortably. Harry frowns at Louis. He lets him go again, while the boy grabs his brothers arm, and they excuse themselves rather quickly. 

“The fuck, Lou?”

“Don’t want ye cheatin’ on Nicky.” Louis sneers. Harry walks up to him and Louis has to walk backwards, because Harry hasn’t been this intimidating in… ever.

“I don’t cheat. I don’t lie. I’m Not with Nick!” Harry says, and Louis’ back hits the wall. Some people are giving them curious eyes, and Louis can feel the flush in his cheeks.

“Harry.” He whispers, _okay fine it’s a whine._ His hand land on Harry’s abs. They shift under his fingertips. “God.” He whispers this time, his hands clench in Harry’s black shirt. His senses are swimming from Harry’s cologne. It’s overwhelming him. The world going hazy except for Harry.

Harry cocks an eyebrow, “you need some of my poison?” 

Louis takes a moment to understand the pun, until he looks down on the poison band t-shirt. Louis smiles, while his voice comes out thin “I’d love that.” Harry chuckles. With his index finger he traces Harry’s abs. “Please.” Louis is angry at himself for being this weak, for whining like a needy baby.

“Oh I have to go…oh…” he playfully looks at his watch, but just grins. Louis giggles, yes he giggles, he can assure you it’s quite embarrassing. “I’m just kidding… just kidding.” He gives Louis a crooked smile, while keeping his lips closed which makes him look like a frog. The world stops moving for a moment. There’s just green. 

“I’ll go wherever ye want me ta.” Louis says. Harry starts smiling lopsided while biting his tongue, he looks like a frat boy and Louis wishes he could lean up and latch their lips together. 

“I said I don’t cheat.” Harry says. “Neither am I a mistress.” He turns away, and Louis’ hand loses its grip on Harry’s t-shirt. _I want him back!_ His hands a clammy and his legs are about to give out. He looks up to see a couple of people giving him curious looks.

“Shit, shit, shit, Liam.” Louis goes in a frenzy, taking Liam to the side, so they can talk in a relatively private corner.

“He completely had you there.” Liam says

“I know, how could that happen?” Louis whines. 

“Did you just forget that you were here.” Liam asks, looking a little shocked. “He was leaning all over you. I mean I couldn’t see what he was doing, but it was obvious you weren’t pushing him away.” 

“We got to go.” Louis says.

“We can’t, that’ll look even more suspicious.” Liam argues. “You idiot.”

“I’m hard as a rock Liam.” Louis complains pointing to his groin. 

“Don’t need to know that.” Liam says, looking around as if to see where the best exit strategy would leave them too. “God, I really need to ask what he said to you.”

“Argh, Payno.” Louis argues. “It’s not what he said… more like what he smelled like, how froggy he looks when smiles and those damn rabbit teeth.”

“Okay I get the picture.” Liam shakes his head, clearly amused. “You are such a puppy sometimes.” 

“I’m not a puppy.” Louis pouts. 

“Then a bean.” 

“What?”

“You know a bean: small, cute, curvy.”

“Fuck you.” Louis says and stomps away, toward the front door. Liam is following him chuckling hard. Out front, Louis takes his responsibilities quite serious and says goodbye to the drunk Canon’s that are still on the lawn.“Thank fuck, Bradford ain't too far away, yeah?” One of the Cannons nods before throwing up all over Louis shoes. “Can we leave now?” He asks Liam, who looks green enough to follow suit.

Eleanor suddenly appears next to him “Do you want me to suck you off? It’s been a while since…” 

She doesn’t end her sentence. “Don’t worry about it.” Louis says. He walks back to Liam’s car with him. He’s the designated driver or so Louis thinks.

💚🍑💙

Jay is in a hurry, her and Dan had split up for the teacher-student conferences. Dan was meeting Lottie’s teachers, Jay was meeting Louis’ teachers and Mark had come out to talk to Fizzy’s teachers. The kids had been so excited that their dad was coming out, and Louis had promised not to set the house on fire while the parents were of to school. Jay seriously hoped that the term break would go over easy. _Five days left_ , she told herself. 

She rounded the corner and breathed a sigh of relief when she saw the little group of people standing in the hallway. She thanked the scheduling team, at least they gave parents a few minutes of a break in between teachers. She recognised one of the women. She still had the most luscious long black hair, which used to make her jealous during their time at college. She barely aged since then, and she still had the one feature that made men fall at her feet: Dimples. “Hey Anne.”

“Jay!” They kiss on the cheek, and the familiar touch makes Jay feel better. 

“How’s Gemma doing with university and the new place?” Jay makes conversation.

“She’s doing so well, I think she’s just enjoying the ‘annoying brother free zone’.” Anne says proudly.

“Oh I bet. Speaking of how is Harry?”Jay asks, sympathetically. Last time she’d seen Harry he had been looking handsome at her wedding. The time before that she heard rumours about the severe bullying he is under.

“He’s doing alright.” She lowers her voice, whispering as if it were a secret “besides the heartbreak.” Louder she says “There’s No bullying, or relatively none, he’s more confident and his father made a show of learning how to hit back. And your boy helped in that!”

“I think Louis misses having him around.” Jay tells her. Anne turns to her and stares at her with meaningful eyes, as if Jay had let something slip, Anne wasn’t suppose to know. _But what is that?_

“Excuse me but did you say Louis?” A pretty woman, a little older than Jay herself, with a long face, dark skin and salient eyes, approaches her.

“Yes. My son is Louis Tomlinson. I’m Jay Deakin.” Jay holds out her hand, Anne is still watching her with an inquisitive expression. 

“I’m Norma Thrillwall.” After Norma realises there is no recognition on Jay’s face she adds “Jade’s mum.” Jay is doing everything to rack her mind for the name Jade, but all she remembers is a Jesy. “They went to Ibiza together.” 

“Oh wow, good to meet you.” Jay fakes realisation. “They had a lot of fun together.”

“Yes, though it ended a bit tragic.” Anne’s not even fawning listening in, her head is bouncing from one mother to the other, taking mental notes. 

“Yeah, well…” Jay makes a whirlwind expression with her hands.

“And I’m sure Louis wasn’t all that happy, him having separated from Eleanor and everything.”

“He what?” Jay and Anne’s head spin at the same time.

Norma’s hand reaches out and touches Jay’s arm, “sorry probably wasn’t meant to say that am I right? A secret and all that.”

“Yeah…” Jay trails off and avoids Anne’s eyes.

“They’re back together anyway, right?” Norma smiles. Jay doesn’t know what to say.

“That teacher is horrific, just warning you.” Dan says when he suddenly joins them. Jay is internally grateful for him. 

“Which one?” Anne inquires.

“Cowell?” Dan says.

“Oh yeah, duck and cover.” Anne giggles.

“I’m Dan.” Dan holds out his hand to Norma. 

“Norma Thrillwall.”

“Oh Jade’s mum, have heard a bit about your girl. She’s such a good friend to Louis, such a good support for him.” Jay narrows her eyes on her husband.

“I think we have to get going again.” Anne says looking at her watch.

“Where do you have to go next, love?” Dan asks.

“Mr. Cowell.” Jay says staring at her list.

“Oh boy, he hated Lottie. Good luck, he’s a shit, be as rude as you need to be, yeah?” She smiles and gives him a quick peck.

“Good evening.” Jay beams at the older man in front of her.

“Hi.”

“Jay Deakin.” She holds out her hand. Mr Cowell takes it and asks her to take a seat.

“I’m sure you know this your boy is quite difficult.” Jay’s breath hitches. “He’s loud, doesn’t listen and constantly chats. He doesn’t show any signs of interest nor does he respect me as his teacher. He even invites other students to be loud and obnoxious as he is.” 

“I beg your pardon.” Jay says, holding up her hand, to silence the man. Louis is her baby. How dare he? At least let her down easy, _nope Louis was right he’s just a cunt._ “My son doesn’t find your class very engaging, neither does he believe that you are being as impartial as you should be as a teacher. Neither do I for the matter.” _Suck on that._

“I don’t think that your son’s opinion is impartial.”

“Are his grades good?”

“Depends on what you define as good, Mrs. Tomlinson.”

“It’s Deakin. And I know he is passing. He’s doing quite well in your class. I know he’s a little… inattentive at times. But I want to ask you to stay impartial and fair toward him even if you hate his guts. Which, by the life of me I don’t understand.” She stands up and collects her purse. “Good night, Mr. Cowell.” She walks to the door and turns around again, “ye know they call you Cow-hell, right?” The teacher can’t respond because Jay storms off.

Jay bursts through the door, her hands are on her hips, and she is staring down at him. Louis scrambles to remember what he has done wrong. He went to work, bought back food for his sisters, because their parents were at college. The twins were tucked into bed, while Lottie was doing her nails next to him and Fizzy was writing into a journal, all watching friends on the big TV in the living room. “With me now!” 

“Sure.” Louis stands up and Fizzy shrugs her shoulder. He follows his mother to Dan’s office, Mark and Dan both give him reassuring looks. _What did I do?_

“You broke up with Eleanor?” She squeals.

“What? No.” Louis very confused.

“Before Spain? You are ‘back together obviously’, as the lovely Norma has said.” Jay puts her hands back on her hips. “Norma is Jade’s mum by the way. A girl I have never heard of before but Dan did.”

“Eh mum…”

“Oh and she went to Spain with you. Why don’t I know these things?”

“Mum…”

“Oh I forgot, apparently you have a job I don’t know about.” 

“I wanted to tell ye…”

“You also forgot to mention that that discount for the school trip doesn’t exist! Where in the hell am I going to find over two hundred pounds in the next week until your trip?” She’s shaking her head. “And don’t even get me started on Anne.”

“Anne? What’s wrong with Anne?” Louis’ getting very confused.

“Oh I don’t know… she just kept giving me these looks. Those looks that didn’t know if I knew something and playing dumb or if my son doesn’t talk to me as I always claimed he did!” She was yelling now. _That must have been the worst._

“Can I explain now?” Louis asks, after there was a short moment of silence.

“Oh if you don’t mind.”

“Jade’s Perrie’s best friend, who was Zayn’s girlfriend at the time. Me and her are real good friends and have a few classes together. I’m glad ye met her mum, she must be sweet. Let me think… oh yeah… I got a job at the Fish&Chips store in town. I wanted to pay for the trip meself. Ye already have to pay for Lottie to go, and I wanted to pay meself, give ye a little bit of a breather. You and Mark were always strapped for cash in Donny. What else… I went on a break with El during summer, so we could both explore. And yes were official again.” Louis doesn’t mention the fakes of it all. “Did I miss somethin’?.” 

Jay is squinting at him, “Anne.”

“Right. That might have something to do with Harry. But… it’s nothing.” Louis says. Jay’s not convinced. 

“Well, it’s real grand of ye to pay for the trip yerself, but ye’re a kid. You’re not meant to have that much on yer plate just yet.” Jay says, and finally reaches out to take her baby into her arms. 

“I can keep the money.” 

“Oh hush.” She giggles. Louis breathes in her soothing sent and for the first time in a long time feels relieved to having told her so much. Even if he still couldn’t tell her about Harry, just in time she said “I don’t believe ye about Anne.” 

“Let me have at least one secret woman!” She chuckles some more.

“Thanks mummy.” They are both interrupted by his phone ringing. 

“Oi Payno!! Did ye already go through all sex positions or why are ye calling me?” His mother is smacking him on the arm, as she passes him on her way out. 

There’s sniffling and someone blowing his nose, when Liam finally speaks up. “I’m on my way home.” 

“But why? Aren’t you staying for like five days or something?” Louis sits down on the armchair and fiddles with some of Dan’s papers.

“She broke up with me.”

“Bloody hell.” Louis says exasperated. _Kind a saw it coming, still sucks._

“She wanted to do it in person, it’s why she didn’t come to the game or the party.”

“Was it the dance instructor, t’ Broadway idiot?” Louis asks, anger rising. How dare she? How dare she break his soft heart.

“She said it was the distance.” Liam starts crying again, and Louis doesn’t really know what to say to that.

“Want to come over?” 

“Train will be there in an hour.” 

“How about I pick ye up?”

“That’ll be great. Thanks, Louis.”

“Just be sure to kiss me mum’s feet.” Liam chuckles a snort, which is disgusting and relieving, but within the next minute he’s crying again.

Two days later, Louis drives Liam home again, where he has to explain to his mother that his girlfriend let him go, _yes he used those words, he better become a CEO._ Louis waited outside the house for a while until he got the go ahead that he could go to work.

Louis clocked in about an hour ago. It’s 7 now and theres the first rush of the night, all those that don’t want to cook tonight. Louis is stepping up some shifts during break, because of the time lost from detention.

He looks up to feel his heart slip into his pants. He sees him. He’s got his hand in the black leather jacket and his head to the ground, so that his curls are hiding his face like a curtain. His legs look as long and lanky as ever and Louis wants to nibble at them. _Stop that brain! I’m at work._

It takes Harry forever to reach the front of the line. “Hey.” He finally hears the dark rumble reach his ears. 

Louis blushes, _oh why? Why does me face betray me like that?_ “Hi” He says from beneath the fringe he looks at Harry with a soft smile on his lips.

“You look good…working.” Harry says slowly, brushing a few curls behind hie ear.

Louis snorts, “cheers, Harold.” 

“Can we talk?” Harry asks while he places his hands on the counter in a show of dominance.

“Sure, but ye’ll ‘ave to wait. Still working.” Louis points towards the line, and Harry’s eyes go wide when he realises that he’s holding up the line.

“That’s fine.” He says, as quick as he can with his slow talk.

“Want another cider during the wait?” Louis asks, remembering Harry’s order from last time.

“Sure...and a salad.” Harry says, squinting upwards to the menu which hangs above the counter.

“I think yer the only one tha’ orders that, Curly” Louis says while removing the lid from the cider bottle with a corkscrew.

“Mate how long do you need for chips?” A burly guy puffs at Louis, pushing Harry aside. But Harry is too kind to complain while he stumbles to the side a bit.

“Good chips take 7 minutes.” Louis calmly replies, while he gives the guy a look and then pointedly looks at Harry.“Have a seat Harold, I’ll be right with ye.” Harry takes his cider, and Louis gets a good view of his perky bum squeezed into those obscene jeans while he walks to the nearest chair.

It takes Timothy another 10 minutes to get the salad out of the fridge, at which point Louis scolds him for being an idiot. “Harold,” Harry turns around with a small smile on his lips. Louis waves the salad toward him. Harry quickly gets up, making the chair wobble dangerously. Harry has to sprint back to makes sure it doesn’t fall over, before walking to the counter to get his food. Louis is endeared, and he hates the clutching warm feeling in his heart.

“Hey, you, what’s in your oh-so-special sauce?” A girl asks, while Harry’s fingertips brush Louis knuckles. 

“I don’t know.” Louis says annoyed to the Barbie, s _he’s ruining a moment here._

“You don’t even know what you are selling here?” The thin woman asks, it’s obvious she has some annoying eating habits.

“Let me have a taste.” Louis leans over puts his pinky in the sauce and sucks it off. “Mhhh, ooh GGOOD” He starts moaning, “so tingling and oh god,” Louis starts exhilarating his moans. Tim catches on quickly, dips his finger in as well and starts moaning with Louis. The show ends with two fake orgasms. Louis shrugs “don’t know what’s special about that.”

Barbiesmirks, “well get me a dip.” Louis chuckles, and watches Harry go back to his seat with rosy cheeks. Harry has almost finished his salad, when the rush dies down a bit and Louis can quickly take his break. He sits down across from Harry. His lips a glazed from the vinegar and Louis remembers their second first kiss in Harry’s kitchen. He starts rubbing his hands together on top of the table. Harry dabs his lips with the napkin.

They are quite for a moment, and Louis wonders why Harry came at all. His eyes are still set on the counter top, when Harry reaches his hand out to Louis. But he pulls away. Harry notices and grabs his cider instead, trying to make it seem like he always intended to grab the beverage instead of Louis hand. Louis feels like shit when he watches Harry’s Adam’s apple move from the gulps he takes. _He probably just wanted to take me nerves,_ Louis stares at his hands again.

When Harry puts down the bottle, it’s empty. Briefly Louis thinks about Harry pretending to drink in order not to look so effected by Louis’ retraction. “Sorry.” Louis whispers.

“That’s okay... you can’t be seen holding the gay kid’s hand. I get it.” Harry says. Louis cannot tell if there’s a change to his voice, _is he mad, sad, hurt or harsh?_

“No it’s not…” Louis says, harsh to himself. Harry looks at him. Louis’ hands are clenching when he sees Harry’s green irritated eyes _._ Louis shakes his head and tries to clear the fog of words in his mind, he doesn’t necessarily realise that he says it out loud. “I wrote to you... and just... never mind.” Louis rips at his hair.

“What?” Harry chuckles lightly.

Louis’ eyes reaches Harry’s again, and they are sympathetic. _Why is he such a superhuman?_ “I had this bet with Ash. When I get captain, he has to leave ye alone and if ‘e gets captain, I have to let ‘im do what he wants.” 

Harry blinks at him, torn between thinking it’s a good or bad idea. “Who made captain?” Harry asks, momentarily forgetting that he watched a game a week ago where Louis was obviously captain. It was hard to ignore the Tomlinson sister’s screams.

“Me.” Louis says.

“Oh.” Harry looks down at his salad.

“Ash don’t like that.” Louis says. “Just be on the lookout yeah? Don’t want yer pretty face all banged up again.” Harry is still looking at his plate, but Louis can see his ears turning pink. “I don’t think he’ll try anything again.” Louis says with second thought to the shower scenario. “Is there something ye wanted to talk to me about?” 

Harry looks up, “I…it’s just…” He tucks a stray hair behind his ear again, Louis has the suspicion that it is the same one as before. “I don’t want you to try and get out of my way. I don’t want you to stop coming to party’s or stop dancing because you see me on the dance floor.” Harry shrugs and pulls at the end of his curls, _they do bounce when tugged, interesting_. “I want to be friends.” 

Louis gulps, “ehm… I’m not avoidin’ ye.” He picks at his thumbs, when Harry finally fits his eyes back on Louis heating cheeks. He’s not sure if the next words are going to be a mistake, _but fuck it._ “I’m jealous.” 

“Really?” For some reason Harry sounded proud.

“They get ta ‘ave a piece of ye, and I don’t.” Louis pouts. “It makes me mad that they get to touch ye.” Louis looks at him through his fringe, and Harry is smiling at him. Not froggy but cute, happy.

“So can we go back to being friends?” Harry asks hopeful, lifting the cider again just to realise that it’s empty. Maybe he wasn’t pretending after all. Instead, he starts pealing at the etiquette. 

“Yeah. I’d like that.” Harry gins and his curls shake from the nod. 

“I think you need to go back to work.” Harry points to the large line that was creating, and Louis feels a bit bad for not realising Tim’s frantic face.

Louis leans over the table and grabs Harry’s hand, just as he puts his jacket back on to head out. Harry looks shocked, looking at their hand, then at the long line of people and back at Louis. But Louis couldn’t give a shit who was watching. “I’m going to convince ye, ye know?”

“Of what?” Harry asks, his hand shaking slightly within Louis’ grasp.

“That you and me are endgame, baby.” Harry snickers, but tries to shake his head. “Just ye wait and see, Curly. I’ll win ye over.”

“That’s not really what friends do.” Harry says, voice small.

“Of course it is, friends find the perfect boyfriend for each other. I already ‘ave.” Harry laughs, and Louis wants to hear that honk every day! 

“That’s funny.” Harry says, when they are both standing again, Louis can smell the apples on his breath.

“What is?” Louis asks.

“Usually when people stand up they get taller.” Harry giggles.

“Haha, do you ever get stuck in the trees?” Louis sasses back, giving Harry a loving shove.

Halloween falls on a Thursday during their term break, making it perfect for a large party. Fizzy is applying her make up, when Louis stumbles in. “Ye reek.” She tells him.

“Seriously Fizzy? I need a costume.”

“Ye don’t ‘ave one yet?” Fizzy asks.

“No. Totally forgot about it, with work on me plate.”

“We still have that sailor costume you could put on.” Lottie says when she enters the room dressed as a hanged bride.

Louis contemplates, “I still fit in that?”

“Sorry to break this ta ye big bro, ye don’t grow that much!” Fizzy giggles.

Louis grumbles annoyed, “fine. Where is it.” He squishes himself into the blue pants and shirt, as well as adding his hat on top. He’s actually quite happy with the result, the pants are nice and snug on his thighs and it eccenterates the swell of his bum. They are a bit short, though, but this way he gets to show off his ankles (including his triangle tattoo). The top was always quite loose, so his biceps stretch the fabric lightly. He walks back into Lottie’s room.

“You actually look quite good.” Lottie says, the twins giggle when they stuff another few candies into their mouths. Dan and Jay took them trick or treating earlier, and they have been high on sugar ever since then. 

Louis turns around and wiggles his bum. “Yeah, I look grand.” 

Fizzy giggles and gives him a knowing one’s over. “Dressin’ up for someone?” 

Lottie watches him twist and turn in front of her mirror, “we could give ye white make-up, make you look dead. Like a dead sailor.” Louis beams. _Hell yes!_

Louis looked amazing! He truly did, the white makeup made his eyes pop, and his muscles were nicely on display. “He’ll want to eat you.” Liam says next to him, while they try to find their friends inside Leigh’s house. 

“I look so hot, I might even fry, Payno.” Louis grins up at him, he was going as a zombie, a large mend over his right cheek. 

Liam laughs, which makes Louis smile, finally. Payne is having some trouble getting over Danielle. But Louis has a plan, and he’s sure that Jade and Barbara can help him out. Speaking of which, Louis and Liam were slowly approaching Niall. “No way!” Niall screamed when he saw Louis’ outfit. Niall was dressed as a sailor, one that was still alive in comparison to Louis dead make up. And the fact that his costume actually fit him. “Twirl, twirl, twirl.” _Yep, Niall’s already waisted._

“Ye can crack an egg on me bum!” Louis giggles while he twirls for Niall. 

“That you can.” Harry’s deep voice says. Louis hadn’t heard him approach. When Louis finally faces him, his smile drops of his face. _Harry, he looks… well… he looks amazing… God… who made ye so beautiful. I’m already popping one._ The thing, you see, is that Harry was naked, almost completely naked. Well, at first Louis thought he was indeed naked, but in fact he wore a tiny flesh-coloured pants. They were so tight, Louis could see everything. EVERYTHING. If he squints his eyes, he could even see Harry twitch. _Hopefully, that’s because of me, well let’s stop kidding ourselves, it is because of me! Me bum is worth being hanged in a gallery._ Harry has hidden his nipples behind an x-crossed black tape, and his curls have disappeared in favour of two buns that make him look like a mouse. Louis loves this! He hopes there are some cameras around, so that he can see this regularly, _OR here is a better idea. I could totally ask him to wear it in bed. God, those pants are exhilarating_. 

“What are ye going as? Sex bomb?” Louis finds his words.

“Miley Cyrus,” Harry makes a face, slipping out his tongue and cocking his head. _Gorgeous, simply gorgeous._

“I’m pretty sure Miley Cyrus didn’t have a boner, Harold.” Louis snickers.

“Got nothing to hide.” Harry shrugs. Louis giggles and winks at him. Thankfully Barbara comes by and hands everyone a beer. 

“You look great Barbs.” Liam tells her, she had made herself into an old woman. She even had a cane and everything. 

“Thanks.” She giggled.

“Ye seen Harry yet?” Louis asks her. “Just add a fuse back here.” He makes a ‘flou-p’ sound as if he added a tail-like fuse to Harry’s bum. “And he’ll be a sex bomb.” Their friends laugh, but Harry’s face has heated up. He turns to look at Louis, who still had a hand near his bum, holding his hands as if her were holding a hose. Harry’s tongue stick out and forms around the mouth of the beer bottle when he takes a swig, and Louis is reminded of the dingy toilet when Harry was sucking his cock.

“Well, ifyou want to describe me as a sex bomb, I do have to inform you that you don’t have the gun licence for it.” Harry says, he winks when he realises he caught Louis of guard. Their friends start bickering about the college trip, meanwhile Louis and Harry are still staring at each other. Louis’ heart beats out of tune. 

“Oh Tommo, was looking all over for you.” Jesy falls around his neck, and gives him a very red rimmed kiss. 

“Hey baby.” He grins. 

“Just saw Eleanor, she looks class.” Louis and El didn’t talk about their costumes, in fact since their first fight they haven’t talked all too much.

“She does? Look at ye!” Louis grins, and holds her at arms length. She’s wearing an American Indian costume, with a feather sticking out of her hair and a very skin tight leather costume. 

“Told her that too.” Calum appears next to her. He’s wearing a smilier costume.

“Ye goin’ as a couple?” Louis grins. Harry shrinks away from them, closer to Liam. 

“Thought it were the best way to tell everyone.” 

“Tell us what?” Barbara interjects.

“We’re a couple!” Jesy mimics jazz hands. 

“Congrats.” Louis pulls Calum into his arms. “Proud of ye, mate. Come a long way, aye?” 

Calum nods. “Thank you, captain.” 

“Oh. My. God. That is so not okay.” An American voice travels towards them. Campbell is standing there, dressed as a cheerleader. _How bloody boring!_ “Like that’s like totally against like everything.” She points at Jesy’s costume.

“Take a breather, yank’.” Calum grins. “We’re not the assholes who did it.” Danielle pulls a face, until her eyes land on Harry. And her eyes go big.

“And you naked!” She walks towards him and pokes his abs. 

“Yeah, he looks well fit.” Louis smiles at Harry. Slowly Harry grabs her hands to pull them away from his body, which made his stomach twitch like something was tickling him.

Louis tries to swallow down the bile that had been rising in his throat. “Anyone up for a little strip poker?” A random bloke asks who just happened to pass by. 

“I’m sure Harold here would love to join.” Louis grins mischievously, everyone looks down at his tiny boxers, his only piece of clothing.

“Sure.” Harry says, “I love being naked.” He passes Louis, whose mouth has dropped.

“There you are!” Eleanor falls into his side. She’s wearing a red curly wig, white tights, a white puffy dress that reaches just above her thighs. Her makeup is what drives the fear of God into Louis heart. She’s a scary clown.

“You’re going as a clown?” Liam asks her, not trusting his eyes.

“I was going for lunatic.” Eleanor grins and loses her balance on her rollerblades. She regains her balance by using a death grip on Louis shoulder. 

“What’s wrong with you people?” Danielle raises her voice again. Louis is surprised that she didn’t follow Harry like a lost puppy. “American Indians, so offence. And now calling yourself a lunatic? That’s so rude. So insensitive. You people are culturally like… just racist. This is like wearing black face… it’s not okay.” 

“This is England honey.” Eleanor tells her. “Besides, you Americans aren’t exactly the best role models when it comes to racism.” 

“You preach it sister.” Jesy says. Her darker skin glimmering from the exposing light above her.

Louis feels bad for Danielle, her face has fallen from the scrutiny she was suddenly under. Despite her first appearance, Louis can’t deny that she was kind and open-minded, _for fuck’s sake_ she’s the first American he knows that cares about all these matters. To cheer her up, he leaves Eleanor where she is standing, and grabs for the brunette and tares her towards the dance floor. With an easy twist of the wrist he makes her twirl around her own axis. He grabs for her waist and pulls her against himself. In his peripheral vision he sees Liam help Eleanor to her feet. “I thought you don’t like me.” Danielle speaks up. 

Louis refocuses on her small pudgy face and smiles, “I like you. You just talk too much sometimes.” She tries to smile. Louis takes his hands away from her body, pushes his index fingers into the sides of her face and pulls them up. This, _finally_ , makes her smile. 

“Nice ass Tommo!” Jade grins, when she joins the two of them. Perrie is attached to her hip. They are going as Bonny and Clyde. “You look like a man stuck in a custom of a toddler.” 

“Thanks so much, ye look like a trans in a pant-suit.” He grins at her, and she flicks his nose. 

“Nice going there Campbell.” Danielle bows her head slightly, a little more life coming back to her face. 

“Thank you.” She smiles, but soon her face breaks into surprise when she feels Harry’s almost naked body pressing up against her. 

“Can I have that?” He asks, his usual slowed speak even slower due to his intoxication. Danielle is more than happy to hand over her number one foam finger. Harry puts it on his right hand and gives her a kiss on the cheek. He quickly disappears to take a few pictures. 

About an hour later, Louis’ friends are doing shots. They are all sitting at the dining room table, playing truth or dare. Louis would rather play spin the bottle and have a chance at kissing his Harry, but he was overruled. The bottle spins on Niall. Louis coughs into his hand and says “truth or dare?”

Niall’s eyes dart to Harry, the non-intoxicated part of brain tells him to surpass truth or Louis has the chance to corner him. “Dare.” He finally says. 

“I dare ye to eat as many hot dogs in a minute as ye can!” Louis giggles.

“I take that challenge!” Niall sounds too happy for this dare and Louis quietly scolds himself. Barbara is already off to get the plate of fifteen hot dogs. She positions it in front of Niall. Louis leans over the table, so that his bum his hanging of the edge. Phone in one hand he raises his other.

“3… 2… 1… Begin.” Niall grabs the vodka and coke to soak the hot dog buns. He shoves it into his mouth and gulped down the intoxicating mixture. He grabs the sausages and chews them down like a rabbit would with a carrot. His eyes are fixed on Louis phone screen, he gets more frantic, eating faster as the seconds are counted down. “DONE!” Louis screams before standing up on his chair. 

“I did it!” Niall’s cheeks are stuffed like chipmunks, and his arms in the air while he is staring down at the empty plate. “H’w ma’y wa’ ‘at?” Niall says with a full mouth trying to swallow around the large chunks. Louis’ not quite sure what he said, but Barbara does.

“15! Babe. Your personal best.” Niall makes an awkward victory dance.

“I’m the best. The best, the best and nothing less.” Niall suddenly crosses his eyes and stares down at the plate. His hand grabs his heart, as if he were having a heart attack. He makes a choking sound. 

“Alright there, babe?” Barbara rubs circles into his back. 

“He’s gonna blow!” Someone calls from the side. Louis lifts his eyes to meet Nick’s. _That where H went off to, while I was dancing?_ His rambling was stopped by a wrenching sound. His friends jump back, chairs fall to the ground and people scram to take cover. Brown bile floods the table and Louis is eternally glad that this is not his house. The clean-up would be horrible. Jade’s already hiding her nose within her elbow and Perrie is pressed to her neck. The stench is indescribable. 

“You fucker!” Niall looks up at Louis. 

“Wha?” Louis giggles. 

“Your fault, you little minx.” Niall wipes his hand over his mouth. Louis giggles even harder. 

Standing on the chair Louis starts screaming “You wanted it. You wanted it!” He bends forward laughing, while Niall’s eyes squint into a dangerous level of hate. Someone grabs him by his middle and lifts him off the chair. _Just like a toddler,_ Louis mind fills in. But these arms feel comfortable and Louis thinks he might like being manhandled. He gets put down with his back to the accuser.

“Run boy.” Harry whispers into his ear and gives him a clap on the right bum-cheek. Louis takes off, running away from Niall as fast as he can. He finds his way outside, but the stench is in his nose now, and he can feel Niall hot on his heals. He runs around the pool a couple of times. Louis doesn’t notice that the Irish has switched tactics. Niall had stopped midway, when Louis continued running, circling another round, when he collided with Niall’s body. Taken off guard Louis slips and falls into the pool. Louis sputters. 

He is a good swimmer, but he’s slightly intoxicated. He lets his body sink for a minute, before he realises that he has to swim to the top. Strong arms help him over the edge and a small fountain of water spills out of his mouth. Niall wipes away his wet fringe. “Didn’t want to kill you. You okay?”

“Yeah.” Louis says. “That’s rather kind of you.” 

“Yeah well,” Niall brushes his shoulder as if he were getting dust off of him. “Harry would kill me if I did.” Louis looks up at him, not sure what to think or say. 

“I like his hair.” Louis dumbly says, which makes Niall laugh with earnest.

“Bloody hell,” Leigh joins them. “There’s a bathroom upstairs where you can dry off.” 

“Cheers love.” Louis giggles and falls into Niall’s side, while they walk back inside. Leigh smiles while she joins her friends. 

Louis ends up in an upstairs bathroom with the bloke that Leigh is seeing. He is having way too much fun pointing a hairdryer against Louis, as if he were a cat. _That feels bloody good._ He sighs heavenly. The guy is laughing, when he watches Louis slowly twirl. “Beautiful princess.” The boy mocks him.

“Shut it, Einstein.” Louis grins. The guy touches his grey hair, “ye steal Calum’s dying can or some-wha’?”

The boy laughs again, “nah. Perrie’s mum is a hairdresser.”

“Sa that’s permanent?” Louis looks baffled, when he stops twirling and tries to stare at the guy if the hot air wouldn’t make him so blind.

“ ‘course not!” He sounds horrified. “Don’t want to look like a dweep. It’ll wash out with the next shower, at least that’s what they told me.” The guy shuts off the hair dryer, “you know your girlfriend is walking around as a clown right?”

“Yeah, why?” Confusion coils inside his mind.

“It’s just, Jade…you know that she’s…” He doesn’t get to finish the sentence as the door almost explodes. Someone is banging so harshly on it that Louis is afraid it could splinter. The both unlock the door together and greet Michael Clifford with a bird in his arm. 

“We need the loo.”

“Yeah, I can see that.” Leigh’s date says and walks past them with a slightly disgusted look on his face. When they’re back downstairs, they stick together and casually fall against the wall, watching the living room go havoc.

“I just wanted to ask you to look out for Leigh… she’s just such a sweet and soft person, don’t want anyone being difficult with her.” The boy next to Louis says, as they watch Jesy, Jade, Perrie and Leigh sitting on top of each other discussing something. It might have something to do with the blunt in Calum’s hand.

“Yeah right.” Louis nods, and his eyes scan for Zayn. He knows he’s around here somewhere, he had been standing with Ashton at some point, finding comfort in the fact no one wants to have trouble with Ash. Perfect hiding spot.

“It’s just the play, them student often get the brunt of it all and you are…” 

“The footie Captain crazy enough to be in a play even though that will make him look gay.” Louis’ eyes find the boy’s dark ones. He finds himself smiling. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll look out for her, though, I’m pretty sure she can do that herself.”

The boy just nods happily. Nick walks past them and enters Harry’s sphere. “You and him don’t get a long do you?” The guy asks.

“Just got off on the wrong foot.” Louis shrugs, looking around where he could find another beer, this conversation is going wrong.

“He’s actually really nice. Quite funny, exceptionally gay.” 

“How can ye be exceptional at something like that?” Louis grins. The boy shrugs but grins.

“Jordan!” The boy next to him -Jordan- faces Taylor. She gives both of them a bottle of beer.

“Cheers love.” Jordan smiles. 

“You hit me in the face with a football last year!” Taylor complains to Louis, which makes Jordan spit out his beer all across Taylor’s cheerleader uniform. 

“Sorry.” He says, just as she squeals an “ew.” Louis laughs full-heartedly, _such an idiot._ It’s quite enjoyable seeing her this drenched. Louis’ eyes go back to Nick, who is holding on to Harry’s hips again, but Harry doesn’t seem too interested tonight. He constantly twirls out of his grasp, there’s a crease between Nick’s eyebrows, clearly showcasing his frustration. But today Harry is more interested in the girl in front of him. Louis pales when he recognises the clown he’s dancing with.

“They did it at the base.” Taylor says.

“Who?” Louis turns his attention back on Taylor.

“Harry and Nick.” She says. 

“Sorry to say this, you know mess with all your gossip, but Harry doesn’t really seem like the kind of guy to do it in a dingy loo of a dark club.” Jordan interjects, and Louis, _out of platonic non-selfish reasons,_ couldn’t agree more.

“Well someone heard moaning and when they opened the stall there was Nick kneeling in front of Harry.” She pouted. She wasn’t very attractive when she was being childish.

“So he was just standing?” Jordan inquires. “Sounds much more like Harry. Oh, and also Nick, he likes the dingy places, I suppose.”

“Excuse me.” Louis says and runs back into the bathroom. _Fuck this fuckery of jealousy!_ _Fuck Nick too! Who does he think he is? Just slides down to the floor to suck that…no nope not thinking of his cock again._ Louis runs a frustrated hand through his hair. The mirror tells him that his makeup is losing colour and that he should properly wash it off. _Really, fuck Nick! … Oh, why does Harry just let anyone kiss his pinkish lips. Just not fair! Those lips are supposed to be on mine._ He notices that he is driving himself into a panic, heart starting to race.

Suddenly the scream from outside stops Louis’ panic. He rushes out to see what has happened. He runs into Barbara who tells him that “Jade…it was Eleanor. She ran for it… we have to find her in the woods.”

“What did Eleanor do?” Louis asks. He fallows her to the pool, where Jesy, Calum, Niall, Perrie and a few others were already heading to the adjacent woods.

“Jade’s afraid of clowns, and Eleanor showed up as one.” Perrie says next to him.

“For fuck’s sake!” Louis moans. He walks over to the El who had a frown on her face and looking at the small group who were about to head out to find Jade.

Louis can see Harry watching for a moment. _I want ye back on my thighs or me bum, push me up against a wall again._ Louis can feel his cock twitch, and by the looks of it Harry can see it too. He quirks an eyebrow and smirks. Harry joins Niall as they run into the woods, his bum skipping so delicately. Louis approaches Eleanor. “El!” He screams over the music. The dancing was staring to resume after Jade’s screams had died. “Ye need to wash yer face.” 

“No fuckin way!” Eleanor pouts. “Do you realise how long this took?”

Louis rolls his eyes “El, Jade’s dyin’ because she’s that scared of ye! Eitha wash yer face or leave.” 

“You are so full of it today!” Eleanor complains. “Not just doing what you tell me, mate.” Her hands land on her hips. “Why doesn’t she just leave?” 

“This is her best friend house!” Louis argues, J _esus talk about being thick. “_ El fuck off or wash off.” 

“No.” Eleanor shakes her head. 

“For fuck’s sake EL!” But Eleanor storms off to cry to her friends about him, so Louis rushes his hands through his hair again. 

Louis jogs out into the woods, as well. He tries to locate the voices and follow them, but his mind is still freaking out, he can’t think about anything but wanting to kiss Harry Styles. _Pink lips! Oh, so puffy._ He might be having a slight panic attack. He doesn’t hear the snap of a twig. Before he knows it Harry’s crowding him against a large tree, head hitting the wood, making a small cringe. “I want to tongue you senseless my curvy boy.” Harry moans into his ears. 

“Hazzah…” Louis can’t tell if this is a panic induced dream or reality. Large hands are running down his sides, kneading his hips. Louis mewls under the attention, feeling Harry’s warm and wet breath on his ear. “I’m all yours.” Louis manages to mumble, he’s rewarded with dainty fingers cupping his bum.

“Those pants of yours should be illegal.” Harry tells him. His fingers grip into Louis bum and hoists him onto his thighs. Louis moans, _how can I like being manhandled?_ “Your so aggr..vat..ing.” Harry moans while their cocks rub against each other. Louis hand searches for the curls, but they are still securely stuck in buns on top of his head. 

“I can’t…” Louis whispers into Harry’s ear. “I want my hand in your hair, Curly.” He’s patting Harry’s head and holding one of the buns in his hands.

“Shut up.” Harry warns him, and Louis whimpers, letting his hand fall back on Harry’s shoulder. There’s a wet tongue licking at his neck and Louis’s hand grab for Harry’s side to steady himself. Teeth scrape over his pulse point, the sharp pain of a bite running through his sides. He whimpers again, not allowed to talk, his head falls forward against the shoulder there. “I want her to see this. Want her to know you don’t belong to her. Harry’s hand suddenly cups Louis boner, “you only get hard for me, don’t you baby?” Louis whines. “I asked don’t you?”

“Yes, only for ye…can only get it up when I think of ye… please Harry.” Harry chuckles against his skin and continues biting him, while Louis leaves wet sweet kisses on Harry’s naked shoulder. He traces the shoulder with his tongue, up his neck and touches Harry’s earlobe with the tip of his tongue. “Haz.” Their cheeks rub against each other, and a low growl travels between the trees. _Oh, that was Harry?!_ Louis can feel Harry’s cock-head rubbing up against Louis length. Harry’s hand sneak under his sailor shirt, and tries to lift it, momentarily leaning back to tear it over his head. But Louis pushes the fabric back down.

“Come on, Lou. Show me your beautiful body.” Louis’ stomach swirls.

“No.” Louis whines. “Not me shirt, please.” 

“Why the hell not?” Harry asks, still tugging relentlessly. 

Louis can feel the heat flush his body, he looks away from the Adonis in front of him. “I… have a stom… my tummy…” Louis gulps, realising his insecurities for the first time, it clenches doubt into his stomach. “I have a tummy… I don’t want ye to see-“ Harry silences him with a kiss to the lips. 

“Your gorgeous.” Harry says, but Louis looks away again. This time Harry lets him, pull his shirt securely over his tummy again. “Who’s telling you this?” 

Louis just shakes his head, he doesn’t want to talk to Harry about his insecurities. Doesn’t want to tell him how Eleanor makes fun of his stomach or his thighs. Let’s not even talk about the ugly dimples at the bottom of his spine. Most of all, he does not want Harry to see the tear that is threatening to slither down his cheek, _damn alcohol._ He grabs Harry’s shoulder and hugs him tightly against his chest. “Just keep going, please.” His voice is embarrassingly quiet.

Harry’s hands leave his sides to cup his bum cheeks again and relieving their cocks by erasing the last of space between them. He mushes his lips onto his collarbone. This times the woods reflect a joint moan, when there is a whimper near them. Louis’ grip on Harry’s back “Harry…Hazzah…” Louis squeals a little when there’s another harsh bite on his neck. 

“Your not fleeing this time.” Harry warns, as if he can’t remember why they are in the woods in the first place.

“Harry, I think…” Harry scoffs, but doesn’t relent on his colourful masterpiece on Louis neck.

A third time that night, Louis’ feels like he’s having heart attack. “What? What are you doing here?” Jade says, tears streaming down her face. Harry lets Louis back down onto his own feet.

“You alright?”

“Is she… she gone?” Jade asks. Harry nods and takes her into his arms. Over Harry’s shoulder Jade gives Louis a curious look, who simply slumps his back against the tree and flips his fringe. _Fuck, Oh, Shit…what if she saw…Hazzah? What if she saw? What’s she thinkin’?_ Eventually the others find them, through Louis screams of ‘We found her! Over Here!’ They engulf Jade in their middle and walk back to the pool. Louis trods behind, his mind going into another spiral that is commonly known as a gay panic.

When Louis rejoins the party, about a mile behind the others, he hasn’t noticed just how sober he has become. How much his cock has deflated again and how drunk everyone else is. Louis feels a hand on his shoulder. “Aright there, mate?” Niall asks.

“Yeah,” Louis tries to force a smile. 

“Do me a favour take Harry home.” Niall points to Harry, who is sitting on a couch, slurping away on a pink drink. Seemingly happy with talking to himself. 

“Where is Jade?” Louis asks instead. 

“She and Perrie, they are getting some take out.” Niall chuckles. Louis shakes his head. 

“Shouldn’t we help them?” Louis questions.

“Don’t worry about it.” Niall says. He points to Harry who is looking around now, there is white paint all over the one side of his face. _God that’s me make up._ “Worry about him.”

Louis sighs, “help me get him into me car?” 

Moments later, Louis starts driving. Bertie’s seat belt alarm is blearing. “Could you please put on your seatbelt.” Louis says. Harry shifts to the edge of the seat, and stare at him over his exposed shoulder. His hand is resting on the console, blinking at him suggestively. The alarm stops. 

“How did you do that?”

“Magic.” Harry whispers, very breathily.

“Harry, I don’t want ta kill ye.” Louis fidgets with the steering wheel. To be honest he was a little scared Harry would say something sultry, that would further impair his vision on the road. Needless to say his cock was rigid again.

Harry slums against his seat, never leaving Louis face out of his sight for a single moment. He starts poking Louis’ cheek with his index finger. “Stop it, Haz.” 

He just chuckles “no.” And continues to poke him, while Louis keeps slapping his hand away. Finally, after a few minutes, Harry leaves Louis cheek alone. Louis takes a breath of air, _thank fuck he’s everywhere…how am I surviving this night? Maybe I’m dead, just didn’t notice it. I’m the dead guy in the pool._ Louis flinches when Harry’s warm fingers sneak under Louis sailor uniform. His fingertips dancing over Louis skin, shivers run up Louis side and walk along his arms. His thumb started stroking his flesh there. “I doubt yer boyfriend would like this, darling.”

“Not my boyfriend.” Harry’s hand sneaks over Louis’ tummy. Louis instinctively sucks it back in, to hide its plumpness from the person touching him. “He’s helping me figure some stuff out. He’s a friend.”

“Doubt he sees it tha’ way.” Louis says out of breath, holding his tummy in takes a lot of concentration. Harry scoffs next to him. His hands are travelling again, Louis can feel his pinky in the junction of his leg. “Babe don’t touch me there. I’ll kill us.”

Harry hums. “I’ve wanted to touch you since term started.”

Louis’ mind goes hazy again. “I won’t ever stop ye.” Louis says quickly. All his head can repeat is _Yes, please, Haz, be mine_.

Harry laughs, “you just did.” Louis quickly looks over to see Harry cocking an eyebrow drunkenly. His eyes are half lid, and he’s staring at Louis hip, where his hand is snugly holding onto Louis fat. Louis stops the car in the middle of the road, puts on the attention sign and bends down to the fluffy lips. Harry’s eyes finally find something new to look at. His chest is rising and falling faster and his grip on Louis is turning painful where the fingernails are digging into the abundance of his flesh.

“I won’t kill you Haz, what would the world do without one of its angels?” 

Harry snickers, his dimples deepening on his face, his nose scrunches up and Louis really wants to kiss him now. He leans forward and in the last moment swipes up to lick Harry’s nose. He’s giggling harder. _This is the Harry I know, a little shy but so cute. Not that hard exterior, that wall which I can’t climb_. Harry wipes his nose with Louis shirt. “You’re cheesy.” Louis puts the car in gear again after he has stared at Harry long enough. Harry quietly says “didn’t know that about you.”

“You’ll find out.” Louis says. “I meant what I said, I’ll woo the fuck out of ye.”

Harry wants to laugh, but burps accidentally instead. His hand cup his mouth in shock and Louis laughs. Arriving at Styles’ house, Louis grabs his phone and starts ringing Harry’s step-father Robin. Harry’s tight pants don’t allow a phone, much less a set of keys. He’s still wearing Taylor foam hand, when Robin and Louis carry him up the stairs into the room. “Thank you, Louis.” Robin whispers when he places a bucket and water next to the bed. 

“Yeah yer welcome.” Louis watches Harry’s marked up skin in the dim light. Louis’ scratches are all over his body.

“Good night.” Robin says, at the door he adds “if you leave make sure to pull the door closed, if not make sure he survives the night.” He _bloody_ winks and leaves the two alone.

Louis shakes his head and leans down to Harry. “I want ye to remember this Harold.” Harry’s eyes have problems focusing on Louis. “I had the chance ta stay tonight and I didn’t, because I’m a gentleman. I’m going to woo ye. All proper and all.” He gently prides the pins out of Harry’s hair and looses the hairbands so the curls fan all over Harry’s face. Louis fingers cradle through tangled lock. He bends down to brush his lips against the baby pink ones and puckers just a bit. He tastes like cranberries, the pink in his drink earlier becoming apparent. A smack announces the departure of their lips separating. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd love it if you'd leave me comments and klick the kudos button :) Thank you!
> 
> Some canon/explanatory notes…
> 
> 1\. All employees at Lightening Bell's Fish&Chips store can be seen in Louis' music video 'Don't Let It Break Your Heart'  
> 2\. Louis' audition song is a mash up from 'Miss You'


	7. Confessions, Digressions and Sexual Expressions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter!! I'm happy with how this turned out, hope you like it just as much ☺︎
> 
> Trigger Warning: Smut (finally 🎉), possible eating disorder, and language (as always)

“Darlin’, supper!” 

Louis stops counting for a moment “Comin’.” He starts counting again: 100, 140, 200, 260 quid. He cheers quietly. He counts the 240 quid off and puts it into a small envelope, where ‘college get-away’ is written on in his most neat handwriting, even if he has the worst. Louis puts the remaining 20 quid into another envelope, labelled ‘Nick.’

He runs into Fizzy on his way downstairs. “I don’t like it when people are cheerful.” She says. Louis snickers and makes himself comfortable around the dinner table. “Where’s the wine?” Fizzy asks her mother.

“Not feelin’ like it tonight.” She smiles and gives everyone a bit of mash. “Lottie. Louis. Have ye packed?” Both nod around their food. “Are ye excited then?” 

“I’m in a room with Eleanor.” Lottie says.

“How does that work?” Fizzy asks. 

“Oh their splitting up the rooms. Their like these tiny adjacent rooms, each with two bunk beds all sharing the same bathroom.” Lottie says. “They want the lower formers learning from the higher formers, so they make everyone pair up.” Lottie gathers some peas on her fork. Louis’ not that fond of peas. “For example, me and Millie, lower sixth form are paired together, and we share a room with Eleanor and Sophia, two higher sixth formers.” 

“I like that actually.” Jay smiles at her children. “So yer in a room with Eleanor?” 

Lottie nods, “yeah, and Sophia.”

“Who the hell is Sophia?” Fizzy asks, and gets scolded by their mother.

“The one snogging Liam at the Halloween party.” Lottie says.

“Yes!” Louis makes a fist pump in the air. The family stares at him. “I knew it! I just knew it. Me and Barbs set ‘em up! He was so sad about Danielle, just needs someone to snog his face off.” 

“EW!” The twins giggle. Louis grins. He didn’t actually see it happening because he had lost Liam at some point during the party, and that thickhead continued to say ‘a gentleman never tells.’ _Idiot!_ Anyway, now he has something to use to pester the idiot. 

“Give ‘im a break. He’s vulnerable right now.” Lottie cautions Louis.

“Always am.” Louis grins, earning a glare from his mother, who obviously knows the truth.

💚🍑💙

The bus to Wales leaves on Monday morning 8:30 am. Three big buses stand in front of the school gates of the Wellington School and College of Cheshire. Jay is fuzzing over her children, like they are tiny lambs, brushing Louis head with her fingers and ginning weirdly at Lottie. “Mum, please let us go.” Lottie moans. 

“Oh… I will miss me babbies.” Jay pouts. 

Louis twirls out of her grip when he catches Liam’s eyes. “There’s Liam, bye mum.” He gives her a quick kiss and heads over. “Heard ye snogged Sophia at Halloween.” Louis grins when he joins Liam. 

“Who’s Sophia, dear?” Karen turns to face Liam, who goes red.

“No one mum. Thanks for driving me, but you can leave now.” This is great, Louis has never seen Liam this embarrassed. His mother holds out a few freshly made sandwiches, which she shoves into his backpack. 

“That your mum, Louis?” Karen asks and turns to walk towards Jay and introduce herself. 

“You heard who were bunking with yet?” Liam asks. Liam and Louis had paired up, while Zayn had paired up with some other student, Louis had never heard about. Question was which pair of lower sixth formers they’d get roomed with. Louis shrugs and looks over to one of the chaperones. Ms. Cole was ticking off names from her clipboard. 

“She’s dressed to the T, in’t she?” Louis asks, while he watches Ms. Cole’s small feet in her dark pumps and her carefully styled hair. 

Liam goes heart-eyed, “she’s so beautiful.” 

Louis snickers, “Harry was so right, ye do ‘ave a crush on her.” Liam gives him a forceful shove.

“Speaking of.” Liam holds up a finger to a car parking some feet away. Harry jumps out, a big camel-coloured hat on top of his curls, tight pants and another one of his sinful shirts open to his midriff. Louis cursed the casual clothes rule, how will he ever be able to keep his hands off of him. Not after the woods, _can’t forget his strong thighs holding me up, nor his lips on mine._ He walked around with Hickeys for the entire weekend. His mother was delighted that he seemingly had worked things out with Eleanor. He’s stuck in his mind, so he almost misses the helpful hand on Harry’s duffel bag. 

“Why is he always around?” Louis whines frustrated, when Nick caries the duffel to one of the buses. Harry’s hand constantly grabbing the straps himself, while Nick keeps pushing him away.

“Someone said he’s flunking Uni.” Liam says.

“Shouldn’t he be in Liverpool?” Louis asks, running a hand through his fringe.

Liam shrugs, “should I bribe Ms. Cole to get us in a room with him?” Louis turns his eyes away from Harry engulfing Nick in a hug to face Liam’s brown hues. 

“Ye can do that?”

“Worth a try. I’m in Choir Club now.” Liam straightens his shirt, _such a grandpa!_ “I think she might like me.” 

“Yeah, keep tellin’ yerself tha’, mate.” Louis snickers.

Liam pouts, “do you want to bunk with Hemmings and Clifford?” Louis shivers. “Right. So I’ll go bribe.” He walks off, and Louis watches Ms. Cole’s nose go rosy when Liam starts talking to her, _interesting._

“Hey.” Louis turns to the dark voice. 

“Hi there, Styles.” Louis says and makes a show of checking out Harry. Harry squirms on the balms of his feet, when he feels Louis eyes on his thighs. “Last time I saw ye, ye were naked.” 

“I was wearing something.” Harry pouts. 

“How do ye know? I left ye in that bed, maybe I undressed ye first.” Louis grins, when he can literally see Harry think. 

“But you said, you wanted to be a gentleman.” Harry suddenly says. Louis raises his hand to his heating cheeks, hoping the naturally cold hands can help his cheeks to cool down. _So he did hear me._ He might have spent most of his weekend flipping out that Harry hadn’t heard him and the other half of the weekend thinking what if he heard? “Besides, I’m pretty sure…eh… you still dream of me… in that Halloween costume.” 

Louis just shrugs, Harry didn’t have to know he found the pictures of the party, and they were securely saved on a hidden app on his phone. He’d rather deflect again. “Ye know I did hope ye would’ve gone as a mermaid.” Harry looks too cute when he’s confused. “I was a dying sailor, ye could ‘ave saved me, innit?” 

Harry giggles at that, “thought you were the kind of guy who is scared of… mythical creatures.”

Louis shrugs again, “yeah well, could ‘ave gone as Tarzan, tha’ would ‘ave worked too. Ye know if ye really wanted to go naked, I kna ye like being naked.” 

“You would have gone as Jane for me?” Harry grins like he’s figured out to be clever. “All proper in a dress?” 

“Oh, I knew ye were thinkin’ of me in a dress.” He’s delighted when Harry’s eyes go angry and his cheeks go red. Louis says, “Don’t start that gay film in yer head, now.” 

Harry’s cheeks go white in an instant, _shit no filter! Fuck, should not ‘ave said that!_ Harry’s voice is closer than expected when he leans into Louis ear to whisper “Don’t start wanking to me now! I already got one friend with benefits. You’re out of luck.” Harry taunts him, Louis can’t tell if it’s a joke and his blood boils again.

Liam walks over beaming, “it’s a done deal!” He looks proud, but Louis is still watching Harry’s back retreat while his own fists are shaking at his side. “Hold your applause.” Liam complains.

“Applause for what?” Zayn asks, when he joins the two.

“Not that important.” Liam smiles at him, his hand on Zayn's bicep when he asks “how’re you?”

“Alright.” Zayn says.

“Everyone on the bus. Now please!” Ms Horlyck calls. The sixth formers start shuffling to the buses. Louis jumps up the steps and passes Harry sitting with Niall in the middle somewhere. He plops down next to Jade. 

“You look mad.” She ascertains. 

“Cheers.” Louis pulls the hoodie over his head. 

“Is she your mother?” Jade asks, amusement shadowing her voice. Louis looks to the window, where his mother is knocking against the glass and throwing him a kiss. Jade is snickering in the window seat. “She’s cute.” Louis waves at her with warm ears. “She actually looks like you. I don’t think I look like my mum at all.” 

“It’s a blessing and a curse.” Louis smiles. Jay walks away to throw Lottie a kiss on the other bus. The buses start moving. “How was yer weekend? Took Halloween pretty hard, love.” 

“Better. Perrie stayed with me all weekend.” She smiles, and Louis leans back in his seat. Shifting his hips so that he is facing her, lying uncomfortably on his side. “Didn’t knaw ye were scared of clowns.” 

Jade bites her lips, just the topic alone makes her a bit skittish. “My brother, Karl, loves Horror films. He made me watch ‘IT’ with him. Scared me to death. It’s been a problem ever since.” 

Louis smirks, “to be fair, sounds like something I would do to Lottie.” Jade giggles. 

“Brothers are a pain.” Jade says. 

“Accept when yer laast name’s Payne. Pretty sure tha’ he’s the sweetest little thing t’ his sisters.” Louis says and looks to the two seats in front of them, where Liam and Zayn took their seats. Their heads are stuck together while they discuss something secretively. 

“Might be right, but Zayn’s a pain to his sisters I know that!” Jade retorts. 

“I kna.” Louis agrees. He sniffles a moan and lets his eyes close slowly. His mind goes blank, almost forgetting Nick’s presence this morning. Jordan’s words running in a loop ‘He’s not a bad guy.’ ‘Quite funny.’ _Harry likes the funny ones._

Thirty minutes later he wakes up again. Jade is terribly close all of a sudden, talking through the little space between their chairs. “I’m not ready.” Someone whispers through the crack, behind Louis.

“Pez. We’re not cowards. Anyone say something dumb I’ll beat them myself.” Jade retorts. Louis sniffles in his seat and is met with Jade’s brown eyes. She ignores him and keeps talking to Perrie “I’ve fought all my life because of my skin colour and just because I am an Arab. I’m done suppressing who I am!” It’s quiet for a moment, and Louis contemplates taking Jade’s free earbud of her headphone to distract himself. His side is numb, and he can feel his ass falling into the aisle. He wants to move desperately. 

Finally, Perrie says, “okay.” 

“What do you mean okay?” Jade’s face is now completely submerged between the seats, and Louis can only see her cheeks bunching against the cushions. She accidentally pushes Louis with her shoulder a bit. Louis grabs the seat in front of him to stable himself. He can hear Liam grumble, but he just shifts so he can finally sit right. Jade reappears. She’s smiling, and there’s a film on her lips. 

“Ye comin’ out?” Louis questions. Jade nods. Louis squeals like Daisy and falls around her neck. They embrace for a moment, before Louis moves again and stick his own face through the seats. His cheeks scratch on the rough material. “Proud of ye.” Louis grins at Perrie. Leigh-Anne snickers into her hand when the other girls share a confused look with her. When Perrie doesn’t answer him, Leigh uses her hand to push Louis’ face back.

An hour later, the bus stops for the first time to allow a bathroom and lunch break. Louis beams down the steps and grabs his money from his bag to buy himself a lunch from the sausage wagon. He stands in line, when there is a push from the back. “Getting yourself a sausage Tomlinson?” 

Louis turns around to Ashton. “Yeah, with a bun. So I can push the sausage in its fold.” Louis cringes from the disgusting remark, but continues nonetheless “I’m sure when it’s yer turn the folds will ‘ave sold out. Just get a peensie little weenie.” Ashton looks disgusted, and Louis is too. He turns around again and ignores the brut behind him. 

He walks over to Zayn and Liam with his hot dog in hand. Liam is chewing on his mothers extravagant sandwich, while Zayn tries to chew down some cucumbers. “Still not eatin’ proper?” Louis asks. Zayn looks up and just shrugs. Liam reaches back inside his bag and pushes his second sandwich into Zayn’s hand.

“Just try it.” Liam smiles encouragingly. “My mother makes the best.” 

“Yeah that’s true.” Louis muses and stuffs a large portion of the hot dog into his mouth. His mouth closes over the sausage, when his eyes lock with Harry. His large mouth hangs open, staring at Louis lips, while his own toast is forgotten in his hand. _He probably has one of them stupid overrated avocados on them._ Louis rolls his eyes at the annoyance that is known as the avocado and starts chewing. Delayed he realises that his eye roll must have looked like overjoyed pleasure. _Oops._ Zayn and Liam are talking again so Louis tries to focus on something other than the curly haired boy on the other side of the lot. 

“Speaking of…” Liam says. “Ashton just give you trouble?” 

“Nah.” Louis shakes his head and brushes the back of his hand over his ketchup stained lips. “Just making sure he kna’s who’s in charge, mate.” Zayn raises an eyebrow, while he nibbles on the edge of his sandwich like a child. 

“Good.” Liam nods. “Last year, there was a Fair near the hostel. They had roller coasters and everything.” 

“Already checked, it’s not on the itinerary.” Zayn interjects. “We got bowling tonight.” He rolls his eyes and picks out the salad to stuff at least that into his mouth. 

“I like bowling.” Louis says. 

“I’m not saying it’s bad, just saying a Fair be nicer, aye?” Zayn waves the sandwich in front of Louis, the content dangerously sloshing about.

“So we sneak out.” Louis says. “We’ll be stuck in ‘learning seminars’ all day. It’ll be so borin’ no one will notice.” Liam goes pale, he’s never done something this reckless. “Mate,” Louis leans forward to say it directly into his face “ye heard the same shit last year!” He straightens again and grins at Zayn, who is smiling honestly for the first time in weeks. “Nothin’ t’ miss.” 

“It’s a plan.” Zayn grins. He’s giddy from the excitement, and nudges Liam with his foot.

“No.” Liam says. _Such a stickler._

Before Louis can combust like usual, Zayn says “I’ll make a deal, if you come to the Fair, I’ll start eating more.” His voice had been darker than usual, and Louis didn’t like the look on Liam’s face, merely because he couldn’t place it. Liam nods his head like a seal. “I’m not going on a roller coaster, though.”

“What?” Louis is flabbergasted. “The fuck else would ye do?” 

“Language Tomlinson!” Ms. Cole says as she passes by, winking at Liam. 

“What’s happenin’ with tha’?” Louis asks. Liam grins and takes a huge bite, so he doesn’t have to answer. 

“Bucket list.” Zayn says, his eyes narrowed in on the smaller teacher walking to the bathroom. 

“ANYONE NEED THE WASHROOMS, DO IT NOW!” Almost all the girls get up and hurry to the loos. 

“Bucket list?” Louis asks.

“Pull a teacher once in your life.” Liam says, but he’s frowning at Zayn. 

“That’s just preposterous.” Louis feigns shock. 

Liam ignores both of them. They can hear him say “idiots” under his breath. 

Zayn grins at Louis “have you?”

“A teacher?” Louis asks. Zayn nods. “Nah, ye?” Zayn remains frozen, still grinning, and Louis shakes his head. “I don’t think I want to know who.” 

“Suit yourself.” Zayn grins and stands up to follow Liam to the bus.

“Don’t forget to write salad and one teeny cucumber into yer diary, mate.” Louis snickers. Zayn throws the remaining stub of a cucumber at his face, the sandwich carefully cradled in his hand.

💚🍑💙

“Alright, you all know the drill. Two pairs in one room, sharing a bathroom with two other pairs!” Mr. Walsh, the geography teacher, calls over the heads of the teenagers, who have formed a circle around him. He’s holding a large number of keys in his hands and standing on a stool in the lobby of the hostel. “When I call your name, you come up, grab your key, get the itinerary from Madame Horlyck, grab extra keys from Ms. Cole and go to your rooms. We will meet here in an hour!” He swallows and holds up a clipboard. “Burton and Tomlinson Charlotte room 15 with Calder and Smith.” The girls shuffle forward. “Irwin and Hood room 22 with Clifford and Hemmings.” The boys burst through the group to claim the key first, see who gets to keep it. 

“Everyone gets a key.” Ms. Cole scolds. Irwin looks irritated when he stares at her.

“Palvin and Edwards, room 16 with Thrillwall and Jennings.” Jade and Perrie smiled at each other and walked to collect their keys. _Bribing seems to be the way to go here, hope Liam wasn’t joking earlier_. Walsh continued blabbering on and on about rooms. Taylor, the mascot, ended up rooming with the girl Rachel that looked like a copy of Eleanor, and Zayn ended up in a room with Tommy, Lottie’s boyfriend. Louis made a mental note to make him look over the situation. Wouldn’t want Lottie sneaking into their room at night. “Payne and Tomlinson Louis room 28 with Horan and Styles.” 

Louis beamed, _28 me lucky number! This’ll be a gran’ trip!_ Niall had jumped forward and snatched a key from Mr. Walsh, who almost fell over from Niall’s enthusiasm. _Go Niall!_ Louis snickered when he collected his key from Ms Cole. “Your adjacent room is… oh … with Mr Malik, and…” Ms. Cole harsh Newcastle accent drifted to them quietly. 

“Ah cool. Cheers Cheryl.” Liam winks. _Cheryl, really Cheryl? That’s her first name? Cheryl? What kind of a name is Cheryl?_ They slipped into the elevator, and Harry’s long fingers pressed 2. “Let’s make something clear right now, older form gets lower bunks. Always been, always will be!” Liam said and Niall rolls his eyes. 

“First come first served.” Niall says. 

“Yer going to make me prove to ye how slow ye’re Horan?” Louis says, mischief twinkling in his eyes. In no time, the door flies open the three teammates share a look and bolt. Harry grumbles behind them, when he gathers their bags and pushes them one after another out of the elevator. He’s the baby giraffe, _baby giraffe don’t run_ , is what he tells himself. He leaves the bags in front of the elevator and casually walks into their room at the end of the hall. 

Louis is sitting on the bottom bed on the right hand side like a hen. Sweat is building on his forehead when he stares at his teammates. Niall tries to get onto Liam’s lower bunk bed that is right next to the window. But Liam has a secure position and kicks him off with his feet. “Your luggage is in the hall.” Harry says, bored.

“Can’t you see we’re fighting for life and death over here?” Niall complains, and Louis snickers.

“Want to top me?” Louis asks Harry, smiling at the implication. Harry still looks bored, but his eyes betray his nerves by dotting around the top bunks. He contemplates for a moment, it’s obvious he wants to say no. 

“Niall, can I take this bunk, don’t like sleeping next to a window?” Niall shrugs and falls to the floor for the tenth time. He whines and gives up. 

“Such a baby.” Liam giggles. 

“Get our things Nialler.” Louis declares.

“Fuck off, do it yourselves.” Niall grumbles and storms out of the room. 

Liam follows him, “make sure he doesn’t steal the bed.” 

“Cross me heart, love.” Louis says. Harry hoists his duffle on one of the small chairs and unpacks a few small things like his toiletries and hairbrush. “Yer hair is gettin’ long.” 

Harry turns around to him, and plays with the end of his corkscrew curl, like before it bounces when he lets go. “Yeah… do you like it?” His voice betrays him, just like his eyes have, he’s careful. Hopeful. Even nervous.

Louis gives him his most reassuring smile, “a lot! Look like a princess.” 

“That’s very offensive.” Harry pouts, the tender broken, he turns back to his bag. Louis mumbles something under his breath about how stupid he himself is and his head falls on the pillow. 

“So we’re going to explore this dump?” Niall asks, throwing his suitcase into a corner. 

“Been here last year.” Liam says, carefully propping his hard-shell trolley on one of the chairs. 

“I’m in!” Louis grins, jumping off of his bed. _Shit, me suitcase._ “None of ye idiots thought of bringin’ me bag?” 

“Why should we?” Liam argues. “Not our problem you’re so idiotic.” 

“Hey.” Louis whines. 

“I’m taking a shower first.” Harry says, gabbing a small bag with shampoo and sorts. “Wait for me, yeah?” He directs the question toward Niall. 

“Fine. Hurry up, Harold.” Louis says. He walks past him to get to the hallway, his hand automatically touches Harry’s smaller back, a chaste touch he really can’t retain. Harry’s like a magnet, Louis always needs to touch. Harry quickly hurries into the bathroom, making sure both doors are locked. 

The boys are bored waiting for Harry. Zayn has come over, and they wait lounging on the bunks. Niall is the worst he’s walking up and down in front of the small bathroom door, when he suddenly stops. Liam stops telling them a story mid-sentence to look at Niall, pressing his nail into the bathroom door. He looks up with a grin on his face. “What is it Niall?” Liam asks.

“We could totally open this up!” Niall grins, he’s too excited. “First prank of the trip!” Louis wants to say no. Protect Harry. But he’d love to see Harry naked again, his naked skin is like a drug! And Louis was suffering withdrawal.

“What do we need?” Louis jumps off the bed.

“A coin!” Niall says. Zayn rummages through his pockets, his body half covering Liam in the attempt to get to the round object. Liam huffs from the added weight on him.

“Here!” Zayn reaches over and Louis quickly takes it out of his hand. They are giggling when they push the penny into the slit and move it to the side. The door unlocks and creak’s open.

The first thing Louis sees is the white fog coming from the hot water. The bathroom is quite small, two basins on his right and a tiny shower, Harry barely fits in. He has to bend a bit, so his large form fits beneath the shower-head. Louis watches a few water droplets run down his shoulder and over his shoulder blade. Travelling down the small of Harry’s muscular back and over his perfectly round butt cheek. _So delicious._ They are round and firm, yet puffy and cute. _Perfect. The boy is perfect_.

“Hey! Bugger off.” Harry says. He’s cradles his cock in his hands, _God, he has to use both hands to hide the gorgeous thing_. His face is red and his curls fall into his eyes. He tries to kick at them, but the shower door is in the way. “Fuck off!” He whines, embarrassment higher now.

Niall giggles and Louis says “thought yer not afraid of being naked, mate.” He’s shaking a can and tries to doze Harry with his deodorant.

“There’s a time and place.” Harry calls, coughing from swallowing the deodorant spray. He starts hurling things at them. Niall retreats, ushering Louis backwards as well. They stumble back into the room, Zayn and Liam shift in the bed. 

“Worth it?” Zayn asks.

“Yupp. Squealed like Bambi.” Louis giggles and throws himself back onto his bed, looking up at Harry’s bed. It only takes a few more minutes until Harry re-appears, only wearing a towel around his waist. Louis eyes land on the snug tight garment sitting around his gluts. He quickly avoids his eyes before he pops a boner in front of his friend.

“Finally!” Liam practically runs to the door, accidentally causing Zayn to fall onto the floor with a loud thud. 

“Wait, wait, wait.” Harry begs, his sinful legs are only halfway in his tight jeans. Honestly, it’s a wonder he gets them on so easily. He’s jumping on his left foot, while watching his friends quickly run through the door. Louis catches Harry by his arm, when he almost drops to the floor. Louis might be a bit disappointed that the towel doesn’t drop, to Louis knowledge it really should have with all the stumbling Harry was doing. But now he is faced with a proper view of Harry’s bird tattoo for the first time. _They do ‘ave eyebrows_. Louis lifts his eyes from the black paint and flicks one of the four nipples. 

“Don’t forget to lock up, Curly.” He runs through the door and hears Harry clumping through the room. Louis jumps into Niall’s side, trying to establish his superiority. Niall pushes back and the two stand in front of the elevators trying to push each other away. Zayn looks bored while he peals on his fingernails next to them. Liam keeps looking back to see if Harry will make it on time, it made him angsty, not being in control.

The elevator doors ding open. Niall and Louis keep pushing at each other in front of the dialling buttons. A certain curly haired boy makes it through the door, just as they close on them. His slightly wet hair looks shiny underneath the caramel-coloured hat, and his dark blouse exposes his cross necklace. “Grand t’ see ye too, Harold.” Louis grins, falling over when Niall kicks him against the chin. The two of them tumble to the sticky floor. The doors dings open again announcing the bottom floor. 

“Don’t get stuck.” Harry giggles when he takes a large step over the two of them.

The hostel is located off of the main road, on the edge of a small forest. It has three levels. The girls are on the first and the boys are located on the second floor. There is a small dining room, game room and a common room, which will be used as training rooms for the next days. Outside, Louis and the boys find a few other students already competing at table tennis. After a nervous look to the watch, Louis is able to convince Liam and the others to fallow the small path to the beach. In about 5 minutes they have reached the sandbank. The wind is cold, so Louis cuddles himself deeper into the thin material covering his arms. He takes off his shoes to walk to the water. “It’s going to be cold Lou.” Harry says. His large feet a second away from the splashing sea. 

Louis runs in, the cold water laps up to his shin. His toes freeze up, and he can feel the cold running into his bones. “Eh… co-old.” Louis quickly runs back and berries his feet in the sand, hopping the density will warm him up. He looks back up, to see Harry standing in the cold water reaching his ankles. “Ye ‘ave to go further in!” Harry looks back to him, but there’s a small smile on his lips when he runs into the water, his black jeans soak up. “Shower was for nothin’, yeah?” 

Harry giggles when he runs back to where Louis is standing. He too buries his toes under the sand. “At least I don’t smell.” 

Louis’ can feel his eyes go wide, pushing his nose into the crook of his armpit. He sniffles, loudly “smell gran’ boy!” He shakes his head. Harry’s still smiling, which Louis counts as a success. _Should I start talking to him? Can I ask him what came over him on Halloween? Can I ask him if it will happen again?_ Louis opens his mouth to talk, but God isn’t too keen on him tonight. Liam stomps over, demanding they go back to the hostel. His face is red, and he’s blabbering about the introduction announcement they could be missing.

When the five of them, partly wet, burst through the door, the introduction has already started in the dining room. The boys didn’t miss much. Mr Walsh goes over the rules, bed times, wake ups, itineraries and the most important: leave the premisses without gaining permission gains you a first class ticket home! Liam is slightly skittish from this, but for the first time Louis has the feeling that he might also be quite excited to break the rules.

They eat, though, Zayn tells him not to. He says there are Hamburgers waiting for them at the bowling alley. “They never eat my food on the first day.” Louis overhears one the weightier guy in a white apron cry, which obviously has something to do with them going to the bowling alley. This, of course, gets mentioned by the long-haired emo receptionist. Louis smirks at the scene before he runs to join the lads in the bus. 

Harry, Zayn, Liam, Louis, Niall play against Eleanor, Taylor, Alana, Sophia and Meg. Louis is fitting his small feet into his shoes. He’s not quite sure why he’s suddenly complaining about his height again. Maybe it’s because he’s seated two seats down from Harry, who is goofing around again, uneasy on his feet while he stumbles into his shoes. Louis feels his heart flutter, _nope that does not happen. There is nothing fluttering. Nothing!_ _I am forbidding my body to do that!_ “Heard ye went there mate.” Louis says to Liam nodding toward Sophia, who is sitting far enough away for her not to overhear them.

“What?” Liam’s ears are incredibly red.

“Sophia. You. ‘alloween.” Louis says, as if Liam were slow.

“Sort of…” Liam tries to wheedle himself out of an answer.

“How does that happen… sort of?” Harry asks on the other side of Liam. Interest clearly peaked and sparkling in his meadow-like eyes.

Liam rakes a quivering hand through his hair, while his eyes nervously shift around “…just snogged for a bit.” Liam lied. Louis could tell. _But why lie? Who was he lying to?_

The girls called them over to write their nicknames into the system, so they could start playing. Harry sits down with Taylor and started typing the names down. Zayn takes a seat, where Liam had just sat. “He had something with Sophia?” 

“Danielle broke his heart a night earlier, just a small re-bound.” Louis says.

“Right.” Zayn says, his dark eyes have gone darker. Louis doesn’t like that look.

“Tommo, you’re up!” Niall called over, having missed a few of the pins by the look of his sulky expression.

“Gran’.” Louis made a show to warm up his arms. He delicately picked out the right ball, choosing the baby pink one, because his fingers feel snug in them. The purple one was like warning Dan’s shoes, utterly disappointing. Louis walks up to the lane and swings the pink ball up to his face, kisses it, before swinging his arm, so he could roll it perfectly. He stays bent over, when he watches the ball ring down all pins. He jumps up, wiggling his small body in the air, squealing “Strike! Strike! Strike!” The small monitor above the benches tells him ‘Tommo the tease’ got a strike. He gurgles a laugh and looks over to Harry, who had dubbed him with it. Harry was entirely too distracted by Louis’ bum. The way it had stretched over the material of his jeans while he was leaning over, exposing a peach like display. The way it had wiggled from excitement, showcasing the squeezable-ness of it, it made his fingers twitch in excitement. 

Suddenly, Louis appeared next to Harry “did I ever tease ye, Styles?” He asks. Harry shivers a little, but doesn’t answer.

Harry stands up, towering over Louis. It’s maddening how fast Louis wants to go into submission. _But I will be damned if I allow that, straighten spine, chin up, stare back! “_ I think you know the answer to that.” Harry says.

“Care to repeat it then?” Louis grins. 

“Says the right one… I remember you being the first to pop one… against a tree.” Harry says. But the small smile which had been on his lips since the beach is gone, and the general dislike of Louis is back. The green eyes missing their sparkle, and regaining some of its darker sides. 

“I remember ye liking it too.” Louis whispers, while he steps closer, finger poking at his abs. _Magnet_. Louis fingers always attached to Harry’s skin. Harry’s hand grabs his fingers and dejects them from his body. 

“I was drunk.” Harry clarifies, and Louis’ heart shouldn’t sink so far, nor so fast. Harry rounds him to talk to Taylor of all people. Louis sits down next to Niall, grumbling to himself. _I mean where does Harry get off to. Just blaming tha’ night on alcohol. How dare ‘e? Really? A night where I finally felt closer to Harry again, where Harry was so into me, so drunk on me skin that ‘e couldn’t stop ‘imself. Can’t 'e remember tha’? The desperation to stand between me open legs. Even when Jade was staring at us. Or do I remember tha' wrong? I’ll show ‘im!_ Louis nods to himself. 

“Where the hell is Zayn?” Niall asks, Louis hadn’t noticed that he was sitting beside him. Louis looked around to see where the raven-haired boy had gone off to. Harry had finished his set, he hadn’t got a strike like Louis. Louis stands up to look for him, but quickly sees him. He has a murphed smile on his face, when he weasels himself back to them. “Your turn, mate.” Niall says. Zayn gives Louis a smug look and quickly gets to the lane to throw his balls. Louis sits back down, and briefly questions where Zayn’s been.

Zayn couldn’t enjoy his unexpected success, because there was a commission from two lanes down. Jade, the little minx, had scored her first Strike, ever!, and Perrie had hoisted her into a tough embrace. Right at the beginning of the lane, where the bowler swings his arms, two girls were giving each other a kiss on the mouth. And it wasn’t one of those OMG-we-are-best-friends-kiss, we-are-girls-we-just-do-that. No, this was a kiss between lovers. It was the way Jade cradled Perries ponytail delicately, and the way Jade was gripping into Jade’s hip. “The fuck?” Louis could hear Ashton scream, aghast.

“You got something to say?” Jade asked, her hand on her hip, finally dislodged from Perrie again. “ ‘cause I’ll box you all the way to Benghazi!” 

Ashton held up his hands, “looks great love!” 

Louis goes by instinct and steps on to his table, screaming “To Perrie and Jade. To grand love!” A few cheers were heard, but most people were incredibly stunted. Louis took a drink from his coke, he could see a woman approach with two burgers, and Louis thought that’s what Zayn had been doing, ordering them food. But his eyes fall on Harry. He’s staring at Louis, a hard line of heartbreak and anger in his iris. Louis watches him stumble to get away from there, but with the most grace he could muster he stood back up and walked over to the bathroom. 

“You knew about this?” Zayn asks, while helping Louis down.

“Sure.” Louis says, “it’s hard to miss, to be honest.” Louis clarifies while he is busy falling Harry with his eyes. Zayn just watches him. They both grab their burgers and start eating. Louis is very hungry, but Harry hasn’t come back yet. And it worries him more than the ache in his stomach. If he were honest with himself the ache in his stomach results from something very different. 

Louis quickly stands up and starts walking towards the bathroom. He can feel Liam’s eyes on him, as well as Niall’s, who he passes at some point. When he pushes through the men’s loo door, Louis’ eyes quickly fall on the lanky figure standing in front of the basin. He’s just staring at his own eyes, when the green fall on the reflection of Louis’ body. “You alright love?” Louis asks him.

And maybe if Louis could have had a larger grasp, he would have understood Harry was sad, because Jade and Perrie kissed in front of the entire college. Even-though Perrie didn’t want to come out, because she was embarrassed about the whole situation with Zayn, how it had gone through scuttlebutt like wildfire, that even though Perrie was scared she did it for Jade. She did it for love. And there was this hate, because two girls could stand up and kiss, and he as much as says he’s gay, he gets beaten. But all Harry says is “yeah.” 

“We’re missin’ ye out there.” Louis says, a little nervous, watching Harry’s back so tense, knuckles going white from the forceful grab on the marble. 

“Are you really?” Harry asks, abruptly turning around. The anger overtaking him. _And God does he look hot when he’s enraged!_ Eyebrows tightly knitted together, while his eyes roam for any clues from the smaller boy. Harry stagers forward like he’s on a mission, causing Louis to walk backwards quickly. Louis, a bit scared now, walks in a tiny circle, which ends them on opposite sides all of a sudden. Louis’ back facing the hand dryers, rather than the door to the bowling hall.

“Of course we do.” Louis says. “I do.” 

“Your shit at showing it!” Harry says, to Louis shock even more angry.

“But I ‘ave, ‘aven’t I? I can’t stop thinking about ye.” Louis pleads.

“Well you’re shit at showing it. One night won’t change that!” Harry says, he’s still staring down at Louis and it makes his pants tighter.

“I swear, all I did the entire weekend after ‘alloween is wank to the thought of ye.” Louis blabbers, he’s not quite sure why he’d go with that, but it’s all he could think about. “I think me cock’s shaved.” Harry’s eyes haven’t shifted from him, when he surprises Louis. His hand grab for his pants and tugs them under the swell of Louis’ bum. Harry grabs Louis semi and starts punishing him with frantic strokes. 

Louis snickers out a moan. His back shifting into a curl like a cat.

Harry uses his free hand to open his own button of his jeans. Louis doesn’t need to be asked, stroking past Harry’s soft hand still on his button and his fingertips glide down his warm skin, waiting for the briefs he can push his hands past. _Fuck he’s going commando_ , Louis moans out in a gasp to show his appreciation. He doesn’t have the time to push down Harry’s own pants, because Harry’s already bucking up into Louis’ hand.

They stay standing like this, hectically rocking into each other’s hands, foreskin rubbing over their cock-head’s while they desperately flick each other off.

“Oh fuck.” Harry moans at a partially hard tug.

“Harry.” Louis slings his free arm around Harry’s tall neck. Rubbing over his cock faster. Louis moans loudly when Harry flicks his wrist perfectly. Harry’s arm comes around to squeeze his bum. “Ye like me bum?” Louis taunts him.

“Nhg…yeah.” Harry manages to say. His index finger slips between Louis’ cheeks, a teasingly slow touch.

“Fuck, babe, come for me.” Louis moans through his orgasm. Mouth hanging open to enjoy his orgasm and not failing his speed on the other boy’s cock.

“Fuck, fuck, fuuuu-k.” Harry comes all over Louis hands, and Louis strokes him through his spasm. Harry’s forehead falls against Louis, and Louis shifts his face up like a cat into the space beneath him to give him a short kiss. “Can’t happen again.” Harry whimpers, his brain slowly starting its gears up again.

“Never.” Louis snickers. “Looks like I’m just as addictive to ye as ye are to me.” Harry drops his hand from Louis’ cock, and it falls flaccid against his sipper. Louis is still stroking his thumb over Harry’s tip. He shivers when his cock tries to get hard again. 

“Please stop.” Harry moans. Louis momentarily lets go of Harry’s cock. He rubs his hand over his shirt to get his release off of his shirt and onto his hand. He uses the slick to grab Harry’s cock one more time. The tall boy shivers again. “What…?” He doesn’t get to finish his question, because Louis starts to hold Harry’s tip in a cradle of his fingers. With his slicked up thumb, he pushes his finger towards his tip and slips his thumb in between Harry’s foreskin and the most sensitive part of his cock, slowly rubbing over the slit with the print of his finger. 

Harry moans obscenely, watching as Louis’ thumb bulges beneath his foreskin. Louis scratches Harry’s hair with his inferior hand, kissing along his jaw to bite his earlobe. “Can’t…” Harry moans. There is commotion outside, but Louis won’t let Harry go, so he winds the arm that was around Harry’s neck to fit it around his slim waist. Slowly, he moves them into a stall, keeping his delicate touch around Harry. Louis’ back hits the wall, when Harry rocks forward, there’s a pained expression on his face, when Louis’ nail scratches against his skin. 

“Don’t.” Louis warns, holding tightly on Harry’s waist to keeping him from humping. 

“I need… I need more.” Harry whines. His cock fully hard again. 

“Say please.” Louis mocks. There is a short silence, where Louis fears that Harry will run away, leave him standing here, dick out and all.

“Please…” He whispers, almost inaudible. Louis lets go of his cock again and pushes his thumb past Harry’s cherub lips. Harry carefully licks over Louis thumb like a kitten. 

“Good job,” Louis grins when he removes his thumb. Harry’s head goes red from the compliment, but Louis can see his erection bob in the air. He cradles his cock again, rubs his foreskin down and out of the way, to place the spit covered thumb over the exposed head. He starts rubbing him. Harry moans more freely now. “Good boy.” Louis whispers hotly into his ear and Harry’s hand twitch at his sides. Louis kisses his cheek and sucks on the cut of his jaw.

“Louis more please.” Harry whines high. Louis rolls his eyes.

“So fockin’ needy.” Louis snickers into Harry’s ear. He lets go of him, grabs his hips and switches their positions. Harry falls against the wall, curls bouncing from the head’s impact with the stall. Louis’ knee squishes between his legs and rubs his balls. With his hand he grabs the base of Harry’s dick again. His fingers push upward along the vein until he reaches the small indented V where the foreskin and cockhead starts, and he applies pressure.

“Louis OH Fuck!” Harry throws his head back and looses the strength in his knees a bit, making Louis rub his knee a little harder against Harry’s sack. 

“It’s alright babe,” Louis whispers, rubbing his free hand over Harry’s six-pack. He gets an idea, and with his free hand he grabs Harry’s foreskin and pulls at it, so that the skin shuts together over the cock-head, where Louis is holding it closed. The pulling and added pressure to his V makes Harry’s legs wobble and twitch at his sides. “Go for it baby.” Louis smiles at the lanky boy. 

“I want to… don’t know if I can.” Harry says, beads of sweat are glistering on his forehead and there is a crease between his eyebrows. 

“Ye can do it,” Louis whispers, harsher he adds “do as yer told, come for me.” Harry moans loudly, his stomach contracts and white beads start dripping past his foreskin and down his cock. “Good boy, that’s so yummy… look at it drip.” Louis lets go of his foreskin, while holdingthe cock with his right hand he slowly pulls down the foreskin over his cock again. Harry’s come which had gathered in the closed cup of his foreskin, spills down his long shaft. Harry’s face is exhausted and subdued, but his watery eyes are watching Louis’ amazement. Louis gathers some of his cum on his fingers.

“What are you doing?” Harry asks weakly.

“Just want to know what you taste like.” A painful moan erupts out of Harry, when his sensitive cock tries to twitch again. Louis laps at a bit of come, “like salt and vinegar, babe.” 

Harry’s hand shoots up and grapes the tiny fingers, to pull them away from Louis’ mouth. He’s smiling, “stop.” 

Louis grabs some toilet paper and cleans his hand, and Harry silently hides his cock back behind the sipper of his pants. Louis gives him some paper too. “Shit. Me shirt’s all messy.” Louis stares down at the load of come that is still on his shirt. Harry’s cheeks remain rosy. 

“Can you turn it inside out?” Harry asks. He looks immaculate as always. 

“Ye just want t’ see me naked.” Louis grins. He feels his tummy bulge against his shirt from the burgers earlier. “Turn around.” Louis instructs. He sees Harry face the stall door, though, his eyes let Louis know he thinks this is unnecessary. 

“Last time you wouldn’t let me see you either.” Harry says. Louis finger twitches at the hem of his shirt. He quickly tares it over his head and turns it inside out. “You’re beautiful Louis, no matter who tells you different.” 

Louis doesn’t want to talk about this right now, so he turns around to face Harry’s back. Grabs around his soft love handle, Harry gasps silently, and Louis clicks open the door. He gives Harry a small shove, and he stumbles to the basin. Louis sees himself in the mirror, there still are large stains on his shirt. “Fuck. Look at me.” _No one will believe this was El, with ‘er sittin’ outside. What will I do?_ “Everyone will think I wanked in the loo.” Louis whines. 

Harry washes his hand. “I have a jumper outside.” 

Louis’ eyes find the green reflection. He shrugs “Cheers.” Harry dries his hand on his pants. 

“I’ll go get it quick.” Louis nods. While Harry is gone, he checks his neck, sadly there are no new love bites. _I’m pretty sure I left some on ‘im, though. Maybe that’ll teach Taylor to stay away._ Harry strides back into the loo with a warm looking black knitted jumper. He hands it over to Louis. It’s very soft in Louis’ hand.

“Cheers.” Louis says. He stares at his t-shirt. _Maybe I should remove it, not get Harry’s jumper all dirty._ Harry is staring at him. “Cheers, love. Gimme some privacy would ye? Need to take this off.” 

Harry nods a little awkward. His lip trembles a bit. Louis gives him a pointed look to make him say what ever is on his mind already. Harry’s hand reaches out to him again as if he wanted to grab him. His hands fall to his side, and he says “I like all of your curves.” 

Louis blinks at him, his cheeks are going hot and his heart is doing those stupid inconvenient fluttery-thing again. Harry rakes his hand through his locks, fingers getting stuck in some of them. “I really don’t understand why.” Louis finally manages to say. Harry steps forward and opens his mouth to say more, but there are two girls talking outside the girl’s loo, which jostles Louis. He holds up his hand and says “let me get dressed, Curly.” And he turns his back on him. Harry lets out a heavy sigh before he leaves the loo. 

Louis ignores the lane and makes motion for Liam to play his turn. He needs some fresh air. He smells the freedom before he sees him. Zayn is leaning against the wall outside, around a small corner, sucking on a blunt. “Thought ye quit.” Louis says.

“Want a hit?” Zayn asks instead. Louis nods and takes a drag. “How could I not see it? Perrie and Jade always so close.”

Louis shrugs, he really doesn’t want to talk about this right now. “Love falls where it falls.” 

Zayn laughs humorously. “Love don’t exist, mate.” 

“Ye turned pessimistic.” Louis says, and his eyes face the thin figure next to him. 

“You’re not going to tell me you’re actually in love with Eleanor. You don’t believe in that shit either.” Zayn argues, his hands clenching at his side for no reason at all.

Louis sucks in the air around them, “I’m falling, though. And ye were in love with Perrie, or ye wouldn’t be hurtin’ right now.” 

Zayn laughs darkly. “People grow up. Love doesn’t exist!” He stubs out the blunt on the pavement and walks away. Louis watches the doors slide open for him, and he sniffles back some tears. _The hell it does. Then why can I not forget ‘_ im?

When Louis walks back inside, he is faced with a crying Sophia. She had tried collecting her shoes again, but her ballerinas were all cut up. Louis had a sneaking suspicion burgers weren’t the only thing that Zayn had been doing when he left the lane earlier.

💚🍑💙

“I love being naked!” Harry screams, kneeling on his top bunk. He was proving he sleeps naked, by sitting up and showing the boys his pearly skin, his junk hidden by the pillow. 

“You’re off your fucking rocker, mate.” Louis says, while he stares at him standing in the doorway, toothbrush in his cheek. He can’t resist the urge to look, he’ll never get his fill of looking at the boy. 

“God, Harry put something on.” Liam complains, straightening his own shirt. 

“You should all try it, it’s freeing.” Harry says while he climbs down the tiny ladder of the bunk. 

“OH HARRY!” Liam complains, who turned around and staring at Harry’s balls at eye-level. Louis snickers about Liam’s face. Niall laughs too, he obviously has seen Harry naked as often as he’s seen Barbara naked, jealousy twist in Louis’ gut. 

Louis ignores his friends and sits down next to Jade at breakfast. “Oh, hey Tommo.” 

“I’m spreading the support.” Louis argues when he starts picking at his toast.

“Cheers.” Perrie giggles. 

“Zayn was upset last night.” Louis dishes the dirt. “Proper mad.” It’s less dirt, and more 

“I don’t care.” Jade says, which shuts Perrie’s worried expression down. “He was awful to you. So he can sod right off.” 

“In other news, we are paired for today’s activity.” Louis says. 

“I saw.” Jade grins. “ _Time Management and Utilisation._ What a stupid subject.” 

“At least that’s only an hour long. The one after that is two hours of torment on the lovely subject of _Literary Skills: Plagiarism, Research, Writing and How to ask for help._ Let me die now.” He directs his words towards the eggs on his fork, trying to demand it to turn into poison.

“Dramatic much?” Perrie asks. “Besides at least you’re with Jade. I have to spend my day with Eleanor and her clique.” 

Louis can sympathise, “try sitting with Meg. She’s less annoying than the rest, and she’s in Drama.”

“Cheers.” Perrie says earnestly. 

The first course of the day Louis sits in a small room next to the dining hall. His group has around 10 people in it, and Louis sits down with Jade, Barbara, and Michael Clifford. Louis has a small notepad in his hands. Ms Cole is running on and on about time management, Louis already knows he’s shit at it, no need to rub it in. He actually jotted down a few tips, when Jade leans over, they’re hidden in the back accordingly _Cheryl_ won’t see them immediately. “Thanks for your support.” Jade says. “Means a lot to us.”

“Us?” Louis mocks her accent. Jade rolls her eyes, “oh ye actually meant us, as in ye and Perr’eh. Already talking for both of ye, are ye?”

“Fuck off.” Jade giggles. She pushes a binder into Louis lap, Louis grins. It’s another game. This time it’s squared paper, every corner has been marked with a dot. The game is to connect the dots together, each player with their own colour of pen, eventually they will run out of lines to draw. The one colour with the most lines to the square wins that square. The most squares wins. They start drawing their lines while _Cheryl_ keeps rumbling. 

After an hour and a small break, in which he surprised Liam and pored a water bottle down the back of his shirt, his group listens to Walsh talk about literary skills. The game continues, and to no one’s surprise, not even Barbara sitting to Jade’s other side, Jade is winning. Again.

Barbara frees herself out of the situation by running to the loo, but Louis had seen the text from Niall on her phone. “They’re probably boning right now.” Louis says, envious of the action.

“Alright, eyes back on the prize.” Jade says, tapping the folder with her pen. They silently work for a moment, “I saw you, you know?” 

“What do ye mean?” Louis asks. 

“In the woods. I saw you with Harry.” Jade says. Louis’ pen slips on the page, making a curling line. “Oi watch out, you won’t win by cheating!” Jade grins. 

“Ye saw me and him doing what?” Louis asks, his heart is in his throat. It’s something he has been thinking about lately, but never dared to ask. 

Jade is looking at him now, secretly contemplating coming clean and deliberating if she should have just waited for Louis to come to her. Louis’ hand is having trouble holding on to his pen, muscles shivering as if he were cold. There’s also a ringing in his ear he can’t explain. “Just you two talking I guess, I was a little out of it… scared to death I was! I’m glad you two seem to be getting on again.” She lies, but Louis is so frantic he can’t tell. 

“Right, yeah.” Louis says, clearing his throat. He remains, uncharacteristically, quiet after that. At some point Jade rubs his back for a solid five minutes, for which Barbara gives them a weird look, her own state totally dissolved. 

“Lunch break, everyone.” Mr. Walsh finally releases them. “Remember at one thirty we reconvene outside. Bring water bottles, walking shoes and anything else you need for the hike. Thank you.” Louis quickly gathers his things and flees from Jade. He spends most of lunch running away from Liam and his water bucket. 

Ten minutes before the hike started, Louis walks over to Room 27 and knocks. The door swings open to reveal Tommy, Lottie’s boyfriend. He eyes Louis’ wet state. “Where have you been?”

“Just a water fight mate, keep your pants on.” Louis says and burgers into the room. He takes a deep breath, _no Lottie. Thank God._ He really does not want to start a fight right now. “I was wondering if I could borrow a shirt.”

“What?” Tommy still has his hand on the door handle. 

“It’s just that I only brought two shirts, this one soaked and the other one is soiled, so…” Louis lifts his hand as if he weighs something in his hand, “do ye mind?” 

Tommy blinks a couple of times but walks over to his bag. He holds a long-sleeve in his hand, “one condition, though.” 

Louis retracts his hand, his lips turning up into a smile, Tommy might be growing on him. “Go on then.”

“I give you this shirt, and you’ll stop micro-managing Lottie and me on this trip.” Tommy says. “And don’t give me that look, I know you told your mate, Zayn, to stalk me,” he’s pointing to one of the beds, where Zayn presumably sleeps. “I just want to have fun at this hike thing.” 

Louis contemplates his answer, “fine. You give me the shirt, I won’t bat one of me gorgeous eyelashes at ye and Lotts. And I’ll make sure Zayn sleeps in me room. Deal.” Tommy hands over the shirt, proudly at that. “Goodie.” Louis grabs the shirt “proud of ye, Tommy. Becomin’ like the family.” He snickers when he walks out the door. 

Fifty songs, a few lost kids recovered and a couple girl-freak outs because of spiders later, they reach the end the trail. “I can’t believe you’re making me do this.” Liam grumbles next to him.

“I can’t believe ye agreed, ye nutter.” Louis grins at Liam’s large black bag he was carrying on his back.

“I can take it.” Harry offers. His caramel-coloured hat is back on him, and Louis might be a little jealous of the sun protection he has right now.

“Nah, nah, nah… Not you.” Louis shakes his head, but Liam just laughs handing over the beg to Harry. “What ye doin’ mate?” He complains. “He shouldn’t be caring tha’.” Harry is walking to the cliff they just spend 2 hours getting to. “I’m trying to romance him.”

“Well get to it than before he finds your picnic on his own.” Liam rolls his eyes. Louis scolds, but runs after Harry. He has found a nice spot that looks over the hostel’s beach. “There’s a blanket in the bag.” Louis startles Harry, who was taking pictures with an impressive real camera.

“Oh.” Harry grabs the bag again and maddeningly slowly opens the top of it. 

“Let me.” Louis says, rips the bag out of the careful hands, and tares out the blanket. He levels it on the floor “sit yer perky bum down, love.” Amusement flickers in the green eyes, but he does as told. Louis sits down next to him and starts unpacking the picnic. Strawberries, avocado sandwiches (because Harry apparently likes them), water, dates rapped in bacon, etc. Harry’s green eyes go larger the more Louis gets out. 

“You made Liam carry all of this up for you?” He giggles, the corner of his eyes wrinkle.

“He agreed too.” Louis shrugs and unpacks the chocolate muffins. 

Harry starts looking around, “don’t you want to invite him… I mean he carried it up… should be able to eat some of it too.”

“Nope.” Louis says. Liam is currently distracting Zayn and Niall, so they can have a picnic in peace. “This is all for ye.” Louis says. 

“What?” Harry looks a bit shocked.

“I told ye. I’m romancing ye Harold!” Louis snickers and throws a plastic fork into Harry’s unknowing face. 

“Tying to sway me?” Harry asks, while he opens one of the small Tupperware boxes to free some fruit. 

“Is it workin’?” Louis asks. He puts the bag outside their small picnic area. 

“Maybe.” Harry smiles. “Maybe not. Not going to let you know.” He giggles to himself, and it might be the cutest thing Louis has ever witnessed. “Where’d you get this stuff?”

“Remember the burly cook?” Harry nods with knitted brows. “He thought the idea of a picnic was grand. He was so excited someone actually liked his cooking.” Louis grins at Harry, while picking at some dates.

They both eat a bit, before Harry’s deep rumble reappears “that’s not your shirt, though.” 

Louis looks down at Tommy’s shirt and back up at Harry, whose lips just sealed around a banana, the sight is quite arousing. “How’d ye kna Harold?” Harry’s cheekbones go rosy. “Ye know me entire closet? Ye that stalkerish?” Louis keeps teasing.

“No.” Harry says with certainty, while rubbing his hands on his black pants.

“Sure ye don’t, love.” Louis grins some more, “ye jealous?” Harry’s eyes go darker and his curls bounce from cheek to cheek as he shakes his head with thin lips. “It’s Tommy’s shirt.” Louis clarifies, trying to keep Harry here, before he’s had enough and runs off. “Lottie’s boyfriend. My other shirt was soiled, as ye well remember.” 

“Right.” Harry diverts his eyes again. “That was something.” 

They eat for a while until Harry rubs his tummy and carefully slides the empty boxes back into the bag. After a beat, watching Harry look out over the water, Louis scoots closer and snuggles himself against Harry’s side. He breathes in Harry’s musky scent and pushes his nose into Harry’s left peck. “I miss ye.” Louis says, quietly. Harry’s arm remains outstretched behind them, holding Harry up in a slanted seat. Louis wishes he’d initiated. Hug Louis against him, but he doesn’t. It stays in Louis purview to hug him tighter to his side. Harry’s hat rubs against the crown of Louis’ head.

“Are you cold?” Harry asks, his voice detached and cold.

“I’m always cold.” Louis mumbles, he’d love to fall asleep like this, would probably be the best sleep yet. Harry moves out of the embrace and gathers a baby blue blanket he had found in the bag. He drapes it over the two of them, and then shifts back into position. “Can I ask ye somethin’?” 

“Always.” Harry says, still staring into the landscape. Louis swings his arm around Harry’s waist and tugs him forceful into his side. Their hips crash against each other.

“What do ye see in ‘im? In Nick?” Louis asks against Harry’s muscle which covers his heart. Nustling the tip of his nose against the outside of his peck. The crook of his arm lets Louis breath in his scent the best, while reminding his face there is no greater achievement than curling against Harry’s muscle. 

Harry sighs dramatically. “I told you. He’s just a friend.” Louis’ hand slivers back across Harry’s tummy and rests his hand on the hip nudging against his own.

“He ain’t just a friend, love. I know this.” Louis bites Harry’s peck a bit, he lets out a little squeal. “Someone saw ye at the Base, sucking his cock.” Louis says, a little harsher now. Just the thought drives him off the cliff.

“He was sucking me off, though.” Harry replies, he’s smiling. Louis hates it.

“Same difference.” Louis says. He can still feel the anger in his words. He looks down at his fist, now lying on Harry’s thigh.

“No, it’s not.” Harry says, his own voice more angry than before. “He sucked me off. We were talking about the picture of me and Ash. And he found out that I have given a few blow jobs here and there, but never received one.” Louis gulps, this story is getting worse for him. His thumb starts rubbing into Harry’s tight muscle. Maybe that’ll calm him down a bit. “He offered to give me my first, so we ended up in the stupid bathroom. Didn’t know they heard us.” He finishes his story. 

Louis sits up to look into Harry’s face. He couldn’t figure out if Harry was thinking about Louis’ angry eyes or if he was simply proud of himself. His face is blank. _I can’t read him no more._ The realisation sends shivers through him, and despite the blue blanket he’s under. “He was yer first?” Louis asks, the green dragon steering in his abdomen. His fingernails bore into the seams of Harry’s pants.

“In that sense yes.” Harry says, nonchalant. 

“I’m going to kill him.” Louis lowly whispers. “I’m going to suffocate him in grease fat.” His envy isn’t helped when he hears Harry laugh. Harry’s hand comes up and covers his mouth, as if he could shove it back. Louis stupid stomach fluttered again. _Not the time. Not the place, mate._ Louis scolded his own guts.

“How are you going to do that?” Harry asks, amusement still twinkling in the deep green.

“Grease from Bell’s Fish&Chips. Trust me it’s nasty, he’ll hate to die like that!” Louis says, jaw tense.

“Hey.” Harry cocks his head and smiles, allowing his dimples to pop, “you were my first kiss.” 

“If ye would’ve asked, I would’ve given ye yer first blow job too.” Louis says. He can feel Harry’s thigh tighten in his angry grasp. But Harry doesn’t wiggle out of it. Louis pouts for good measure.

Harry looks around and then whispers, “you were also the first I gave a hummer too.” He smiles at Louis, his eyes darting to his thin lips for a second. Louis bites his lips looking at the plush pink lips across from him. Harry clears his throat and tries leaning away. 

Louis’ hand sneaks over his thigh up to his dick. He finds him half hard. “I’ve never.” Louis whispers. His hand rubs harder against Harry’s cock, while Harry watches him with dark green eyes and a face stone cold. “I’ve never given anyone a hummer.” Harry keeps his mouth pressed in a fine line, and a whiff of air spills through his nose. Just like a nose burp, showing Louis’ he’s doing something right, that there was a mona. A group is sitting close to them, but they don’t seem to realise anything. Louis decides he won’t mention the time when he fucked fake-Harry in Ibiza and shortly had his cock in his mouth. He figures that doesn’t count as a blow job anyway. “I must admit I’ve been thinkin’ about it. About takin’ yer cock in me mouth.” He gives a small squeeze. Harry’s eyes are dilated so far that his iris almost completely takes away the green in them. “It’s just so long and beautiful.” Harry grumbles again, but his eyes remain on Louis’ face.

“Stop.” Harry moans, looking over his shoulder. “This isn’t how you win me over.” Louis shrugs and takes his hand off of his cock. 

“Fine.” He says. Harry whines in annoyance. 

“Come on lads, we’re going back.” Ms. Horlyck says, when she passes them in the attempt to get all the kids ready. 

Harry and Louis are walking down the trail again. Liam, Niall and Zayn are kicking each other a few miles a head of them. Harry has the emptier bag back on his back, insisting after Louis had the idea, he’d be the gentleman to carry it back down. How was Louis supposed to argue with that.

After twenty minutes of comfortable silence Louis takes his confidence back and finally does what he has been thinking about the entire way up the trail. Louis’ hand carefully slides into Harry’s. The long fingers carefully thread together with the smaller ones, Louis can feel Harry’s eyes on him but he stays adamant in looking at the girls blabbering in front of them. The pressure on his hand feels calming, although slightly clammy. His nerve-endings in the rough balm of his hand feel like they connect the two together on another level. Harry’s thumb starts caressing the back of his hand and the ticklish feathery feeling travels through him rousing his inner wish to remain like this forever. 

_Everything feels perfect now._

One of the girls in front of them turns around and Eleanor stares at the two hands interlocked. There is a small proud smile on her lips when she stops walking until the two reach her three steps later. Harry wants to rip his hand away, but Louis squeezes his hand harshly allowing him to remain in his hand. “Hey Harry.” 

“Hi El.” Harry says quietly.

“Louis, we need to do something together at some point.” Eleanor reminds Louis. 

“Sure. Maybe tomorrow? Today won’t work.” He swings Harry’s hand a little. 

Eleanor laughs “Okay. Fine. Bye Harry.” She says and walks faster to rejoin her friends. 

“Bye El.” Harry says, even though Eleanor is out of ears reach. Louis smiles at him. “What was that?”

Louis just shrugs, he does not feel like explain himself and Eleanor for that matter right now. At some point the boys join them again, and Harry lets go of his hand, when he realises that Zayn is giving him weird looks. 

“Oi.” Louis suddenly says to Zayn, “almost forgot, mate. Ye’re stayin’ at our room tonight.” 

“Sure.” Zayn shrugs. “Not like I’ll miss any of the lads in my room.”

“Right.” Niall says. “I was going to stay with Barbs tonight.”

“How are ye goin’ t’ do that?” Louis asks. “Don’t they search rooms?”

“I can run through the bathroom and hide in the other room when they come. Last night the girls checked the times when they patrol.” Niall grins, proudly smiling about his girlfriends antiques.

“You can’t leave them alone with me.” Harry whispers to Niall.

Niall just lets out one of his rattling laughs and says “you’ll be fine.”

That night, after dinner, Harry was sitting on Louis’ bed playing cards with Zayn and Liam, the two of them on Liam's bed. When Mr. Walsh came around to shut off lights, Harry hid under Louis blanket, as Zayn hid under Liam’s. They quietly kept talking for a few hours. 

Louis can’t remember much of what was being said, except for the fact that Louis was being as obnoxious as ever. But he does remember Harry’s fingertips dancing across his hip, hidden under the blanket, his hands never leaving Louis’ skin. It was turning Louis into a horny mess. At some point, Louis tried to wiggle his bum into Harry’s crotch, but it turned out he was too far away from his touch for it to happen. So Harry kept teasing him all night. When he looked over his shoulder he could see Harry’s grin, _he knows exactly what he’s doing that dimpled bastard._

At two in the morning, Zayn had snuggled into Niall’s bed, and Liam had fallen asleep in his own bed. Harry shifts a bit and finally hurls his briefs onto the floor. Louis turns around to cuddle up to Harry. Though, some might argue that he was jet packing him, since he was so much smaller than Harry. His nose was in Harry’s neck, and Louis feel asleep drugged on the intoxicating smell.

💚🍑💙

On the third day, Louis spends breakfast with Eleanor and her annoying posey. He has to admit that he counts El as one of his closest friends by now, but most of her friends are quite unbearable. During breakfast, they are told “Tomorrow on our last night here, we want all of you to pack your things up, because we will be sleeping in small Tipi tents for a night. There are eight places in each Tipi, and everyone is allowed to pick your roommates on your own. Though no mingling tents. We’ll have breakfast there and then drive home on Friday.”

“If you don’t want us to have sex than you should make the gays bunk with the girls.” Ashton says, gaining a few laughs here and there.

“Maybe the baby’s should stay in the adult tent, too. Oh look Ash, that’ll be you, how cute.” Eleanor calls over to him. Gaining a few snickers.

“That’s enough.” Madame Horlyck screams. “The only rule in place is no girl and boy mingling. Anyone has a problem with that can stay in one of the teachers tents.” 

“Look at that, heard yer afraid of the dark, maybe ye need a little cuddle from the adults.” Louis whispers screams towards Ashton. 

“I don’t mind spooning Ms Cole.” Ashton snickers back. 

If Louis were a more sensible man, he wouldn’t react to it “yer not her type, mate. She’s more into the Payne’s of the world.”

“You’re having a laugh. She has a thing for Liam Payne?” 

“That’s what I said, yes.” Louis rolls his eyes. Eleanor grabs his collar and hurls him back to sit next to her. “What?” 

“Just shut it. They’re already staring at us.” She nods to the faculty, who are still rambling about the great opportunity of staying in a Tipi and cooking on their own. 

Louis gives Eleanor a few kisses, gaining a few annoying coos from Alana, before he moves over to the boys. “We’re set then? Ye’ll cover for us?” Liam asks, Jade and Leigh at the moment.

“Everyone is so spread out they won’t even notice.” Jade shrugs, she’s wearing a high ponytail that accentuates her curls and large black glasses.

“But you’ll have to cover for us tomorrow.” Leigh says.

“As long as yer not too late for the Tipi thing, no problem.” Louis grins.

“Wait ten minutes into the lesson, then you can leave. Every chaperone will be giving lessons. They won’t notice.” Jade instructs, as if the boys were useless without her. “How you getting there?” 

“Ordered us an Uber.” Harry says, wiggling his phone in front of them.

“OH Harry.” Louis squeals, poking the taller lad’s dimple. “So proud of ye.” The boys shake their heads and Jade just snickers into her jumper. 

Sneaking out of the hostel isn’t hard. As Jade had observed, all chaperones were giving a lesson in the morning, so all eyes were off of the lot. The Uber was waiting up the road and the five boys squished themselves inside. The drive to the fair was only 20 minutes and the boys hyped each other up on the possibilities of what they could do. 

“Uh let’s go on that!” Harry was grabbing Niall’s hand and pointing one of his ringed up fingers at the drop tower. Louis could feel his inside jump from the suggestion. Harry looked like a three year old in a toys-r-us store. Louis only knew this, since he used to work in one of them stores in Doncaster. 

“Yes, yes, let’s do that first.” Louis squealed. Because it was rather early in the day, there were barely any other visitors allowing the boys to get on as many rides as they want, with barely any lanes. 

Louis sat next to Liam on the drop tower, who was fidgeting. “It’ll be fine mate.” 

“I could fall off.” Liam whined. “Should have stayed on the ground with Zayn!” 

“Just close yer eyes.” Louis laughs.

“What good would that do?” Liam asks, while he closes his eyes. 

Louis grins, “nothing. Just be funny to see yer face when we drop.” As soon as Louis finishes his last word, the tower drops and Liam screams like his pants were on fire. His eyes go wide and bulge. But Louis can’t see much more than his own being drops to the ground at rapid speed. He’s still laughing when the tower stops and falls again. _This is what flying must feel like_.

Louis’ feet dangle above the ground, even when they are completely suspended. He ignores Harry’s outstretched hand, offering to help him down like a child, and jumps off himself.

Next they find a real roller coaster. “No.”

“Come on.” Liam says.

“Eh…No.” Zayn presses his thin lips into a line and shrugs while opening his eyes wider as if to say ‘never-going-to-make-me’.

“Come on, everyone is waiting.” Liam points over his shoulder at their friends.

“I don't want to do it, Liam.” Zayn says and brushes back his black slick hair, which had got so long as to fit into a tiny ponytail at the bottom of his head.

“Why not?” Liam kept pestering him.

“I don’t like roller coasters.” Zayn said. Liam’s enthusiasm deflated, and he threw his hands in the air in defeat. “They freak me out.” Zayn says and watches with a little guilt as Liam walked over to the other boys to get in line for the roller coaster.

The other four get on the roller coaster on their own, and the seating is separated in groups of four, which is perfect for them. They scoot in together, sit down and fasten the pink body harnesses over their torsos. Louis pulls his green jumper over his hands and grabs the pink plush in excitement. “Here we go lads.” He calls to excited.

On his side, he can see Harry grab the small metal-handles attached to the pink, his knuckles are going a bit white. Niall is giving him a small shove and Harry smiles at him, tentatively. “Are you alright man? Feeling good?” Liam asks.

“I’m not a massive roller coaster guy, if I’m being honest.” Harry says while the seats start moving up a small trail.

“No?” Liam sounds surprised. 

“I’ll hold yer hand.” Louis supplies. Harry turns his face to look at Louis and nods a bit, as if he were agreeing he’ll need that soon. The roller coaster suddenly turns on itself, so they hang upside down while gaining speed falling down the trail. Harry is making an o face, before he laughs and bites his plush lip. The roller coaster goes up again and turns on its heel so their upright again. 

Louis can hear Harry take a massive breath. But there is no rest for the wicked, as they gained some speed now, and the wind starts whipping at their hair. Niall by now looks like a hedgehog, and Louis can feel his own hair go up like a terrible form of a blow dry. The pressure of the wind presses down the skin on his face, and he can’t do anything apart from the smile. His jumper whips at his arms, and he can feel them going numb. He’s laughing in delight as they get swirled around their own heads again. Harry lets out a short scream, and Louis can hear Niall’s avalanching gurgle of a laugh.

Harry’s small whine reaches Louis ear “I hate roller coasters.” Louis looks over, Harry is smiling but there is a form of distaste on his face. The seats start to slow down, and Louis grabs Harry’s large hand, cradling it in his as they slowly drift into the barn. 

“How’s me hair?” Louis asks Harry, but he only lets out one of his chortled goat laughs.

“Are you crying Niall?” Liam asks, just as the seats stop. 

“No.” Niall sounds offended. Louis and Harry release each other’s hand as they jump off, this time Louis allows Harry to help his feet reach the floor unscathed. “HAHA… Tommo your hair.” Niall laughs. Louis quickly reaches his hand up to his hair and realises how hedgehog-y he looks. He tries to flatten it by hitting his head with his sweaty hand. 

“Leave him alone.” Harry giggles. His locks are still held down by gravity, Niall looks alright as well and Liam looks just as usual.

“How much hair gel do ye use mate?” Louis asks, still hitting himself while they walk out of the roller coaster barn.

“Should have told me to bring it, that would really save you right now. You look like a hairy frog.” Louis pouts at Liam’s words. They find Zayn outside the barn, with popcorn and cotton candy. Harry eagerly grabs for the pink sugar, sucking the stickiness off of the pads of his fingers. Louis has to force himself to look away, his cock already piquing an interest.

“What next?” Niall chuckles.

They arrive back in the hostel just in time for lunch, so their presence hasn’t been missed too much. Harry carries some beer under his coat which he quickly delivers to the girls room. They are pretty full from all the food from the fair, but Louis feels guilty not eating the nice cook’s food, so he stuffs some salad in his mouth. This actually gains him some approving looks from Eleanor. She, of course, had no idea where he had been all day. 

The second part of lessons that day are filled with Ms Horlyck explaining the importance of a good life balance, and other topics Louis doesn’t focus on because he continues his game with Jade. At four the group is released, and Louis joins Jade in her room to drink their acquired beer.

Sooner than later, the other three boys find him there too. He’s sitting in between Eleanor’s legs, while Sophia paints her nail on his knee. He’s never felt less manly. Eleanor and Sophia were sharing a bathroom with Barbara, Perrie, and Jade. The other boys sit down with them, and Liam starts to play a game with Jade. After hearing of their plans, Zayn had vanished, he didn’t particularly like being in Perrie’s vicinity.

Harry is watching Louis leaning against Eleanor’s bony chest, while he shares a beer with Niall. “Let me paint your nails.” Perrie says to him.

“NO!” Harry crawls away from the girl. 

“Come on lad! Just embrace it.” Louis snickers.

“I don’t wanna.” Harry says, his hands in the air in a gesture to keep her away from him. 

Louis really doesn’t understand why not, he remembers Harry wearing nail polish before. Louis frees himself of the embrace and walks over to Harry. His arms circling around him, grabbing his hands. Perrie quickly applies the nail polish. “Do the whole hand love.“ Louis instructs, winking at Harry who looks terrified. 

“It’s glittery.” Harry says, there’s a bit of awe in them.

“Embrace it.” Louis smiles, his hands move away from his to tickle him under his nipples.

“AH…” Harry yelps and pulls his hands away to shrug Louis off. Louis moves away from him, Niall and Barbara have started snogging, and Eleanor pulls a face at the two. Naturally, Louis sits down next to Liam. Harry puts down his hands so that Perrie can paint his other hand.

“Alright for this game,” Jade says. “I need a sentence and then you add the numbers together of each word.” Louis has no idea what she is talking about.

”Painted nails make Harry beautiful.” Louis says, when Harry looks down at his nails. Louis gives him a cheeky smile. Jade starts scribbling. Liam shoves an elbow into his side, but Louis is getting great at ignoring it.

“I feel so much prettier,” Harry whispers into Louis ear as they lie in Louis bed again. Zayn and Liam have fallen asleep in Payne’s bed together. Niall is with Barbara again, leaving Harry and Louis to be the only ones awake in the room. The darkness has made Harry softer.

“I know, love.” Louis says, his hand playing with Harry’s curls. He can’t describe the feeling that comes over him when his fingers get to tangle in the taller boy’s hair. It’s like his heart shivers from brushing apart the knots created by the locks of hair. “But just if ye want, Barbara gave me some nail polish remover, in case ye don’t want no one seein' it.” 

“Cheers.” Harry says, still watching the light crack from glitter on his nails. Louis sneaks his nose into Harry’s jaw and kisses along his neck. Harry hums. Louis bites at his jaw, which he knows Harry goes wild from. Harry rolls over, so Louis is under him again. Their lips slot together, while Louis’ hand pulls on his hair again. Their tongues slide into a hug carefully, and Louis can feel himself go hazy from Harry’s taste. Harry rubs his hand over Louis tummy, and Louis pushes his hand away again. Harry sighs when they detach. “You’re still not allowing me this?” Harry asks, poking Louis tummy. Louis self-consciously sucks in his tummy again, though, Harry can’t see because his tummy is tucked under his blanket.

“Just don’t…” Louis says, unable to explain himself.

Harry sighs one more time, hoisting himself up a bit, so his arms are straddling Louis torso. “The more curvy you are the more…” 

Louis covers Harry’s lips with his hand. “Shush. Can’t we just kiss?” 

“But I want you to know how precious you are!” Harry says with so much sincerity it makes Louis heart swell. _I really need to have a word with that thing. It’s not suppose to swell nor flutter or any other bullshit!_

“Oh Harry.” He sings, and slides his hand into Harry’s curls again to pull his mouth back on top of his own. A bit of convincing movements against the boys lips, Harry finally continues snogging Louis. Harry is not the only one who got soft from the darkness surrounding them. It’s like the night shifted them into perspective, shifted them to allow each other to see the person they could be for each other. _This feels right_. _This feels good._ His hand slips past Louis tummy this time to rub over Louis’ straining cock. Louis moans into Harry’s mouth, while their tongues fuck each other. Harry is moaning too, but he stops altogether with a sudden urge. Louis whines, “what are ye doin’?” 

“Revenge.” Harry whispers. He turns on his side, and Louis leans over him, so his chest aligns with Harry’s back. 

“For wha’ darlin’?” Louis whispers into his red ear.

“The picnic. You left me high and dry, so here’s my small revenge.” Harry chuckles to himself and if Louis wasn’t too annoyed with his raging hard on, he’d actually be impressed by him. 

He grumbles and hugs the tall boy from behind. He’s sure his hard cock is poking into the crown of Harry’s bum. Louis kisses his shoulder before trying to fall asleep. “Night Hazzy.”

Louis almost asleep when Harry mocks “night, Lou bear.” 

💚🍑💙

Liam wakes up from some noise coming from the other bed. He soon figured it was the indistinct sounds of moaning. He slowly open his eyes, Louis is perched over Harry, kissing his chest and bunching his t-shirt up to his armpits. Harry is the one moaning, his face blank in pleasure while Louis sucks on his right nipple. “You have to stop.” Harry says, sternly, pushing his arms down, to apply pressure on Louis’ shoulders. He’s unsuccessful, since Louis’ hand is still holding Harry down at his collarbone. 

“Be a good boy and don’t move.” Louis says. Harry’s fingers have a hard grip on Louis’ shoulders.

“Lou….” He whines, “we’ll wake the others.” His face depicts the struggle, staying strong towards Louis, while he could give into his submissive side to gain the pleasure he desperately needs.

Louis sits up, “you’re the worst submissive ever. Imagined ye differently, love.” Louis’ mind supplies him with images of fake-Harry in Ibiza, how submissively he had let Louis take him. Back then he thought that was exactly how Harry would be like, but he should have known Harry was a struggler as well as a submissive. Louis bends forward and kisses Harry on the mouth, he mumbles “stop thrashing” against his lips, almost inaudible to Liam still watching. 

Louis makes quick work of Harry’s t-shirt, pulling it up his arms. Unlike his words, Harry lets it happen, bucking up his hips. “Bad boy.” Louis whispers and surprises Harry by tying his wrists to the headboard. Liam can feel his own morning wood strain against his pyjama pants. 

Liam looks up in time to see Louis admiring his handiwork “that’s better.” Harry is whining something, but Louis seems to ignore his discomfort in order to spread Harry’s thighs like a butterfly. “I love that you sleep naked.” Harry is biting his lower lip staring at Louis with hooded eyes. His decision has just been made for him. Louis’ hands travel down his sides, gives his love handles a squeeze and pats his thighs. Louis grins “ye want me to stop touching ye? I can do tha’.” 

“No, no, no… Lou, please.” Harry squeezes out. “Don’t leave me like this.” Liam can’t see his cock, but he can see Harry’s breathing. His stomach frantically going up and down from the panic Louis could leave him like this. Louis stands up between Harry’s spread legs, prompting another wave of “please Lou” and ‘“I’ll stop resisting, I promise.” Louis shimmers his briefs down his thick thighs, Liam keeps his eyes on Harry, he has not interest seeing Louis naked. Well, to be honest he might have seen him naked in the shower once or twice during footie. He doesn’t need a reminder. Louis falls back between Harry’s thighs and scrambles his briefs in his hand. “I’ll do anything you want.” 

“Shut it,” Louis pushes his briefs into Harry’s mouth. His eyes bulge when he tastes the texture, his lips stretching around the fabric. “It was ye who was afraid of others wakin’ up.” Louis starts touching Harry’s cock, tentatively rubbing the vein on the underside of his dick with his thumb. All Liam can see are Harry’s eyes closing, and his six-pack twitching.

Liam can feel Zayn’s breathing against his neck in small puffs, goosebumps travel through his body, and he has to close his eyes to come to terms with the arousal shooting through him. He feels the same interest that peeked when he was sitting opposite Danielle for the first time, when he could barely see her breasts peeking out of her décolleté. He remembers being so fucking aroused.

Harry’s twisting underneath Louis, his wrists pulling at the restraint of his t-shirt. Louis is snickering watching Harry undergo his ministration.

Liam can feel a hand laying over his waist, Zayn snuggling closer. Something pokes him in the back, and Liam holds in a moan. _How great would it feel if Zayn just took a hold of him now_.

“I’m not going to suck yer cock, ye haven’t deserved that today baby.” Louis whispers into Harry’s ear, his hands are bracing at Harry’s sides and is hovering over him. Louis lowers himself and slotting their cocks against each other. “I think this is enough for ye, ain’t it?” Harry bends his knees and bucks up into Louis, moaning between the fabric. Louis starts sucking on Harry’s jaw, while the latter gurgles groans into his pacifier. 

Louis starts humping him without mercy, his ass jiggles from the pushes. “I’m going to come, are ye, baby?” Louis moans. Liam can hear both boys moan in quick suggestion, Louis slums on top of a harsh breathing Harry. He moves to kiss Harry’s nose and pries at the cloth out of his mouth. Liam groans and turns around, he can’t stand it any more, looking at the two of them. He doesn’t want to see the sex haze reflected on their faces.

Once settled on the other side, he realises how close his boner is to Zayn’s crotch. He looks up and is met with brown eyes staring at him. Fingertips are cradling his lower back, Zayn is grinning mischievously. “You alright?” Zayn says. 

“Shit.” Liam squirms and falls off the bed. There’s a surprise yelp from the other bed, but Liam is busy rushing to the bathroom. The door clicks locked. “Fuck,” Liam scolds himself thumbing his head against the wall. “What was that?” 

“Good morning,” Zayn says looking at Louis and Harry. As soon as Liam had fallen off of his own bed, Louis had pushed the blanket over his and Harry’s body. Harry’s head was red from embarrassment, and he was ripping against the seam of his shirt.

“Stop, ye’ll rip it.” Louis says.

“Alright, you help Harry. I’ll help Liam.” Zayn starts moving around on the bed. 

“I doubt he wants yer help with that.” Louis says, while he scurries up Harry’s body again. His soft cock dangles between his stretched legs. He’s still straddling Harry’s body ,and the tip of his cock is touching Harry’s nipple. Harry looks annoyed, but he’s also biting his bottom lip when their eyes lock. Louis winks at him, making him blush. Harry everts his eyes and looks at the wall. Louis scoffs, _keep pretending that you aren’t insatiable._ He slowly loosens the tie around his hands, and Harry retracts them down his body, getting a warm tingling back into his arms. His hands, for the lack of better placement, land on Louis thighs. 

“Liam, open up!” Zayn is standing outside their bathroom and drumming against the door. 

“Move, Louis.” Harry demands. 

“I actually like your hands on me, sugarplum.” Harry lifts him at his waist with his own strength and throws him next to him. Louis groans. “Glad you enjoyed that too.” 

“Can’t believe this happened again.” Harry is talking to himself, in a low tone while he slips out of the bed. He starts looking for some cloths. He clutches them against his impressive length, while he hurries over to Zayn, who is giving him a once-over. 

“Liam open up, I need a shower and a change.” Harry drums his hand against the bathroom door.

“Go away.” 

“Jesus Liam, it’s just morning wood, let me in or So help me GOD!” Harry’s head is completely red now. If he’s furious with himself or Liam, Louis can’t tell. But he does not seem to appreciate Zayn’s eyes on his front, nor Louis eyes on his perky behind. 

The door creeps open, “you’re scary.” 

“Thank you,” Harry says, polite as ever. He squeezes in next to Liam. Louis’ head falls back against the pillow. 

“You okay Li?” Louis can hear the grin in Zayn’s voice. 

“Yeah, yeah… just you know… the usual problems in the morning.” Liam stutters out.

“Right!” Zayn chuckles, before the door closes on him. Zayn sits back down on his bed. “Why did I not know about you and Harry?”

“Because ye were always too high t’ notice any of it.” Louis says solemn, staring at the bunk-bed above him. 

“Sorry.”

Louis shrugs, with his hands behind his head. “Not like he wants to be together, so no harm done.” It pains him to know the truth behind the statement. Louis adds, “And I thought you’d never figure it out.” The relieving feeling of having Harry beneath him and his ball’s tightening orgasm slowly drifting away in favour of irritation taking its place. “Don’t tell a soul!” 

When Louis finally gets his turn in the bathroom, it smells like nail polish remover, which is the second worst smell next to actual nail polish. At breakfast he realises Harry has removed the colour from his nails. They get reminded again about the Tipi adventure this night. Louis can hardly believe that this is already the penultimate day. The bonfire night at the Tipi’s will be his last chance to be close to Harry and turn him to his side, before this trip ends.

💚🍑💙

“And where am I going to sleep then?” Louis asks, looking around. Liam scoffs next to him. The entire 10-persons-Tipi is empty, but cots next to Harry is taken by Niall and Liam. Louis stands in front of the cot next to Liam and Zayn, he’s still frowning. When Louis had gone up to his room during lunch to pack, Harry had ignored him and frowned the entire time. Louis had continuously worried about this. The drive to the Tipi tents had been too loud for Louis’ anxiously hammering heart. 

“Here.” Liam says, moving his baggage one cot over to Louis’. “We can switch.” Louis beams at Liam and moves over next to Harry. Liam and Zayn stuff their bags under their cots and leave the tent to explore. Louis sits down on his own bed and watches Harry prepare his small sleeping space. Delicately he places a pyjama underneath his pillow and readjusts the blanket.

“Are ye unhappy with me?” Louis asks him. Harry shrugs, but the muscles in his back are tense. “H!” Louis says sternly, Harry turns around to him, but his eyes are dark with anger. “I really enjoyed this mornin’.” 

Harry whispers, “can’t happen again.” 

Louis rolls his eyes and stands to sit down on Harry’s cot, smiling up at the irritated face. “Why not, love?” He leans up on his knees to give Harry a kiss to the lips. Niall awkwardly clears his throat from the other side of Harry’s cot. Harry didn’t kiss back, Louis falls back on his bum. Harry still looks irritated and angry. 

“We have to stop having sex, Louis.” Harry says, rubbing a hand through his curls.

“Ehm… we’re not having sex, though.” Louis says irritated. He’d argue they are getting each other off, that’s not sex. The key element of penetration missing, not that Louis wouldn’t die to feel Harry around him. 

“Asshole.” Harry says, throwing his toiletries on the bed next to Louis and storming out of the room. 

“You’re such an idiot.” Niall face-palms himself.

“What?” Louis says, “I don’t understand.” But Niall just keeps shaking his head, heading for the entrance of the Tipi himself. “What?” Louis calls, throwing his hands in the air in defeat. _The fock is happenin’?_

Louis walks on to the clearing, inside the national park, overlooking the water. Ten Tipi-tents were standing in a circle with a large bonfire-place in the middle. Niall was holding a guitar and promising a few girls he’d play and sing during the night. The teachers were trying to organise something, while Louis accidentally walked into a group of people playing football. Seeing Liam as the master planner of this, he joins them.

Half an hour later, Louis fouled Taylor, who was a terrible defender. Ashton was talking at the edge of the makeshift pitch. “I’m stuck in Tipi with a gay boy,” his body shivers as if the revulsion was cutting through his body. 

“You complain about a poof… we got two lesbians in our tent.” Alana says, her face pulled into a face. “Honestly, at least your gay boy doesn’t have anyone to snog.” Louis can feel his blood boiling, how dare they talk about his Harry that way?

“That’s something to celebrate.” Calum makes every boy laugh, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

“Could sell tickets.” Ashton laughs.

“EW. It’s…” Alana starts up again.

But she is interrupted by Jade, “careful Alana, it’ll be dark tonight, every girl will look the same. Might get confused and fuck you with my big bad strap on by mistake.”

Alana’s face has gone white, and Louis snickers into his hand, when Jade joins him. “You’re a cunt, Tomlinson.” Taylor spits at him, there are green flecks from the grass on her white top. “Least you could have do is to help me up.” 

Louis rolls his eyes at her, “it’s a good thing you only dance on the sidelines, darlin’.” Jade shoves him hard, making him fall to the side, she chases him for a while. Until Louis stops, and she full on collides with him, causing both their bodies to fall on top of each other. “Wha’ was that for?” 

“Be nicer to her.” Jade giggles.

“Ye can’t stand her either.” Louis mumbles into the crook of Jade’s elbow. 

“EVERYONE GATHER AROUND, please.” Ms. Horlyck screams through the place, and Louis helps Jade up. She grins when she tries to brush the dirt off of her jeans. “So, tonight, we are in charge of feeding ourselves. The hostel left us with some hot dogs and hamburger meat that we can cook over a fire, they also supplied us with salads and something very American smores.” She smiles into the round. 

“We don’t have American’s in sixth form.” Eleanor says. 

“So? It’s supposed to be fun.” Ms. Horlyck growls to the brunette. “Anyway. I need some people to get fire wood, some to make the salads and some to prepare the meat.” She divides everyone into groups. 

Louis stumbles through the darkening woods, trying to find good firewood. He’s not the best at this camping thing, he’s usually the guy who just pretends to do something rather than actually doing something. Louis frustratingly pulls on a long stick and adds it to the ones he gathered on his arm like a baby. There’s a pain in Louis’ back, had to be something that hit him in the back. “Oops.” A deep voice says.

“Hi.” Louis grins when he turns to stare at Harry, who had stepped on uneven ground behind Louis, a stick was pushed upward and poked Louis demandingly on the back. “Just move, Harold.” Louis teases, and Harry quickly steps aside, the stick falls back down. “They choose ye to get fire wood? Bambi in the woods, how cute.” Harry grabs a stick out of his own arm and forcefully pushes it into Louis tummy. “Owa, t’ fock?”

“You’re being mean.” Harry says.

“Bambi is a term of endearment.” Louis smiles at the taller boy, to be fair, they are standing on a bit of a trail upwards, so Louis feels almost as tall as him.

Harry just shakes his head and walks off to a fallen tree further up. Louis walks after him. “What are you doing?” Harry asks, irritated. Louis’ hand snatch up to place them on Harry’s love handles. Even if Harry thinks they are the most annoying trait of his own, Louis loves the little pudges he imagines holding onto while he fucks into the younger boy. Harry slaps his hand away with a rather hurtful branch. “I asked, what are you doing?” He says rough, the crudeness in the voice makes Louis stumble a bit. They’re still standing on a slant. His legs buckle a bit and falls backwards. He’s only saved by a tree hitting him in the back on his way down. He moans from the pain snapping through his spine and cradles the branches harder against his chest.

“Just tryin’ to be closer to ye.” Louis mumbles. 

“Why?” Harry asks, his feet incredibly steady as he navigates the way toward Louis. He can see the fire in the green eyes, the anger Louis caused him. Bambi is gone. His blue eyes fall down to the twigs in his arm. “We’re not having sex, so why instigate it?” Harry’s voice is mocking.

“We only get each other off, we don’t really have sex. There’s no penetration.” Louis whispers.

Harry’s green eyes have gone impossibly wide with realisation. He throws his hands in the air, the twigs and branches scattering around them like rain. “Of fucking course, you are one of those people. Sex isn’t about penetration Louis, can’t believe I have to be the one to tell you this!” Harry is standing right in front of him now, and Louis can smell the chewing gum on his breath. “Dry humping, you know, the thing we did this morning, is very much considered having sex.”

“Why does it matter so much to ye?” Louis asks, sneaking a small peak at the frown on Harry’s pink lips.

Harry runs his hand through his hair, exhausted he finally says “it’s the closest I have ever gotten to it. So yeah, it’s sex. And that’s something very intimate for me. And I don’t want to be the itch you’re scratching.” 

“Sadly, actually, I ‘aven’t had sex in a while.” Embarrassment flushing through Louis. He can feel his cheeks heat up a bit.

“Oh.” Is the only sound Harry makes. “What about El?” He asks.

“Not since the end of last term.” Louis says, earnestly. “ ‘ave been abstinent since Ibiza.” He chances a look at Harry. He’s still leaning over the smaller boy, his nostrils have stopped flaring, but he still couldn’t read him. _Usually, he’s an open book, not today._

“Hmm.” Harry rumbles. They stare at each other for a few beats, Louis tries to give him a small smile, Harry’s eyes get stuck on the movement. He gulps. But then his eyebrows knit together, and Louis knows this means he’s thinking. He mumbles, “Oh… wait a minute…” His eyes lift back into the hopeful baby blue, and he asks “since when did you say you were abstinent?”

Louis’ small voice readjusts to his own confusion, “Ibiza why…?”

Harry closes his eyes and his jaw sets into his angry front again. “You’re lying…” He says, his nostrils flare again. 

“What? No.” Louis says as fast as he can. _I’m not lying!_ He wishes he could reach out to him, run his hand over Harry’s strong tummy. Feel the power the boy holds beneath Louis’ own palm, let the bravery flow into his skin like the heat he knows would seep through.

“I know you have been sleeping around in Ibiza.” Harry continues, ignoring the pleading in Louis’ tone. Louis swallows, _how does he know anything about Ibiza? Who rated? Liam? Unlikely. Jade? Even less likely. Perrie? Maybe. Zayn? Probably not. The Dony-boys don’t even know Harry, so definitely not them. “_ Your silence is deafening, Louis.” Harry’s angry voice cuts him out of his deliberations.“You fucked around in Ibiza I know that.“

“I said since Ibiza, as in after, as in since a week before me mom’s wedding.” Louis deflects. He sees Harry crossing his muscly arms over his chest, “how do ye even kna any tha’?”

Harry’s eyes roam over Louis’ face, trying to understand what is going through his head. “Zayn told me.”

Louis’ heart drops again. Pummels into his socks and dies there, a silent death. Well not so silent because there’s a small squealy-dying-animal sound coming out of his mouth, suppressed by the little air he has in his lungs. Images flash through his mind, Harry’s lips surrounding Zayn’s earlobe and letting it go. The two of them dancing together at one of the parties last month. “That why ‘e was all over ye at our last parties? He lubin’ ye up with lies?” Louis asks, he wishes his voice were as strong as Harry’s when he’s upset. Right now he feels like a chipmunk for some reason, small, red but overlooked.

Harry shakes his head, like he can’t believe him. “He told me about the boy who sucked your cock in his car and your Donny friend in your bed…” 

Louis stares back down at his hands, cradling the branches to his non-existing heart. He wills down the tears of embarrassment and betrayal. _How could Zayn betray me like that?_ _What is his game?_ His voice wobbles when he finally stops Harry’s rant about his Ibizan conquests. _“_ Harry there is only you, all the time when I was with someone this summer all I could think about, get hard for, come from is thinkin’ of ye.”

Of course Harry doesn’t really listen, because he starts taunting Louis “you fucked other boys. It’s pretty obvious your gay now mate.”

Louis quickly looks up “I know I’m queer. But I’m not goin’ t’ proclaim tha’ to the entire footie field, do ye have any idea what they would do t’ me? And I thought I knew ye well enough t’ kna ye wouldn’t deal with it like this.”

“That’s not the point.” Harry says angry. He might be a little angry with himself, he never treated people like this when they were coming out, it wasn’t his place. “The point is you have been sleeping around, and I know the truth.” He tries to re-establish his position.

“Why does tha’ matter?” Louis finally asks.

Harry uncrosses his arms from his chest, and he fixes Louis with the saddest expression, _one which should never break on such a beautiful face_. _Such a cute face, he deserves all the happiness in the world!_ Harry breathes in tightly before he pours out his heart. “Because you told me to wait and I did. I waited for you to come home and ask me out. I waited while you were fucking around in Ibiza. I passed offers from other blokes, because I thought maybe, just maybe, HE will come back to me. Maybe I’m a romantic, but I thought I’d regret it if some other nameless-faceless lad gave me one of my firsts if they could be with you. I waited and when you came back you were with her again and I crumbled. Because you made your choice.” Harry takes another whistling-tight breath. “Alright! I’m not standing in the way of someone making their own choice, even if they are to push me away. But then you came to me and you said all those sweet things and I wanted you to touch me again, and I want you too. I can’t stop you even though I know you’re not here to stay. And I let you have me, because it feels so good to be touched by the one I —-…” Harry gulps harshly, shakes his head like there is something he can’t have Louis know, “but you don’t even think its sex. You don’t even think it’s something important. It’s something to put a name to. Because that makes it easier for you to walk away again. And I can’t… I just can’t handle you walking away again, so I’m stoping this. Whatever you deem to call this. Because my heart can’t handle any more. It’s time I look after my own heart.” Harry bends forward to grab at the branches he had thrown about and walks a couple of steps away.

“I will miss you.” Louis calls after him. The deja-vu flashes him. What was it? Four months ago, where Louis told Harry he’d be going on holiday to clear his head, and Harry had whispered he’d miss him. The same need flushes him now, the same desperation Harry must have felt at that exact moment. _How did I lose this much power over so little time? How did we switch places?_ “And I will not stop wooing ye until ye give in to us.”

“Do us both a favour and stop. I’m tired of waiting for you to answer if it could be possible for you to fall in love with me one day.” Harry says and starts walking back to camp.

_Could fall for you? I think I already have!_ Louis slides down the tree, ugly sobs rumble through him, and he stuffs his face into the twigs. They brush against his cheeks and cut into his skin. Louis doesn’t notice, it feels nice to have some sort of pain rip through the one of his heartbreaking, Again.

Louis stumbles back to camp, it’s gone quite dark and Louis is simply glad he’s found the Tipi’s again. He throws some sticks onto the pile, when Calum approaches him. “Tommo! You got a minute. There’s this huge log we need to build the fire.” 

Louis turns around to him, he’s got no idea how red his eyes are, how wild his fringe looks, or how cut up his face is, but Calum looks surprised. “Sure, where is it?”

“Right over here.” They stumble back between the trees. He’s right, the log looks more like a mediocre tree which fell in a particularly violent storm. 

“Ain’t it too big? Are ye sure it’ll burn?” Louis asks.

Calum shrugs and goes to one of the ends. Louis takes the other end, and they lift after counting to four, _because everyone counts to three, where is the fun in that? “_ Are you alright, mate?” Calum is watching his face, while Louis stumbles backwards to the fire-sight. 

“Yeah, got some bad news is all.” Louis answers. They threw the log next to the bonfire. Ashton and Clifford are working with Liam to build the bonfire. “Nah, Nah, boys, got t’ do it the Tommo way.” Louis approaches them and pulls on some logs and they shift dangerously and fall together like a house of cards.

“TOMMO!” Calum and Liam exclaimed in unison.

“Woops.” Louis giggles. “Well get back to it, men.” 

“Cunt.” Ashton mumbles under his breath, but Louis can see a small smile. He’s probably just high on the feeling of getting under Liam’s skin. _‘cause everyone likes to do that_. Louis smirks at him too, while he takes a seat in one of the chairs.

The next hour he watches Liam and Ms. Horlyck coach the boys to build the bonfire. “Are you okay?” Zayn asks next to him. 

“Get me a beer.” Louis answers him. Zayn looks irritated, but gets up to find a beer for him. When he returns, Louis is pleasantly surprised to find it exuding condensation water, which is nicely coolish. He takes a swig and looks down at Zayn, who is perched on a log next to Louis seat. “I kind of considered ye me best mate.” Louis says. Zayn gives him a genuine smile. “But yer dead to me.” Louis says, his anger filling the air. Jade who was standing by Liam to hold a match for him turns to look at him.

“Why?” Zayn asks, the blood rushing out of his face.

“Ye told on me. Ye rat!” Louis whispers shouts into his face, a small droplet of spit lands on Zayn’s nose.

“I’d never!” Zayn sits up more, and brushes the spit from his face.

“Ye think I wouldn’t find out the things ye say about me? The lies ye fill into Curly’s head?” Louis spits some more, Zayn evades the droplets this time.

“To be fair, I had no idea you were keen on him until this morning.” Zayn defended himself in a low whisper. Jade was moving around the bonfire and stood only two feet away from her.

“Ye kna tha’ makes it worse, right? Anything tha’ happened in Ibiza, was meant to stay in Ibiza. Ye weren’t supposed to blabber yer mouth about me to ANYONE!” Louis growls. “Get the fock out of me face, lad!” Louis turns away from Zayn and stares at Jade, who is doing a terrible job at pretending to be uninterested by their conversation. Zayn staggers onto buckling legs and walks over to Liam, whispering to him.

Jade plops herself down in Zayn’s seat. “How’d you know it was him?”

“Harry told me himself.” Louis says. Jade twirls one of her curls around her index finger, considering what to say next. 

“Is he mad at you now?” Jade asks.

“Yeah.” Louis says, taking another gulp of the disguised beer in his tea thermos. Louis rubs his eyes with his finger pads. Jade stands up and folds herself into Louis lap. She’s smaller than Louis and it’s comforting to have a smaller body curl on top of him. He brushes her hair, and closes his eyes, pretending his hands are tangle in a brown mess.

Louis watches the flames dance around the log he and Calum carried over. Louis was right, for once, the log does not catch flame. It’s simply too big. Liam and Eleanor try to take his mind off of things. But nothing stays in his brain for too long. He’s just thankful El’s friends aren’t around.

Niall is strumming his guitar, and Harry’s delicate voice surrounds the bonfire while Louis turns to Eleanor. “Ye can’t kiss me no more.” 

She turns to star at him with a rather daft expression. “What do you mean?” 

“I don’t want ye to kiss me no more.” Louis says it again. “I’m gay, Eleanor, it’s pretty fucking unfortunate.” Louis says into her triangle shaped face. Louis can feel himself been, it’s the first time he said Gay, not Queer. He can feel the light headedness teeth through him, the weight is gone. He feels like he’s on drugs. 

“O-kay.” Eleanor slowly says. “But I’m still your girlfriend, I do have to kiss you to make it believable.” 

“People don’t care if we kiss, El. They believe the lie, even if the truth is dangling in front of them like a chicken in front of a hound.” Louis says, every word makes him more light-headed. _Who the fuck uses drugs_? _This is so much better_! “I get it now.” He says, and El is staring at him as if he lost his mind. “If I want him, and I do, I got to show him it’s only him. So I ‘ave to stop fockin’ around, especially with ye.” Eleanor still looks sceptical. “What about Max? He can’t find it great what we’re doin’ ‘ere?” 

“I guess so.” Eleanor smiles a bit, though, she still thinks he lost his mind. She pats his cheek and chuckles. “Fine. We’ll try it your way. But if one of these fuckers gives us grief about our non-PDA-ness, I will kiss you again.” Louis just shrugs and leans back with a giddy smile.

He catches Niall’s face across the fire and winks at him. Niall bares his teeth in a loud laugh, while Barbara leans against his side. Harry and Taylor are leaning into each other, as they have a heated discussion about something. Louis’ stops his urge to hack of her fingers, when Taylor’s fingers travel across Harry’s thigh. 

Louis’ eyes trail the movement. “Hey,” Niall startles Louis. He had stood up and walked over to Louis. He’s kicking at Louis’ outstretched feet. “Let’s get some food.” He says anticlimactically. He nods and the two walk over to the small bar, where Louis makes himself one burger, and Niall gathers himself food for two people at least. _Cheryl_ gives him a warning glare.

Louis sits back down on his seat. Niall sits down next to him, where he left his guitar. Barbara is curling herself into his side, picking at a loaf he brought over with him. Amusingly, Niall looks like he could kill her. “Don’t fuck with his food.” Louis tells her, while stuffing his own burger into his mouth.

“Believe me I know. Dating an Irish is literally all about food and beer.” She says fondly. Louis grunts a laugh at her.

“I thought there’d be some sex in there too.” Louis gulps down his burger with a flush of beer.

“Have you met him?” She’s giggling, and Niall pouts aggressively.

“Get your own bloody food.” Niall swivels away from her, so his plate is swimming underneath Louis’ jaw. Louis laughs, while Barbara stands up and pushes her tongue out of her mouth. She stalks off to the bar, while Harry strides past her. He lost Taylor and slowly approaches them. He takes a seat next to Liam. Jade bites into a burger, and Harry stares down at his own paper plate shuffled up with salad. He says something to Jade.

To their left, Calum, Michael and Luke start singing, since Niall stopped strumming his guitar to eat. Their song, though, is less than ideal. “Ashton’s my best friend, take it till the very end… O love this guy…so very much…” Luke bellows across the clearing.

Calum joins him “hello my best friend, till the very end. Ashton is a shit guy… I’lI hate him so fucking much till the very end.”

“Your not turning vegetarian are you?” Jade asks Harry, eyes large from shock. 

“No!” Harry shakes his head, while he still stares at Jade’s hamburgers. “But your body is what you eat, you know? And your body is designed to heal itself. You have to feed it the right fuel.”

Louis rolls his eyes, but Liam takes Harry way too serious. “Just flush an avocado in there, am I right?” 

“Oh no Payno!” Louis shakes his head in faux-hatred. “Not them avocados.” 

“Why not?” Harry pouts. At least he’s not looking at Louis with hatred any more. Maybe he sees Louis cuts. Maybe he even saw Louis’ red eyes when he returned from the woods. Or he’s really moving on. ‘ _Just friends’ is clearly the worst invention in human history,_ Louis thinks begrudgingly. 

“The trendiest food of all times, innit?” Louis grumbles, “like if I have a fockin’ avocado I have to tag in me picture, like, you kna what I mean? They do piss me of!” 

“Why?” Liam grumbles, amusement stretching over his confused face.

“They’re nothin special, mate. And now everyone like pretending there’s something amazing, just because some cunt in LA is like tagging his toast shit.” 

“But avocados are really good for your body. You know they got…all these fats and vitamins…and minerals, also helps with better bowl movements.” Harry turns red when he feels the bemused eyes of his friends on him. “They also help with depression and cancer… I’m just going to stop talking now.” Harry finishes and shovels some cucumbers into his mouth. 

Louis’ heart flutters again. _How is he so cute, how can one person be this gorgeous while flushing_? But he looks embarrassed and Louis would do anything to make him feel comfortable again. “Thanks for the knowledge, Harold.” Louis calls over to him. Their eyes meet for a minute, but Harry just rubs his vinegar lips on the sleeve of his Green Bay Packers hoodie. Louis wishes he could kiss them again, like their second first kiss. Exhausted, he rubs his temples again. There’s just an onslaught of memories barging in his mind every minute of the day.

Louis helps Ms. Horlyck clean up, while most students rush to the Tipis. Liam and Ms. Cole are throwing water over the glistering coal. The female teachers send them off to their beds, and Liam sneaks an arm around Louis. They walk through the folds of the Tipi. A few candles and smartphones light the way to their cots. Liam gives him a kiss to the temple, “sleep tight, Tommo.”

“Ye too, Payno.” Louis mumbles, while his eyes rake over Harry’s form. He’s wearing soft-looking Abercrombie hot pants, he knows one of his sisters owns as well. Paired with a tight baby blue t-shirt with dark blue flowers which exposes his love handles, it’s like Harry knows those are his _favourite feature about him, besides the eyes and the dimples. Oh, and the curls, anyway getting distracted again_. Harry turns to him, and realises the look on Louis’ face. He quickly gets into bed, by which he almost topples over the cot. 

Louis rips the jeans off of his frame and climbs between his own blanket. It’s not warm enough, and he starts wiggling to get a little heat going. He can feel Harry’s eyes on him, _oh how nice it’ll be to grab his hoodie and sleep in his cosy scent all night._ Slowly the chatter dies down, the smartphones get put aside and the candles are blown out. Louis’ still shivers lightly, _fuck I even get cold when the window is open during a drive,_ which is why he stays awake for longer _._ His eyes are halfway closed when he hears the smack. His eyes bolt open, he’s still facing Harry, but the sound is coming from behind him. Someone is kissing. But there are only boys in the Tipi!

Louis fiddles out of the warmish hug around him, leans forward, places a hand on the floor, and gets his hand on Harry’s naked arm. He can feel him shiver. He pulls on the arm, thankfully he slithers down his cot as well. Their faces are mere millimetres away, hands almost touching, which they don’t notice for a while because it’s so bloody dark. “Someone is kissin’.” Louis whispers against Harry’s face. 

He waits for a beat, to let Harry’s ears find the noise. “Who do you think it is?” Harry’s minty toothpaste flushes over his face. 

“Me guess is as good as yers.” Louis whispers.

“This the reason for waking me?” Harry sounds like he wants to snicker, and Louis imagines his nose scrunching up like he’s about to sneeze. He knows it’s the way Harry shows his fondness.

“Yeah, thought ye’d like this stuff… come on Harold… don’t ye want t’ kna who else is gay?” Louis says, this is exciting. Again the night, shoves aside their differences. He can hear Harry’s suppressed giggle. Louis brushes their lips together by accident when their faces move closer to continue whispering. Harry pulls away. “Sorry.”

“I think we need to sleep.” Harry says, instead.

“Night Haz.” He whispers and retreats back into his cot. He can hear Harry shuffle too, and the kissing has stopped. _Who might they be?_ Something hits him in the head. Louis takes a breath, it’s Harry’s Packers hoodie. He gets his limbs through it and falls asleep much happier than before.

💚🍑💙

Breakfast consists of a bad soup, to which Louis loses his appetite the moment he is looking at it. Harry is on his phone talking to someone, _probably Nick_ , Louis thinks. Jealousy drives through him again, and Louis throws his soup inside the burned down bonfire pit. His eyes fallow Harry, who strides around the edge of the woods, kicking at grass once in a while. He seems nervous and that makes Louis mad. 

He packs his things together in anger and storms into the bus. Jade and Perrie already inside, kissing each other in the back seat. “Aw, stop that!” Louis throws something against Perrie’s head. 

“Find your own, then.” Perrie argues and goes back to pushing her hand under Jade’s shirt. 

Louis groans when he falls into a seat in front of them. Slowly the bus fills in, Liam falls into the seat next to them. Zayn is sitting on another bus Liam tells him. “I don’t want him around no more.” Louis says, his forehead pressed against the cold window, as the bus starts moving.

Liam shifts uncomfortable. “He’s our friend.”

“He betrayed me, Li.” He looks at Liam, eyes watery again. “Because of him, Harry thinks I’m a whore.” He sniffles.

“Harry would never think that of you.” Liam grabs the smaller boy. Louis pushes against him. He can’t. He doesn’t cry in the open, never has. It’s something for his private room, where no one can see or hear. He knows himself too much, if someone hugs him right now, he’ll lose it.

“He already does, Li.” Louis wipes his face with his jumper. “He told me he sleeps around too much, he knows about everything in Ibiza.” Liam’s hand on his shoulder falters. 

“What? How?” Liam’s face goes white. “Zayn! God, Louis, I’m sorry I had no idea.”

“Not your fault,” Louis mumbles into his sleeve.

“Oh God I’m so stupid.” Liam mumbles.

“What are you on about?” Louis shifts to focus on Liam.

“Nothing.” Liam is stunted into silence while he thinks. 

“Liam?” Louis sniffles, _so I might be a bit needy_! 

“Harry doesn’t think you’re a whore or a bad person, trust me. The way he looks at you, it’s like the sun shines out of your arse or you hung the moon or something poetic like that.” 

“He told me he doesn’t want me advances no more, ‘cause I fuck around too much, and he ain’t me residential gay fuck I can pick up.” Louis doesn’t realise how much embellishes the truth, _but that’s what Harry said, innit_?

“I think we need an action plan, Lou.” Liam says. He pretends to roll up his sleeve and gathers a piece of paper and pen. “Tell me how you’re going to win him over.” He clicks the pen and the nib shoots out of the barrel. He raises his eyebrow to make Louis talk. 

“I’ve already tried that remember?” Louis argues. He sits up a bit to look over the heads. He sees the chestnut curls slanted to the side to talk into his phone.

“You tried, exactly. It’s time we actually build a plan here. We have a plan it’ll work.” Liam says.

“I don’t believe in tha’.” Louis mumbles.

“Louis, you tried it your way by wining it. Didn’t work. Let’s try it my way. We’re making a plan. We have two hours ‘till were home, plenty of time for a master plan.” Liam grins mischievously. Or maybe he’s just excited to make Louis’ conquest of Harry into a term paper. Louis moans and starts talking.

Louis can see the twins, bundled up in pink winter-jackets, while they jump up and down waving at all the buses. Louis’ cheeks hurt from the smile he gives them. Louis walks out with a beam, the ‘Conquer-Harry-Plan’ neatly tucked into his pocket. The twins fall into his arms, and he kisses their blonde heads lovingly. The smell of the raspberry shampoo reaches him. They smell like home. He pulls on their cheeks, while they make weird sounds whistling the air from the inside of their cheeks. They giggle when Louis stands back up to give his mother a kiss on the cheek. “Hey mom.”

“Oh my boo bear.” She looks like she’s about to shed some tears. 

“Mom, don’t embarrass me, please.” He whispers to her forehead, which he kisses. Louis realises her cheeks have gone a little chubbier. He finds her softer than before, her eyes sparkling while she pats his cheek. “I’ll get me bag.” He shuffles out of the girls hold and quickly walks around the bus to get to the boot.

Someone stumbles against Louis, and the duffel falls to the ground. “Damn it!” Harry mumbles and gathers his things to get going again.

“Why are ye in such a bad mood?” Louis asks, rubbing his shoulder. Harry passes him, “Nick break up with ye or what?” 

“Why Nick?” Harry turns back around to him, his hand holding the strap of his duffle tightly which is swung over his shoulder. “Why’d you think that?” They are standing about three steps away from each other.

“Ye were phonin’ 'im the entire drive home!” Louis accuses him, and he knows he sounds childish.

“I was talking to my dad.” Harry takes a deep breath, “My grandma fell down some stairs. She’s in the hospital. We don’t know what’shappening yet.”

Louis swallows around the lump in his throat. “Shit.” Harry starts walking towards a car, where Gemma is perched over the roof, honking vigorously. “I’m sorry Harreh!” He scrams over the lot. Harry waves at him, when he gets into his car. _Does that mean forget about it or does it mean fuck you_?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading 💋  
> If you enjoyed please klick the kudos button, and if you want to show me more love leave me a comment ♥
> 
> Some canon/explanatory notes…  
> 1\. Harry really doesn't like roller coaster rides (see one direction roller coaster quiz)  
> 2\. Louis famously hates avocados (see googlebox)  
> 3\. Madame Horlyck (the art teacher in this story) was one direction's vocal coach


	8. For You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another Chapter...
> 
> It's a little longer than usual, I hop you enjoy!
> 
> (Trigger Warning: mention of possible eating disorder, curse language, smut, angst, homophobia, mention of bullying, provocative language towards abortion.)

“I know how much you hate me saying this, but you got to calm down Lou!” 

“Fock off, Payno. Ye didn’t see ‘is face! He hated me. His pour grandma and I thought it was Nick.” Louis facepalms himself.

“That was a bit dickish.” Liam’s voice filters through the receiver. Louis whines and falls in on himself. He sags down on to his bed, and grabs his pillow and hugs it. He borrows his neck into the dark blue pillow casing.

“Not helpin’!” Louis says into the pillow.

“Don't know what you said, but here is my plan.” There is ruffling through the phone, while Liam sits up determined. “We’re moving the ‘Get-Harry-Masterplan’ a little a head.”

“What do ye mean?” Louis asks, still somewhat muffled by the pillow, though he frees his face from the pillow to probably breathe. His left cheek feels nice and squishy.

“You know the part where you were going to send flowers to Haz?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, tomorrow you’re going to get some flowers for him and bring them over to his house, to see how he and his grandmother is doing.”

“Ye think that’s a good idea?” Louis mumbles into the phone.

“Yes!” Liam scoffs. “Harry loves flowers, he’s like the portrait of a real live romcom. His knees will go….” There is commotion and Liam accuses the intruder “mum! Get out! Give me a minute… I don’t have anything to wash…” Louis rolls his eyes fondly, thinking of Liam’s mum barging in and looking for unclean clothes. She’s just the type of mother to miss her son over a week and then barge in to see if he’s still there. Louis loves Karen. It’s that simple. “MUM!!!!!! Please.” Liam whines embarrassed.

Louis gets out of bed, leaving Liam to whine to his mother and rummages through his papers to find the master-plan list. It’s just a small 6 pointed list of things Louis has to do.

“Are we in agreement then?” Liam suddenly asks through the phone. Louis is still staring at the tiny paper. A small tee stain has already found itself on its right-hand corner. 

“Yeah yeah.” Louis gives in.

“Remember, get something he likes.” Liam reminds him. 

“I don’t knaw wha’ flowers ‘e likes.” Louis says, rubbing his tummy absent-mindedly. 

“You know his favourite colour is blue.” Liam argues, shaking his head. “At least that’s what you said.”

“Yeah, I kna.” Louis mumbles. “Cheers Lia-um.” 

“Welcome Boo.” Liam chuckles at his own joke. Louis hangs up and stands. He glues the masterplan above his table with an excessive amount of tape. He turns around and looks at himself in the mirror. His side view, he decides, not that pretty. Louis rubs his tummy again and pushes his shirt up to reveal the slight bulge. He moans, no matter what he tries it never goes down. He’s just destined to have a fat tummy, huge arse, fatty thighs that barely fit into his tight jeans andthose ugly dimples at his spine. Louis flops back on bed, mewling over Eleanor’s latest diet plan for him.

Louis was building up the courage to ring the bell in front of Harry’s house. “What?” Louis turns around. Harry’s neighbour is looking at him over the edge of the hedge with a condescending look. 

“Got nothing to say to you young man.” He responded and uses his nail scissors to cut a few loose leaves sticking out of the top. “This is a good representative place and you are a very unruly defying young man. You don’t fit in here.” 

“Oh do me favour and get fucked, pal.” Louis shoots back. He rings the bell demonstratively. The man hisses at him like a child who does not want to give up his toy. Louis raises his chin and faces the door. The blue flowers cradled in the nook of his arm.

“Louis!” Anne says surprised. “What are you doing here?” Her eyes fall to Louis arm. “Who are those for, love?” 

“Hi Anne, ye look lovely.” She cocks her hip and grins at him as if she knows what he is doing. “I was lookin’ for Harreh, wanted to ask ‘im about his grandmother. How is she doing?”

“Oh.” She sounds surprised. Anne leans against the open door, “she’s fine. She fell down some stairs and broke her leg. They’re keeping her in the hospital for a few days. She’ll be fine. She’ll outlive us all, I promise.” She shakes her head, so her dark hair tumbles around her. 

“Thank God.” Louis says more to himself than to her. 

“Yeah, well, she has the tendency to the dramatics.” Anne smiles warmly. She points to the flowers. 

“They are for Harry. Is he here?” Louis asks.

“You got my son flowers, because his grandmother is in the hospital?” Anne smirks while asking, her dimples grave into her cheeks. Louis’ heart skips a tiny beat. Harry just looks so much like his mother.

“No. I got yer son flowers, because he’s cute and deserves flowers.” He says.

Anne lets out a tiny laugh, “don’t I know it? I’m sorry, but Harry isn’t here.” She pouts a little. “He’s with his father and grandmother, in Manchester. I’m sorry.”

“Oh.” Louis looks down at his flowers not sure what to do with them now. “Can I leave these here for him?”

“YES.” She almost screams at his face. She quickly notices her loud outburst. She pinks up a bit, and quickly turns her body to grab a vase from the kitchen. When she returned, she helped him put the flowers into it. “How about you write him a note, yes?” She pulls him into the house and sits him down in the kitchen isle with a pen and paper.

Louis stares at the blank page. When he was younger, he used to write these notes to the people her really like. He’d write these essays, scribbles of what ever came to mind why he loved these people so much. He’d print out a picture or two and just write everything he could think of. But he can’t do that right now can he?

He ruffles through his hair and puts the pen on paper. 

Loveliest Harry,

Some flowers for the perfect boy. I mean just look at your dimples, your curls, jeez Curly your just that perfect, aye? Don’t panic! I’m not here to see you flushing adorably. I hope your grandmother is alright, and I feel like a dick how I left things at the bus. I didn’t mean to assume anything. You might say I’m a tiny bit jealous of that twat Nick. (I never said that, though). Any who, when you come back enjoy these flowers. Blue petunias they are. I’ve been told they meanb eing with you is soothing. Which it is, Harry. Until soon. 

L

Louis folds up the paper and sticks them between two flowers. “I’m off Anne. Thanks for everything.” 

“Thank you for coming by.” Anne reappears and gives him a kind smile. “He’ll love this, I promise.” 

“Cheers.” He waves awkwardly and walks out the door. Louis drives through the town aimlessly for a half an hour. He can’t go home right now. Every time he steps on the gas, he can feel the adrenaline rush through him. The streets blur by, the people disappear into anonymous, and he can feel the relaxing sensation of letting go. _Freedom, I suppose._

Louis stops the car in front of the twins’ ballet studio. Mothers are bickering at each other in front of the entrance, in a show of fake friendship. Secretly they hint at the achievements their child has already achieved that the other mother goes pale or green from. Louis always hated when his mother tried to slip his captaincy into a normal conversation. He sighs and waves at one of the mothers who he vaguely remembers. She’s still quite young in comparison to the others, having had her son out of wedlock. Louis liked her because she allowed her son to go to ballet class, even if that stood against the gender roles implemented into the society of Cheshire.

He sends a quick text to Dan and his mother that he’s already outside the studio, and he can pick up the girls. There is a knock on the window, and Louis quickly lets the window down, “hey Louise.” 

“Hello Louis. Not coming inside?” She waves at the doors.

“Nah. They always find me.”

“You got a lot of faith.” Louise shakes her hair. “Lux gets lost at every turn.” A small smile plays on her thin lips, and Louis does the courtesy and laughs at her flat joke.

“I can’t lose mine. They are like two boomerangs.” Louis pulls a face as if it were a problem. Louise giggles. “See, boomerangs.” Louis points at his two sisters who are still clad in two very pink outfits. Louise smiles, because she sees her son, Lux, tugged in between the two. 

“Have a good day Louis, and thank you for making me feel normal.” She smiles and walks away. Louis watches her grab her son and turn him away from the pink girls. His heart clenches, he knows she’s saving up to move to Manchester in the hopes that folk will be nicer to them there. But Louis has the feeling that sooner than later, Lux will have to give up ballet to do something more adequate for a boy.

Daisy and Phoebe pile into the back, they don’t even notice Louis hello, while they are babbling about the lesson. Moaning and groaning because a girl named Sissy keeps them out of synch. Apparently she’s always two seconds behind every one else. Louis chuckles at their annoyance and slowly drives them back home. “Lou, will you play footie with us tomorrow?”

“We still don’t have a goal.” Louis says, looking into the mirror to see their doll-like faces frown. “But who needs them, aye?” Their hands clap together in joy and their heads fall together to whisper to each other in a secret language. At first his mother was worried, but the doctors told them it is very normal for twins to develop their secret language. Louis often wondered if they understood what they were saying or simply felt the message behind the useless words. One day he’ll ask. One day.

“Louis honey, ye look sad.” Johanna says, while she slips on a stool. She moans a bit and looks more tired than usual. 

“Fine mum.” Louis replies and closes the laptop he had used to write a paper he had forgotten about. The trip had been much more important, and he’d procrastinated until then. 

She reaches over to flip his fringe. “This the thing ye talk to Dan about, but not me?” 

“It’s under control, mother.” Louis argues. 

“Okay.” She sighs. The underlining message properly placed, _we were best friends once._ “Want to help us make some killer quiche loraine?”

“Ye turnin’ French now?” Louis’ face lifts into a tiny smile.

“Just trying to keep it interesting.” His mother says. Louis shakes his head fondly.

“I ‘ave t’ finish this shit.” Louis points to the laptop.

“Louis!” She warns. 

“Sorry.” He says, but doesn't mean it.

Fizzy skips down the staircase and beams at them “alright mum let’s do yer French girl thing.”

“Ye two I swear.” Jay shakes her head, while she gets up through the mere strength of her right upper arm pushing her off the table-top.

“What’s wrong with ye sulker?” Fizzy rubs her hand through Louis hair. 

“Stop it would ye!” Louis moves his head to free himself. Their mother starts humming to herself, a song which she had stuck in her head since her drive home from a weekend shift. Fizzy sits down on top of the table, while Louis opens his laptop again.

“Just have t’ finish this chicken shit, don’t I? And it’s boring as fuck, innit?” He grumbles to himself. A message appears on Louis home screen and Fizzy snatches it away from Louis small hand. 

“Oh look it’s yer friend, the tosser…” She reads the message and grins. “Harry’s number? And what is the plan exactly?” Louis grabs his phone and reads the message for himself.

The Tosser  🙄

Voilà harry’s number: [0161 9496 0081](https://fakenumber.org/phone/0161-9496-0081)

Remember the plan! One in the morning, one at night.

You want him to think about you. Give him something

to miss you for.

Cheers loser

Louis grins as he replies and adds Harry’s phone number to his contact list. “Earth to tossers!” Fizzy snaps her fingers in front of his eyes. “Who’s the tosser? And what plan have ye devised?” 

“Just a small plan to woo…” He looks over to their mother just five steps away, “ye know who.”

“Oh goodie.” She claps in her hand like the twins yesterday. “I want in.” 

“Ye kna too much already.” Louis winks and closes the laptop. He gathers his things, while Fizzy pouts. Louis grabs all his school stuff and throws a wink to his mother “better study upstairs.” 

“I could help ye know! In all areas.” Fizzy calls after him, before she shrugs and joins her mother to roll the dough she had created.

Louis falls down on his bed and stares at Harry’s number for a while until he starts typing. His finger hovers over the send button. After a short pause he does send it. 

Curly 

Got ur number from Liam. I hope u got me 

flowers, luv. Have a gd night, Curly.

Louis looks down at it. His face is burning and his hands feel sweaty. He stays like this for a couple more minutes trying to will Harry to read it quickly. After another few moments he throws the phone away and starts writing his essay. 

Over dinner Louis sees the grey little ticks going blue. But Harry doesn’t reply. _This is going to be harder than I thought._ Louis was counting on Harry’s politeness to answer to him even if he weren’t too keen on it.

Louis lies in bed, almost a hand down his pants just to relieve the pressure, when Harry finally replies. He’s so excited his hand loses its grasp on his phone and it hits him in the face. _One to many times._ Louis growls before he finally finds his WhatsApp chat.

Curly 

U too lou

Sleep tight gorgeous

Sleep tight :)

Dream of me  🤪

Louis puts the phone away and grins to himself. _Where was I?_ _Ah, that’s right._ He fumbles for his phone again and opens the secret album app, where he finds the picture of Harry in tight yellow swim trunks. He sighs, the contact of his hand feels amazing around himself. _Wish it were Harry’s hand._ Louis groans and fastens the pace on his dick, thinking about the way Harry’s long fingers had rubbed over his cock in the bathroom. How desperate they were for each other. He comes too quickly and doesn’t feel very satisfied. 

💚🍑💙

Louis walks into college, his back slung over his back. He had just asked his dad, Mark, to come see him at their away game this weekend. _He used to come to all me games,_ Louis whines in his own head. He passes a few people who great him. Louis just nods. He takes a deep breath before leaning against the door to Management, waiting until the bell rings. He’d rather not start the day with allowing Cow-hell the ability to just shoot at him. Neither does he fancy seeing Zayn before the bell rings. He leisurely texts a bit, until cute pigeon toed feet clad in Chelsea boots make him look up.

He never realised Harry’s locker is right in view of Management class. It makes him a little angry to know that Cow-hell can stare at the boy any point in the day. Harry’s green eyes fix on Louis’. Louis smiles at him, this morning he had sent him the ‘Have a sweet Morning’ text Liam ordered. And Harry had sent a smiley back. But right now he’s not smiling. He closes the door on the small cabinet. The word ‘Slut’ is written in black thin pen on the blue pastel colour of the locker. Louis’ face falls. The well-worn leather messenger bag slung low on one of his hip, and he walks off without acknowledging Louis further. 

The bell rings.

Jade grabs his wrist while jumping into class, dragging Louis with her. Solemn he sits down in his usual spot. Zayn looks up from the nap he was taking. The black hoodie hides the black hair in disarray and the tired dark eyes. “Hey.” He says groggy.

“Mornin’.” Louis replies. He searches for a pen in his bag and a lose piece of paper, because who owns a proper notebook anyway? Louis scribbles the words down which are already written on the smart board introducing todays lesson. Cow-hell enters the classroom in that moment. Louis wishes he could say something along the lines of ‘your late’. But he’s afraid he’ll get detention again, and he can’t miss any more footie, school play, nor work.

“Louis, will you ever talk to me again?” Zayn mumbles into his sleeve.

“Probably not.” Louis says. 

“Seriously? There was no way I could have known about you and him. I get it I did something stupid but I had no idea you were after him!” Zayn hisses, Louis’ nerves spike up. He looks around to see if anyone is listening to them. At the moment they are the only two people stupid enough to talk during Cow-hell’s class. Zayn rolls his eyes over Louis’ paranoia.

“Thats not the point.” Louis hisses, trying to remain his voice as calm and silent as possible. “No one was to knaw who wasn’t there! Jade held ‘er mouth shut!” He points to the caramel high pony tail in front of them.

“Oh please don’t compare me to the whistler.” Zayn says with a tiny laugh in his voice. Louis hasn’t heard the nickname before, and it troubles him a bit. He can’t imagine it being something positive.

He is proven right when the ponytail whips through the air in front of Louis, almost whipping him across the face. “What did u call me?” Jade says. “You know that I’m a pussy licker now, right?” She adds. _Which okay! Weird?_

_“_ Oh please, like I could forget what you do to my girlfriend!” Zayn retorts. Louis’ getting a little annoyed this isn’t about him and Zayn anymore. He has the feeling Zayn forgot the reason for their talk in the first place.

“Stop both of you!” Louis holds up both hands in their faces, “it doesn’t matter if I fancy someone or not you weren’t supposed to say anything. Maybe, I don’t want anyone knowing about me, alright? Ibiza was Las Vegas, mate. You broke the Las Vegas rule!”

“I just wanted to let him know he wasn’t alone.” Zayn argues. Jade sneers, but turns around to let Louis takes this one on his own. Louis’ heart rate is pumping him like he’s a jet, _what does Jade know? Do I have to tell her? Fuck, not another person to worry about!_

“ ‘e already knas that.” Louis finally says to Zayn. “Ye didn’t have to tell him I was sleepin’ around!” Louis rubs his arm. “Ye don’t even understand wha’ ye did! Ye got no idea.” 

“Mr. Tomlinson, starting the week on a good foot, are we? Why don’t you tell us what I just said.” Cow-hell says from the front. The room falls dead silent, an eerie kind of silence than the one they had interrupted. Louis can feel the irritation itching under his skin.

“Pardon, Sir. We’re done.” Louis says quickly. 

“In that case either you sit up front or you leave.” Louis shrugs. He bends down to his bag, grabs his pack of cigarettes and starts walking toward the door to leave the classroom.

“Sit down Tomlinson!” Cow-hell screams. 

“You said either or.  Hence I have a choice.” Louis smirks, opens the door and slips out of the classroom. 

He gets to his favourite smoking spot and pushes the cigarette in-between his lips. He lights it and pulls out his phone. 

Curly 

Have a sweet morning, my luv

:)

Where r u?

History y?

I’m bored  😟 Help

Go t class.. might learn something

ur no fun luv

the cow threw me out

y?

fighting w Zayn

oh…sorry

🤷🏼♂️

Worth it

Little shit had it coming

y arent u with me yet?

Curly?

Harry stops texting then. Louis hopes it’s not because he got caught because of Louis. Louis stays outside the choir room thirty long minutes until the bell rings. He waits at his locker, where Jade gives him his bag back.

“Cheers love.” Louis kisses Jade’s cheek. 

“Welcome, dear.” She giggles while she mocks him. “Are you okay, though?” 

“Dandy.” Louis replies. 

“I’m here if you ever need an open ear.” Louis smiles down at Jade, who grins back up. “We’re friends. You can trust me.” 

“Goes both ways, sweets.” Louis pokes her nose. 

“Why does this look like a lovers nest?” Perrie asks, as her hands circle Jade’s waist to give her a protective squeeze. “She’s mine, Tommo.”

Louis holds up his hand “no worries there darling.” 

“Got my eyes on you!” Perrie retorts, looking at him through the slits of her eyes.

After footie practice, when he gets back home Louis walks over to the family calendar. Jay had introduced it when the children had turned out one to many to keep track off. It occupied quite a big part of their kitchen, informing everyone of everyone’s whereabouts. It also helped Louis know at what point his mother was working her late or weekends shifts. Louis picked up his blue pen and wrote down the away game this weekend and stuck the flyer for the school play on right next to it with a massive amount of tape. With a red pen he circled the dates, ‘presence is mandatory!’ He grins to himself and joins Tommy and Lottie in front of the telly. He spends the rest of his day there, helping Daisy with her homework. Fizzy was helping Phoebe. When they were done, they switched their books so one twin could copy off of the other. _Mischievous little things._ Louis grins, _learned from the best._ “Ye know when ye go to school ye’ll have different classes and won’t be able to copy off of each other yeah?” Lottie scolds, while she twirls Tommy’s finger in her own.

“Not today.” Daisy grins as she tucks her fourth grade maths homework under her arm. Phoebe giggles loudly, and they run upstairs to play something different. 

“I wish I were a twin.” Tommy grumbles a bit.

“I should have been a twin.” Louis says. “Two of me, how much shit we could have done.” 

“Oh, Lewis, I actually think ye would have hated it.” Lottie grins. “Not all the attention on ye but on yer other half, how would ye survive?” Fizzy joins her laughter and Louis throws the half-eaten sandwich in Fizzy’s face. _Retaliation feels best._

💚🍑💙

The rest of the week goes by quickly. Every Morning he sends Harry a text, sometimes just asmiley, and every night he wishes him a good sleep with dreams of himself. Cow-hell retaliates on him by kicking up the verbal quizzing during the lesson, using Louis as an example to study harder. 

Friday rolls around, and Louis finds himself getting on the club’s bus to drive to the match against the Liverpool Buccaneers. Coach Winston has a smirk on his gorgeous face, allowing himself to smile as his team hypes themselves up through loud obnoxious music. Half of the team is trading food over seats, and others are dancing in the aisle. Louis fits himself through the dancing teammates, feeling happier already by the loud music. He plops down next to Niall. “Oi.” He grins at the blonde fellow.

“Hello.” Niall grins. 

“Listen, mate. I was going to ask ye for somethin’.” Louis says, while Niall stuffs some chips into his mouth. “Are ye supposed to eat this much before a game?” 

Niall shrugs, he speaks with an open mouth almost spitting the crumbs over Louis’ pullover. “No one is stopping me.” 

“I get serious stitches on the pitch.” Louis says, his eyebrows pulling together remembering the pain from learning that. 

“Don’t have that problem, mate.” Niall grins. “What you need?” 

Louis brushes some crumbs from his jersey he decided to pull over in exchange for the uniform shirt. “Oh yeah… Ye kna I’m in the school play right?” Niall nods. “Can ye teach me the guitar?“ 

“What?” Niall’s jaw drops, giving Louis a view of the chomped up chips. 

“Don’t really ‘ave t’ play the guitar. There’s a guy behind the curtain who plays it, but I ‘ave t’ look like I can play.” Louis says, causing Niall to laugh. Louis punches him in the dick for good measure.

“Shit, alright, alright…” Niall moans, leaning forward cradling himself. “I’ll help you, you fucker.”

“Alright, boys. Get your hands out of your pants!” Winston screams, when he enters the changing rooms. “This is our second to last game this winter. We win today we’re already very close to the qualifications this year. So kick some ass!” 

“YeeeeSSS” Ashton screams while he rises up to his feet. “Kick ass!” 

“Let’s go out. Remember keep warm, even when yer on the bench. Don’t freeze up, aye?” Louis calls while they run outside to start warming up on the pitch. He sights Mark sitting on the bleachers, and he can feel his heart expand. It’s good to see his dad again, the glasses are a little fogged up and have tiny blotches of the drizzle on them that is surrounding them. Louis feels like he’s walking inside a cloud, the tiny drizzle feels like the water inside a cloud. He already feels drenched, and his muscles are tightening up from the ice-cold wind on his skin. 

“Louis!” Mark waves at him and Louis waves back, running over to hug his father quick. “Ye look gran’ son.” He smiles kindly. 

“I’m in warrior mode, makes me taller.” Louis laughs. 

“Looks good on ye.” Mark squeezes his chin. Louis missed his tiny button like eyes, that seem to know everything about him. 

“I got to go. I’m captain, mate!” Louis giggles, proudly pointing to the armband. 

“I kna.” Mark grins. “Go on then, I’ll be ‘ere all day.”

Louis turns around to run over to the referee, losing the coin toss. First half of the game they score two goals, one from Ashton and one from the new kid Danny. Louis helps set up one of the goals. Second half does not go to well. Louis’ toes feel like they are falling off, meanwhile the players start slipping on the wet and half frozen grass. They slip so many times, allowing Liverpool to gain the upper hand and score a goal. The whistle gets blown, just as Louis falls on his wrist. The pain screams through him and he groans loudly. Liam is next to him in a second. “Alright there mate?” 

“Fine.” He circles his wrist. It smarts a bit, but he’ll live. “We won?”

“Yeah, we won.” Liam laughs and helps him up. They shake hands with the other team. The team captain of the buccaneers gives him a kind smile, so different to the other boys who are all a bit blunt while squeezing his hand aggressively.

“We’re having a party at mine, if you want to come around.” Marcus smiles. “You do have your own bus right?” 

“Yeah yeah,” Louis smiles. “I’ll ask around for sure.”

“Great, I’m Marcus by the way.” The team captain grins. “Find me when you know.”

“Sure. I’m Louis.” Louis says.

“Loui with an s?” The guy grins. He’s kind of charming. He got a bright smile on his handsome squared face with chocolate brown hair sticking to his forehead. His posture is confident, and he looks a bit like a large closet from the square his shoulders are making.

“Yeah.” Louis grins. _Is he flirting with me? Nah, must be me imagination._

Louis goes back to his dad.“Hey dad, do ye mind if I stay the weekend, with ye I mean?” Louis gulps. He knows he’s been a bit flaky himself, refusing to come to Doncaster, because he’s got so many things to do in Cheshire. 

“Ye’re always welcome at ‘ome.” Mark grins, he looks so happy. 

“Oi Liam, want t’ come t’ Donny?” Louis screams across the pitch. Liam thinks it through for a moment, weighing homework against Doncaster. 

Finally, he shrugs and says “fine.” 

“They want us to come to a party now, though.” Louis points behind himself toward the changing rooms.

“Right.” Mark scratches his mouse grey hair. “No worries, I got a friend here in Liverpool. I can ask him if he got time.” 

“Cheers dad.” Louis smiles. 

“Oh why is she crying?” A girl says, she’s leaning against Louis while playing ‘Ring of Fire’. A card deck is lied around a large cup in the middle of the circle. Every card represents a different action one has to take.

“You are going to hate her.” Another girl, who is looking over Marcus’ shoulder says.

“Always need a villain at a good party.” A boy says, watching the crying girl move through the bodies of people to flee outside.

“Plenty of villains here.” Marcus argues. He pulls Jack and shows it to the group. All the boys take a drink. 

“Oh… don’t be so pessimistic, lovey.” An Irish girl caresses Marcus’ cheek with the back of her hand, pouting at him from underneath her eyelashes. 

“Not pessimism if it’s the truth, Bethany.” Another team player from the Buccaneers says. Louis finds Liam’s brown eyes and sees the same confusion on his face as on his own. The girl in his side feels heavy, and with Louis growing intoxication he’s sure he’ll topple over. He tries to push at her hips, but she’s pretty adamant in staying where she is. Liam watches the scene with clear amusement. A brown haired girl is stuck in his side as well, she reminds him of Sophia. _Have they stopped seeing each other?_

A loud squeal draws his eyes away from Liam toward the dance floor. A couple of girls had started dancing in the living room, some provocatively swaying their hips on top of the coffee table. But among them is a slim looking boy, with round dear like eyes. He’s squealing while a group of buff looking footie players are surrounding him and smacking him on the bum one after another like he’s a carousel. “Show us your moves then, show us what you can do with that bum of yours.” One of his aggressors laughs.

“Twirl, bitch.” Another says. Louis can hear Ashton laughing heartlessly. He spots him within the group, and his blood starts to boil, this feels familiar.

“Why don’t you fucking grow up?” The slim boy retorts, his hands still protectively cradling his own bum. While he circles on his feet, trying to stay out of arms reach. 

“Isn’t that the type of thing your type likes?” One of the footie players says, the circle is starting to get tighter around the slim boy.

“The way you pounce on Connor every time you see him in his underwear is there something you want to tell us?” The slim boys retorts. Q _uite brave,_ Louis thinks _._

“I’ll fuck you up boy.” A tiny boy says, he must be smaller than Louis himself.

“Hey, hey, hey chill out.” Their Captain circles around them. Pulling on the arm of one of the rude boys to put himself in the circle.

“You chill out, brov.” Tiny boy says, while he grabs his upper hand in a fashion of bro-ship.

“Hey back the fuck off.” Marcus hurdles him against one of his friends.

“That the way aye?” Tiny brushes his lips with his fist in a show of confidence.

“Back off!” Marcus strengthens his muscles, making him look like a large closet standing in front of the slim boy. 

The aggressors lift their hands and turn around to walk over to the kitchen, talking among themselves how ridiculous their captain is being by protecting the slim boy “I mean how does that make us look aye? We ain’t no homos.” Marcus turns to talk to the slim boy, who stopped trembling a few seconds ago. The captain grabs a small box and leaves through the sliding patio doors.

After a small amount of deliberation, Louis walks over to the patio himself. He lets himself slide down on the wooden patio. His feet slightly elevated by standing on the tiny step below him which goes into the garden. Marcus reaches over and gives him the blunt. Louis asks, “so ye ‘ave problems with that?”

He looks over his shoulder, “yeah. Try to calm them down as much as possible. They are in the same team for fuck’s sake.” He rubs his face in exhaustion.

“What do they do to him?” Louis asks looking through the large glass door inside, where the boy is getting himself a beer. For a few moments he saw himself as the boy, he knows when it ever slips who he is, he will be harassed for his large bum. Made fun of for his attraction, all reduced to jokes about his rear end.

Marcus is watching him, “do you have any?”

“Gays?” Louis asks, turning to look back at Marcus. “Not on the team. I’d like to be prepared. It’s just… there might be some closeted, its simple math after all.”

“Right.” Marcus says, there’s a tiny smile on his lips. “At the beginning they were cruel, they made him change in the girl’s bathroom. Locked him inside for some time until after practice they freed him to join the girl’s team’s practice which happens after ours.” Liam and Niall slide down next to them and nod along to what Marcus is describing. “Then they started taking his clothes from the changing rooms and exchanged them for tutus and dresses. Forced him to wear a big G on his clothes, for Gay.” 

“They did similar things to Harry too.” Niall quips up. Louis’ heart rate picks up. He knows Harry was assaulted, but things like Marcus just described, he can barely believe people would do that to each other.

“Who’s Harry?” Marcus asks.

“Our best friend. He is gay too.” Liam says. The _our_ feels punctuated to Louis, and he feels pride in knowing Liam and Niall would include him in this. “They forced him to wear lipstick. Exchanged his underwear for knickers during PE.”

“They once locked him up in a closet during wood tech. They said to him as a gay he’d properly rather crochet like a good little girl, rather than doing the man’s work of wood shop. They locked him up, and I found him after class.” Niall says. 

“Poor guy.” A tiny voice filters through to them. The slim boy, slides down next to Marcus and rests his chin on his shoulder. Marcus doesn’t seem to mind.

“We weren’t friends for a long while. We grew up together.” Marcus starts saying, as if the boy didn’t just cuddle up to him. “But we weren’t really friends. When he was outed, his friends abandoned him, so I decided to defend him.”

“My hero.” The boy chuckles. Louis smiles, _wonder if he knows his friend is in love with him_. The slim boy is looking directly into Louis’ eyes. He quirks an eyebrow, and a sassy smile spreads across his lips. 

“Does it get better?” Marcus asks, taking another long hit.

“We sort of exhilarated the process.” Niall grins at the memory. He waited a long time to shove one on those boys.

Slim boy frowns, “how does that work?”

“Louis here came into the picture.” Liam points at Louis. “And he made us beat the shit out of them.” 

“They beat him up first.” Louis defends himself, he’s not really sure why. Since slim boy is looking at him in awe, but Marcus has a thoughtful expression on his face. 

“Anyway, they don’t hurt him no more.” Liam adds.

“That’s good. He don’t deserve it.” Marcus says.

“He really don’t.” Louis says, looking up at the sky. The stars are very clear today, the clouds from earlier have disappeared somewhat and Louis wonders if Harry is staring out his window right now. _Maybe the light of one star reaches the both of us at the same time? Maybe it connects us? Like a string strong from one end to the other. Or the star is an anchor, trying to hold on to the fragile rope connecting our two ships together_. _Don’t let it rip little guy_ , Louis begs the star he’s looking at. “Wha’?” Louis asks, when Niall hits him on the top of his head.

“We’re getting more beer. You coming?” 

“Yeah, sure.” Louis says with dull coated voice. The slim boy is still staring at him, and Marcus is rolling another cigarette. 

The night goes on for a while. He dances and tries to keep his hips as frozen as possible. _No room for flamboyance_. Louis drinks to much and ends up in a bathtub at some point. He’s not sure how he got here, so he lifts himself out of it. He moves the curtain over to look out the window, _shit I’m on the first floor. Shit it’s dark! God no. Dad!_ Louis fumbles for his phone, his dad texted him half an hour ago, asking him when he’ll be ready to head home. He sends him a quick reply ‘Now.’ _Where the fuck is Liam?_ He opens the door to the bathroom. He really is on the upper floor, four little doors suggest there are bedrooms locked up here. The door across from him opens, and he is faced with the gay slim boy, who is pulling a jumper Louis supposes is Marcus’. “Hey.” Louis says, stuffing his hands in his pockets. He’s not sure why slim makes him nervous, _kay maybe I kna why, can he sniff me out?_

“Hi.” The boy grins and closes Marcus’ bedroom door behind him to throw his body against it. 

“Ye doin’ okay?” Louis asks, someone bumps past him to get to the bathroom, it’s another guy holding his dick through his pants like a toddler, because he has to pee so bad.

“Could ‘ave just peed in the bushes.” Slim boy calls after him just as the door locks. His eyes flitter back to Louis, “so you’re a part of the team?”

“Considerin’ we just beat yer ass, yeah.” Louis chuckles.

Slim boy rolls his eyes, “no not that. My team.” He writes a G across his heart with his index finger.

“Ehm…” Louis feels the panic spreading through him, into his bones. It makes his head swim and his fingers shiver around his thigh he is subconsciously grabbing through his pocket. The boy gives him time. “Yeah.” Louis finally agrees.

“No one knows?” He asks Louis.

“No, they don’t. We’ll… ehm… Harry does, I suppose.” Louis says. “And my friends.”

“Niall and Liam was it?” Slim boy asks.

“Yeah.” Louis nods, he watches the boy with careful slow eyes. The flush goes off in the bathroom, surprising Louis. He jerks, “they know, yeah.” 

“Do you love him?” Slim boy asks.

“Wha’?” Louis’ jaw drops. The door flies open and the guy steps out of the bathroom, he’s sipping up his fly.

“Want to watch or what?” The guy laughs.

“Bugger off.” Louis kicks at him, the guy stumbles away. 

“I saw the way your face changed when your friends told you about what they did to him. You had no idea.” Slim cocks his head to the side.

“I arrived half a year after his comin’ out.” Louis replies.

“You met him. Were told he was gay and you were shocked to find out you felt drawn to him?” Slim asks, a cocky smile on his lips.

“Somethin’ like tha’.” Louis rubs his chin, “are ye ever goin’ t’ tell Marcus about yer feelin’s?”

“He’s the only friend I have left, so no. Maybe when we leave college.” He shrugs. “What about your Harry?”

“He knas, just don’t think I’m truthful about them.” Louis says. 

“Are you?” 

“Yes.” Louis says with a lot of force, just the thought that he isn’t is hurtful. “He’s all I think about.” 

Slim chuckles, “you should see your face right there.”

“I can’t come out, pal.” Louis says, his head thuds against the wall behind him, as he looks up at the ceiling. “I’m not strong enough t’ be you.”

“You don’t have to.” Slim says smiling softly. 

“Feels like he wants me to.” Louis says, he can’t believe he’s having an honest conversation with this boy. Maybe the anonymous helps him.

“I don’t think he does.” Slim says. “You realise that no one wants to be outed, right? He did it on his terms, so you should be able to do that too. No one deserves to be outed, and every queer knows that. He was in the same position as you. He’ll never force you to do that.”

“Right. I’m trying to woo him.” Louis says, while he feels the warmth spread through his face. _God, it sounds so embarrassing._ If he could fist palm himself without looking even more embarrassing he would. 

“Okay. Good.” Slim approves. “Just remember he’s gay, so he likes the romcom stuff.” 

“Got tha’ covered.” Louis smiles.

“But he’s also a boy, so he likes the rough housing and the fun weird things you do with your friends. He’s not a girl. He’s still a boy.” Slim says.

“Right.” Louis furrows his brows while he levels his eyes again to stare at slim. “Didn’t think of tha’.” 

Slim chuckles. “Your welcome. I wouldn’t want Marcus to forget I’m not his girlfriend. I’m just a person he loves since forever and has a sexual attraction too. That’s what it boils down to.”

Louis raises an eyebrow, “well cheers.”

Slim pushes off of the wall, “just know there is always the possibility you might get outed, so you will have to confront it at some point. Especially if you’re with him. Because there is a difference between hiding behind closed doors and pretending the other doesn’t exist.”Slim says. “Whatever you do, never pretend he’s not there. Always acknowledge to others he is important to you, no matter the backlash.” 

“I will. I promise.” Louis says.

Slim walks back to the stairs, over his shoulder he calls “drop me a line on Facebook when you got him, yeah?” Louis chuckles to himself and follows him down the stairs. 

Mark drives them back to Doncaster, allowing the boys to play the music from his speakers. He stops at a gas station to pick up two sandwiches for the drunk boys. He throws a fluffy blanket at Louis head, knowing he freezes quickly. The two chew hungrily on his sandwiches on the backseat, but Mark smiles nonetheless enjoying the happy snickers from his boy. “You fuck him?” Liam whispers to him.

“Wha’? Who?” Louis asks, picking out a few crumbs from his shirt to put on his lip.

“Marcus’ gay boy?” Liam grins. “Saw you come down the stairs with him.”

“No. I’m sticking to the plan, alright. Staying abstinent.” He whispers, hoping the music covers their voices. “But he’s so into Marcus.” 

“Don’t worry they’ll find each other.” Liam giggles, “just like you and Harry.” He sings it along with the music.

“I don’t think so,” Louis says. “I think some love stories remain one-sided.”

Sallie washes their clothes, while Stan piles into the living room on Saturday. He greats Liam happily like an old friend. Louis and Liam spill all the funny stories they have pent-up from the college trip. Stan tells them about his freshers week which went everything but according to plan. He also tells them about coming home every other weekend, because his mother misses him too much. “Ye kna ye’ll ‘ave to come to London at some point right?” Stan grins. 

“It’ll be nice seein’ ye stroll, ye loser.” Louis chuckles. 

“Seeing the love you got for each other is heart-warming.” Liam laughs. They turn on Scary Movie and chew on tobacco, _which gross (_ was Luke’s dumb idea). Liam’s phone lights up and the caller ID get’s introduced as ‘Zayn’. Louis quirks a drunk eye at Liam, who quickly snatches it up. He stands up and leaves quickly.

“Wha’ was tha’ about?” Stan asks. 

“Zayn.” Louis replies. He told Stan about the Zayn incidents, which is why he too pulls a face. 

“Ye goin’ t’ confront ‘im about it?” Stan asks.

Louis shrugs. “He’s just bein’ Liam. Ye know? It’s who ‘e is. He sees a dyin’ dog on the street he takes it home. ‘e don’t like seein’ things hurt.” Deep down he knows there’s something different there. It’s the part where he doesn’t let his brain go too often. It’s the thought Zayn and Liam were friends before Louis came into the picture. They didn’t acknowledge each other in college, or Zayn didn’t, pretended like they didn’t spend every afternoon in Zayn’s shedsmoking pot. And he definitely doesn’t think about how he did the same to Harry. _Because I’m nothing like Zayn, NOTHING!_

Sunday morning he wakes up earlier than Liam, which surprises him more than anyone else. Louis pads down to the kitchen and boils some water. Preparing a Yorkshire tea. “Enough for two?” Mark asks as he joins him in the kitchen.

“Eh…yeah.” Louis nods. 

“I remember ye as someone who sleeps long. Either yer up early or ye changed too much kid.” 

Louis chuckles, “no, just up early.” The kettle whistles and Louis approaches the counter again, turning his back to Mark. He prepares his tea and gives it over to his dad, before he starts making himself one to. “So how is yer pride doin’?” Mark watches Louis halter for a second before he fills the teacup with the hot water from the kettle. 

“Gettin’ smaller.” Louis mumbles.

“Want to talk about this special someone?” Mark tries again.

“Not really. I sent an entire hour of last night talking to a dude in the bathroom about it.” Louis says, rolling his eyes annoyed. He liked talking to slim, but he’s getting exhausted from all the heart to hearts he was having in the last weeks, months even.

“Oh.” Mark drinks from his steaming cup.

“Liam is helping me, if that’s any consolation.” Louis turns around to face his dad head on.

“Good. I’m glad ye ‘ave someone.” Mark says, smiling softly, so he don’t spook him.

“Ye didn’t tell mum right?” Louis asks carefully.

“No, even if I think it’s damned odd ye won’t tell her.” Mark rubs his eyes, lifting his glasses on the back of his hand.

“Dad, too many people kna already.” Louis says into his tea cup. Softly he blows over the steaming cup.

“Kid, if it’s who ye are there’s not enough people who kna.” Mark says. Louis shrugs, feeling his stomach sink again. This weekend has been quite the roller coaster ride. He’s right Louis shouldn’t have to feel like he has to cover up some part of himself, but he’s not ready yet? _Why won’t no one understand?_

Mark drives them to Cheshire. Liam thanks him and Sallie like a good boy. Karen invites the Tommo-Boys, as she dubbed them in for tea. Mark ends up staying longer, because he starts watching Formula 1 with Liam’s dad. Louis and Liam sit down in the living room and type out their book review Louis had forgotten about until Liam mentioned it during tea. He’s never been this productive, within 2 hours he has all his work down for the next week. 

He gets a message when his dad pulls up to the house. It’s from Eleanor. But his stomach sinks again when he remembers, he totally forgot to write Harry his good night and good morning text. _Fuck!_ Louis quickly kisses his dads cheek, thanks him and runs into the house. 

Curly 

Have a good night baby

Filled with dreams of me

what happened to u this we?

annoy me every fuckin morning and 

night…got bored of me so easy?

Louis tries not to be too giddy when he notices Harry’s distress. Louis fist pumps himself, _go Liam and yer ridiculous plan._

Curly 

Miss me have u?

No comment

Miss u too  😇 How’s ur weekend?

Grandma is better.

She went home this Saturday. 

One legged queen

How’s work?

Fine. 

Ur game?

Won.

Did u score?

If I had what would be me reward?

Nothing  🤣

I was hoping for something more

I knw

Phew

Bad tease baby

Not teasing

Yeah u r

just dont know it

Goin to bed now

bye

🤣🤣🤣

see u at skol

dream of me baby

I never do

ur just scared it will b a wet dream

u miss me ass

Dont

Fuck off

Liked it more when u were ignoring me

  
Louis chuckles to himself. He sits up and stands in front of the mirror in his closet. He grabs his shirt and lifts it up, popping out his bum. He’s only wearing very short pyjama pants. His bum puckers out, and he sucked in his tummy, he quickly took a picture, looking over his shoulder, biting his thin lips. He sent it to Harry with the tiny note ‘have a nice wank’. He goes to bed chuckling.

💚🍑💙

“Good job on wining,” Eleanor mumbles.

“Cheers.” Louis rubs the back of neck. She’s being cold to him. “Have I done somethin’ ?” Louis feels stupid even asking.

“It’s what you don’t do Louis.” She says, slamming her locker shut. “You don’t text, you don’t come to my competitions. I didn’t even know you were at your dads the entire weekend. Not peep from you. Not one!” She says loudly. He’s not sure if she wants the entire grade to know about this, but she’s being too loud for Louis’ liking.

“Oh forgive me for bein' enamoured in me own game.” Louis puffs back at her. _Fine let’s make this a public fight, then._ “To which you didn’t come either, darling.” 

“It was an away game, no one goes to the away games.” Eleanor says. “Besides I had to be back on Saturday for my own competition.”

“As you said, yes.” Louis says. “At least I win the shit I fight for.” Eleanor whips around to him and stares down at him. 

“I say this without irony, don’t fuck with me Louis Tomlinson.” She says.

“We haven’t.” Louis whispers. Her face goes from angry to stone. “And if you want to threaten me with me whole name say Louis William Tomlinson, since it’s me full name. Expect ye to kna that after so many months of happy bliss, babe.” Louis turns around and walks off to Social Studies. For a moment he contemplates skipping. 

“It’s really not worthy talkin’ about.” Louis argues. 

“You had a fight loud enough for the whole school to hear.” Liam argues as he opens his lunch up. His mother still makes sandwiches for him every morning. There’s always a small apple and a candy bar, which he gives to Niall most days, with it.

“It was nothin’, mate. We’re just getting annoyed at each other with the whole situation.” Louis says.

“What situation?” Niall asks, as he and Harry sit down with them. Louis tries to mask his shock. Harry is sitting with a shy smile right across from him and Louis wants to reach out and tuck away one of his stray curls. 

“Me relationship fallin’ apart.” Louis says. Harry coughs into his hand. Niall rolls his eyes bemused. “Speaking off… are ye still seein’ Sophia?” 

“I don’t think so.” Liam shakes his head. 

“Why not? She’s nice.” Harry pipes in.

Liam starts making weird circle motions with his hand. “Did you ever notice she’s always got her hands in her hair? Like all the time.” 

“Yeah, she’s got nice hair. Just like Harry here.” Niall argues. Harry kicks him in the shin. Niall moans. “What? It’s true, you like fiddling with your hair.” Subconsciously Harry grabs his curls and bounces them. Liam jerks when Zayn slithers in to a seat next to him. 

“Looks nice, love.” Louis winks at Harry. He gives him a small unsure smile. Louis right foot searches for one of Harry’s large ones. He makes contact with a foot. Harry’s body rockets up a bit, but he doesn’t pull away. Louis gives him a cringe-worthy smile, and rubs his foot along Harry's for support. There’s a tiny blush crossing over his cheeks. 

The others kept talking about something different while Louis and Harry had their small conversation through their feet. Zayn’s arm is slung around Liam’s shoulder, and he is pressing him against himself.He’s watching Louis through cocky eyes. Liam says something and Zayn giggles into his neck. Louis can feel the goosebumps going up his arms. Harry bumps his foot again, giving him a questioning look. Louis just shakes his head, wondering if the digest of Zayn’s games is mirroring on his face. “What’s wrong with you?” Zayn asks him head on, when their eyes meat again. The long toe end of Harry’s Chelsea boot hooks behind Louis’ ankle in a move to clam him.

“Just wondering why ye called Jade the whistler last week.” Louis says earnestly. He hasn’t actually figured it out yet, but judging by Jade’s reaction it was not a nice thing.

“You said that to her?” Niall asks, the food dropping out of his mouth.

“Ew… gross, Niall!” Harry bends over to hook his hand under his jaw and close it again.

“It’s nothing.” Zayn says. 

“It’s not nothin’. She looked pretty hurt mate.” Louis says.

“Hurt? What about me? She stole my girlfriend.” Zayn says, tucking Liam against himself with an unnatural amount of force.

“What does it mean?” Louis asks. 

“Before, little miss perfect decided to become gay…” Zayn says, bending forward to sneer at him. Liam’s face moves forward to, but his head is turning red from the exhaustion of holding himself up to breath.

“It’s not a choice,” Harry quickly interjects.

“… before she decided to become gay.” Zayn continues, giving Harry a cruel look. Louis reflectively grabs Harry’s hand above the table to support him. “She sucked off the entire town. Remember the whistle song? Yeah, was more coincidence it came out at the same time. She’s a whistler.” 

“She didn’t even hook up with so many people.” Harry argues. His hand retracting from Louis’ grasp. 

“Was still too many.” Zayn says.

“I’m sick of the double standard, like she’s a girl she can hook up with how many people she wants to.” Harry says. 

“You’re just saying it, because someone wrote _slut_ on your locker.” Zayn argues. Harry turns pink and his eyes shadow. 

“Shut the fuck up.” Louis surprises everyone by saying. “Just shut up.” 

“You were asking.” Zayn argued. 

“Forget about it.” Louis says in his best Italian accent he can muster, trying to impersonate a mafia boss. “And why are ye so quiet. Real disappointing.” Louis says to Liam as he stands up. He throws his food in the rubbish and walks out of the cafeteria.

The lunches over the next two days continue being energy-starving. Zayn sticks to Liam’s side like a love sick puppy. He brushes his fringe, squeezes his muscles and giggles into his neck. And Liam, he thrives under the attention. He leans into the contact and starts touching Zayn thighs, shoulders and grins proudly when he makes Zayn giggle. Louis hates it. Niall is just as caught off guard as Louis and Harry. Harry, even though their feet touch under the table every lunch, tries to pull away from Louis affections, making bullet point number 5 harder. _Initiate physical contact_. Harry’s reluctance to touch Louis apart from their shoes, makes it impossible to get closer to the boy. Louis is frustrated and pent-up.

Before Management class, he catches sight of Harry standing by his locker talking to Danielle, who is standing on her tiptoes wobbling up and down. She’s holding on to his bicep, and giggling obnoxiously. Harry is politely smiling at her. Someone covered the word Slut with a canyon sticker. Louis waves at him with a little sad smile, before joining Zayn at their desk.

“Still not talking to me?” Zayn asks as soon as he sits down. Louis groans loudly. He’s not sure how many more fights with Zayn he can survive. 

“Fuck off.” Louis says, just as Jade and her friends sit down in front of them. “And leave Liam out of yer perverted games.” 

“It's not what you think. I didn’t see it before, but you and Harry you are terrible at hiding your intentions. It’s written all over your faces, so I figured if me and Liam get a little more handsy we can divert the attention away from you guys, you know?”

“So ye think yer actually helpin’ me?” Louis asks. “By using Liam?” Zayn nods, affirmatively. “You’re sick!” 

“Tomlinson care to share with the rest of the class?” Mr. Cowell asks. His voice darker than usual.

“Not something important.” Louis says.

“Well in that case please move to the front of the class. There’s a perfectly empty seat right here.” Louis starts gathering his things. Cow-hell looks a bit surprised Louis is going without a fight. But he likes poking the bees-nest. “No worries, Mr. Malik. You can email me when the separation anxiety gets too much.” The class chuckles, while Louis takes a seat up front. The lad next to him smell terribly, but at least he is too petrified to talk to Louis. 

The next day, Louis walks to Management class again. There might be a little bounce in his step, he’s going to sit up front today out of his own will. Liam and Eleanor could split up, and he could sit next to one of them. They could take turns sitting next to the smelly lad. But when he gets there, suddenly the seat is taken. “Who’s this?” Louis asks the smelly lad.

“This is Ian.” Smelly says.

“Why the fuck are ye in this seat?” Louis asks.

“I’m always in this seat.” Ian says.

“He was sick yesterday.” Smelly interjects Louis from slamming him another one. Louis growled annoyed, stumping his foot against Ian’s desk-leg. He turns around and walks out. He finds the next bathroom, scribbles ‘Out of Order’ on a piece of paper and sticks it on to the door. 

10 minutes later, sitting on the basin right next to one of the sinks. He grabs one of his cigarettes and lights it, enjoying the tobacco surrounding them. The door opens, and someone walks in. Louis can’t see them from here, so he waits until curls walk around the corner.“What are you doing here?” Harry asks with large doe eyes.

“Skipping management. Can’t stand seeing Zayn at the moment.” Louis says and sucks on his cigarette.

“You chose to skip in a bathroom?” Harry asks, incredulous. 

"I put a sign on it saying ‘out of order’.” Louis says, wondering if Harry hadn’t seen the sign, “no one will come in.” 

“Oh.” Harry scratches the back of his hair worry written all over him when he stares at the urinals.

“They still work.” Louis smiles. 

“Phew” Harry lets out a whistling sound through his front teeth. He walks over there, and Louis can hear his pee hit the urinal.

“You know the first time we met you peed on me.” Louis reminisces. 

“Yeah I’m still sorry about that.” Louis can see his ears turn red. “I was so hyped up just being at the concert and I just… kind of… was too jittery I suppose.” 

“No worries got me attention, innit?” Louis snickers.

Harry sips up his fly and flushes. He walks to the sink Louis is sitting next to. His arm gently rubs against Louis thigh while he washes his hand. Louis hands over some paper towels, so Harry doesn’t have to lean over him, which are squished at his side.“I have to get back to general studies test.”

“Mr Tomlinson, please come to the headmaster’s office, Mr Tomlinson.” The bored voice of the headmaster’s assistance blares through the half-broken speakers.

“Sounds like they’re looking for you.” Harry says, rubbing his hands together just as if he wants to warm them up.

Louis takes a deep drag and stares at the sealing. “Suppose so.”

“Are you okay, Lou?” Harry asks, softly. The nickname makes his heart jump.

_Didn’t kna u cared,_ Louis thinks. “Sure.” He says, he straightens his neck to look at Harry. “You get me flowers?” Louis asks, because he never heard back from him. 

“Yeah, thanks. How’d you know blue is my favourite colour.” Harry asks while clasping his hand in front of him.

Louis shrugs “must ‘ave said it at some point.” 

Harry looks at him inquisitive, “have you talked to Liam about Zayn?”

“No, why?” Louis asks. 

“You should talk to him.” Harry finally says. The speakers demand Louis again, and he groans throwing the cigarette into the sink. “And you should go to the headmasters.” Louis can hear the Chelsea boots click away until the door swings closed. Louis mumbles something and sprays his face with water, wetting his hair a bit.

“Mind telling me why you are skipping on your class today?” Headmaster Higgins asks. 

“I was sick.” Louis lies, and flips his wet fringe across his face. 

“Right.” Higgins shakes his head. “I know you don’t like Mr. Cowell’s class, so how aboutyou just tell me you skipped on purpose. I can give you a quick detention, and that’s it.” 

“But I was really sick.” Louis says. “Just ask Mr. Styles he saw me puke in the loo just a minute ago.” Louis says, he really does not fancy any detention this week.

“Hmmm…” Higgins is looking into Louis honest face. He calls in his assistance who calls for Harry over the speakers. Louis can’t believe he’s going to such lengths. 

A few minutes later, Harry steps into the room. He looks worried, until his eyes land on Louis. His own green eyes go into slits. “We were wondering, Mr. Styles, if you could tell us if you saw Mr. Tomlinson in the bathroom today.” 

“In the bathroom.” Louis chuckles. “Puking my guts out more like.” 

It’s quite comical how Harry’s eyes go wide when they lock with Louis’, “oh yeah... he was quite sick…" Harry slurred the words “I told him to go see the nurse, but he’s stubborn this one.”

Louis grins at the taller boy who is fidgeting a bit under the gaze of their headmaster. “Fine. Fine. See if I care.” Higgins throws up his hands. “Styles go back to your class. Tomlinson, go to the nurse.” 

“I’m feeling much better.” Louis tries to say. 

“Do me a favour, keep up your spiel.” Higgins throws them out. 

“Thanks.” Louis says to Harry.

“You owe me one. I’m missing like most of my time for my test!” Harry says, before he runs off to continue said test. Louis fondly rolls his eyes.

💚🍑💙

“You are the absolute worst brother.” Fizzy says, while Louis throws the food on the kitchen aisle. Lottie and Fizzy are helping him set up the dinner for the kids, while Dan and Jay were on a small date night. 

“Wha’? I got food.” Louis argues while he rips open the pieces of paper to free the food. He spills them on someplates. “DAIS! PHEEBS! DINNER!” He screams up the stairs, while Lottie grabs some of the dishes to place them on the coffee table. 

“Absolute worst.” Lottie laughs. “Ye’re giving us grease!” 

Louis looks down at the Fish&Chips he took home from work. He shrugs, “just takin’ home some food from very much hard work.” Louis giggles to himself. The twins jump down the stairs and pile onto the sofa. “Ye kna Rachel told me people like me are the fault of fat and ugly people.”

“That bitch. She really needs an ass-kicking.” Lottie shakes her head in disbelief.

“Ye realise the one thing she’d really hate? If ye cut of her hair.” Fizzy grins.

“Jesus,” Louis shakes his head, while Lottie stares at her with an open mouth. “How underworld-ly of ye.” Fizzy laughs and they wait for the film to play which Fizzy and Lottie had picked out to fit for two 9-your-olds. 

An hour into the movie the bell rings, Louis as the man of the house, gets off of the sofa. He’s surprised to see Calum standing behind the door. “Hey, mate. What ye doin’ here?” 

“Hi.” Calum grins. “I… actually I got some wood from wood tech. I heard Ms. Murray didn’t allow you to take any for yourself, so I did.” 

“Wood tech?” Louis’ brain takes a moment to take in what he’s saying.

“Yeah, you wanted to build a goal for your twins.” Calum says, he scratches the back of his head. “Just didn’t want to let down the precious Pheebs.” Louis has to smile, because yes he loves it when other people acknowledge the beauty of his sisters.

“Ye’re tryin’ t’ woo me baby sister?” Louis laughs. “Mate, she’s nine.” 

Calum turns red and shrugs. “Never had a sister.” 

“Well, I’m goin’ t’ accept yer gift, but yer not datin’ me sister. Not a single one!” Louis warns with a smile and chuckle in his words.

Calum holds up his hand “No worries there. I’m with Jesy remember?” 

“Yeah, I kna.” Louis looks over to Calum’s car. “She here?”

“Yeah.” Calum nods, “how about it, want the wood?” 

Louis laughs at the pun which Calum doesn’t seem to realise, “sure.” Louis grabs his shoes and follows him outside to the car. “Oi Jes.” He waves at the girl sitting on the passenger side. She smiles and waves. 

Calum and Louis carry the wood toward the tree house and dump them underneath it. “Jade and I were thinkin’ of stealin’ it. Suppose she’ll be disappointed ye robbed her of tha’.” 

“I’ll think of something to make it up to her.” Calum laughs, while he brushes his hands on his pants. 

“Want to come in?” Louis asks him when they are back at the car. 

“Yes.” Jesy says. “I want to meet this girl who stole my man’s heart.” She solders off to the front door and Louis struggles to follow her. 

“Girls this is Jesy. Jesy this is Fizzy, Lottie, Daisy and Phoebe.” He points them out one by one. 

Jesy crouches down in front of Phoebe, who cuddles up to her sister a little closer. “So you stole my man’s heart.” 

“I don’t know what ye are talking about, Mam.” Pheebs squeaks. 

“I see it now.” Jesy winks at her. “You are polite, very smart and look how gorgeous you are.” She pokes her into her cheek and Phoebe giggles. 

Calum rounds the sofa with a smile. “Cally!” Phoebe squeals happily this time and jumps into his arm. Calum squeezes the girl a bit, surprise written all over his face.

“Cally?” Jesy mocks him, while she falls down on the sofa. “Fish&Chips, I love you guys.” 

“He’s just bad like that.” Fizzy chuckles looking at Louis. He rolls his eyes. They continue watching some chick-flick thing, while Phoebe remains in Calum’s arms. Daisy decides to move closer to Lottie’s side and breathes into her neck.

Their silent bliss gets disturbed by loud honking outside the house, the squeaking of car wheels on pavement. “CALUM!!! YOU DIM-WHITED SLUT, COME OUT HERE!” 

Lottie and Fizzy freeze and stare at Calum. “Tha’ Ashton?” Louis asks the boy. He shrugs and stands up to get to the door. 

Calum peaks through the glass decorating the door, “yeah… that’ll be Ashton.” He opens the door and steps outside. “Hey brov.” 

“So this is where you have been hiding? With Tommo? That big ass cunt?” Ashton screams, while his car makes loops inside the driveway, almost hitting Calum’s and Louis’ cars. He’s hanging out of the passenger window, holding on to the roof while he screams his lungs out.

“Oh my God Louis!” Lottie looks at Louis with big scared eyes. She’s cradling Daisy in her arm, holding her hand over her ears. Jesy is doing the same with Phoebe, who Calum had handed over to her.

“The fuck do you want from me?” Calum retorts, he’s standing shoeless on the front door. “I have other friends than just you.”

“Fuck you, Calum!” Ashton continues screaming. “Fuck you and that fucking cunt too.” He points at Louis, who is standing behind Calum. “You know he’s staring in the play right? Proper poof shit that is…really want to surround yourself with vermin scum?!”

“That’s just stereotypical, brov.” Calum says back, much calmer than the blonde boy hanging out of his car. “Tommo is with El.” 

“Could be with Styles for all I care. You’re messing with the enemy.” Ashton screams. _Ah, that’s the problem, he thinks he’s loosing his friend to his sworn enemy._

“Fuck off Ashton.” Louis yells back. “I never wanted this. I never wanted to fight you, if you weren’t such an asshole.”

“Who the fuck asked you!” Ashton bellows back. “Michael stop.” Louis sees Clifford in the driver’s seat of the car. He pumps the brakes and the car squeals in protest from the sudden change of pace. Ashton moans, when his knees hit the dashboard uncomfortably. The engine goes out, because Michael didn’t kick the car out of gear in time.

“Never had much backbone to begin with.” Calum mumbles to Louis.

“What you dumb bitches whispering about?” Ashton looks at one to the other, he seems frantic, maybe a bit drunk.

“Just you dragging Michael into your shit again.” Calum steps closer to the car. The engine rattles back to life.

“So this is how you finally betray me, aye?” Ashton says, much calmer now that Calum is standing right in front of them.

“You have to look past this hate you have, for no reason at all.” 

“It’s disgusting. An abomination, it’s what your dad has been saying all our lives.” Ashton says.

“Even dads can be wrong, especially mine.” Calum says.

“Can’t believe your walking over to the devil.” Ashton is fuming again.

“That’s the real problem innit? It’s not me hanging with Jesy and her gay friends, it’s not that I changed my mind about all this shit about the queers. It’s that I chose to hang out with Tommo, who supports the rainbow.” Calum shakes his head and looks down at his feet, which is why he doesn’t see the attack coming. Louis is already stepping closer to tare at Calum’s arm, but he’s too late. Both are hit with a red and a green slushy from a gas station. Calum and Louis both scream in surprise and start wiping at their eyes to get the slushy out.

“Enjoy that you pussy’s! GO, GO, GO, Mike drive.” Ashton kicks at his friends arm, with which he kicks the car into gear. The car takes off, Calum and Louis start running. Their naked feet paddle over the hard pavement. Louis can feel the pain of a blossoming cut on his heel. But he’s covered in sticky ice-juice and Ashton woke his sisters, he’s mad. He’s running as fast as he can. So is Calum. Their hands drum on the boot, when Mike stops to see for passing cars before pulling onto the street. The car exhilarates and Calum almost falls face first on the pavement of the drive in, he was leaning all over it. Louis and Calum don’t look for traffic while they run in the middle of the street trying to chase a car, how dumb is that? A siren backs them off of the road, Louis and Calum save themselves to the pedestrian walk way. A cop car with blue light, he hadn’t seen before follows Clifford’s car. 

“Neighbours must ‘ave called the coppers.” Louis says. Calum helps him up.

“Shit, me and Jes got to go.” Calum and Louis walk back to the house, Dan’s car is parking in the driveway just when they round. 

“Bullocks.” Louis whispers. 

“I’ll get out of your hair. When the coppers ask what happened… what will you say?” Calum sounds nervous.

“Hey mum. Dan!” Louis waves at them. Jay blinks a couple of times at them.

“Where the hell have ye been?” She asks. “Did ye leave the girls alone?” 

“Nah.” Louis shakes his head and points to his shoes “wouldn’t leave the house without shoes, ma.” He smiles at her and grabs Calum’s elbow.

“Evening Mrs. Tommo… eh Deakin.” 

“Evening Mr. Hood.” Dan says, stern face in place to scold them.

Louis drags Calum’s elbow to the front door, which is still standing wide open. “He was just leaving mum.” Calum follows him. “I ain’t sayin’ nothin’ye don’t want me too.”

“Just I don’t know… don’t tell them, yeah? If we stay quiet, there’s still a chance for him to get it together, yeah? I think if we tattle to the cops, he’ll never talk to me again.” Calum says.

“Sure.” Louis nods. Jesy is already wearing her shoes and saying her goodbyes to the two alder of the four girls. 

“Twins are in bed.” Jesy tells Louis, while Calum gathers his things. “I calmed them down.” She points at Fizzy andLottie. “They were a bit scared, specially when you two took off.” 

“I’ll explain in the car.” Calum says.

“How about ye explain now.” Jay is standing in the door, one hand on her hip, the other dangling to her side with a takeaway baggie hanging off her index finger.

“Oh Mrs. J, you look amazing. Is that a MAC?” Jesy points to the lips. 

Jay blinks a couple of times, and her face goes blank when she realises who Jesy is. “Thanks darlin’. It’s actually a dior. My only.” 

“Great colour on you, gorgeous.” Jesy keeps flirting, while she manoeuvres Calum out of the house.

The couple is halfway down the steps when Louis calls after them, “stop flirtin’ with me mother!” 

“Can’t help it when a beautiful lady hovers in front of me like an angel.” Jesy shots back, just as she slides into the car and closes the door. Jay and Louis waves after them when they pull off of the drive. 

“Hmh.” Dan clears his throat. “Did we just forget why we were starting a conversation about honesty with your boy, because a girl was flirting with you?” 

Jay blushes lightly and licks her lips. She slides her hand up his arm, “of course not love.” She kisses him softly against the corner of his lips. “Louis, sofa NOW!” Louis shivers a bit. He knows this all too well, he knows the interrogation is coming. She greats her older girls with a sweet “hello my babies.” The two flee upstairs to pretend to go to bed, while in real they will be sitting on the stairway covered by the wall separating it to the kitchen, to listen in on Louis’ demise. 

“Sit down.” Dan says, while he sits in one of the armchairs. Louis sits down, facing the telly, while his mother, with a chin held high, sits down in front of him on the coffee table. 

Louis fiddles with his jumper. “What happened, Boo?” Jay smiles too sweet. Louis knows it’s her I-want-something-from-you-look.

“Nothing,” Louis lies. “Just took a run.”

“At night?” Dan asks, a smirk spreading over his stone-cold face.

“Yeah, just a friendly competition between friends.” Louis continues his lie.

“Boo…” His mother keeps smiling the scarily sweet smile and pats his knee. “You weren’t wearing any shoes, ye want me to believe yer story, make a better lie!” Dan chuckles behind her.

“Not a lie mum.” Louis easily says. “We were fighting over who is faster, and we just took off from the sofa. No time for shoes, ye kna how I am.” He grins at her, realising this is very believable. 

“I intend to believe ye…” She says, though it’s clear she doesn’t want to. “There’s just this one thing…” She trails off staring at Louis with judging eyes.

“What?” Louis asks very curiously.

“I’m yer mother, I can always tell when ye lie.” She giggles.

“How?” Louis asks, rubbing his sweaty hands on his knees.

“Oh, boo. I’m not going to tell ye. It’s a useful gift.” She winks. 

“But I’m not lying, Mum!” Louis promises her, putting on a pouty face to hide whatever feature is giving him away. Dan is chuckling when the doorbell rings.

“Who can that be?” Jay looks up confused. Louis quickly rubs his face to loosen it up for a better lie. Dan stands up with a sigh and walks over to the door. “You’re not freed from this.” Jay warns.

“Good evening Mr Deakin.” A gruff sounding man says. “May we come in?” 

“Has something happened?” Dan asks, shock clear in his voice. “Louis? Are all kids accounted for?” Dan asks turning to face him, while two police officers enter the house.

Louis can feel the ice-cold run into his face. “Yeah, they’re all here.” 

“This isn’t about a missing child, Sir.” One of the cops says to Dan.

“Come on Dave, don’t call me Sir, we’ve known each other since grade school.” Dave smiles tight. Jay subconsciously stood up with shock and is shaking Dave’s hand now.

“There was an incident here tonight.” Dave says, he took off his hat and is crumbling it in his hands. 

Jay automatically turns to Louis, “what did ye do?”

Louis touches his heart, “nothing! I promise. I was here all night and watched over the girls.”

“We had a date night.” Jay explains to Dave. 

“Well we got a call from a concerned neighbour who heard screaming, shouting, cars sounds which were concerning to them. When we arrived with our patrol, we saw a car pull out of the driveway, which almost dragged a teen boy behind it and then your son and said kid ran after it, drenched in some food colouring.” Dave sums up the incident pretty well. 

“Did ye catch them?” Louis asks, he’s still sitting on the sofa, twisting his upper body to look at the adults over the back of the sofa.

“That’s enough out of you.” Jay shuts him up. “Did ye find out who it was?” 

“No.” Dave says. “We came over to ask that of you.” Louis sighs a breath of relief. 

“Well?” Jay asks, hand back on her hip. 

“What?” Louis asks to gain time.

“Who was it?” Jay asks, Dave is watching Louis over his mother’s smaller shoulder.

“No one.” Louis tries. His mother breathes out like a dragon about to crisp her pray. “Look it was a bit of banter between me and some friends that wanted to come over. I told them they had to leave ‘cause me baby sisters a sleeping. That’s it.” 

“That don’t explain the kid being dragged by a car.” Dan says. On whose side is he on?

“We’re not pressing charges, so I think were done here.” Louis says. Dave, Jay and Dan are all staring athim with cocked eyebrows.

“Do you want to press charges Daniel?” Dave asks. 

Dan looks at Jay, who shakes her head. “Not right now, cheers, mate.” They shake hands while they both walk to the door. 

“If you ask me,” Dave whispers to Dan, “they weren’t friends.” Dan pats him on the back and faces Louis. He can see the two girls sitting on the stairwell, their eyes go large. Dan makes a shoo motion with his hands, hoping Jay won’t see him do it. The girls quickly slip upstairs. 

“What happened?” Louis’ mother asks him again.

“Mum…” Louis trails off. “I can’t tell ye.” 

“Ye kna by now the amount of things yer keepin’ from me could fill a book.” Jay massages her temple with both her thumbs. 

“I’m sorry.” Louis whispers.

“When did ye become this secretive?” Jay asks.

“The moment I set foot in this town, mum.” Louis says honestly and whisks past her to run upstairs. Dan catches him by the elbow. 

“Hurt your mothers feelings again, and I’ll tell her everything.” Dan warns him. 

Louis gulps, “understood.” Dan lets him go and Louis rubs his arm while he chances a look to his mother. She looks very small while she stands near the dinner table. “Night mum.”

“Night, boo.” She says, defeated. Louis catches a glimpse of himself in the mirror, _whoops I’m covered in slushy!_ The red slushy drips from his hair on to his shoulder and Louis has to giggle to himself.

💚🍑💙

Ashton doesn’t give Louis any grief since the thing at his house. Louis decides to ignore it and let Calum handle it, which somehow got through to Ashton. Only problem now is Calum and Ashton seem to be sort-of fighting, which can be seen on the footie pitch. Louis tries to engage with both of them on Monday and Tuesday the week after but neither really wants to. Even Calum turns him around and simply thanks him for keeping his mouth shut. 

Above all of that mess, Louis feels like shit for lying to his mother. He tries harder, buys her flowers and gives her cuddles and kisses to mend her heart. But it all pales to the way it used to be, _her and him against the world_. Also, Harry stopped responding to his text. Apparently he’s mad because of the bodged test Louis kept pulling him away from. Louis doesn’t relent however and sends him his usual text every morning and every night.

“But I miss Ross and his gorgeous eyes.” Leigh-Anne says. 

“Oh Romy, please spare us your drivel. Tonight we find you someone new.” Louis said and made a ridiculous jump.

“To the Capulets we go. Though, I cannot say how you made me join you. That traitorous family has cost many lives in the mine.” Eleanor’s friend Meg whines next to Louis. They walk across the stage slowly, the Halloween party they are meant to be attending already starting to form slowly behind them. The closer their character are going to get the closer the actors are going to move to centre stage.

“Here take some snow, get yer mind off your hatred.” Louis hands over a small zip back containing flour. 

“Oh cheers Ben. Couldn’t live without you and your great friendship.” Meg says, venom dripping through her words. She opens the bag and pretends to sniff the flour. 

“STOP. STOP. STOP.” Mr. Corden bellows. His belly slithers in circle, as he stares at Meg, who is covered in flour.

“What did we do wrong?” Leigh complains. They were doing this for the last hour. 

“Meg. Tommo. Do you have any quarrels between you two?” Corden asks.

“Not that I know of.” Louis says.

“Meg?” The teacher addresses the girl. “I can hear the hate in your words, darling. You’re supposed to be best friends in this scene. I need the audience to know your friends.”

Meg throws up her hands, “the way you screamed at El, totally uncalled for. So mean.” She turns her attention from Louis to their teacher. “And he didn’t even call her after!” She’s leaning forward with her hand on her hip staring at the teacher who is standing below them with bulging eyes.

“Sorry love, but tha’ ain’t yer problem.” Louis argues. “Try to act, would ye?” 

Meg’s nostrils flair. “I can’t work with him. I just can’t.”

“It’s a bit early in your career to throw tantrums, dear.” Corden smiles sweetly. “Alright, let’s just leave it at that. Tommo off the stage. We’re going to practice scene four. The suicide scene. Where is my Romy?” 

Danielle jumps past Louis. “I’m here.” Louis gets off the stage, and Leigh-Anne joins him.

“Sorry about that.” Leigh says.

“Not yer fault.” Louis argues, while he gets his notebook out to look over the latest song he had written for the intermission.

“Why won’t you call her, though?” Leigh asks. “Seems to be an easy fix.” 

Louis sighs, “I don’t want the easy fix.” Leigh opens her mouth to say something when her phone blares loudly out of her bag. 

Corden turns around “oh for the love of… take this serious… turn of your phones!” Leigh struggles to get her phone out and presses it to her ear.

“What’s going on… so what does he need?… I can do that… I mean I guess a few people would help from Drama club… yes, that’s where I am… Tell Harry we’ll be there in 10.” She hangs up and looks at a very interested Louis. 

“What’s going on?” 

“Listen up… I need bodies.” Leigh-Anne says loudly, “the volunteers of the abortion clinic are having trouble in getting all the patients into the clinic. I need bodies who can come with me… if you are willing for us to go.” She says to Corden.

He blinks a couple of times, “go…” He says defeated. “Go, defend your bodies young ones.” 

A couple of girls get up to grab their things. “What’s this got to do with Harry?” Louis asks while he’s already gathering his things and pushing his arm through his warm jacket.

“He’s the volunteer silly.” Leigh shakes her head.

“I got a car.” Louis excitedly squeals, jiggling his keys in the air. The girls applaud.

Louis pulls up to a grey damp building. It looks like absolutely nothing special, if it weren’t for the hundred people demonstrating with very vivid posters in front of the entrance. Danielle, Meg, Taylor and Leigh join Louis when he gets out of the car. They pass through the crowd as quickly as possible, remaining undetected by the crowd who is busy screaming “This is murder! Don’t become a murderer!” over and over again. Louis is holding on to two sets of hands who are grabbing at him. The girls are shivering from the horrible things thrown at them.

Finally, they pass a group with ‘Concerned Citizens with Community Values’ signs. It’s less than ten steps into the clinic, Louis can already see the ‘clinic escort’ vests glowing beyond the recovery line. He turns to the girls “run!” They bolt, a few tomatoes miss Meg’s head as she arrives safely inside. 

“Thank God, you got in.” Louis hears Harry’s lovely deep voice. He has the sudden urge to bury his nose in his neck.

“It’s hell out there.” Louis says instead. 

“Yeah…” Harry drifts off. “There’s only three of us here, and Niall and Liam are on their way.” 

“Jade and Perrie are coming too, their having trouble getting in.” Leigh-Anne asks. 

“I know the protestors probably think they’re patients.” Harry ruffles his hair. He’s wearing his tight black pants. Caramel coloured Chelsea boots and a black shirt which exposes his delicate nipples. Louis ponders if he isn’t cold with so much skin on display. 

“How can we help?” Liam’s voice flies to them. Niall is eating a tomato right behind him.

“Did ye just eat a tomato they threw at ye?” Louis asks Niall. 

The Irish simply shrugs, “don’t see why it should go to waste.” Leigh laughs and Meg rolls her eyes. Louis not sure what he should be doing.

Harry scrunches up his nose in fond before he addresses Liam’s question “we link up. All of us have to link arms, so we build a barrier, a cocoon of sorts. We take one of the patients in our mids and bring her into the clinic.” 

“Sounds easy enough.” Meg says.

“Can’t let go, though… of the linked arms I mean… or the patient is lost.” Harry says slowly. “They’re already very scared and being called a murderer isn’t really helping them either.”

“Cruel humans.” Louis says and shakes his head. “What do we do about the flying tomatoes?” 

“They’ll run out soon.” Harry says, shrugging his shoulders.

Louis ends up with Taylor to his right and Harry to his left. They link arms and box their way through the crowd. With his back to the people, it is easier for him to manoeuvre the group of escorts through the protestors. Harry gives him an encoring smile. “How often do ye do this?” Louis screams over the ‘murder’ chants. 

“Once a week… I’d help out more often, but… I also volunteer at the animal shelter.” Harry says.

“I see the babies would miss ye.” Louis grins. Harry lets out a sharp laugh, understanding the double entendre. They come up to the first car, where a scared young girl is sitting in. They let Harry turn to open the circle for her car door.

“Come on love.” 

“I think this is a mistake.” She whispers, brushing tears from her wet eyes. She can’t be older than Lottie, which scares Louis. _I need to ‘ave a talk with me sisters!_

“Love. Ye already made yer choice before comin’ here. Ye already made the hardest step, yeah?” Louis says. Harry throws him a warning glare.

“You’re here to help with protection, not talk to the patients.” Harry hisses. Louis’ face falls. He was just trying to help. Harry crouches down in front fo the girl. “Do you want this baby?” He asks her point-blank. 

She shakes her head. “How could I? Even the father left.”

“It won’t feel a thing.” Harry promises her. “And you aren’t killing anyone.” He points at the screaming crowd who are getting the idea of surrounding the escorts now. “You aren’t going to let these nutters take away your free choices, are you?” Her eyes clear up a bit, and she gives Harry a tiny smile. She shakes her head. “Alright then, get in the circle.” She nods and let’s Harry take her hand to lift her out of the car. The friend that drove her, joins them by climbing over the shift console. 

The way back to the clinic is harder. People are pushing against their backs. Some are trying to claw at the girl and others are screaming at her. Asking if she knows how many toenails the baby already has, asking if she hadn’t already picked out a perfect name. “How would you feel if you hear that name on a same other girl?” The girl squeaks, and her friend pushes her into her arms to hide her from view.

“You’re preforming Satan’s work!” Someone screams over the ruckus.

They make it back inside, where they unhook their arms and the girl thanks them. She and her friend make it to the reception area, where they are greeted by the nursing staff. “I hope were not too late, impossible to get in here!” Perrie says.

“Ye made it?” Louis states the obvious.

“We slip through when you were at the car with the first client.” Jade grins. 

“Harry!” One of the nurses calls him over. He returns announcing their second patient is already waiting on the side of the curb, petrified.

They go back outside, this time a middle-aged woman with a thin stature is getting escorted inside. She doesn’t have a car, and she’s alone. Louis again makes himself a promise to talk to his sisters. He would never want them going through something like this on their own. This time when they walk to the front door, the woman hides her face in her arms, squinting at the escorts over her elbow. The women is crying. 

Louis can feel for her. “This is all a bit much I just want to give a baby the right life, you know? I don’t have the money to take care of it and no child should grow up in the system. I know what happens to them boys in London on them streets.” 

“I understand, love.” Louis rubs her back while leading her to the front desk. He feels bad for her. She looks so de-solved. “Ye don’t have to justify yerself t’ anyone.” A nurse comes over and takes the woman out of his arms. 

“Doctors say, medically speaking I need to abort.” She says over her shoulder to Louis, still justifying herself.

“Lou!” Harry says sharply. “Next one is waiting.”

“Haz,” Niall says. “They stopped throwing tomatoes.” He’s actually pouting, Louis shakes his head with a grin on his smile. 

“We’ll get ye food later.” Louis laughs. Harry’s face falls into a tiny smile, a dimple popping. They link their arms again. Halfway to the large black Range Rover, a man in his forties presses his body against Harry’s back. Louis can see his shiver when the man’s arm try to circle him. 

“Leave ‘im alone!” Louis calls over to the guy. Leigh-Anne is linked between Louis and Harry, which is making it difficult for Louis to step in. 

“Don’t they teach you nothing at school these days?” The man screams into Harry’s ear. Niall, who is hooked to Harry’s other side, kicks at the man, he loses his balance a bit and detaches from Harry. 

“Godless piece of filth!” 

They reach the SUV. A mother helps her daughter slither out of the passenger seat. She takes her under her arm and hides her twenty-something year old daughter under her coat from view. Slowly they walk back to the entrance. There are more people pushing and trying to prod at the escorts. Louis can feel someone kicking at his shin. There must be more people now. He can’t believe there are so many people who would make such a fuss about abortions.

“Aren’t you ashamed of yourself boy?” The man, from earlier is back and plastered on Harry’s back again. He screams into Harry’s ear. “You wear a cross around your neck for Christ’s sake!” The man grabs at Harry’s exposed skin to reach the cross which dangles from his neck. Louis can feel bias rise up in his throat from the thought of the brute touching Harry’s porcelain skin and rosy nipples.

“Touch him,” Louis growls, “and ye die faster than the foetus in her belly.”

“Lou, you’re here for protection.” Harry schools him with a stone-cold expression.

“He’s touching ye!” Louis argues. Harry shakes his head again, effectively shutting Louis up. His blue eyes reach over to stare at the man, whose not relenting on Harry. Niall kicks him again, but this time it only causes him to shift away from Niall and scoot closer to Leigh-Anne. Needless to say, Louis doesn’t like this new development.

The team scoots closer together, so the spaces between them minimises, but the new protestors are ripping at their shoulders, trying to separate their linkage. “Hold tight!” Harry orders. 

“That’s what a mother should do to, hold tight to her babe.” The man says. 

“LET YOUR BABY LIVE!” A woman screams into Louis ear. 

“I say this with kindness fuck off.” Louis screams back. Meg chuckles next to him, and gives Louis an appreciated nod, since she too has a ringing in her ears because of her.

“God created life, don’t play God at his own game. His revenge will be nothing you can withstand!” The man against Harry says again, this time directing his words to the girl. “You let your daughter kill your first grandchild? What are you teaching her?” 

The black-haired mother turns around again to look at him, but decides not to defend herself. Only her grip on her tightens.

“You’re a bad mother!” The man screams. “And you are all doomed for helping them. Especially you young man, for turning your back on our Lord!” Harry shivers a little from the inclination. 

“Back off! You’re getting to close.” Harry pipes up, his eyebrows drawn together to make his face look angry and scary.

Louis had enough. He rips himself free “he said back off!” The girl in the circle squeals while the other escorts try to close the gap Louis created. Louis body collides with the man, who flies backward in the crowd. Louis is on him in a minute, straddling the man to the ground while his fist collides with his side. “Lou, Lou, stop!” Harry’s pleading voice reaches him. “Louis please. You have to stop hurting people like this, Louis please!” There’s a hand on his shoulder and a chest colliding with his back, trying to tare him away.

“Harry!” Someone screamsfrom further away. 

“MURDERERS!” There’s a ringing in the air.

“Louis!” Harry says again, his voice is shaking. There’s screaming from somewhere. Voices he can’t place. Louis falls off to the side, receiving a punch to the jaw. “Get off of me.” Harry screams.

“ ‘arry?” He says it quietly, while the man rips him into the air by his hair. He’s face to face with the asshole. 

“You’re an accomplice to murder.” The man spits in his face. Louis’ hands grab for his own hair, feeling the stinging pain of it getting ripped out. 

“Fock ye, mate. Who killed yer baby tha’ yer this mad?” Louis makes out, voice rumbling from the sheer pain.

“Trying to be clever?” Obviously he touched a sore spot, judging by the guys face.

  
“Pretty sure I am.” Louis says, before he knees the guy in the crotch. He lets go of Louis, who falls to the floor on his knees. He tries to get up but gets sent down by strong arms on his back. He tries freeing himself. The man sits up on his fours to jump at Louis, his jump is interrupted by the collisions with a blue-shirted man. He gets pushed to the ground, and a black knee pushes him down. Louis wants to rip free to thank the guy currently crushing his aggressor. 

Surprisingly the man turns around, “stay down. We don’t want to hurt you.” Louis blinks back taking in the entire outfit of the man. _Shit._ Louis has the time to think, before he lets himself be pushed to the ground. Cuffs lock around his wrists.

He’s taken to a large silvery van. Protestors and Escorts are seated across from each other, “oh God I’m going to die if my parents find out about this!” Perrie whines. 

“Look at the upside, being gay won’t be a big deal in comparison.” Jade smiles. 

“This is absurd, I was only protecting someone.” Louis fights back against the police officers holding on to his arms, easily they throw him in the van. Louis slips and falls into someone’s lap. Harry’s strong thighs feel like heaven under Louis bubble bum. Their faces are near inches apart, and Louis can feel his dick shift in interest. Arousal shoots through him when he feels Harry’s eyes glance down at his red cut lips. Harry shifts under Louis making Louis surprise a small gasp from the friction it gives to his bum. It also makes Louis slide off of his thighs and land to Harry’s right, further inside the van on the small bench. Their faces are still close to each other, and Louis can feel a curl tickle his sore jaw. Harry’s eyes are still glued to his lips and Louis breath hitches. Their foreheads brush against each other, when Harry tries to look away. Louis shifts so his legs are aligned with the others on the bench. Louis’ breath is still uneven, and it completely sets off when Jade suddenly lets out a whistle. A woman with large breasts is set down in front of her. 

“Hi, good-looking.” Jade playfully bites the air. 

The woman looks shocked, trying to shift herself further into the guy sitting next to her. She starts to pray, whispering “Satan be gone.” 

“Not Satan, just queer.” Jade giggles and bites Perrie shoulder, watching the woman playfully, who cries out. Louis chuckles and nuzzles his own nose into Harry’s shoulder, his body still leaning into his. He can feel Harry trying to pull away, which is difficult when you’re sitting in a police van like chickens in a barn. 

He leans up to look at Harry, who is trying very hard not to look at Louis himself. “Don’t pull away from me, love.” 

“Louis…” Harry mumbles, a goosebump running across his skin from the dash of hot air gliding down his neck. “You don’t want to do this, not here.” Louis breathes in a very long breath, inhaling the salty skin before pulling away. 

“Fine.” Harry turns to him the first time, his eyebrows are drawn together again in confusion. 

“Remove your shoes and any harmful objects, including watches, jewellery, wedding rings, eyeglasses and cell phones!” The booker in the police office says with a bored voice. “That’s a weird bunch Lando.” 

The police officer who brought them in, Lando, shrugs and grins “abortion clinic riot.” 

“Riot? It was a peaceful protest.” A guy with a cross defends. 

“Fock off,” Louis says. “Ye were groping one of us, and trying to beat me up!” He points to his rosy jaw.

“Shut up, all of you!” Lando says, “you all get one phone call. There’re the phones.” A line of phone-booths hang side by side ona grey wall. “Hope you all know your parents phone number by heart.” He snickers. Louis pulls a face.

“Where the fock are we? Ye kna in case our mums do pick up and try to get us!” Louis says.

“Cheshire Police Station, mate. There’s only one. She’ll know where to go, smart ass!” Lando turns to give them a bit of room. 

Louis approaches the phone and types in his home phone number. It rings, and he has a feeling no one will answer until a tiny voice breaks through “Tomlinson Home. How can I help you?”

“Daisy?” Louis asks reflectively.

“OH Louie!! Hi. Where are you?” The girl says. “It’s Phoebe by the way! I have to tell ye about this really cool new project at school, it’s this genealogy thing and mum said I can interview you and grandpa…” She babbles on, and Louis can see the time tick on the clock above him. 

“Pheebs!” Louis interrupts her. “I need t’ talk t’ mum, ‘ave ye seen her?” 

“Yeah, she’s around somewhere, hold on.” Phoebe says a little bitchy to her brothers indifference to her great story. “MUUUMMM!” He hears her roar through the house. Louis picks at the small separee separating him from Harry softly mumbling to his mother. Niall, on the other hand, seems to be ordering pizza.

“Hello?” Jay’s voice travels through the speaker.

“Mum!” Louis lets out a breath, relief filling him. He would never tell anyone, but he dreaded walking into the grey walled police station. It gives him the creeps, and he’d just wish his mother would pick him up, make him a cuppa and cuddle him on the sofa. “I need ye t’ come get me.” 

“Get ye? Don’t ye have a car?” She asks quietly, while going through the mail of the day. 

“I’m sort of too far away from it.” Louis says, starting to peel off the sticker glued to the side of the phone. 

“Far away?” Jay asks, amusement colouring her voice.

“Yeah, I’m not sure how far away.” Louis says. He’s not sure where exactly the police station is, but they were on a fifteen-minute drive, so fair to say pretty far.

“Louis, speak!” Jay laughs. _Oh boy, that’ll fall off her lips soon._

“I’m at the police station.” Louis says, slowly. 

“Excuse me?” Jay haters in everything she is doing, reflectively sliding her hand on top of her tummy.

“I was helping the escorts for the abortion clinic.” Louis says as quick as he can, so she can’t disrupt and only get half of the story. “…a protest started. They weren’t friendly, what ever they might say, they are definitely not friendly mum. Anyway the cops showed up and ta-da here I am.” 

“Oh my, Boo Bear.” She says, confusion and worry twirling together. 

“Just come get me please.” Louis says, embarrassment high. No matter how much trouble he’s been in, he’s never made her come to a police station to pick him up.

“I’ll try to get there soon, baby.” She says. 

“Cheers mummy.” Louis says lowly, so no one hears him say mummy. He hangs up to see Harry grin at him. “Shut it.” Harry lets out one of his goat chortles. “Ye order a pizza or somethin’?” Louis asks Niall, who is already leaning against the opposite of the wall, waiting. 

“Told my dad to pick up something to eat.” Niall shrugs. “I’m just hungry.” Louis and Harry laugh at the same time. 

“Alright, let’s move everyone.” Lando calls. 

“Where are we going?” Harry asks.

“Cells, kid. Line up, come on.” Lando waves his hand. They line up to walk to the cells. They all file into a cell, “wait!” Lando stops Harry by grabbing his shoulder, “you file out.”

“What?” Louis can hear the slight panic rise in Harry’s voice. “Where am I going?” 

“Flight risk, we’re taking you somewhere else.” Lando grins. That’s the problem with cops. They enjoy making others feel uncomfortable and love to abuse their power to feel just a tiny bit powerful themselves. Even if it only lasts a few minutes. “You!” Lando says, interrupting the ramble inside Louis’ mind. “Join him.” Lando grabs Louis arm and pulls him out of the group toward Harry and a police woman. They all get pushed into different directions. 

“Flight risk? Tha’ makes no sense.” Louis argues.

“You were the ring leaders!” The woman says, opening a cell and making a hand move to make them go inside. Louis throws his head into his neck and groans loudly, before stepping behind bars. There’s a small single bed dressed in ratty old sheets. Harry steps in beside him, and quickly dashes the two steps to the wall opposite the bed to lean against it.

Louis rolls his eyes and sits down on the wobbly bed. “Why is it so hot in here?”

“The radiator is broken.” The woman officer says.

“Can’t ye put on the AC?”

“No.” She says.

“Why not?” Harry asks.

“ ‘Cause we don’t have one.” She laughs at their horrified faces. The collar of their shirts already deepening in colour. The locks click close, and she walks off whistling to herself. 

“Sit down Harold.” Louis says.

“Nope.” Harry stays standing on his two long legs, which look so sinful in those tight black jeans. 

“Oh, Curly.” Louis shakes his head. “I can sit on one end and ye on the other. Imaginary line.” Louis whips his hand back and forth marking the line.

“You’re just going to pry on me again.” Harry says to his hands he’s staring at.

Louis laughs, and leans backwards to lie flat on his back. His shirt rises up his stomach. Harry’s breath hitches, and he quickly grabs the hem to push it over his tummy again. His head lying on top of his arm. “What?” Louis asks sharply, turning to stare at Harry.

“I didn’t say anything.” Harry says, raising his arms.

“Ye think too loud.” Louis says, watching while Harry fumbles with his hands. It’s weird seeing the hands without the rings. The pads of his finger rubbing over the skin which used to have the comforting pressure of rings. Something which grounds him, without them, he feels… naked.

“Do you want to play a game?” Harry asks, his hands drop to the side.

“What kind of game?” Louis asks, interests peaked.

Harry shrugs, “an alphabet game.” Louis laughs involuntarily. He does those games with his sisters when they are being whiney during a long car ride or dinner. “List football clubs alphabetically.” 

Louis sits up, “Arsenal.”

“Hm…” Harry mumbles, taking his bottom between his thumb and index finger. Eyebrows locked together while thinking. 

“Already lost, Curly?” Louis grins and scoots to the edge of the bed. Harry looks up. 

“Bayern Munich!” He says.

“Would have gone with Borussia Dortmund, but fine.” Louis shrugs. “Chelsea.” He adds fast and stands up to stand in front of the other boy. Harry nervously bites down on his lip and wipes at his temple to dab away some sweat building there. 

“Doncaster Rovers.” Harry says, breath hitching while Louis takes one step closer.

“Everton.” Louis grins while Harry takes his step back again, back colliding with the wall behind him. Louis’ right hand comes up to swipe the fringe to the side, it’s a little wet already, beads of sweat glistering on his forehead. 

“Fulham.” Harry slurs the name. His eyes trained on Louis’ left hip. “Yo…Your turn.” Harry stumbles.

Louis takes one last step, the tip of Harry’s Chelsea boot brushing against his vans. “Genoa.” 

“In…eh…in Italy?” Harry whispers, looking at the two toes touching each other. 

“Correct Harold.” Louis smiles, his breath travelling along his face. One of his hands sneaks on Harry’s left hip, circling his thumb over the soft material.Harry’s shirt was cut low. Louis watches while one of Harry’s droplets of sweat moves over his left peck, down his midriff, disappearing into the shirt completely. Louis’ right hand reaches for the exposed skin, his thumb coming in contact with the soft skin there to brush the second droplet away. Harry takes a deep breath in. Louis chuckles slightly. He brushes his fingertips up his neck and pushed his hair back with both his hands as if he wanted to pull them in a ponytail, his arms remaining around his neck. 

The locks feel amazing in his hands. Harry’s hands fidget at their sides. “Ye can touch me.” Louis whispers against his ear. Harry’s breathing quickens when Louis lips touch the side of his neck. The throbbing under his thin skin grows stronger. Louis chuckles against the skin again. 

“Lou, please.” Harry says, breathlessly. Louis put his flat tongue over his pulse, and licks the salty, sweaty neck up to stop at his jaw. Harry shivered when Louis’ teeth break into a skin a bit. Louis bend his right knee and pushed them in-between Harry’s knees, bumping the thighs until Harry spread them for him.

“Please what?” Louis says against the junction of jaw. Trailing a few kisses across his jaw. 

“Stop.” He whispers, his voice going smaller and quieter. “I don’t think this is a good idea.” Louis doesn’t care. He opens his mouth over Harry’s quickening pulse, lets his tongue dance over the skin there, and suck in the skin. His mouth forms an O, and he sucks harder, his teeth resisting against the new penetration. Harry moans.

He pops off, “I want yer hands on me, Harry.” 

“Can’t.” Harry says, while Louis’ fingertips scratch against his scalp. “Not a good idea.” 

Louis kisses his jaw and his ear and his cheek “What are ye thinkin’ about?” He whispersagainst his lips. Standing far away enough, so their lips don’t touch. His hands are getting sweaty from the warm hair he’s holding with them. He kisses the corner of his lips. “Fuckin’ me?” Louis’ knees pop up to brush against Harry’s crotch. “Definitely about fuckin’ me. Yer so hard for me baby.” He moves his knee back and forth a bit, rolling the balls slightly in the tight briefs he has. The hard rod in its prism twitches, “ye look amazing in this shirt, love. I’m glad we’re alone, ‘cause all I can think is filthy things.” 

Harry dugs his head, nudging upwards to catch Louis’ lips. Louis moans lowly. Their lips smack apart again with a wet squish sound. “Harry…” Louis moans before attacking Harry’s lips again. Lips parting quickly, Harry’s tongue hesitates at the seam of Louis’ lips. Louis tugs at his hair, Harry’s mouth falls open completely with a deep moan running through Louis’ bones. He takes charge and slips his own against Harry’s, pressing it back into his mouth. Their tongues dance together. Harry’s low moans reach Louis’ ears. His knee relentlessly rubs Harry’s hardness.

Harry hums, while his hips try to snap forward, his skinny hip knocking against Louis’. Finally, his long fingers grab for Louis, his finger-tips pressing into Louis love handles. His fingers slip inside his t-shirt, fingers exploring his back. Louis keens. Their lips detach. “Finally found me skin, aye?” 

He kisses him, but Harry dugs his head a bit, “will you let me see your tummy?” Louis raises his eyebrow and tugs harshly on the curls tangled between his own fingers.

“Stop with tha’ shit.” Louis complains, before planting another kiss on his lips. He pushes his knee against his balls some more, making Harry arch his back.

“Please Lou.” He moans long and loud. 

“SHUT UP!” Someone in another cell screams. Louis chuckles against Harry’s skin. Lets his hair go with one of his hands to brush it across his nipple and down his side. He pops the button and pushes his hand into his brief. 

“Wearing briefs this time?“ Louis jokes, brushing their noses against each other. Harry’s eyes bore into Louis’, while he starts moving his hand up and down that glorious length. “I dream about yer cock, babe.” He kisses him again, his tongue bucking into a nice curve to touch Harry’s bottom lip just in the slightest. 

“Oh Lou… mph….” Harry moans, his hip furiously snapping forward into his hand. 

“Don’t even have t’ move me hand, do I? Yer doin’ all the work by yer own.” Louis chuckles, tugging at the curls some more. 

“Hurry up, please.” Harry whispers into the air, his neck long and tempting. A Hickey is already forming, Louis kisses it. Getting him off at this angle is awkward, and he can feel his own hand cramping up. “Lou… oh… please… I… fu—…“ Louis speed up and looks at him straight in the face. He wants to see when he comes. “I’m going to…” Louis smiles when he slots their noses against each other again. 

“Go on… baby.” Harry speeds up his thrusts into Louis’ hand. Harry’s bottom glistering lip wobbles when he bites down on it to moan. Louis’ hand fills with Harry’s come. He steps on his tip toes to kiss him under his left green eye. “Well done, Curly.” He retracts his hand from the cock going soft. 

“I didn’t want this to happen.” Harry says, eyes trained on Louis chin. 

“I kna.” Louis nods. He pulls at his hair again to make him stare at his eyes finally. “But it did. I enjoyed it.” 

“You didn’t even get to come.” Harry says disorientated. His hands retract from Louis’ body to zip himself up again. 

“It’s enough to see ye fall apart for me.” Louis whispers, and plants a kiss on his lips. Harry tsks and brushes Louis’ arms from his hair. He rubs his neck, trying to get rid of the sweat pooling there. “Oh Harry.” Louis rubs his hand over the bedsheet. Harry’s nose scrunches up in disgust. “Why won’t ye believe me?” 

The door buzzes, the police woman reappears, “your mothers are here.” She unlocks the cell and makes a motion for them to exit. 

“Oh Louis!” Jay takes her son into her arm, before releasing him with an upturned nose. “Ew…why are ye so wet, boo?” 

“Cops radiator is broken. Sweatin’ me balls off.” Louis responds. 

“Language.” She weakly replies, swiping his wet fringe. “Oh honey, what did ye do?” 

“Mrs. Deakin, Mr. Tomlinson, a word please.” Lando is back. He takes them to a small window to have a talk. Meanwhile, Harry in Anne’s arms, Niall’s in his fathers and Liam in Karen’s are all allowed to leave.

“Come on lovey, let’s go.” Anne shuffles her son backwards.

“Mum, what’s going on?” Harry asks.

“Harry…” She says, tiredly.

“Mum, why isn’t he coming with us?” Harry sounds more desperate now. His eyes glued to Louis, whose hands are fidgeting at his side, while one of the cops is talking to him and his mother. Anne shuffles him through the police entrance. 

“He’s not a minor my love.” Anne says while she helps her son to the car, he’s still walking backwards.

“Are they charging him?” Harry sounds petrified when his bum collides with the car door.

“I don’t know darling.” She pushes him into the car seat. Harry is still looking out the window when Anne buckles herself in.

“It’s my fault. I made him come.” Harry says, looking down at his rings, he’s happy to have it back in around his fingers. He starts twisting one of them on his middle finger. Anne chuckles lightly to herself. “Why are you laughing?” Harry cries.

“I’m sorry honey, but your face.” Anne caresses Harry’s cheek with a small smile on her face. “You’re just so into him.” 

Harry pulls a face of annoyance, “I’m not!” 

“Oh sweetie, I’m your mum.” She giggles when she starts the car. Harry crosses his arms in front of himself and pouts. 

💚🍑💙

“Got this new toothpaste that tastes like sulphur.” Louis says to Liam, just as they walk towards the science hall. “Honest, the worst taste ever. Me dentist told me I need a paste to strengthen me gums, so me mum bought me this toothpaste. Thought I was dying.”

Liam laughs, “Really, Louis? That’s the dumbest thing I have heard you say.” 

“Louis! Louis!” Louis gets turned around by a pair of lanky hands. He stares down at Harry, who is leaning forward holding his stomach. 

“Ye okay there, Styles?” Louis asks, unable to keep the fondness from filling his voice.

“Are you going to be okay?” Harry asks, straightening again, “I saw you getting separated from the group and… are they charging you?”

“What is it with ye and all these questions, Harold?” Louis mocks him. His phone hadn’t stopped buzzing the entire day yesterday, since his visit at the police station. 

“You never give me a straight answer.” Harry says, his bottom lip jutting out. 

“Watch out Harry, you’re about to whine like a pet.” Louis snickers. He’s right, of course, Louis evaded his questions just edging him on. Deep down he hoped Harry would have to find him and talk to him personally to get the answer, and looking at Harry now, Louis was right.

Liam rams his elbow into his side. “Louis only got a warning.” 

“Oi!” Louis shoves Liam back, “shut it.” Liam rolls his eyes. 

“A warning?” Harry sounds confused. 

“Yeah,” Louis says. “They warned me, I’m of age and that me mum can’t save me bum no more. Hitting people ain’t a solution… bla bla bla. All very boring. They wanted to charge me, but it’s one word against another.” Louis shrugs. “They had to let me go.”

“Oh, thank God… I thought you were getting in trouble… and all ‘cause of me.” Harry says.

Louis can’t be blamed for the way his mouth morphs into a grin. “Ye didn’t force me to hit the lad.” 

“You only did it… well… for me.” Harry brushes his curls back, and his cheeks go pink. It’s almost cute how his nervous eyes flicker over to Liam. “At least… that’s… that’s what I thought.” 

Louis grins at Liam, who rolls his eyes and shifts uncomfortable, “I’ll get to class. See you later Tommo. Bye Haz.” Harry is still ducking his head when he waves. 

“I already beat a lad for ye, Styles.” Louis gets back on topic.

“I know.” Harry looks up again, his expression unreadable. 

“I do ‘ave t’ say I really didn’t like the way he was touchin’ ye.” Louis admits. The bell rings and the hallway grows quiet. 

“Cheers. Very gentleman of you.” Harry smiles, his eyes crinkling. 

“He didn’t hurt ye right?” Louis asks. 

“No.” Harry says, his smile faltering a bit. “Just uncomfortable you know? When someone enters your space so much.” 

“No one should ever do somethin’ like that t’ ye again.” Louis says, stepping closer to Harry. His index finger slides over the back of Harry’s hand, tracing a popping vein there. 

“HEY!” Louis turns around, the pit of his stomach growing cold. _No one can see me hand right? No one can see me touchin’ his hand?_ “Don’t you have class?” The teacher calls. 

Louis winks at Harry, before running off to get to Biology. 

The weather is getting worse, it’s getting cold and wet. The few horses who are outside have heavy blanket-like body tarps hugging their bulging bodies. Louis thinks about stealing one of them, but decides they stay much longer out in the cold then he himself. 

“Oi, Oi, Max!” Louis says, calling over to Max who was brushing a black horse.

Max turned around, “hey Louis! What are you doing here?”

“Can’t I visit me girlfriend.” 

Max raises an eyebrow, “you don’t come around much. And she’s your beard at best.”

“Yeah, totally… where is she?” Louis asked, ignoring the confusing word beard. 

“She’s riding.”

“Don’t ye usually join ‘er?” Louis asks, while he gets closer to the enormous animal. 

“Yeah… but she’s doing some stories thing, and she doesn’t want me to be seen on it. Something about not wanting to raise infidelity issues.” Max says tossing his hair. It has gotten long, it looks like a large dog-like helmet. 

“Sorry about tha’.” Louis smiles, “I really don’t mind.” 

“Don’t mind?” Max puts down the brush to grab the blanket. “I never really understood why you, of all people, needed a beard.” 

Louis shakes his head, _what the fock does tha’ mean?_ “Do ye ever think about comin’ clean?” 

“What do you mean?” Max motions for Louis to help him drape the animal, which shifts on his hooves. 

“Givin’ up this charade! Throwin’ it all t’ the wind. Make her yer own.” Louis says. 

“Louis, I’d love that. It’s not me who you’d have to convince it’s her and her parents. She’s terrified they’d cast her out.” Max straps the blanket lightly around the animal. “There you are.” He pats the animal on it’s rear. 

Louis quickly steps back again, _I’m not afraid alright. They’re just huge!_ “But ye’d be open to it?”

“Mate, it’s all I ever wanted.” Max says.

“Ye sound like me sister before Christmas.” Louis grins. Max only laughs at him. “Can ye tell her I was here? I got t’ get t’ work.” 

“I’ll tell her to stop by, how about that?” Max smiles. 

“She sure could use some chips.” Louis winks and zigzags around three large horses. 

“Think about it El, it’s been long enough.” Louis argues, while he sucks on his cigarette bud. It’s almost completely burned down, but it helps him stay calm.

“Louis! We had an agreement!” Eleanor says, crossing her arms over her boobs.

“Yes, but we never said how long it is for.” Louis argues.

“It’s because of Harry, isn’t it? First I can’t kiss you any more and now he wants you to break up.” Eleanor shakes her head, looking down the street, as if she could see Harry standing there.

“No. This is something I want.” Louis says. “I intend to show Harry how much I want him, and I think two relationships is just too much to handle.” 

“Well, I don’t want to.” She deflates, “not yet.” 

“Okay.” Louis says, “we can still wait a while. But this is coming t’ an end, ye should prepare for tha’. And I will help ye with yer family.” She nods and reaches out to crush her taller body against his. The angle is a bit awkward, and Louis arm starts to ache after a while. 

“So when’s your next game?” El asks, once she has to wind herself out of the embrace again. 

“Tomorrow.” Louis laughs, when she pulls a face. 

“Sorry, I haven’t been there.” El looks apologetic, it soothes Louis’ ego.

“Not really a problem, I’ve got plenty of people watchin’ me.” He snickers. 

“I know.” She smiles and reaches out to light a cigarette for herself. “Some people think your bum is the main show. Watching it jiggle and jump in those tight pants of yours.” 

“I kna,” Louis chuckles, turning his bum to face her and jiggles it. 

Eleanor laughs, but abruptly stops as soon as Louis turns around again. Her hand reaches out and tugs at the hem of his shirt. Her hands reach out and pat his tummy, “oh Louis, how is it possible you still have a tummy? Don’t you use any of our diets?” She sounds so disappointed. 

Louis brushes away her hand and mumbles to himself “I don’t think he minds.” He tucks on his shirt. _Harry said he didn’t mind_ _me little tummy_ , at least that’s what it felt like to Louis. “I don’t like yer diets.” 

“It was worse than a uni-brow, it went all the way into his hair.” Harry uses his index finger to show the extent of the uni-brow, which travelled far over the temple, he is talking about. 

Niall barks a laugh, “sounds like a bad date.”

“Wasn’t a date Niall.”Harry says, like they have had these discussion multiple times, his eyes nervously shift to Louis. 

Louis bites down on his sandwich, clenching his jaw together so hard he can feel the teeth crunching against each other. _How dare anyone else touch his beautiful body?_ “Why were ye there then?” 

“I was just taking some pictures.” Harry says, his cheeks colouring up. “He happened to be the curator.” 

“I thought ye only do flowers and landscapes?” Louis asks.

“My show is in March. I’m getting really worried I don’t have enough.” Harry says, re-arranging the salad on his sandwich. 

“You’ll be great.” Zayn says, giving Harry an approving nod. There’s no food in front of him, and he’s leaning into Liam.

“Cheers.” Harry gives him a smile, releasing a loud breath out of his mouth.

“Ye saw his pictures?“ Louis asks Zayn. 

“You haven’t?” Zayn asks, eyebrows raised in alarm.

“Nah.” Louis shakes his head and rips another piece of off his sandwich. “Haven’t had the chance.” 

“You really should.” Zayn says. “You’ll be fine, Haz. Your pictures are great. Are you adding the ones with Danielle as the model?” 

Harry shakes his curls, “no. They didn’t turn out as good as I had hoped.” He pouts accusatorial at his salad.

“Need a new model then?” Zayn asks, wiggling his eyebrows. 

“I think it might just not be my style.” Harry says. _I’d model for ye, babe._ Louis dreams of sitting on Harry’s dark rose bedsheets or in them, preferably naked, while Harry takes pictures of him. He can feel himself twitch in interest. 

Louis silently continues eating his sandwich, lost in thought until a foot nudges his toe. He looks up to see Harry giving him a are-you-okay-look. Louis tries to force a smile and rubs his foot against his. His heart flutters, he’s still not got the organ under control. “Hi.” A meal tray clutters down next to him. Eleanor’s heavy perfume invades his nose, Louis almost sneezes. “So I was thinking, I could wear your jersey to the game tonight.” 

“My football gear?” Louis asks.

“Yeah, that’s what I said right?” El looks at him a little confused. Louis is looking past her at Harry. He’s looking down, so his curls hide his face. _Bloody hell, how am I supposed to knaw how ye feel when ye won’t look at me?_ “You do have to right? So I can wear one?” Harry’s foot retracts again. 

“Yeah sure.” Louis nods. “I suppose it’ll fit ye.” He smiles, when she pokes his cheek. She looks down at his sandwich. “Maybe you should give your other half to Zayn. You really don’t need to eat that many calories.” She tsks.

“El!” Louis moans. “Leave Zayn alone.” He’s unsure why he’s defending Zayn all of the sudden, but it feels wrong to point out the obvious eating issues he has right now. He stares up at her. 

She holds up her hands, “just want you to stay sexy babe.” She gives him a quick kiss to the cheek and heads to her friends. Louis pulls a face, _we talked about this!,_ and rubs his cheek to erase the traces of the kiss. Harry has started looking at him again, the curls still covering most of his face, but his eyes travel across Louis’ face. “Sorry Zayn.” Louis says.

“It’s fine.” Zayn lies. He shifted away from Liam, discomfort written all over his face. Liam snakes an arm around Zayn and places his hand over his heart, tapping it a few times. Zayn melts into the embrace, looking up to grin at Louis. 

Niall and Louis stand up at the same time to head out. The other three boys follow them. “I’ll model for ye.” Louis smiles at Harry while he bumps their hips together. Harry loses his balance a bit, tumbling into Niall. 

“Didn’t think you’d be interested.” Harry says, looking at Zayn and Liam walking in front of them. They’re still linked through the arms around each other’s neck.

“If I offered to cook for you in lingerie and heels, what would you say?” Louis says, _course I wouldn’t! I’m pretty sure tha’s more Harry’s style._ Nonetheless, Harry’s large feet halter a moment. Louis stops with him, staring up at green deep eyes, slightly dilated. Louis grins. “Tha’ really a fantasy of yers?” 

“N-No…” Harry stutters, before he starts walking again. His long legs carry him quite quickly to the other three boys. Niall hadn’t noticed they were missing, because Barbara had caught up with them, she’s pressing her long fingernails into his hip while she cuddles into his side.

“Stop walkin’ this fast.” Louis whines, trying to run next to Harry’s large feet. “Styles!” Harry looks at him, before taking pity and slowing down for Louis. Louis lets down a breath, _God damn those long legs, it’s such a shame he can’t wear his tight pants at school. The uniform really ain’t given him much justice._

“It’s not, okay?” Harry says, his face is bright red. The others have disappeared from view, so far ahead they already followed the hallway to the left.

“I kna…” Louis says, rubbing Harry’s bicep. “I kna ye would rather wear them yerself, Harry.” Harry stops walking and stares down at him. Louis can see the others again, Harry stopped right in the corner.

“Take it back.” Harry says, his voice trembling. 

“No.” Louis says. “I kna ye Haz. Ye like dressing up, and I’d love t’ see ye in them too.” Harry bites his bottom lip, staring at Louis lips. Louis blood boils in anticipation. “Kiss me, Harry.” He whispers. Harry’s eyes flicker up to Louis’ and back down to his lips.

“I can’t.” He breathes across Louis lips. A cold chill runs through Louis spine. 

“Oh shut up.” Louis says too loud, grabs Harry’s tie and smashes their lips together. He mules into the kiss, lips vibrating against Harry’s from the small moan ripping through him. Like on autopilot, Harry’s hands grab for Louis’ hips. Louis is tippling forward on his tip toes to crash his body further into Harry’s. Harry tries to pull away, but Louis still got a tight grip on the tie. Their lips slot apart for a moment.

“Lo-u…” Harry mumbles in between breaths. But Louis can feel the twitch against his thigh pressing into Harry’s crotch. 

“Okay, Okay… calm yer pants, big boy.” Harry moans from Louis words. He shoves him backwards, while assaulting his lips further. He detaches his lip to realise. Harry is uncomfortably wedged against a door. _Perfect!_ They stumble through it and end up in a stairwell. Louis attaches his lips to Harry’s long neck. He releases the tie to undue the top buttons and kisses him along his neck. 

He makes Harry spread his legs a little more, so he can circle his hips upward. Harry moans and it echos through the stairwell. Louis chuckles against the exposed collarbone. He sucks at it hard. 

“Hurry up.” Harry whines, hips shifting upward on their own accord.

“Ye just had to pick today of all days to wear yer shirts like proper button ups huh?” Louis says, while grabbing at the shirt to rip it out of the pants. Thankfully he didn’t button down the shirts. His hands room under his shirt, his hands tickling along his torso to give Harry a small squeeze to his love handles. “Just keep in mind I haven’t done this before, yeah?” 

“Wha-…?” Harry asks confused, while Louis unbuttons his pants. They fall unceremoniously down his long legs. Louis lowers himself on his knees, Harry looks turned on but also worried. Louis’ hand run from his hips down his thighs to caress the inside up to the incredible bulge in front of his eyes.

Louis bends forward and kisses a small red spot on Harry’s leg. He takes a shaky breath and his green eyes are so dilated Louis’ unsure if they’re still green at all. There is definitely movement in Harry’s tiny shorts and his own cock stiffened too. Louis apologises, “your incredibly beautiful!” 

Harry blinks at him for a moment whispering something which sounds like “thank you.” Harry’s dilated eyes are looking at Louis’ hands, which are needing at the inside of his thighs. Louis grabs Harry’s knee to gently expose the inside of his leg. His tiny briefs flag and his hard-on gets more exposed, standing upright between his outstretched legs. Louis gently massages the inside of his thigh. Curly’s cock twitches multiple times. Unable to resist and not waiting for Curly’s permission, with one hard tug Harry’s shorts come down his thighs. 

His cock slaps against his stomach and oh he’s big. A sizzling heat shoots up Louis’s spine, something he vaguely recognises as arousal. Louis has never seen Harry’s cock up close like this before. Harry’s stomach clenches from his own arousal. He’s big and hard, there is a small patch of dark curls at the base of his cock, diligently kept tidy. _It’s so bloody hot._

Louis locks eyes with Harry, who is watching him fascinated. “I’ve never…” Louis begins.And he means it, he is the one getting his cock sucked usually. He feels a coil of fear running through him and making his finger tremor for a moment. No one has ever interested him enough to want to return the favour, but this was Harry, his boy. His beautiful boy who deserves the world. 

“You don’t have to…” Harry’s eyes are dazed, and he’s biting his plush lips red. Louis smirks, _I’m doing this to him just by looking, what can I do with my mouth._ Curly’s cock twitches when Louis leans over him, his breath fanning over the cock head. He licks his lips and accidentally licks Harry’s skin. Salt and vinegar, just like his mouth. He gives him a few improvised licks to gain more of a taste. Harry’s harshly breathing already “Lou…” A crumpling moan later he finds his voice “you have to push the foreskin do-AWWE-n.” 

Louis chuckles when he uses his creamed up fingers to push down his foreskin, exposing his slit “I have one of my own, Haz. I know how it works.” Even though Harry is annoyed, he throws his head back exposing his veiny neck in ecstasy. Louis can see his small scar on his chin from the beating he took and smirks again. “What do you want Hazza?” 

“Hm…?” 

“Tell me what you want.” 

Harry’s head shoots up again, staring down at Louis “your…your mouth” and with a second twitch to his cock he whispers an embarrassingly high-pitched “please”. Louis smiles at him, _good boy always so polite_ , his mouth surrounds his cock giving it a tentative suck. Harry’s pushes his hips up. Louis grabs his hips forcibly, there is going to be some fingerprints on him later and pushes them down. 

“Nah, nah, nah,” he tsk’s waving his index finger in front of him. “None of that Harold, be good or you don’t get any.” Harry moans with his lips clinched together making a thin line. He nods clenching his eyes shut tightly. Louis snickers “you like to be manhandled baby?” Harry’s eyes open in confusion. “Ah, I get it more the submissive streak.” Harry nods unexpectedly with his curls bouncing around his face. Louis curls his tongue around his tip and Harry’s breathing becomes erratic. Careful not to use too much teeth he finally deep throats for the first time. He coughs around the intrusion.

“Oh fuck…” Harry moans loudly. Louis can feel the heavy cock inside his mouth. It’s clogging up his air supply and sooner than later he can feel himself cough. He releases Harry’s dick and comes up to breathe better. “Sorry.” Harry moans, staring down at Louis’ spit running down his chin. 

“Sorry, I can’t deep throat yet.” Louis says, still breathing harshly. He places a few kisses along his cock.

“You're doing great, for a first timer.” Harry says, breathing erratic. “Can I put my hands in your hair?” 

“Yeah, sure.” Louis smiles before sucking the dick back into his mouth, letting it rest halfway in to suck hard. One of Harry’s hands rubs into his fringe, pulling his hair back. Their eyes lock and a small smile spreads of Harry’s face. He watches Louis’ cheeks hallow while he sucks on him like Popsicle. 

“Touch my balls, please.” Harry moans. _Right, I like that too._ Louis reaches his free hand up to rub his balls in his hand. “Feels so good, Lou.” Louis hums in appreciation, his own cock painfully straining against his sipper. Harry bucks from the vibration around him. 

“Fuck…sorry.” He apologises for the gurgling sounds coming from the back of Louis’ throat. Louis just stays deep for a few breaths, rubbing the balls simultaneously. Spit rolls out of his mouth, over Harry’s sack and onto Louis fingers. Louis lets them trail down towards Harry hole. With a slick up finger, he brushes over Harry’s pucker. Harry’s cock twitches inside his mouth. He does it harder, while he sucks as hard as he can. Harry looks so beautiful with his head fallen against the wall, his lips puffy and slippery, and his hips bucked forward to reach Louis as best as he can.

When Louis’ fingernail catches on the rim, Harry gives off a moaning sound as a warning before his six-pack contracts, and he’s coming all over Louis mouth. Louis sputters, he’s never had this much cum in his mouth and it runs down his chin and spatters over his cheek. “Oh shit, Oh shit, are you okay?” Harry asks, breathless. 

“Tha’ was a lot.” Louis giggles while rubbing his chin. Harry reaches down to swipe his cheek freeing it of come. Louis redresses Harry with a soft hand. Harry helps him back to his feet. He ignores the strain in his pants and watches Harry re-button his shirt. “So… ye comin’ to me game tonight?” 

“I dunno.” Harry adjusts his tie.

“What if I say please.” Harry shrugs again. “How about I tell ye we can do this again.” Louis grabs his belt loop and lets Harry feel his straining cock. 

“Then no.” Harry says. Louis groans letting his head limp forward. Harry freezes up, suddenly spilling a question on his mind for the last half-hour, “why does she wear your jersey?” 

Louis’ head snaps up, “this is about the jersey? Hey, ye can ‘ave one too.” Harry’s lips go down into a frown.“Please come to me game and the party after.” 

“I’m not ready.” Harry says.

“Ready? The last time I told ye I wasn’t ready yet ye told me ye couldn’t wait for me to figure that shit out!” Louis says, his voice echoing in the stairwell, mocking him. 

“I’m not ready to be hurt again. I’m sorry.” Harry brushes past him to take two steps at a time. 

“I’ve been tryin’ t’ prove t’ ye how much I care.” Louis says, while he watches the small bum as it stays perky and non-jiggly from Harry’s fast get away. He feels tired and deflated when he lets himself fall against the wall and slide down. He breathes in shakily. 

Despite it being the last game this winter, Louis is not in the mood to play footie today. Harry’s hundredth ( _that’s what it feels like_ ) refusal took another huge toll on him. Spiritless he ties his cleats. Slips on his armband declaring him captain and uses some hairspray to fix his fringe. Niall shoots him worried glances, worried over the lifelessness of his captain, but Louis ignores them. 

_I feel so completely dismantled._

Running out on the pitch to warm up, he sees his sisters bundled under blankets on the bleachers. Next to Fizzy, Eleanor’s is excitedly wearing one of his Jerseys. No sign of Harry. “What’s wrong?” Niall asks him. 

“Nothin’. Harry’s not comin’?” Louis can’t help but ask. Niall shrugs. “Not much help, are ye?” Louis says. Niall frowns, but Louis is already turning his back on him.

“Don’t take it out on Niall.” Liam says, running up to him.

“I know.” Louis simply says, he wants to run over to coach, but he sees Zayn sitting on the bleachers wearing one of Liam’s shirts. He turns around to him, “what’s happening with ye and Zayn?”

“You choose now to ask me about it?” Liam asks.

“Didn’t really kna it was a hard thing to answer to be honest.” Louis chuckles. 

“We’re just hanging out again.” Liam says as if it weren’t a big deal. Louis lets it slide after Coach calls for them to prepare them one last time for their strategy.

The referee releases the game, kick off. The game starts aggressively, the Crusaders approach the game offensively and go hard without losing the ball. Theother team has problems adjusting to this at first. With a diagonally pass of over 40 feet from Niall, the ball sips through the air right in front of Ashton’s right foot. He tries to outsmart the defence, but one against four is too many, and he loses the ball.

One of the mid-fielders of the other team starts their first attack, with a strong long ball to one of their deep standing forward. He doesn’t try anything fancy and directly shoots at Steer, Crusader’s goalie. It’s an easy catch for him. Steer shoots a long shot toward Louis, who is waiting in mid-field. As he tries to go forward, someone kicks him in the heel. Louis lets himself fall dramatically, but the referee blows the whistle in favour of the other team. They outplay the Crusaders, and one of them takes agood shot from the 22-metre line, they score. 

The Crusaders hang their heads for a moment, but Winston screams from the sidelines to get back in the game. “Possession, circulate the ball!” Crusaders start using the field more, opening up the circle of players, and start having fun passing the ball back and forth. Louis ends up in the penalty box, he goes into panic, he can feel one of the defenders breathing down his neck and the other one is shielding his view on the goal. He takes a shot, even if he should know better. He aims for the long post, the goalie climbs into the air, but the ball rushes two meters past the long post. 

The other team is far more invested in a good defence, they got their goal they can sit and wait. Every counterattack imitated by Liam, Niall, Louis, Ashton or Calum are all blocked. The half time whistle rushes through Louis nerves, he’s sweating and his thighs burn. He didn’t even want to play in the first place and now he’s losing, he hates losing. 

Louis walks over to coach together with the team. There’s a cute guy waiting with him. Harry holds something out over the bleachers. Niall runs over to him and grabs the small plastic bowl. “Cheers, mate!” He can hear Niall call before running into their little huddle. “Curtesy of Styles.” Niall chuckles. Louis leans over the small bowl, Harry had cut up fruit into small handy pieces. Louis grabs one of the oranges and delicately presses his teeth into the fruit. It’s delicious,he savours the sweet refreshing juice running down his throat. 

“Tha’ really good.” He mumbles while chewing the fruit. Niall nods, even Ashton is eating calmly. Louis doesn’t dare look at Curly again, maybe he should though, just dare to sneak a tiny peek. He looks up to see Harry blinking at him, no expression evident, just a short bat of the lashes.

The second half starts with a head-butting, Liam falls to the floor. After a short deficit in the game, he has to be treated off the pitch. It’s just a small laceration, however blood still pools into a corner of his left eye. Calum takes the penalty, he plays it cool and crosses from the left. Louis takes the passed ball and dribbles past the penalty line. He won’t lose his chance to go in front of the goal and shoots. The velocity with which the rim of his toe shots the ball causes Louis to topple over, he loses his balance and his hip collides with the damp grass. GOAL!

Ashton collects Louis from the floor and hoist him on to his shoulder to cheer him on, Calum right next to him. _So they made up, how cute._ Louis giggles at his own thought. The other team is shaken, which does not leave them once they start the game again. The other team loses control one to many times. Around 70 minutes in, Niall flanks to Calum, who tries to header into the goal. It’s a little to easy for the goalkeeper, the ball pushes off of his hands. But there’s Ashton, he flies to the ground, sneaking the ball into the net with the tip of his toe. GOAL! 

The Crusaders win 2:1.It sets them up for the championships, now they won’t have a problem with other teams wining, they’ just qualified. 

💚🍑💙

Louis leaves the party early. Ashton’s house is buzzing, and Louis already made an ass of himself by dancing on a table. Eleanor had tricked him into snogging him on the couch, while Ashton was cheering them on. After he took a hit in the bathroom, smoking through the exhaust vent while being sprayed in the face by the shower head, Louis decided to leave.

Exhausted, he drives Liam home too, who agreed to leave with him. Louis had chosen to be the designated drunk driver and silently carried Liam into his bed and pulled most of his clothes off of him. He closed the door behind him just as Liam started snoring. On his tip toes he went down the staircase, but he heard a creep and smiled when he saw the end of a nightgown disappear behind a door. _So Karen stayed up waiting for her son to come home at 2 in the morning, how cute._ Louis giggled the entire drive home.

Unsurprisingly his parents did not wait up for him. He takes a shower, though, he slips and almost hits his head on the brink of the tub. He moans when he slips under the warm covers clad in his briefs and a warm jumper. He sighs contently with how warm he feels, when the short moment is interrupted by his phone blaring. Louis decides it’s too far away, still stuck in his jeans discarded on the floor. The person seems to be consistent and keeps calling and calling. On the fifth ring Louis cusses under his breath and leaves the warm sanctuary. “ ‘ello?” He says into the phone, voice already covered in sleep.

“BOO-Lou…” Harry’s deep rumble stutters through the phone.

“Jesus, Harry! Why are ye still up?” Louis mumbles, scratching his tummy under his jumper. 

“Bear boo…the boo bear of Lous.” Harry continues to mumble.

“Curly!?!” Louis whines, _God tha’ boy is drunk_. “Babe, are ye okay?” 

“Fine.” Harry says short.

“Where are ye? Do I need to come and get ye?” Louis asks, terrible scenarios crashing through his head. He tries to ignore the disgruntled rumble coming from his tummy. _What if he needs me? Poor baby?_

“I’m here.” Harry supplies unhelpfully.

“Here? Baby, ye need t’ tell me where here is!” Louis snickers.

“Here is here.” Harry burps silently. 

Louis rolls his eyes, “yeah, love. Specifics.” 

“Look out your window!” Harry says. Louis startles and walks over to his window, he pulls the curtain from the window. He sees him through the moon shining over the drive-in. Harry is perched against the small wall working as a fence line, his head is lulled back to stare up at the moon, his curls circling his pink face.

“Shit.” Louis whispers to himself and hangs up. He quickly rushes towards the front door. He gets a pair of loathers, pushing his feet into them and rushes over to Harry. “Haz… sweets… I’m here baby cakes.” 

“Lou-bear.” Harry giggles, his long fingers still hold on to the neck of a Gin bottle. 

“Where’d ye get this stuff?” He ponders and grips the bottle. Harry pulls it back against his chest, pouting at him. “Let go…” He warns, “Harry, let… let… let it go!” He frees it out of his clutches after a moment of push and pull. “Such a baby.” He says. 

“Heeyyy…” Harry whines loudly.

“Shhh…shhh…” Louis presses his hand over his mouth, “my parents, Harry. Get it together.” 

“Oh…” Harry’s eyes go wide, the green has dulled from the large round iris admitting to his intoxication. They move to the windows behind Louis head, and then he finally takes Louis’ state in. “Oh Lou! You look so soft and cuddly… look at you… so beautiful.” 

“Jesus Christ.” Louis moans and helps Harry up, throwing his arm around his neck.

“So lovely you are…” Harry says, Louis blushes and is thankful for the darkness hiding it. “Except when you are not!” The accusation cuts Louis through the heart, and he stumbles on the pavement. 

“Yer just drunk.” He says, more to himself than to Harry. 

“You… sucked me off… felt so good… and… mean… like when are you not… and so much… provocation.” Harry is mumbling to himself, while Louis stumbles up the stairs. The way Harry is dragging his feet, Louis fears Dan will stand in front of him in the next moment. Hands on his hips just staring down at him with his eyebrows drawn together. 

“I try not t’ make ye sad any more, baby.” Louis says, while Harry’s feet drag through his bedroom door. He throws him on to his bed. “Harry just put yerself under the covers, ye are so heavy. In a good way, promise.” Louis chuckles after Harry pouted and struck his tongue out at him. He rubs up and his head finally hits the pillow. Louis helps him remove his shirt and pants, “looks so lovely.“ Louis smiles, brushing a hand down Harry’s body. Louis gets two glasses of water from the kitchen. He finally snuggles in behind him, “can’t wait for ye to talk in yer sleep again, makes me feel all sorts of good.” Louis says into Harry’s chest.

“Not good.” Harry whines, almost asleep. “No… secret… my brain…you sucked me off.” Louis chuckles. Harry falls into a talkative sleep. He mumbles something of dancing pink ponies. Louis falls asleep with a smile on his lips, joining Harry in his weird dreams.

„What am I doing here?“ Harry asks, Louis can almost feel the ice-cold breath of fear in him. 

Louis stretched his arms over his head and came to a leaning position. „Ye came over bumblin’ about me sucking ye off. Had t’ lug yer big boney ass up here. Didn’t even have the decency to undress ... just face-planted and fell asleep ye big oaf. Mind telling me what ye came t’ say Curly?“ The nickname rolled off of Louis’ tongue. He could see Harry’s eyes grow bigger, and he scrambled to lift the covers. He was completely naked, safe for the dark briefs which were sporting a rather large erection. Louis eyed him, resting his cheek on his hand, his elbows digging into the lumpy mattress. He liked his lips seeing it. Long thin cock. Harry looked pained and hurled himself to the bedside table. He downs the water glass Louis had placed there the night before. Louis watches his back muscles flex during the notion. His hands itch to touch and caress the strength that hides there, _God Curly why do ye ‘ave t’ love the gym so much_. 

“Why were you home, didn’t you have this footie party or something?” Harry asks, placing the glass back into its original position.  


“Yeah, yeah, I went... was boring was all.“ Louis waves away the thought.

“You love footie parties.” Harry argues, his back hitting the mattress again. 

“I do Harold. But yer distracting from the question again.“ Harry blushes. “Curly, what were ye babbling about last night?“ Louis asks, hoping for a better answer than the mumbling he did last night. But Harry surges forward, giving Louis a very sloppy wet kiss with his motorboat lips. Louis didn’t even have time to kiss him back nor register the distinct taste of morning breath. 

Harry sits up on his knees and grabs Louis’ hips to manhandle him underneath himself. _And fine, maybe just maybe I’m also strainin’ from me morning wood_. Harry starts kissing down his naked chest. He wasn’t actually kissing, his lips were sucking huge round flecks onto his chest. He was biting hungrily on Louis’ skin. Louis watches him fascinated “this doesn’t constitute to talking Harold.” Louis moans. But Harry shuts him up by cupping his cock and giving him a small warning squeeze while he happily bites at Louis‘ happy trail. While he was sucking a rather large mark onto his hip, he gave him a couple slaps on the buttocks. Louis took it as a sign to lift his hips, so Harry could chuck the underwear off. 

It flies across the room when Harry finally gets the elastic material off of him. Warm puffy air hits his cock. _Fuck_! Harry’s lips surrounded the tip of his cock and his tongue swivelled around his crown. „Shit! Curly! Where’d ye learn tha’?“ Louis could feel Harry chuckle a response like a moan around his cock. The vibration goes through Louis’ entire body like an electric current which leaves him sizzling with arousal. _I really don’t want to knaw where he learned tha’!_ Louis sits up on his elbows looking down at those curls falling down encompassing Harry’s face like he was a fucking prince in a Disney film. “Ye been practising, princess?“ He really couldn’t help himself. 

Harry's hooded eyes look up at him, and he blinks twice while giving him an affirmative suck. Louis had to clench his jaw and moan through his nose. Harry’s eyes smile, the crinkles by his eyes make it evident. Harry uses his free hand and grabs his balls, rubbing them against each other as if they were his juggling balls shortly before he threw them in the air. Louis only had a short moment to enjoy the new motion when his middle finger pressed down on his sternum. And Louis can’t help himself but throw his head back and groan loudly. He almost sees God in that moment, hadn’t he seen a small jiggle that sent a wave of shock through him. His head shoots back up, and he kicks Harry into his side. “Louis, Louis!!! Are ye up? We wanna watch some telly!! Louis?“ Daisy and Phoebe are jiggling his doorknob vigorously, Louis thanks his past-self for locking the door last night. He wanted to save Harry the embarrassment of his mother walking in on him hangover in Louis bed, but he never imagined a blow job walk in. 

Harry detaches from Louis, and they both watch as it continued to wiggle. Harry looks back at Louis and just shrugs his shoulders. With a smirk on his face, he tentatively pulls down Louis foreskin, just to poke out his tongue and lap at his cock-head just like when the ice cram starts melting because of the sun. His tongue stuck out and caught the non-existing droplets before they could fall off the cone. Louis can’t help himself but moan again. The doorknob wiggled again “Louis? Please be up!?” Harry’s tongue finds Louis’ slit and tongues it until his mouth surrounds his own tongue, and he sucks. Those lips, built to cradle a cock, rubbing past his cock-head over and over again. 

Slurping sounds fill the room “Hazza please!” He doesn’t know what he is begging for. Is it for him to stop, so he could put the telly on for his sisters? That he wants him to stop, because someone was at the door? Just to make him come already? To stop teasing? But Harry seems to get the gist of his pleading as he finally opens his beautiful mouth and shove Louis’ cock all the way inside. He could feel himself getting pushed past the breaking point into the boy’s throat “Curly,” he moans. _Huh, no more gag reflex._

“Louis why is this door locked?” Louis flinches, almost coming down Harry’s throat just out of shock, meanwhile Harry gurgled from the sudden movement. 

“Sorry, sorry, sorry” Louis whispered. 

Harry takes his cock out and with a breathless hoarse voice he whispers “ ’t is ok. Distract her. I want you to come on my face.” _And ok! Seriously_? Harry swallows him back down his throat and starts bobbing, his curls bouncing as he reaches beneath Louis’ angled legs to diddle his balls. 

“Louis I can hear you. I know you’re home. Now why is yer door locked and why on earth aren’t you opening it?“ Louis was currently having problems to make any sound at all, but he sees Harry’s right eyebrow shoot up at him and heck if Louis can’t take directives. 

“Yeah....i...nhh...i ....mum....“ Harry’s eyes crinkle again. 

“Louis William Tomlinson! Open this door right now!!“ 

“Gimme a sec... yeah, love? Not dressed yet.“ _Did I call me mum love? Shit I’m fucked._ Which was true on more than one account. 

“Love?“ His mother echoed, _oh shit_. Harry bobs stopped to take him in and choke on his length. 

“Oh yer in trouble now son. Open up, or I’ll get Dan to break this door down.“ She says something to the girls while Harry lets up, just to take him deep again. 

„Harreh…“ Louis whisper-shouts. Harry gets the issue and gets off to wank him fast. The other hand travels up his torso to play with Louis’ nipple. Harry opens his mouth and sticks his tongue out just underneath the head. He is blinking at him expectingly, while giving the underside of his cock an encouraging tongue stroking. Louis could hear Dan come into the conversation, exclaiming he’s getting the wrench. Louis could only see Harry. Obscene, glassy green eyes, swollen lips and curly hair. 

With a finally “f-uuck!!!!!“ Louis comes. Harry jerks him through it, his come falls all over his face. Only a few drops hit his tongue. Louis is breathing hard when loud footsteps outside his room appear. “Shit. Hide yer face under the covers. Pretend yer sleepin’.“ Harry nods and does what he was told, while Louis was scrambles to get his sweats on. He unlocks the door and stares at his furious mum and Dan who is holding a wrench and a hammer in his hand. Louis snorted a laugh at Dan, “how was the hammer supposed to help?“ 

“Louis Tomlinson ye are in so much trouble young man. What were u thinking? Ye do not…!“ His mother raises an index finger.

„I...“ Louis tries to interject.

“I repeat not!“ Jay continues to say.

“…mum…“ Louis rolls his eyes.

“Lock yer door!” Jay finishes sternly.

“Then ye shouldn’t ‘ave given me a room with a lock then should ye have?“ 

“Are you out of your mind boy?“ Dan looks bewildered. Just as Louis thought the doctor was actually starting to understand his sass. 

“I have a guest mum. Please don’t make a scene.“ He points to the lump which was Harry. Vaguely he wonders if his mother could smell the sex in the room, which he feels lingering in his nostrils and knows was hardening all over Harry’s face. 

“Oh! A guest?“ A few curls were sticking out of the sheets. 

“I’m not sure I like this! You need to tell us when you have a girl over.” Dan whisper shouted, hunching over to look at the stranger in Louis’ bed, his demeanour making a 180. He was no longer the growling father, but an uncomfortable step-father flustered by having to talk about sex with his stepson. “Even if you’re…” Dan catches himself from saying _gay_ , glancing at Louis’ warning glare, “…you could have been up to anything.“ 

Louis looks over his shoulder, with those curls and his long body he presumes one could mistake Harry for a girl. “It’s a boy.“ He informed them. 

Both look at him bewildered before Jay turns to face Dan “I didn’t raise my boy like that Dan.“ 

“He’s still a boy. When I was that age, boy almighty...“ but he didn’t finish, Jay was killing him with a look. 

“Looks like ye might be sleepin’ on the couch tonight, mate.“ Louis let him in on the secret threat behind the look. His mother in a green morning coat was huddled overlooking between the three men Harry (though she didn’t know it was him) Louis and Dan, trying to exhume a sense of parental authority. It hit him for a moment how comical this was. Three adults huddled together talking about sex partners and etiquette of living together. 

But his distraction didn’t work too well “Oh ye shut it. He is entirely right. Why would ye lock yer door when ye have a boy“ she raised her index finger „over? I don’t like this Louis.“ She rubs her eyes tiredly. She has been taking more night-shifts, and they are exhausting the mother of five. 

“Dan” he whispers, looking back at the curls, hoping beyond hope Harry can’t hear them. He looks at his step-father meaningfully, hoping they conveyed his desperation “that’s Harry!“ 

“Oh,“ realisation hit and his eyes go wide. “Oohhh.“ 

“So what?“ Jay asked looking between the two. “I don’t see how this effects anything.“ 

But Dan was busy zoning his wife out as he looks into Louis eyes. „Everything alright then?“ 

“Yeah, yeah, going great. Just don’t wanna wake him t’, ye knaw, me stepdad holdin’ a hammer threatenin’ t’ roll him out a bed, ye know?“ His step-father’s lips quirked up quickly but it disappeared just as quick. 

“Now what’s that supposed to mean? I’m only helping your mum…“ Louis chuckles, and Dan can’t help himself but smile too. “You know that’s the first time you called me dad.”

“I did not.” Louis says offended.

“Yeah, you did.” Dan grins.

“What is going on?”Jay asks, throwing her hands in the air. She closes her eyes as a wind of nausea hits her.

“Shhh...“ Dan waves Jay off, who looked at him incredulous. “Let’s go puke, baby.” 

“Puke?” Louis asks, a little surprised at the sudden turn of events.

“Food poising last night.” Jay says, waving Louis off. “I’m not okay with this.” She points at the door. 

Dan rubs her back, he hisses to Louis “no funny business. And no more locked doors.”

“No worries already done tha’.” Louis laughs. 

Dan turns around, letting go of Jay and crowding him, “you have to tell her.” 

“What?” Louis hisses back, Jay is watching them with a hand over her lips. 

“You have to tell her, because I won’t have ‘the talk’ with you and you don’t want that either!” Dan warns before joining Jay. Louis groaned embarrassed, there’s no way Harry hadn’t heard that. "Common we have elsewhere to be“ Dan grabs Jay’s arm. 

“But…?“ He tares her down the hallway where Louis presumed his sisters were still waiting for telly time.

Louis shakes his head as he watches them leave, before closing the door again and slipping back into bed. He lifts the covers to see Harry grin at him, excited of what they had just gotten away with. His face is still covered in now dried cum. His cheeks are rosy from blushing or the heat beneath the sheet, Louis can’t tell, which is annoying, because he couldn’t tell if Harry had heard what was said. Louis grabs an old t-shirt from underneath the bed, _alright, so I might not be the best cleaner,_ and silently started to get the come off of Harry. He giggles and crunches up his nose like a kid that face planted a cake. Louis only shakes his head with fondness, he flings the shirt across the room „thanks curly!“ 

Harry looks confused „for what?“ 

Louis smiles and reaches beneath the covers to take a hold of Harry’s cock, _oh he’s soft again_ „for tha’.“ Harry bites his lip and nods. Louis could barely hide his disappointment that his parents had caused Harry to soften. 

„Sorry I couldn’t return the favour.“ Louis says.

Harry shrugs nonchalant, “couldn’t help myself, you were so desperate for it, got me really going.“ 

“What?“ Now Harry’s cheeks inflame, because of Louis for sure. “You came while giving me head?“ 

Harry turns away from him hiding his face in his hands, “Oh, oh ... is that bad?“

Louis got up just to fall on top of Harry’s stomach, prying his hands away from his face „tha’s so fucking hot Curly.“ Harry’s face was red as a fire-hydrant now, “That could get me goin’ again.“ Harry’s face turns from surprise to eagerness, “but we almost got caught once already, let’s reschedule alright?“ Harry nods, his curls bouncing on his own collarbone. Louis let Harry shower first and lets him borrow his favourite sweats, which were actually old ones from Harry he had stolen out of a wash basket while he was living with him. If Harry noticed he did not say, at least the pants fit him, the t-shirt he borrowed was entirely too small for him, though.

When they walked down the staircase to the living room, seven eyes plant on them. Harry sheepishly said, “g‘d mornin'!“ He looks at Louis, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, “I better call an Uber, then?“ He looks so hopeful, it breaks Louis to see him go without having had their chat. 

“No worries darling, Anne is already on her way.“ Jay says, cradling a cup of tea in her hand.

“Oh?“ Harry exhales.

“I took the liberty to call her, that alright love?“ Jay asks concerned. 

“Yeah…that's...fine.“ It looks like Harry was disappointed his mother was coming to pick him up and Louis felt the same. _Mum, you meant well, but bad timing_. 

“Guess ye ‘ave time for a tea then.“ Louis grabs his hand and tares him into the small kitchen. He boils water and goes to the cubby to pick out tea. 

„I...“ Harry starts, and when Louis turns around to him, he sees him fidget with the to small t-shirt. _Damn I can see his pleasure trail_. „I came over ‘cause I wanted to ask...“ he trails off, looking anywhere but at Louis. „Damn it!“ He scolds himself as he angrily rips at his curls, frustrated with his own inability to finally say what he wants. Louis watches him as he applies the dash of milk to his own tea. He puts two sugars into Harry’s and hands it over to him. Hopefully, he’ll stop ripping out those precious curls. Harry stares at him blankly as he takes the tea, as if he has forgotten they came to the kitchen for tea. Louis gives him time to sip and think. He didn’t want to push the boy. He himself treated him like shit. And then he had courted him, or at least tried to convey that, Louis needed Harry to say what was on his own mind for once. „I need you to not stop.“ _What_? „ Damn it, I’m really bad at this. Sorry.“ Louis could feel his frustration pores out of his pours and into the air like the alcohol smell before the shower. 

„Just try again, love.“ Louis said with his kindest timid soft voice he had, one which was almost exclusively reserved for the twins. 

Harry takes a deep breath and then hurls the words at Louis in such fast progression, Louis was sure he’d never heard the slow talking Harry talk so fast before. “I wanted you ever since that concert, even if you used me. I made you into this guy who’d protect me from all evils. In my mind you were the fantasy that held me upright. Whenever I was bullied, I imagined you coming to my rescue. When you came back into my life, you were such an ass. And still you were the one I wanted. Then you broke my heart and trampled on it. Let’s not even mention Eleanor. Only when I came back from summer, you wanted me like I was a piece of candy. And still I wanted you.“ 

Louis was getting antsy from all the I _wanted_ parts, „do you not want me now? Do I still have a chance?“ 

Harry’s head shoots up, finally, “I’m scared to be left alone when I need you the most. I can’t survive another mood shift of yours.You treat me like shit. I don’t want you if you’re not going to be open with me. I can’t be loved behind doors and fucked over in front of the world. I won’t love a dickhead. I won’t out you, and you don’t have to out yourself for me. But I can’t be with you one moment and then watch you mouth fuck Eleanor at a party.“ L _ove_? “Louis, I want you to make a choice: when you’re with me, you’re either in or out. But none of that bullshit in-between.“ Louis swallows hard around the forming lump in his throat.

„Honey, Anne is here.“ Jay said from the living room, worry written over her face as she saw the two boys staring at each other, both of them lost in their own way, both being drifted away from each other by different hurdles of emotion. And both of them were holding the tea cups like they were their Anchors. She wanted to grab both boys by their shoulders and scream don’t you see you’re each other’s True North. You’ll always find each other. But she couldn’t. That they had to figure out on their own.

“I‘ll be right out.“ Harry whispered almost inaudible. 

“Alright, love.“ She walked back to the font door where Anne was patiently waiting. 

“And?“ Anne asks.

“I don’t know Anne. The air in there is thick.“ Jay says. “They were so close for a while, I really thought they’d become friends again.”

“I think we both need to give our boys a shove.“ Anne watches her friends face and finally nods. Harry came into view when the two slot their finger together in a pinky promise. His curls are bouncing to the floor, his head hung sadly between his shoulders. 

“Bye Harry!!!“ The twins hug on his legs suddenly and Harry has to bend down to give both a kiss as he waves goodbye to the rest of the family. One last look towards the kitchen, he sees Louis watch him with a blank stare, _but was that a small smile? Maybe there is hope._

Louis watches Harry’s figure retreat out of his house, mulling his words over in his head. He thinks back on Liam’s plan, point 4: woo him like a _romcom_. He gets a great idea, with superhuman speed he runs up the stairs and grabs his laptop. The next two hours he is neck deep in recipes and candle-making ideas. Next up he runs into Fizzy’s room without knocking and starts printing an excessive amount of paper, she makes him promise to pay for the next set of ink. He waves her off uninterested.

He runs back downstairs and throws himself into an armchair, and declares “I have plans for a great date.”

“Lucky Eleanor.” Jay says, an eyebrow raised.

“Not her.” Louis says flat. He looks at Dan “I need the house tomorrow night…and ye” he points at his mother. “I need ye t’ get Anne t’ make Harry come over.”

“What? Ye can’t just boycott our house.” Jay shakes her head amused.

“Dan!” Louis gives him the best pointed look, trying to communicate we have a secret here.

Dan nods “fine. We’ll go to the zoo, Pheebs has been begging for it anyway. But you get the afternoon, not the night. And next Sunday, not this one. No funny business.”

"Yer agreeing to this?” Jay asks.

“Trust me.” Dan says to his wife with a mischievous smile of his own.

“Ye two are too much.” She says, still not really sure what to think.

💚🍑💙

Louis pouts at Liam, when he ends his ramble about his parents boycotting his romcom date. “He promised to do it next week.” Liam says disinterested from where he’s typing away at his computer. “Besides it gives you time for point 3: Get him gifts.”

“I already got him flowers and chocolates. I even sent over a few books me mum said were good.” Louis says. 

Liam shrugs, “tomorrow is another choir meet. We could go support him.” 

Louis bolts upright, from his position on Liam’s bed. Eleanor, who had been lying on top of him, claiming she’d be able to learn chemistry like this the best, fell to the floor. “I could get him a gift basket!” 

“Owa!” El complained.

“Whoops sorry, boo.” He helps her back on the bed. 

“Hey… eh… Lou…” She fights with her hair, tasselled by the fall. “About the break-up.” 

Liam’s hand freezes over the keyboard and Louis stays seated upright. “Yeah?” 

“I’m ready.” She says. “I want to break up.” 

“Oh okay. Great.” Louis grins. “Now?” 

Eleanor laughs and it breaks the awkward tension. Liam chuckles from the chair. “I thought we could have another fight in the open. Then start telling people we have been having problems. Fighting a lot. You got annoyed about me spending too much time at the horse show, and I got annoyed because you had no time with me any more. And then before Christmas break we break-up.” 

“Wow ye really thought this through.” Louis says.

She starts playing with her hair some more, before adding “you said you’d help me with my family. I thought the first Saturday of Christmas break, you could come over with Max, and we could all have a talk with my mum.” 

Louis exchanges a look with Liam, before adding “sure. Sounds like a plan.” He leans back again. His imagination goes through with him, when he thinks of decorating a Christmas tree with Harry. Watching the green eyes twinkle from the lights.

Harry has his hair in a half bun. It peeks through the deer-antlers he is wearing. The black outfit looks perfect on him, and if Harry weren’t singing right now he’d jump him. Harry opens his mouth, hands nervously crossed behind his back. 

“I don't ever ask you where you've been

And I don't feel the need to

Know who you're with

I can't even think straight but I can tell

You were just with her

And I'll still be a fool, I'm a fool for you

Just a little bit of your heart

Just a little bit of your heart

Just a little bit of your heart is all I want

Just a little bit of your heart

Just a little bit of your heart

Just a little bit is all I'm asking for….”

“He’s singing about you again.” Liam chuckles, looking at Louis. Louis frowns, staring down at carefully picked gifts in his basket. Lottie had helped him pick out the best, and he had been so giddy, knowing they’d be in Harry’s hands soon. He closes his eyes and tries to will away the pain in Harry’s words. He won’t let this song damper the giddiness of being a free man.

This time Louis waits for Harry in the parking lot. He’s clutching his small basket, and his feet feel frozen. “What’s wrong with you?” Liam asks.

“What? Nothing!” Louis says, squealing a bit.

“Oh my God, you are actually nervous.” Liam barks a laugh into the air, the white cloud rising out of his mouth. 

“Of course, I’m nervous Lyum.” Louis whines.

“You really like him.” Liam says like that was something to question.

“Yeah we covered that.” Louis turns his body a little more to Liam’s side his knuckles go white on the basket.

“I just never really seen it... I mean the crying yeah, but this is… he’s literally got you tongue-tied. All because of Harry?” Liam looks at Louis like he’s a creature he just figured out.

Louis is glaring, “you callin’ me weak?”

“Never.” Liam says, holding up his hand. “Here he comes," he quickly says, trying to weasel himself out of the situation. _This is not over tha’ little shit._

Harry comes out with Anne and his father, Des. Louis hasn’t seen them at a public location together, they look handsome and quite the couple. Louis wonders where Robin is. Des grabs his son who has shot over him in height by one head and presses a kiss to his cheek. It looks like he’s saying something. Harry’s cheeks are going blindingly red, and a smile of happiness spreads over his plush lips. Anne sees them first. Liam waves at her. Anne nudges her son and points to his friends. Des lets go of him, and Harry gets into a slow trot to reach them. “Hi” he says.

“Well done, mate. Really, really good performance. Bit sad.” Liam hugs him tight against the chest and Harry snickers a small thank you.

Liam finally lets him go again. “Good job. Ye sounded amazing and looked gorgeous!” Louis can feel his ears heating up.

“Thanks.” Harry stares down at the basket and cocks his head to the side “what’s this?”

“It’s for you!” Louis quickly wants to transfer the basket to Harry causing it to collide right into his midriff. Harry doesn’t say anything just stares down at it with inquisitive greens. There are some bath salts, tea and honey. “They said ye should drink hot milk with honey…” Louis starts explaining. “It’s good for yer vocal cords. This one,” he points at the honey “should be perfect for that. There’s a small smelling candle and a body lotion tha’ smells like vanilla. Do ye like vanilla?” Louis realises how childish and insecure the question sounds as soon as it left his mouth. Harry’s dimples deepen, though, so that’s a good sign.

“I love vanilla.” Harry says, he leaves out the part where Louis smells like vanilla and tobacco. He wonders if it was intentional of Louis to buy him something which smells like himself.

“Oh good,” Louis smiles. He realises giving over the basket was a mistake, his hands seem to have forgotten how to manage without it. They are grabbing at something in the air. “Ye stayin’ with yer dad now?” Louis asks, fear pummelling in him. _What about romcom date night?_

“Yeah… I am…. I think he missed the last performance, so he feels like he needs to overcompensate.” Harry shrugs. “I’ll be back home after my bakery shift on Sunday.” 

“Ye were amazing, though, yeah?” Louis takes a small step forward and his hand land right next to Harry’s on the basket. “Ye really are good H.” 

“Thanks.” A blush forms on his cheeks again and a careful proud twitch of a smile forms on his lips. 

He wants to continue seeing this cute thing, so Louis says “no really good. Ye should try out for X-Factor.” Harry barks another one of his goat laughs, his eyes crinkle and his nose scrunches up in a fond sneeze.

They are staring at each other now. Both with timid smiles on their lips. “Alright we ought to go. Have a great weekend Haz.” Liam says and grabs the back of Louis sweater. 

“Yeah ‘ave a good weekend, Haz.” Louis whispers and winks. Liam pulls him further and waves before turning them as they walk a little toward the car park. “What was tha’ for?” Louis whines, he already misses looking into the emerald.

“You have to leave him wanting more.” Liam grins, "I bet you my better nut that he’s still looking at us.”

“Yer better nut?” Louis laughs. He turns around. Harry is still looking at them, but only out of the corner of his eyes, he’s talking to his mother who is inspecting the gift basket. “He’s talking to his mum” Louis laughs while Liam pales. Louis leans forward, “better nut aye?” He smacks Liam in the balls with the outstretched hand. Liam whales and Louis takes off. His feet are flying over the pavement he’s not felt this happy in a long time. When he reaches his car, which he presumes is the safe zone and glances another chance at Harry who is looking right back at him. Louis smiles and waves before getting in the driver’s seat. _This was a good day_.

💚🍑💙

Harry walks up to the house with the book safely tucked under his arm. For the last few weeks, he has tried getting his driver’s licence for the motorcycle and the distance between Louis and his house would be great practice. He sees something flutter and walks around the large drive in to see candles aligned on the front door. He steps closer unsure if he should intrude, the last thing he wants to see is Louis make out with Eleanor. But a piece of paper is superglued to the first step, ‘This way Curly’ it says. _Curly? That’s me!_ He follows the sign-up the steps. On the door-matt is a small object. Harry grabs the key which says ‘Only for Harold to use’. His fingers start to shake. This is very sweet and romantic and worthy of a romcom, _am I sure this is for me?_ _But who else go by the name of Curly in the Tommo household?_

He unlocks the door and steps in. It smells good, like fresh chicken or tomato sauce or something. Harry steps closer and his mouth drops. The living area is dimmed, only candlelight is glittering over the floors showing Harry the way to the dining table. At the stove he sees none other than Louis whisking a wooden spoon in a frying pan. He looks different too. He’s wearing red pants, a white-red striped t-shirt, black glasses, no socks and suspenders. Without thinking Harry grabs his phone and snatches a picture of Louis. 

“Hi.” He finally says while putting the book down. 

Louis zips around, “Harry.” He says breathlessly. Harry looks good. Real good. He’s wearing a pair of fancy white trousers with blue writing on them, matched with a delicate black almost see-through t-shirt. His curls look nice and soft as they fall around his shoulders like a prince. “You look amazing.”

“Ah…thanks?” Harry says, playing with a ring.“Wha… What are you doing? Who is this for?” 

Louis contemplates if Harry is pulling his leg, “You, silly.” He walks over to him and ushers him to the table. _Shit the candles I didn’t want to burn down the house, now there not lit, I suck at this!_ He positions Harry, so he’s looking at the kitchen and can see Louis work at the stove “sit.” He pushes the chair into the hollow of Harry’s knees.

“Me?” Harry whispers to himself. 

“Do ye mind lightning the candles, didn’t want to burn down nothing.” He says while making gestures to return to his chicken.

Harry barks a laugh, “sure.” He still can’t believe this is all for him. He was mad at his mother for sending him over after a bakery shift. His feet hurt, he felt ugly and smelled like bread. She had insisted. Did she know? He had thought he’d give Louis something to look at if he’s going to do this, so he had freed his newest pair of pants from the closet and slipped them on. White trousers which were snug around his bum but didn’t show of thighs too much. The blue writing glistered words of ‘filth’. 

He watches Louis prepare the meal, and his hands itch to help Louis. “Here ye go.” Louis places the dish in the middle of the table, before sitting down across from him. 

“What is it Lou?” Harry asks, unable to hold down a smile. He watches Louis small hands drop the food unceremoniously on his plate.

“Sorry, I’ll get better at this.” Louis says, heat spreading into his cheeks.

“Better with time.” Harry says thoughtfully. “What great things did you make for us?” 

“Okay get this,” Louis harrumphs, “chicken stuffed with mozzarella, wrapped in Parma ham with a side of home made mash.” Louis grins at him. “Dig in.” He tries to motion for Harry to try. Harry’s tongue pokes out when the fork slowly travels to his mouth. Louis watches him, slip the food between his cherub lips. Harry’s eyes close for a moment, _shit is it not good?_ Louis quickly slips a fork of food into his mouth too. 

“Oh my God,” Louis giggles to himself. “It’s quiet good, isn’t it? That’s my first time not burning anything.” Louis cheers himself. Harry honks a laugh.

“It’s good, Lou. Thank you.” Harry giggles, “better than your pancakes.” Louis laughs from the memory of the burned lumps he had passed as pancakes.

“Yer not eatin’ this, ‘cause of solidarity, are ye? ‘cause tha’s what ye did with the pancakes.” Louis says, worriedly watching Harry zip over his chicken, some of the mozzarella curling out. 

“No. No.” Harry lets go of the knife to sneak a hand over Louis’. Louis’ traitorous heart skips a beat, but he’s not mad. He likes the feeling of the amok running butterflies in his tummy. “It’s great, Louis. It really does taste good.” 

“Be honest.” Louis whispers.

“The mash is a bit soggy, but the chicken is amazing.” Harry grins, sends a wink and slips his hand off of Louis’. Louis thumb travels after him, catching Harry’s peaky. 

Their hands stay interlocked, “cheers Curly.” Harry’s eyes sprinkle in a light green when he looks into Louis’ blues. The moment seems to stand still, until one of the candles blows out, because of their breaths fanning heavily over them. “Shit, mind lightening them again. I’ll get the wine.” Louis gets up to retrieve the red wine. He pushes the wine bottle between his thighs to uncork the damn thing. He rips and aches around the cork unwilling to free itself. “I’m only tryin’ t’ help ye here.” Louis moans to the bottle. Harry’s laughter reaches him and Louis looks up to see Harry leaning forward, his eyes half closed, arms wound around his stomach. “Not funny Harold.” 

“Give it here.” Harry giggles, reaching out his hand. Louis unwillingly hands it over and watches Harry’s bicep strain against his shirt for a moment, before the cork plops out of the neck of the bottle. “Very fancy Lou.” He giggles filling Louis glass.

Louis dangles his legs excitedly and cheers his glass against Harry’s. They start eating again. He places his crossed ankles on Harry’s right knee. He looks up, but doesn’t push Louis away. He continues eating happily, sharing a few words with Harry. It feels good, and his heart keeps skipping whenever he manages to make Harry giggle. 

“Want to hear a joke?” Harry asks, while he helps Louis clean up. 

“Sure.” Louis rolls his eyes, snapping his hip against Harry’s. He grins down at the older boy. 

“A nun says to her vibrator… stop shivering so much it’s my first time too.” Louis can’t stop himself, but start to laugh, just as Harry honks his weird goat-like chortle. Louis leans over to give him a delicate kiss on the cheek. 

“I got one…” Louis giggles against his cheek. “A nun goes to the gynaecologist for a check-up. The doctor tries to pull her leg and tells her she’s pregnant. The nun shakes her head and says, ‘Oh boy, what do people put on candles these days’.” Harry laughs again. 

“How long did it take you to find that?” Harry giggles into Louis’ side, his hands roaming over Louis spine. Goosebumps run across Louis’ and the bottom of his glasses fog up from the heat on his cheeks.

“Don’t knaw… I knaw ye like dumb jokes.” Louis snickers, running a hand to tweak Harry’s nipple. Harry squeals, his hand leaving Louis’ spine. “This shirt is sinful, babe.” He leans over Harry, who is trapped against the kitchen isle. 

Harry trembles, “my shirt?… what about my pants?” Louis’ eyes travel down to the pants. His fingertips travel across his thigh.

He reads some of the blue writing out loud, “banana lover? Suck me dry? Love me good?” He starts chuckling, “the fock Haz? Where’d ye even get this?” 

“Gay thrift shop in Manchester.” Harry mumbles, shivering when Louis’ fingertips travel over his bulge. Harry takes a sharp breath in. “Louis…”

Louis slowly leans forward, eyes on Harry’s lips. Their lips touch, before the door bursts open. “HARRY!” The twins scream. 

The two jump apart. “Sorry, I tried to hold them back.” Dan says, looking at Harry and then at Louis individually. 

“No worries.” Louis cracks out.

“Looks like you boys had fun.” Jay says, walking through the front door. 

“Yeah, Louis didn’t burn anything for a change.” Harry giggles, poking Louis into the side. Louis bats his hand away but winks, nonetheless. 

“I thought ye wanted to do a date.” Jay says thoughtfully. “Where’s the girl?” She looks around. 

Louis swallows, and Harry gives him a panicked look. “We saw monkeys, Harry.” Daisy unknowingly saves the situation. “And deer…and wild cats…” She sounded like she was going to go on forever. 

“Sounds wonderful, love.” Louis grins and kisses the top of her head. “I can give ye a lift.” Louis says to Harry.

“What about the mess?” Jay asks looking around.

“Go ahead. Drive him home. But when you come back, you clean all this up.” Dan demands, before grabbing the twins and moving them to the coat racks to peel them out of their outdoor clothes. 

The drive home is relatively quiet, Louis can see Harry nervously twisting his ring. “Thank you for today, Louis.”

Louis gets the car out of gear and pulls the hand brake. He looks into the house and sees a curtain shift. Anne’s peeking out of the window on the first floor. “Ye wanted to know the real me.” Louis finally says, looking at Harry, who is twisting a curl around his finger. “This is me.” Louis says, pointing down at himself. “I wear red loud pants, proudly. I wear glasses… sometimes… only around people I trust. I wear suspenders, because their fun. And I don’t like the restrictions of a sock.” Louis reaches over to grab Harry’s hand twisting their fingers together. “So take it or leave it.” 

Harry stares down at their hands, “I think you're beautiful like this.” He leans forward and places a kiss on his lips. 

“Maybe we can repeat this sort of thing again.” Louis says hopeful, staring at the green eyes that bore into his soul. “I mean this time with ye knowing about it.” 

“I’d love to.” Harry says. Louis captures his lips again, tasting the chicken on them. Harry doesn’t let him deepen it, though. “My mum’s watching. I don’t think you want to give her a show.”

Louis swallows, “will she tell?” 

“No.” Harry smiles and caresses his thumb over the back of his hand. “See you at school tomorrow.” 

“Yeah.” Louis manages to squeak out. Harry laughs, when he opens the door and winks at him, before de-lodging their hands from each other.

Louis cleans the kitchen of the remainders of the date. His heart is happily pumping in his chest, and he joyfully hums to himself. Once he’s back in his room, he gets a look at the small plan Liam had created. The only thing left for him to do, he notices, is to give Harry the letters. He dares not to think about the face Harry would make while reading the letters one after another. 

No. He can’t hand deliver them, but he has to give them to him. Louis wants him to know all of his heart, and the only way to do that is by giving Harry the letters, to let him know the deep dark desperately embarrassing drivel during his darkest time. Louis grabs another piece of paper and sits down at the table for the very first time. He likes doing his homework on his bed rather than at a table. He laughs in his hand and starts writing,

My Harry,

02 Dec. 

I had fun today. I can’t remember when my heart was so much in use as today. Hihi, you make me a lovesick teenager.  I will always remember the very first time we met, the very first time my lips touched your lips, the very first time you wrapped your arms around me and rested your head on my shoulder. And today I could feel the connection again, the pull of you to me. My heart bursts again. Hopes again. Your arms are my shelter.

You hesitate to be with me. I understand that. So I figure it is time for me to say how much I feel for you. I can’t imagine me life without you ever! I can’t live without you, the honk of your laugh. I need to taste you every day, and I need to see your dimples every day! I can’t imagine living without you. You pull me home. You make me a better person. And if you let me I could give you the life and the love you deserve.

I will put a ticket for the Romeo&Juliet show in here for you. I sing, not well, but I sing my own songs. And they are all inspired by you. Mostly by the way I felt lost without you when we were separated in summer. I want you to read them too, the other letters. And come to my show. I’m bad at voicing my feelings, but this way I can properly show you how I feel. Please come. Baby you are my future.

In deepest love,

Lou

He takes the rolled up letters and adds the last one on top of it. He takes a red envelope and squeezes all of them inside. On top he writes To Harry E. Styles, and adds the address. He licks the envelope and closes it up. _Can’t believe I’m doin’ this!_

💚🍑💙

The high of his date stays with him for the next week. He feels giddy and excited. Their texts are getting more intimate and Harry even gets a bit into the sexting Louis tries to initiate. Louis feels great. The songs for the play become more and more romantic, and he feels powerful when he thinks of the way Harry’s eyes would crinkle, and he would giggle at the words. _God, I can’t wait to share this with him._

“Here’s your pay check.” Geoff slides over a pack of notes to Louis.

“Thanks.” Louis grins.

“Should help you with all those presents you have to buy, right?” Geoff smiles. Louis told his boss a couple of weeks ago he has to buy seven presents. Maybe even eight, if he has to buy Mark’s girlfriend a present too.

“I got a different bill I have to fill first.” Louis says, counting out the remaining few bills, which he needs for Nick. Just in time too, he promised Nick to repay him by Christmas, which was two weeks away. 

“Never good to have loans, boy.” Geoff says and waves him away. “Get going, I don’t want your mother calling to see where you’re at.”

“She’s never done tha’.” Louis says, mortified. “Has she?” 

“No.” Geoff laughs and shoos him away. “Would be funny.” He says under his breath.

After sending Eleanor a quick text to join him to buy gifts for his sisters at Sophora, he spends Saturday in Manchester. He buys Fizzy a nice edgy smelling perfume and Lottie a Naked eye-colour palette. He buys Eleanor a lipstick from MAC as a ‘thank you’ gift. 

He drops her at home, before walking up to the Grimshaw house. The track up to the front door is muddy and the small trees look bare and cold. He rings the bell, clutching the envelope tightly in his hand. 

Thankfully, Nick opens the door and not one of his family members. That conversation could have become embarrassing. “Are ye ever in Liverpool, pal?“ Louis chuckles. 

“Hi.” Nick says instead. “What you want Tommo?” He’s only wearing a pair of sweats, his boney chest exposed. He looks a little sweaty and the fringe sticks to his forehead.

Louis hands over the envelope, he points out “before Christmas.” Nick takes the money and starts counting it.

“Never stopped doubting you, mate. Harry vouched for you.” Nick says, stuffing the bills back. “Cheers.” 

“Harry vouched for me?” Louis asks surprised.

“Yeah. Said you are good for your word. You actually think I would make a deal with you if I thought you weren’t good for it?” Nick cocks his hip.

“Never really thought about it.” Louis says instead. 

“Who is it Nick?” A deep voice screams through the house. _I knaw tha’ voice._ A door to the living room flies open, Harry looks over Nick’s shoulder. He isn’t wearing anything except for a tiny towel hanging loosely around his hips. His chest is red like a rash, and he obviously sweat a lot. _Properly from the cardio._ Louis’ hands begin to shake. Looking from one wet torso to the next. Harry’s eyes are dilated, and Nick looks too smug.

“Just Louis, love.” Nick says. 

“I… Lou…” Harry stumbles over the words again.

“I see…” Louis says. His eyes still trained on the red sweaty torso. “We’re quit.” Louis says. To Nick or Harry, he doesn’t even know himself. He stumbles backwards down the front step, loses his footing and falls on his ass. “Ow…” he whines. 

“Tommo, you alright?” Nick asks.

But they get lost under Harry’s call “Lou!” Louis gets back to his feet, holding his wrist and rushing away from the naked Harry. He runs to his car, eyes filling with tears and his wrist hurting from the fall. He sniffles, when Harry reaches the car. He hammers his flat hand against the window. “Lou, please. It’s not what it looks like. I promise. There’s just you… Lou, please. Stop. Let’s talk.” Louis starts the car, not looking at the nakedness hammering against his window. He pushes the gear into first and drives off, he sees Harry slither across the pavement on his naked feet. But he doesn’t run after him, and Louis can barely see the street, tears running down his face. _So that’s what I get for trying? Now were quit. Now he made me a fool, just as I made him a fool. I should have seen this._ _Why am I so blind?_

Louis comes back to his room, tears still flooding down. He freezes in the door, there is something amiss. He can’t see what it is, but something is missing. _Is it the bed? No. The thousand things on the ground, looks just as messy as always. The Table!_ There’s no envelope! Hefrantically starts going through everything, as if there was the slightest hope that he put it into one of the drawers. “What are you doing?” Lottie asks, she sounds amused. Louis looks up at her, eyes red and puffy while his knees slide and falls on the papers which are surrounding him now. 

“Where is it?” He asks, desperately. His fingers sliding over the paper almost causing him to slip to the ground fully.

“Louis what’s going on? What are you looking for?” Lottie goes into a crouch and approaches him like he is a racoon. 

“Where are they? They’re gone, Lottie.” He grabs some papers, and they fall through his hand like sand. They start to shake vigorously. “This can’t be… Lots, they’re gone.” He starts hysterically crying and Lottie quickly grabs him like the jumpy cat he is. She cradles him against her slightly taller body. 

“Louis, ye have to tell me what’s happening.” Louis just starts crying more hysterical. It’s scares Lottie, making her own eyes water up too.

Out of another corner he can hear someone else approach. “What’s wrong?” 

“I don’t know. Something is missing. He’s looking for something.” Lottie says against Louis’ temple.

Jay brushes Louis fringe away, and she comes to view. “What are you looking for boo?” 

“The letters … the letters.” He can’t say anything more.

Jay hums and says “I only know about one letter, Boo. I deposited it at the post office.” A sharp pain moves through his heart, and Louis thinks that might be the feeling that you get if the ice-cold hand of a ghost grabs your heart. He screams, like a wolf in pain. “Jesus, Louis. What is it? Should I have not?” 

Louis whines and cries in Lottie’s arm. “Who were they posted to?” Lottie asks their mum.

“Harry. Harry Styles.” Jay says, her voice going quieter by the syllable. Louis shivers in the grasp.

“The fuck happened?” Fizzy asks. 

“Fiz, baby, take the girls and take them somewhere.” She’s still caressing Louis fringe.

“Where?” Fizzy asks annoyed.

“I don’t care. Anywhere. They shouldn’t see their brother this way.” Fizzy seems to understand the desperation of their mother and hurries away.

They can hear her say, in her sweetest baby-voice, “come on babies.” Louis wishes she were here. _She understands_!

“Can you tell us why you don’t want me to deposit the letter?” Jay asks a couple of minutes later. 

“I told him, I told him everythin’…in them letters…ye…he knaws it all now…I don’t think I can breathe.” He starts hyperventilating and there are spots on his eyes.

“Breathe with me.” Louis follows his mother breathing in and out, slowly, one after another. “Now, tell me what you told him, what’s so bad. Let me understand, boo.”

“I told him, told him I love him.” Lottie’s jaw hits bottom, and Jay freezes in place.

“I had no idea.” Jay says. And that makes Louis break into another fit of crying.

Louis can hear Dan and Jay talking quietly together. She wants to sedate him, free him of the over-powering feeling he has right now. Dan is busy blaming himself for keeping Louis’ secrets and turns Jay to lie down with her son again.

Louis has calmed down some when his mother scoopshim back up in her arms. “You said you love him?” She eventually says, rubbing her hands over his back.

“I don’t knaw.” Louis sniffles, “it feels like it. Might be infatuation, but I’m falling mum. FOR A BOY!” He whines, clutching her hips. 

“Ouch…” She whines, and Louis lets her go apologising. “Boo… You never know who we fall in love with, and it’s never someone that we actually expect it to be.” She says, an eye at the door where Dan is smiling at her. “We become better people when were are connected to the right person. And from what I have seen, Harry has made you a good person. Don’t get me wrong, you were always a good boy. But he made you question those things you didn’t dare to look at, those that defined you, but you were scared to face. So when you think you met the person you are mean to be with, promise me something lovey! Never let ‘em go. Cherish it.” She kisses the top of his head. 

“Mum I… I’m sorry I never told.” He whispers.

“I know. Oh, honey I know.” She rocks him in her arms. 

“I love ye mum.” Louis sniffles into her stomach. He can feel her stomach against his cheeks. It must have grown a bit since the last time he had a proper sniffle against it. 

“And I love you!” She whines and cries with him. His sisters walk up to him and cuddle into the small miserable ball. Dan shakes his head from the doorway. Smiling to himself, he watches his step-family cry together.

💚🍑💙

Louis’ next week passes in a trembling blur. Monday and Tuesday he takes a break and his mother writes him a sick note. Liam comes over and plays FIFA with him, and Louis admits his fears about Harry, the letters and Nick. Liam tells him Harry hasn’t told him about any letters. 

Wednesday he spends his lunch with Niall, practicing fake guitar playing. Niall tells him Harry is distraught. He wants to explain himself about Nick. Something about a spa in Nick’s house. Louis doesn’t listen and walks out on him, after Niall tries to call Harry to make them talk. 

He cries in the loo before play rehearsal. Thankfully, Corden doesn’t say anything about his blood shot eyes. And Leigh-Anne distracts him, while they walk to his car, so Louis doesn’t see Harry standing near them, clutching some stray letters in his hands.

Thursday he skips footie practice to go through one last rehearsal, to say he is nervous is an understatement. He just hopes his voice doesn’t shiver while he sings. 

Friday arrives. Louis feels like he could forget all the lyrics to his own songs and could cry. He spends the day staring down at the lyrics without processing anything. Lunch he spends in the theatre, Liam and Zayn find him. Louis doesn’t have the energy to be angry at Zayn and lets him cheer Louis up. 

The assembly starts filling up, Louis watches through the curtains how Ashton, Calum, Luke and Michael sit down in the front. “I hope they don’t muck up.” Louis says to Leigh-Anne. She rubs his arm soothingly. Besides the Harry fiasco, he had issues with his fear. What if Ashton and his friends would make fun of him, throw things at him during his solos, call him gay. What if after tonight he gets outed? His hands shake and sweat. 

“Dan will come through. Just wait and see.” Leigh says. Louis nods, but the fear scribbles back up into the knot forming in his throat. _Dan will come through!_ He hangs on to that sentence. Danielle and Leigh, who were both playing the lesbian main characters of the play, had voiced their concern of homophobia. They, like many in the play, were worried Ashton and his group would start booing and interjecting homophobic language during their performances. 

Louis had come up with a solution, he had asked Dan and Jay to shut them up. When Jay and Dan walk into the theatre, they look to the curtains. Louis raises three fingers into the air. They shuffle into the third row and walk up to where Ashton and his pals are sitting. Louis makes a sitting notion. Dan nods and kicks at Ashton’s knee, “move boy.” 

“Find your own seat.” Ashton says, pointing to the empty seat next to Michael. 

The lights begin to dim, “move it boy!” Ashton and Clifford stand up to move one over, while Calum and Luke move over on the other side for Jay. Like this the four troublemakers are all separated from each other by Dan and Jay sitting between them. Louis chuckles and gives Dan a thumbs-up. 

“He’s a bit of a stickler, but when I need him he’s always there to help.” Louis says to Leigh, who looks relieved as well.

“Alright everyone, good show and break a leg!” Corden calls. Everyone shuffles to their places and the curtain lifts. 

The first scene starts: Leigh as Romy, Louis as Ben and Meg as Merry go to a Halloween party at the Capulet house. Romy is hang over Ross, her ex boyfriend. Merry complains about having to step foot in a Capulet home, showcasing a feud. At the party, Lady Capulet tells Danielle as Juli to find Paris, who is played by Anthony. He would be a great match for her. Juli says she’s gay and would never find such a man attractive. Lady Capulet is enraged.

Romy and Juli meet of course. The audience awes when Danielle and Leigh-Anne kiss. “You kiss by the book.” Danielle says her line. 

“Got your head in novels have ye?” Leigh-Anne giggles back. 

“More like fan fictions.” The young in the audience laugh and the old look confused. 

“Rug munchers!” Ashton calls loudly, Dan whips around to him. A hand clutches the back of Ashton’s neck and pushes him downwards. Dan whispers into his ear, Ashton tries to struggle, but quickly gives up when the doctor renders him incapable. 

Louis tries not to get distracted. He steps up saying a few words about the blooming love of Romy and Juliet. He grabs his guitar and pretends to strum the instrument, the first few sentences wobble a bit, but eventually his voice gets stronger. The rest of the crew try to re-set the stage for the balcony scene.

“We're driving down a one-way road

To something better, something better

You'll have learnt from it when it comes back

You'll be doing better, yeah, doing better

'Cause life gets hard and it gets messed up

When the high's too high and the low's too low

When you love someone and they let you go

Don't you let it kill you

Even when it hurts like hell

Oh, whatever tears you apart

Don't let it break your heart

Time takes time to heal it

You can't do it by yourself

Oh, whatever tears you apart

Don't let it break your heart”

He stops singing making room for Juliet to come to her Romy. He watches the balcony scene with a smile on his lips. He tries to look into the assembly to see if Harry is in the audience. _What does he think when he hears me sing? Does he understand what I try to say?_

His next song starts, while the others prepare another party scene behind him.

“I come runnin' to you like a moth into a flame

You tell me, "Take it easy," but it's easier to say

Wish I didn't need so much of you

I hate to say, but I do

I'm lost in my head, I'm spinnin' again

Tryna find what to say to you

Never been so defenceless (Ooh)

You just keep on buildin' up your fences (Oh)

But I've never been so defenceless (Ooh).”

He joins the next scene in a nice come together, Romy tells Ben about her love she found at the party. “In sadness cousin I do love a woman.” She says.

“I aim'd so near, when I supposed you loved” Louis, as Ben, says. Through the nurse played by Taylor, Romy invites Juli to a party. Here they take drugs together. A fight breaks out between Juli and Paris. 

Impressed by her fighting skills with Paris. Romy and Juli hide behind a makeshift wall and a few moans are supposed to symbolise that they had sex at the party.

Louis overlays the moans with his louder words “As Romy and Juli share their first night with each other, Romy’ mother is told of the fight. Henceforth Juli is grounded. But she has her sweet memory of her Juli.” He starts singing into the sky,

“ We’re dancing on tables

And I’m off my face

With all of my people

And it couldn’t get better they say

We’re singing 'til last call

And it’s all out of tune

Should be laughing, but there’s something wrong

And it hits me when the lights go on

Shit, maybe I miss you

Just like that and I’m sober

I’m asking myself, “Is it over?”

Maybe I was lying when I told you

“Everything is great

Everything is fucking great”

And all of these thoughts and the feelings

Cheers to that if you don’t need them

I’ve been checking my phone all evening

Such a good time

I believe it this time.”

The tower is back in position, Juliet visits Romy at her doorstep. Romy is stuck in the tower. She proclaims she had no more money on her phone card which is why she couldn’t call her to tell her about her mother putting her on house arrest. Eventually, Juli is shooed away by the Mongues. Louis sips on a tea while he watches the scene unfold, until he walks up again, to sing in chorus with Danielle who has a decent voice,

“Looking in the dark (Ooh) with an empty heart

But you say you feel the same

Could we ever be enough? (Ooh) Baby, we could be enough

And it's alright

Calling out for somebody to hold tonight

When you're lost, I'll find a way, I'll be your light

You'll never feel like you're alone

I'll make this feel like home.”

Louis can feel himself getting more confident in this. Thankfully, Ashton is quiet from now on, shivering whenever he gets a side eye from Dan. The scene starts up again, Juliet goes to a party where she takes too many drugs. Romy finds her and thinks she is dead. Determined to kill herself too, she takes the rest of the drugs surrounding her. 

Louis sings from off-stage, allowing the audience to watch Romy and Juliet overdose next to each other. 

“I know you're saying you don't wanna hurt me, 

well maybe you should show a little mercy

The way you look, I know you didn't come to apologise.”

The rest of the crew starts joining Louis to sing the next part: 

“Hey, hey, hey

Oh, why you wearing that to walk out of my life?

Hey, hey, hey

Oh, even though it's over you should stay tonight

Hey, hey, hey

If tomorrow you won't be mine, won't you give it to me one last time?

Oh, baby, let me love you goodbye.”

They abruptly stop singing when Juli sits up, coming back to herself. She sees Romy dying next to her and tries to shake Romy out of her coma. Romy starts waking up as we’ll. The two girls embrace “only a little overdose.” Juli says. 

“I already told you to be more careful with that stuff.” Romy shakes her head.

“I know my love.” The two girls kiss.

The crew starts singing the last song together. Louis feels his heart tumble up his throat, when he thinks about Harry hearing him. _Does he know what I’m trying to say?_

“I'm wastin' my time when it was always you, always you

Chasin' the high, but it was always you, always you

Should've never let you go-oh-oh

Should've never let you go-oh, my baby

Go-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh

I went to so many places

Looking for you in their faces

I can feel it, oh, I can feel it.”

Louis’ voice echoes the last two lines by himself in his own sweet slightly high voice,

“My baby

Oh, my baby.”

The last scene starts with all the crew on the stage, Romy and Juli proclaim their love in front of their families and demand they’d be taken serious. The last kiss ends with a raining applause from the audience. Louis grins proudly and winks at his sisters. His family stands for a standing ovation. Ashton grumbles into his hands, until Dan kicks his knees again and he too starts clapping. Leigh and Louis grab each others hands to bow. “See, he did good.” Leigh laughs, squeezing his hand. “Great idea Louis.” She says and waves at Jordan, who is sitting together with Lottie in the back.  


“That was amazing Lou!” The twins giggle and rush to him behind the stage. They thrust a couple of roses into his arms. Louis cradles them and thanks them. 

Liam congratulates him too, “Dan kept Ashton in check pretty good, mate. We should keep him around.” 

“I was planning on it.” Louis smiles, winking at Dan who is curling his wife against his side. “Did ye guys see Harry?” He asks. Zayn and Liam awkwardly shift on their feet, until Zayn smacks his elbow into Liam’s side. 

“Sorry, Louis, I didn’t see him.” Liam finally says. 

“That’s fine. Thanks.” He ignores the disappointment in his gut. “Fish and Chips anyone?” 

💚🍑💙

_He's got so much else going on right now. But the letters. The letter came back, he swears he feels something for me. I think he means love, but thankfully he doesn’t tell me this in a letter. I want to look into his sky blue eyes when he tells me that. Maybe I’m just jumping the gun again._

_I only heard Lou sing once. Tonight, I get to hear his voice six times. SIX! Niall had to buy his own ticket, as I clutch the one which Lou had put into the letters for me._ Why won’t he talk to me? 

_Does he sing for me? Some lyrics are dangerously close to the letters. I’d frame them if I could. Love letters and so many of them. I thought he hated me. He fucked around all summer, when he was thinking of me all day. He was doing everything for me! Zayn was so wrong about him. Why did I listen to him? Niall just loves saying “I told you so.”_

_He’s my future. And I will fight for us now. He carried all the weight of my hate, and now it’s my turn to win him back again. Isn’t this a fucked up relationship?_

_He’s so beautiful and he has such a good way with words. And they are all for me! I’ll fly away if you don’t hold me down. I want to go back every night, and I will too. Until Louis talks to me again._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading❣️  
> If you liked please klick the kudos button, and if you already did please leave a comment. ❤︎
> 
> So the next chapter might take me longer, because I'll be driving to my parents to spend Christmas with my family. I live in Germany and it is permitted for us to celebrate in groups of 10. I might not be able to write as much, because my family doesn't know I write this (accept for my twin) and they are all nosy shits (I say with fondness). I will try to get a Christmas chapter up on time for Louis' birthday. 
> 
> Some canon/explanatory notes…  
> 1\. A lot of Daisy and Phoebe is based on what I know from my own relationship with my twin (incl. making their own language, having one loud strong one and one who hides a bit more and less loud)  
> 2\. Zayn is often mentioned to have had some form of a eating disorder and substance abuse during the last year at 1D, I try to incorporate it, but I'm not an expert on this, so I won't go into detail.  
> 3\. I couldn't resist writing a small section about Louis cooking his famous parma-ham chicken for Harry.  
> 4\. Protests at Abortion Clinics is a huge problem in America and UK, and the woman seeking it are often venerable and feel emotionally abused by these riots. I'd like to think Harry would volunteer helping woman make their own choices.  
> 5\. Romeo and Juliet. I decided to make it a lesbian modern play, though I didn't want to go into detail. I'm not much of a drama person, so I hope the minimal description was enough.


	9. Lights for Louis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmass!!!!!
> 
> I'm sorry this chapter is a bit late, but my family has our big Christmas celebration on Christmas Eve and everything got a bit hectic.  
> Happy Birthday to the man himself Louis.  
> Enjoy my little Christmas chapter!
> 
> (Trigger Warning: smut, a few curse words and homophobia, a breeze of angst, and some more smut)

“Shut up, TOMLINSON!” 

Louis won’t have any of this, “but ye rise above a girl. Above a girl who loved, who was missing, and who is now desperate. Isn't she like ye, too? And in her despair, and in her remorse, isn't she perhaps even stronger than you? She has the power t’ endure your laughter. She has to endure bad blood, hatred and harassment. But doesn’t it also mean ‘forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors’? Our strength lies in forgiveness.” Louis is quite proud of the words he had studied off by heart. Eleanor and he had gone through multiple different scenarios how this was going to go and how Louis could manipulate them. 

“Don’t you dare cite the bible to me.” Clive Calder scratches at his bald head, while he stares down at Louis still holding his daughters hand. 

“But if ye not willing to forgive yer own daughter her debts, how will God forgive ye yer own sins. For example… let me think… ye turnin’ yer back on yer own blood for fallin’ in love with the wrong man.” Louis says. 

“Why are you even here if you two broke up?” Clive’s head is still read from all the fumes he’s not letting out, boiling up with rage like a steam engine. It reminds Louis of the third Harry Potter film, where steam rolls out of Potter’s ears. He wants to smirk but holds it in. 

“I’m protecting her. We’re friends.” Louis says.

“Friends?” Patricia sniffles into her handkerchief. _Jesus she knows how to be melodramatic._

“Yes we are friends, mother.” Eleanor says bluntly. 

“Don’t roll your eyes child.” Clive warns her. 

“Dad look at her. She pretends like this is the worst thing that could happen to this family, which isn’t remotely true.”Eleanor exclaims, throwing her free hand in the air. 

“Watch your tone.” Clive’s deep growl rumbles through the living room.

“But it’s true, we broke up. There’s nothin’ wrong with tha’. We are stayin’ friends, and Eleanor has fallen in love again. How is tha’ bad?” Louis tries to sooth the conversation again. 

“Because it’s a stab-ble boy.” Patricia cries loudly. 

“And what am I?” Louis asks. “Me father left me family when I was a baby. I grew up in Doncaster in a tiny home, me parents were barely able t’ pay gas money every month. I ‘ave an entire litter of sisters. I work in a Fish and Chips store, and he works in a barn with good stable pay! So how is a nice boy from a good home worse than me?” There’s a short moment of silence. 

“He cleans my boots.” Clive says sharply.

“Yer idea of the modern world is archaic.” Louis says. 

“Get out of my house.” Clive says, but the hand around Louis’ squeezes tightly. Clive looks back down on their joined hands again, “there is no place for you here any more!” 

Louis swallows, “I’m sorry, but I can’t leave her alone right now. We’re friends after all.” 

“Stop using that idiotic word!” Clive screams. Louis is saved from answering that belatedly ignorant idiot from the bell ring. 

“Ah that’ll be Max.” Louis jumps up to run to the door. 

“What?” Clive still calls after him. Louis throws the large door open and Max smiles at him a little anxious. He got his hair in a bun and is wearing a dress shirt. For that Louis is glad, _what would Clive, the idiot, think of Max arriving in jeans! Outrageous that would be_.

“Right moment?” Max whispers to him. 

“Right as it’ll ever be.” Louis says and urges him over the threshold. Together they walk back into the living room. Clive suddenly shuts up as soon as they enter, alarming Louis to Eleanor’s state of disarray. She looks down trotten and her head is hanging low, allowing her hair to fall like curtains before her face. He’s seen this in Harry quite often, when he tries to hide a blush or his sadness, but never from Eleanor. Both ex and current boyfriend walk back to the sofa, and sit down on either side of the dark-haired girl. In a comforting gesture each grabs one hand. 

“Evening Mr Calder.” Max says, chin held high, “evening Mrs. Calder.” 

“Oh no…” Patricia says, and a fresh pearl of tears runs down her cheeks. _Can’t she just stop with this display?_

“So you’re bedding my daughter now? This was your game all along, push Louis out, so you can get into my family, worm yourself to the top?” Clive says sternly, he starts pacing again. 

“Wow tha’ was incredibly dark, mate.” Louis says, a crooked smirk pulling at the left side of his face. Max snorts in an attempt to hold in his snicker. 

“Sir, I had none of that in mind when I met your daughter. It’s just… something in credible happened to us. Something I can’t change.” 

“What is that?” Patricia whines, sniffing every now and again. Louis tries hard not to roll his eyes at her. 

“We fell in love.” 

“Of course you had to go there!” Clive yells at the ceiling. “This grotesque display is just to anger us, Patricia. Don’t you realise how you horrify your mother and I?”

“That’s never my intention…” Eleanor says.

“Your whole play is getting quite irritating.” Clive says instead. “Increasingly so.” 

“Quite.” Louis says. He rubs his hands over his knee caps, in an attempt to free them of their sweaty-ness. “I’m goin’ t’ head out. Ye lot,” he points at El and Max while standing up, “are welcome t’ come along. For me part I had enough of this blown-up pompering. Ye can keep on stompin’ around if ye want Clive or crying about Trish, but me and El not a good idea any more. I can barely get it up when I look at her.” 

“I beg your pardon?” Clive gasps.

“And Max, for that matter, has been the most patient boy I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. They do ‘ave me blessings. Well done lad.” Louis winks at Max, “and someone once told me not ever to beg for forgiveness, it’s so common.” Louis tips his hat at Patricia and aims to rush to the front door.

“Lou wait!” Eleanor stands up, her eyes are still pink, from the silent crying. “We’ll come with you.” 

“You will certainly not, young lady.” Clive warns, standing in her way.

“Oh papa, I do love you. But Louis is right about everything. You taught me to be a headstrong young woman, and that’s who I am being right now!” She pushes past her father with Max on her other hand. 

“Good Evening.” Max squeaks out at the Calder’s. 

In a rather silent few seconds, the three pile out of the house and into Bertie. The old girl moans under the pressure now lying on its axis. They remain quiet for some time. The ice is broken by Eleanor, who leaves a rather loud fart against the seat cushion. “Mate!” Louis snickers, as he holds up his arm sleeve against his nose.

“I’m sorry. I can’t help it. I have to fart when I’m nervous. I’ve been holding it too long by now!” She whines from the middle seat behind Louis. “Do you find me unattractive now?” Even though the question was clearly directed at Max, Louis’ and Max’s eyes fall on each other though the rear-view mirror. 

“NO!” Both boys say at the same time. Eleanor let’s out another embarrassing squeak, and the boys bark out a few laughs at her expense. It loosens the tension. “Where to then?” Louis asks, once rubbed away the tears of laughter from the corner of his eyes. 

“Can you drive us to my home? My mum wants to meet Eleanor now. I suppose we’re official now, right?” Max asks hopefully, while Louis starts the car. He can’t wait to get out of the Calder driveway. Even outside the house, their toxicity glooms into the pebbles on the ground. 

“Yes, okay and yes.” Eleanor giggles the answers to Max’s list of questions, another small fart escapes her. Louis has to raise his wrist against his nose to stifle the laughter this time. He doesn’t presume it to be fair to take it out on her further. 

“Ye do realise I got no idea where ye live, mate?” Louis grins when he leaves the driveway to the left. 

“Damn, sorry.” Max says, like they non-existing friendship surprised him. “It’s actually the other way.” Louis makes an illegal u-turn, which makes Eleanor squeals in the back as she falls over. 

“Put yer bloody seatbelt on, love.” Louis tuts at her like he would with any of his sisters. 

“Sorry. Sorry.” Eleanor frantically grabs for the seatbelt. Louis bites his lip in satisfaction when he hears the seatbelt click into place. They pass the Calder home again, Patricia is standing at the door, holding her handkerchief while searching for something. 

“I think yer mum is comin’ around.” Louis says. He smiles at her through the mirror, before making a sharp right turn to head to Max’s place.

“Cheers for bein’ there.” Max says.

“Right, I think it was for the best.” Louis says, shifting gear as they reach a thirty zone. 

“Thank you, Lou.” Eleanor says and lets her hand drop on top of his shoulder.

“No worries, love.” Louis says, her warm palm feels wonderful on his draped skin.

She scoots forward and lets her chin fall on his shoulder, “best fake boyfriend ever.” 

“Get me a trophy for tha’ will ye?” Louis asks her, while punching the brake at a small red-stoned home. “This it?” 

“Yeah, cheers mate. Really, for everything!”Max and Louis clap their hands together in a bro-like fashion. Louis takes the gear out of shift and turns to face his ex-girlfriend, _finally yay,_ the two look into each other’s eyes for a minute, all the gratitude buried in them. 

“Thanks for everthin’, yeah?” Louis says to her. She nods and kisses his cheek one last time. 

“I’m still here if ever… you need me again.” She says with tears in her eyes.

“Got a good lad there, don’t let him go, yeah?” Louis says and pokes her cheek. 

“You too.” She says, Louis face falls. The beauty of the grotesqueness of the Calder’s was he completely forgot about his own love life. “Don’t look at me like that! Harry wants to talk to you! He can explain everything, he told me so himself. Don’t say anything… we’re not friends… but we have mutual respect for each other. Because of you for that matter. Now he will explain everything if you give him the chance. You two have a great chance at a future together. You two are so stubborn, it’s uncanny.” 

“Cheers.” Is all Louis says. 

“My stubborn little Elf.” Eleanor pats his cheek. “I’m just one call away.” She says before getting out the back. 

Louis lets down the window on the passenger side, “if yer family gives ye trouble, I’ll always pick up too!” El nods, while hers and Max's fingers interlock. She presses a kiss against his window, once he has closed it and waves at him, when Louis drives off. _I hope they make it._ He thinks while he heads home. 

💚🍑💙

On the last Weekend before Louis’ birthday, Liam insists on taking him to a nightclub. They take a train up north with Zayn, and Liam had found a bus which would take them back the same night. Originally Louis had wanted to go to Doncaster, but his mother had been reluctant to let him travel at all during the Christmas season, stating it was too much of a hassle to drive through the Christmas debauchery which happens during this time of year on the streets. 

He didn’t want to clean any party up, so he opted to party with Zayn and Liam. In Manchester, they got off of the train, Louis has been making fun of Liam the entire way there. He couldn’t get his face out of his phone. “Mate, Zayn’s here. Ye ain’t got no one else to text.” 

Zayn shoves an elbow into Louis’ ribs. “Leave him!” 

Louis rolls his eyes, he hasn’t forgotten about Zayn’s multiple betrayals against him. But the past week, Zayn had been at two of his four shows and had been trying to make Louis smile. _What else are friends for? Friends, are we tha’ at all_? “Ye banging on the piss?” Louis chuckles against Zayn’s side. 

Zayn grabs his fringe and shoves him, so Louis collides with a grumbling Liam. “Watch it!” 

“Liy-um! Ye’re no fun! This is for me birthday!” He whines loudly, he hates it when people stop paying attention to him. Especially his friends. 

“Stop whining this is it!” Zayn says. They stop in front of a black painted pub, which reads Brentwood Nightclub with a large Stag on a small creaking sign above it. Louis bites his lip looking at the impressive group of people standing outside. 

“It’ll be forever before we get in.” Louis whines.

“You really are dramatic.” Zayn rolls his eyes and shoves him forward to follow Liam. 

“The line is tha’ way fellas!” Louis says, pointing his hand toward the long line of people. 

“Louis,” Liam abruptly turns around to him. “Do us a favour and shut up for three minutes!” Louis crosses his arms over his chest and pouts. _This is me Birthday! Mine!_ “Got it?” Liam insists.

Louis lifts his hand to show a three, and then at his phone before stuffing it into the way-to-tight jeans he squeezed into tonight. The three move forward again until they are standing right in front of the bouncer. 

“Line’s that way lads.” The guy says dully. 

“We got a table, under Payne.” Liam says, and Louis’ eyes open comically wide. _He got us a table, for three people?_ He opens his mouth, but Zayn gives him a smirk from the side. So he closes his lips again like fish. 

The bouncer unhooks the line, so the three can move through. “Nice Name lad!” He chuckles toward Liam. 

“Cheers.” Liam says, his hand grabs for Zayn’s dainty wrist and Zayn usher’s him away into the club. A small hostess, who is even tinier than Louis, manoeuvres them to their table. Louis admires her for her ability to make people move like she’s can move water. It’s an ability he prides himself in too, _maybe we are soulmates_? Louis makes a mental note to find her later and have a chat about being small. _Soulmates, such nonsense._ Finally, they end up at a small nook. Louis looks up and his heart stops. 

“Happy Birthday!!!!!!” Louis almost falls backwards from the cheers of his friends, and he blushes when he catches the sight of so many of them coming out just for him! There’s a small banner hanging from the wine-seller-like arch the table is located in, it reads ‘Tommo 19. Congrats!’

“Celebrating the Tommo!” Niall raises his glass, and Louis runs over to fall into a hug of Oli, Luke and Stan, who made the way from Doncaster.

“Ye came?” Louis asks, and he has to hide the small tear of relief in Oli’s arm. 

“Course we did, mate!” Stan chuckles while he almost breaks Louis’ back clapping it harshly. “Make the lad a drink, Nialler!” Niall takes the advice and makes Louis a drink with over-large vodka bottle. 

“Cheers, fuckers. Merci for comin’ out for me birthday!” Louis thanks his friends for joining them tonight. He tips the glass back and gulps the content down. It burns deliciously inside his throat like fire. Eleanor rushes forward to give him a peck on the cheek, promising to get his gift to him by his actual birthday, right before Max collects her in his arms and ushers her to the dance floor. 

“My turn!” Stan calls and rips Louis back right next to him. He still hadn’t had the chance to properly sit down, nor to lose his jacket. Stan slivers over a small envelope, the first thing going through Louis’ head is money. But once he opens it about a dozen condoms fall out of the envelope. Louis has to laugh, “I’ll need this, cheers mate.” 

“I made a guess with the size.” Stan giggles into his shoulder. Louis just rolls his eyes and stuffs them into his coat. He shrugs out of the jacket and throws it over someone’s face he doesn’t like nearly enough for being here. From his other friends he gets a puma gift card, so he can buy himself new cleats, since his old ones are practically falling apart on the seams.

“Vodka’s empty.” Calum says, wiggling the bottle. 

“Oh God! Let’s play spin the bottle.” Perrie giggles, but three’s a collective moan from all around her. Jade joins her giggle and kisses her cheek proudly.

“So ye broke it off with yer girl?” Stan asks him, when the bottle starts spinning and spilling over the table.

“Yeah. Was enough ye kna. She got a new man anyway.” Louis says and shrugs. They both look over to Eleanor leaning into Max in their dancing embrace. She looks happier than ever, and it feels better than ever for giving this part of his life up. At least one of them found their person.

“Already?” Oli sips on his warm beer, and leisurely leans in to kiss a red-haired girl. She hadn’t been sitting at their table, but the bottle didn’t point to anyone, so he just pulled her in. She seemed to enjoy it on her part. 

“Yeah.” Louis says. 

“Ginger kisses Ginger.” Stan giggles next to him, and the bottle falls on him. 

“Ginger kisses Stan.” Louis hits him on the back just as Stan leans forward to kiss the red-haired girl, causing their teeth to clash against each other. Stan kicks at Louis who falls to the side, and lands on his bum next to the bench, but he continues to spin the bottle. Louis grumbles when he sits back down next to Stan. The head of the bottle lands on Louis as he sits back up again. _shit._

“Gimme a smooch Tommo.” Stan grins. Louis leans over and gives him a quick peck to the lips. “Tha’ was grand!” Louis rolls his eyes but rubs the back of his hand over the lips. 

“Shite!” Louis hears Niall say, and Stan nods behind Louis. _Harry._ He’s near Eleanor on the dance floor, with Danielle close to his side. His hair slightly damp on his forehead from the exercise. He’s wearing his wide white pants, he wore for their date, along with what looks like a crop top. His green eyes are trained on Louis lips and follow to Stan’s face. Niall tumbles over his friends, shoving his crotch into their faces while he struggles to get from the middle of the alcove to the end of it. Louis doesn’t move. And he ignores the hurt in Harry’s eyes. He sniffles a bit when he turns his back on him.

His heart rate is erratic, and he wishes he could just run to him. _No, wait, what? I don’t want to run to him!_ _Really! I don’t!_ “Alright there Tommo?” Stan whispers, as good as someone can whisper in a club. Jade and Perrie are already smooching, and Liam and Zayn have moved off to join El and Max. 

“Just fine.” Louis replies even if his voice breaks. Stan wants to say something soothing, when a small person with dark hair squeezes in between them. 

“Hi there.” Danielle grins at him.

“Hi, Dani. Ye came t’ me party?” Louis sips another drink in order to get his voice working again. 

Danielle grins at him, “heard about it from Harry. I was surprised I didn’t get an invite.” 

“Was a surprise party Danielle. I didn’t control the guest list.” Louis says, watching Jade and Perrie kiss in front of him.

“That explains it then.” Danielle says, smiling mischievously.

“Suppose so.” Louis says, irritated by her sudden odd behaviour.She keeps blinking at him from underneath her eyelashes. “What is happenin’?” 

“I know.” Danielle says.

“Knaw what?” Louis asks, his heart already doing double leaps in his chest. _Wha’ could she possibly kna?_

“About your feelings of course.” She rapidly blinks at him.

“Me feelin’?” Louis can feel himself panic, his breathing becoming too shallow. He feels a hand rub up on his thigh, _oh shit no. No Danielle!_ He screams at her in his head.

“I see the way you look at me.” Danielle says. Louis gently takes her hand before it can move to the junction of his leg. 

“Daniell, I don’t ‘ave feelin’ for ye. I’m sorry.” Louis says, holding on to her hand.

“There is no denying it, Louis. I see the way you get jealous of Harry, whenever I dance with him at parties.” She says and winks. Louis can honestly say he has never noticed her dancing with Harry. As cheesy as it is, when he catches a glimpse of Harry in any packed room, he’ll only see him. The rest of the world falls away. The other people simply disappear in a fog. 

“I…” Louis can’t really tell Danielle he never saw her, because Harry is all he can see. “Danielle, I think there’s a misunderstanding. I don’t ‘ave feelin’ for ye. Trust me, it’ll be easier if I did, but I don’t. There’s someone out there for ye, but it ain’t me.” Danielle’s face falls and she sits up. 

“Oh…” She says, only now realising what he is saying. “I’m sorry, this is terribly embarrassing.” 

“Nah,” Louis says cheekily. “It’s an honour.” Louis kisses the back of her hand. She smiles, her face very red. 

“You are handsome.” She says, leaning forward to give him the second kiss of the night. “Happy Birthday Louis. I’m going to disappear now, so my shame can vanish.”

Louis chuckles watching her disappear within a group of people. “She took tha’ quite well, don’t ye think?” Stan asks.

Louis shrugs, grabs Stan’s hand, “want t’ dance?” 

“But, what about…? Sure.” He says resigned to his fate. Louis gets him up and starts rubbing his bum against him on the dance floor. “Lou… the hell?” Stan grabs his waist and tries to free his bulge from Louis’ heavy grinding.

“I just need this tonight please.” Louis whines against his ear, after getting flipped to face Stan.

“Then find Luke!” Stan says harshly. “We don’t do this… especially not when ye want to fock curly boy over there.” 

Louis shakes his head, “no curly!” Louis says a few other things Stan can’t hear. He calls Luke over and Luke sneaks behind Louis. 

“He’s killin’ ye with his eyes.” Stan says to Luke as soon as they embrace. 

“This ain’t a sodomite club. Go somewhere else, where pink fairies fly or somethin’!” A guy calls, and Louis simply flips him off. 

“Ye’re just mad yer Sissy ain’t got a bum like mine.” Louis calls over. In his defence, the girl really does have a flat bum. Louis turns and wiggles his bum in the man’s face. He looks up to see Harry watching him, lean over and his bum in someone’s face. Louis blushes a little and quickly straightens. Harry marches over to him until he’s looking down at Louis. “Wha’?”

“I just… I got you a present… I wanted to bring it by, but I’d have to come over…” Harry looks sad, circles darkening under his eyes. He’s gnawing on his lips, “Grimmy and I…there’s nothing there.” 

“Save it, Styles!” Louis says, grabs for Luke’s arms and makes him hug him from behind. “Ye met Luke? The boy who’s with me in Ibiza?” Louis asks, aware of how cruel it is. He can see Harry swallow and his eyes raking over Luke’s form. 

“I… hi?” Harry says, water already filling his eyes. “There’s… ehm.” Harry wipes at his eyes, “Nick has a sauna in his house… that’s all.” _Harry was naked with only a towel. Nick was sweating and half naked._

“Ye expect me to believe tha’ Norwegian bullocks?” Louis asks, shaking away the memory of the painful moment. His bum still has sympathy pains whenever he thinks of it.

“Saunas are from Finland.” Harry says, but his voice breaks. “Enjoy your night Lou.” He turns around and disappears in a sea of people. Louis swallows down the tears forming on his eyes. Luke is trying to hug him tighter, but Louis breaks free to walk back to the table and gulps a glass of pure whiskey down his throat. 

“Shit, thank God it’s not vodka! That would burn!” Josh says, he was footie coach last year. 

“Should’ve been.” Louis says and angrily rubs away the tears drifting on their own accord. “So done cryin’!” 

“Mate are you okay?” Josh asks and rubs his shoulder in a proactive measure. 

“I need more pain.” Louis says, staring at the four empty bottles on his table.

“Ehm… Louis?” Josh sounds conflicted. “Who are you here with?” 

“Everyone, it’s me birthday.” Louis says, as if he had to explain 1+1 to him.

“Louis this isn’t a good idea.” Josh says. “Calum!” Calum comes to a halt next to them. “You know where Payno is?”

Calum brushes his hair, which is growing out longer. “The loo, last I checked.” 

“Can you go get him? I think we need a chaperon for Louis.”

“Don’t!” Louis mumbles, leaning into Josh’s side. He didn’t realise how drunk he had got.

“No bloody way!” Calum shakes his head and takes a swig from his beer, he held in his right hand. Louis hadn’t even realised he had it in his hand all this time. “He’s getting sucked off by someone.” 

“Bastard.” Louis mumbles into Josh’s neck. _I want to get sucked off by someone. It’s my birthday that’s only fair._

“Your birthday is like in three days, Louis! So let’s just stave off that demand.” Calum chuckles.

“I said that out loud?” Louis whines.

“Yep.” Josh laughs, popping the p. _Thank God I didn’t mention Curly!_

“I didn’t say that out loud did I?” Louis asks.

“What?” The other boys look at him confused. “Payno!” Josh squeals circling his arms like a windmill. 

Louis catches sight of Liam falling out of the loo, still busy stuffing his shirt into his pants. “What’s up?” He asks as soon as he reaches them.

“Ye stink.” Louis giggles. 

“Cheers.” Liam shakes his head. “What’s wrong with you?” 

“He wants pain.” Josh says. _Oh, right! Tha’ what this is all about. The pain…oh…the pain._

“We’re not getting you any more alcohol.” Zayn says, appearing out of nowhere. _Where did he come from?_

“I want a tatt—oooo!” Louis sings. 

“A tattoo?” Liam asks, “you’ll regret that in the morning.” 

“Wait and see, Payno!” Louis whines, and grabs his jacket, “come on lets go.” 

“Hey wait!” Jade and Perrie run after them, once Calum, Liam, Josh, Stan, Luke and Louis have made it outside. “Why would you leave without us? Worst friends ever!” 

“We’re getting tattooos!” Louis says. 

“All of you?” Perrie asks and links her hand in Perries.

“No.”

“Yes.” Louis shakes his head over his stupid friends and crosses the street without a care in the world. A loud screeching sound comes from a car stopping in front of Louis.

“The fuck, mate? Don’t you have eyes?” The driver yells out of his window. 

“Didn’t bring me glasses, sorry.” Louis shrugs and passes to the pavement. Liam apologises to the driver, but Louis stubbornly walks a few houses down, he remembers seeing a studio. 

“We got t’ head home Lou.” Stan says, nodding to Oli and Luke. “Next bus is in five.” 

“Cheers for comin’ ye losers. Merry Christmas to every single bum of ye.” His friends laugh, and he hugs them in tandem. “Cheers for doin’ this.” Louis says to Stan.

“All Liam, mate. Should kiss his ass, not mine.” Stan grins into Louis hair. Louis watches them leave, before he walks into a tattoo studio. The sign reads _Lola’s fairy studio!_ Louis giggles, _that’s like tha’ idiot in the club._

“Hi.” A woman with about a hundred piercings in her face says. “I’m Lola. Someone want a tattoo?” 

“YES!” Louis says enthusiastically. 

“Alright, what will it be?” She asks and gets a few sample books out from underneath her desk.

“A broken heart in black.” Louis says. “And a stag.” 

“It doesn’t make sense Louis. Why a stag?” Jade asks while she chews on her hair. Her phone buzzes in her pocket and reaches in to take it out.

“The club was a stag.” Louis says as if it were the best answer to give. 

“Danielle is mad we left her at the club alone.” Jade giggles to her phone.

“Shit.” Calum laughs, “why do Yankee’s get so lost?”

“Just send her our location.” Perrie says, flipping through the sample book.

“I’ll go get her.” Calum says and walks out the door.

“A stag is powerful and strong, while also representing the Goddess Artemis, it’s a good choice.” Lola brings the attention back to herself. “Where?”

“The heart on me shoulder, and the stag all over me arm.” Louis says.

“That’ll hurt.” Lola says. 

“I’m totally drunk… won’t hurt a bit.” Louis giggles.

“I’ll hold his hand.” Jade says. 

“Can I have one too?” Liam suddenly asks. 

“Since when do you want a tattoo?” Zayn asks him. _He looks a bit endeared, maybe even proud_ , Louis can deduce through the thick blind drunk of his mind. 

“What off?” Lola asks.

“Four V’s on right forearm, please.” He points there.

“Why?” Zayn asks him, a crease crinkling his eye in affection. 

“Represent everyone of my best friends.” Liam says. Jade and Perrie coo in unison. _He said four, right? Me, obviously. Tha’s one. Zayn. That’s Two. Niall, I think, that’s three. Who’s the fourth. Zayn, Me, Niall. Niall, Zayn and Me. Maybe I’m bad at math right now._ Louis rubs at his temple before he joins Lola to head back.

A few hours later Liam is screaming like a baby. “Lou!” Liam reaches him. His phone in his hand is blaring an alarm. “The bus, we got to go!” Louis suddenly understands the importance of his freaking out. He hurries up flipping his bills on the counter. 

“How much cash have you got with you?” Calum asks surprised. Danielle is leaning into his side, her eyes closed by half.

“Got done in the nick of time, aye?” Louis asks, as they rush outside. 

They’re walking through the streets, everyone following Liam, who is the only one who has a clue where they have to be. It’s a cold December night, and Louis pulls the sipper all the way to his chin. Cold icy air travelling underneath his jacket. Liam is talking next to him, which Louis decides to ignore for a moment. A few houses ahead, he sees a rose bush glimmering from the frost it’s clouded within. As they pass Louis grabs one of them and pulls it off of a branch. 

“Here we are. This is where it should come in three minutes.” Liam says. Louis lets his bum fall to the curb. The others start chatting among themselves, marvelling at the tattoo’s and the night as a whole.

“He loves me.” Louis throws a pedal to the floor, “he loves me not.” Another red pedal falls to the pile on the floor. 

“Louis what are you doing?” Liam asks, he leans down to look at Louis. He tries to take away his rose.

“No! Bad luck if I don’t finish.” Louis mumbles. 

“I’m sure you made that up.” Liam says, but lets Louis continue his spiel. 

Louis shrugs, “probably did.” They grin at each other, when the last pedal falls to the floor.

“What was it then?” Liam asks. 

“What?” 

“The last pedal? Was it he loves you or he loves you not?” Liam asks.

“He loves me.” Louis says. He stands up and starts stomping on the pile of pedals. 

“Eh? Louis?” Liam asks, unsure what to do right now. He’s not the most sober either, and his usual manner of daddy-protection is missing. Heck, he enjoyed getting smashed himself. Their friends turn to stare at him too.

“It’s a lie, this rose pedal thing is a lie.” Louis says while he surges the red colour over the floor. “Ye jinxed it, ye idiot.” Louis concludes before he staggers back down the road.

“Louis…?” He hears Zayn scream after him. The girls giggle follows down the road.

“Maybe you should slow down, yeah?” Liam asks, grabbing a hold of his arm. “The bus is this way.” With an astonishing ease, he turns Louis around on his axes by his shoulder. They walk back to the bus stop, Louis tries to ignore the small pile of rose pedals. 

“Did ye kna he was playin’ me?” Louis mumbles, while he tries leaning against the pole of the bus stop. He loses his balance and crashes to the ground. “OW!” He whines, “me bum!” Liam laughs, leaning forward. “Help me up.” 

Calum is still laughing when he helps back to his feet. The bus comes to a stop next to them and Liam gets in first. Louis searches through his own coat, looking for his ticket, which is currently in Liam’s hand. He grabs something and pulls it out “ta-da! Me ticket.” 

“He’s kiddin’ right?” The bus driver asks looking past Liam at Louis who is proudly holding a purple condom into the air.

“Put that away.” Liam says, tugging at Louis elbow. Louis can feel his face heat up, and he quickly pushes them back into his pockets. When he rips his hands out again, the entire floor litters with condoms. Louis can feel himself heat up even more, and he crouches down to pick the packages up. 

Liam is chuckling and tries to divert the attention of the bus driver away from Louis. “He ain’t goin’ puke is he?” The driver asks.

“He’ll be fine.” Liam says and pushes Louis into the back. 

“Liyum!” Louis whines, when Liam pushes him into the second to last seat. “I’m sorry.” Louis mumbles and pushes his knees into his arms. His back shivers, from the cold window pressing all along his back. He curls in on himself and blinks up at Liam, who is watching him. “Tha’ was embarrassing.” 

“Was actually quite funny.” Liam snickers and the bus starts rolling forward. “I will set us an alarm clock, just in case we fall asleep.” He says, Louis looks around their friends already leaning into each other to take a nap.

“Ye think of everythin’, don’t ye, daddy.” Louis giggles. Liam blushes and squirms in his seat while he tries to set the alarm with quivering hands. Louis’ feet slipping out of his arms back to the ground. He wiggles his bum a bit until he’s seated at a better angle to stare at Liam.“Liyum?” 

“No.”

“Do ye ‘ave a daddy kink.” Louis giggles. He can feel Zayn peak at him from the seat in front of him.

“Never, mate.” Liam says, still pretending he’s doing something on his phone.

“I mean we say tha’, ‘cause it’s funny.” Louis giggles. “But ye actually like hearin’ it, aye?”

“Fuck off.” Liam cries, and then says “I bet Harry whines ‘daddy’ too.” 

Louis sits up straighter, “no he doesn’t! Has anyone said he does?” 

“No.” Liam says quickly. He looks up front, but Zayn and Calum’s heads have fallen against each other, and a slight snoring can be heard.

“Who else has Harry been with?” Louis asks, his heart plummeting down to his shorts. 

“What? No one.” Liam says, a bit surprised by the sudden change of conversation.

“You’re squirming.” Louis says and pokes his side. It’s the most effective way of getting what he wants from Liam. 

“I’m not. Louis leave it.” Liam says, trying to elbow Louis’ finger out of the way.

“Who has he been with?” Louis asks, his hands are sweating, and he can feel his heart pumping in his ears. “Tell me.”

“He’s not been with anyone, Louis! I mean except for you!” Liam says shifting on his seat, so he’s staring into Louis eyes. “But you already know you’re not the only one who ever kissed him.” 

“I know Nick sucked him off, thank you very much!” Louis says, crossing his arms over his chest and pouting. He hates thinking of that doped shit going down for _his_ boy. 

“Yeah…” Liam says, rolling his eyes and shifting, so he’s looking back to the front of the bus. Louis can feel the sweet irritation rolling off of Liam. “What do ye mean?“

Annoyed Liam huffs, “I’m saying Harry gets kissed all the time!” 

“By girls?” Louis asks, crossing his fingers behind his back.

“Yes, but more by guys.” Liam says, scratching his chin. Louis sighs, unhooking his fingers again.

“I thought it was impossible to find another gay in Cheshire.” Louis says, furrowing his brow. He pokes Liam again, just to get him to talk faster.

“Lou.” Liam says with an alarming ring “H is the gay boy in town, so everyone else who are questioning themselves have secluded him during a party or whatever and kissed him. And Harry is Harry, he loves kissing. He just doesn’t like when they grope him.”

Louis blinks at him, “who?”

Liam shakes his head, “no way. Not telling you.”

“Tell me!” Louis pokes Liam into the sides multiple times. Liam whales he’s too drunk to withstand Louis perseverance. 

“Just a few guys.” Liam tries to weasel himself out of the conversation.

“Who?” Louis won’t let up. “Liyum I can be pushy when I want to be!” 

“Argh,” Liam throws his head back against the backrest. “Hemmings, do you remember Wayne from last year on our footie team? Him too. Nick right before he came out for real…”

Louis hears Liam’s voice hitch, a breathy little thing which indicates he has another name on the tip of his tongue. “Who else?" Louis asks.

“I told you all I know.” Liam’s voice shakes.

“Bullshit there’s a name right on your tongue.” 

“No there isn’t.” 

“MATE!” Louis starts poking him again. Liam looks uncomfortable and checks that their friends have all fallen asleep. Again.

“Fine, fine, fine, it was Zayn! Okay?” Liam says against towards the roof of the bus.

Louis sits up abruptly the world is spinning and there are black splotches in front of his eyes. “Wha’? Zayn? When?”

“A couple of weeks ago... Haz said he looked so down after coming home from rehab he needed a friend and… I don’t know… I suppose Z kissed him. They kissed a few times, actually.” Liam says, his eyes going back to ogle Louis’ reaction. 

“So while I was tryin’ t’ win back me love, me best friend was snoggin' him?” Louis squeals. His vision gets worse, and he closes his eyes painfully. He’s not sure he still has a heart, as it drops and shatters at the bottom of his feet. Or he might just have forgotten to breathe for a moment. He can’t tell. 

“Look, Louis, I don’t think Zayn…”

He turns his back on Liam curls himself like a cat. “Please, shut up Liam!” Louis whispers into the crook of his arm. His feet are perked up on the seat, and he makes himself as small as possible. His heart is beating too fast.

“Should’ve never told you!” Liam whispered to himself.

“I’m glad ye did,” Louis whispers back. The tears are already pooling at the closed gates of his eyes. Suddenly there’s an arm snaking around his middle and Liam pulls the ball of Louis against his chest. His head lands on Louis shoulder and he’s hugging him tight.

“We shouldn’t…” Louis warns.

“Let them call me a fag. I don’t care. My friend needs a cuddle!” Liam mumbles against his shoulder.

Louis’ throat clogs up, “if ye hug me, I’ll cry.” His voice is already cracking.

“You don’t have to be tough all the time. It’s okay to cry.” Liam kisses his shoulder softly.

“I don’t want to cry. I’m so done crying,” he whines when the first tears spill over his face.

“I know Lou. I’m sorry you deserve better.” Liam says, his breath fanning over Louis’ cheek.

“No I don’t.” Louis whispers to himself, so silently, Liam can’t hear or revoke it.

💚🍑💙

A few days before Christmas Louis is working at Bell’s again. Timothy’s hair is still in a blonde bun on top of his head, so no one can complain about hair in their food. It’s a drowsy night, and the most they do is talk about music and Louis’ birthday. 

There’s currently a couple eating out of each other’s hands in the far-right corner, when the small bell rings. Louis looks over to see Harry come in. Louis automatically falls to the knees. “Did you lose something?” Timothy laughs. 

“Shhh…” Louis gasps. “I’m not here!” He can see Tim raise an eyebrow at him. Louis crawls forward to the small empty cupboard and squeezes himself into it. It makes a creaking sound when the door shuts. 

“How can I help you?” Tim asks Harry. 

“I… I’m actually looking for Louis!? Is he around?” Harry asks. Louis imagines him twirling one of his rings on his finger while staring at Tim. They are practically the same height.

“Sorry, mate. He’s not working tonight.” Tim says, leaning his weight on the surface above Louis, causing the weak material to bend down against Louis’ head. He’s not in the place to argue. 

“Oh.” Harry sounds dejected. 

“He had an early shift.” Tim says, further. “There anything I can tell him?” 

“Ehm…” Harry thinks for a while, and Louis can feel his knees ache and beg to be stretched again. “Just tell him Harry is looking for him. I need to explain some things.”

“Sure… I’ll do that.” Tim says, and Louis can hear the smile in his voice.

“Alright. Thanks.” Louis can hear Harry’s feet walking away. He opens the cupboard door to stare at Tim’s long legs in front of him. 

“Oh and Harry.” Tim says. Louis swears to himself. 

“Yeah?” Harry asks.

“Louis cares about you. Don’t give up.” Louis can see Timothy grin and wink. _That bastard._ Louis waits until he hears the bell ring again. “You know when I said you could fit in that thing, I was joking.” Louis remembers when he was joking with Timothy about Louis’ height on their first shift together. 

Louis unfolds himself out of the cupboard and falls to the ground with a loud thud. “Why’d ye tell him not to give up, ye wanker?” 

“Why else would you hide in a cupboard when the lad comes around, other than if you miss him.” Tim says. Louis hates how true the words are.

Tim starts talking to a customer, who wants more of the special sauce. Louis fishes out his phone. His fingers shake over the button. He stares down at Harry’s name and unblocks Harry’s number.

Louis has been having nightmares. He sees Harry standing half naked on the dance floor, staring at him with sad tired eyes, Nick’s hands groping at his body from behind. Louis wakes up every night around three with a beating heart and sweat dripping down his back. Fear freezing in his veins. It’s the same, the night Louis came home from work. He almost jumps out of his skin when his phone buzzes next to him. He untangles himself from the headphones he had put in to fall asleep to soothing music. Unlike his hopes they did nothing for his nightmares. 

The light of his phone is too bright, and Louis can’t read the name on it. He ignores it, just to hear it buzz again. Louis picks up “Hello?”

“Louis!” Harry’s voice beams through the speaker.

“Yeah? It’s three am!” Louis complains. He doesn’t need to look at any clock. He knows this is the time he wakes up every day from his nightmares. “Wha’ do ye want?”

“I didn’t actually think you’d pick up. I don’t really know what to say now! … I mean… you unblocked me! I didn’t realise you unblocked me until now… I thought I’d give it a try.”

Louis scoffs into the speaker, his eyes drifting close again. He remembers the times when he laid next to Harry, listening to him talk to himself in his sleep. Lulling Louis into a soft sweet dream.

“I had to try again…” Harry rambles on. 

“Haz…” Louis mumbles, a little annoyed. “Again it’s three!”

“I’m… well… I don’t sleep too well, I guess you don’t either? Where are you?” Harry rambles on.

“Naked in me bed.” Louis grunts. He’s actually wearing his boxers, but Harry doesn’t need to know that. 

There is a short break, before Harry says “I’m looking at the stars and wondering what to wish for when one shoots by.”

“Really?” Louis asks and sits up, rubbing his finger over his face. 

“It's December, shooting stars season is in August and April.” Harry says slowly. “I thought it’s still worth a try.”

“Of course yer the kind of person who’d knaw tha’!” Louis stops himself from giggling.

Harry giggles for them both, “are ye looking at the stars?”

“No. I’m in bed, Harold.” Louis says, rolling his eyes. The dark curtains are too far away from his bed, and it’s so nice and warm in here.

“Look at the stars for me, boo.” Harry whispers.

“It’s freezing, and I’m naked.” Louis whines.

“Come on then. Since when do you hide away from a challenge.” Harry says.

There’s ruffling as Louis gets out of bed and slips behind the curtain to sit on the windowsill. It is very cold just sitting by the cold window.

“How long do you think the light of one star takes to get from me to you?” Harry asks.

“That makes no sense,” Louis snickers.

“Don’t ever think they get lonely up there?” Harry suddenly asks.

“That’s beautiful Harry,” Louis says, staring up at the twinkling little things.

“Sad isn’t it?” Harry asks. “We always look up at them, but no one ever wonders how they feel looking down at us. Do they feel lonely watching humans spend their time in merry gatherings?”

“I never really looked at the stars.” Louis says. “Not like that anyway.” 

“Hm…” Harry hums. “What did you look at then?” 

“Christmas lights.” Louis says and stares at the glittering lights of their neighbours. “When I was a kid, I thought they were for me birthday. All the lights just for me. Quite a shock when I found out their real meaning.”

“Oh.” Harry breaths, “I’ll hang some for you.” 

“Harry.” Louis says, tracing a small pattern over the foggy glass.

“Yeah?” Harry breathes.

“I miss ye.” Louis says.

“Louis?” Harry whispers.

“Yeah?” Louis lets himself smile.

“Don’t give up. Please.” Harry says, voice clogging up.

“How could I, when yer all I can think about?” Louis whispers, fear shoots through him again. _Why did I say that?_ He quickly hangs up before listening to Harry’s answer. Louis’ forehead falls against the window, _idiotic stupid cunt!_ Louis swears at himself. He looks up at the stars, “don’t be lonely little Harold.” He whispers, before slipping back into bed. Cursing that his feet are frozen like the glass he was pressing against. This night he sleeps until his mother wakes him. 

Louis and Dan moan loudly when they hoist the Christmas tree into an upright position. “A little more to the left.” Jay says and rubs her back.

“What are ye talking about, more to the right.” Fizzy says.

“No, I think mum is right, to the left.” Lottie says, cocking her head to the left. 

Louis and Dan stare at each other with slitted eyes, as their women try to play tug and pull with the tree. “Oi!” Louis finally stops them all, “mum’s got power! How do ye want it?” 

“A bit to the right.” She grins.

“Told ye so.” Fizzy says under her breath. 

“Now that’s perfect.” Jay says excited. Dan leans down, his knee making a cracking sound, and snaps the tree in place on the tree stand. He leans back up, and his knees make another crack. Louis is handed the scissors, so he can free the tree from its confinements. Louis cuts the string, and one of the branches slaps him on the cheek. He rubs it squinting at the tree accusatorially. The twins, in their pink dresses, clap as Lottie opens the small boxes to reveal the decorations. 

They spend the night, decorating the tree and the twins, with their mother, make some cookies for Santa. The girls slowly move upstairs, and Louis props his feet up and leans his head against the sofa cushion. “Honey,” his mother taps him against his feet. “Make room for yer old mother.”

“Not old mum.” Louis says and moves a little, so his mother can sit down next to him. 

“So I have a Christmas gift for you and your sisters, but I wanted to let you know first.” She says while Dan lets himself sit down with a groan. 

“Why? If it’s a gift, just keep it a secret.” Louis says with a bit of sass. His mother only chuckles.

“Honey, I’m a little afraid of how ye will react.” Jay says and leans over him to play with Louis’ fringe. 

Louis looks up at her, “well what is it? Trip to Disneyland?” 

Dan winks at Jay when she giggles again. She takes a deep breath, before she says, “I’m pregnant.” Louis coughs on his own spit. His mother is still playing with his fringe when she says, “we’re expanding the family.” 

“Again?” Louis asks. “I mean… congrats to both of ye.” He sounds a little solemn, it’s a bit of a shock. He wonders what gives his mother the strength to have children with each one of her partners. Louis leans forward and gives her a kiss to the cheek.

“Three months in case you were wondering. I wanted to be sure, before telling all of you.” She says shyly, before rubbing her stomach softly.

“Tha’ why ye stopped drinking wine t’ dinner?” Louis asks.

“Yes, and I never had an upset stomach. It was morning sickness every time.” She says and pats his cheek. 

“Mum, it’s great news. Congratulations Dan.” Louis stands up, “ye got pregnant on yer honeymoon, didn’t ye?” 

His mother blushes, “we think so. Yes.” 

“Naughty.” Louis shakes his head, winks and walks back upstairs. _What a mess_. It’s a shock to the system. Another baby in the house, selfishly he is a bit glad he will be off to Uni when the baby is small. He feels awful just thinking it, but he’s already been _her_ support system for the other four girls, it’s time for the girls to do it themselves this time. And what if it’s another girl? What if it’s a boy? Louis will lose his position as the only boy in the family. He’s not sure he’s ready for that. On the other hand he’ll always be the oldest. And tomorrow is his 19th birthday. Which is another thing; there will be a 19-year difference between him and this baby. _At least mum gets to start a-new again._

His birthday starts off with a bang, the door to his room flies open and almost shatters by colliding with the wall. Blonde hair curtains around him, while his youngest sisters squish him and sing Happy Birthday, loudly and badly, into his ear. “Alright, Alright get off.” Louis says, rubbing their backs. He kisses both of their red cheeks happily. There just such joys. 

He grabs for some trackies, before he lets them lead him downstairs by the hands. The table is beautifully decorated by Fizzy, and there are at least a dozen presents scattering the table. Louis lets them all hug him and smooch him. 

After taking a shower he helps the twins builda snowman with the very little snow which had fallen. “No, no, no higher Lou!” Phoebe squeals, jumping up and down. Her small feet make tiny crackling sounds when her feet break the frozen grass beneath her feet.

“We won’t ‘ave any snow left for the rest of him, love.” Louis reminds him.

“Who says it’s a boy?” Daisy asks, scratching her chin. 

“It’s in the name silly, it says snow-‘man’.” He punctuates man. 

“We could make the first snow-girl then.” Daisy says, cocking a hip. Louis pats the snow into place, so it won’t fall apart when he puts the next ball on top of the other. “Get her a pink bow and a scarf.”

“Get her hair too.” Louis mumbles.

“HA great idea!” Phoebe squeals excited. 

“Bullocks,” Louis says.

“Mum says not to use that language.” Phoebe immediately says.

“It is bullocks, dear one.” Louis says, grinning at her. “Get on with it, we still need more snow for  his upper body.” Daisy falls to her knees to start on the next part. 

“Oi, Oi, Tommo.” He hears someone say behind him, “back on your knees are you?” 

Louis turns around and squints when the sun peaks through the clouds into his eyes. “Payno?” 

“Happy Birthday, mate.” He slips down to the ground to gibe Louis a hug from the side. 

“Cheers. It’s Christmas, how are ye here? Ain’t yer mum takin’ attendance?” Louis asks him.

“Told her one of my best friends is celebrating a birthday.” Liam says, throwing a present into Liam’s lap.

“No one cares about the 19th Liam. 18th is the freedom-birthday, and the 20th is two-tens ye knaw, important… but the 19th? Just a useless in-betweener.” Louis says, “ye didn’t ‘ave t’ come, mate.”

“I wanted to.” Liam grins and leans down on the cold frost. 

“Open, open!” Phoebe leans over Louis’ shoulder to stare down at the unopened package lying in his lap.

“What is it?” Daisy asks.

“I got a clue for you, it is brown and sticky.” Liam says with a straight face, but start giggling a pathetic laugh. “It’s a joke.”

“Not too funny.” Louis says, before ripping the celebratory paper to shreds. He’s not the type of person to take his time with the wrapping paper. Louis stares down at his present unsure what to make of it. It’s a teddy bear. A rainbow-coloured teddy bear. He looks up at Liam, who is grinning from ear to ear. 

“Daisy look, Louis got a teddy bear.” Phoebe screams into his ear. Louis flinches. 

“Yeah, why?” Louis asks, turning the soft thing in his hand. 

“Because you belong to the rainbow people now, and you need something to cuddle. I saw it in a window and knew it was perfect.” Liam giggles, Daisy comes over with snow-girl’s second body part. Her eyes go wide when she sees the teddy bear and makes grabby hands at it. Louis is barely able to save the bear from her cold wet hands. 

“Ye only get t’ hold RB for a few seconds, and then ye ‘ave to dress yer snow-girl-man-thing.” Louis directs with a raised index finger.

“Fine.” Daisy says, blinking rapidly. Louis leans forward, but then passes the bear to her twin Phoebe. She giggles excitedly and rubs her face all over it.

“RB?” Liam asks, when they stand up to grab the snowball and lift it together. 

“Rainbow bear.” Louis says, “they always want to name everything. Even the toilet brush.” He shrugs. 

“Runs in the family then,” Liam grins. 

“I beg your pardon?” Louis says hoisting his hands on his hips. 

“Bertie?” Liam says like a question. 

“Right.” Louis throws his hands in the air and rolls his eyes at the same time. Liam chuckles, and Louis chases down his sister to get RB back into his possession. Embarrassingly, Liam was right, of course, he really could use a cuddle. He patted the head of the bear, when another car parked right in front of them, just as Daisy was strapping a purple thin bow around the head of the snow-girl, which made it look like it was choking. 

“Happy Birthday Loser!” Eleanor screamed over the front yard. Louis waved at her with the teddy bear still clutched in his hand. “Li, what are you doing here.” 

“Present time.” Liam says. “But I got to go.”

“No wait, me mum made eggnog, come in for a cuppa. Please.” Louis pointed over his shoulder with his thumb. 

“Eggnog. The Yank getting to you?” Eleanor giggled, before she made the girls squeal from the kisses they received.

“Dan made us watch a Christmas film, and she promised to make it for him. It’s quite good, got about two cups of whiskey in it.” Louis says, as they walk to the door.

“Why didn’t you lead with that?” Liam asks, making El giggle while they flick their shoes into a corner. Eleanor neatly folds her jacket and lays it out on the floor, because all the hooks were taken. 

“Hello Mrs. Jay.” Eleanor says and gives her a tight hug, before leaning her face over the cooking pot of eggnog. “Smells grand.” 

“Ye smell dazzling.” His mother says, sniffing Eleanor’s neck. Eleanor giggles and grabs for her purse. She produces a thick phallus shaped package.

“This isn’t a vibrator, right?” Louis asks.

“Louis!” His mother says horrified, while giving Louis a horrified look. 

“Had been a thought, but no. I think, maybe, I’ll get you that for Christmas.” She says while she pours herself a glass. Louis raises an eyebrow and rips the package off. “Ordered it as soon as you mentioned it.” Eleanor giggles. Louis raises the small Oscars-statute, the plague reads ‘Best fake Boyfriend ever’. His mother reads it, her eyebrows furrow. He never went into explaining the entire complex truth behind his relationship with Eleanor. He’s afraid she’d judge him for it, and worse, be ashamed.

“Cheers El.” He gives her a hug, before sliding a glass of eggnog to Liam. They settle down in the living room in front of the tree. “Thank you both for comin’, sucks being born on Christmas.” 

“Oh hush…” His mother leans over to kiss the crown of his head, “ye were the best Christmas present I could ever have asked for.” Eleanor coos. And Jay leaves them to it. 

“So how did yer mum react t’ the tattoo?” Louis asks Liam.

“There was a lot of crying.” Liam says, absent-mindedly he rubs over the tattooed skin. “I woke up in the morning after, I just literally forgot I got it. I woke up, looked at my arm, and I was like ‘oh no’. Then my mum saw it started crying. My dad came in, looked at it and went over to check on google how to get rid of them.” 

“You bloody can’t.” Eleanor says, chocking on her eggnog. 

“I know. So my dad wants me to get rid of it, but I just think… like it’s a part of me now.” He shrugs and rubs over it. 

“What does it stand for again?” Louis asks, blowing into his steaming cup.

“My four best friends.” Liam says, reaching for his eggnog himself. 

“Who do ye mean?” Louis asks, “‘cause ye got four, and I can’t figure it out.”

“Niall. Zayn. You. And Harry.” Liam says, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

“Harry is yer best friend, then?” Louis is tiny bit surprised. 

“Yes. For the last year, mate. Told you this before. We’ve been boxing together. Plus he likes to whine to me about how awful you have been to him.” Liam says.

“Don’t want t’ talk about tha’.” Louis says. “Not on me birthday.” 

“Done.” El says. 

“Zayn wanted to get you a gift, but wasn’t sure if he was allowed to.” Liam says.

“Don’t want t’ talk about tha’ either!” Louis says, and gulps down the hot liquid, almost burning himself in the process.

Louis gets a birthday cake after dinner. He cuts every one a small piece, because they already feel like they could roll over the floor for the rest of the night. They land in front of the TV and Louis orders his family to play charades. He gathers as the only actor in the family. He will be the best at it. Maybe that is why he wins, maybe they let him win to make him feel better. His mother still hasn’t told the girls about baby number 6, but Louis can finally see all the sings which were blaring him in the eye from the get go. 

Lottie helps the twins arrange a small platter of cookies they had baked the day before for Santa with some milk, before they get ushered upstairs. He has a last smoke with Dan outside, “sorry I wasn’t the nicest, I think its great news. First kids, mate.” Louis claps him on the back, which makes Dan go into a coughing fit. 

“Not my first kids. I think I did a good job raising you and your sisters for the last year.” Dan says, once he regained his voice.

“Yeah, tha’s just the test run. Having yer own kids is a little different. They love ye from the get go, we didn’t.” Louis chuckles. 

“So it’ll be easier, that’s great news.” Dan grins at him. 

“Yeah, Yeah. Keep tellin’ yourself tha’!” Louis squishes the bud beneath his foot. 

“Happy Birthday lad.” Dan says and gives him a tight hug. Louis dips his nose into the crook of his neck and inhales. It’s quite calming. “Sorry, your dad couldn’t be here.” 

“He’ll be here tomorrow morning, yeah?” Louis mumbles against his shoulder.

“Yes. I promise.” Dan says.

“Lesson number one, never promise anything to yer kids ye can’t control.” Louis pecks his cheek. He untangles himself, and walks back inside. His first birthday without his dad did hurt if he was being honest. He gets out of his clothes, placing RB next to his pillow and the Oscar on his bedside table. He slips beneath the sheets and breathes a sigh of relief when the second fluffy blanket snuggles him. Louis feels warm and content. 

He grabs his laptop and headphones. _It’s my birthday,_ Louis says to himself. _No harm in doing this_. He pops in the headphone-buds, he doesn’t want anyone hearing what he’s about to do. He has way too many nosy sisters as it is. He opens his last browser and finds the free porn site he found a few weeks ago. Louis also found a cute curly haired boy who looked so much like Harry, but his dimples were missing. Anyway, the boy did the job. He leans over to his bedside table to grab some lube he had invested in recently. 

Louis lets out a long moan, when his cold hand brushes his own member. Another boy spreads curly’s ass cheeks, slowly kissing him all along the crack. Louis’ hand speeds up, he’s more into the idea of Harry going down on himself, but he can’t find a video of curly, the porn star, being anything but submissive. His hand pulls a few more times, and Louis tries to moan through his nose.

A loud crash startles him, his hand rapidly moving out of his pants. Louis rips the earbuds out of their place and stares at the commotion coming from the end of his bed. “Ow.” A deep voice moans. 

“Who is there?” Louis asks, grabbing for the lamp on his bedside table. The blankets pool on his lap and the cold December air pickles his exposed torso. The black curtains move in the breeze chilling the room up too fast for Louis’ liking. Slowly crawling forward, self-consciously holding his comforter against his waist, Louis reaches the end of his bed. Someone looks up at him from the ground where they crashed. “HARRY?” 

“Lou? Why is it so bloody dark in here?” Harry says, rubbing his knees.

“My God Harry, I almost attacked ye with me lamp.” Louis wiggles the lamp in his hand, it makes a small cluttering noise. He deflates and lets it settle down next to him on the comforter. 

“Sorry, sorry.” Harry is holding up his hands in defeat. He’s dressed in black, with a small satchel hanging from his right shoulder. Louis’ can barely make him out from the light cast on them from his laptop. “Didn’t realise I was that uncoordinated when it comes to climbing through windows. 

Louis’ sits back down, feeling his heels dig into his bum cheeks. “Obviously.” Louis says numbly. He can’t believe he’s staring at Harry. On Christmas Eve. In his room. Dressed like a mix of a God and a baby girl.

“Happy Birthday, Lou.” Harry says shyly, rubbing the back of his head. The small pink bow hugging the half bun on the top of his head jitters from the movement. 

Louis blinks at him a couple of time, “cheers.” There’s a small silence while Louis stares at him, Harry’s eyes drift all over the place. He’s unable to focus on one specific thing, Louis’ black furniture, the small Polaroids of his family and friends in Doncaster, Louis’ naked chest. His eyes drift to his new tattoo, the stag sitting proudly on his shoulder.

“That’s a sick get up.” Harry finally says.

“Obviously I wear it.” Louis conquers. He crawls back to the top of the bed, giving Harry a little bum show, and leans over the bedside table to get the lamp back into its socket. He clicks the little bud, and the room is bathed in a yellowish sunny glow. Louis looks back at Harry, who is blushing the same colour as his bow, and quickly casts his eyes down to appear as if he didn’t just openly stare at Louis’ bum. “Why are ye here, lovely?” 

“Oh…” Harry says, looking back up at him. “Right, I have a present for you.” He says excitedly. 

“Okay.” Louis says, holding out his hand to receive his gift. Harry furrows his brow to stare at the hand.

“Not that kind of gift.” Harry says. Louis’ hand falls down against his thigh. “Just close your eyes. I have something planned.”

“Close me eyes? “ Louis repeats, unsure if he’s willing to do it. He wasn’t blessed with a lot of patients. 

“Just trust me for a moment!” Harry begs. Louis raises an eyebrow, but closes his eyes and lifts his hands to cover them as well. “Thank you.” Harry says out of breath and starts ruffling with his bag. There is rustling noises, a long time of quiet and a few clinging sounds. 

“Haz, what exactly are ye doin’?” Louis asks, “it ain’t like yer building it right?” 

“No, no. I’m just not the most coordinated, sorry.” Harry babbles. “I got inspired by something you said to me…ouch…” There is a sucking sound and Louis imagines him taking his thumb between his cherub lips. “… had a real good idea… and like I said at Brentwoods, I have a gift for you.” 

“Sure.” Louis says and bites his lip. “Why is it taking so long, though?” 

“Sorry… again… just a few more seconds.” Harry says, and there is a clicking sound. Light flashes behind his closed eyes. _Bloody hell, wha’ is he doin’?_ “Okay. Wait.” The blankets get lifted off of his lap. Gentle hands grab him under his knees and pulls him forward. His feet touch the ground.

“Haarehh!” Louis whines, Harry’s hands are very cold from the outside. But the taller boy only chuckles, his breath skipping over his lips. 

“Okay… stand up.” Harry says and helps him stand up by gently holding on to his elbows. Louis stands on his feet, toes curling against the cold floor. “Open.” Harry says.

Louis lets his hands drop to his sides and his eyes catch the light of three fairy light wires. Harry chose the wall next to his door, a fairy light wire swirls around his door. The other two are randomly slung around the wall to light up the 50 photographies hanging against the wall. After a nervous look to Harry, he steps closer. They are photos of fifty different houses and their colourful Christmas lights. “Christmas lights?” Louis asks, caught of guard.

“Yes.” Harry says excitedly, less confident he adds, “lights for Louis. All the lights just for your birthday, just like when you were a kid.” 

In the middle of them all Louis sees Harry’s house. He turns around to Harry with slightly glassy eyes. “Thank you Haz.” He storms into a hug. Harry snuggles his nose into the crook of his neck and Louis grins into the air, letting one of the curls tickle the side of his face. “Must ‘ave taken forever.” Louis says.

“Worth it.” Harry says, his lips sliding against his neck. Louis shudders, arousal shooting through his neck. Subconsciously, he bares his neck to the other boy. A wet kiss is placed there. Louis’ hips rock forward, and a moan threatens to escape him, but he pulls off. “Sorry.” Harry says. 

“Don’t be.” Louis smiles up at him. “Hey? Ye got a camera with ye?” 

Harry nods his head, “just the Polaroid, though.” 

“It’ll be enough.” Louis reaches for the door and untangles one of the wires. 

“Hey… took me forever to do that.” Harry whines.

“Shush and get the camera.” Louis says. Harry walks back to where he discarded his bag and takes out a Polaroid camera. Louis waves him over, and they sit down against the pictures behind them. Louis sits up to tangle the lights in Harry’s hair. 

Harry giggles from the small tugs on his curls. “Louis?” 

“Shhh… ye look beautiful.” Louis says and pets his cheek. 

“You too.” Harry says, rubbing a hand over Louis’ chest and down his tummy. “Come here.” He tugs at Louis’ boxers. He’s afraid they will be ripped down his legs, so he slips into the nook of Harry’s arm. Harry raps one halo around Louis’ head. They grab the camera. “Smile.” Harry directs. Louis smiles, a bright white-toothed smile. Harry’s fingers are slow, and when he finally nears the trigger, Louis whips over and plants a kiss on Harry. 

Louis detaches quickly, leaving Harry’s lips wet and watches the Polaroid slowly slipping out of the small slit. Harry grabs it and wiggles it in the air a bit. “Does tha’ really help?” Louis asks watching the delicate wrist wiggle. 

“No. But it’s fun.” Harry grins, poking Louis in the ribs with his elbow. Louis chuckles, evading a light which threatens to poke him in the eye. They wait for the Polaroid to slowly fill in with colour. “There’s nothing between Nick and me.” Harry interrupts the silence. 

“I don’t want to know.” Louis says, he’d rather sit here and wait in comfortable silence. 

“No, don’t do that. I want… I need to explain… We need to communicate better, Lou.” Harry says, the hand which isn’t holding the Polaroid starts fiddling with his knee. “Nick kissed me once,” Harry says.

“Yeah, so did Zayn.” Louis mumbles, spiteful. 

“and… wait, how do you know that?” Harry interrupts. 

“It don’t matter.” Louis says, tiredly. 

Harry is staring a hole into his side, “he kissed me, when he came back from rehab. It was nothing. Like all the rest. Except for you.” Harry taps Louis’ knee, and Louis watches the spot rigorously. “Nick kissed me and sucked me off. That’s it. That day, we really were using his sauna. I don’t have a problem being naked around people, Lou. I’m proud of how I look, who I am. I’m not afraid of showing it either.” Harry gulps. His hand travels up Louis’ thick thigh, settling on holding him there, in an icy grip. “Zayn kissed me after rehab. He… I think he wanted to know why you were this way… you know? He wanted to understand you… why you were kissing boys. It’s why he told me about you in Ibiza.”

“Tha’ cunt.” Louis says. 

“He didn’t know about us, though. He didn’t know we were… well, what ever we were.” Harry continues. “When he tried to kiss me again, I put a stop to it. There was only you. There will always be… only you.” Harry says. Harry’s hand grabs for his jaw, and turns him to face each other. “Lou… please say something.” 

“I’m not mad at ye.” Louis finally says, staring into the sea of green. Relief flushes through them, his face relaxes a bit. “I’m mad at them… how dare they touch ye.” Harry scoffs. “Yer Me boy! Mine.” 

“Jesus, Lou!” Harry covers his face with his hands. The Polaroid is finished and resting against his temple. Louis carefully takes it out of his hand. 

“Will ye be me boy?” Louis asks, resting his forehead against Harry’s temple. 

“I want to say yes.” Harry says. He moves his head up to stare at him. “You promised me a couple of dates first, though.” 

Louis chuckles, “ye want to be wined and dined, Harold?” Harry shrugs. Louis kisses his eyelid. “I’ll wine and dine ye.” His lips slip over his cheek bone and rest on Harry’s lips. Harry packers him. “No one else, though.” Louis whispers against his lips.

“Promise.” Harry says, giving him another kiss. “No Eleanor any more!” He demands.

“Already done.” Louis says, sits up and swings a leg over his lap. The lights tug at his scalp, so he quickly frees himself from the halo. “I can’t come out.” 

“No problem.” Harry says, his hands gripping into his thick bum cheeks. “Oh Louis, please.” 

“I like it when ye beg, baby.” Louis says and dips into a proper kiss. Opening his mouth and slipping his tongue between Harry’s lips. Their eyes close, both hearts beating in the same rhythm. Their tongues touch and Harry moans, tipping his head back against the photography. Louis grabs his chin, so he won’t have to slip out. His teeth graze Harry’s lower lip, before sucking Harry’s lips back into his mouth. Their lips slide over each other, wet warm skin rubbing over the others. Louis moans too, when Harry reflexively grabs his bum and pulls him closer on top of his crotch. They separate with a smack. “Harry…” 

“I’m yours.” Harry blabbers, before Louis can continue. Louis chuckles, rubbing his thumb over Harry’s jaw. Harry leans back up to give Louis a very wet kiss. Louis topples on Harry’s thigh and would fall off completely if Harry’s long fingers didn’t still hold on to his bum, steadying him. Harry sits up on his knees, Louis slips his legs around him. He’s holding on tight, when Harry stands up, there is a ripping sound, and Louis moans loudly when Harry’s head gets pulled away from him. “Shit.” Harry says, “the lights, my hair, your wall.” Louis slips his hands into his hair and untangles the lights from the curls, letting the drop unceremoniously behind Harry’s back. As soon as he is free Harry walks them toward the bed. 

Louis hits the covers. His hands grab for Harry’s shoulders, but he pulls himself free to rip the blankets away from under him. Making them pile on the floor, Louis lies down easily and comfortably when Harry joins him. His hot lanky body aligns itself with Louis’. He grabs Louis jaw, tangling his middle finger in Louis’ baby hair growing at the back of his neck and attaching their lips together. Harry shifts his weight upward, letting his bum dip like in the worm breakdance move, and their crotches rub against each other. 

Louis sees a few stars. “Feel so good, Hazzah.” Louis moans, sinking his fingertips into Harry’s spine. Harry’s hand kneads down his side and grabs his hip so harshly, the white skin already turns red. Harry repeats the motion multiple times, rubbing his pelvis against Louis’. 

“Lou!” He moans against his skin. 

“Shh…” Louis begs. “Me family.” 

“Right, sorry.” Harry says, his eyes twinkle with mischief. And grinds against him again. Louis sounds like a strangled donkey when he moans through his nose and mouth at the same time. There’s just too much air inside him. Harry mouths at Louis’ neck, licking a fat stripe against him. Goosebumps form on Louis arms, and Louis tries to snatch at Harry’s earlobe. He sucks it in-between his lips. And Harry bucks again. “Shit.” 

Louis rocks up a couple of times, “I need ye.” He begs and rubs himself against Louis harshly. Harry hoists himself up, and supports himself on his forearms. He looks down Louis’ body, seeing the thick erection straining against their confinement. Louis gulps, Harry looks like a fucking prince. Like a God! And then there is him. Pudgy, wide-hipped, big-bummed Louis. _What does he really see in me?_

Harry uses his large hand to rub over his chest, and down to his tummy. He lays it down there, flat and hot, like he were cradling a baby bump. Louis squirms a bit and closes his eyes, _now he’ll be disgusted by me._ After all the times he’s been told he’s too fat, too unattractive to make out with. _I’ve had too much to eat today_ , he thinks, his stomach has bloated and pushes out obscenely. What he doesn’t expect is for Harry to say, “so beautiful. You are so beautiful Lou.” 

“I have a tummy.” Louis says. 

“No you don’t. Besides, I like it. Gives me something to hold on to.” Harry says, thinking of killing Eleanor for giving Louis such a bad body image complex. Louis blushes.

“You think you’re going to top me?” Louis says, his stomach is flipping around like a newborn. 

“I really don’t mind either way. I’m versatile.” Harry says. His hand slowly moving farther south, giving Louis a small tug on his cock. Heat pools in Louis’ stomach. Harry’s lips attach to the spot on his neck again and sucks hard. Louis’ toes curl, and he rubs himself against Harry’s left thigh, which was three times smaller than his own. Harry detaches, “that’ll show tomorrow.” He grins like a painter looking at his masterpiece. 

Louis shoved Harry a little, “Harry me dick is goin’ t’ fall off.” His heart in his throat, when Harry moves a bit, so he lies down next to him on his side. Intentions set on groping Louis for a few more minutes before going down on him. The second crash of the night almost gives Louis a heart attack. “Wha’ was tha’?” 

Harry moves. Louis whines from the loss of contact. He’s a bit needy, he realises once the sound escapes his lips. He can hear Harry chuckle, “you were watching porn?” Louis can feel an ice cold shower fall down his body. _bloody hell._ “You were jerking off to this?” Harry asks, putting the laptop down on Louis thighs. The video is still playing to Louis’ embarrassment. 

“Good. It’s not broken.” Louis rationalises and pretends like Harry hasn’t just seen his fantasy. 

“Louis… let’s see… rim job?” Harry asks. He looks surprised when his eyes clash with Louis’. Louis groans, in embarrassment this time, and covers his face with his hands. “You… ehm.” Harry clears his throat awkwardly. “You’ve never given one?” Louis peaks through his fingers, Harry is watching the video. 

“I…” Louis stops. “I haven’t, but…” His hands fall from his face. “That’s not why I was watching it.” Harry looks at him expectingly. 

“No judgement, here.” Harry says.

“I… was thinking… maybe ye could… t’ me.” Louis stumbles through the sentence. _Damn I never stumble! I want my sass back_! 

Harry leans down to kiss one of Louis’ nipples, “I want to.” Harry’s hand travels down the inside of his thigh. He lifts it to his face and kisses his kneecap. “Fuck me, I want to! Can we now?” 

“Oh, yes please.” Louis moans, squirming under Harry’s intense gaze. 

“You have to clean yourself first, though.” Harry says.

“I do?” Louis asks, a little fear shooting through his quivering body.

“Yes.”Harry chuckles. “Haven’t done this often, only like once. So you have to clean yourself. I can tell you how.”

“O-oh-okay.” Louis breathes out his acknowledgement.

“I can also show you how.” Harry giggles, “want me in the shower with you?”

“No.” Louis shoots out, “sorry. I just think some mysteries should stay in this relationship.” Harry chuckles, and agrees.

Louis stumbles out of the shower, his upped body red from the hot shower. His ass feels shaved, and his back hurts from the many ways he tried to bend to clean himself properly. The YouTube video he had been using as reference has played its last tune and an annoying add about facial hygiene is playing in the background. After towelling himself dry, he uses it to shield his lower body from view. With shaky legs he walks back into his room on his tiptoes. Outside his sister’s bedroom he takes a little stop, but no sounds come out. His heart calm some, at least this year the twins weren’t trying to catch Santa eat their cookies. The house remained silent.

The door clicked silently when he closed it behind him, one of the fair-light chains hanging in a small pile next to it. Louis’ blues find Harry. He’s lying naked on his bed, leisurely giving himself a tug now and again, watching something on Louis’ laptop. He looks up when he hears Louis enter and closes the laptop quickly. Carefully he moves to the edge of the bed and places the laptop safely on his night stand. Louis shuffles towards him, his fingers playing with the small knot which holds his towel up and around his waist. Harry spreads his legs, so Louis stands between them. The green eyes looking their fill of the round tummy, the tiny nipples sitting proudly on his perfectly formed pecks and the stag watching him from the arm. 

Slowly Harry caresses Louis’ arms and tangles their fingers together. He raises them towards his lips and kisses Louis’ knuckles, “alright there?” 

“Yeah.” Louis says breathlessly. 

“Good.” Harry grins, a twitch in his dimples give a small insight into his own nervous. “Can I see you?” He asks, remaining the gentlemen Louis knows him to be. 

“Yes.” Louis says, lifting his hands to place them on Harry’s shoulders. Harry’s lanky fingers fiddle with the tight knot, until with a quiet swear the towel finally drops to the ground. It reveals Louis’ hard 5-inch cock curving towards his pelvis. 

“So thick…” Harry mumbles before his fingers surround him and give him a few delicious tugs. Louis closes his eyes and gives off a muffled moan through his nose. Harry watches him for a few moments, his long erection bobbing from his arousal. “On your stomach boo.” Harry says.

Louis shuffles out of Harry’s grasp and face plants on his stomach, his heated cheeks stuffed into his pillow. Harry moves behind him and with his index finger he traces his spine. A few stray kisses follow it, until they reach the bottom of his spine. Louis wiggles his hips from side to side, letting his bum sway like a ship in heavy seas. Harry chuckles against his skin. “Come on…” Louis whines. Harry ignores him, and his teeth scrape the crown of his bum, before they reach back up to let his tongue dip into a small dent, which appears right above his arse-cheek. “Harry stop tha’.” Louis says, again Harry is paying attention to a part of him, which he hates the most. 

“You have dimples here.” Harry says, poking each dimple at the bottom of his spine.

“Harry their ugly, leave them alone and pay attention to me perfectly round bum.” Louis whines, looking back over his shoulder to face Harry. Harry is just sitting there, both thumbs dipped into his dimples, looking at him with large pupil-blown greens.

Harry shakes his head, curls bouncing against his cheeks. “You know,” he says and leans down to kiss them, dipping his tongue into his dimples. “They say people with dimples at the bottom of their spine have better orgasms.” He bites them slightly. “They aren’t ugly Lou. They allow you to have better orgasms than the rest of us. I’m jealous.” Louis rolls his eyes.

“Where did ye even hear tha’?” Louis asks, waggishness playing in his voice.

“Read it somewhere.” Harry says and spreads his cheeks. Louis shakily breathes in and waits for Harry’s lips to gently press a line of kisses all along the inside of his cheek, never getting near the place Louis want him to be. Anticipation courses through him. Louis could feel Harry smirk against his skin, when finally a wet tipped tongue traced the ring. Louis moans, all of his nerve-ending shooting pleasure through his body. 

“Hazzah!” He says way too loud for his own ears. 

“Greedy.” Harry mumbles, before he lets the tip sink past the muscle. He moans a little himself when he feels the tightness of Louis. Louis squirms, trying to rub his hard cock against the mattress. Harry slips out of him again.

“More.” Louis begs. “Don’t stop.” His legs were shaking from the tension in the thighs from keeping them in place. Harry’s tongue now flat like a board, licks up over his whole until he lands a delicate kiss to the end of his tail bone. Hot long licks follow over and over again. Harry’s lips finally settled on his rim, encircling it and his tongue swivelling over his muscle in circles. “Hareeh…” Louis says against the pillow, biting the soft fabric. His muscle gives in, opening just slightly more for Harry. Louis’ toes curl. 

Harry settles in, lying down on his stomach in between Louis’ legs. Rubbing his own pelvis into the mattress, he moans around Louis rim. His nose buried on his tail bone, breathing in Louis’ desperate sent. His tongue dips between the muscles again and moves in tiny circles inside him. Louis is struggling, his hips squirming, thighs shivering, toes curl and his hands struggle to get beneath his body to gain some relief. Louis was so damn responsive, and Harry groans heavenly, causing a little ripple to go through Louis too. “God your bum… Don’t touch yourself.” Harry warns him. “You’ll come untouched.” 

Louis face lifts out of the pillow it was buried in, hot tears marking his cheeks. “I ‘ave never.” 

“But you will with me,” Harry says confidently. He grips into Louis’ cheeks harder. Tongue dipping into him relentlessly. Louis moans loudly again, in an attempt to grab at something, he twists his body, so he can grab his curls. Harry moans, he loves getting his hair tugged. His tongue accelerates. 

“Har—ry!” Louis sobs needily.

Harry’s hand shoots up, moves Louis right leg. It bends and moves upward, so Harry can use the new leverage to grab his balls and rub them against each other. Louis lets go of Harry and moans into the pillow. “Come for me.” Harry says against his bum. Peppering the rim with kisses before delving back in. He rearranges his weight, allowing better leverage to rub Louis’ balls together. Louis is making staccato breaths against the pillow. “Want to hear you when you come.” Harry says. Louis shifts his left cheek on the pillow.

“Harr-… I’m… Oh Harrrraeehhhh…” Louis moans and shoots his release on his mattress. His body quivers like after quakes from the intensity of his orgasm. He’s breathing heavily. 

“Turn around.” Harry orders, and helps him flip onto his back. Come sticks to his back and itches, but it is long forgotten when Harry pushes his knees against Louis’ armpits and leans over him. Frantically he tugs on his own cock. Louis looks up at him with glazed eyes, still a bit red from the few tears of overstimulation which had run down his cheeks at some point. “You look so good. All fucked out. Only for me.” Harry moans, staring down at Louis’ parted lips. Louis’ right hand comes up to place it on Harry’s large left thigh. 

“Only for ye.” Louis echoes, he can feel his cock trying to twitch from the view. 

“Should take a Polaroid of you like this.” Harry moans, hand now jack-rabating over his length. 

“Harry…” Louis whimpers defeated. Harry’s stomach tightens, his balls move towards his body, before he comes. Spreading white come all over Louis’ face. Louis’ eyes are closed, when he feels some of the liquid blob down on his eyelid. Harry is breathing harshly, when he disappears. 

“Wait.” He says, somewhere at the door. A minute later, Louis hears a click and a small zzz-sound. Then he can feel a wet blanket rubbing over his face and stomach. Together they lift Louis to free his back from his own come and clean up the mattress. Harry peppers him with kisses when he lifts the blanket back on the bed and over Louis. They snuggle together lids only half-open. 

“Best birthday gift.” Louis mumbles against Harry temple. Harry hugs him tighter against his chest, his stomach tugged against Louis’. He crawls up to give Louis one last birthday kiss. “Do ye taste like mouthwash?” Louis asks confused. 

“Better stay clean.” Harry says, with an embarrassed smile. “You really have no idea about sex and hygiene.” Harry shakes his head, “don’t worry I can teach you.” 

“Wasn’t worried, Harold.” Louis says. “Do ye think we scared Santa away?” 

Harry giggles, “noooo…” he contemplates, “I think he appreciates the jolly.” Louis chuckles before falling asleep with his boy snuggled into his arms.

“Louis… time for presen-“ Jay cuts off when she enters her oldest son’s room. It smells musky and stale in his room. Also, there is something curly in his bed. At first, she thinks it’s a dog, but when her sons head shoots up to look at her, she can see a face fall off of his chest. “Ehm…” She hoists her hands on her hips and cocks them. “I thought we had a rule about people staying over.”

“Good Morning, Mrs. Jay.” Harry’s voice surprises her, when he sits up. He presses the blanket against his chest, barely covering his puffy nipples. 

“Harry?” Jay looks more than surprised. “Ehm…” 

“He surprised me last night, just fell asleep. Sorry mum.” Louis says to his mother. 

“What about your mother Harry? Anne will have a heart attack when she finds yer bed empty and cold.” She tsks. 

“I’ll get going.” Harry says and nods to himself with curls bobbing. “And…” He looks at her before lifting his arms over the covers to make a round motion over his belly. “Congratulations.” 

“Oh, thank you dear.” She blushes, “do get going. The twins are losing their minds having to wait for presents.” Jay says. She giggles a bit, “do greet yer mother for me.”

“Will do. Thank you. Merry Christmas.” Harry calls after her before she leaves. Harry cries in embarrassment and slithers down under the blankets again.

“Hey…” Louis says, “Haz, she won’t know any of what happened last night.” He digs around to find one of Harry’s limbs. Harry shyly looks up at him. Louis gives him a quick kiss. “How’d ye knaw about the pregnancy?”

“Eh… I have an affinity for it. Mrs. Jay was right though, I got to go.” Harry sits up again, glancing over to the bedroom door which is still open. He leans up to give Louis a kiss. Louis grabs Harry by the back of the neck, so they stay connected. He hums a moan against his lips, and his morning wood takes an interest. He reaches out and his hand collides with Harry’s tip. He squirms backwards. 

“No. I have to go. Gemma will freak.” Harry says and already falls out of bed. He moans when he rubs his naked bum to grab for his jeans. “And you are missing Christmas with your family.”

“Louis, mum said to call ye—“ Fizzy’s voice says, she stops in the door. Her eyes land on Harry’s naked cock bobbing in the air, while he tries to jump on one foot to get his leg into the skin-tight jeans. “Jesus!” She calls, raising her hands to cover her eyes and turn her back on him. “Too much information.” She squeals. Louis chuckles from his position on the bed, while Harry falls to the floor. Wincing one more time Harry tries to duck for cover behind Louis’ bed. “Mum says t’ get a move on. You’re missing the twins o-faces.”

“Yeah, fine. I’ll be down.” Louis says. Harry reappears, kneeling to look over the blankets at the door. 

With an evil chuckle Fizzy says, “congrats Louis. He’s a biiig keeper.” She jogs off, before Louis can react. 

Harry groans, his cheeks are a beautiful shade of tomato-red. Louis rubs his thumb over them, “it wasn’t tha’ bad.” 

“Sure it was. All she’ll ever know of me is my cock.” Harry whines. “She never liked talking to me, now she’ll like it even less.” 

“You’re overreactin’. Fizzy finds these things incredibly funny.” He leans down to give Harry another kiss. “I don’t think I can ever stop kissin’ ye.” 

“Not the time, Lewis.” Harry says and stands up to get his clothes on as fast as Louis has ever seen him. “I want to see o-faces.”

“Ye makin’ fun of me?” Louis asks, a little impressed for Harry to switch the board on his nickname ‘Harold’. 

“Yes.” Harry says, shrugging and smiling at him. “Do put those fairy lights back up.” He points to the small puddle next to the door. 

Louis jumps out of bed, “will I see ye today?” His cock dangles thickly and slightly curved to the right between his legs. Harry’s eyes quickly dash down to look at it.

“I can try to get out of the house, but I can’t promise anything.” Harry says, grabbing for his bag. He bobs on his feet, “we’re missing the o-faces, Lou. I want to see some o-faces!” He sounds so desperate, Louis has to chuckle a bit. 

“Keep yer pants on. They get a lot of presents, besides me mum wants to tell them about the baby today.” Louis says.

“Oh God. I’m the Grinch.” Harry ruffles his hair, while Louis grabs his pyjama. He only wears it on Christmas morning. Usually, he sleeps in his briefs, but on Christmas he finds this one red pyjama pair he pulls on. “I stole Christmas.” 

“Yeah, calm down, sweet pumps.” Louis says to him. Harry throws his hands in the air and heads for the window. “Ehm… Harold. Ye can use the front door this time.” 

“Right, sure.” Harry says. Louis tangles their hands together as they walk downstairs. The living room is already filled with laughter and excitement. The twins rip at two ends of a large present and the wrapping gives away. It reveals a boardgames with a spinner, which asks the player to dance different dance moves. 

“Do you like it?” Louis can hear his father ask.

“Yes, daddy.” The twins say in unison, before they turn to the next gift. Mark sighs, albeit with lips in a happy line on his face. 

“Louis come on,” Jay waves him over. Louis gives Harry’s hand a squeeze, he’s busy staring at all the happy o-faces the twins are making over two knitted mermaid tails. Mark looks up. 

“I’ll drive him home real quick.” Louis says, nodding towards the curly-haired boy. Mark’s eyes behind the tiny horn-rimmed glasses slip over to Harry and takes him in. 

“No. I’m sorry Harry, but no. Ye going to stay right here. Say goodbye to yer friend and give yer sisters their presents!” Jay shakes her head, before she turns to look at Fizzy unpacking a present. 

“Fine, come on Harry.” Louis drags Harry to the front door. 

“They look so cute.” Harry says to Louis, while Louis leans down to help Harry tie his shoelaces. 

“Ye look like a fockin’ Flamingo hopin’ on yer leg like tha’.” Louis chuckles, when Harry’s feet are finally tugged into his shoes. 

“Your dad is looking at me.” Harry says, Louis looks up to see Mark still staring Harry down. The way his eyes dart all over him, lets Louis know he’s trying to piece everything together. 

“Don’t worry about ‘im.” Louis says, finishing the bow on his shoelace.

“Does he know?” Harry asks, once Louis has stood up again. 

“Yes… not really… no.” Louis says, shaking his head.

“Well, you can tell me later.” Harry says, Louis pushes him towards the fresh-hold. Harry giggles, when he sees Daisy make love with her eyes to her present she’s holding. “They look so cute, Lou!” 

“Yes they tend to do tha’.” Louis chuckles, finally getting Harry out the door. “Merry Christmas, babe.” Louis says.

“Merry Christmas, Lou.” Harry says, nervously rubbing over his skin, where usually a ring sits.

“Come here.” Louis says, and grabs Harry one more time to kiss him. Their mouths open and Louis can feel Harry moan into him. Their tongues tangle, making the kiss to sloppy. 

“I think I should go…” Harry says against Louis lips. Louis pecks his nose.

“Send me love to the family.”

“Always.”

💚🍑💙

Christmas day passes by quickly, especially after all the presents have been opened and their mother has confessed to being pregnant. The girls bombard her with questions, even though the twins might fear loosing their position as the babies. But Louis manages to convince them they will always be their only twins.

Mark tries to ask him about Harry multiple times, but Louis evades him. Unsure of what they are, he won’t speak to his dad about it. His father announces his engagement to his girlfriend, and Louis suddenly has a burst of a feeling telling him that both his parents are starting their own families now. More than ever he feels like the separation between his mum and his dad is complete. 

He lies awake on top of his bed. The clock tells him it’s past eleven at night. He checks his phone. No text from Harry. A ton from Liam, congratulating him on getting his shit together with Harry. One from Eleanor telling him to use her gift, which he will receive on body day at the Deakin Christmas Party, with Harry. How the hell she found out about them is beyond him. 

At 1 in the morning, he gathers a warm jumper and his keys. His big toe gets stuck on something which must have slipped under the bed. He bends forward to grab it and hold the Polaroid against his face. It pictures himself white droplets over his closed eyes and his face in utter bliss. He slips it into his jacket, before creeping down the steps. He takes off in a run as soon as he’s out of the main door. There had been a bit of noise coming from the back-yard. He didn’t want to alert his mother to him being gone, so he decided to leave Bertie in their driveway. 

Arriving at the Styles’ house, most lights have already dimmed. He can see two shadows dancing together in the kitchen. He looks upto the window he knows belongs to Harry. The room which used to be his own is dark. Like he did when he lived there, he climbs the vine up to the second floor. He taps his fingers against the edge of the glass and jiggles the frame. Something vibrates against his bum. A little creek allows Louis to climb through the open window. _Works like a charm._ He steps in and almost falls backwards. Someone is softly snoring in the pillows which used to be his. Louis takes a deep breath, takes off his vans and tries to steal himself out of the room, which is currently occupied by none other than Harry’s father, Des. He thinks there might be a woman with him, but he hasn’t had a decent conversation with the man, so he can’t know about Des’ romantic relationships. 

He lets the door close with a tiny click, and takes a deep breath when he finds himself in the hallway. Gemma is talking to a male voice behind her closed bedroom door. He tip-toes to the end of the hall, where Harry’s bedroom awaits. Louis doesn’t bother knocking, just walks in. Harry is sitting in the middle of his bed, pink covers swallowing him. He’s staring down at his phone. He looks up with a surprised “oh” escaping him.

“Hey.” Louis says, gently places his vans next to the door. 

“I was just… well… actually I was waiting for your reply.” Harry says, a small blush forming around his nose. He wiggles the phone in the air to demonstrate.

“Sorry, I was busy running to ye.” Louis grins, grabs his phone out of his back pocket. _Yupp, there it is a sweet little message from Curly_. He walks over to lean across the bed to give Harry a peck to the lips. From this Harry’s cheeks grow redder in colour. 

“I was about to come to you.” Harry says, when Louis sits down next to him. He tugs the warm jacket off of his arms and smiles at the blushing boy. 

“My sisters are younger. Christmas is over fast.” Louis says, and digs inside his jacket to find the two Polaroids he wanted to find. “Got something for ye.” Louis hands over both the Polaroid of himself and the one of them both. 

“I like this one.” Harry says raising the picture of Louis kissing Harry’s cheek. The only light coming from the fairy lights wrapped around their heads. 

“Really Harold? I thought ye’d ‘ave more appreciation for the other one. I mean it’s the result of yer massive list of skill sets.” Louis says and pokes Harry’s dimples. He giggles and tries to push him away.

“We look happy here.” Harry says. 

“Very cheesy, Curly.” Louis says.

“Wha…do we… I.” Harry stumbles, when Louis pushes his pants off to settle down next to Harry. Louis leans against him to brush their lips against each other. “Kiss me, please.” Harry finally says. 

Louis leans in to kiss him properly. Harry leaned against him, large hands grabbing into his soft hips. He moans at the contact. Eyes closed, he slips his tongue against Harry’s. His hands move under the comforter to find Harry completely utterly naked. “Gorgeous.” Louis says between kisses. 

“Thanks.” Harry says with a blush creeping over his skin. 

“What are we watching?” Louis asks and slips under the bedsheets. 

“Love Actually.” Harry whispers, and pushes the laptop back to sit on his thighs.

“A romcom, who would’ve guessed.” Louis snickers. Harry tentatively scoops into his side, and Louis suddenly has a lot of curls in his mouth. Louis follows the film for a few moments, drawing images on Harry’s bicep with his index finger. Harry’s hot breath leaves a damp patch on his white shirt. 

“So,” Harry says after Sarah kisses Michael in the film. “What does your dad know?”

“Does it matter?” Louis evades the question. 

“He’s the one you call dad, so yeah it matters.” Harry says against his chest.

“Told him a while ago there was someone I was interested in. He called me coward. And too proud for me own good.” Louis says. He’s not too pleased with all of that. Harry stays quiet, Louis can feel his eyelashes brush against his shirt. “Was right before Ibiza… I was in a real bad place, love. I felt like I was bein’ ripped apart.” 

“I’m sorry.” Harry says.

“Shouldn’t be. I wasn’t mature about it. Freaked me out. Ye freaked me out, but ye’re all I know baby.” Harry sits up to stare at Louis, his chin digging into Louis’ breastbone. “Ye’re all I wanted in front of me. Like a habit, ye know. I can’t give ye up. Too much pressure.”

Harry blinks at him, his eyes glazing over, “I didn’t know you were going through all that.” 

Louis shrugs, “since me parents broke up, yeah? I always thought the only thing I have left is meself, ye messed with me pride.” He traces Harry’s jaw, the film forgotten. “It doesn’t matter now, does it? Now I got ye.” 

“But I like to know what you went through in that time.” Harry says. “We were both hurting Lou!” 

“Yeah, tha’ was shitty of me.” Louis says. Harry rubs Louis’ shirt up to give him a kiss right underneath his belly button. “Stop. I’m fat.”

“You’re not.” Harry says, but flattens the shirt again, “I’ll kill the person who told you so.” 

“Then ye’ll ‘ave to hack a whole bunch of people.” Louis snickers, “ye look like a Greek God, though. Can’t compete with tha’.” 

“I don’t… I have to many pimples. My bum is way too tiny and my arms look like fish sticks.” Louis laughed. 

“Tha’s the weirdest thing I ever heard ye say.” Louis says. 

“I’m so right though,” Harry sits up and wiggles his arms in the air like he were interpreting a bird. “Flopping like fish out of water.” 

“I think ye’re just sayin’ tha’ cause ye want me to feel better.” Louis chuckles, he grabs Harry by his hands and pushes him back on top of himself. Harry doesn’t reply to him. “Liam makes ye work out, and it shows, baby. Gorgeous muscles, babe. No wonder all the birds are pissed yer gay. God-damn stunner, ye are.” Harry blushes on top of him and cuts him off by pressing another kiss to his lips. 

“Can I give you a hickey?” Harry asks, a hand tracing the neck of his shirt. Louis only nods. Harry pushes the shirt down and sucks on the golden skin of his collarbone. Louis wiggles under him, the arousal shooting into his cock. Harry detaches and licks over the spot like a cat cleaning its fur. He smiles up at him. “Want everyone at your mum’s party to know you belong to someone. 

“I think I ‘ave to ware a turtleneck then.” Louis grins. Harry punches him in the tummy.

“Please don’t hide me away any more.” Harry says, true distress in his voice.

“No, no, never. Never again. I promise.” Louis says and hugs him tighter against himself. Louis falls asleep holding him as tight as possible. 

Louis rolls out of bed at the crack of dawn. The alarm is blaring, so he won’t be woken by Anne like Harry had been woken by Jay twenty-four-hours earlier. Harry’s quiet mumbling stops, and he looks over his shoulder, as Louis falls out of bed. “You’re leaving?” 

“Snuck out. If me dad finds me bed empty, he’s goin’ t’ go bunkers.” Louis says, pulling his shirt over his head. His hair stands in different angles off of his head and he fans his breath into his hand, _yuck_.

“Okay.” Harry’s deep raspy morning voice says. He looks at the small alarm clock to stare at the time. “It’s seven.” He says.

“Yes, Harold. And me sisters wake up at eight. Every God damn morning.” Louis says and shuffles through the dark room to reach Harry. He blinks up at the older boy with puffy green eyes. He rubs them and pouts like a baby. “I’ll see ye at me parent’s Christmas party, right?” 

“Yeah, I’ll be there.” Harry mumbles.

“Later, love.” Louis bends forward pecking Harry’s lips and ruffling through his messy tangles of hair.

“Bye.” Harry groans, face already pushed into the pillow again. 

Louis makes it home to find the twins already in the living room. Unlike other days they aren’t watching a film, but discussing their Christmas haul. Louis places his index finger over his lips, “ye didn’t see me.” 

“Tha’ll cost ye.” Daisy giggles. 

“Fine, whatever… No word t’ mum.” Louis says, before he drops the vans to the other shoes and rushes upstairs into the first shower.

He helps his sisters put away all the presents and clean the living room. Fizzy helps with cooking, while Louis is in charge of creating a bar in the kitchen. Dan almost breaks his back trying to install some mistletoes. Louis and Lottie drag a small red sled out into the backyard. By 9 the entire house is ready for their Boxing Day Christmas Party. 

The house starts to fill with his parents friends and some, selected few, colleagues. The Payne’s arrive with all four of their children, and Louis gets introduced to Liam’s sisters. Liam quickly snatches Louis away to inform him Zayn is on his way too, even though Jay had not invited any of the Malik’s. “As long as he stands clear of Harry, I’m alright with it.” Louis says, taking a swig from the whiskey he had laid out. 

“He won’t. He lost interest.” Liam says, when they reach Jade waiting for them in front of a small bookshelf. Liam hands over one of the beverages he was holding.

“Is that a hickey?” Jade asks, pressing a finger against the forming bruise. Louis thought it was pretty well hidden, though he did pop a button of his white dress shirt earlier. 

“Stop it.” Louis says, when Jade continuously pokes at it. He did promise Harry a turtle-neck. “I can go get a turtle-neck if it offends ye this much.” 

“Oh look at him,” Jade giggles. “Trying to appear all modest.” 

“I am modest.” Louis clarifies.

“Fucking hell you are.” Liam grunts. 

“He’s never been modest. It’s his entire charm.” Zayn says. He slings an arm around Liam’s neck and grins at Louis. “Merry Christmas, mate.” 

“Too ye to.” Louis says, even if the images of Zayn and Harry kissing still troubles his mind. “Who’s the lucky then?” He asks pointing to Louis neck.

“None of yer business, for none of ye. Get it?” He raises his finger and points at each of his friends. 

“Oh poppy cock,” Eleanor joins them, taking a swig from what ever was hidden in her black cup. “Got you this.” Eleanor holds up a package and places it in Louis’ hand.

“Didn’t you two break-up? Why are you so cordial? Just think of Perrie and Zayn here.” Jade said, pointing at Zayn with her glass. An unimpressed look in her face watches him. 

“Don’t start.” Liam warns, but it seems to be addressed to Zayn rather than Jade.

“I already bought it, so just take it.” Eleanor says.

Louis smiles up at her, “me birthday present was already grand.” She giggles and winks. Max joins them and presses another glass into her hands. She discards the black cup on one of the shelves behind her. Louis rolls his eyes before he rips apart the present, letting the Christmas tree decorated paper fall to his feet.

“What is that?” Harry asks over Louis’ shoulder. Louis shivers, the deep voice giving him a tiny shiver through his body. He turns around to give him a warm smile.

“Is that a vibrator?” Liam asks. A few people around them turn around, and Harry snickers into his hand. 

“Yeah, like promised a vibrator. They call it the bunny.” Louis stares at the vibrator, and right there on top of the shaft a rabbit is holding on. 

“Oh my God can I have it?” Harry asks.

“Are you for real?” Louis turns around to him. He looks beautiful. Like on his birthday, Harry has pulled his hair into a half bun and is wearing a red bow around it. His lips are a delicate shade of pink, which fits perfectly well with his blouse, _he’s wearing a women’s blouse,_ Louis realises _._ The blouse just barely falls over his bum, revealing a bulge in his pants.

“No I have my own.” Harry shrugs, and grins when Jade gurgles a laugh. 

“A little G-spot vibrator for the boys?” Eleanor asks, Max and Liam pull a shocked face just at the mere thought. Louis turns the bunny in his hand thoughtfully. Thoughts already on using it on Harry. He can feel himself twitch in his own pants. 

“Don’t mind if I do.” Harry says, and Louis feels wholly unprepared for this relationship. Harry has so much more experience in this, but then again at least he gained some experience during this summer. Louis looks up to catch Harry’s eye and winks. Harry blushes a bit.

“No turtle-neck?” He whispers into his ear, when the others start talking about something else. 

“Sorry, me mum didn’t go for it.” Louis says. “I want t’ try this with ye tonight.” 

Harry looks down, “maybe I’ll let you.” Louis grins at him. 

“I’ll get ye there.” Louis whispers.

“Want a smoke?” Zayn asks and wiggles his eyebrows, “from the banshee?” 

Louis nods, “let’s use the back porch.” He directs his friends to the back porch, where Zayn prepares a blunt.

“Not to make this awkward, but weren’t you meant to quit?” Jade asks, spreading venom with her voice. 

“Can we just enjoy this?” Liam asks. 

“Fuck off Jade.” Zayn says. “Mind your own business.” 

As the host, Louis takes the first hit before giving it over to Harry, who shakes his curls. Liam takes it from him, before Louis leans over to Harry. He grabs his neck and blows some smoke into his mouth. Harry gulps, Louis can watch his pupils grow darker, and he coughs. Louis chuckles into his hand. 

When he looks back up, Jade is taking a hit, her eyes frozen on Louis’ lips. She giggles to herself, once the high starts to spread through her. “You two… can’t believe it.” She mumbles. 

“What you on about now?” Zayn asks. 

“Nothing. Mind your own business, cunt.” Jade says. She stands up and opens the door. Warm air spreads to them, when she and Eleanor slip back inside. The other four, minus Harry, finish the blunt. Liam stands up to get some drinks and Zayn was about to follow him, when Louis grabs his arm. Harry is still sitting on the edge of the porch. 

“Don’t ever touch him again.” Louis says into his ear. Zayn’s eyes rush to Harry, who is absent-mindedly touching the bun on his head. 

“What are we talking about here?” Zayn asks, pretending like he doesn’t realise what is going on. 

“Harry. Never. Again.” Louis says. 

“I learn my lessons Louis. I get it. I won’t get near him again without telling you.” Zayn says. Louis can’t tell if he’s being earnest or if he’s pulling Louis’ leg.

“If ye don’t I’ll destroy you.” Louis warns him.

“Louis,” Zayn scoffs. “You just gave me the very information which would destroy you! Don’t threaten me, and I’ll stay out of your way.” 

“Stop fighting.” Harry says. He stands up to stare at them both. 

“We’re not, are we Louis?” 

“Don’t snub me.” Louis steps closer to Zayn. 

“I said stop. Pleas, Lou.” Harry says, grabbing Louis waist to pull him away from Zayn. Meanwhile, he gives Zayn a pleading look.

“Fucking hate couples.” Zayn groans and closes the porch door behind him. 

“Shouldn't ‘ave done tha’.” Louis says. “He ought t’ kna not t’ mess with ye.” 

“Louis, he wants to be your friend again, of course he isn’t going to touch me. Besides, he has someone else.” Harry says.

“He does?” 

“Yes. You even know them. Surprised you haven’t figured it out by now.” Harry says, leaning back against the large window. 

“Who?” Louis asks stepping closer to Harry. 

“I … can’t. I made a promise.” Harry says.

“T’ who? Zayn? Come on, love. Ye can tell me anything from Zayn.” Louis says, leaning into the taller boy he has to look up at him. 

“It wasn’t to Z.” Harry looks up. Louis follows his line of sight to a mistletoe. “Now kiss me you fool.” Louis chuckles and goes on his tiptoes to press their lips together. Louis’ hands find Harry’s bulge and gives his cock a squeeze. Harry jumps. 

“Ye taste so good.” Louis chuckles, and goes back on his tip toes to give him another kiss. There is a knock on the glass. Louis’ heart stutters when he meets blue eyes. “Shit. Who is that?” Harry looks over his own shoulder before turning dark deep colour of red. 

“That’s Charlie… Gem’s new boyfriend.” Harry says. Louis stares at the guy, he has blonde shoulder-length dirty hair with cherub lips and a strong beard.

“Really? How long ‘ave they been dating? A month?” Louis asks. Gemma has been out of the house for about three months, _how in the hell did she find a boyfriend this quick_?

“Don’t be mean. They are sweet together. His dad just died, and his mum remarried with two step-siblings.” Harry says. Charlie has turned around again and is walking back into the room. Now it is painfully clear to Louis how much they could have been seen by the party inside. 

“Come on, this way.” He grabs Harry’s hand and pulls the sound boy into the garden. “New boyfriend aye? Looks like both siblings ‘ave a grand year comin’ up.” Louis mumbles and stops in front of the red sled. “Hop in young Harold.” 

“The sled? Really Louis?” Harry asks, but he looks to bemused to refuse him. He hops inside and Louis sits down with him on the ground. If they lie back against the cushions of the seat, they won’t be seen from the people inside. Though, it is cold out here. Louis shivers slightly.

“I’d offer you my jacket, but I seem to have misplaced it.” Harry giggles. 

“Then let’s warm us up with warm thoughts.” Louis says and wiggles his eyebrows. He grins the back of Harry’s neck and bruises their lips together. He can feel a tongue in his mouth. Hot warmth spreads through him, and he grabs Harry’s hips to hoist him towards himself. Harry followed his lead. Mouths moving together in synch and their breaths mingled. It feels warm in his gut, the pit of his stomach swirling in a million directions. 

Louis’ fingertips rub over the bottom of Harry’s neck. He can feel his goosebumps, and it jitters in his groin. He pushes himself forward, so they can align their crotches together better. The sled creeks under them. Harry starts to giggle, and they separate, “sorry. It’s just the sled. I think it might be falling apart.” Harry’s nose scrunches up and his lips pull into a delighted smile. His eyes squinted together, Louis hasn’t seen him this happy since they met in the concert.

“Yeah,” Louis says. “It’s quite old, I believe. For all ye kna me grandparents might ‘ave focked inside this thing.” Louis grins and finds Harry right nipple to flick it. Harry giggles some more. 

“Oh that’s awful, Lou.” He says. 

“Hey,” Louis grins. “This time the stars won’t travel for us to see it together.” Harry looks up at the sky. 

“On the contrary, they have to fight harder. It’s about to rain, we can’t see shit.” Harry says solemn staring up at the sky.

“Spoil sport.” Louis mumbles and grabs Harry’s curls to pull on them. Harry moans involuntarily. Harry’s cheeks heat up. “Now shut it, so I can kiss ye for all the stars to see.” He swings his leg around Harry’s crotch and sits on his lap. He pulls on Harry’s hair again to kiss him. He doesn’t care he can be seen again from the porch. He presses his bum down hard against Harry’s crotch. 

“Oh, Lou.” Harry whines into his skin. Louis rides his clothed crotch and the sled creeks and creeks along with him. Harry is busy distracting himself from his pending orgasm by sucking another bruise into Louis’ skin to form a necklace around his collarbone. 

“Louis William Tomlinson! Get out of that sled right now! Ye will die of hypothermia.” Jay’s voice echoes through the small garden. 

“Same goes to you Harry Edward Styles. Back inside with you!” Anne’s voice calls to them. The two mothers mumble something to each other which remains incoherent to Louis and Harry. They zap up from the sudden shock of their mothers. The sled loses its balance and suddenly the thing tips over. 

Anne and Jay watch their sons tumble out of the red sled, which toppled over. Both almost have hard attacks watching their only sons get squished by a sled. “We’re alright.” Louis calls to them. “We’ll be with ye in a moment.” 

“You have three minutes.” Anne calls. Louis wiggles his way out of the overturned sled, and helps Harry do the same. His little bun is pushed to the side, and he looks lopsided by now. 

“Love yer little bow, love.” Louis complements Harry.

“Thanks.” Harry says, out of instinct he grabs for it. His face crumbles in shock, it is not in the place it is supposed to be in. 

“Don’t worry about it. Looks lovely.” Louis says. Harry still opens the bun to rearrange his hair into another one. Louis watches him silently, rubbing his arms over his freezing arms. “Our mums will kill us.” 

“Yeah, let’s go back in.” Harry says, he jogs back to the porch. Louis watches him jump and bites his lips. He really needs to get a better view of that. Harry turns around to him, beaming. The porch light bathes him in a golden glow. “I’ll ask my mum if I can stay over.” He says before pressing a last kiss to Louis lips. 

“I’d like that.” Louis says. 

Harry helps them gather the worst of the rubbish in large blue plastic bags. He is chatting with Lottie, who is giving Louis weird looks over her shoulder. “I’m letting him stay.” Jay says.

“Thank ye, mummy.” Louis says and bends over the kitchen aisle to plant a kiss to her cheeks. 

“I trust ye two are… what are ye? Anne was hoping you would be boyfriends.” Jay whispers. 

“We’re not. Not yet.” Louis says. “I’m working on it.” Jay looks caught between awe and surprise. 

“So it is him then? Ye want to be with Harry?” Jay asks.

“Can we do this on another day?” Louis asks. “I’m knackered.” 

“Fine. But no funny business. And ye do not lock yer door!” She orders. Louis dutifully nods.

When Louis returns from the bathroom, ready for bed. Harry is waiting for him at the edge of his bed. “Hi.” He says, nervously. He’s turning the bunny dildo in his hand. “Found this downstairs with Lottie. I didn’t know you told your family.” 

“They saw me ‘ave a break down.” Louis says.

“Break down?” Harry asks, confusion in his dark green eyes.

“Yeah. After I saw ye with Nick.” Louis says. He walks up to Harry and spreads his thighs with his knees. 

“But you told them.”

“Yes I did. Now love. How about we find a way to use tha’ thing on ye.” Louis says, pointing to the bunny. 

Louis rubs his lips over Harry’s, “Yeah okay.” Harry says. Louis leans back, Harry following after his lips.

“I earned it then?” He teases Harry’s earlier words.

“Yes, oh yes, you did.” Louis grabs the dildo. Harry’s eyes get stuck on the purple thing. 

“What do you want to do with that?” Harry asks with a cocked brow. 

“I want it inside of ye.” Louis bluntly says. Harry nods, squirming backwards until his head hits the pink pillow. Louis undresses, watching Harry with hungry eyes. The younger boy lifts his hips, so Louis can help him peel off his black suit-pants. He takes his socks with them too. Harry’s eyes are already impossibly dilated, and his teeth are biting his lips. 

Louis kneels between Harry’s thighs, “so… um… have ye done this before?” 

“What? Take a dildo?” Harry asks, looking at Louis bemusedly. 

“Um… the whole thing.” Louis says.

“I’ve fingered myself before, yes. But never by someone else and never a dildo.” Harry says, and Louis suddenly envies his confidence. 

“Good. Makes me ragin’ mad knawing someone touches ye but me.” Louis says, his fists clenching together.

Louis leans over and retrieves lube from his bedside table. He repositions himself back between Harry’s thighs. He drops a large gulp of lube on his hand. He gives Harry’s 8-inch cock a few quick tugs. He lets go of him to lean over him. His lubed hand placing his hand on his chest to give him a kiss to the jaw, right under his ear is where Harry goes crazy.

“Ah.” Harry mewls and rushes his hips upward. Louis chuckles lightly against his skin, before he drags a finger past his pubic hair and slips his hand over the area where the thigh meets the bum. He gently messages Harry there, trying to give himself the encouragement to go down there. A place he has never been to before. He runs a hand over the bottom of his cheek. His finger presses against Harry’s ring. “Lou-ehh…” Harry says, his heart nervously punching in his chest. Louis watches Harry’s face, drunk on seeing Harry get off. The way his eyes flutter, the way he scrunches his nose in pleasure and the way his lips part obscenely. 

“Yer better than any porn could do me.” Louis says, Harry moans and then giggles. Louis’ cock lies hard against Harry’s thigh. Pleasure shoots through him.

“Not the complement I was going for.” Harry says. Louis’ eyes go into slits, and he revenges himself by slowly, very slowly apply pressure to the ring of muscle. Harry moans again, and Louis’ finger breaches the rim. He slowly starts an in and out motion. 

“Hey… ye still with me?” Louis asks. 

“Yeah,” Harry’s eyes roll in pleasure. “Feel so good.” 

Louis kisses his jawline, “how about ye fuck yerself on me finger, aye?” Louis grins when Harry tries to lift himself up and down on his one finger. “So hot, babe.” Louis praises him. Harry’s face falls into Louis’ neck, and he sucks down on his neck. Louis wiggles his finger inside him, tying to stretch the muscle a bit. 

Harry stops fucking himself, and Louis takes over again. He lubes up his second finger and enters Harry with his middle finger. When he is knuckled deep, he touches something inside of him. Harry buck off of the pink sheets. “Fuuu-ck.” Harry screams, his lips brush Louis cheek. 

“Alright there?” 

“Prostate.” Harry says, bucking up again to get Louis to keep assaulting the sweet bundle of nerves situated inside him. “I’m so close, boo. Please let me come.” 

“Ye want to come for me baby?” Louis asks, speeding up. “Be a good boy. Mark yerself.” 

“More, Lou, more.” Harry whines, his thighs quiver and Louis can feel his muscle twitch beneath him. 

“Sh…baby, show me how good ye can come for me.” Louis whispers into Harry’s ear. The dildo completely forgotten on the night-stand. A deep grumble rips through Harry, and his cock twitches in the air when white streaks of come land all over his stomach. Louis’ fingers slip out of him again. “So pretty.” Louis says against Harry’s lips before he takes his fill of kissing him. He gets back up to head for the bathroom. The lights under his sister’s doors have since gone dark, and he hurries to the bathroom. 

He quickly cleans Harry, when he suddenly sits up and takes Louis’ cock into his mouth with one go. “Bloody hell, Hazzah.” Harry sucks him deep, no gag reflex imminent. Louis’ forehead rests against the wall above his bed. “Slow down, or I’ll come down yer throat.” Harry doesn’t relent, using his free hand to juggle Louis balls. “I’m goin’ t’…” Louis comes down Harry’s throat, moaning loudly and beating a hand against the slope of the roof. Harry releases him and coughs once. “Alright?” 

“Yeah… ‘course.” Harry says and rubs the back of his hand over his chin. The come rubs off, and Harry sucks it off of the back of his hand.

“Argh…” Louis complains, the image to arousing, he falls on his side next to Harry. He’s looking up at him grinning. 

“Sorry about the sheets.” Harry says, lifting them, so they slip below it. 

“So it was a good Christmas then?” Louis whispers against Harry’s lips. 

“Yeah.” Harry says, leaning over to shut the lights off. “Got a boyfriend off the boot.” 

“Boyfriend?” Louis chuckles, “last night ye wanted me to wine and dine ye.” 

“I considered it, but then again you just saw the filthiest part of me.” Harry giggles. “Unless you don’t want me to be,” he nervously backtracks.

“Ye fucking with me?” Louis’ reached out to touch Harry’s swollen lips with his fingertips. “Yer the most perfect being, ye know?” 

“I think you lost the plot.” Harry mumbles.

“Nah.” Louis scoots closer, “ye’re perfect. And I’d be the lucky one t’ call ye me boyfriend.” Louis’ stomach tightens in anguish. _Boyfriend_ , words never uttered before. A small paranoid part of him feels uneasy saying it, the other louder part is jumping somersaults. Their lips connect in an open-mouthed kiss.

Louis scoffs when it really starts raining outside. For the first time living in Cheshire Louis feels content and happy. He closes his eyes and let’s Harry’s sweet words of baby blue dresses lull him into sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!! If you liked, and haven't come around to it yet, please click the kudos. If you want to spread some more love please leave a comment.
> 
> Some explanatory notes:  
> 1\. My Christmas looks very different from British and American Christmas celebrations, so please forgive me any inaccuracies. I tried researching it a bit, but every family has their own traditions :)  
> 2\. For Louis' birthday this year fans started the 'lightsforlouis' movement and this is my slightly adapted contribution to it.


	10. My Beautiful Boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New Year, New Chapter  
> it took me a little long to get this out... it was hard getting a free moment without at least one of my family members looking over my shoulder 🙄 Hope you enjoy 🧡
> 
> (Trigger Warning: a hell lot of smut, body worshipping (I guess), mention of cross-dressing, defiantly experimenting, a dose of angst and some mentions of drugs and alcohol)

“I think it is time for a talk Louis!” 

“Oh bloody hell. What about?” Louis asks. He mutes the film he was watching and stares at his mother who takes a deep breath. She sits down on the small coffee table in front of Louis, hogging a few small items against her growing baby bump. 

“We are going to have The Talk.” His mother says. Louis can feel his face heat up. Nerves shoot through him to his fingertips.

“Mum… we really don’t… I think… like… we already had the talk, mum. No need to repeat it.” Louis staggers through the sentence. 

“Yes. Well, my love, we never had The Talk when you started dating boys.” She clears her throat and hands a paper to Louis. He looks down at it and reads the header ‘The Homosexual Act: how to be responsible and safe’. 

“Oh God, mum!” Louis says, and wishes he could run off and hide. But his mother is already staring him down hard, it has a better effect on him then actually tying him down to the sofa. He feels his ears heat up. 

“I want ye to read all that very carefully. If ye want we could read it together, if that makes it easier for you.” 

“Oh no, mum. Please! Ye’re makin’ it worse.” Louis complains, afraid to raise his eyes to meet hers. His face feels even hotter than before.

“Alright, well do it in yer own time then.” She says, managing to sound almost unfazed. “This is for you too. The woman in the shop said ye’ll need this.” Louis looks up to stare at his mother’s hands. She is giving him a full pack of condoms and lube. Louis isn’t sure if it is possible for him to turn even redder.

“Can I go now?” Louis asks, his face is burning incredibly.

“Yes, love. But do read that!” She points to the flyer. “Remember, you’re the older one between you and Harry, you have responsibility. Personally,” his mother adds. Louis is squirming, dying to get off this spot. “Anne and I are delighted to finally be family. I don’t want to be the reason her child has to go to the doctors because of an STD.” 

“Yes, mum. Thanks. I’m going now.” Louis says. _I don’t want Anne mad at me either_! Fear strikes through him, he can’t screw up with Harry. _Or Gemma And Anne will be after me with death wishes._ Louis shivers, but jumps up to flee.

“Yes, alright. Go and read.” She says pointedly. “Your big brother is going to be having sex responsibly.” She rubs her tummy. And Louis feels himself stare at her, _how can she even say that to a foetus?_

“Freezing out there.” Fizzy complains, just as she steps into the house. She slips out of her Uggs.

“Johanna, it’s snowing, finally. The twins are still outside.” Mark says, stepping into the kitchen. He looks at Louis, who is blushing from head to toe, eyes large in shock. Mark’s eyes look down at the boys arms. He spies condoms and blushes in turn. Fizzy peeps over his shoulder. As quickly as possible, Louis tries to squeeze past the duo. 

Fizzy is faster, her hand quickly snatches his pack of condoms, “what do we have here?” 

“Give it back, Fizz!” Louis screams. It’s high and punctured, embarrassing him further. 

“What mum got ye these?” Fizzy giggles and wiggles the pack in the air. 

“Felicite give it back to him.” Mark says, although a bit uneasy.

“Give it back, you bitch!” Louis screams, he lets the lube and paper fall to the floor and launches himself at his younger sister.

“You’re allowed to have sex now?” Fizzy taunts him. She jumps to the left, escaping Louis grasp. Louis doesn’t give up. He chases her around the kitchen aisle, around Mark and finally makes her drop to the floor by hurling his entire body at her in the living room. He can hear his mother squeal. 

“Stop it you two!” Jay says.

“Ye’re never goin’ t’ be allowed to ‘ave sex!” Louis says, his right knee is poking into her stomach. He starts jabbing his fingers into her sides. “I’ll make sure of it! All boys ye meet will never touch ye.” 

“Don’t say it like that.” Fizzy giggles. “I’ll tell Harry all yer dirty secrets.” 

“Harry?” Mark says. He looks to Jay, who is cradling her tummy, distress on her face. “The boy from Christmas morning?” 

“What?” Jay says, she looks at him. Her face clearly saying she doesn’t have time for this. “Mark make them stop!” 

“Give it back or all boys in school won’t touch ye with a pole stick!” Louis says and ramps his flat hand against his chest. 

“Alright, alright!” Fizzy says, and holds out the condoms. Louis quickly snatches them and gets up to run away. “Ye’re empty threats don’t scare me!” Fizzy screams, while Louis gathers the lube up from the floor. Mark watches him, speechless. “I only took pity on ye.” Fizzy screams, while Louis is already up the stairs. 

He flunks himself on top of his bed and screams into his pillow. “I hate me sisters.” Louis whispers. “Next one better be a boy.” The phone vibrators somewhere on the floor where he hastily left it earlier. He staggers over.

Curly  💚💛

Do ye fancy a date tmrw?

YES! 

Wine and dine?

Louis chuckles to himself when he sees Harry’s reaction. He shakes his head fondly.

💚🍑💙

The comb scratches through his fringe, and he flips it to the side in a swift move. “Ye look fancy.” Mark says. Louis looks over to see Mark leaning against the door-frame.

“Yea, tha’s me. Wicked innit?” Louis asks, twirling. He blames it on Harry’s influence. He would never have twirled if he hadn’t met Harry. At least he looks good. He’s wearing blue jeans that hog his bum with a nice large maroon Christmas jumper. 

“Wicked.” Mark echoes. “So… ye’re goin’ out?” 

“Yes.” Louis says. He gives up on his fringe, and throws the comb back into a drawer filled to the top with nail polish.

“With Harry? Is it?” Mark asks. 

“Eh… yeah.” Louis says.

“Great. ‘ave fun.” Mark says. To Louis, it feels like Mark wants to say more, but he’s never been the talkative type. 

“Cheers.” Louis says, before he’s down the stairs. “Oi, Dan!” Dan turns around from where he was halting a chat with Lottie. “I need yer car.”

“What’s wrong with yours?” Dan asks. Lottie starts chewing on a candy cane.

“Goin’ on a date and I want t’ show off with yer vintage.” Louis says. He’s already picked out the keys and is dangling them on his index finger.

“A date, huh? It’s a cabriolet car, it’s going to be freezing Louis.” Dan says. Louis can hear Mark coming down the stairs behind him. 

“I’ll put the hood up, if it starts snowing again!” Louis says. “Come on, please! I’ll owe ye.” 

“It better come back in one piece, boy!” Dan says, and Louis is already out of the door.

Louis honks the car outside the Styles’ home. The door opens to reveal Anne, who gives Harry a kiss to the cheek. Harry blushes and uncurls himself out of her embrace to walk over to Louis’ car. He’s wearing his tight black pants, a black loose shirt with a knee-length black coat. His hair is tangling like a prince against his collarbone and a large maroon scarf hanging around his neck. “A cabriolet?” He asks, raspy and deep as ever. 

Louis steps out of the car, rounds it and opens the door for Harry. “Yes, rap tha’ scarf tight, baby.” Louis giggles and watches Harry’s sparkling Chelsea boots step into the car. He runs around the car again and steps into the blue cabriolet old-timer. 

“Where’d you get your hands on this?” Harry asks as soon as the engine roars.

“Dan has one in the garage. We ‘ave to bring it back in one piece.” Louis says with a wink over the console. The harsh end-of-year wind blows through their hair. And Louis can see Harry wrapping the scarf ones over his curly head. But he’s smiling. 

Louis stops the car outside the ice-skating rink in the middle of town. He places a hand on Harry’s arm, “wait.” Harry’s hand freezes over the door-opening-handle and lets it slide down on his leg again. Louis runs around the car and holds out his hand, Harry lets his larger one slip into Louis’ hand. He blushes a bit around the nose, when Louis helps him out of the low car. 

“Thanks.” Harry says and unfolds the scarf, so it hangs in two long lines down his torso. Louis licks his lips when he gets to see the cross-necklace dangling between his open shirt. “Don’t you think we should close the hood?” Louis looks from Harry’s impossibly green eyes back to the car. “In case it snows.” Harry says, blinking a couple of times. Louis really wants to kiss him right now. The feeling is overwhelming, looking into his beautiful eyes, being allowed to look into his soul. 

“Yeah, yeah… deffo.” Louis says and runs around again to sit down in the driver's seat. A few buttons later, the hood of the car is descending on him again. He can see Harry biting at his lips while Louis disappears from view. 

“Lou?” Harry asks quietly.

“Wha’? Ye thought I’d drive away again?” Louis chuckles, but when he sees Harry’s solemn face his smile falls off of his face. “I’d never do tha’, babe.” He walks over and gives Harry’s hand a gentle squeeze before walking towards the rental. They both pick their skates.

Sooner than later, Louis finds himself sitting on a small bench, Harry kneeling in front of him to tie his skates. “Ye knaw I am able t’ do this by meself.” Louis snickers. Harry just shrugs.

“I know. Just like being nice is all.” Harry says, but Louis can see his ears heat up.

“Can’t really complain. I like the view from here.” Louis grins, when Harry looks up at him, rabbit teeth biting harshly into his soft pink lips.

“Alright, stallion. Let’s just go on the ice. Show me what you can do.” Harry says and straightens. He wobbles a bit on the skates, and Louis stifles a laugh.

“Still a baby giraffe, ye are.” Louis chuckles and follows Harry to the entrance of the rink. Harry steps on the ice and his arms sway in the air to steady himself.

“Still endeared?” Harry asks him, while his hand reaches out to help Louis on to the ice. 

“Very much so.” Louis grins at him. A few staggering slithering strides over the rink and soon enough the couple is swaying over the ice in a nice and steady rhythm. “Ye’re quite good at this, Harold.” Louis contemplates as he watches him. 

“Right?” Harry asks with eyes closed in a laugh. Louis smiles watching his happy face. “Look, look, what I can do…” Harry says and strides faster, just to stop in the middle and makes a small twirl in the middle. It’s very staggered, more squared than a proper circle twirl. Nonetheless, Louis applauds.

“Gorgeous Harold. A real princess.” Louis says. Harry clutches his stomach and keeling over to laugh. His eyes crinkle and his nose scrunches up. Louis skates over to him and giggles too when he sees Harry face to face. His eyes flitter down to look at the heart-like bow of the top of his lip. They keep skating around the rink, and Louis can’t stop watching Harry. Harry twirling. Harry laughing. Harry wobbling. Harry’s curls. Harry, Harry, Harry. He’s so enthralled by the goofy beautiful man in front of him. He doesn’t see anyone else but the curly haired boy. 

“Let me try this.” Harry says, starts skating and lifts one leg, stretching out his arms like a bird. 

“Oh come on, as slow as ye, everyone can do it.” Louis says and hurries off. His skates slip over the cold ice. His feet wobble and he feels them give out under him. An unmanly squeal and Louis lands on his bum, skating over the ice on his arse. 

“Lou!” Louis can hear Harry say, and clumsily come to a stop next to him. He falls to his knees and brushes Louis’ cheek. “Is you’re glorious bum okay?” Harry asks, without blushing.

Louis laughs, “glorious bum, Harold?” 

“Between the two of us, I think you know just as well as me that your bum runs the show.” Harry says, and hugs Louis’ waist to try and help him hoist himself up.

“A picture for the two of you?” A bald man asks. He is standing above them, holding a small Polaroid camera. His jacket has a few holes in them, and the right shoe is missing a small patch of leather. 

“Yes, please.” Harry says, who must have seen the state of the man’s clothes too. 

“Smile,” the man says ,and Louis can feel Harry lean into him. The man hands over the Polaroid. “Five pounds please.” He says, holding out his hand. 

Harry rummages through his coat and finds a few notes, shoving them into his hand. The man wants to protest, but Harry shakes his head. “Please keep it. I work in Mandeville Bakery on Sundays if you ever need a hot coffee or something to eat.” The man blushes and hurries away quickly.

Harry tries helping Louis up, which ends up in them falling on each other again. Louis laughs, and Harry presses a wet kiss against Louis’ cheek. Louis goes rigid underneath the taller boy. “Oh shit, sorry. I’m sorry… Louis… sorry.” Harry says, and Louis rolls out from under him.

“s’ fine.” Louis says. Brushing his hands over his knees, he watches while Harry tries to get to his feet. His eyes are downcast, and he slips falling on his wrist. “Ye alright?” Louis bends down and grabs his ribcage, hoisting him up like he would with Daisy or Phoebe.

“Thanks.” Harry says, eyes still unfocused. Louis delicate rubs over his wrists, hoping he’s fine.

“Hey Harry?” Louis says.

“Yeah?” Harry asks, voice wobbly.

“Me bum’s alright, but do ye mind givin’ me yer jacket?” Louis asks.

“Your freezing already?” Harry asks, his eyes finally find Louis’. There’s a faint tug on his lips. 

“Kind of.” Louis wiggles his bum in Harry’s direction. His pants have split. Harry giggles and unwraps himself from the coat. 

“That’s a pretty big rip.” Harry says and helps Louis into the coat. “Sorry about the… you know…” 

“Haz, it’s fine.” Louis says, feeling the warm coat cover his bum. “Don’t worry about it.” 

“But it was so stupid of me… I know you don’t want… I’m just sorry.” Harry says, fiddling with his scarf. 

“Harry, it happened, no one saw. It’s fine. Besides, it’s our second real date, yeah? Let’s not overshadow it by a mistake.” Louis says kindly. 

Harry’s eyes light up, “okay.” 

“Havin’ said tha’, let’s make a run for it.” Louis says.

Harry looks confused, “we’ve only been here for an hour.” Harry pouts, _he actually pouts._ _How do his parents ever say no to him?_ Louis nods over Harry’s shoulder. Harry turns around and sees Danielle, Taylor and Barbara skating over in a small huddle. Harry looks back at Louis and shrugs.

“So what? Zayn and Liam are over there too.” Harry says and points to the other side of the rink. Louis looks over. Zayn is leaning against the small bar outside the rink, and Liam is saying something to him over the barrier.

“Since when do they hang out so much?” Louis asks, facing Harry. He’s getting into Louis’ bomber jacket, which looks ridiculous. It’s too short, stopping just at his waist, exposing the small patches of baby fat. The arms stops short just at the wrists, where Louis can clearly see his tattoo.

Harry rolls his eyes, “really Louis? I told you a month ago to talk to Liam about it.” He sips up the jacket with ease. 

“What am I supposed to ask?” Louis wonders. “It’s ridiculous… hey Liam are ye friends with Zayn again?” Louis imitates a fake conversation, rolling his eyes.

“Great started, darling.” Harry giggles. 

“Oh My God, is this like Wonderland or what?” Taylor asks, when she comes to a stop in the middle of the two.

“What? Taylor, what are you doing here?” Louis asks. He immediately reaches out to grab Harry’s upper arm making him twirl around him and into his own side.

“Oh God we found it you guys.” Taylor says again. Barbara giggles into her pink muffs. 

“Taylor, we are doin’ our own thing right now.” Louis tries to tell him he wants to be alone with Harry. Danielle waves at him awkwardly, Louis decides to ignore her.

“It was your birthday right? Are you feeling 22?” Taylor asks, not getting Louis’ plea to be left alone. 

“I’m not 22?!” Louis argues.

“Really?” Taylor says, looking into the sky. “Should be 22.” 

“Why?” Harry asks curiously. 

Louis rolls his eyes, “why does it matter?” Harry just scrunches his nose. 

“Just sounds so nice… twenty-two… twenty-twenty-twenty-two.” Taylor sings, and Barbara giggles some more. Annoyance fills Louis up. _What the fuck did these idiots take?_

“Alright, well… we got better things to do.” Louis says. And tries to skate away, grabbing a hold of Harry’s scarf. “Harry, come…” Harry turns around to him still talking to Barbara. “Harry…!” Harry awkwardly waves at the three of them, before he joins Louis. 

They skate to the side of the rink. “You annoyed?” Harry asks. He’s fumbling with the wrist of Louis’ jacket, like he’s trying to make it longer.

“No.” Louis says, short. “Can’t be mad when I’m with ye.” Harry looks up and beams. 

“Hey you guys…” Liam says, and he comes to a sharp stop next to him. A small puddle of scraped ice rains down on Louis’ skates.

“Didn’t see ye come in.” Louis says.

“That’s because we were here before you came in.” Zayn says and blows a steaming cup.

“Ye get a cuppa?” Louis asks.

“With a shot, yeah.” Liam says. He automatically hands it over to Louis. Louis takes a sniff,. It’s not a cuppa. It’s hot chocolate with a shot. 

“Can’t ‘ave t’ drive after this.” Louis says, passing it back to Liam.

“Since when do you care about drinking and driving?” Zayn asks. Harry’s eyebrows furrows from trying to make the connection.

“Since I got a precious cargo.” Louis says. Zayn raises an unimpressed eyebrow at him and looks at Harry too. Harry hides his face in Louis’ shoulder. “I meant the car, ye idiot.” Louis tries to deflect, but he rubs his hand over Harry’s back, hidden from view to the other boys. 

“Right, course you did.” Zayn scoffs.

“So are ye two on a date something, or why didn’t ye invite us?” Louis taunts Zayn or tries to.

“Could say the same to you too.” Zany says.

“Stop fighting.” Harry pleads. 

“Yeah, let’s just go separate ways.” Liam says, grabbing Zayn’s upper arm.

“No!” Harry says, stomping his foot. He must have not realised he was still on skates, because he slips a little and Louis has to keep him standing. Louis bores a heated hate glare into Zayn’s hand, which is trying to support Harry from the other side. Harry sees it too, “this isn’t cute Louis.” Harry warns him. “We can’t keep avoiding each other. We’re all friends for fuck’s sake.”

“Think that’s the first time I heard you swear.” Zayn grins.

Harry does not think it’s cute. “Figure it out.” He says, “now take a small video of me twirling on the fucking ice.” Harry says, ramming his phone into Louis hand. Louis raises the phone and tries to hide the fondness off of his face. 

“Louis,” Zayn says, standing close to Louis and passing an index finger over the rim of his cuppa. “I… well, I feel like I said this before, but I am sorry for everything. And I’d love it if we could put this shit all behind us. We… well, we could all spend New Years together, right?” Harry skates back to them and grins down at his phone, replaying the video a couple of times. “Ask Niall, too.” Zayn says, nodding to Harry. “Make it a friend thing about it.” 

“Oh yes please, Lou.” Harry says, his eyes shine bright in a lemon green. Louis can’t help but grin from the immediate happiness in his eyes. 

“Sure.” Louis says. “Let’s head out. Bye guys. I’ll call ye, Liam, for more info on New Years.” He and Harry skate to the barrier where they can stumble back on solid ground. 

“I’m so excited.” Harry says, all giddy and cute. Louis gives him a side eye. “I get to spend New Years with you!”

“Yeah, that’ll be great.” Louis says.

“Oh come on. He apologised. Be a man, accept it.” Harry grins while he sits down on one of the benches to untie his skates.

“He don’t even understand what he's apologising for mate.” Louis says, sitting down next to Harry, feeling the coat rub against his bare bum. 

“Don’t call me mate!” Harry says snappy. “He’s trying. And he is a very close friend to Liam, so suck it up. Grow some balls and take care of your business.” Harry is back in his Chelsea boots and walks off. Louis’ mouth is agape as he watches Harry’s bum walk off. _So much sass, kind of a turn on._ Louis shivers from the arousal burning under his veins.

Louis walks over to the rental and places his skates on the table. “Thank you.” The woman behind the counter smiles.

“Welcome.” Louis smiles, before he finds Harry leaning against a telephone box. His legs stretch out under him in long smooth black. Louis’ bomber jacket looks to small on him, but makes him look so fashionable Louis almost cringes. If they weren’t already dating, Louis doesn’t think he would have the balls to talk to him. “Hey.” He says, slowly raising a cigarette to his lips. Harry unhooks his arms from around his torso. “I’ll grow some balls, promise.” Louis grins up at the prince in front of him. “But only because it is ye askin’!” He lights the cigarette.

“So stubborn.” Harry mumbles, fanning his right hand in front of him to wiggle away the smoke.

“Says the stubborn one.” Louis grins. Harry smiles. “Stop being mad at me.”

“I’m not.” Harry says. “I need to pee, though.” 

“Okay.” Louis flips the cigarette, so the ash falls off the tip. “I’ll wait at the car.” Harry nods, while he disappears. Louis walks over to the old-timer and sucks on the cigarette. He wanted to give Harry a memorable romantic date, and he fears his little spat with the rest of their friends has overshadowed the experience. He rubs his eyebrows, trying to decrease the farrow in them.

“Nice car, Tommo.” Louis looks up to face Calum and Ashton walking up to him. 

“Oi, Oi, boys.” Louis calls, and subconsciously turns around to see if Harry is anywhere to be seen. If they find out he is here with Harry, he is done for. 

“Is this an Austin-Healey?” Ashton asks, whistling though his teeth. 

Louis bites down on the tip of his tongue when he sees Ashton rubbing his hand over the hood of the car. “Yeah, year 1967.” 

“Nice. How come you get to drive such a car?” Ashton asks.

“How come ye knaw so much about it?” Louis asks.

“My mother’s new husband is really into cars, and I used to work at his shop for summer.” Ashton shrugs to meet Louis’ eyes. 

“Right. It’s my step-fathers.” Louis says. “Do me a favour and stop touching it.” Louis says, and Ashton scoffs. Louis can see Harry walking out of the men’s room, but he quickly hides behind a truck, seeing Ashton talking to Louis.

“What you doing all by yourself?” Calum asks.

“I’m not. I’m here with Malik.” Louis says, trying to keep this conversation short.

“Ah, finally.” Ashton says, throwing his hands in the air. “So he stopped hanging with that fool Payne?” Before Louis can answer him, he continues, “it’s bloody annoying having him around. Harder to get my stuff you know?” 

“No, I don’t know. What are ye talkin’ about?” Louis asks. Ashton takes a small plastic bag out of his pocket and wiggles it in front of Louis’ face. Four yellow pills are trapped within it. “He’s dealing?” Louis can feel his veins freeze over. He just promised Harry to give Zayn another shot, how can he when Zayn is dealing?

“Sort of.” Ashton explains, “just for friends.” 

“Right.” Louis says. He exhales, glad that Zayn is sharing his supply with friends and not dealing dangerously. Louis stomps on the cigarette he dropped on the pavement.

“Hey, Ash,” Calum says grinning. “Look it’s your crush at the rental shop.” Ashton kicks at him. 

“I don’t have a crush.” Ashton says.

“Good t’ knaw, mate.” Louis laughs and watches Ashton give him a freezing stare. “Don’t want t’ keep yer love waitin’, aye?” Louis chuckles and opens his car door. “See ye lads.” He sits down in the driver’s seat, while Ashton and Calum wave before they head over to the small rental shop. Louis drives out of the parking spot, and then backwards until he is eye level with the truck. 

He leans over and pushes open the door. With a quick look over the truck, Harry crawls into the passenger seat. Louis giggles when he sees him spider-walk to his seat. The door swings closed and Louis takes off. Harry’s seatbelt clicks into place, and he looks over at Louis. “Everything okay?” He asks timid.

“Yupp.” Louis says. “Just wanted t’ rub up against me car.” 

“Really?” Harry says, absent-mindedly. 

“Somethin’ about his step-father and him loving cars…” Louis trails off when he pulls into Harry’s street. 

“It’s nice to bond with step-family… Robin and I always had photography together.” Harry says, Louis looks over at him, while he’s slowing down a bit. Realising just how little he knows about the boy. “He helped me build a red room in Gemma’s old closet, so I can develop my own pictures.” Harry says, like it’s the most normal thing in the world.

“Ye goin’ t’ ‘ave t’ show it to me.” Louis says and pulls into Harry’s driveway. 

“Thanks for today.” Harry says. 

“Wait.” Louis says again. He stops out into the cold and opens the door for him again. Harry blushes, but takes his hand. Louis holds up his hand to say wait again. He walks to the boot of the car and gets out a dozen tulips. “Here.”

“O-oh, thank you.” Harry says, and he purses his lips in an attempt to hide his delight. 

“Can I…” Louis rubs the back of his neck, his gut quivering of nerves.

“Do you want to come in, Lou?” Harry saves him. 

Louis lights up, “yes, please.” 

“Hey-ho.” Gemma throws open the door grinning at the two. Harry’s hand is still hovering where he was trying to get the key in the key-hole. His hand was still shaking a bit, but he’s frowning now that he is looking at his sister. She’s grinning like a little shit, “saw you driving up. How was it, boys?” 

“Cold.” Harry says.

“Ripped me pants.” Louis tells her and pulls the coat off to show her. Gemma laughs loud. “Yeah, yeah, alright. Harold here saved me from embarrassment?” 

“That why you’re wearing the tiniest little jacket?” She asks her brother, who is pealing out of Louis’ bomber jacket.

“Oi!” He calls a little too loud, “who are ye callin’ tiny? I do take offence t’ tha’!” Gemma only scoofs, and Harry smiles at him over his shoulder. Louis follows the siblings into the kitchen.

“Hello Louis, nice to see you again so soon.” Harry’s father says. He is sipping on a beer, watching his son arrange the tulips in a vase. 

“Good t’ see ye too. Nice Christmas?” Louis asks, shoving his hands into his pockets. He watches Harry’s back, while Anne rubs him there.

“Look nice sweetie.” Anne whispers, giving Harry a small kiss to a burning hot ear.

“Spend it with both of my children. It was beautiful.” Des says, smiling at Louis. 

“I bet.” Louis nods.

“How was Christmas in the new house?” Anne asks him. 

“Grand. Much more space and Dan’s a good guy.” Louis keeps it short. He’s not quite sure if his mother already spread the news about her pregnancy. When he was small and Jay was expecting the twins, he had ran around the school announcing to everyone he was having siblings. Jay was not amused, still in the first trimester she gave him a talking, well more like screaming, to which was almost rivalling by Mrs. Weasley’s howler.

“Heard aboutthe news Louis! It’s so beautiful she’s expecting again.” Anne says, her eyes going a little watery. Harry turns around with the vase in his arms. 

“Yeah, Dan is … great.” Louis repeats. “Need help with tha’?” Louis points to the vase.

“No, no, it’s mine. I got it.” Harry says and waddles to the staircase. Louis follows him mechanically. 

“No funny business Harry!” Anne calls after them, and they can hear her arguing with Des about their son’s sexual behaviour. Harry waddles into his room, Louis throws himself onto the bed, while Harry places the tulips on the window sill. He smiles while he positions the red tulip to the centre. 

“Thank you, Lou.” Harry says, and grabs a headband to secure the most of his hair in a bun. The small extra hairs he clips up with hairpins.

“Welcome, baby.” Louis says, propping himself up by one elbow.

“Want to see my dark room?” Harry asks facing Louis. Louis stares at his features for a moment, taking in the small dimples which he pokes. The long gorgeous swing to his nose, he does have large nostrils, but Louis leans up to kiss the tip of it. 

“Yes.” He simply says and gets lifted to his feet by two large hands. Together they head into Gemma’s room. Her clothes are scattered everywhere.

“Sorry about the mess, she wasn’t blessed with the cleaning gene.” Harry says, before he walks over to a small double door.

“Didn’t knaw tha’ was a gene. Probably don’t ‘ave it either.” Louis teases him, and Harry pokes his tongue out at him. He opens the door and red light floods over his face. 

“Come on, get in.” Harry grabs Louis’ hand. The door’s creek closed, and Harry turns on a small light bulb dangling above their heads. He rubs his hands together, “so that’s the wet side and that’s the dry side.” Harry begins to explain. Louis looks around himself. It’s exactly how he imagined it, a large white clock hangs next to a washing line, where a few pictures are dripping off of. All around the small closet, a table stretches from side to side with four small plastic trays of what looks like water. Those are the developing chemicals. First, is the Developer, the fixer, stopper bath and the washer, which is just water. These are the tongs.” Harry picks up what looks like forceps.

“… and ye do this for all yer pictures?” Louis asks, stepping closer to the washing line and looking at a few pictures which are still getting developed.

“Uh… well… yeah.” Harry says shyly. Louis cocks his head to the left when he stares at one particular picture. 

“This me?” Louis asks, pointing to a picture, where a sweaty boy in a footie uniform is bending over to stretch his legs during half time. He’d recognise his own bum anywhere. Silently he swears to whatever football God is listening to him. Why does his team have such obscenely white shorts.

“Yes.” Harry says, and Louis is sure he is also blushing, but he’s bathed in the red light, so he can’t be sure. “I like when they wear those tiny shorts.” 

“They?” Louis turns to look at Harry, an eyebrow curved in amusement. 

“Yes, I don’t discriminate, I like multiple bums.” Harry says, looking back at Louis’ picture. A hand grazes over Louis behind, slips into the rip of his jeans and squeezes hard.

“Oi!” Louis giggles, “stop tha’.” Harry pouts, but nods. Louis wiggles his eyebrows before his hands roam down Harry’s front and give his half-hard cock a squeeze. 

“What are yo… what?” Harry wheezes out, head already spinning. 

“Makin’ use of an empty space sweet-cheeks. Wha’ yer mum can’t see…” Louis trails off and slips his knees to the floor. 

“Louis…” Harry says, eyes darting to the small door. Louis rolls his eyes, slips Harry’s scarf from around his neck. Harry hisses and rubs the back of his neck. Louis leans to the side and wraps the scarf around the two doorknobs to tie them closed. Harry’s eyes are dilated when Louis gives him a cocky grin and runs his hands up Harry’s thighs. Louis follows the seam of his jeans and enjoys the way Harry’s legs start to tremble. He’s biting his lips raw and closes his eyes when Louis’ nose rubs over his groin and starts mouthing at his cock. Harry helps him along and quickly unbuttons his pants. “Don’t know if I’m going to last long.” He says. Louis grins and pulls hard, they are basically painted on, down to his mid thigh. “Have been watching your bum hang out of your pants all day.” Harry complains. 

Louis just tongues his underwear, where he can feel his cock go rigid. Louis’ hands move upwards under Harry’s shirt. He leans up on his knees to lick across the small patch of skin just above the hem of his boxers. He sucks in on the skin. Harry hums above him, and he can feel the large hand runs through his hair. He tugs on Harry’s extra nipple, making Harry’s leg twitch, before he lets his hand sink to pull his underwear down. “Gorgeous,” he mumbles. He sucks in Harry’s tip, remembering Harry liked it being circled with his tongue. With one hand he cradles his balls and starts rubbing them together. He sucks hard and taking more into his mouth. 

“Lou… Louis, you look so good.” Harry moans. “Should take another picture of you.” Louis stop sucking and looks up at him, spit dripping down on his chin. With his left hand he grabs into the meaty thigh. 

“Why don’t ye?” Louis asks and licks the underside of Harry’s twitching cock.

“Why don’t I?” Harry says feverish.

“Yeah, why don’t ye? Show me how this developing shit works.” Loui says and takes Harry back into his mouth. His hand moves between his thighs, tickles his balls and rubs his hand behind to lie flat on Harry’s right cheek. He pulls Harry closer into his mouth by his hand against his buttocks. 

“Oh fuck, Oh fuck. Louis… I can’t.” Harry says, hands shivering from the pleasure while he holds the camera above his own head.

“Come on, yer the best photographer I kna…. do it.” Louis says before he kisses his balls and moves back upwards. There are a few clicks once Louis has him back in his mouth and Louis hums around him. 

“Got it.” Harry pants. 

“Great.” Louis giggles when he pulls off and starts jacking him off quickly. 

“I’m coming…” Harry warns, before Harry’s come covers Louis’ face. “Good?” 

“Real good.” Harry says, Louis pulls Harry’s underwear back on to his hips and rubs his face all over Harry’s clothed cock. “All gone?” Louis asks, staring up at Harry. He’s looking back with dark eyes and still bathed in red. 

“Yeah,” Harry says, mouth agape. Louis helps him rock the pants back up his leg and Harry has to jump a little just to get them back on his hips. 

“Now show me how t’ develop this.” Louis says, eager to see himself giving Harry pleasure. They spend the next 90 minutes in the red room. Louis listens to Harry explain the different chemicals and watches his dainty figure carefully move around the room. They talk about Harry’s dad and Louis’ sisters. Louis’ tea-making skills and Harry’s difficulty of coming out. 

“Do you want me to return the favour?” Harry asks, just as the picture is starting to appear. Harry’s tongue is poking out while his hand is Louis’ hair, who is crouching over his cock. It’s an interesting feeling seeing himself do something so explicit. His cock twitches again, because he hadn’t come, and he can feel a flush all over his face.

“Yer mum said no funny business.” Louis says and opens the door again, so they can get back to Harry’s warm bed. “Naughty boy.” Louis mumbles against his side, and this time he can see Harry turn red.

Louis sticks to his back, plastering kisses down his neck and whines “carry me.” Harry drops to his knees and Louis fits himself on his back. Harry piggybacks him to the bed before dropping him uncaring on the bed. Louis giggles when he keeps his legs secured around Harry’s hips dragging him down with him. Harry scoots along his body, to kiss him on the lips. Harry’s hands run along his sides, trying to slip them over his tummy. 

“Harry.” Louis says. “ehm…”

“Yeah?” Harry asks, nuzzling his face into Louis neck and leaving little kisses wherever his breath hits first.

“Earlier… at the rink… I… I’m just paranoid, okay? I don’t… I don’t want to make ye feel uncomfortable around me… I’m sorry I acted like a prick.” Louis says, heart hammering against Harry’s hand which is resting over it. 

“Oh!” Harry says, roaming his eyes all over his face. “I don’t want to out you.” 

“Cheers.” Louis says, trying to keep a straight face. He always knew he was bad at communication. But confrontations make him laugh, and he can feel the giggles run through him. 

“No, Louis, I mean it. I was being stupid, because I am out. I keep forgetting that you aren’t.” He bites down on his own lips. 

“Tha’s okay.”Louis giggles. He tries to control the fit he knows is about to take control of him.

“Okay.” Harry says and nips at Louis’ bottom lip. “But I will start to try better. Promise. Iremember how panicky I was when I was in the closet.” Louis tries to stretch his neck, to look away from Harry, but Harry’s face follows him. He takes a few breaths and allows Harry to leave kisses on his lips, fitting their groins together. Louis groans. “While we are talking, though.” Harry says, and Louis feels his stomach drop. 

Before Harry can say anything Louis tries to cut him off, “I knaw the date didn't go as planned. I fucked up, sorry.” 

“Oh, Louis stop.” Harry says, sitting up and the pressure on Louis’ cock disappears. He grabs at Harry’s arm, trying to pull him back on top of him, spreading his knees apart a bit better. But Harry stays where he is. “It was perfect, I already forgot about all the other stuff.” 

“Right,” Louis says, unconvinced, and pulls at his jumper. 

“Yes it was,” Harry insists. “But… you said… I was afraid you were going to just drive off.” Harry says, and his hands replace Louis’ at the bottom of the maroon jumper. “And… I was.” Harry says. Louis’ feels dizzy, and his hand grabs Harry’s bicep to centre himself better. 

Louis clears his throat and closes his eyes, trying to regain his sight. “I don’t want ye to feel like I will leave any time soon.” He says and opens his eyes to stare into Harry’s hopeful ones. “I’m here to stay.” He cups Harry’s jaw and kisses him. He giggles against Harry’s smile, “throw me I’ll sink like an anchor.” 

“I like nautical signs.” Harry says. The door swings open. 

“MUM!!!!” Gemma screams over her shoulder, “Harry is fucking his boyfriend up the ass!” 

“GEMMA!” Anne screams up the stairs in shock. “Get out of your brother’s room, right now!” 

“I see you.” Gemma says, pointing two fingers against her eyes and then back at the couple still leaning over each other. 

“Sorry,” Harry whines against his neck. “My sister is weird.”

“Be glad ye only ‘ave one!” Louis says, lifting Harry’s lips back to his.

“Stupid mingling blonde-y.” Harry mumbles frowning. Louis chuckles. 

💚🍑💙

The New Year’s party end up at Niall’s house. Dan and Jay allowed him to go until half past midnight, because he returned the car safely. Barbara is dressed in a pink tutu with white tights and high-heels which make her taller than Harry, when she opens the door for Louis and Harry. “We brought snacks!” Harry says cheerfully. He raises the bowl he is carrying filled with tacos, Louis favourite meal, and nods to the avocado dip in Louis hand. 

“Just the carrier.” Louis says. Barbara fist-bumps and leads them into the kitchen. “Want a drink?” Louis asks Harry, leaving the babe off of the sentence.

“Sure.” Harry says, “no beer, though. Don’t drink that.” Louis nods and steps next to Liam who is slurping on a drink which smells obscenely like alcohol. 

“Tha’ll smash ye.” Louis says.

“Sure will. Need this tonight.” Liam shrugs.

“Why?” Louis asks and starts mixing something for Harry and himself.

“Mum found me in bed with someone this morning. She was trying to ban me from coming here tonight.” Liam says, taking an olive into his mouth.

“Really? Who?” Louis asks, vodka hovering too long over one of the drinks, but the alcohol still flowing down into the glass below. “Shit.” He lifts the glass and sniffs the drink. “Tha’ll be mine then. Don’t want to be at fault when Harry starts talking to a mailbox.” 

“Yeah, he is a lightweight. Just a little warning he does get clingy at times.” Liam says. 

“I once had to bike home with him piggy bagging, because he refused to let go.” Niall says, stepping up to the two.

“That was one time, one time!” Harry complains all the way over on the other side of the kitchen.

“Awe, Harry. You are so cute.” Taylor says and bumps her shoulder into Barbara. “I can see your nipples by the way.” She says pointing at Harry’s black sheer dress shirt. There are some roses embroidered on it, but it is entirely see-through. Harry’s hands snap up to his nipples. Then crouches to dig his elbows towards his ribs.

“Which ones? I have four of them, so which ones?” He fake panics. “Now you made me self-conscious. I will have to walk around all day like this.” Harry continues joking. Louis tries to keep the growing smile off of his face when he looks at him to try to cover all of his beautiful pink buds.

“Got the good stuff.” Zayn says and throws a baggie of green grass on the counter. 

“Cheers mate.” Niall grins at him. Zayn nods, and lets his body fall next to Barbara. Zayn feels Louis look on his face and their eyes meet, before he rolls his eyes and stares right at Liam and winks. 

Louis can feel more than see Liam shiver and straighten before he walks over to the raven-haired boy to talk to him. Louis turns to Niall, who seemed to be in his own thoughts staring into Liam’s back. “Have ye every noticed how no one talks to Zayn, and then Liam comes to his rescue and everyone suddenly wants to start talking to him?” 

“I don’t have a problem with him. Life is too short to walk around with so much hate Louis.” Niall says and gulps down some beer.

“Ye sound like a horoscope.” Louis says. Niall just shrugs again. “Ye knaw who he slept with?” Louis asks. Niall turns around to him, mouth-agape, obviously shocked Louis hasn’t figured it out yet. “Fine, don’t tell me.” Louis says snarky. 

“Harry’s right you are so blind sometimes! Astonishing.” Niall says and opens his arms, so Barbara can fit herself into his side.

“Sorry about the girls being here.” Barbara says.

“Don’t mind. The more the merrier.” Louis says.

Barbara exchanges a glance with her boyfriend before she says, “I was more thinking along the lines of New Year’s kiss… which you can’t have right now, since the girls are here.” Louis’ heart starts to beat faster, and the tips of his hands feel awfully cold. He tries to rub them together, against each other in a vague attempt to see if he still has a vague sense of feel.

Louis bites his lips, guilt flooding him. Besides the coldness overtaking him, there is a dull heartbeat in his brain scolding him for not thinking about it. He can’t remember if he ever really had a New Year’s kiss, ever. “Hand’t thought of that.” Louis says honestly. Still there is the tiny voice whispering the same chilling words over and over again: _Barbara knows._

“Harry for sure has.” Barbara says into Niall’s armpit. 

Right then, Harry walks over, his hips swaying a bit. Louis sees how Harry is definitely feeling his outfit tonight. He leans next to Louis against the counter. His lips tickle Louis, and his voice sends a warm air into him when he says, “you already hard for me baby? I can see the tip of your cock pressing against those tight pants of yours.” A shiver runs through Louis, and goosebumps slide up over his arms. Louis looks down at himself, how can he still be hard after feeling like death itself moved through his veins.

“Barbara knows?” He quietly whispers back, he wiggles his toes, and they feel cold too. The sly grin falling off of his face and Harry’s eyes go shadowy. A little thing which Louis noticed means he’s confused.

“We were just talking about New Year’s kisses.” Niall says next to them nodding towards Taylor and Danielle, who are fiddling with the speakers.

“Oh right.” Harry looks a little upset now.

Barbara points at something behind them, across the living room. “Right there on the patio, there’s this tiny alcove you can stuff in to kiss.” Barbara says, “we’ll just have to block you from annoying views. But we got it covered.”

“Why didn’t you lead with this?” Louis says, his voice, he notices sadly, isn’t very strong. Barbara shrugs, but it is clear she was testing him. Harry leans against Louis’ arm, trying to give him some sense of warmth. Louis shakes his body a bit, trying to lose the sensation and puts the drink down. “I’ll be right back.” _Barbara knows._

Louis walks around the sharp corner and flees into the bathroom. He breathes through his nose one long breath and lets it puff out through his mouth. _Barbara knows._ He wets his hands and pats his face. Louis’ hand sneaks up his tight long-sleeve and grabs his heart, like he was trying to hold on to it with his bare hand. His vision goes frenzy, and he tries to hold down the sobs racking his body. _Barbara knows._ He tries battling with his thoughts and his body. His gut twitches and sends shocks of pain through his body. He leans against the wall and lets his bum fall onto the cold white tile. _Barbara knows_. “So what!” Louis tells the cold voice, “so she knows, so Niall, Barbara, Zayn, Liam and mum know… wait, his family knows… his entire fockin’ family knows too.” Louis breathes in harshly. “Calm down.” Louis whispers to himself, slowly taping his index finger against his heart, so it starts pounding in the right beats. Slowly it starts to work, and he can feel warmth spread back into his toes. He stands up and enjoys the head rush for a moment. “Get a beer, and fock the calm down!” Louis tells himself, before he rushes to the door.

He storms out and feels like someone grab at his shoulder. “Louis.” 

“Sorry.” Louis says, apologising for using the bathroom for so long. He shakes his shoulder and the hand falls off. 

“Louis!” Liam says again, “are you okay?” Louis turns around surprised. _Liam_! “Just saw you running away.” Louis nods, and rushes to him to be engulfed in a tight hug. “What happened Louis?” 

“Nothin’. I’m okay.” He lies against Liam’s shoulder, and fights tears again. It’s always like that. When he feels emotionally shocked and someone tries to talk to him about it or hug him, he wants to cry. “Just ye knaw…” Louis frees himself again and wipes away some tears, “just a lot, a little over-whelming.” Louis sniffles.

“What is?” Liam asks, and tries to look past Louis to magically see what overwhelmed Louis.

“Feels like…” Louis begins, “I’m not sure I can say it.” 

“Try, please.” Liam insists, eyes focused on Louis’ welling eyes.

Louis coughs once, and then confesses “feels like… everyone knows I’m gay.” 

“Are you?” Liam asks, a kind smile tickling at his mouth. 

“Yes.” Louis says without thinking.

“Not even a bit bi?” Liam grins. 

“No. I’m so gay. I’d outshine the moon, mate.” Louis says with finality. 

Liam wipes at a fake tear, “I’m proud, Louis. Look at where we came from?” 

“Shut up daddy-Liam.” Louis rolls his eyes, “oh sorry,” he says holding up his hands. “I forgot, ye like bein’ called tha’.” Liam hits him against the chest, but he’s giggling. 

“Should never have told you.” Liam mumbles, music starts blaring from the living room, and a loud appreciative squeal, probably belonging to Harry, rips through the air. 

“Ye didn’t, tickled out of ye.” Louis grins, tears forgotten. He turns to walk back to the party.

“Hey… I… I actually need to tell you something too.” Liam says, picking with his fingers under his fingernails. Louis turns his body to face him again. 

“Yeah…?” he asks. He isn’t used to Liam being this nervous. It’s almost cute, if it weren’t this concerning.

“I… Zayn and me… we have been…” Liam slowly says one after another.

“Alright lads? Coming back?” Niall asks, sticking his head into the hallway.

“ ‘Course.” Liam says, cheerfully. He pretends as if he hadn’t started to tell Louis something. Louis doesn’t want to push it. Liam never pushed him either. He masks his face with a smile and joins the other two into the living room. He can clearly see Harry swinging his hips. His full mouthed smile sings along to “Whenever wherever, we’re meant to be together.” The girls try to imitate the circling hips of Shakira, which they fail at.Louis can’t help himself but smile at Harry, when their eyes meet over the heads of the others. Louis closes his eyes and lets his hips swing similarly, with a hand on Liam’s wrist he joins the girls on the dance floor. 

“You look obscene doing that.” Harry giggles into his ear. 

“It’s all about tha’ bum, baby.” Louis shouts back and grins at the taller boy, moving himself, so Harry can see him from the back. He can feel Harry bite his own lips, rather than seeing him. He lets his head fall back into his nape, staring up at the white ceiling. Drifting his eyes closed, he falls to the music. His feet jumping to the rhythm of the beat, and his hips sway to the lyrics of the songs. He can feel sweat peal at his lower back, drip between his bum cheeks. His fringe is getting drenched by the minute, falling from one side to the other.

“Louis? A beer?” Danielle’s voice travels to his ear. He opens his eyes and stares at her. Slowly Louis weighs his options. Will she poison him for letting her down? Her big smile doesn’t waver, and Louis is not sure if its something positive or negative. He’s not a psychologist, nor did he ever watch the show about telling lies.

“Ye poison it?” Louis laughs. _Since when am I paranoid?_ _Maybe, because Barbara knows._

“No.” She says and frowns. “Lou, I’m not mad.” She says, and Louis can feel goosebumps on his damp skin. He doesn’t like the way she uses Harry’s nickname for himself. It sounds all wrong when it runs off her tongue.

“Well, thanks.” Louis shrugs. 

“Mind if I dance with you?” Danielle asks, and Louis doesn’t see how he can worm himself out of this one. He shrugs again, and she takes it as a yes. Her hands roam around his neck and presses herself against him. Her soft pelvis rubs against his crotch, and Louis tries to place his free hand on her hip to push her off a bit. She frowns but turns to rub her bum against his thighs. He never realised how small she is. Danielle grabs his free hand and runs it around her hip, making them one to sway. 

Louis looks away from the wrong brown hair stuffed into his nose and lifts the beer bottle to his lip. He lets the cold brew run down his throat and cool him down. His eyes roam the people around them, for the first time taking everything in. The sofa is squished to the side where Barbara and Niall are having a heavy discussion. It looks like friendly banter more than anything. Outside he can see a few fireworks exploding already, and he looks to see if Niall’s father hang a clock anywhere. _What time is it? When is New Year?_ Just as he is about to think about his New Year’s kiss, when his eyes find him. Harry. He’s standing in the kitchen, staring right back at him. He’s holding a beer bottle in each hand. From his bottle to Louis and back Harry looks. He’s fighting the sadness in his eyes. And then he walks off, his long legs take him much faster than Louis. Louis who rips free of Danielle and runs after him. “Hazza!!!!” He calls.

Harry doesn’t look back. But he stops and sags against the wall opposite a door which leads to one of the bedrooms. “I… I knew we’d have to hide for some time.” Harry whispers, when Louis kneels down between his legs. Out of instinct, Louis looks around himself, down the hall if anyone sees them, before his hands find each knee. He squeezes them. “I didn’t know it hurts this bad.” Harry says. 

“Ye jealous, baby?” Louis tries to sound light, but even to him, it sounds dead and serious.

“Yes.” Harry says and sniffs. 

Louis lets himself fall on his bum and sighs heavily. “I didn’t knaw all yer friends knaw about us!” 

“They don’t. Just Niall and Liam.” Harry says, sniffing again. 

“And Barbara and Zayn. And yer entire family, babe.” Louis says, but gives the knees a squeeze to calm him.

“Zayn’s your friend.” Harry says. “He betrayed me, remember?” Louis stares at the dark green eyes, and he remembers the way he looked when his jaw was blue and green. The black eye. He remembers how Zayn betrayed him, betrayed them all for the very first time. He accidentally tries to ball up his hands, and Harry winces.

“Sorry.” 

“Anyway. He knows, because you told him.” Harry says. “Barbara knows, because she overheard me whine about you once. And Niall is her boyfriend, we spend a lot of time together. The three of us. My family knows, because I trust them and I want them to know when I’m happy.” 

“Ye’re happy, Hazza?” Louis asks, a smile forming on his lips. Harry hits him against the shoulder playfully. 

“Shut up.” He vaguely tries to push it away. 

“Ye’re happy!” Louis says with a strong voice. He scoots closer, ignoring the pull of his heart telling him how many people are in the living room. How many could see them. Together. He bobs their noses against each other and Harry giggles. It’s the sweetest sound in the world. “Harold Styles…”

“It’s Harry Edward actually.” Harry interjects and Louis rolls his eyes. 

“Fine. Can I continue?” Louis sasses back. Harry gives him a curd nod. “Harry Edward Styles, I promise to make ye happy for the rest of our days. As long as I live, there will not be a day where ye aren’t happy.” He seals the promise with a kiss to the lips. Harry’s beat red when he’s done. 

“A life-time promise, Lou?” Harry asks, and Louis can feel the warmth of the nickname spread through him. 

“Yeah! With you I’m either in or out. Nothing in between.” Louis says, repeating the words Harry had said to him at his mother’s wedding. Harry surges forward and attaches their lips in a heated embrace. He sucks at his bottom lip, and Louis willingly opens his mouth. Harry’s tongue licks his bottom lips, dips beneath his bottom lip, hitting his bottom teeth lightly. Their lips suck each other in, Harry’s thicker lips against Louis smaller ones, in perfect symmetry. Harry presses his lips open to let his tongue slip in. When their tongues meet Louis can feel himself steer in his pants. 

His hands circle the inside of Harry’s knees, caresses him there, and finally pulls him on top of his lap. Harry wiggles his bum on his groin and feels Louis’ cock grow underneath him. Louis groans into his mouth, “hmmm…. Haz… Harry…” Louis moans while Harry keeps rocking against Louis’ clothed cock. 

“Harry, who are you making out with now?” Taylor’s voice echoes in the hall. Louis freaks, choosing flight before fight. But Harry has a murderous grip on him, pushing him down. He protects Louis’ face in his neck and lets his hair fall over his head. 

“Fuck off, Tay!” Harry calls back. Louis holds himself still as he can, hands pushed underneath Harry’s sheer blouse. Taylor mutters something, and angrily storms into the bathroom. “Shit, I’m sorry. She didn’t see anything, promise darling.” 

Louis leaves a short kiss to his neck, “let’s just get a room.” 

“Yes… good. Good thought.” Harry says, standing up and pulling Louis with him. Louis crowds against Harry, and pulls his locks away to kiss the nape of his neck.

“Find us a bed, pumpkin plum.” Harry giggles from the new nickname and rushes to the bedroom door. His hand clutches around the doorknob, and Louis pinches his bum when the door creeks open. 

Louis’ hands freeze on Harry’s hips. Breath caught in his throat from what he is seeing. He thinks he wants to scream, make their presence known to the couple in front of them. A blush crosses up the neck and colours Harry’s ears. The body Louis is still holding on to is trying to move backwards, hips bumping into his. “Lou…” Harry says while he pushes backwards. But Louis’ feet are frozen to the ground, like they are stuck in tarmac. “Lou… please, this is inappropriate.” 

Liam moans then, and Louis feels his eyes burn. The raven-haired head bobs in-between Liam’s legs. _Liam and Zayn, Zayn and Liam. What the fuck? Honestly? Is this what he was trying to tell me? What is Zayn’s game? Why is he playing Liam?_ “What the actual fuck?” Louis says loudly. 

“Louis!” Harry scolds him. He turns into Louis arms, trying to make the smaller boy move out of eye-shot. But Louis stands on his tiptoes, looking over Harry’s shoulder. Zayn is leaning back, staring at him, brushing a finger over the corner of his mouth. Liam is standing, eyes wide open in shock, hands fumbling over the button of his jeans. 

“Louis, what are you doing here?” Liam tries to say.

“Being a masochist obviously.” Zayn says, evil springing out of his eyes. 

“It’s called voyeur.” Harry says, holding on to Louis’ side.

“Whatever,” Zayn rolls his eyes and fishes a warn pack of cigarettes out of his back pocket and lights it. 

“What the fuck is yer game with him?” Louis asks. Winding out of Harry’s embrace, he stalks in to the room. His clenched fists on his hips he stares down at Zayn, whose face is lit up by the glow of the cigarette bud. “Why ye doin’ this t’ him?” Louis asks louder. Zayn narrows his eyes, a heavy grey cloud escaping from his nostrils. “Ye fucker. What’s yer play?” Louis says. Harry’s hand drops to Louis’ forearm and tries to pull him away. Louis’ eyes drop back on Zayn’s hand, which is lazily lying on top of his strong thigh. 

“Leave him alone, Louis.” Liam says. Zayn’s fingernails are black. 

“Since when do ye paint yer nails?” Louis asks, putting as much disgust into the few words as possible. He can feel Harry’s fingernails puncture on his skin. 

Zayn swings his hips while he stands, a motion which is almost erotic. Like an exotic courtesan he approaches Louis and blows out another smoke in Harry’s face. “I thought that’s what your type likes.” He whispers into Louis’ ear. Louis tackles him against the closet. Before he can punch him in the face, he gets ripped away from him by Harry’s strong arms around his tummy. 

“Louis stop it. Please.” He says into his ear. Harry puts Louis back down on his own feet. 

Liam is ushering Zayn out the door. Louis watches the two leave. “What the fuck is his game, Harry?” Louis asks, his voice still an octave higher. “Don’t ye see? Can’t any of ye see? How…how much he’s playin’ him!” Louis screams, Harry rubs his arms lightly. Louis pushes away his arms, “oh fuck off.” 

He runs out into the hall looking for Liam. Niall tells him he’s outside, smoking. _Which pft, like Liam smokes!?_ Louis rushes outside. Liam is leaning against the fence, two fingers holding a cigarette. The tip is glowing, but Liam is simply rolling it between his hands. “He’s playing ye!” Louis screams, Liam looks up. “He’s using ye t’ get t’ us.” 

Liam runs a hand over his face, “argh… Louis!” He says tiredly. Louis jumps a little when a firework goes off with a loud bang.

“It’s his only way back t’ us, don’t ye see? He’s using ye, because no one else from our friends will! It’s his only way t’ still hang with us.” Louis babbles on, adrenaline shooting through his veins.

“LOUIS!” Liam screams, finally meeting his eyes. “All the time… every single fucking time you had an issue with Harry. Or we’re crying your eyes out about it, I let you vent. I let you clear your conscience. I let you believe that you didn’t just totally fuck everything up!” Liam says sternly, but not loudly. Just like he is scolding his son. “I let you believe there was hope. So please, for the love of God, be on my side. Return the favour!” 

Louis stares at him gobsmacked. He can’t quite figure out how to close his mouth again. _God-damn, he’s so fucking right!_ Louis swallows the guilty lump in his throat, “just had to say it once.” Liam blinks and nods. “I’ll get us a beer and then ye’re goin’ t’ tell me how this happened, alright?” Liam nods again. 

Both Liam and Louis are leaning against the fence. Each leisurely holding a beer in their hands. Louis is sucking on a cigarette, the little filter already drenched in spit. They’re both looking into the sky watching the few early fireworks which crackle loudly in the sky. “I don’t know how it happened.” Liam says. “Just started at some point.” 

“Ye got t’ knaw when tha’ was, mate.” Louis says, thinking back to the concert where he rudely forced Harry to suck his cock. He makes a mental note to apologise to Harry for this later. 

“I don’t know what to say… it just happened at some time.” Liam says, frustrated he sucks on the bottle top.

“Okay, well… just think back when it first happened.” Louis says, sucking on his cigarette again. It’s a bit gross sucking on the wet patch of paper.

“When you and Harry started dating.” Liam says, Louis looks at him surprised.

“Me and Harry?” Louis asks.

“Yeah… it just…” Liam nervously sucks on his bottom lip, closing his eyes. “Made me wonder you know? You kept talking about what Harry and you would do together. You know, the sexual things he would do to you.” Louis can feel his own cheeks heating up, the chilling new years air being a welcome cold wind on his face. “I got curious. Zayn only noticed during the college trip, when you were all over Harry. I wanted to know what it felt like.”

“I thought ye only had mornin’ wood.” Louis whispers.

“Kind of… not really. Can’t really explain it.” Liam says.

“I understand.” Louis says. “Ye actually explained it very well.” 

Liam takes another heavy drink, “Zayn was sleeping in the same bed as me. He put two and two together.”

“And he just started suckin’ yer cock?” Louis asks lightly. He feels a laugh burst through him and break through his lips. Liam looks at him with a grimace, but Louis gives him a good-natured shove. Liam doesn’t move an inch, but a smile travels over his face. Then he giggles and joins Louis’ laughter.

“Yeah, I suppose so yes.” Liam laughs, and Louis wipes the tears off of his face. 

“Alright everyone outside!” They hear Niall scream behind them. He ushers all of his friends into the backyard. Liam and Louis walk over to the small patio and Louis snuggles up to Harry. 

“I’ll hide you.” Liam winks. 

“Where is this hide-out alcove of yours?” Louis asks into Harry’s ear. He ignores the way Taylor gives him a weird look. Harry pushes him to the alcove, a small little dent in the far-right wall. Liam and Niall with Barbara make a small wall in front of them. Over Liam’s shoulder he can see Zayn leaning against the glass door, breathing through a blunt. His dark eyes are trained on Louis, and Louis looks away. It’s like ice drove into his veins, like Zayn could see everything he is and who he is. Louis takes Harry’s right arm and snakes it around his shoulders. 

“7… 6… 5…” Taylor and Danielle announce loudly. 

“Next year is our year, Hazza.” Louis says. Harry looks down on him, nose scrunched up and eyes tearily. 

“3… 2…”

“To our year, Lou!” Harry whispers while he ducks down. Louis pushes up on to his tip toes. 

“HAPPY NEW YEAR!” Everyone calls. Their lips touch, while loud cheers echo around them. Loud banging alarms them that the sky colours from the fireworks. Just like his insides explode, tingling in his gut, below his stomach. His fingertips feel like electric currents travelling through him like a web. Harry’s tongue touches his top lip, just a tiny little lap. Louis’ hand tangles in his hair, attempting to hold him tighter against himself. He wants more. He lowers back to the ground. 

“Already the best year.” Louis whispers against Harry’s lips. He turns to look at Liam and grabs his upper arm. “Thank ye for everythin’! Truly!”

“Thank you!” Liam grips Louis harshly by the small of his back. Louis breathes him in and gives him a quick peck to the cheek. _How could I ‘ave survived this place without ye?_ Louis thinks to himself. Liam’s eyes seem to answer him _you wouldn’t have._ But neither says the painfully true words. Instead, Liam looks up to look at Zayn, something uncomfortable written all over his face. Guilt floods Louis again, _I shouldn’t have grown the seed in his head._

Harry winds out of Niall’s embrace and goes over to the other girls to hug them too, and Louis hates the way his mind burns their faces for touching his boy. He ignores it and congratulates Niall. Taylor was good for one thing: Fireworks. Niall almost catches on fire when he lights the few fireworks. Louis uses his exaggerated jumping of joy to warm up. He can hear Harry giggle behind him, watching the sky light up. 

Louis sees the same kind of giggle joy later in Harry’s eyes when Louis drags him up the Styles’ stairs. He drops Harry on the pink bedsheet a few seconds later, and closes the door with a soft click. Harry pulls on his clothes. Louis grins, “got t’ take all the joy, ‘ave ye?” Louis laughs, and Harry presses his hands over his own mouth. It’s as if Harry tries to shove Louis’ laughter down his own throat. Louis giggles, while he peels the clothes off his body. Harry stopped in his own efforts and looks at him with big round eyes. Louis grins and plays with the hem of his boxers, he turns around, so his bottom is sticking out to Harry’s green eyes. Slowly, very slowly he pulls them down his short legs stepping out of them, his naked bum mooning Harry. He flings the boxers away and peeks over his shoulder like a French girl in the old films. “Want to paint me, Harry?”

“I want to take pictures of you.” Harry says. Louis’ eyebrows shoot up into his hairline. It was meant to be a joke. Harry falls off the bed with a raised finger before he grabs a camera. He gets back into position, subconsciously Louis cradles his cock. Harry makes a few clicks with his camera. “Wait.” He says. He rushes around the room, and suddenly he stops in front of Louis. “Look up.” He says so strongly, Louis wonders if he stopped being as drunk as he was just a second ago. 

Louis looks up, “wow, wow, wow, what’s that?” He quickly stares at the tiny brush in Harry’s hand which he only knows from his sister’s hands. He’s holding up his hands and fixing Harry with squinted blues. 

“Relax, it’s only for the picture. It’ll make your eyes pop.”

“Pop.” Louis repeats.

“Yes,” Harry giggles, “pop.” He pops both ‘p’s, like sucking on a sticky lollipop. Louis rolls his eyes, but decides to look up none-the-less. Harry starts applying the black gummy massacre to his long eyelashes. He can’t help but smile satisfied when he sees Harry’s awe in the way his mouth hangs open, salivating over his eyes.

The taller boy walks around him again and starts taking pictures of his back. Louis turns around, Harry’s cold hand on his hips pops Louis hip. His bum tilts backwards, “don’t take a pic of me bumhole!“ Louis squeals.

“Can’t see it.“ Harry rolls his eyes and snaps a picture or two of Louis’ bum. “Do you want to wear my knickers?“ Harry asks like it’s the most normal thing in the world.

“What? No!” Louis turns around to him, cock bobbing in between his thighs. “ The fuck Harold? Do ye ‘ave knickers?”

Harry colours, “no of course not!” His camera stopped flashing.

“Show me!” Louis says hurling himself on top of Harry. Harry tries to wiggle away, but Louis pins Harry down by his hips. He nuzzles Harry’s cock mouthing at where his tip pokes into the material. “Ye mean t’ tell me I can see yer beautiful cock in some lacy knickers?” He asks Harry’s dick. 

“You really want to?” Harry asks all quiet and insecure. 

“Harry, yes!” Louis rubs his nose along his length. 

“Okay, okay, gimme a min.” Harry moans and wiggles off of the bed. He grabs a shoebox under the bed and pulls something red out. He quickly undresses, falling over at least twice and reappearing at the edge of the bed with nothing but red knickers. They’re all red, his cock bulges against the thin material and a large bow rests where Louis can see the beginning of Harry’s erection. This time Louis goggles him. He crawls forward until his nose dibs into his length.

“Oh baby, ye can barely fit can ye?” Louis asks, rubbing along the straining length. He can feel the vein on the underside pulsate. “Do ye get off in these?” He asks Harry who is biting his lips. Louis shifts to lean up on his knees, dip his lips against his neck.

“Sometimes,” Harry moans. “Think of you. Seeing me in them.” Louis harshly bites him where he can feel his muscle stretch to give him more room. 

“Am I livin’ up t’ yer expectation?” Louis asks him, very interested in knowing the truth.

“Fuck yes.” Harry moans, a small wet patch gathers on the lingerie at the tip of his cock. Louis bites down his neck and licks down his torso. He engulfs his left nipple and swivels his tongue of the strong pink bud. Harry whines. 

“Sensitive nipples?” Louis asks, making sure he gets this information down right. Harry nods his head, curls tickling Louis’ forehead. Louis chuckles and bites his bud pulling at it a bit. 

“Ow.” Harry says. 

“Shit sorry.” Louis apologises quickly, rubbing his thumb over the reddened skin.

“Just very sensitive there.” Harry says. Louis hums to himself. 

“Really?” He contemplates and touches the tiny little buds on his lower ribcage. “What about these? Are they sensitive too?” Harry only nods again, watching Louis with heated eyes.

Louis bends down to kiss those too. He laps at them for a few minutes, as if he could coax something out of them. Harry moans, and Louis slips his hand into the knickers to free the head of his cock from the underwear. “Louis!” 

“Yeah, love?” 

“More.” Harry manages to say, and Louis lets his teeth graze against his right nipple. He attaches their lips in a feverish tongue-filled kiss. It gets heated, and the two of them drop on top of each other on the sheets. Louis breathes in Harry’s sent still lingering on the sheets, and turns his face, so Harry can deepen the kiss and press his wet tip against Louis rigged standing cock. In unison, they moan into each other’s mouths. Louis’ hands grip for Harry’s tiny perky bum. He squeezes harshly. “Mhhm naahhh.” Harry whines when their cock-heads rub against each other. 

Louis pries Harry’s bum cheeks apart, a finger itching closer to the golden vault. Harry pops off his lip. “You feel perfect, sweet-cheeks.” Louis whispers against his neck, while is fingered rubs over the strong muscle. 

“Lou… I… I’m not ready.” Harry says. Louis blinks up at him, confusion clouding his sex-crazed mind. 

“Ready? Wha’ do ye mean?” Louis asks and kisses Harry’s plumb lips.

“I’m not ready for… sex.” Harry says. “I mean penetrative sex.” Louis finally understands staring at him. And finally it clicks. 

“Oh… right. I won’t push ye. Just…” He kisses him, “let me knaw when yer ready.” He remembers all the warnings his mother gave him not to guilt a girl into giving him her virginity. Respecting someone’s decision was one of Johanna’s most important rules at home. Louis supposes it as true for boys as it is for girls. “I can wait.” He says finally when he kisses him harshly. 

Harry response in time, rolling his hips down harder against Louis groin. Their cocks rubbing up and down against each other, sliding softly, Harry’s pre-cum easing the way. Harry’s hanging balls brush his tentatively like a strong repeating pressure. Louis throws his head back moaning loudly. 

“I’m goin’ t’ come!” Louis warns Harry.

“Wait for me.” Harry whines behind Louis ear where he’s sucking on.

“Harr-. God, hurry up.” Louis moans, feeling his balls tighten. Harry pushes himself up by his strong arms and starts humping Louis’ cock strongly. “Shit… shit… baby, I’m sorry.” He says, veins popping on his neck. 

“Oh God Lou.” Harry says, speeding up. His bum feels tight as a rock, where Louis’ hand is still gripping into it. Harry is staring down at their cocks, curls covering his eyes from Louis’ view. Louis can feel himself softening, but Harry is still rubbing against him. He feels the slight strain of his balls just coming and trying to re-animate from Harry’s hard quick thrusts. Louis can see Harry’s balls pull closer to his body before Harry releases a long groan and white liquid floods all over Louis’ cock and pelvis. “Uh…” Harry groans when he falls on top of Louis and rolls off of him. “Shit sorry.” 

“I look a mess, love.” Louis chuckles, while he watches Harry draw figures in their joint come puddle. Harry lifts one finger to his mouth and moans when he slurps it off. Then he dips down and licks some off like a tiny kitten. “Haz, please. Me cock’s tired.” 

Harry giggles when he looks up again, the tip of his nose white. “Sorry. Wait here, bathroom.” He says pointing to the door. 

“I can’t very well move.” Louis rolls his eyes in fondness watching Harry jog off. The curly haired boy ends up washing Louis with a damn cloth, and removes his mascara with one of Gemma’s face-wipes. Then he helps the dead-to-the-world Louis under the blankets, and they fall asleep tugged into each other.

💚🍑💙

Louis wakes up a few hours later, and stares at Harry sleeping. His features are soft, his lips slightly parted whenever he lets another word slip out of his mouth. Louis smiles and places a kiss on top of the curls, before he gets dressed. He writes a quick note, “where are you going?” Harry asks eyes dark when he stares at him. 

“Got t’ head home love.” Louis says, “me mum’ll kill me if she thinks I stayed out all night.” Louis brushes a few strayed curls out of his face and Harry mumbles a ‘see you later’ type thing.

Louis tries to be as quiet as possible when he descends the stairs. There’s a tiny lamp on, bathing the kitchen in a warm light. A man with blonde hair and a heavy beard is leaning against the counter waiting for the water to boil. “You’re just going to leave him in his cold bed all by himself?” Charlie, Gemma’s new boyfriend asks him. He turns to look at Louis. Louis finds that he reminds him of someone. 

“Ye knaw ye look like tha’ Green Street Hooligans actor, Peter… Peter Dunham.” Louis says. 

Charlie smiles, his cherub lips are lightly chopped, “suppose I do.” 

“I left a note,” Louis says.

Charlie nods, and opens the door for him, “Good. Now get out of here you little twink.”

Louis sobers up from the small walk back to his own home, and it’s surprisingly easy getting back into his room. He doesn't want to be a twink. Much less look like one. 

Curly  💚💛

Am I a twink?

Louis falls asleep long before he ever gets an answer. He wakes up from multiple insistent pings coming from his phone. He raises his burning eyes from where they are squished against his pillow and looks up. Louis grabs his glasses and his phone. 

sort of

my dad just drove home

Im coming over

Im here.

Wait I’ll let ye in

Louis walks down the staircase, pulling Harry’s Green Bay Packer’s hoodie over his head in an attempt to hide his blood shot eyes. He can hear two male voices speaking, and pulls the hood lower. He hopes it’s not Dan and Mark. He doesn’t want to walk into that awkward shit. His feet make small naked smacks when he tries to silently walk down the stairs.

“… it’s all I need him t’ knaw. Ye knaw? I’m still his dad.” Mark says to the person across from him.

“I’m sure he knows.” Louis quickens his steps down, when he realises it’s Harry’s deep voice. Louis steps around the corner into the kitchen. Both eyes fall on him.

“Hey, love.” Louis says to him.

“Lou,” Harry’s eyes scan him up and down, unimpressed. “Rough night?” 

“Yeah.” Louis says and looks up to stare at his dad. “Wha’ are ye talkin’ about, ye two?” 

“Just about my dad coming to Cheshire for Christmas, just like Mark, ever since the divorce.” Harry says and plays with the handle of his tea cup. 

“Fancy that.” Louis says.

“Yeah, fancy that.” Mark says and looks at Louis.

“I think it’s just right, wouldn’t be Christmas without my dad.” Harry says, giving Louis a pointed look. “He and Robin get on well.” 

“Right.” Louis says.

“Dan’s… he’s a good… doctor.” Mark says. He’s staring at the counter top. 

Harry hides a laugh behind a fake sneeze, and Louis rolls his eyes. “Come on, let’s get upstairs. Me bed is missin’ me.” 

“Looks like it too.” Mark says. He’s smile is slightly off and Louis can see him gauge at every reaction between his son and the curly haired boy.

Louis grabs Harry’s bicep to pull him off the stool. “It was nice meeting you Mr. Tomlinson.” 

“Likewise.” Mark nods at him.

“Harold.” Louis says, and Harry starts budging. 

“Louis!”

“What?” 

“I’m not sure what the rules are, but I doubt yer mother agrees to this.” Mark points from Harry to Louis. Louis swallows, _he knows then_. “Someone sleepin’ over in yer room.” 

“I won’t tell her, if ye don’t.” Louis says, lets his hand slip down Harry’s arm and tangles their fingers together. He tugs at his arm, and Harry gives Mark an apologetic smile. 

They are half up the stairs when Mark calls after them, “I’m still yer dad.” Louis stops and looks past Harry’s shoulder. He grabs his hand and moves up the stairs. Louis fits himself on to the window sill and lights the cigarette. “He doesn’t look like you… your dad I mean.” Harry says while he looks at the small note stuck above Louis’ worktable. It’s the ‘win Harry back’ list. Harry is smiling.

“I know.” Louis says. “You, though, you look like your dad.”

“Really?” Harry asks and turns around on his axes, eyes falling on the pencil drawing Zayn made of him. 

“But more like your mother.” Louis keeps rambling.

“Hm.” Harry hums facing Louis.

“All I’m saying is tha’ I can see both yer parents in yer face.” Louis says, breathing smoke through the slit of the open window.

“Yeah. I know.” Harry says and steps closer to Louis. “I think you look like Johanna.” Louis watches him for a moment, before he raises his bare knees against his chest. 

“Mark’s not my father.” Louis says and watches Harry’s smile fall from his lips. “He’s my dad, but not my biological father.”

“I didn’t know.” Harry says, his face is paler than usual.

“He left me mum when I was eight days old.” Louis sucks on the cigarette, “I don’t really look like him either. Thank God.”

“Oh.” Harry says. “Well good riddance, your mother did well without him. And shame on him for not realising what a gem of son he has.” 

Louis lets himself smile for a moment. Harry’s long fingers circle around one of Louis’ ankles. “I think his cowardess seeped into my blood.” Louis says.

Harry cocks his head, his princess curls falling over his shoulder, and he looks quizitive at him, “you’re not a coward.” His finger-pads circle his ankle.

Louis laughs non-humorously, “course I am, Hazza. The way I treated this,” he points between the two, “was cowardly. I am a coward.” 

“We all get cowardly when we figure out we’re gay, Louis. I tried so hard to ignore it, until it was impossible to. Because I wanted to be the real me, not hide the best parts of me. And you are facing the same dilemma. You are doing so well.”

“I almost believe it when it comes out of your mouth.” Louis says. The door swings open to reveal his mother. Jay is looking at Louis, smoking out of the window only wearing a green hoodie. One of his bare legs is dangling down next to Harry’ left thigh, not quite able to reach the floor. The other leg she can’t see since it’s still held by the ankle by Harry. Both boys look concentrated and their eyebrows create almost identically creases between their eyebrows. She thought she was interrupting them having sex, but this looks entirely like something else. 

“Breakfast is ready my love.” She says, looking at both of them, “there’s enough food for you too, Harry.”

“Thank you. Jay.” Harry says, bringing back his kindest smile.

“Did I interrupt something?” Jay asks carefully.

“Nope.” “Yes” They say at the same time.

Worry spreads through Jay again, “are you two fighting?” 

“No.” Both agree together.

“Well good. Do come down. Yer sisters want to say happy new years to you.” Jay says trying to sound as scolding as possible. Louis finds some pants before the two walk down the stairs and have breakfast with the family. 

After breakfast, Louis drives Harry home. It’s only a short walk, but Louis is trying his hardest to be a good boyfriend. “When’s your dad going back to Doncaster?” Harry asks, when Louis stops the car on his driveway. He can see Robin, Harry’s step-father, looking through the living room window. 

“Today I think.” Louis says, staring at his hands holding on to the steering wheel. Harry’s hand fills his view before he feels the warmth of the inside of his hand cover his.

“You should tell him that you love him.” Harry says and leaves a wet kiss on his cheek. “See you at school.”

“Want me t’ drive ye?” Louis asks.

“If you think it’s a good idea.” Harry says, blushing around the nose.

“We’ll just take Niall with us too. You’ll probably find a way to bribe him.” Louis says winking at the taller boy. 

“I’ll try my worst.” Harry giggles. “You look hot in glasses by the way. Bye darling.” 

“Bye, love.” Louis says, and the door closes with a loud thud. He watches Harry walk to the main door and fish out a pair of keys. It’s the closest they have ever got to say love, Louis thinks.

He drives back home and sees his dad packing up the rest of his things. His sisters are all lined up and waiting on the front steps. Louis rushes over and falls into his arms. “I love ye, dad.” Louis whispers into his neck.

“I love ye too, son.” Mark whispers, his voice breaks a little.

💚🍑💙

The first three weeks of school pass in a blur. Every morning Louis drags himself out of bed early, to pick up Harry. His boyfriend hands him a pre-prepared tea and a wet kiss to the cheek. Then they pick up Niall at a street-corner, and Louis pouts every time he smells the delicious food delivered to Niall as part of his bribe. 

On his first day back his maths teacher had introduced the class with a good-natured scolding. “Welcome back everyone I hope you all enjoyed your last days of freedom!” She had said and banged the heavy books on top of her table. “These are the last six months of your college career, so if you haven’t already worked off your ass, you will start now! Tell all your boyfriends and girlfriends to learn quick hand jobs, because you won’t have time for anything else.” Jade had giggled next to him. “Anything you’d like to add Ms. Thrillwall?” 

Jade swallowed next to her, “just that boys need more practice in it than girls, mam.” Louis scoffed, and the girls in the class giggled.

“Thank you, Ms Thrillwall. I sincerely hope this was your last dumb comment, and we can enjoy the rest of our 6 months without them.” Since then Jade and Louis had stopped playing games during class. Their only game became their math-work, which was much less exciting than it sounded. But Louis had always been competitive. His mother seemed to like the new raising grades.

He started going back to footie practice, though the turf was mostly frozen which was meant to teach them for the next match. After matches, he found himself soaking in bath water, where Harry usually finds him. They spend the day lounging on Louis’ bed, toppled over each other, always touching, quizzing each other on some homework. Sometimes they play video games with Louis feet in Harry’s lap or drive across town, finding new spots to huddle up together listening to music and making out. 

Louis favourite day of the week is Sunday. He wakes up late, and after a hot shower, he runs over to Harry’s house. He climbs up to his room, where he waits for him between his sheets. When Harry comes home, he usually brings Louis a sweet breakfast muffin. Louis snuggles the bridge of his nose against his nape and breathes in the bread smell. And then Louis spends a few hours to take Harry apart.

It’s snowing when the match starts. Louis’ thighs feel like two ice pecks, and he’s more appreciative of the long-sleeve and tights he borrowed from Lottie to wear under his jersey. Everyone slips at least twice, and Louis almost breaks his wrist when he tries to soften his fall with his hand behind him. He rotates it a couple of times, but it’s nothing compared to the fall Niall takes. In the seventy-second minute of the game, Niall collides with the goalkeeper of the other team. There is a small squeal coming from the boy, Liam and Louis rush to his side. Niall is holding on to his knee, eyes filled with water. Louis stands to his feet and makes a motion with his hand to inform the coach they need to get Niall of the pitch. Louis and Liam pull him up and carry him to the edge of the pitch, where Niall’s dad is waiting with Harry to take him to the hospital. The team does not recover from the incident, and they lose. 

Liam and Zayn sit down in Louis’ car, while he starts the engine. “Harry just texted, they are back at Niall’s.” 

“Good. Tha’s where we ‘ave t’ go.” Louis says. 

“Did he say something about his knee?” Zayn asks.

“No,” Liam sighs. Louis nods, and feels the sweat clamming up his hands around the wheel. 

“The fuck do we do when he ain’t goin’ t’ play the next few games?” Louis asks.

“Breathe Louis.” Liam says, patting his shoulder. Louis didn’t like being told to breathe, after all he was the captain. And if the team lost the next game, they’d lose the entire championship under  his captaincy. 

“The fuck do I do then?” Louis mumbles to himself.

“Pardon?” Zayn asks from the back.

“We’re here.” Louis says instead and parks on the curb outside the Horan house. He shuts off the engine and the three walk over to the door. Niall’s father opens it for them and with a hanging head tells them to go up to Niall’s room. Louis remembers the New Years party where he found Zayn and Liam in the room they just past. He shakes his head and jogs up the stairs. “Oi, Oi NIALL!” Louis screams when he pops into the room. 

Harry looks up, he’s sitting on Niall’s bed with him, stuffing his face with food. Curiously Niall is not. “How bad is it?” Liam asks.

“7 Weeks out of commission boys.” Niall says.

“Fuck.” Louis says and falls down the edge of the bed. 

“Louis.” Liam scolds him.

“Wha’?” Louis asks oblivious to Niall’s pained face.

“Wanker.” Harry says, although fondly. 

“That’ll be… what?… March?” Liam asks and sits down at the desk. Zayn leans against the wall next to the open door and winks at Liam. 

“Yeah, I’m really sorry lads.” Niall whines, and Louis realises for the first time since he has known Niall, he is sad. 

“It’ll be fine, mate.” Louis says, patting his foot. Niall winces. “We’re going t’ knock them out next time, yeah? Ye’ll be there for the next few games.” Niall winces again. Louis feels Harry’s large hands grasp his. 

“I think that’s hurt.” Harry says, giggling. 

“Oops, sorry.” Louis says.

“Gross,” Niall pretend pukes. “Stop the love-making.” Louis feels himself grow hot all over. There’s that word again: love.

“We’re not.” Harry says and punches his chest. 

“God, I hate couples.” Niall coughs. 

Zayn chuckles behind them, “yeah no kidding.” 

Harry rolls his eyes, “so since we are all here, what are we going to do on my birthday?” He asks like a child before Christmas. Louis freezes. _Birthday. Shit. How is it possible I forgot Again!_ For a moment he has a flashback to Harry’s birthday last night. His eyes flash on Harry, where the silver bracelet is back around his wrist. 

“Wha’ do ye feel like love?” Louis asks him, his mind running through about a thousand scenarios. 

“Well…” Harry says, rolling his eyes up to the sky to thin, “it’s a Saturday, and I’m taking the Sunday off. Any suggestions?” 

“Wait!” Niall interrupts whatever Louis was going to say. 

“Yeah… eh… Niall and I we got the day covered.” Liam says, grinning proudly. Louis clenches his fist. _Why didn’t they include me?_

“Yay.” Harry smiles brightly. “Great. Lou?” 

“I guess we can spend the afternoon together?” Louis says and sounds to sad for his own liking.

“No, no, no.” Niall shakes his blonde head. “Mate, we got something going for ALL of us.” Niall points around the room. _Great, have to spend me boyfriend’s birthday with Zayn_. Louis grumbles to himself. “You and Hazza can do something at night.” 

“I’m sure my family doesn’t mind you joining us for dinner and staying the night.” Harry says hopeful. Louis smiles at him.

“Mind telling me why ye asked me to come along?” Fizzy asks while she holds up a pair of lacy knickers. 

“ ‘Cause ye knaw about all this, don’t ye? Best style I knaw.” Louis smiles at her and accidentally brushes past the bras which litter to the floor. 

“I ‘appen to think Lottie has the best style in the family. Curious ye’re so embarrassed around Lottie with this stuff.” Fizzy says, bending down to pick up some bras. Louis face is horribly red when he sees himself in the small mirror against the wall. 

“Shut up.” Louis whines. “Help me, please.” 

“Oh wow.” Fizzy says while she takes in her brother’s embarrassment. “Fine. So ye want t’ buy yer boyfriend some nice knickers for his birthday.” 

“Yeah.” Louis nods, looking around himself. There are too many options in his opinion. “Niall and Liam are getting him tickets for ManU against Stoke City. I got t’ compete with like the best present ever!” 

“Sure.” Fizzy chuckles. “Alright, so I suppose ye have to like the knickers too. So why don’t ye look around what you like. Ye’re the one who has to get it up.”

“Trust me, no problem in tha’ area, no matter wha’ he’s wearin’.” Louis says, and this time it’s Fizzy who wants to hide under a large pile of knickers.

“Too much information. Now what do ye like?” Fizzy says. Louis starts walking in slalom around the small store. He grabs a few very pretty looking knickers, hopefully picking the right size, which Gemma had found out for him. 

“Looks like ye found something.” Fizzy says, but she’s holding something else up too. A bra. “It’s the smallest cup-size, the largest band around it, so it will fit him. It also happens to be Parisian style if ye care.” She says wiggling it toward him.

“Ye want me t’ get him a bra?” Louis asks, eyes wide.

“It’s all good fun innit?” Fizzy asks. “Look, if Harry likes wearing knickers than he will want to try wearing this, even if he only does it once. It’ll be a great experience for the both of ye.” Louis raises his eyebrow in disbelief. “Plus, he’ll always know ye like him no matter what. Ye support his weirdness, alright?” 

“I’m sayin’ all tha’ with a bra?” Louis asks, swallowing around the lump in his throat.

“Ye’re so daft.” Fizzy rolls her eyes. “Fine, don’t….” She says turning, but shuts up when Louis snatches it out of her hands. 

“Hi, you buying for a specific reason?” A nice-looking blue-haired employee looks at him.

“Oh hi. I… eh… I’m lookin’ for something for me… girlfriend.” Louis says, and Fizzy gives him a look. 

“Alright, what does she like?” Blue-haired girl asks. 

“Lace, I think.” Louis says. “She… doesn’t really ‘ave anything nice, and I wanted t’ do her a favour.” Louis stumbles.

“That sounds nice.” Blue compliments. “Favoured colour?” 

“Eh…” Louis heats up furiously. “My eye-colour, it’s a baby blue colour.” Fizzy giggles next to him and Louis tries to shove her.

“We have some really nice things over here.” The girl shoves them into an isle Louis hasn’t seen before. He gets stuck on a very nice pair of blue panties with one white ribbon just below the navel. “Ah, yes, it’s a favourite.” The girl compliments, “I suppose you want it with the bra?” Louis only nods dumbly. “What size does she have?” 

“M for the knickers.” Louis says, “and the bra is I think … I…. The smallest size I suppose.”

“So an A?” The girl asks.

“No,” Fizzy interjects. “She got chicken breast. Like smaller than A.”

Louis kicks her, “what’s smaller than an A? Maybe a small a.”

Fizzy chuckles, “yeah, like the smallest of the small… could be a man.” Blue haired girl blinks at them.

“Aren’t you dating Eleanor Calder?” The girl from the till asks, while she pops her bubblegum. “She’s definitely not an AA, which is what it’s called by the way.”

“I used to. New relationship.” Louis says. 

“Your girlfriend is a very lucky girl.” The woman says, and Louis just mumbles a thank you. Louis pays for the lingerie and has the till-girl wrap it up. He watches her while she chomps down on her chewing gum. 

“You’re very anal about this whole coming out thing.” Fizzy tells him, while the two start strolling back to Louis’ car. 

All Louis says is “bad pun.”

“No one will care.” Fizzy says.

“Gee thanks.” Louis rolls his eyes. 

Fizzy rolls her eyes in turn, “the people who matter won’t care.” Louis nods and shoves the girl who is getting too tall for him.

“I knaw tha’. Just want t’ wait till after school, ye knaw? Be free at uni.” Louis says.

Fizzy opens the car door and sits down in the passenger seat. “Sure.”

“Besides, mum is making me explain it to the girls.” Louis moans and Fizzy barks a laugh. “Shut up, I’ve been trying to figure out how to explain it to them forever. It’s soooo hard.” Louis whines. 

“They’re just our annoying twins.” Fizzy grins.

“Still, want them to understand properly.” Louis says, hitting the steering wheel. “Beside if I don’t figure it out soon, mum won’t let me sleep over at Harry’s for his birthday.”

“Poor Boo Bear. All that lingerie for nothing.” Fizzy pouts at him. Louis reaches out and punches her against her shoulder, hard.

Louis rubs his hands against each other, “okay, so I want t’ talk about love.”

“Is this a story?” Pheebs asks, her little legs wiggling above the floor. 

“Yes. No. Ah, fuck.” Louis says.

“Ye’re not supposed to say that!” Daisy grins, and slurps on her hot chocolate Louis made her for this talk. 

“So ye knaw how in all mum’s fairy tales the princess falls in love with the prince?” Louis asks them and they both nod. “Well, sometimes…” Louis takes a deep breath. “Sometimes the prince falls in love with another prince.” 

“Okay.” Daisy says. 

“So ‘ave I.” Louis says. “I found me prince.” 

“But ye’re no prince.” Daisy says, cruelly Louis liked to add. 

He rolls his eyes, “remember Harry?” 

“How can we forget him?” The girls say in unison. 

“Well Harry’s a prince right? With all his little curls.” Louis says. 

“It’s not just that, though.” Daisy says, she picks up her sisters hand and starts counting from her fingers, “he’s nice. He’s handsome. He’s courageous. He’s a gentleman.” Louis chuckles. 

“Well sometimes the prince falls in love with the help.” Louis says. The girls cock their heads and they both look as confused as ever. “I’m the help.” Louis clarifies. 

“OH!” They both giggle.

Louis huffs his air annoyed, “Harry and I were together.” 

“Wicked.” Daisy grins.

“Ye knaw like mum and Dan. Or Sallie and dad. Anne and Robin.” Louis keeps talking. 

“I like Harry. He’s nice.” Phoebe supplies a very helpful comment. Louis smiles at her.

“Yeah, so do I. So do ye ‘ave any questions, loveys?” The girls shake their heads. Louis nods, “But sometimes dark witches come along and snatch the princes away from each other, so ye can’t tell anyone. Not a soul outside this house, yeah?” The girls nod, shock written all over their faces.

“Why would someone do tha’?” Pheebs asks.

“Because they don’t understand.” Louis says. “They don’t understand tha’ no one chooses who we fall for. It’s our bodies tha’ do the hard part.” 

“So I could fall for a girl too?” Daisy asks.

“Yes, and tha’ would be alright.” Louis smiles. “And when we’re all older, the bad witches can’t hurt us no more, yeah? ‘Cause the older we get the better we can defend ourselves.” The girls nod. 

“Tha’ was sweet.” Jay says, sitting up from where she could see them on the couch. “I see ye told them?”

“Yes.” Louis says.

“I want t’ learn karate.” Daisy says, turning around to her mother.

“Excuse me?” Jay chuckles. 

“When the bad witch comes, I want to kick her in her privates.” Daisy says, ramming a clenched fist on the counter top. Jay raises an eyebrow at Louis who hides his chuckles behind his hand. 

“Fine then. Nothin’ wrong with a girl defending herself. Could all benefit from it. Maybe I’ll force all the girls to do it.” Jay says, lying back down, rubbing the baby. Louis walks around to her to stare down at her.

“Including the one in there?” Louis asks pointing at her belly.

“Yes, of course.” Jay says rubbing her belly. They found out a few days ago they were expecting another girl. Louis had been just the tiniest bid frustrated. _What’s with all the girls?_ He’s got used to them outnumbering him, but it would be nice just to have one more weight against them. “If I lie down, do you think I have less wrinkles?” She asks thoughtfully. 

“Ye’re beautiful, mum.” Louis says. “Ye don’t ‘ave any wrinkles.

“I should meet people lying down.” Jay says. Louis laughs, and takes her hand. 

“Most beautiful woman in the world, no matter what anyone says. Babies make ye ‘ave less wrinkles.” 

“Oh boo bear.” Jay says and flicks away a few tears. “Sorry…’

“… hormones.” Louis concludes, laughing. She giggles through her tears. He places a hand on her tummy, trying to soothe the babies. A pressure attaches to his palm. He’s felt it before. 

Louis opens his mouth wide, “Oh my God mum, they’re kicking!” She smiles at him. 

“I feel it too. Girls come here! Ye do want to feel a kick, right?” Jay asks, and six hands find spots on her belly. “Ye said they?” Jay says, eyebrows clenched.

“Yeah… isn’t tha’ the word for non-binary?” Louis asks.

“We already know it’s a girl.” Jay says, redirecting Phoebe’s curious hand to the baby’s foot. 

“We also thought Fizzy was a boy until she popped out a girl.” Louis says, making his mother laugh.

💚🍑💙

Harry’s birthday starts off with rain. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.” Harry squeals when Louis calls him in the morning. He had left his gift in the caring hands of Anne. 

“Welcome love. Ye like it then, all of it?” Louis asks. 

“Yes.” Harry says. Louis just knows he’s chewing on his bottom lip. 

“Can’t wait t’ see ye in it tonight. All of it.” Louis says.

“You really mean it?” Harry asks tentative.

“Hell yeah, babe. See ye then.” He makes a kiss sound and hangs up. 

Louis picks up Niall, Liam and Zayn with his car, and together they drive to Harry’s house to give him the tickets. When they arrive, Harry is still in his tracks. Apparently, Gemma made him breakfast in bed. And he hasn’t left it except to receive his presents. He looks a little ashamed of this when he opens the door for the others. He gives Louis a quick kiss, who feels his cheeks heat up again when he sees Anne look at them. 

Harry squeals like a little girl when he finds the ticket. He hangs himself around Niall’s neck and presses a loud kiss against his cheek. Niall wavers on his crutches. “Shit sorry.” Harry giggles.

“Everyone ready?” Des asks, who was in on the whole play. He was going to drive them to and back.

The rain stops when they drive to the stadium, and the sun decides to peak through. “Yes!” Harry screams from the passenger side of his father’s car. “We are so ready! Even the sun is asking for our presence.” 

“Weirdo,” Zayn chuckles next to him. Louis rams his elbow into his ribs. “Ow,” Zayn complains and Louis grins. The sun gets covered again by some heavy clouds, but the rain doesn’t show up again. Des parks and lets the boys make their way into the stadium. Since the boys bought all the tickets, Louis offered to pay for the beverages. 

“ID please.” The woman says, she’s covered in grease and Louis already feared she dripped into their chips. 

“19, love.” Louis says, holding up his ID to her face.

“What about him?” She points to Liam, who has to carry all the pints. 

“They’re all for me, darling. I’m looking out for the children today.” Louis says. 

Liam rolls his eyes, “I’m 18.” Louis chuckles, when the woman just shrugs and gives them the rest of their order.

“How in the hell are ye payin’ for all of this?” Louis asks, while they make their way to their seats, where the other three are already waiting. 

“Harry’s dad and step-dad gave us some extra peas. They had planned something similar and when we came to them, so they would block his day they gave us some money. That’s why we didn’t tell you sooner. We thought you’d blabber to him.” Liam says.

“I don’t blabber.” Louis says and sits down next to Harry. He beams at him when Louis gives him a beer and the chips they share. Liam doesn’t respond as he gets preoccupied by Zayn begging for attention. “Hey, love.” 

“I like when you call me that, darling.” Harry says.

“Ye wearin’ it?” Louis asks, looking down at him. Harry blushes, and nods. He looks around like he’s worried people could read what he is wearing underneath his clothes. “All of it?” Louis asks. Curiosity was getting the better of him. _Is he wearing it or not?_

“Yes.” Harry says, peaking at him from underneath some curls. “Is that okay?” 

“Would I ‘ave bought ye this if I wasn’t okay with it?” Louis asks. Harry shakes his head, a stray tear in his eye. “None of tha’, baby.” He rubs Harry’s skin right underneath his eye.

“It’s just… I’ve been waiting so long for someone to understand me. Like really get me. And accept me for it. And you do. You just do.” Harry says, linking their fingers together.

“I get ye, baby. And if ye want t’ explore I’m with ye.” He squeezes Harry’s hand. 

“It’s starting boys!” Niall screams next to Harry. The first goal is 30-yard shot cannoning off one player and looping into the opposite corner of the goal. Louis grumbles into his beer, while Niall is standing unsteady on his feet screaming “off-side! OFF SIDE!” He takes his seat again when the ball is placed back on the kick-off line.

The wind picks up fiercely and blows the player against each other, the ball has a much faster velocity and lands wrong most of the time. Happily, Louis watched as the Stoke’s have problems showing up and preforming like a team, giving Manchester better options. Manchester United lines up their four best players, giving them the best shot yet at the goal. In the 47th minute, 2 minutes after half time, van Persie tips the ball during a penalty on the post and attacks again kicking it in goal. All five friends shoot up to cheer the goal. Louis gives Harry a quick peck on the lips, before the game continues. But Adam quickly restored Stoke's lead in spectacular style with a fierce 25-yard strike into the top corner.

Sadly, the game ends with a 2-1. 

“Sorry they lost, honey.” Anne says when they are back at Harry’s house. 

Harry shrugs, “still loved it.” 

“Phew.” Louis says and pretends to wipe the sweat off of his forehead. Anne smiles at him. “Ye’re not cooking, mate?” Louis asks Des jokingly who was setting the table.

“I promised him I’d never cook again.” Des says, poking his son into his dimple when he passes him. Harry giggles.

“He’s horrible at it.” Harry says, and Gemma scolds him for moving. She’s busy colouring his nails. 

“There.” Gemma says, “they will match your present.” Louis grins down at the pink and blue fingernails. 

“Dinner’s ready.” Robin calls, and carries the warm food over to the table. “I hope you’ll all enjoy this.” 

“Yeah, ‘cause you worked so hard on that.” Gemma giggles.

“Hey, he warmed it up!” Louis defends Robin with a wink. Robin bows to him with a grin on the lips. Harry directs Louis to sit next to him. Robin had ordered a few different foods from Harry’s favourite restaurant. He had warmed it up, so they could eat it with Harry’s immediate family.

When Louis had finished eating and placed the fork and knife back on his plate, he bulged into a story of his past. “I stole me mum’s car when I was fourteen. Wanted to impress this bird, her boyfriend had a car, so I needed one too. Broke off both side mirrors.” Louis tells his story, charming all his new in-laws. Harry chuckles right along with them, ears red from the giggling he was doing. He looked up, and Louis winks at his baby. He can’t stop thinking of the lace presses against the t-shirt from time to time, pacing a pattern across his chest. Louis thinks about the sensitive numbs rubbing against the material. His dick twitches in his pants when he thinks about wetting his nipples with his mouth. From time to time he has to shift on the chair in order to release some pressure. 

Harry licks his lips, and Louis can’t help but follow the movement with his eyes. _Fuck, I need t’ get the boy to bed quick._ Gemma raises an eyebrow across from him as if she knows exactly what he was thinking. “I’m glad my boy picked someone that makes him laugh.” Des says, and Louis’ eyes quickly find Des.

“I’m glad he picked me too.” Louis smiles. Harry squeezes his knee underneath the table.

“Pick you every time.” Harry mumbles. His hand rubs upward, along the seem of Louis’ pants. He coughs into his hand, he doesn’t fancy spurting a boner when he helps clear the table later. Louis finds Harry’s hand and makes it stop. It lies hot on his inner thigh. He can feel his cock pulsate against his sipper. 

“Well, you two can go up if you want.” Anne says with a smile.

“Nonsense.” Louis interjects, Harry’s fingertips dig into his meaty flesh. “I can help clear up.” 

“Oh, you don’t have to.” Anne tries to say, when she stands up to start clearing the table. Des’ new partner, a red-haired lithe woman, gets up to do the same. Louis will have none of it and quickly helps the ladies clear up. Harry is physically held down by Des and Robin by his shoulders, so he won’t do the same. 

“17 years.” Des toasts with Robin and Harry to Harry’s age. The adults take two very small sips from the golden liquid inside the tiny glass. Harry gulps down too much and ends up coughing its content back on the table. 

“Still young at heart.” Robin chuckles. 

“Such a beginner,” Gemma whispers, not so silently, into Harry’s ear. When she walks back towards the kitchen Louis trips her. She swaggers, and Louis elegantly holds out his hands to grab the content she was holding before she crashes to the floor. Louis pokes out his tongue at her, and she understands the implication and kicks him against the shin when she’s back on her feet. 

“Oh Gemma, dear, are you alright?” Des’ new partner asks worried. 

“I’m fine, Louis won’t be.” Gemma warns. Louis just grins. 

“Well, off you go. Go on. Enjoy the rest of your night.” Anne says kissing her son on the cheek. “My big boy.” She says like any mother does on a birthday, with tears in her eyes and a happy smile. Harry curls around her in a hug. 

“Love you, mummy.” Harry says.

“I love you too. No matter what, you’ll always be my baby.” She says, cradling his cheek. Harry bends forward and kisses her on her cheekbone. 

“Go on.” She says spreading her tears in a thin line over her entire cheek with her hand. “Have fun.” 

“Not too much fun!” Des warns loudly, when Harry is already shoving Louis up the stairs. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” Louis calls back, “Jesus, Haz.” He complains when Harry literally pushes him up the stairs by pushing his body into his bum.

“I need you to walk in front of me, so I can see your ass.” He says, and Louis has to adjust himself in his pants again. Harry hungrily watches the movement. 

“Show me.” Is the first thing Louis says, when Harry closes the door behind them. “I want t’ see it on ye.” 

“You really think it’s hot?” Harry asks. 

“Oh baby.” Louis says, he grabs Harry’s hand and presses it against his groin. “It’s all I could think of during dinner. Yer little bra,” Louis says and traces the bra underneath his shirt, “was showing. We’re ye showing off for me, baby?” Harry nods, curls bouncing. “Do ye feel good in them? Sexy?” Harry nods again, and Louis can feel both their hearts racing.

“I want to look pretty for you.” Harry gets out, face hot and lips bitten raw. Louis has to take a deep breath. Harry’s hand massages his cock slowly.

“Undress, princess.” Louis says sternly. He can feel himself try and regain his composure. Harry steps back a bit and undoes the button. Slowly his tight pants shift off of his legs. They are as tight as glue and Louis falls to his knees to pull them further down. He holds the material to the floor and with a whiplash Harry’s leg catapult out of the pant legs. Louis looks up, but is faced with a very hard cock inside some lace. Louis presses his nose into his groin and breathes in Harry’s most memorable sent. He licks a fat stripe upward, and Harry moans. 

Louis smiles, leaning backwards and attaches his fingers to Harry’s love handles. He turns him, so he can look at his bum. The knickers press into the rounds of Harry’s bum, making it look bigger, more like two large globes stuck against each other. The baby blue and white looks prefect against the pearls of his skin. Louis kisses each individual cheek. “So precious, darling. Fock just the sight of ye is goin’ t’ make me wanna come.” Louis says, mouthing at the small indent where the knickers press into his cheek.

Louis looks back up, just as his tongue finds itself trapped underneath the lace. Harry’s eyes are large and innocent when he looks down at him in awe. Louis smiles at him, and rubs the inside of his hand up his left leg, slowly exploring the tight muscle on him. He releases his tongue from its confinement and bites him.

Harry jumps and giggles, which is replaced by a moan, when Louis’ hand finally finds the lace and roughly rubs his hand on his cock. Louis sucks in a piece of his flesh when Harry starts cocking his hips forward in an attempt to rub himself harder. Louis retracts the hand, “be a good boy and stop.” Harry blushes but tries to nod anyway. 

Harry doesn’t dare move when Louis starts rubbing him over the irritating lace. Louis slowly stands, kissing his way up his leg and tattooed arm to reach his ear which he kisses. “Louis,” Harry whines. Louis keeps teasing him, staring him right in the eye. He licks his hand, and it runs underneath Harry’s shirt. He stops rubbing the taller boy, just holds the twitching cock in his grasp. Louis’ hand keeps edging upward until he feels the beginning of his bra. 

“Harry,” Louis says, stopping his hand to pull him against himself. He gives him a deep kiss, “may I see you, my love?” He whispers against the wet lips. 

“Yes.” Harry says and grabs the hem of his shirt to reveal the pale skin underneath. Louis takes his hand off of Harry’s body to lift the shirt over his head. Louis looks down at him, hands resting on his ribcage. 

“Fuck.” Is all Louis gets out, when he stares at the lacy bra covering Harry’s trained pecks. _Fuck Liam Payne and his work-out routines._ Louis thinks to himself, when he sees how hard Harry’s body must have worked to gain the new muscle underneath his pale skin. He almost has pecks from the weights he pushes every week. “You fill this out so nicely baby.” He huffs out.

Harry’s breath spreads over his face, “want to suck you.” Louis moans and presses Harry down by his shoulders. Louis looks down at the kneeling boy. He grabs his belt and unbuckles it, ripping it out of his jeans and throwing it on the bed. Harry’s greens never leave Louis’ blues. Feeling transported into a world only created of lust and flame, Louis rips his pants off of his body. Meanwhile, Harry waits for him. His dainty hands are waiting in his lap, while he kneels in front of Louis. Completely naked Louis steps back into the spot he was occupying earlier. His cock stands hard against his stomach. He lets his finger craze through Harry’s curls. 

“Such a good boy.” Louis praises him, and Harry closes his eyes in an attempt to bury the moan escaping him. Louis gently massages Harry’s scalp. Harry’s dilated eyes snap open. “Fill yer mouth,” Louis orders. Harry leans forward, hands clasped behind his back, his tongue finds the head of his cock, and he circles his tongue around his foreskin. “Fuck, so good already.” Harry swallows the tip. He uses his tongue to pry the foreskin from his cock head, his tongue slips into the space between it. Vigorously Harry rotates his tongue around his head. Louis throws his head back and moans loudly. He can’t even bother about Harry’s family, _it feels so bloody goo-ood!_ “Use yer hands, boy.” Louis says. Harry’s warm hands immediately surge forward to roll his balls and gradually picks up speed on his shaft with his other hand. Gently, Harry grabs Louis’ foreskin with his teeth and pulls it over his cock, stretching the skin as good as it goes. “Fuck fuck fuck, Harry.” Louis moans and a hand holds him at his base, so he won’t come yet. 

Harry blinks up at him innocently, before he lets the foreskin snap back. “I want you to come all over me.”

“What about yer pretty lace?” Louis groans, toes curling on the carpet.

“Mum can wash it.” Harry shrugs. Louis can see his hand press into his groin, trying to relieve the pressure. 

“Alright,” Louis groans and swallows hard. “Stop what yer doin’.” Louis says, and he can clearly see Harry’s confusion. “On the bed.” Harry stands up so quickly he’s a bit dizzy and has to rely on Louis pushing him to the bed. “On yer back, baby.” Louis straddles Harry’s torso and fiddles with his bra. His hands push the two pecks together, so the bra bunches up in the middle. Louis’ thumbs brush underneath the fabric and flicker Harry’s sensitive nipples. Harry’s hips push into the air. “Careful love.” Louis giggles and bends down to give Harry another wet kiss. 

“Feels so good.” Harry says, head lulling from side to side. Louis only smiles, before he moves his hips, pushing the material together again and slipping his cock underneath the fabric against Harry skin. Slowly he pushes the pecks together, so he can rub his cock against the alcove they build. Harry looks down at himself, eyes wide, lips wet.

“Looks so good.” Louis moans while he starts to fuck Harry’s pecks. 

“Yeah it does.” Harry says, hands grabbing Louis’ thighs. Finally, getting what he wants, Louis moans when he starts going faster. 

“Such a pretty princess.” Louis moans when he leans down to puff air against Harry’s lips. Harry tries to sit up on his elbows and attaches their lips together. “Goin’ t’ come.” Louis warns. 

“Please,” Harry says, he looks stunned and raw. Louis fucks his chest harder, until his cock head gets stuck on his nipple and the added friction makes Louis’ balls pull together. He comes all over Harry. Some of it lands on Harry’s chin, and he eagerly licks at his own chin. 

“Fuck,” Louis whispers against his lips and gives him a peck. He pulls his cock out of the bra. His hand rubs the come from his chest down to his belly and to his bulge, which is still pulsing lively. “God, baby. Such a good boy waiting for me approval.” 

“Hng… may I come?” Harry moans. Louis shakes his head and goes down his long body. Straddling Harry’s legs this time, he retrieves his cock and balls out of the knickers and kisses Harry along the pulsing vein on the underside of his cock. He pushes Harry’s foreskin out of the way and a few small pearls of pre-come drop down on the back of his hand. Louis leans down to lock it.

“Ye may come any time ye want.” Louis says and starts moving his hand over his cock. Harry’s foreskin does most of the job for him, brushing Harry at just the right amount of pressure over his cock head. Harry’s hips snap forward every few seconds, fucking himself into Louis’ hand. “Good boy.” Louis repeats. Harry’s lips drop open and his six-pack goes hard. White streaks spurt out of Harry’s cock and into his hand. “So good.” Louis repeats and keeps touching Harry’s cock.

“Thank you.” Harry says out of breath.

“My beautiful boy.” Louis says, while he lies down next to him. He litters Harry’s face with kisses, while stays there, trying to breathe. “Harry, ye’re worryin’ me. Are ye okay?” Louis asks.

“Yes.” Harry says weakly. His body twitches. 

“What was tha’? Louis asks, getting more worried by every minute. Harry was more out of it than he realised.

“Tremors. They’re like small aftershocks.” Harry says, finally opening his eyes to look Louis. “It was just that good.” Louis giggles and leans down to kiss Harry’s soft skin. 

“Want me to help ye get undressed?” Louis asks. Harry nods, and Louis lets him calm down while he helps him out of the bra and knickers. He walks into the dark hallway and retrieves a wet cloth. Someone opens the door and Louis runs back into Harry’s room. “I think someone saw me.” 

Harry looks up, he looks much better and his cock has finally deflated too. “Don’t matter.” He says, “they already know you’re fit.” 

“Have ye been talkin’ about me, young Harold?” Louis tsks. He starts rubbing down Harry and himself. 

“I have plenty to boast about with you.” Harry grins. Louis flings the wet cloth across the room and it lands in a heavy puddle next to the door. 

“Thank you baby.” He curls himself into Harry’s side and throws the blankets over them. “Good night princess and Happy Birthday Hazza.” He gives him a last kiss and dips his nose into Harry’s armpit where he falls asleep to Harry’s sharp smell.

💚🍑💙

A few days after Harry’s birthday, Louis is told there will be a week off of school after Valentine’s Day. It is usually used by students and parents for a ski trip. Louis goes back to look into the tiny box inside his table. He counts his money and looks up lodges he could go to. He brings it up on the Sunday which follows. 

He steps into the tiny bakery, “Oi, Oi.” He sees Barbara and Karen’s heads snap up and both smile at him. 

“It’s the cute one Harry has a crush on.” Barbara unhelpfully supplies. Karen walks around the counter and pinches Harry’s bum when she passes him.

“Louis!” Harry says. His eyes sparkle. “Can I get you something?” 

“Yes, please. Carrot cake for every one of me sisters. And anything ye want.” Louis says and grabs his wallet out of his back pocket. “Ye girls want anything?” He asks the older ladies.

“He called us girls again. You hear that?” Karen giggles, while she pinches Harry bum again. He squeals but smiles brightly. 

“Tha’s a no I suppose.” Louis mumbles to himself and walks towards Harry. “Red looks good on ye.” Harry looks down at his apron. 

“Cheers.” Harry says. 

“When ye off?” Louis asks. 

“NOW!” Barbara interrupts them. “Go on Harry, go home with the cute boy.” 

Louis chuckles and winks at her, “I happen t’ agree with her.” Harry smiles and closes the small packet which holds the cakes. 

“Bill him. I’ll change real quick.” Harry says and disappears somewhere inside the bakery.

Louis waits in the car until a whiff of bread spreads inside his car. Harry smiles at him when he buckles in. “Good day at work?” Louis asks as he pulls out of the small parking spot. He already had to fight off some housewives who tried to honk him out of it.

“Yeah, was good. Got a two dollar tip.” Harry giggles. 

Louis raises an eyebrow unimpressed, “seriously?” 

“Hey.” Harry punches him against his shoulder. “I don’t work at a fancy Fish and Chips store where drunkards throw bills in my face.” 

“Sorry, love.” Louis smiles. “Speaking of money, I was thinkin’ with the upcoming week off, maybe we could go skiing together. Ye do ski right?” 

“Oh yes. I ski since I’m five. Never really made it on a snowboard, though. Figured the bruised bum wasn’t worth it.” Harry says, while he scrubs some bread crumbs from under his fingernails.

“Sore bum?” Louis asks who never had the luxury of learning snowboard. By the time he became ‘too cool’ for skis, his family expanded so far, they ran out of money, and they stopped going skiing all together. 

“Yeah, I had a talent for falling on my bum.” Harry says. “They say it happens a lot when you are learning. I just got tired of it.” 

“Sure.” Louis says, unsure if he really understands his point. “How about it then, Harold? First holiday together or not?” 

“I’d love to.” Harry says, but Louis can hear the hesitance in his voice. 

“But…?” 

“My mum won’t say yes, Lou. Not when it’s just the two of us. She kind of freaked after you stayed over. She found the knickers and got scared. I had to go through another sex talk.” Harry says, ears turning redder the more he talks.

“Yeah, me too. Me mum gave me condoms.” Louis says, and Harry laughs.

“Condoms? Really?” Harry giggles. “Maybe I should ask mine to get us lube.” 

“Don’t worry, me mum covered tha’ too.” Louis giggles. “Tha’ sort of brings me t’ another topic.” 

“Alright?” Harry asks. He starts playing with a ring on his finger again.

“Ye knaw we ‘aven’t had the… proper sex. I thought we could try… there. Might be easier when we’re not at home and can take our time. Get ye prep properly.” Louis says and in his peripheral vision he can see Harry take a deep breath. “Or not… we don’t have to.”

“No… I … of course I want to Lou.” Harry says, staring at his lap. “I really do. Yes… I want to try.” 

“Hey.” Louis grabs for Harry’s hand and looks over to him as the traffic light goes red. “If in the moment we don’t feel like it. We stop. Promise. Let the gut decide. Yeah?” 

“Yeah… I’m good with that.” Harry smiles. “But that won’t stop my mother from cock-blocking you.” Louis laughs, and turns to the traffic light which went back to green. 

“Wha' would help then? ‘Cause I really fancy seein’ yer pigeon-toes inside some ski’s.” He says fondly. Harry giggles and leans over to kiss him on the cheek.

“Maybe…” Harry says against Louis cheek, “if we have some friends coming with us, she’ll think they’ll have an eye on us.” Harry’s head leans down on Louis’ shoulder. One of his curls tickle Louis chin, and it gets stuck in the corner of his mouth. 

“Okay… I’m presumin’ ye’re thinkin’ of Niall?” He asks while he tries to blow the curl out of his mouth. Harry hums, a low grumble which makes Louis’ fingertips tickle. “I was thinkin’ maybe ask me mates Stan and Oli… maybe Luke.” He says carefully.

“Oh… maybe.” Harry says and sits up when they reach Louis’ home. 

“Wha’?” Louis asks, unable to control his temper. Harry’s seatbelt snaps back, and he leans the back of his head against the cold window. 

“It’s just… I never met them, have I?” Harry says. “Do you really think that this is the best way to meet them, going skiing for an entire week. I…” 

“They’d love ye.” Louis says. “There’s nothin’ t’be afraid of.” 

“There’s EvErything to be afraid of!” Harry yells. Louis stares at him shocked over the sudden outburst. “Lou, they mean everything to you and if they don’t like me I’ll fuck everything up. Because your friends HAVE TO like me.” Harry whines.

“Harry… baby.” Louis says and grabs his hand over his knee. His eyes fixate on his radio. “I don’t want ye t’ be afraid of them. And I don’t ‘ave the money t’ pay for an entire week… I was more like thinkin’ about Monday to Thursday or something. Three nights.” Louis says, voice getting quiet. He doesn’t like telling people about his money issues, it’s always been a sore spot. Ever since Dean, the idiot, made fun of his second-hand shoes in third grade. “I don’t see me best friend nearly enough, Hazza. And I don’t think it’s wrong of me t’ want ye t’ meet them.” 

“Okay.” Harry says. Louis still can’t make himself look at him, but his sweet soft voice makes his heart stumble. He looks up into his green worried eyes. “So they know?” 

“Yeah, they definitely do. Stan even knaws about ye.” Louis says, “the others know about me being… being gay.” Louis gets out with a long breath. Something strange happens to Harry’s eyes, like they fog up or get more intense Louis can’t be sure what it is. Before he can think too much about it, Harry surges forward and kisses him. 

Louis breaks the kiss, “want t’ go upstairs, love?” 

Harry still looks glassy, “eh…” 

“Earth to Harry!?!” Louis says, a smile spreading over his face.

Harry shakes himself, “yes… yes of course, we should get the carrot cake to your sisters.”

“Quite, forgot about tha’.” Louis chuckles.

Louis walks into Harry’s room a few days later, he still smells like fish and his hair feels greasy. “Hey, sweet cheeks.” Louis says and bends down to kiss Harry’s cherub lips. 

“Ohh you smell good.” Harry giggles and sniffs the air like a dog. 

“Wha’ are ye doin’?” Louis asks when he sits down on the chair near the table. The room is littered with photos, and Harry is kneeling in between them. 

“I am trying to figure out which of my pictures I should use for the gallery opening. They have to be blown up big.” 

“As long as it’s not the one of me filled with yer cock or come.” Louis jokes. Harry throws a piece of paper against Louis’ temple. “How many?” 

“Fourteen. It’s a lot, Lou.” Harry says panicky. 

“Well, baby, don’t ye ‘ave some time left.” Louis asks, he remembers circling the date sometime in March.

“Yeah, but the big prints have to be printed in time.” Harry whines. 

“Just pick the ones your proudest off… like the ones you remember looking at and just feeling pride.” Louis says. Harry blinks at him with his glassy eyes again. “Or not.” Louis retreats immediately.

“No. I think that’s a good start, boo.” Harry says and immediately starts shuffling around. 

Louis swallows around a lump, and watches Harry’s naked feet find tiny free patches on the floor to find the pictures he thinks off. “I talked to me mum. She’s fine with me bein’ gone for three nights, how about yours?” 

Harry looks up. “I haven’t had the time to ask, sorry darling.” Louis hangs his head a little. 

“Yeah okay.” Louis clears his throat. “So, for me t’ go with ye, I will ‘ave t’ man the kissing booth at Valentine’s Day.” 

Harry turns to him, eyes big. “At the carnival thing?” 

“Yeah apparently they need someone to kiss random people. Properly ‘ave t’ get an STD test afterwards.” Louis jokes, it provokes a goat laugh from Harry. 

“Do I have to pay to kiss you then?” Harry asks, cocking his head to the side. 

Louis just grins, “don’t know if it’s clever to kiss a boy at one of these things.” Harry nods, his big toes touch and try to rub at each other while he stands there awkwardly. “Then again it’s supposed t’ be about a good cause, so who would stop ye.” 

“No… I won’t… don’t worry about it.” Harry says, biting his lips. 

Louis stands up and walks as close to Harry as possible. “I want ye to.” 

“No you don’t.” Harry says, wiping away a stray tear. He un-humorously laughs to himself and looks up to the ceiling. Louis grabs one of Harry curls and pulls at it, he watches it bounce up and down. 

“Yeah, I do. And when ye get t’ the damn carnival,” Louis grabs Harry’s free hand. “Ye’re goin’ t’ walk straight t’ the kissin’ booth and ye’re goin’ t’ give me the best smooch. Because I want ye too. And because ye pay for it.” Louis kisses Harry’s cute nose. “Please, smile Harry.” Harry kisses each cheek separately. “I don’t care if they notice.” 

“But you will. Because when Ash sees he’s going to pull a shit fight.” Harry says. 

Louis pecks Harry’s lips. “Hate t’ break it t’ ye Styles, but ye’re me boyfriend. Me boy! No one gets to make fun of ye. Or me. I’ll make Dan kick his ass!” 

“Dan? Why Dan?” Harry asks, voice evening out. 

“Because, dove-y, Dan has shitload to prove as a step-father, soon to be dad. And he loves defending me.” Louis chuckles and grabs Harry’s love-handle to kiss the taller boy.

“You know, last night I was dreaming we were ponies.” Harry says. 

“Ye’re so random.” Louis chuckles and kisses the stunned boy. 

The kissing booth at Valentine’s Day turns out to be very gross. Louis had to kiss Danielle at least a dozen times, Eleanor demanded some much talked about kisses, and even his own mother lined up to get a kiss on the cheek. A pound for a kiss was way too little for Louis’ amazing kisses, he figured. When he sees Liam approach he made him re-write the sign, and now it reads two pounds per kiss. _Yep Liam is cheap._

When Harry arrives, Louis’ breath catches while he is giving a girl in his maths class a kiss. He’s wearing white trouser with a pink hoodie. _What boy wears a pink hoodie_? He looks gorgeous of course. Harry does as told and power walks to the kissing booth. There are some assholes who wolf whistles when Harry throws two pounds into the glass. Louis leans over the kissing booth table to place a quick peck on Harry’s pink lips. “Ye wearing lipstick?” Louis asks.

“No.” Harry says, “though, you are messy with it. Who wears purple lipstick?” Harry pouts. 

Louis rubs the lipstick off his lips. He did notice something sticky when he got kissed about a dozen times. “Danielle, tha’ little troll.” Louis says. “She’s comin’ back every ten minutes.” Harry pouts some more, and picks at his bottom lip with his thumb and index finger.

“I don’t like it.” Harry says.

“Mean-ether, at least like this we’ll be able t’ go t’ our ski trip and fuck right?” Louis says. He dace plays himself. “Sorry, tha’ was awful of me.” 

“Yes it was.” Harry nods. “It’s fine, I know how you meant it.”

“Thank God. I’m sorry I don’t know how to talk about emotions.” Louis smiles, and sees a small line forming.

Harry shrugs, “I can read you.” 

“Good, good.” Louis cuts the conversation short. “Who are ye here with?” 

“Brett, he’s an old friend from elementary school.” Harry says and points over his shoulder at a boy with short mousey hair. Louis notices Brett’s taller than himself, it peeves him for an unknown reason.

“Cool.” Louis says, swallowing hard. “I ‘ave t’ get back t’ work.” He points to the line and Harry turns around surprised to see the large line. 

“Sure. See you after?” Harry asks, sounding as hopeful as the day Louis saw him in his kitchen for the first time.

“Of course, I’m off in two hours.” Louis confirms. Harry steps away and Jade throws two pounds into Louis’ glass. “Really?” Louis asks her.

“Figured this is my only time to try.” Jade grins, grabs his neck and gives him a hard kiss. “How was it for you?” Jade asks.

Louis laughs, “a little forceful love.” Louis has to kiss a few more girls: Antonia, Fizzy’s friends and Rachel, a friend of Eleanor. And then there is Zayn. Louis frowns when he wipes away Rachel’s strawberry tasting chapstick when Zayn lets two pounds clink into the glass. “Hell no, mate.”

“Come on,” Zayn says. “What will they think when you kiss Harry but not me.” Louis hates that he’s right. 

“Get it over with.” Louis groans. Zayn steps forward and presses a lingering, but very fleeting kiss on his lips. Louis has his eyes open and can see Zayn look right back at him. Zayn’s brown eyes are undefinable. There’s something wrong in them. Louis surges backwards like he wants to puke. 

“Not bad.” Zayn chuckles with venom, before he turns and walks away. Louis brushes his hand over his mouth, trying to erase the feeling of his lips on his old best friend. When he sees the next girl pay, he finds Liam in the crowd at the cotton candy staring back at him. Tears start to well in Louis eyes. The girl grabs his face and kisses him, smearing red lipstick all over Louis’ lips. He lets her kiss him for a few too long moments, before he presses away from her. He grabs the full glass.

“Sorry girls, I’m closed.” Louis calls. He passes his mother on his lookout for Harry and thrusts the glass into her arms.

“Where are ye going?” She asks him, but Louis is already off. Frantically he looks at the different little groups standing around. None of them are Brett. None of them are Harry. He walks into the school building. Harry is standing with a couple blokes. Louis walks up to them, grabs Harry’s wrist.

Harry yelps from the sudden tugging. Brett is screaming after them, “Harry, mate, what is this?” 

Louis see his destination and walks the curly-haired boy to a broom closet. Louis kicks the door closed behind them. He quickly slithers his arms around Harry’s neck and starts kissing Harry. “Mhhmm….Lou.” He complains. There is lipstick all over Louis. 

“Harry, please, kiss them away. Only want to taste you.” He whimpers, half crying. Harry takes mercy and starts kissing Louis, opening his mouth with his tongue and slips their tongues against each other. Harry’s strong hands find Louis’ bum and hoist him up. Louis moans obscenely and his legs secure around Harry's waist. He feels his head spin from the weightlessness of being manhandled.

“My poor baby.” Harry whispers into his mouth. “All those disgusting girls.”

“Don't stop.” Louis moans, when Harry rams him against the closed door and kiss him along his neck. “Just don’t stop.” He can feel Harry getting hard, where he is pressing against Louis’ crotch. 

“Who made you this way?” Harry asks. 

“How is tha’?” Louis asks, his tears getting salty and dry on his cheeks.

“Epic. Just epic.” Harry whispers against his ears. Louis pushes him backwards, so he can look at him. His stomach swirls in a million directions. Louis lifts his hand to Harry’s cheek and traces his cheek, his nose, under his eye. He rubs over his eyebrows and touches his earlobe.

“Oh Harry.” Louis whispers, before he follows Harry’s lips with his thumb.

“What?” Harry speaks softly, afraid to break the trance Louis seems to be in. 

Louis looks up from watching Harry’s hips to his green eyes. They look like they are sparkling, not glassy any more. Just sparkling. “You’re just… beautiful. So God-damn beautiful, ye put the Gods to shame.” Harry blinks at him surprised. Louis places another soft kiss on his lips.

💚🍑💙

The little fluttery feeling which he felt in the broom closet hasn’t gone away. He rubs his toes against each other in an attempt to make the tingly feeling on his skin rub off. But it doesn’t. He feels like he’s electric. He’s afraid to wash his hands in the morning in case he electrocutes himself. Which is ridiculous. 

Louis grumbles, when he stares down at the Barbie’s he’s currently trying to make kiss like the twins asked. “I love ye like no other.” Louis says in the voice of Barbie One. “Ye bewitched me ye devil.” He says in the voice of Barbie Two. 

“They don’t like each other, Louis!” Daisy scolds him. She takes away Barbie One and puts her on a plastic horse. 

“I got a vibe she’s a witch.” Louis says shaking Barbie Two in his hand.

“No way.” Phoebe says. “She’s a nurse. She makes babies.” Louis doesn’t how to explain the many issues in her sentence when he hears Harry’s footsteps coming down his staircase.

“All done Jay.” Harry says and claps his hands against each other like he just worked very hard. _He’s just boasting._

“Thank you, dear.” Jay says, going on her tip toes to give him a kiss. “It’s good to have a man in the house.” Jay says.

“HEEEY.” Louis complains, but his mother just laughs walking up the stairs. She’s properly going to the spare bedroom to see how far Harry and Dan had got building the old nursery back together. Louis had suspected she’d buy a new one with Dan being loaded and all, but his mother had convinced them all that with the sixth kid the old nursery is almost a tradition. 

“Well, I’m off.” Harry says, putting his coat back on and hiding his cute curls under a Green Bay Packers beanie. 

“Great, see ye tomorrow. I’ll pick ye up at three sharp, so be packed and ready.” Louis says where he is sitting on the floor near the coach. Barbie One is riding around on the floor in front of him, and runs over Barbie Two. According to the twins this does not hurt Barbie Two and Louis just grins, fixing his eyes back on Harry. After Louis had begged his mother to talk to Anne about letting Harry come with him on the ski trip, Anne had agreed. They were ready to depart tomorrow.

Harry jumps on one foot pressing the other into his shoe. Louis feels his mouth split into a fond smile. “Okay… Bye, love you.” Harry says and freezes. He said _it_ like it was the most normal thing to say when he leaves out the door. Louis blinks at him.

💚🍑💙

_I said it._

_OH you useless dumb chicken… way too early… much too early… we’ve only been dating for the last month you bloody dweeb. Look at how he’s looking at you now! He’s never going to say it back. Louis! please don’t be mad. Oh God what have I done._

_Too bloody early._

_I’m so stupid. Can never keep anything a secret. Shit just spills out of my mouth. I’m too stupid to hold my breath. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Stupid for one cute boy, who hasn’t moved since I said_ IT _. I’m a fool. A fool for you._

_Please say it back._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading another chapter... please click for a kudos if you enjoyed and leave me a comment 💝  
> if you want to talk to me you can reach me on instagram under https://www.instagram.com/firstexiledqueen/
> 
> Some explanatory notes:  
> 1\. The date was heavily influenced by Night Changes - One Direction music video  
> 2\. The drawn artwork is from prettytruthsandlies and AKIANYWAY  
> 3\. Niall's injury is inspired by his real knee injury, which management ignored, because it didn't fit into their plans  
> 4\. On Harry's birthday in 2014 there really was a ManU game, from where I got all the stats  
> 5\. I don't hate Zayn.


	11. Portraits of Tranquillity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's Day everyone 💙💚💛   
> (I felt rebellious today and hugged someone ;0)
> 
> So I got a new job (yay me), the next chapter might take a lill longer.
> 
> (Trigger Warnings: smut (yay); language (like always hah), there is mention of a relationship outside of the tagged ones, a bit of gay panic here and there, might be a bit anxiety.)

“Okay… Bye, love you.”

Louis can see Harry freeze. His body is so still, Louis can almost hear him scold himself. The fluttery feeling in his own body is trying to break out of his tummy. His stomach is turning and churning. Louis’ heart is fluttering, and he only blinks at poor Harry a few moments. _Love, he said love._ Louis blinks again, shrugs and says “love ye too.”

There’s a strange sound which Louis belatedly realises is his own mouth making weird strangling wet sounds. Harry runs to him, pushes Daisy out of the way, and grabs Louis’ face. “I love you. I love you, Lou!” 

“Love ye too, Harry.” Louis whispers against Harry’s plush lips. “I’m afraid ye might be the love of me life.” 

Harry catches Louis’ tears with his thumbs, gently stroking him under his eye. “Why are you afraid?” 

“Because I was a prick t’ ye. And I broke the heart of the love of me life so many times. Because ye are ye and will never hurt me the way I deserve.” Louis says, sobs breaking through his lips.

“Louis, you deserve the world. And I will lay it at your feet.” Harry whispers. And all Louis sees is green, green and more green.

“What’s wrong with him?” Daisy asks, she and her twin stood up and are eyeing their brother worriedly. 

“He just needs a hug.” Harry says. Daisy and Phoebe rush forward and hang on Louis’ neck like baby monkeys.Harry giggles as he watches them litter Louis’ face with kisses.

“Don’t be sad big brother.” Phoebe says against his cheek. 

“I’m not.” Louis says, “cheers girls.” He preps both girls with a kiss and looks over to Harry who is still kneeling in front of him. “I love you, Harry.” His fingers tingle, and his gut quivers. Harry looks at him with his eyes crinkling. 

💚🍑💙

“Alright boo bear.” Jay says, and pats Louis head where he’s standing in front of Bertie. The car moans when Dan heaves his suitcase into the back. Louis cringes at the awful sound. “Now I want ye to promise me something!” 

Louis blinks at her, “oh no… wha’s goin’ on?”

“So dramatic,” Jay says and rolls her eyes. 

“Honestly, mum, where do ye think I get it from?” Louis chuckles. 

“Don’t look at me young man. It’s quite obvious all this is something I had no part in.” Jay says, raising a finger in warning. 

Louis chuckles and whispers “as if.”

“Louis, I need ye to promise me tha’ ye won’t forget about Harry!” 

“Wha’ do ye mean?” Louis asks.

“Sweetheart, I’m a bit worried that ye will see yer old friends again and will be off. Like ye’d forget that he’s there. I want ye to include him in everything, ye hear.” Jay says with a warning.

“Alright, alright, I promise.” Louis grumbles. “Ye should knaw, though, he’s all I ever think about!” 

Jay laughs, “I know, it’s quite pathetic.”

“Cheers, mum.” Louis mumbles and gets into the car. “I’ll go get him.” 

“Calm down, kid.” Jay says, throwing open the door. “Wait here, Louis. Give me a hug goodbye.” She shakes her head, when Louis quickly jumps back out to hug her, which is getting increasingly hard with the baseball in between them.

“Mum, ye’re only half-way there, how are ye this huge?” Louis asks, when he successfully kisses her cheek. Jay swats Louis hand. 

“Don’t ever say that to a pregnant woman!” She warns, eyes fiery red.

“Sorry.” Louis giggles and hurries back into the car. He waves at Dan when he drives out on to the street. He gets to Harry’s house in record time, and Anne smiles at him when she lets Louis into the house. 

“He’s upstairs with Gemma.” She says. Louis throws his shoes off and rushes upstairs. 

“Where are ye!??! HAROLD!” Louis screams through the house, without any care for the fact that this isn’t his own home.

“Here.” A little voice calls, and Louis kicks open the bathroom door. Harry is sitting on a chair, shirtless, a towel around his neck. Gemma is leaning over him with scissors.

Louis jumps forward and wraps his hand securely around Gemma’s wrist, “the fuck are ye doin’?”

“Relax Louis. I always cut his hair!” Gemma says and kicks at his ankles. 

“Ow.” Louis complains and leans down to rub them, effectively forcing him to let go of Gemma’s wrist. She hums happily, and Louis can hear the sipping sound of scissors opening and closing. Louis can see a few locks falling to the floor. He pouts when he looks up at Harry, who is grinning at him.

“Hi darling.” Harry smiles. Louis continues pouting at him.

“Why are ye cuttin’ yer hair, love?” Louis asks. “I love yer hair.” 

“Just the tips, so they can grow faster.” Harry smiles.

“So ye’re not backin’ out of growin’ it out?” Louis asks.

“Of course not.” Harry says and puckers his lips. He points at them before mumbling, “now kiss me you fool.” Louis indulges and gives Harry a quick kiss. 

“All done.” Gemma says, carefully placing the scissors back on the counter top.

“Ye all packed than?” Louis asks giddily. 

“Mhm….” Harry smiles, nodding overdramatic.

“Put a shirt on and let’s get going, baby.” Louis says excitedly, “got a long way to drive.” Harry nods and gets on his feet quickly. Gemma scoffs when she watches her brother stumble over the floor to get to his room. 

“You be nice to him.” Gemma says with a glare. 

“Always, Gem.” Louis grins and hurries after Harry. Together they drag Harry’s suitcase down the stairs. 

“Give it here lads.” Harry’s father appears and grabs the strap out of Louis’ hand. Louis pouts as he watches Des and Harry carry the thing to his car. 

“He’s very excited about this.” Anne says, wringing her hands. It’s an echo of Harry’s nervous tick of twirl his rings. “He’s also a little nervous.” 

“Yeah, well, no need t’ worry I’ll protect him.” Louis smiles at her and circles her in a tight hug. She smells like apples, and Louis comfortably breathes into her dark straight hair.

“We’re all set.” Des says from the door. “So you will pick up the other three boys on the way, yes?” 

“Ahm yes.” Louis nods, once he’s released from Anne’s comfortable embrace. “A little out of the way, but it’ll be fine.” 

“Harry said something about 8 and a half hours up there. Your friends, they can drive? I just don’t want you to get tired and drive all the way.” Des says, his worried father tone slipping in.

“Yes, all of them in fact. Harry’s the only virgin.” Louis laughs, but Des pulls a face. _Shit, I can’t believe I said tha’._ “I mean with drivin’, he’s a virgin in drivin’… not a virgin as such, I mean he is… shit.” Louis starts panicking. Des just stares at him. 

Harry’s father turns around and with a very hard grasp on Louis shoulder he stares into his eyes. Louis can feel his thumb poking him harshly. He wants to wince, but manages to face Des’ eyes. 

Des is about a head taller than Louis, “listen. If you hurt my boy, I will be your worst nightmare. He’s my son, kid. As much as I want him to remain a virgin, I want him to grow up too. So you hurt him, I swear…” Des trails off. 

Louis nods, staying as strong as possible, “I love him, Mr. Styles. He’s me boy too.” Des’ lips quirk into a smile, before he lets him go. He turns to his son, “have fun yeah? Any problem, you can always reach me or mum!” He kisses the top of Harry’s curls.

“Okay.” Harry says, a faint sheer of red appearing on his cheeks. Louis gives him some privacy by quietly getting into the car. Robin and Anne say goodbye to Harry. Louis smiles when he hears Harry says “you’re making it out as if I’d be gone forever.” 

“Hush and embrace the love.” Anne giggles. Harry slides into the car, cheeks red, eyes cast down. Louis starts the engine. 

“Ye look beautiful when ye blush. Just thought ye should knaw.” Louis smiles, when Harry turns into a tomato.

“Will your car make it?” Harry asks, looking down at the car, while it makes a groan when turning on to the street. 

“ ‘Course she will.” Louis says, patting the car like a pet. 

“What did my dad say to you?” 

“Nothing.” Louis evades. 

“Right.” Harry scoffs, while he fiddles with his jumper. 

“Take this, baby.”Louis says and grabs the AUX-cable. “Put on some music will ye?” 

Harry pulls at his phone inside his impossibly tight pants. His hips buck up into the air, fighting the seatbelt. Louis feels his hand itch to touch. “I’m only doing it, if you tell me what dad said.” Harry says, once his cute bum is back in the seat.

“Argh…” Louis groans. “He told me tha’ he has no problem with ye growing up. He understands ye won’t be a virgin forever… and somethin’ about me not hurtin’ ye.” 

“Oh.” Harry says, and connects his phone with the AUX.

“I think, weirdly, tha’ he was givin’ me permission.” Louis says, grinning from ear to ear like he won something.

“Ha!” Harry laughs in an absurd loud squeal. “You wish.” Louis giggles too and with a lot of complaining on Louis’ side they start listening to ABBA.

Just as they pull into Doncaster, a good two hours later, Harry had almost lost his voice from singing. “What is tha’ even? Che… chiqui… chaqua… can’t even pronounce it.” Louis complains about the current song. 

“Chiquitita.” Harry giggles, his voice a little lighter than usual. “It means ‘little one’. If you will, you are my chiquitita.”

“Oi, watch out who ye’re callin’ little!” Louis says with a warning. Harry only giggles and turns his body to stare at Louis. “Stop doin’ tha’!” 

“What?” Harry asks.

“Stare at me.”Louis mumbles, flipping his fringe.

“But you’re so gorgeous.” Harry mumbles against the seat cushion. Louis smiles, heat blossoming on his face. He parks on the street in front of Stan’s house and honks once. He leans over to poke at Harry’s dimple. 

“I love you.” Louis whispers against his mouth. Harry kisses him. Someone knocks against the window, jostling the two apart. 

“Oi mate. Stop snogging, let’s get this bitch up the road.” Stan laughs, and Oli opens the boot. 

Louis opens the door and reaches Oli quickly. “Who ye callin’ a bitch?” 

“Yer car, mate.” Stan grins. “Hey, I’m Stan.” He holds out his hand to Harry, who stumbles to join them. “We met at Louis’ birthday before, but we didn’t get introduced.” Louis winces when he thinks back on that night. How drunk he got. How mad he was at Harry. How he had told Harry the man he was dancing with was the boy he had sex with during his time in Ibiza. 

Harry’s eyes reflect much of the same memory, before he holds out his hand “Harry.” 

“I’m Oli if anyone cares.” Oli says, while he rearranges the suitcases to fit into the boot.

“I care.” Harry says quickly, and Oli snorts through his long nose. 

“Everyone ready for a 6 hour 40 drive?” Louis claps his hand together. 

“As ready as I’ll ever be sitting cramped in yer old car.” Oli says, slamming the boot closed. 

“Oh fock off.” Louis says. “She’s perfect. Here tha’ old girl, we’re perfect.” He pats the hood while he talks to it.

Harry giggles, when Oli whispers something to him about Louis losing his mind. 

“Oi, how about some fish and chips for the road, aye?” Louis says excitedly. Everyone agrees, and they quickly get into the car. Harry hesitates before getting in. “Wha’?”

“I just… does anyone else want to be up front? I can sit back.” 

“Nah it’s fine.” Stan waves him off, “sweet of ye t’ ask, though.” He says warmly. 

Seven hours later, Louis’ car rolls into Nevis Range Mountain Resort in the far North of the Scottish Highlands. “Oi, wake up lovebirds.” Stan calls over his shoulder. Along the way they switched drivers twice, and after Stan took the helm, Oli sat down in the passenger seat. It was partly a relief to get some new music playing, but he also missed Harry’s humming when he sang along to the songs. After Harry incessantly poked him, Louis unbuckled and squished himself on the tiny middle seat. He had his face full of curls ever since.

Louis leans forward and flicks Stan’s ear, “shut up. We aren’t even there yet.” 

“Yes we are.” Oli grins, when they drive onto the property of the castle hotel. It’s made of large stones reaching into the sky. It looks gloomy with some honey glazed lights flickering up at it from the garden. 

“Oh My God.” Harry says, mouth agape when he looks up the tall building. Stan drives around it to take park the car in the free parking to the right of the castle. “Can we afford this?” 

“Yes.” Louis says, rubbing the back of Harry’s hand. “We got some really good offers. They basically threw it at us!” Louis says with a slight close-lipped smile. Harry looks back at him with a crinkled nose. Louis leans forward and kisses it. “Look at it as ye’re Valentine’s Day present, I didn’t get ye anything this year.” Louis says. Harry nods dumbfounded. 

The four boys get their things out of the car and happily chattering they enter the hotel. Harry’s mouth falls open when his round eyes look up at the large chandelier underneath them. Louis smiles, just that look made it all worth it. “Hi,” he says to the receptionist at the large wooden desk. “Tomlinson, we have two room reservations.” The girl starts typing, taking Louis’ ID. 

“OH… ehm…” the girl says.

“Everything alright?” Stan asks the girl, leaning on the top of her desk. 

“It’s just, we have you reserved under one two-bed room and one king bedroom. I can check and see if we have another two-bed if you want.” She says looking at them apologetically. Louis stares at her, he doesn’t really get the problem. “I’m sure it would be more comfortable for you boys.” She starts typing away. Louis looks over his shoulder at Harry who is standing a bit behind them. He’s mauling his bottom lip and fiddling with his hand. 

“No. No.” Louis shakes himself. “Tha’s exactly wha’ we wanted, dear. Him and me share.” Louis points over his shoulder at the mop of curls, who is now perking up with a shy grin breaking over his lips.

“Oh… ohhh.” She says, eyes going larger. A blush rises over her face, while she feverishly types away on the keyboard. Louis rolls his eyes and Stan starts giggling. “Would you like to take a seat over there, and I’ll get everything sorted.” 

They leave their luggage with the girl as they take a seat at a small set of pink creaking couches. Stan starts telling Louis about a story he heard from Luke. Louis disinvited Luke after Harry had asked him to. Harry had recognised the name Luke as the one who had slept with Louis in Ibiza. The wound was still too deep.

Harry twiddles his ring around his finger when he watches Louis talk. Oli laughs at something Stan just said when he sees Harry’s awkwardness. He scoots closer to the younger boy, “he’s mostly a big tit, in’t he?” 

Harry looks up, a shy smile plays on his lips. “No… he’s…”

“Being a tit.” Oli grins, making Harry giggle a bit. 

“Yeah, suppose so.” Harry admits, watching Louis flips his fringe. Oh how he’d love to run his hand through it.

“He just missed his lads.” Oli comforts Harry who simply nods. “Ye changed him, Harry. Louis has a huge problem with pride, yeah? Always has. Suppose it’s a my-dad-left-when-I-was-a-baby thing. But ye are makin’ him… I don’t knaw… conscious. Like he’s finally walking head above water. You’re freeing him.” 

“That’s really lovely, cheers.” Harry says, eyes a little watery.

“None of tha’ now.” Oli jokes, pointing at Harry’s eyes. The boy starts blinking rapidly to dry them again and force them to stop. The awkward receptionist returns with their passports and room keys. A porter brings their suitcases up for them. 

Their rooms are right next to each other and Stan jokes, “don’t want t’ hear yer moans tonight, yeah?” The couple giggles uncomfortably. They make plans for dinner, and Harry gets into the room. 

“It looks so old school.” Harry says, while he traces the yellow wallpaper. 

“Sorry love.” Louis says, when his eyes fall on a heavily hooded canopy bed. Large floor-long windows allow the stars to peak their light into the room. 

“I like it.” Harry says turning around to face him with a big smile. “I feel princess-y.” 

Louis smiles and approaches him, “well, princess I think this is the perfect place t’ make love t’ ye.” Louis goes on his tip toes and brushes their lips together. Harry’s fingers twitch a little when he places them on his hips. Louis can feel his nerves. “Hey, ye okay?” 

“A bit nervous about tonight.” Harry mumbles against his lips. Louis runs his hand into his nape and plays with the tiny curls there. 

“We don’t ‘ave t’ do anythin’ ye don’t want.” Louis says. 

“I know. But I want to. I want it to be you.” Harry says, tilting his head down to catch Louis’ lip in a heated kiss. A knock on the door breaks them apart. The porter brushes past them to place the bags on a small stretcher next to the closet.

“Cheers mate.” Louis says, placing a few bills in the man’s hand. 

“Good night sirs.” The dark-skinned man says and nods in thanks. 

“That was smooth.” Harry giggles, jumping on the bed with his legs bouncing. “You’re a smooth tipper.” Harry explains.

“Yeah? Ye think so?” Louis asks, he slips on to the bed, pressing Harry down on the bed. “I’m pretty smooth with other stuff.” 

“Other stuff?” Harry teases, a hand finding its way under his shirt. Louis shivers from Harry warm palm.

“I can show ye a thing or two.” Louis teases, his breath ghosting over Harry’s neck. 

“Oh Louis.” Harry whines and gently wiggles his legs. Louis giggles before he bites his neck lightly. This time his moan flies freely from his lips. Harry’s pants start tenting. Louis hands tentatively dances on the skin above his jeans button. Their eyes meet. 

“Wha’? Wha’ are ye thinkin’ about?” Louis asks, after their eyes stayed fixed on each other for too long. 

“Nothing.” Harry whispers. “You.” 

“Good things I hope.” Louis says, leaning down to leave a dozen kisses on his lips. 

“I thought you knew, I always think about your bum.” Harry murmurs when Louis gives him time to breathe. Louis chuckles against his lips. He sits up and looks down at Harry. There’s nothing specific going through his mind. He’s just looking. And enjoying the view, “what?” Harry asks, brushing away a stray curl. “What are you looking at?” 

“Nothing.” Louis says earnestly. “You.” Harry beams at him, a proud smile splitting his face into a frog. 

A knock on the door startles the two. “Oi, get out here. We’re hungry, fuckers!” Oli screams from the other side of the door. Louis scrambles off of Harry, and quickly changes his trackies for some jeans. Harry watches him smiling.

They wander the small Resort for a few minutes, beforethey decide on a nice small restaurant which offers sushi. The Dony boys never had sushi before, “tha’ sort’a thing don’t exist in Dony!” Stan had exclaimed.

“But you live in London now.” Harry had argued, leaning into Louis for comfort.

“Don’t trust them.” Stan argued. Louis had made the executive decision his friends would have to learn about new things and pushed them all through the mahogany door. Harry ended up helping teach the boys how to hold the chopsticks. 

“Look you have to do the Vulcan salute.” Harry holds up his hand spreading his ring and pinkie finger from the others. “You place the bottom stick on the ring finger, so it’s steady.” He does so to show them. Stan is following along nicely, but Oli is having problems, not mastering the salute very well. “And the other chopstick you place here,” he puts it into the nook of his thumb. “And then you can push them together and apart like this, like a robot grabby motion.” 

“… robot grabby motion.” Oli repeats, shaking his head. “Honestly lad, ye should get a medal for doin’ tha’!” Harry giggles, cheeks going red, but he presses his lips together with a smirk.

Louis rolls his eyes, and punches his chopstick into the inside out roll, “or you just levitate.” With the chopstick run through the sushi, he lifts it to his lip, it spins a bit like a cartwheel. “Works most of the time,” Louis exclaims with a full mouth. The better half of his roll is a sad puddle on his plate.

Oli starts using his hands, “ye don’t mind do ye, Haz? I’m useless.” 

“Wouldn’t stand in the way.” Harry grins. 

“So Louis said you do photography?” Oli asks him.

Harry’s mouth is full, and he points to it, chewing quickly, almost choking with how fast he wants to talk. “Yes.” Harry says. 

“And ye got a show, right?” Stan asks.

“He told you all of that?” Harry asks, eyes shifting to Louis, who is suddenly very interested in picking up some soaked rice from his plate.

“Mate, I knaw too much about ye!” Oli laughs. Harry awkwardly laughs. “Yer show is in Manchester, aye?” 

“Yes. Last weekend of March.” 

“Tell us the date, and will come over, aye?” Stan says. Louis notices his boyfriend’s shoulders sag down a bit and his back leaning forward. _Good he’s relaxing,_ Louis thinks. The night goes on, and every hour his legs starts bouncing harder under the table. He’s still got plans. Plans with Harry. He giddily looks at his phone to see the time, when Harry’s large hand grabs his thigh in one strong grip. _Jesus, just look at tha’. His entire bloody hand encompasses me leg._ The view doesn’t help his growing erection.

“Stop being so impatient.” Harry whispers. 

“Aren’t ye?” Louis counters, aware his friends exchange amused glances.

“I … of course… but you should enjoy your time with your friends. We got an entire night.” Harry says. Oli overhears and chuckles, before raising his hand and waving over the waitress for the bill. 

“We can stay some more.” Louis says.

“Nah, no worries mate. Pretty knackered.” Stan says, winking at Harry. They pay and go back to the castle hotel. The wind howls and brushes cold icy wind beneath their warm clothes. Louis searches for Harry. The taller boy’s long arm pushes him into his hip and Louis circles his own around Harry’s body. Harry’s potent scent spreads into his nose. Louis nuzzled closer, enjoying the comfortable warmth Harry exudes. 

They separate in front of their room. “Not too much moaning, please.” Stan jokes and enters the room.

“Same jokes get lame, lad.” Louis says back, before pulling Harry into their room. Harry remains quiet. “Ye okay, pumpkin?” Louis asks him.

Harry is standing in front of their bed, staring down at it. “Nervous.” He whispers. Louis comes to stand behind him and kisses his shoulder. 

“Don’t ‘ave t’ be, it’s just me.” Louis whispers into his ear, steps up on his tip toes and sucks Harry’s earlobe into his mouth. Harry’s shoulder sag, the tension seeps out of him like a deflating balloon. Louis’ grabs for Harry’s hip, slides his hand under his warm shirt and rubs him over his stomach. Harry shivers a bit.

“I love you, Louis.” Harry whispers, eyes finally looking over his shoulder. It make Louis all giddy when Harry says it, his stomach doing somersaults. The taller boy turns in his grasp. Louis’ hand travels along with him over his back to rest at the back of his pants. His fingers leave tingly trails behind, and goosebumps develop all over Harry’s skin. Harry’s large hands raise to cup Louis’ cheeks. “You’re so beautiful.” 

“Thank you.” Louis whispers, completely disarmed. He’s still not used to people telling him something like that. Harry smiles before he dugs his head, to attach their lips. Louis closes his eyes while he presses back against his lips. There’s no urgency behind the kiss, he’s simply enjoying the rosy cherub lips moving against his own. Harry releases a moan, opening his lips. Louis’ part with his, and suddenly there’s a wet tongue pressed against his. It feels like to fish rubbing against each other. Harry’s hands keep Louis in place, while Louis tries to move them backwards. Harry’s moans press into Louis, making him twitch.

Harry’s calves hit the back of the bed. Releasing Louis he grabs his bum, lifting him off of his feet and into his lap. He loses all his barging for a second, just feeling the weightlessness of being lifted into the air while sucking on Harry’s tongue makes him dizzy. The curly-haired boy lets himself fall backwards on top of the sheets, Louis’ breath hitches when he falls on top of him, so he is straddling him. He connects their lips again, spreading Harry’s with force. Wild tremors shake him, kissing him even deeper. Harry’s hand glides beneath Louis’ jeans and grabs a handful of his bum. The rings on Harry’s fingers dig into his flesh making Louis hum appreciatively. This feels so right, so good. 

Louis runs his hand down Harry’s infatuating body. His own fingers twitch when he pops the button of Harry’s pants. The button goes willingly almost as if it had been dying to be released from the stretch Harry put on the too tight pants. Louis detaches his lips and travels downward. Harry’s body trembles. The way the boy tenses under him worries him, “Hey… hey… hey…” Louis shifts back up quickly. “Love look at me. Wha’s wrong. Baby, ye’re tremblin’. Yer scarin’ me.” Louis grabs Harry’s face, delicately turning Harry head to face him. The green eyes are clenched closed. “Hazzah?” 

“I’m sorry.” Harry says, jaw tense.

Louis shifts off of Harry’s hips, and caresses his cheek. “Can ye tell me wha’s goin’ on?” Louis waits while Harry takes some deep breaths. They randomly remind him of the weird deep breathing things his sisters make when they all do yoga together. He leans over and kisses Harry’s cheek, hoping it calms his baby down.

“I can’t… I’m sorry Lou!” Harry says, bottom lip trembling. “I’m so sorry.”

“Can’t? Can’t what, my love?” Louis asks him. The worry seeps into his gut, and he can feel himself start to panic. 

Harry doesn’t meet his eyes. “I’m afraid.” Harry admits. “I don’t want to have sex tonight.” Louis freezes. And releases the tension in his stomach he didn’t realise he was holding. The panic leaves him just as quickly as it came.

“We don’t ‘ave t’. Look at me.” Harry’s eyes flutter open, a tiny hint of panic swimming in them. “I told ye, we don’t ‘ave t’ do nothin’.” 

“I don’t want to disappoint you!” Harry says in desperation. 

“Don’t worry about shit like tha’! Ye could never disappoint me, ye hear?!” Louis says, trying to pour as much honesty as he can into the words. “I love you, Harrah. Ye hear me? I love ye. And I will take wha’ ever ye wan’ t’ give me! I’ll wait. Baby, I’ll wait till the end of me days if I ‘ave t’.” 

Harry finally smiles and Louis exhales a relieved breath. “You are prefect you know?” 

“Definitely not.” Louis giggles. “But ye on the other hand. So loyal, so beautiful, so kind. Ye’re everything, Haz. Ye are everythin’!” Louis kisses him. Softly Harry kisses him back, hand grabbing at his shoulder he pulls Louis closer. He nuzzles his small nose into the long neck and breathes him in. “Do ye want t’ watch some telly?” 

Harry kisses his temple, “yeah, let’s do that.” They quickly go through the bathroom one after the other. Waiting for Harry, Louis flips through the programs on the telly nicely tugged under the sheets. 

“I found Friends.” Louis tells Harry with triumph. Harry smiles at him and shifts out of his clothes. They pile on the floor, and Louis has to avert his eyes. _Don’t get hard, don’t get hard!_ Harry chuckles when he slides into the bed next to him. 

Harry’s hand finds his tummy, “I’m really happy I’m allowed to touch you here now.” 

“Hmm…” Louis grumbles, to be honest he still does not like his tummy. But the way Harry likes to rub him, touch him and the way his fingertips grab him, well he does like that. He’s not wearing much, and he can feel himself tenting in his boxer briefs. Warmth wraps him in, when Harry (aka ‘the furnace’) scrambles to get closer to him. Harry’s fingers play with his boxers. “Wha’ are ye doin’ Harold?” Louis asks, trying to ignore Harry’s nudity.

Harry kisses his shoulder and blinks at him, green eyes obscured by long eyelashes. “I want to blow you.” 

“Really?” Louis asks confused. “I thought ye didn’t want t’.” 

Harry scoffs, “I’m too nervous to for penetrative sex today, don’t mean I don’t want to feel you in my mouth.” 

“T’ be honest, I thought tha’ was exactly what ye said.” Louis says, feeling Harry’s warm fingers inch their way underneath his briefs. 

“Will you let me?” Harry asks shrugging. Louis rolls his eyes, he lifts the covers and allows Harry to slip beneath the blanket. Louis’ head falls back into the pillows, when Harry’s long tongue licks him once from his balls all the way to his crown. Harry licks his hand and pulls Louis’ foreskin out of the way. Hot heat surrounds his cock, and Louis twitches into full hardness. Harry deep-throats and his nose rubs against Louis’ pubes.

“Look gorgeous.” Louis moans. “Fuck,” he whines when he tugs on Harry’s hair. Harry’s moan vibrates around Louis’ cock. He pops off of his red angry cock, and follows Louis’ guide to his balls. He sucks one of them gently between his lips. Louis tugs on him again, but Harry doesn’t pay attention to his cock any more when he kisses down his perineum. Anticipation runs through his body and shoots into his toes. Louis curls them. “Harry, wha’ are ye doin’?” He asks dumbly. But there’s just a puff of air from a chuckle tickling over his hole. “If you do tha’ I’m goin’ t’ come.” Louis warns him.

“Then come.” Harry says, before licking him once with a flat tongue. Before Louis can protest or beg, the tip of Harry’s tongue dips inside him. The wet wiggly feeling makes Louis buck forward. His cock rubs into Harry’s curls. It feels velvety and soft, they scratch lightly on his tip. 

“HARRY!” He moans and cum squirts out of him. Harry squeaks in surprise, when his head feels glitchy and sticky. 

“Did you just come in my hair?” Harry asks once he’s on eye-level with him, and Louis lies there boneless.

“Sorry, felt so good.” Louis mumbles, he licks his lips, eyes rolling in his sockets. “Bloody good orgasm, Hazzy.” Harry kisses him gently. 

“I’m going to have a shower then.” Harry says. Louis giggles when he watches him walk off, he walks funny and when Louis sees him step into the bathroom Harry’s cock is hard. 

“Wait. I’m joinin’ ye.” Louis says and fights his boxers which tangle around his ankles. 

“Hurry up then.” Harry calls.

“Comin’! Comin’!” 

💚🍑💙

The first day on the slopes is quite disastrous. In a weird coincidence, the baby giraffe of the group is the most balanced one on skis. Stan is slightly fighting his snowboard in the begging, but he gets the hang off it, after Harry laughed his heart out when he fell on his bum one too many times. Louis hasn’t been on skis for a while. But he insisted on an intermediate slope. Why would he admit to a blue slope? Anyone can do easy. No Louis needed to prove how awesome he was. He ended up slipping and falling head first into a puddle of snow at the side of the slope. A kid who was attached to his parent by a leash laughed at him.

Harry comes to a stop. “Hey.” He grabs Louis hand and pulls him to his feet. “You okay?” He asks giggling. Louis raises his nose into the sky and pets the snow off of his ski-suit. 

“Fock off.” Louis says. Harry giggles. “Great, now I’m wet.” Harry keeps giggling. “Shut up, you!” 

Harry takes two elegant turns to move away from Louis. “Come on snowman, let’s get to a blue slope.” 

“Don’t need tha’!” Louis commands.

“TOMLINSON!” Harry shouts. “Kindly, shut up. Don’t want a hospital visit.” Louis pouts, but starts skiing behind his boyfriend, trying to copy the elegant curves Harry makes. _Should be safer than bellowing down the mountain_. 

As if Harry had known it, they do end up in the hospital at the end of the day. It happens after lunch. Harry takes an innocent fall, when Stan loses control of his snowboard again and practically tumbles Harry’s body over his. Harry squeaks like a girl, when the skis snap off of his boot. Oli scrambles after one of them, which decided to drive on without Harry. “Shit, are ye okay?” Stan asks, trying to crawl upwards to Harry’s body. “I don’t knaw what happened, suddenly lost all control.” 

“It’s fine.” Harry says, when he resurfaces. 

“Harry!” Louis comes by. He lets himself drop sideways onto the snow next to him. “Tha’ looked nasty, are ye okay?” 

“I’m fine, darling.” Harry says, readjusting his helmet. He winces when his wrist moves.

“Ye tosser, don’t ye got eyes?” Louis screams at Stan. A mother scorns when she drives by the puddle of friends.

“I’m sorry, mate. Has been ages since I’ve been on the slopes. Suppose I got too much food in me, caught me off balance.” Stan replies, as he rubs his stomach. 

“Tosser.” Louis mumbles, when he looks at Harry. The taller boy rotates his wrists. 

“I’m fine, Lou. A bit shocked. But fine.” Harry says. “Let’s keep going.” 

“Ye sure?” Louis asks, “want me to kiss it better?” Harry giggles and scoots closer. Louis takes his hand, pushes the glove past his wrist and kisses the white skin. Harry stumbles a few feet to Oli, who helps him click his ski-boot back into the ski with shaky knees. 

“Thank you.” Harry says. Oli nods, his long nose as red as his hair. The ski much slower and more carefully than before. Nonetheless, Louis doesn’t believe Harry when he keeps telling him he’s fine. 

Back at the hotel, Harry takes off his gloves and his index finger looks awfully blue. “Shit, Haz!”

“It’s fine Louis!” Harry says, rolling his eyes in annoyance. “Just get me some ice from the reception.” 

“Baby, we ‘ave t’ get someone t’ look at it.” Louis says. Oli and Stan sneak looks over Louis’ shoulder. 

“I don’t want to.” Harry says like a child. “I want to stay here. I want to go into the sauna and the whirlpool. I want to stay here and have fun.” He pouts. Louis can feel irritation dancing under his skin. He wants nothing more than to belittle Harry like he would do with his little sisters. He feels like that wouldn’t go over well with Harry.

Louis rolls his eyes. “Go on then, get Harry some ice.” Oli says and kicks Louis in the bum to get him to move on.

“I’m really sorry, Harry.” Stan says worriedly. Harry waves it off. The swelling doesn’t go down. And as they all return from the sauna, where Louis embarrassingly popped a boner in front of his friends, they all slide on the balcony to share a blunt.

“No, weed makes me tired and sick.” Harry protests. 

“It’ll help with the pain.” Stan argues when he goes cross-eyed while sucking the toxic air into his lungs. 

Louis snaps his body around to him, “are ye ‘avin’ pain?” 

Harry rolls his eyes and pokes Louis cheek. “No. I’m fine.” He says, even though he does lean over to Stan and snubs his blunt. Louis watches his soft lips take a drag. He takes it off of him to allow the stale air to develop in his own mouth. “Anyone fancy a burger?” Agreeing calls surround Louis. While Oli and Stan finish the blunt, Louis helps Harry button his dress shirt inside their room. 

“Ye really should go t’ a doctor. I worry about ye.” Louis whispers, leaving a light kiss on his collarbone. 

“I will in the morning.” Harry says, partly to ease Louis’ conscience. “No doctors open now, are they?” 

“Right.” Louis says, when he’s kneeling to help Harry push his feet into the Chelsea boots. He kisses Harry’s groin, before standing to his feet. “Let’s get some food in ye.” He pats his tummy. Harry laughs.

“Hot and cold with you. I swear, one day I’ll just explode.” Harry says. 

“Don’t do tha’. I’m bad at gluing things back together.” Louis says, while they walk out into the hallway. At dinner, Louis finally pulls the plug when Harry can’t grab his burger. “That’s it, we’re goin’ t’ the hospital.” The other three grumble, but follow him to hollower a cab. Louis doesn’t trust his own car in the heavy snow. 

During the drive, the other two boys are being annoyingly giggly. They walk into the eerily white hospital. “Let me do this! Go sit down.” Stan says and swaggers up to the reception. It’s dark outside, and there is only one nurse on duty sitting at the desk, writing. Stan leans on top of it, hoisting his upper body over the desk. “Hello there. We ‘ave a problem.” Louis can hear him say, before he and the other two take a seat in the seating area.

“Mhm…” The nurse says. She looks up from her paper work. She cocks her head and stands up. She barely reaches above the desk. She’s tiny. “I see.” She leans forward, grabs Stan’s eyelid and opens it to stare into his eyes. “I know what you need. Come on.” She walks past the reception desk, grabs Stan’s hand and drags him to two heavy double doors.

“Oi.” Louis protests. Oli raises his hands and circles them like wheels. The nurse stops, walks over to them. 

She grabs Oli, “come on, you too!” 

“We’re here for him.” Louis says to her and points to Harry, but she doesn’t seem to hear him. It takes another 90 minutes until someone finally looks at Harry’s hand. “Very busy are ye?” Louis asks the young doctor annoyed. 

“Lots of broken bones.” The doctor says, while he stares at Harry’s finger from every vantage point. “I’m going to look at this under x-ray.” Louis scoffs.

“This goin’ t’ take another hour then?” 

“Louis, please. He’s trying to help.” Harry whisper-shouts. 

“Don’t worry I’m used to it. Best friend?” The doctor asks, while he hollers over an emergency nurse.

“Boyfriend.” Louis spits back. There’s a lot more he wants to say, like how he wants him to stop flirting with _his_ Harry. The boy in question gives him a warning glare.

“Right.” The doctor says. “Well, I’m going to ask you to wait here while we look at Mr. Styles’ hand.” Louis grunts annoyed and falls into a chair. 

“Where’s the one with curls?” Stan asks when he plops down next to Louis. 

“Ye sober again?” Louis asks, crossing his arms in front of his chest. He doesn’t let Stan answer, “fuckin’ doctor, stupid shit. Who the fock does he think he is?” Stan just stares at him confused. Louis throws his hands in the air, “tha’ tosser who’s patchin’ up Harry, he flirts with him. Stares at him like he’s a puff pastry.” 

Stan laughs, “there’s your puff pastry.” Louis looks over to see Harry reemerge. 

“Didn’t take too long for you?” The doctor asks. _And okay who the hell is he t’ say tha’_? 

“At least ye brought him back in one piece.” Louis retorts. Harry gives him another glare, before he sits back down on the examination table. The doctor has the audacity to chuckle. 

“Unlike you, you mean.” The doc says. _Tha’ is way too far!_ Louis is about to jump on the guys back like a monkey. Hit him on the head a couple of times and bite him until he bleeds out.

“What’s wrong with my finger?” Harry interjects. The doctor turns to the display, where the nurse squeezes the x-ray’s in. He studies them with raised eyebrows.

“Come on man, ye figuring out a puzzle or somethin’?” Louis asks him. The doctor just throws him an evil glare. 

“Your finger is broken Mr. Styles.” The doctor says with a disapproving click in his voice. Harry sags in disappointment. “The  swelling you saw happens because the tiny blood vessels in your finger have broken. Also, explains the purple colouring.” 

“What do we do now?” Harry asks defeated. Louis stands up and takes Harry’s uninjured hand into his, giving him a small squeeze in a show of support.

“Well, it’s good you put some ice on it when you did. Helped with the swelling. We will have to make a splint for you. You’re also lucky you didn’t break a finger, where you wear one of your beautiful rings. Wouldn’t want to cut them off.” The doctor winks at Harry. Louis’ hand balls into a fist above Harry’s thick thigh. Harry blushes. “Anyway, it’s a clean cut. It’ll take about 10 weeks to heal up. It will be fine.” 

“FINE? FINE? His bloody Finger is BROKEN!” Louis shouts. 

“Louis!” Harry says sharply, dropping the hand which was engulfing his. 

“Don’t worry, I’m not offended.” The doctor says sanctimoniously. “I suppose he’s just worried. Your finger please.” He stretches his open palm to Harry. Harry’s blue finger lands in the doctors large hand. Louis feels a little tug inside of him. Harry’s hand looks so small in the doctors, when he holds Louis’ hand he’s the bigger one. For some reason Louis can’t explain himself it makes him wonder if Harry appreciates Louis’ smaller form. He’s biting his lips trying to ease the pain his gut is putting him through, when a nurse steps up and helps the doctor applies a splint to Harry’s finger. 

“Can I still ski?” Harry asks the doctor, oblivious to Louis’ inner turmoil.

“Yes, you can. Although,” the doctor says smug. “I will have to implore you not to do it.”

“I understand.” Harry giggles. Louis looks away. 

“Good. You’re done. Easy-peasy right?” 

“Yes.” Harry says, happily.

“Here are some drugs in case you feel any more pain. And you’re good to go. Enjoy your stay at Nevis.” 

“Thank you, doc. Really thank you!” Harry says, hopping off the examination table. 

“You’re welcome.” He says and willingly shakes his hand.

“Yes,” Louis speaks out, anger curling inside his words. “Thank ye for doin’ yer job.” 

“I’m happy you have someone taking care of you Harry.” The doctor says, further infuriating Louis by using his first name.

“Let’s go Curly.” Louis grabs Harry’s wrist and pulls him into the hallway. Harry awkwardly waves at the doctor and nurse.

“Why are you being so rude to him?” Harry asks, once they found Oli and Stan. It’s snowing outside, and a puddle of it is already turning Louis black bomber jacket white.

“He was flirtin’ with ye! Had t’ mark me territory.” Louis says, while they find one lonesome cab parked outside. “God, this place is really dead, innit?” 

“Territory? Wha’ are ye, a dog?” Stan laughs, while he gets into the passenger side. 

“Fock off.” Louis says lamely, while Stan gives the driver the hotel address. He keeps pouting, even when Harry places his curly head on his shoulder and breathes against his neck. 

“Are you a bit jealous?” Harry whispers. Oli snorts, _great he heard._

“No.” Louis defends.

Harry giggles, “I’d always choose you!” 

“Do ye… do ye… ehm… do ye like tha’ I’m smaller than ye?” Louis asks, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible, but failing like a stutter-y mess. Harry sits up. The car comes to a stop, and they are forced to exit the car. It’s quiet when they get into the hotel. 

“Good night, lads.” Stan says before he opens the door to his room. Louis walks into his own. Without undressing, he walks out on their balcony. He allows his back to fall backwards against the cold stone. The fire from the lighter keeps blowing out. Louis lifts his shirt, and light the lighter beneath the shirt. He lights his cigarette and lifts his head to see Harry watching him. 

“That was hot.” Harry says, he’s only wearing a shirt and leans against the balcony door from the inside. Louis raises an eyebrow at him, but doesn’t say anything. Harry huffs, staring at the sky “you’re so stubborn.” Louis rolls his eyes. He hates hearing that. “I like that you’re smaller than me.” 

Louis turns to face him, he squishes the last half of the bud on the stone wall and steps up to Harry. He doesn’t even care he basically waisted an entire fag. “Really?” He doesn’t like how his insecurities shine through. He blinks his eyelashes and a few snowflakes fall off.

“Really. It’s like… how to say it…” Harry says, painfully drawing out his words. “You are so strong all the time. I feel like you always have the upper hand. And I’m just me. Just this bumbling mumbling mess, this stuttering clumsy giraffe. At least I’m taller than you. It’s the only time I have the upper hand.” Harry says so seriously it makes Louis throw his head back and laugh. Harry watches him in confusion. 

“So ye didn’t want t’ fuck the doc?” Louis asks, his eyes squished tighter in murph. 

“Never.” Harry says. “Not when I have you!” Louis leans down and kisses him. He shoves him backwards, taking the small step down into their room. Harry giggles into the kiss, “thank you by the way, for forcing me to go to the hospital.” 

“I love ye.” Louis says. “Couldn't stand seein’ yer finger all blue.” They fall on top of the bed in a giggling mess. Due to Harry’s broken finger, Louis only ends up giving Harry a hand job. His wrist hurts after tossing Harry off for the last ten minutes. “Go on Curly, come for me.” 

“Ngh..” Harry moans, and lifts his hips towards the roof, effectively helping Louis get him off. “I’m close, Lou!” 

“Come princess.” Louis says, pepping a few kisses against Harry’s nipple. With a loud ‘LOUIS!” Harry spurts all over his own chest. “Good boy.” Louis says and keeps diddling Harry’s balls until they are completely empty. Harry’s left leg twitches against Louis’ side when it becomes painful. He turns Harry on to his side and snuggles up behind him. “Good night, Hazza.” 

“Good night, darling.” Harry says. “Louis?” 

“Wha’?” He asks, he had almost dozed off. 

“Do you think we’ll ever get married?” Harry asks, playing with one of Louis’ fingers. 

“Sure, why not?” Louis says, closing his eyes against Harry’s back.

“You don’t sound too enthusiastic.” Louis can hear him pout.

“Harry, I saw me mum go through two divorces and step into a third.” It’s all he can say right now, the depth of his fear ringing inside his own ears too loud. 

“But she still believes.” Harry argues. “She still thinks it’s a sanctuary for the ones of true love.” 

“Tha’s a nice way of puttin’ it.” Louis says. “Harry, if we’re still together in a few years, I’ll pop down on one knee, heck I’ll go down on both knees, and ask, okay?”

“Really?” Harry sounds too excited. 

“Yes, really. Now sleep.” Louis yawns. His entire arm is already buzzing with goosebumps from Harry’s soft touch.

“Okay. But I don’t want to call you husband. I think the word spouse sounds soooo nice.” Harry coos. 

“Sure.” Louis laughs into his neck, “won’t mind either way.” He kisses his shoulder and closes his eyes once more.

💚🍑💙

They manage to squeeze Harry’s fat finger into his skiing glove with some improvising. Louis cuts off the finger from the glove so the splint sticks out of the glove. To keep Harry’s exposed finger warm, they rap a cut sleeve from Louis’ shirt around it. Stan cheers when it’s a go. Harry makes an executive order only to use easy slopes. They end up using the gondola all the way to the summit top. Louis tries to stay behind Harry again, who is skiing a little less skilfully, since he doesn’t have the best grip on his ski stick today. They use the spider slope, then ski the Duncan’s drop and skip all the way across with the Alpha Traverse. They end up at a tiny restaurant where they can stuff their faces and go back up just after one. 

They call it quits a little early in the hopes of using the Spa Area. “Oi, Tommo.” Stan whispers, when they all pile into the elevator. 

“Wha’?” He asks, while he carefully holds Harry’s injured hand. 

“Want t’ get some booze?” He whispers. Louis grins. Oli and Harry, _those wimps_ , ride the elevator all the way down to the spa area, while Louis and Stan step out at ground level. “So ye and Curly, that’s going well, aye?” 

“Aye.” Louis smiles. “Gave me a heart attack with his stupid finger.” 

Stan chuckles, “yeah, tha’ looked bloody awful.” They walk up to the bar in their bathrobes and order a few beer bottles, preferably uncapped. “Ye fuck him yet?” 

“Mate.” Louis presses his hands into his eye-sockets. 

“Sorry, sorry.” Stan laughs, and takes the beers from the bartender who eyes them suspiciously. When they arrive in the spa area, Louis finds Harry half asleep on the sun bed. His book had slipped to the floor. 

He wakes him up by placing a cold beer against his cheek, “wake-y, wake-y, baby.” Harry twitches awake under him.

“Oh-h, thank you.” He smiles and takes the beer into his hand.

“Thought ye don’t drink beer.” Oli mocks Harry. 

“Didn’t bring me anything else, did you?” Harry retorts.

“Nope. Sorry. We were tryin’ t’ be inconspicuous.” Stan shrugs.

“Knowing you two, I’m pretty sure you failed.” 

“Oi, I got mad skills.” Louis says. 

“Sure ye do.” Oli laughs and winks. A woman in a white suit walks up to them and coughs into her hand to make herself noticeable. The boys, totally unsuccessful, try to hide the beer behind their backs. “Yes?”

“Mr. Styles, we have an opening for an ayurveda-treatment if you’d like to jump in.” 

“I’d love to. Thank you.” 

“Good. I’ll jot you down. It’s in an hour.” 

“Cheers.” Stan jells. She blinks at him irritated, and then gives him a stern look towards his beer. The nurse turns on her heel rather fast and walks away with a jiggle in her bum. “Check out the bangers on her.” 

“Hey!” Harry hits him against the arm, “we don’t objectify women.” Stan holds up his hands in defence, spilling a bit of his beer over his crotch. Harry giggles at him.

“Whirlpool?” Harry is the first on his feet, shaking his tiredness out of his curls. He’s wearing painfully tight yellow trunks. Louis licks his lips when he follows the taller boy to the whirlpool. There’s another couple in there, but they soon leave when the boys water fight gets too much for them. Afterwards, Harry insists on the sauna. Louis watches him take off his cute yellow trunks and walk stark naked into the sauna room. Stan and Oli watch him with mouths agape. 

“Stop staring at him!” Louis gives both a clap on the back of the head. 

“Ow… I’m just sayin’ got a lot of nerve yer bloke.” Oli shakes his head. “Don’t like being naked in public.”

“It’s impressive.” Stan agrees, as they enter behind Harry. He’s already lying on one of the benches, his soft cock lying against his left thigh. Louis sighs when he sits down close to him, still in his own trunks. His best mates from home try to look anywhere but at Harry. “So dinner? Any ideas?” Stan asks awkwardly. 

“Well we tried yer Japanese stuff and the burgers. We could try the Italian, supposed to be right around the corner.” Oli says, closing his eyes. Louis does much the same. Allowing the warm air seep into his bones, and brush off the freezing cold air from the mountain. He’s always bloody cold, it was death for him up so high. 

Harry stays in the spa area to get his massage, while Louis walks upstairs. He has another hot shower, which makes his skin so deliciously pink. He puts on some clothes for the night out and waits for his boyfriend to come back. Louis opens his phone to listen to the voicemails his mother left him, after she heard from Anne (“Really Louis? I had to find out through Anne?”) about the hospital visit. He starts typing out a reply on his WhatsApp message to his mother, when with a loud thud the room door closes. Belated Louis looks up, Harry is swaying his hips and humming to himself. His eyes are firmly closed. Harry slips the bathrobe off of his shoulders and kicks it with his foot to the end of the bed. Louis looks at his boyfriend as if he has never seen him in his life. This self-forgotten face, the hair glued backwards, this lascivious movement as he stepped out of the bathrobe. The oil on his white skin glistered slightly bronze. His cock stands at half-mast between his long slippery skin. 

Louis’ finger’s twitch wanting to touch him. Harry sees him at the same moment. After a second of fright, his eyes get caught on Louis jumping index finger on the bed post. Harry grins, self-confidence comes back in full force when he silently slid towards Louis. He picks Louis’ hand from the bedpost. With a butter-soft touch, he guides his hand over his body. Louis’ breath caught in his throat when Harry slides his fingertips across his chest, from nipple to nipple. The oil eases the way for him. His fingernail gets caught on the tiny hairs on his pleasure trail. Louis bites his lips, as if this were their first time they played together. Excitedly, Louis moans when Harry coaxes his oily hand around his cock. “God, Harry you’re so fucking hot.” Louis breaks the silence. He holds his breath hoping he didn’t break this eerie dream. Then Harry mules, head thrown back enjoying his touch.

“I want you to be my first Lou!” Harry moans, his green eyes sparkling when he looks at Louis’ hooded dark blues.  “You’re the _first_ man that _I_ want, you’re the _only_ man I _ever_ wanted.” Harry bends down and kisses him, “and you’re the _first_ and _only_ man who I want inside me.” 

Louis jumps up to stand in front of him, “the only?” Harry giggles and snuggles up to him. With a strong jerk he rips open Louis’ shirt. The buttons fly to all sides. _Doesn't matter_ , Louis thinks, _it’s oily now anyway_. Harry is already caressing himself against his bare chest, and Louis forgets the shirt. The feeling of his soft shimmed skin on his was unimaginable. He rubs himself against him, up and down, their nipples get caught on each other, and sparks twinkle into his cock. “Mmhm,” Louis moans. “Harry ye feel amazing.” 

Harry grabs his button and pushes his pants over his bum. He lifts his leg and hooks it around his hip. Louis watches as Harry jerks his pants down with his toes. “You feel pretty amazing too, blue.” 

“Harry, please, let me touch ye.” Louis whines. Harry bites his lip, watching him with large pupils. He nods once. Louis grabs onto his bum, lifting him, so he can sling his legs around his waist. His skin is slippery, and he can’t get a good hold on the boy. Harry lets his feet plop down on the ground, once he’s slipped down so far he was almost at eye level with Louis’ nipples. 

“Oops.” Harry giggles. Louis laughs, kicks his pants off, and grabs Harry’s waist to squish them against each other.

“At least we ‘ave enough lube.” Louis mumbles against Harry’s lips before his kisses him open-mouthed. Harry’s hand grips onto Louis’ biceps. 

“Louis, please take me.” Harry says heatedly into his skin. “Please.” 

“Yes… yes… definitely, get on the bed love.” Harry nods feverishly, and settles on the bed with his back on the sheets. “Settle in,” Louis tells him. “Don’t worry about the sheets.” Louis reads his mind. 

“Okay.” Harry says and wiggles his bum into the blanket. His cock bobs in the air, while Louis steps out of his briefs. 

“Ye look lovely.” Louis says, while he climbs on the bed. 

“Condoms?” Harry asks quietly, his nervous are back. Louis places kisses from his ankle up his legs, bypasses his cock and comes face to face with Harry’s trembling lips.

Louis clears his throat, when he takes a seat between Harry’s long legs. His hands roam over his strong thighs. “Ye knaw, I really will ‘ave t’ thank Liam for makin’ ye work out.” 

“I really like it, though. Frees my mind, like footie does with you!” Harry says, his eyes trailing all over Louis’ features.

“Hm…” Louis says, “makes ye look buff.” 

“Cheers.” Harry says. Louis laughs, and watches as Harry’s eyes fall on Louis’ cock. It’s standing proud and pink against his stomach. Harry blushes from his want. Louis leans forward and kisses him. He slants his head to the left and opens his mouth to allow their tongues to twirl against each other. He runs his hands over his body. He immediately lays over him, his hands and mouth wandering down. Kisses him, sometimes he presses with his hands so hard that Harry’s body curls, it produces a peculiar tingling in his lap. “Louis, please. More.” 

Louis looks up, grabs for lube on the bedside table and pours a large amount on his fingers. His eyes catch Harry, who nervously bites his lips. Louis hasn’t fingered him in a while, only that one time. Louis gives him another kiss, “relax.” Harry nods, one oily curl falling into his eyes. Louis’ finger grazes his bum-hole.Harry releases a shaky breath when his finger glides over his hole. His finger slips into him. Louis watches Harry’s face go into bliss when he starts wiggling his finger. “Ye okay?” 

“Y-ye-s.” Harry moans. Louis chuckles and connects their lips again. His skin smells lightly like vanilla and the oil spread all the way between his bum cheeks. Louis quickly adds another finger, and Harry’s face draws his eyebrows together in pain at first. 

“Sorry.” Louis whispers, and kisses his nipples to ease the pain. It seems to work since Harry’s erection bobs again. “I’m too eager,” he quickly says.

“Lou, another finger.” Harry moans, and wiggles, riding Louis’ finger inside of himself. Louis sucks harder on his nipple and carefully adds his finger, scissoring him open. “Oh, Lou! Oh, Lou! I won’t last! Bullocks.” Harry moans. 

“Ye look perfect like this.” Louis retracts his finger and leans over to grab the condom box on the bedside table. Harry uses his right leg and pokes Louis with his foot into his chest. “Wha’?” 

Harry grins sly, hoists his hips up, encases Louis’ hips with his legs and rolls them. Sitting on top of Louis, he grabs some access oil off his body, rubs his hands, and then he spoils him. Louis, who was about to protest, gasps and sinks back, caught in ecstasy. _Now he has him._ But not for long.

He encloses him in his strong arms again and pushes Harry, with a yelp, on his back. “Stop, babe. Ye don’t want me t’ come before I’m inside ye, do ye?”

“Definitely not.” Harry says, agreeing with him with big almost black eyes. Louis’ fingers slip over the condom package. The nervous trembling in his hand and the oil on his hands make it impossible to open the bloody thing. He swears under his breath. Harry, who had been touching himself watching Louis, rolls his eyes and grabs the package from him. He lifts it to his lips and bares his tiny rabbit teeth into the package, ripping it open. 

“Skilful.” Louis chuckles, Harry only licks his lips. Louis reaches out for the package, but Harry is already sitting up. He places it on Louis’ cock, and Louis watches as Harry, with his bottom lip between his teeth, slips it over his hard erection. Louis feels himself twitch. He looks at Harry’s large hands, his cute teeth, his sinful lips, the sleeked-back curls. He’s having an epiphany. “Haz…” He grabs Harry’s chin lifting it. “Love…” Harry cocks his head to the side with a surprise small lipped smile. “Ye are everything. Me anchor. Me world.” Harry raises an eyebrow, but Louis dips down to kiss him. He leans over him and pushes him back against the pillow. 

Louis realises Harry from the kiss. He spreads Harry’s thighs, where he had tried to circle his waist again. All he sees is green. This is the most intimate feeling he’s ever had. He keeps staring into his soul, when he grabs his cock and guides it towards Harry’s entrance. He gives it a last swipe as a warning. Harry is holding his breath and grabs Louis’ biceps. His fingertips bare into Louis’ skin, and Louis sees this as agreement. Slowly he pushes in. Harry makes a little, “hahh..” It’s a very breathy little surprise. Louis bites his lips, _he’s sooo bloody tight! Fuck! Alright, breathe Tomlinson. Go Slow. Don’t ruin this for him!_ He gives Harry time to adjust every time he pushes further into him. Harry leaves a loud ‘Oh’, when Louis bottoms out. His balls pressed against Harry’s cheeks. “How… how do I feel?” Harry asks, his eyes wide in anticipation.

“Good. Bloody hell, ye feel amazin’.” Louis moan. The tight heat is killing him! This is nothing compared to Eleanor whose body was glad to allow him in. Harry giggles a laugh. “Are ye okay? I’m not hurtin’ ye, am I?”

“No… it’s a bit of a stretch.” Harry informs, “but it feels good. Like really good.” He blushes. 

“Tell me when ye’re ready.” Louis says. Harry’s hands release his biceps and circle around his upper body. Hands firmly locked on the small of Louis’ back and his bum, Harry gives him a nod. Louis pulls out, relief flushes him and goes back in. Harry makes an ‘ah’ sound. Louis happens to love that sound, so he repeats the notion, getting faster and harder with every thrust. Until Harry is a stutter-y begging mess. Exposing himself completely bare to Louis. Louis can almost see his orgasm approaching in his inner eye. 

“OH Louis! Wait… slow down… oh slow down.” 

“Did I hurt ye?” Louis asks, getting out of his haze and locking eyes again.

“No!” Harry breathes, air fanning all over Louis face. “I want you to slow down and enjoy it more.” 

“Cheeky.” Louis says. He gently places a kiss on his lips, “we fit perfectly together baby.” His hips start rotating back into Harry’s body. 

“FUCK!” Harry screams. Louis thinks he hears ringing in his ear. “LOUIS! What was that?! Oh God, do it again.” 

“Ah…” Louis smirks in confidence. “Tha’, me love, was yer prostate. The male G-spot. Want me t’ do it again?” He chuckles when Harry nods enthusiastically. 

“Yes, Louis please. Please do it again.” Harry begged, and Louis repeated the notion again, hitting Harry’s prostate. Harry’s eyes roll back into his head, and he throws his curls back. He moans loudly, while Louis sucks on his neck and repeats, and repeats, and repeats the notion for him. Louis’ hand fixes on Harry’s hip, pressing it down, while Harry seems to ruck up the bed more and more.

Harry’s hips move almost automatically, circling his thighs around Louis, and meeting his thrusts. Letting go of his cock and pulling him back in hard. But soon Harry gives up. He lets himself summit to his lust, which shakes him to the core. “I’m close,” Harry groans.

Louis rams him like a raging man, his muscles cramp. Harry’s fingernails dug into his hard buttocks. “Me too…” Louis roars in ecstasy and fills his condom. Harry gasps, and comes all over his stomach. Both slacken. Louis kisses him once more and carefully grabs the base of his cock to pull out of Harry. Harry moans when Louis’ cock leaves him. Loui collapses next to him. They lie next to each other breathing hard. “Fuck, that was good!” Harry says. 

Louis laughs, “thanks.” 

“Not saying it to boost your enormous ego.” Harry chuckles and yawns into the back of his hand. Louis sits up, throws the condom on the bedside table. “EW.” Harry says, eyes already hooded. 

“I’ll clean it later,” Louis mumbles and positions Harry to curl around him. Harry falls asleep immediately and Louis listens to him breathe against his collarbone. He waits for Harry to start talking again and allows his eyes to close. The world outside dipping into darkness as the night comes. 

They both startle awake when a blaring phone vibrates on one of the bedside tables. “Who the fock is tha’?” Louis mumbles and reaches for his phone. Harry won’t let go of him, his hands holding him steady against himself. “‘ello?” 

“Mate, where are ye? Bein’ waitin’ fockin' ages, lad.” Oli calls through the speakers. “We’re bloody hungry!” 

“Oh!” Louis says and looks down at Harry. He’s watching him with green eyes peaking through the flutter of his eyelashes. “Harry and I will stay in. Just go without us. We’re orderin’ in.” 

He can hear Stan laugh, “finally fucked him, did ye?” 

“Good night, lads.” Louis says with an eye-roll. He will not dignify it with a response. He hangs up and kisses Harry’s forehead. “Wha’ now, love?” 

“We never got clean, shower?” Harry asks and leaves a kiss on his chest.

“Yes.” 

“You still need to clean away that condom.” Harry says, disgust still written all over his cute face. Louis rolls his eyes. 

“Hey wait, wha’ do ye want from in-door dining?” Louis pulls out the little menu, and they decide together on some fish and chips, ice tea, sausage muffin with egg, chocolate milkshake and hash browns.Harry drags Louis into the bathroom. The water pearls off of Harry’s still oily body. Harry grabs Louis’ cock and starts massaging him again. 

“Again?” Louis asks chuckling. Harry shrugs, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. Louis pulls another condom over his cock, grabs Harry’s thighs and lifts him against the cold tiles. Water is raining down on them from three different sides. Harry’s body is still slithery. It’s easy slipping back into Harry. He throws his head back and claws at Louis’ shoulders. 

Louis keeps up a punishing pace, until Harry exclaims, “differently… diff…erent.” 

“Wha’?” Louis asks. Harry slips of his cock and turns around. Louis stares at his strong muscled back and shoulder-blades. “Fuck, baby…” Louis runs a hand from his shoulder along his spine and grabs a handful of his cheek. Louis spreads him.

“Hurry up!” Harry moans, wiggling his bum. Water runs down his back and in between his cheeks. Louis slips back in and fucks him. Harry leans back against his chest. His head falls against Louis’ shoulder, and he comes for what feels like an entire minute against the tiles. His orgasm clamps down on Louis’ cock. Shortly Louis’ vision goes black, and he comes from the glorious sight in front of him. “That was bloody fantastic.” Harry gasps, his face still in the stream of water. “Fuck, Louis. I came so incredibly hard.” Louis chuckles and holds him up while he frees his cock from the latex. 

“Soap and food?” Louis asks. Harry flops to the floor of the shower and nods. Louis chuckles again when he grabs the hotel shampoo to lather Harry up.

💚🍑💙

Louis can feel the wind around his face, while his feet drum down on the pitch. He’s back at practice with his team, running laps. His mind is elsewhere. The day after they had come back home, Louis had done a double shift at Bell’s fish and chips store. At noon Harry had come in and set down on one of the sticky tables and pulled out some books with his laptop. The lads from the shop poked and prodded Louis about his ‘weird’ friendship with Harry and Louis wanted, oh so desperately, to tell them all the truth. Instead, he got Harry his salad and a wink.

“TOMMO!” Coach calls over the pitch. Louis bee-lines to him when he waves him over. 

“Wha’s up?” Louis asks, brushing an arm over his forehead. 

“What’s wrong with you?” Winston asks him. 

“Nothin’.” Louis shakes his head. 

“Watching you is extremely painfully high now.”Winston says, placing his balled up fists on his hips, “I literally feel my eyes burn.” 

Louis frowns, “tha’s quite rude, coach.” He cocks his own hip.

“Go home.” Coach says, throwing his hands in the air, “I might vomit watching you.” 

“I don’t think tha’s quite warranted.” Louis says back. He has no intention of leaving. 

“Go home.” Coach tells him. “I’m doing this for you, Tomlinson. Take a break. Think and come back tomorrow.” 

Louis huffs and opens his mouth to retort, but Winston already walks off. Louis is fuming when he gets to the locker room. He screams when he smashes his locker closed. The sound rings in the small room, when he sits down on the bench. “How did this happen?” Louis asks. He strips off his cleats and his shin-guard. He doesn’t bother to shower, he craves to see Harry and feel his soothing presence around himself. 

He parks his car in Harry’s driveway, before he walks up to the house. Louis’ about to knock when he hears too many voices behind the door. He rounds the front of the house, and he notices the kitchen door open. Louis silently slips into the house, where he sees where the ruckus is coming from. “These look great Harry.” Harry’s back is turned to him. A bloated man is standing next to him with a hand on the small of Harry’s back. A hand way too close to his bum, Louis feels. They are both looking down at something on the table in front of him. But all of that wasn’t that important, if Louis hadn’t recognised the voice. His management teacher Mr. Cowell was currently hovering next to _his_ boyfriend!

Louis felt his breath catch in his throat just like the first time he had seen the two talking together in the school hallway. “I think you got a stunner here, mate. Well done, Simon.” Another familiar voice says. 

“Oh, my boy!” Anne giggles, giving Harry a few kisses on his cheek. 

“Good to have you back in the game my friend.” Clive Calder steps up to Cow-hell and shakes his hand. _No, No, No…wha’ do they all ‘ave to do with me Harry_? He spins around and walks out the door. Thankfully no one had seen him yet. He steps up to the vine and starts pulling himself up. 

“Hey! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?” Louis looks over his shoulder to see Harry’s nosy neighbour standing in his front garden. 

“Nice slippers, mate. Got some matchin’ knickers?” Louis calls over his shoulder and opens the window on the first floor. He tumbles when he falls into the room. Louis quickly makes his way into Harry’s room and snuggles his cold body into a throw-blanket. Louis doesn’t count the minutes, but it takes Harry a while until he finally appears. He squeals when he sees Louis half asleep on his bed. 

“My God Louis! Start using the door!” Harry says, but his face is split into a large grin. Happiness surrounds him like a cloud. He walks over to Louis and plants a kiss in greeting to his lips. 

“Why are Cow-hell and Calder here?” Louis retorts. 

“You saw that?” Harry asks, suddenly very interested in his own hands.

“Clearly.” Louis says coldly.

“I know you don’t like them much.” Louis snorts. “But they arranged the gallery opening for me.” 

“Both of them?” Louis asks.

“Simon helped me and talked to Clive, who knows the gallery owner. They put me up with him, so I can showcase my work. It’s really cool! Please, Louis be happy for me.” 

“Simon?” Louis sits up, staring at the side of Harry’s face.

“Yeah?” Harry says, peaking a look at him. “Simon… you know… Simon Cowell.” 

“Cowell’s first name is Simon?” 

“Yeah!” Harry says, openly staring at Louis now. “Louis, why?” 

“He’s uncle Simon?” Louis asks himself. The moments where he was in Eleanor’s house playing in front of his eyes, every time she mentioned her uncle Simon. An uncle who was more a friend of her fathers than family. Who came by for Easter and Christmas. 

“I’m sorry, who is uncle Simon?” Harry asks confused.

“Ye really trust these guys?” Louis asks, shaking himself free from the memories. 

“Yes. They are helping me.” Harry pouts. 

“Stop pouting.” Louis says, “honest love. I don’t trust either of with anything.” 

“Don’t ruin this for me.” Harry says, disappointedly looking down at his hands. “Please.” Louis takes in a deepbreath, _remain calm._

“He hates me. Both of them do.” Louis says. 

Harry looks up, eyes fierce, “then maybe you should try harder!” Louis scoffs.

“Wha’ spring up their bum like ye?” Louis barks. Harry’s eyes fill with tears.

“This is something I’m doing for ME!” Harry jumps up from the bed, taking advantage of standing a foot taller than Louis. “ME, Louis. And you’re my boyfriend, be on MY FUCKING SIDE!” 

“Pardon did ye just swear?” Louis says, he can’t help himself.

“Bugger off.” Harry says, turning around and staring into his driveway from his window. 

“The only time I ever heard ye swear I was balls deep inside of ye.” Louis chuckles.

“Don’t be so crass.” Harry says while pulling at his locks. Louis stands up and comes to a stop behind Harry. He carefully takes his hand into his. 

“I don’t want t’ fight either, alright?” Louis says. “I just… I feel protective of ye. I don’t want no one to hurt ye.” Harry looks down at him. “I am supporting ye with yer dream, I promise. Just don’t want people takin’ advantage of ye on the way.” 

“This is an excellent way for me to show my work for the first time.” Harry says weakly.

“Okay… okay.” Louis says and grabs Harry by the middle. He steps on his tiptoes to brush their lips together. The kiss doesn’t last long.

“Ehmm… Lou?” 

“Yeah, wha’?” Louis asks. Harry eyes are trained on the window, so Louis turns confused. There’s blue light running circles in the driveway. “Tha’ fockin’ neighbour of yers. I swear, I will kill him.”

“What did you do Louis?” Harry asks, a slightly amused shiver in his voice.

“I should head out.” Louis says, “before your mum has to talk to those dipshits.” Harry follows him downstairs, holding tight to Louis’ hand. His finger is still in a splint, and Louis has to work around it. The doorbell rings. Harry stiffens a bit behind Louis. He turns to the taller boy and gives him a heated kiss, before he turns to the door. 

“Evening miss.”

“Oh My God, did something happen? Did someone get hurt? Is it Harry? Is it Gemma? Oh my god. Robin? Did something happen to my husband?” Anne starts panicking.

“No nothing like that, Mam.” The police officer says. “We got a call from one of your neighbours, who saw someone climb into your window.” 

“Excuse me?” Anne says, completely baffled.

“Don’t worry about tha’.” Louis says, squeezing past a surprised Anne. “Was only me.” He grins and hops towards the car.

“Sir, stop.” 

“You leave him be!” Anne strongly says. “He was visiting my son. Yes, stop looking like that Frank! My son, Harry, you do remember him, don’t you? You have to since this is an awfully small town, and we have been living here quite some time. You know the one who is gay. And I am proud of that.” Louis stopped in his tracks to turn and look at the display. “Now I’d hate to think that you are persecuting a young man simply because he was trying to sneak a few minutes in with his friend. So take your homophobic bullshit elsewhere!” She makes a sho-notion. 

“This isn’t about that Anne, and you know it.” Frank says. 

“Stop.” Anne says, finger raised. “I’m not pressing charges, so get the fuck off my property FRANK!” Anne holds out her hand towards Louis, “come here love.” Louis quickly hurries to her side, while the officers walk back to their car. 

“You’re not doing anything?” The neighbour is back, staring at the police in schock. 

“BACK OFF! STAY ON YOUR OWN BLOODY PROPERTY LINE!” Anne screams at him. 

“Wow,” Louis says and whistles through his teeth. “Anne, you’re such an iconic queen.” 

“Oh.” Anne blushes, and brushes her hair back, much like her son does. “Thank you. Muffins?” 

“I…” He points to his car, but he sees Harry nervously biting his bottom lip. “Sure. Just one, though. Or ye’ll ‘ave t’ roll me across the pitch next weekend.” 

Anne lets out a clear laugh, “won’t that be a sight.”

“Why didn’t ye tell me uncle Simon is Cow-hell? Why didn’t ye tell me ye are basically family with the devil?” Louis smashes his heavy books onto the desk in front of Eleanor.

“Psst.” The librarian echoes. Louis looks up to give her a pointed ‘come on, this is way more important’ look. Several faces are looking into his direction, studying long forgotten. 

“Honestly, I thought you knew. It’s not a secret.” Eleanor says, worry written all over her face. “Why are you asking me this?” She whispers.

“He’s the one gettin’ Harry his gallery openin’. I don’t want him to get hurt, El.” Louis says and sags into a chair across from her.

“He’s working again?” Eleanor asks. “That is surprising, he almost went to prison for the stuff he did to that boy band.” 

“Really?” Louis says, a bad feeling pooling into his gut. “Oh, Harreh, wha’ did ye get yerself into?” 

“Dramatic much?” Eleanor giggles. “I’ll ask my father what Simon is doing if you want. Maybe I can figure out his angle.” 

“Good idea.” Louis nods. “What would ye think about the idea of gettin’ a few people to H’s openin’, so he has options.” 

“Options?” 

“Yeah, like he can say thanks for makin’ the gallery happen, but I met this awesome bloke there who is willin’ t’ help me out. So I don’t need ye no more, ye fucker.” 

“Grand!” Eleanor says sarcastically. “Yeah you try that. I’m pretty sure Harry isn’t looking for a manager.” 

“Just keepin’ his options open.” Louis says, already ordering his thoughts in his mind.

“Jeez Lou.” Eleanor leans forward and stares at him, “you really are a good boyfriend, you know?” Louis looks up proudly, grinning like a fool. 

A few days later, Louis is nervously sitting on a tiny stool wiggling his leg in a doctor’s office. “Why are ye so nervous?” Jay chuckles next to him.

“Ye serious, do ye see all these vaginas?” Louis asks pointing around himself. “Why am I here and not Dan?” 

“He has a work emergency, besides I want to have a few moments with my son.” She rubs her hand over her belly. 

“What’s he doin’? He inventin’ a new mouth guard?” Louis asks bored.

“LOUIS!” Jay shakes her head, nonetheless she’s also laughing to herself. Louis grins, _objective accomplished._

“Good day Mrs. Deakin.” A super cheerful voice enters Louis ear. His mother’s gynaecologist, a young woman with a crooked nose and dark straight hair. “Oh, a new face then?” 

“This is my oldest. Louis.” Jay punches her elbow into Louis’ ribs. Louis coughs, breath caught in his throat. 

“Hi…” he wheezes out.

“Good, well, hop on Mrs. Deakin. You know the procedure.” She says excitedly. Jay sits down on the bed and pulls up her shirt.

“Is it normal tha’ she’s bigger than usual?“ Louis asks. “Not tryin’ t’ be rude. Mum, ye look gorgeous. But I can’t remember her being this big with any of the others.” 

“Hmmm…” The gynaecologist says. Louis rolls his eyes at being ignored. He steps up to his mother and takes her hand into his. She smiles. Louis grins when he sees the tiny monitor. He’s got quite good at reading the pictures. 

“Ye sure it’s not a boy?” Louis asks.

“Louis, please.” Jay tuts. 

The doctor chuckles. Louis takes a look at the picture, “it’s just for the longest time we thought me sister, Felicite, was a boy until she was not.” The gynaecologist hums again and starts vigorously changing angles. “Sorry, is there soemthin’ wrong?” Louis asks, he’s getting a bit fed up with this one.

She stays concentrated on the monitor, “I’m sure the baby is female.” She says. “I want to use the heart monitor. I’m having a little suspicion.”

“A bad one?” Jay pipes up.

“Depends on your point of view.” She says and grabs the other stick dangling from the monitor. “This is the heart monitor.” She explains, “okay let’s have a listen.” Louis squeezes his mother’s hand, which started trembling. Both breathe a sigh of relief when the strong fluttery heart beat sounds like small drums through the room. 

“Oh, they are okay.” Jay says, closing her eyes in relief.

The doctor zips around, “what did you say? They?” 

“Oh, yeah. My son likes to keep their pronounce mutual. Just in case they pop out as a different gender.” Jay says, poking Louis’ cheek. Louis tries to swat her away. 

“Oh okay.” She says, her eyebrows creased.

“I’m sorry, but ye are scarin’ me mum.” Louis says, defensiveness pulling back into his voice. 

“I don’t want that!” The gynaecologist tries to say. “But I do want you to listen and tell me if this sounds different from before.” She says. “This is one heartbeat.” She moves it around. The monitor makes a few ugly crackling noises, before suddenly a heartbeat drums in the room.

“Wait wha’?” Louis asks. His mother’s eyes go tennis-ball wide, and she presses her mouth over her agape mouth. 

“Congratulations, Mrs. Deakin. You are having twins.” 

“How is it possible for ye not to ‘ave seen this?” Louis asks, accusatorial. 

“One of them was hiding behind the other.” She says with a big smile to Jay.

“Oh God, what is Dan going to say?” Jay says.

“Two is better than one?” Louis grins. She swats his arm, but giggles into her hand. 

“Are they identical then?” She asks.

The gynaecologist blushes, “ehm… no. See the little line here, that’s the two foetus’ separated by the eggs.” 

“Oh, thank God.” Louis says. The women turn to him with cocked eyebrows. “Just thinkin’ of the other twins. Daisy and Phoebe would be livid if they weren’t the only identical ones in the family. It’s their key identifier.” The two women in the room look at each other and shrug their shoulders. 

💚🍑💙

“Not this one. Not this one. Not this one.” Lottie says, while she throws one shirt after another over her shoulder. Louis and Harry share a panicky look.

“Lotts, wha’ are ye doin’ in me room?” Louis groans and shifts deeper into the heavy blankets. He tries to shift on his bum. Harry took his time last night to eat him out slowly. He could still feel the stretch and briefly wondered how Harry could take Louis’ cock up his ass.“Just lookin’ for something.” 

“But I don’t want it!” Fizzy says. She’s standing next to her sister, who is currently head deep in Louis’ closet.

“Trust me, ye do!” Lottie argues. “Aha!” She pulls out one of Louis very tight button up shirts. 

“Oh, I like that one.” Harry says, who is sitting next to Louis. His naked upped body is leaning against Louis’ make-shift headboard. He blinks dreamily, “clings to his body so well.”

“Oh baby.” Louis grins at Harry. Harry smiles down at him, leaning over his entire body to give him a kiss. 

“Come on then put it on.” Lottie says.

“I really don’t think I need tha’.” Fizzy says. 

“Fizzy, ye can’t very well go in a baggy pullover!” Lottie argues. “Up and off.” Louis shivers a little, Lottie does have such a demanding voice.

“Fine.” She pulls the jumper off. Louis realises why she didn’t want to, she is a little thicker around the middle than the rest of his siblings. “See,” Fizzy calls out. “That’s why I don’t wear crop tops!” 

“I think you’re beautiful.” Harry says out of breath. Louis kicks him under the bedsheet. If there is anything he learnt about living with his sisters it is to let them fight their own battles. 

Fizzy turns to him, placing her fist on her hips, “seriously?” 

“I think you look wonderful.” Harry sounds a little offended.

“Shut it and put it on!” Lottie orders. 

Louis groans loudly, “argh… go somewhere else.” 

“No.” Harry says and tries to untangle himself from the blankets. Just as he is about to free himself and step up to the girls, he seems to remember he’s in fact naked. He quickly jumps back on the bed, pressing the many blankets, which were only there because Louis was always so bloody cold, to his crotch. “You look beautiful. You really really do! Just because you don’t look like your sister doesn’t mean you aren’t beautiful okay!” Louis looks up to see, in his astonishment, Fizzy is nodding at him with one tear clearly glistering in her eye. He hooks his ankle below Harry’s in thanks. “This guy you’re dressing up for asked you out because he likes you for you!” 

Louis bolts upright, almost pulling the sheets off Harry. “Guy? Ye goin’ on a date?” 

“What else would she get dressed up for?” Lottie rolls her eyes, “really Louis use yer head.” She tuts and turns to Fizzy, who is busy buttoning up her shirt. 

“I’ll ‘ave t’ check him out! Can’t go out with just anyone.” Louis says, more to his hand than to her. He’s trying to figure out how to do all of that with only a few hours to match.

“Ye will do no such thing!” Fizzy warns. He looks back up. 

“Wow. Ye look stunnin’.” Louis says. His shirt hugs her just right around her breasts, and leaves her stomach flat. 

“Thanks.” She says, and Louis barely believes his eyes when he sees her blush just in the slightest. 

“You never call me stunning.” Harry pouts, and Louis turns around to him.

“Sure I do.” 

“No, you always say gorgeous and beautiful. Sometimes cute. But never stunning.” Harry says. 

“Oh God,” Lottie theatrically says, “let’s leave this gay den.” 

“Oi. Watch yer words, young one.” Louis calls after her, when she and her sister leave. He turns around to Harry who is still pouting. “Come off it.” Louis chuckles, “I’ll make a mental note t’ call ye tha’ soon.” He slips off the bed and slightly gasps when he feels the little tinge in his bum, where Harry’s fingers had spread him a bit.

“I think you’re stunning.” Harry says. Louis turns to him stark naked and rolls his eyes. He grabs his adidas trackies and pulls them on. “You’re going commando?” 

“Jesus, Harreh.” Louis moans and heads for the door. “Stop analysin’ everthin’ I do.” He heads downstairs to make some tea. He’s just filling the kettle by the sink, when a hot body presses against his back.

“You know I was thinking…” Harry starts lulling into Louis’ ear, once he had placed his chin on his shoulder.

“Tha’s always a good thing t’ do.” He shuts off the water.

Harry pinches him against the side. Louis does not make the most embarrassing squeak ever. “The Choir has this meet in a few weeks, and we are supposed to start thinking about the perfect song. So I was researching a whole lot.” 

“Mhm…” Louis hums, when he tries to move closer to the kettle. It’s a little hard with a big stickman of a person hanging off of his back.

“… and I came across all these nautical stuff.” Harry says. “You know how much I like nautical stuff.”

Louis plays with the hand on his hip, he whispers “didn’t know tha’.”

“I do.” Harry says. He stays quiet for too long.

“And wha’ love?” Louis asks, staring out into the backyard where Daisy and Phoebe are practice their latest karate moves. 

“At Nevis,” Harry’s slow voice says. “You told me that I’m you’re anchor.” The air shifts into something intimate. Harry’s breath puff against his neck, his hot hands grabbing into his skin on his hip. Dizziness spreads inside his mind. Harry’s smell invades their bubble, mingles with his own. They didn’t shower, preferring a hot tea before they started their day. Their mingled smells feels so good. “What did you mean?” 

“Don’t ye know?” Louis asks. He’s unable to put into words what he meant. Harry softly leaves a kiss on the crook of his neck.

“You said it before, in one of your songs. They were for me right?” 

“I thought it obvious they were for ye.” Louis whispers. His neck is getting hot from all the kisses Harry’ leaves there. “I… when I came to terms with how I felt about ye. Feel about ye I mean.” He nervously chuckles, “I felt like I was pushed into open water, ye know? The only thing keepin’ me grounded was you! And at the hotel, when ye let me… in, I realised ye are me strength and me safest place. Ye keep me from explodin’, from just driftin’ away from the heavy storms around us. And in turn ye make me strong too. Ye always stay true to who ye are, ye’re an anchor.” Louis holds his breath, until he feels the droplets hitting his shoulder. He wants to turn around to Harry, but he keeps him firmly there. “Please stop cryin’.” 

“Happy tears, Lou!” Harry whispers. The doorbell goes off. They don’t move.

“Don’t mind me.” Jay says, as she power-waddles to the front door. Harry chuckles against Louis skin. Outside Daisy kicks Phoebe too hard, and she falls to the ground. 

“So…” Harry says, clearing his throat. “I want to get a tattoo.” 

“Hate t’ break it t’ ye, but ye got a ton of them.” Louis says, and finally he’s permitted to turn and face Harry. He uses his thumb pats to rub away the tears. 

“I want an anchor.” Harry says. Louis smiles, it falls off when Harry says “I want to get matching tattoos.” 

Louis feels his heart hammering, trying to overcompensate for his face loosing so much colour. “I… I don’t like tattoos.” 

“We already have one matching one.” Harry says and grabs Louis’ wrists. His lips trace the quotation marks. “Not to mention the cute penguin on your glorious bum.”

“Always thinkin’ of me bum.” Louis chuckles, shaking his head. “What’s tha’ mum?” Louis asks, when she sees her placing a heavy looking square on the kitchen counter. 

“Don’t want to disturb you two.” She smiles, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Ew mum.” Jay laughs. Harry releases Louis’ body.

“I know that box. Is it from my Bakery?” Harry curiously asks.

Louis snorts, “yer bakery? Since when does it belong t’ ye?” 

“Fine, Mandeville Bakery. I work there, might as well be mine.” Harry huffs. 

“Yes. It is.” Jay says, ignoring the banter. “It’s for Louis. Sorry Harry.” 

Harry looks gleeful nonetheless, “uohhh how interesting.” Louis chuckles and walks over to the box. He lifts the lid. It’s a blue cake with green candles. Large obnoxious letters spell out ‘I’m sorry Louis! Forgive me - Z.’ Harry looks over his shoulder,“oh, that is so sweet of him.”

“No, it isn’t sweet. He wants me t’ forgive the unforgivable. Tha’ bloody bastard. I’m supposed t’ forgive him with a shitty cake? For all the hell he broke loose on a constant basis. I don’t want t’ forgive him. I almost lost ye, because of him. HIM! And now he’s spitting fire into Liam’s ear. God knows what kind of drivel.” Louis lifts the cake with one hand staring at it. “Shitty, ugly thing!” He screams and turns on his heel to throw it into the bin with his best basketball curve. The only thing he forgot though was Harry. Harry, who a minute ago had cooed at the ‘sweet’ gesture. The cake flies in a high arc, over the kitchen and into Harry’s face. He had closed his eyes just as it had made contact with him. 

Now he opens his eyes, cake falling off his eyelids, to look down at Louis, who is pressing his hand over his mouth. A giggle passes Louis’ lips, “come here you annoying prat!” Harry screams, Louis squeals and tries to run for it. Unlucky for him, Harry has very long legs. He catches him in the hallway around his middle and uses the cake still on his face to spread it all over Louis’ lips.

Louis is laughing loudly, making it easier for Harry to scoop the cake past his lips. “Sh-op…” giggling Louis tries to kick at Harry’s long legs, which force him to the ground. Harry stops once the smaller boy starts tickling him.

Harry licks his lips, “hm… yummy.” 

“Ye should wear cake more often.” Louis says. 

“Wanker.” Harry grins while his large tongue tries to get to the sticky pastry on the corner of his lips. Louis suddenly remembers the way it was deep inside his own bum last night. His cock tries to stir. He shakes himself. 

“Tea?” 

As the new week started, the footie team started to practice harder and much longer than they had since coming back from Winter holidays. Louis decided not to forgive Zayn, though he did accept his presence around his friends. He was only doing it for Harry and Liam’s pleadings. “Ready for the game?” Liam asks, when he takes a seat next to Louis at their usual table.

“I think so. Hate it when it’s still this cold and I ‘ave t’ run in short shorts.” Louis mumbles.

“I’m pretty sure your boyfriend LoVes these short shorts.” Liam grins and elbows him. “What’s got into you?” 

“Harry wants t’ get matchin’ tattoos. The idea’s a little bit scary.” Louis says, looking up to see Liam’s concern written all over his brown eyes.

“Kinda like the ultimate lifelong bond.” Liam agrees.

“Yeah exactly.” Louis says, absentmindedly rearranging the peas one by one on his plate.

“You two are becoming a proper ship now.” Liam chuckles. He’s only relieved Louis doesn’t have something too terrible on his mind.

“What?” Louis asks.

“You know like Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter: a ship. They call them Drarry. What should we call you?” Liam asks and taps his chin thoughtfully. 

“What’s up?” Zayn asks and joins them. Louis doesn’t comment, biting the inside of his cheek.

“Thinking about what Harry and Louis’ ship name would be.” Liam says casually.

“That’s easy. Larry.” Zayn says and opens his lunch box. A bunch of grapes appear.

“Ew, no.” Louis shakes his head. Harry squeezes his knee when he sits down next to him. 

“What’s ew?” Harry asks.

“Louis doesn’t like our ship name for the two of you.” Zayn grins, making Louis’ insides vomit. 

“What is it?” Niall asks, curiously watching Harry peel a banana.

“Larry.” 

“OHHH I love it!” Harry says excitedly. Louis rolls his eyes. 

“ ‘course ye do.” Louis chuckles, shaking his head. It’s a nice feeling to know everyone at the table knows about Larry. “Fine, maybe we can use it as a code word.” 

“Yes.” Harry fist-bumps Niall across the table.

“You two look like two dorks when you do that.” Jade says when her food clutters down on their table. Perrie sits down next to her, and Harry blushes from her girlfriends comment. She eyes Zayn, “I heard you got a new girlfriend Zayn.”

“Really? He told us nothing.” Niall’s head whips around to Zayn. Zayn rolls his eyes annoyed, while Liam stares down at his sandwich. 

“None of your business.” Zayn stares back at Jade. 

“Why?” Perrie asks. “Don’t you think you could have told me? Looked like right mug when Sophia couldn’t wait to spread the news.” She’s frowning, an old hard-feeling bubbling up inside her.

“It’s nothing.” Zayn says. Liam blushes. It reminds Louis of the time Louis would deny liking Harry or whenever he turned his back on him. His heart soars out to Liam. He kicks him under the table and gives him a small smile when he looks up. Liam smiles back.

“Right, because no relationship is truly important to you, is it?” Perrie asks, slapping one hand on the table. 

“My relationships with my friends is important to me. You, not so much.” Zayn retorts. 

“That’s not very nice.” Liam mumbles. Zayn gives him a look, which Liam supposedly can read. His chin meets his collarbone again.

“Ahem…” Louis clears his throat awkwardly. All eyes snap to him. Louis feels uncomfortable. 

“Hey beauties.” Calum grins when he appears above Jade and Perrie. They try to smile, which is much more a grimace than anything. “So, we got a problem.”

“Wha’ problem mate?” Louis asks, making Calum’s eyes snap over to him. 

“My mum said no to a party. We were wondering if you could hold the after-game party, since we’re going to win and all, we’re going to arrange a banger party.” Calum says, grinning from side to side. Harry reaches his fist out and knocks on the table. 

“Sorry, superstitious.” Harry says blushing. Calum only nods. 

Louis smiles fondly, before releasing he was asked a question. “Not goin’ t’ work at mine. Me mum’s large and pregnant, she can barely get down the bloody stairs.” 

“Forgot about that. Congrats mate.” Calum says.

“Cheers.” Louis smiles. Harry squeezes his knee again. Louis tries to shake him off, but Harry’s got him in a secure grip.

“Don’t look at me, my mum would hog the party and offer little sandwiches in miniature form. She’d run around scolding everyone and forcing them to pose for pictures.” Liam says. Louis can very much picture it and chuckles loudly. The others all decline as well, and Harry doesn’t even try to say anything. Louis gives him a question look, but he only shakes his shoulder-length curls. 

“Can’t we just go t’ the local?” Louis asks.

“Some of us aren’t legal, though.” Ashton says when he suddenly appears out of nowhere. 

Jade taps her finger against her chin, “have you asked Taylor? She’s got that large mansion.” 

“She says she’s not part of the team, so she doesn’t have to throw the party.”

“Wait a moment,” Louis giggles. “She’s the mascot!” Louis stands up, ignoring the surprised faces of his friends. “Ashton, let’s go.” Ashton raises his eyebrows, but follows his captain. They walk slaloms around the round tables until they come to a stop in front of Taylor and Danielle. 

“Hi Louis.” Danielle breathes across to him. Louis smiles kindly, but swiftly turns to the blonde.

“How do ye like bein’ the mascot Taylor?” Louis says. He can see Ashton take a  wide-legged stand in the corner of his eye. 

“It’s fun.” Taylor says, “but not when you keep hitting me with a football. That’s not cool.” Louis chuckles when he remembers the time when he hit her on purpose to stop the game.

“Sorry.” Louis holds up his hands. “So, we kind of need ye t’ take one for the team.” 

Taylor huffs, “you just want my house.” She rolls her eyes and it annoys Louis drastically. 

“We can just come by, and you would be none the wiser.” Ashton says next to Louis. He turns to the boy with an ‘are you for real’ face. “Don’t be such a wimp.” 

Louis turns around to her again, “Taylor, what would ye need t’ make this happen?” Taylor grins brightly like this was her plan all along. She keeps thinking. Ashton starts drumming his fingers on his forearm in annoyance. 

“Harry.” Taylor says. Louis can feel a big lump forming in his throat.

“The fag?” Ashton asks, and Louis zips around to him. Ashton quickly looks down to the ground and mumbles an apology.

“I’ll make sure he’s there.” Louis says with a hoarse voice, the ball in his throat expanding. 

“No. I want a guaranteed dance with him.” Taylor says smugly.

“Don’t push yer luck,” Louis’ voice drops as he leans forward into her face.

“No dance. No party.” Narcissistically she pushes a dozen potato chips into her mouth. Louis never had more of a desire to punch her in the face. 

“Deal.” Ashton says for him. And how can Louis say no? If this is their only way to celebrate after their win or loss at the next game… Louis turns and walks back to his table. He sees Harry brighten up when he approaches him and swallows harshly. 

He sits down back on his spot. “You look like you saw a ghost.” Liam says.

“Harry ye ‘ave t’ dance with Taylor.” Louis says to Harry.

“Oh.” Harry says. “Okay.” 

“Okay?” Louis turns to look at him. He bites down on his tongue trying to ignore the hate surfing through his veins. Liam nudges him under the table to remind him that Jade, Perrie and Calum are still at their table. “Great. Good. Party is at Taylor’s.” Louis fakes a smile when he faces the table. This time he brushes Harry’s grip off of his knee when he tries to touch him again. 

💚🍑💙

Liam groans when he falls to the ground next to Louis, who is nursing on his water bottle. “Bloody hate suicides man, makes me feel like a jelly shot.” 

Louis snorts, “great analogy mate.” Liam smiles at him and stares into his lap. “So…” Louis looks around them and stares at the other players who are still finishing their suicide runs. “…about Zayn. What… ah shit I’m terrible at this.” Liam chuckles lightly at that. “Did he talk about you at lunch?” 

“Last weekend,” Liam says, so softly Louis barely hears him. “You and Harry were gone and Z stayed at my house. He didn’t want to go home, because his father tries to monitor him too much.” Louis hums in recognition. “We… he wanted to … fuck me. I was like okay why not? Right? Haven’t tried that before, so I agreed.”

“He didn’t force ye?” Louis asks, aghast. 

“No! No, none of that.” Liam shakes his head, but he’s still not facing Louis. He prays Liam gets faster in talking, because Ashton is done and walks over to the water fountain staring at the two suspiciously. “We were preparing… you know?” Liam looks up in hopes he doesn’t have to look up at him. 

“I get it.” Louis chuckles, “he wanted to finger ye.” Liam blushes violently, but nods. 

“So he got close to my…” Liam stays red in the face. “God, my fucking asshole.” Louis laughs at his friends demise. “It felt so weird.” 

“Weird?” Louis asks, remembering the feeling himself. The way it sparked anticipation, how he begged Harry to just go ahead with it already. He doesn’t remember feeling weird, just hot and bothered.

“Yes, Louis. It felt weird and wrong. I let him continue, but then he tried to…” Liam makes a jamming motion with his finger. 

“Jam his finger up yer bum.” Louis says. Liam stares at him, _whoops too crass again._ “Sorry. Penetrate yer lovely bum with one of his digits.” 

“I didn’t like it. I told him to stop.” Liam says. “He’s been awkward ever since.” 

“Awkward?” Louis asks, he needs to make sure he understands what happened.

Liam nods, staring at his hands again. “He’s different around me, weirdly annoyed. Anything I say makes him scoff or roll his eyes. He still comes over and gives me a blowie or a hand job, but he’s too quiet.” 

“I’m sorry. I don’t knaw wha’ t’ say.” Louis says, he leans over and starts rubbing his back. “Maybe ye should tell him t’ take it up the ass if he really wants to ‘ave sex.” Liam laughs at that and Louis feels like he accomplished something. 

“Why you two look like two dead birds?” Niall asks and opens a small pack of chips. 

“Dead birds?” Louis asks.

Meanwhile, Liam says “why are you even here? You’re knee’s still out right?” 

“Like to show my support. Plus, I like watching you torture yourself through some suicides. ” Niall grins and pops a chip into his mouth. “You really okay with Harry dancing with Taylor?” 

“No.” Louis says honestly. “But it’s just one dance, after tha’ Harry is all mine.” 

“Sure.” Niall says around a mouthful of chips. “As long as you can tare him away from Taylor for long enough.” Louis throws his bottle after him and ends up tackling the Irish. 

Still plagued by his knee injury, Niall is forced to sit this game out. He’s standing in his jersey next to Harry, who is wearing a shirt which has five large letters on them L-A-R-R-Y. Louis scoffs when he sees him excitedly jump up and down next to Louis’ father, Mark. “I want a clean game.” The referee says to Louis and the team captain of the Delph Harpies. The guy is a redhead with a powerful grip.

_This is it,_ Louis reminds himself. If they don’t win this, they will be out of the tournament for good. It’s a tough play. Delph is already through to the quarter-finals, while the crusaders were on their last leg. Delph, however, wasn’t going down without a fight. They were determined to keep up their wining streak. Both teams score in the first half, but there is no clear winner when they go into the second. Louis can feel the sweat dripping down his back and pooling at the edge of his spine. Ashton tackles number 3 from the other team, who falls to the ground and theatrically holds onto his ankle. “Feel me sweat drippin’ into me asshole,” Louis complains to Dougie, who laughs. 

The other team take their penalty shot. Liam tries to defend as best as he can, even throws his body in front of it. But they are powerless to stop the ball from hammering into the net. “Bloody hell.” Louis moans ruffling his hair. He looks up at the stand and sees Phoebe sitting on Harry’s shoulder. She’s screaming, “Go Louis… go go go Louis!” Daisy is doing much the same on their father’s shoulders. The stands are taking up the chant to scream, “go crusaders.” Louis takes in the energy and adrenaline that is giving him and turns over to his team. 

He claps into his freezing hands and calls the boys to him. “Alright lads, we got … wha’? Like fifteen minutes left. Let’s get our shit together, alright?” The boys hum. The referee blows her whistle, pointing to the middle. This is no time to make a huddle, she motions. Louis doesn’t care. “Let’s start passing. Ashton is never open, because tha’ dick number 3 keeps blockin’ him. So we’re goin’ t’ move up the defenders.”

“Are you mad?” Dougie asks. 

“No. We got nothin’ t’ lose no more.” Louis says. “Dan and Liam ye’re stayin’ on the line. The other two, move up as soon as we ‘ave the ball. We’re goin’ t’ force the ball on t’ their side of the pitch.”The referee blows the whistle, unwilling to wait for the crusaders to get into position. Louis’ team disperses quickly. After the initial shock, their goalkeeper defends an attack from the Harpies successfully. He throws the ball to Liam, who passes it up to the left defender standing in midfield. They stick to their counterattack. The Harpies remain in a squandering circle around the halfway line. They make it into the penalty box of the Harpies. Louis receives the ball.

Louis rambles against the defender, who sways forward dangerously. Louis realises this predicament and pushes the ball backwards with his heel. He surprises himself in giving up a goal willingly. The ball spins backwards right in front of Liam, who kicks it in a nice tug into the net. The crowd roars. Louis jumps up and down into Liam’s arm, “my first goal…” Liam stares at the goal unbelieving and Louis gives him an obnoxious kiss to the cheek. 2-2. 

“Alright boys, ten minutes. Ten minutes, let’s make this count.” Louis screams once he snatched the ball and placed it back on the kick-off point. He’s trying to force the other team to stop dragging their feet. He fumes when the referee takes her time blowing the whistle, and he just knows it’s because he delayed her earlier.

The other team kicks off and the Crusaders push into their spaces. With all their might they try to pry away the ball from the small passes they make between each other. Louis is about to tackle someone out of spite when Dougie steps into a pass and takes the ball in front of his own feet. They all run forward toward the goal. Louis can feel his heart thumping, his adrenaline shooting through his veins. _We can still make it_. Louis tries to worm himself towards the goal, pushing the defenders backwards in hopes they won’t be in off side. 

He’s not quite sure what happens at the goal line. There’s a defender trying to slide-tackle, there’s a goalie on his hands and knees trying to grab at the ball and there is three of his teammates trying to score a goal. Somehow, the ball rolls into the goal. Louis turns around and sees Calum and Ashton standing with him near the goal. Louis throws himself into their arms. “We’re going to the championships!” Ashton screams and hoists Louis into the air. Louis squeals, but lets Ashton manhandle him. 

Niall is hobbling towards him on is crutches. Harry is following him with wildly flying curls. Ashton drops Louis back down once Niall has reached them, and he hugs the blonde. “Good game.” A harpy says. Louis turns around and shakes the redheads hand. 

“I suppose we’ll see ye at the final?” 

“Lot of confidence in such a small body.” The harpy says, and Louis really wants to kick him now. He plasters on a smile and nods. _Just ye wait and see_.

“Alright, settle down!” Louis calls from where he is standing on the table. “The ball,” he holds up the footie ball from today’s game. Everyone of the team signed it in advance, “goes t’ the best player of the game.” Loud cheers erupt through Taylor’s mansion. “Who is….” he grins when his crowd tries to guess “… LIAM!!!!!” Liam looks baffled when he stares up at Louis. Zayn shoves him and Liam walks over to Louis who places the ball in his hand. Liam grins proudly.

“SPEECH!” The crowd sores. Louis laughs, he feels like they already won the damn championship, which is ridiculous because they simply got a spot in the quarter-finals. 

Liam awkwardly climbs on to the table next to him, “I want to thank…” Liam thinks hard, “God.” Everyone cheers, “and like my coach. And my mom for making me who I am.” An amused chuckle runs through the crowd. 

“What about us, aye?” Louis asks and slings an arm around Liam’s shoulder. He can see him think. 

Liam shrugs, “yeah suppose so.” His teammates laugh and raise their glasses. Liam and Louis take the shots offered to them and jump down from the table. The music starts blaring again, and the table gets moved around to create a bar. Louis casually, as best as he can muster, walks over to the archway which leads to the living room where the dancing already started. 

“Hi.” Louis says and tries to push their glasses together. Harry wasn’t expecting that and the alcohol swoops over his hand. 

“Oops.” Harry says. Louis ignores the tiredness in his bones and reaches out to pat Harry’s hand with his muscle shirt. He also sees how Harry licks his lips. Louis is wearing his blue washed-out jeans with a black muscle shirt which is too big for him, thereby exposing his sides all the way down to his hips. “I’m sorry you didn’t score today.” 

Louis just shrugs, “as long as someone else did. Besides, maybe, it was me who scored the last goal, no one knows.” He shakes his head in faux irritation. Harry giggles. Louis leans forward to rub his thumb over Harry’s love handles. Harry bites his lips while he’s watching the smaller boy. 

Harry tries to clear his throat, and croaks out “still did good.” 

“Cheers, babe.” Louis smiles. He starts pouring down his cup in one go. His mouth is unusually dry. The liquid almost hurts when he slithers down. 

“I’m READY!” Taylor screams into Louis’ ear. Louis rolls his eyes annoyed. Harry is watching him with hesitation. “You coming or what?” 

“Yeah, yeah, of course. Promise is a promise.” Harry says and reaches his ringed up finger out to her. Taylor’s hand fits perfectly into Harry’s larger ones. She jogs to the dance floor, where she quickly rounds Harry into an embrace, and they start to sway together. Louis watches Harry take her hands off his shoulder and starts motioning their joined hands back and forth. Their hips starting moving together as well. Louis smiles seeing Harry try and be seductive, while his hips stay stubbornly non-rotatable. 

“You hate her yet?” Zayn asks. He leans against the archway just like Harry did moments ago.

“Yes.” Louis says and lets the envy take a hold of him. “I might launch at her and pry her ugly eyes out.” 

Zayn snorts next to him, “very vivid.” 

“Fock off.” Louis says. “What do ye knaw about it?” Louis watches Zayn’s eyes drift to Liam. Liam is talking to Jade and Dougie, who is also in his choir group. “Tell me, truthfully, wha’ do ye feel for him.” Zayn’s head snaps to him watching Louis with dark eyes. “He told me he was uncomfortable when ye tried t’ ‘ave sex with him and been a bastard t’ him ever since.” 

“I stopped didn’t I?” Zayn says automatically. Though there is a storm in those irises telling Louis how mad he is Liam told someone about them.

“Tha’s not really the point.” Louis says. Zayn stiffens up. 

“What happens between me and Liam, happens between him and I. Get it?” Zayn asks. He fishes out his phone and starts typing away. 

Louis rolls his eyes, “except his friends won’t watch ye treat him like shit.” 

“I’m not, Louis.” Zayn says. “I’ve never treated anyone as good as I have treated him.” Louis stares at Zayn, but doesn’t say what he was thinking. He treated Perrie like a lunatic, so any improvement from that is an improvement. Doesn’t change the fact he’s still treating Liam badly. “Poor Harry.” Zayn says and points at the dance floor. Louis looks up to see Taylor grind against Harry’s groin. Harry has his fingers around her hips, trying to push her pelvis away from his own. Louis chuckles when he sees Harry’s frantic expression and how he hobbles backwards.

At the same time his anger flares up, how dear that fake-blonde attack his boyfriend. _She’s not worthy t’ feel his gorgeous cock against her bum_! Louis steps forward, but Zayn’s arm slings around his middle stopping him. Louis can feel his breath fan over his shoulder. His gut flutters. Only a moron thinks Zayn isn’t at least attractive. Louis remembers his lips on his own. “Let me go.” He says. 

“You really want to out yourself over something this stupid?” Zayn breathes into his ear. “You need to relax, follow me.” Louis’ anger flares again, but he knows Zayn is right. He can’t run in between the two and act like a raging alpha. Reluctantly he follows Zayn outside. Louis can feel Liam’s eyes on him. 

Taylor’s backyard has a swimming pool with some lounging chairs. The nights are getting slightly warmer since it’s the end of March, but Louis still shivers in his muscle shirt. Zayn plops down on the chair and starts rolling a blunt. “Seriously?” Zayn raises his head to watch him with a raised eyebrow. “Ye really didn’t learn anythin’ at tha’ rehab!” 

“You have no idea what you are talking about.” Zayn says. He gives Louis the blunt and a lighter. 

Louis lights the blunt beneath his shirt. He lets the smoke speed its way into the sky. “I knaw ye had a problem. I was there. In Ibiza.”

Zayn laughs non-humorously, “my parents send me to rehab to clear my head. All I learned there was how I could please my parents again, mate. I sorted a lot of shit out like communication. I went through heavy detox, because I pushed so much shit into me. I know why I did it, and how to stop myself from doing it again. This,” he takes the blunt away from Louis and wiggles it in the air, “isn’t the problem.” With closed eyes Zayn takes a long drag.

“I didn’t knaw.” Louis says, trying to sort away everything Zayn had just told him.

“How could you? You never came to visit.” Zayn says. Louis’ eyes drift upward, he watches his former best friend stare back at him with an accusatory look.

Louis ignores the flutter of guilt in his stomach and concentrates on his hate, “sometimes I feel like ye don’t even remember what happened in Ibiza. I thought apologising is a part of your treatment.” 

“Are you fucking with me? How many times have I begged for your forgiveness in the past months!?” Zayn’s voice rumbles from the distress.

“I knaw wha’ ye are doin’, Zayn!” Louis stands up and hisses down at him, “I knaw ye’re usin’ Liam to get back in with us. I knaw it, because I knaw ye wouldn’t be able to be with us in any way. Ye like tha’ he’s infatuated with ye. Ye exploit the way he wants t’ experiment. Tha’s why ye’re treatin’ him like shit after he refused t’ get fucked by ye. Because he’s slippin’ away and with him, so are we!” Louis abruptly turns and walks back inside. He rubs his arms in hopes they get warmer. Louis quickly finds Harry and Liam talking to Taylor and Perrie. Armed with a beer, Louis steps into the circle. Taylor is talking about her pet tortoise. 

“A tortoise? Do you feed it um… string beans? Cause I used know a tortoise once, and he liked to eat string beans…” Harry says, his fingers pointing out how big the beans were. 

Louis chuckles, “is this a joke… or?” 

“No… I mean… it was my neighbours…it wasn’t like… a friend…” Harry says confused. The green of his eyes dart to Louis, who is grinning at him. He’s never sure when Harry is joking, because they are just that bad. The best give away is mostly when Harry tries to hide his laughter with a suppressed smile or giggle. Harry rolls his eyes. _Okay, he’s really not joking_. 

“Apologies, please continue.” Louis grins and drinks from his beer bottle. It thrills him how Harry’s eyes immediately pop down to where his lips surround the mouth of the bottle. Louis winks at him.

“I don’t know what he feeds her, it’s my brothers pet not mine.” Taylor says, a little irritated. _Good, piss off_. Louis thinks and continues to ignore her.

“I only have Loki, my dog.” Liam says and rubs his arm where his tattoo is visible. 

“Oh Lima Bean!” Louis coos obnoxiously. Liam looks at him giving him weird looks.

“What about you Tommo, any pets?” Perrie inquires. 

Louis nods focusing on Perrie, “yeah, we used t’ ‘ave a dog named Ted. We made him a Facebook and everything. But mum doesn’t want any more pets, says house is full enough.” 

“Suppose that’s true.” Harry mumbles. Louis tries to kick at him but fails.

“Are you growing out a beard, Louis?” Taylor asks him, her head is cocked while she stares at Louis’ lips. 

“Not really, just happened I suppose. Forgot to shave.” Louis says and traces the light stubble on his top lip. “Why does it look bad?” 

“No, just different.” Taylor says shrugging. 

“If you need help I’m sure you can step by Perrie’s place.” Liam says. “You still work at your mum’s hairdresser right?” 

“No.” Perrie pouts.

“What? Why? What happened?” Harry asks, concern drips in his deep voice. 

“I got 20 quid a week for cleaning hair off the floor. I just found out my mum gave the shopkeeper the 20 quid to give to me.” She keeps pouting, and Louis has to laugh.

“Ye got t’ be jokin’?”

“Nah, she thought it was great I wanted to work to get some extra quid. But offensive if you ask me!” Perrie says. 

“I think it’s nice of her.” Harry says. 

Louis chuckles, “ ‘course ye do.” Harry gives him a glare. “Come on, I got t’ show ye somethin’.” Louis says and grabs a hold on Harry’s wrist dragging him away. 

“Where are you going Harry?” Taylor calls after him. Louis just pulls harder, dragging Harry a long way through some curved corridor. 

“Where are we going?” Harry asks, his Chelsea boots slipping on the marble floor. 

“Did ye knaw she was this rich?” Louis asks over his shoulder.

“Yes.” Harry says. Louis can feel himself grow stiff in his pants, thinking about all the rooms they could hide in together. He crowds Harry against the wall. He attacks his lips without warning. On pure instinct Harry kisses him back. Louis’ hands roam over the taller boy, pushing his nails into his pudgy hips. Harry tries to grab his face, the splint pokes into Louis’ cheek. 

They separate, and Louis takes Harry’s finger from his face, prepping it with light kisses. “Does it hurt?”

“No.” Harry says. “Just two more weeks and it’s off.” Louis hums when he takes the finger (plus splint) in between his lips. Harry moans loudly. “Shhh… got t’ stay quiet baby.” Louis says.

“Sorry. I don’t know why that turns me on.” Harry says, cheeks flushing. Louis grins sucking on the splint and reaches out to take a hold of Harry’s bulge. He can feel Harry going more rigid the more he sucks on his finger. Harry pants softly. 

“Want me t’ suck this?” Louis asks and gives a hard squeeze to his growing erection. 

Harry surpasses a groan, “I… I don’t…” He frantically looks down the corridor. 

Louis lets Harry’s finger drop. “Okay.” He shrugs nonchalance and takes Harry’s hand to go back to the party. 

“Wait. Now I’m all horned up.” Harry whines. 

Louis grins at him, “yer choice big boy.” He chuckles more when he sees Harry stare down at Louis’ lips. “Be good.” They walk back to the party where Louis grabs a new beer. For the life of him, he can’t remember where he left his last one. Harry presses his erection into his bum. 

“Please help me.” 

“Maybe later.” Louis says, grinning over his shoulder. 

“Take it somewhere else.” Niall warns them as he reached them on his crutches.

“I’m not nearly drunk enough t’ leave yet.” Louis argues. Harry detaches from him, and Louis immediately misses his warmth. 

“Heard you had a brawl with Zayn.” Niall says. 

“Don’t over-exaggerate, we had a discussion.” 

“Louis, you said you’d be nice to him.” Harry says accusatively.

“I was.” Louis lies. “We talked about his recovery.” 

“Hence the brawl.” Niall chuckles. 

‘Don’t say hence.” Louis says, he wiggles his eyebrows “can ye dance on them crutches?” 

“Sure can.” Niall grins, “just a little dangerous for everyone around us.” 

“Perfect.” Louis grins and they hobble to the living room. Niall basically just wiggles his bum from side to side and head bangs along to the music. Louis enjoys this kind of dancing, the no-fucks given attitude. So he sways his hips, reaches his hands above his head and starts bobbing to the music. Adrenaline shoots through him one more time, allowing him to override the exhaustion from his body. At some point he sees Harry dancing with Perrie, and Ashton dancing next to himself. He closes his eyes and thinks about the way how Harry’s body would feel against himself. 

The music changes to something too slow to dance with friends and Louis opens his eyes again. Across the room he sees Harry in an embrace with Perrie, much like he did with Taylor. Annoyance bubbles up in him. The house is already quieter than before, a lot of people already went home. Ashton is still head banging (even to the slow pace) with Niall. Louis stares at his phone, which he squeezes out of his skin tight pants. 0320. “Oi.” Both Niall and Ashton look up. “I’m headin’ home. See ye on Monday.” Niall nods. 

“Don’t get lost.” Ashton laughs. Louis types Harry’s number into his phone and calls him, trying to gain his attention. But Harry doesn’t feel the vibration against his leg, just laughs along with whatever one of his friends just whispered into his ear. Louis scoffs. With a determined face he stalks over to Harry. 

“Want t’ go home?” 

Harry looks around where the girls are staring at him. “Ehm…”

Louis rolls his eyes at Harry’s indecisiveness. An hour ago he couldn’t wait to head home. “I’m leavin’. See ya.” He waves at the girls and turns around walking outside. A warm hand wraps around his bicep.

“Wait.” Harry places his coat around Louis shoulders. Louis can feel heat shoot into his cheeks. “Why do you never wear a coat, when you are always cold.”

Shrugging Louis says, “‘cause ye are always here t’ lend me one.” Harry shakes his head, but a soft smile is on his lips. “It’s gettin’ warmer anyway.”Once they turn around a corner, Harry’s warm hand takes a hold of Louis’ cold one. They walk in silence to Louis’ house, where they climb their way into Louis’ room. 

They make quick work of their clothes and find their way into Louis’ bed. His bedsheet wraps around them tightly, when Louis straddles Harry to rub their cocks against each other. “Such a good top.” Harry keeps whispering into his ear, while his hand tightly holds on to Louis’ bum. Louis has a good hold with both hands on Harry’s neck. He uses it as leverage to continuously rub himself up and down on Harry’s body. Louis’ biceps strain under the action. His entire body is ready to collapse. Harry is nibbling on his ear. 

“Kiss me.” Louis begs, and Harry shifts to stare into Louis’ eyes, their tongues meet before their lips. Softly they rub against each other. He moans when he comes all over Harry’s stomach. He follows him after a few painful minutes. Like always when Harry comes, the boy gets tired and yawns into his hand. Louis leans over him, Harry grunts, to get to the tissues he has on his bedside table. He sits up to clean Harry’s abs. 

“Such a hot bean.” Harry mumbles, while his hand rubs over his thighs. 

“Wha’ is it with ye and beans tonight?” Louis chuckles, and throws the tissues back on the table next to his bed. Harry smiles up at him until Louis gives him a goodnight kiss, and leans his head down on top of Harry’s heart. His legs still straddle him. Louis listens to Harry’s heart thumping slowly in against his ear, while he falls asleep.

💚🍑💙

The door jams open early in the morning. Groggily Louis lifts his hot cheek from Harry’s chest. The taller boy’s hands immediately circle his waist to keep him close to himself. “Oh, sorry.” Mark says when he sees the two barely covered by the dark sheets. Louis blinks his eyes when the light catches in his eyes. “Yer mother wants me to wake ye. She needs help setting up the party.” Mark says, awkwardly he rubs his neck. 

“I’ll be up in a sec.” Louis yawns, and rubs his nose against Harry’s chest again.

“Good. Good.” Mark stutters. 

“Party?” Harry mumbles into the caramel coloured hair draped over his mouth. 

Louis places his chin on Harry’s sternum to look up at him, “the twins are ‘avin’ a karate party for their birthday.” 

“Karate?” Harry asks. His lips look particularly inviting, pink like spun sugar. Crawling upwards Louis places a soft peck to the sugary pink. 

“They found a new hobby. Sadly for me it’s not footie.” Louis mumbles. 

“I got them a jewellery set.” Harry says. 

“Wha’?” Louis chuckles. 

“It’s a make it yourself jewellery set with pearls and letters and stuff.” Harry says, while Louis slips off of his thighs to lean on his side. He chuckles lightly against Harry’s armpit. He can’t explain why he likes that spot so much. Maybe because there lingers his most potent smell. He breathes in the sulky air.Harry giggles, because Louis’ breath tickles his side, “you’re weird.” 

“Cheers,” Louis says. “I’m so bloody tired.” He moans. 

Harry runs his hand through Louis’ hair, “the game was too exhausting?” 

“Yeah, the game. The party. Babe, we were so close to losing.” Louis says. There’s another knock at the door. 

“Boo bear,” Fizzy teases on the other side of the door, obviously unwilling to take a peak into his room. “Mum’s waiting for ye.” 

“Do we have time for a quickie?” Harry asks innocently as they hear Fizzy’s footsteps retreating. 

“No.” Louis says and moans when he sits up exhausted. He stretches his back like a cat and puts his aching feet down on the floor, over his shoulder he says “but we both need a shower.” Harry is up in record time. 

The birthday is a complete success. The twins took their time carefully unpacking their presents. Harry’s gift being one of the major squeal moments. At one o’clock their friends pile into the house. Jay and Mark had created a few small stations everyone could pass through, all surrounding karate. Harry and Louis were manning the small station where the kids could split wood with their little hands or feet. “Just imagine it’s the bad witch!!!” Daisy kept squealing. Harry was giving Louis weird looks, but he wasn’t sure how he was going to explain that to his boyfriend. 

Michael Clifford comes around unexpectedly, because he gained a job at Harry’s bakery as a currier. He gives Louis’ the cake with a shy smile. Louis chuckles when he sees the toping is decorated with a ton of unicorns. It reads, ‘Happy Birthday Daisy & Phoebe 10!’.

Their friends leave around six. The family falls on the sofas, taking a moment just to relax. Mark puts the X-Factor on. Louis has no more energy, just lays against Harry’s strong chest and almost purrs when Harry strokes his hair. He hums when Harry feeds him another pizza slice. “That’s disgusting.” Lottie says, while she paints Phoebe’s toe nails. 

Louis doesn’t want to talk, so he just lifts his middle finger. “Louis restrain yourself,” Mark says.

The boy just shrugs. Mark tickles his feet in return. Louis kicks at his father at the other end of the sofas.

Daisy stuffs a full slice into her tiny mouth, “shush a good birshday!” Pepperoni scraps fly over the sofa. 

“Daisy!” Jay shakes her head. Much like Louis she is leaning into her partner. “Karate was a great idea.” She says thoughtfully. 

“Not t’ brag,” Louis says. “But I came up with tha’.” 

“Ye so didn’t.” Phoebe giggles. She wiggles her other foot into Lottie face who pulls a face before she gently takes it into her hand to paint those nails too. “Daisy wanted t’ learn karate, nothing to do with ye.” 

“Only came up with tha’ awesome story.” Louis says and strokes Harry’s arm. 

“Came up with it? It’s a true story, isn’t it?” Daisy squeals. Her eyes are widened in shock and Phoebe too sat up so abruptly that her little to scratched Lottie’s chin. Nail polish is already drying across Lottie’s scorned face. 

“Yes! Yes it’s true. Look at Harry, he’s the prince right.” Louis says fast and panicky. He sits up to pull at Harry’s curls. They bounce when he lets them go. Louis fears Harry’s state of confusion will never leave him again. 

“Ye better not lie, or I’ll kick your balls instead of the witches.” Daisy says, and slums back into her seat, pulling her knitted mermaid tail up her body. Louis shivers lightly from her tone. He’s hoping by the time she finds out the truth behind the story she’ll be old enough not to be mad about it. 

Louis lies back down on Harry’s chest and closes his eyes. Exhaustion takes him over again. The moment he realises he shamelessly fell asleep was when his body hoisted itself into two strong arms. His feet bobbed in the air where they stretched over Harry’s arm. He could easily tell Harry he’s awake, but he really likes this. A feeling of being carried off into the sunset settles over him, and he keeps his eyes closed to let Harry carry him to bed. 

Harry drops him on the bed. “I know you're faking.” Harry whispers, placing a kiss to his forehead. 

Louis leans forward, grabbing Harry’s wrist, “stay.” Harry looks torn. “Baby please. I miss ye too much when yer gone.” 

“I should go home. I’ve been here all day.” Harry mumbles shyly, ducking his head.

“I don’t care.” Louis pulls hard, and Harry, giggling, falls on top of his bed. “Come here.” Louis mumbles and grabs Harry around the middle pushing him into his arms. Harry grabs his phone out of his back pocket and starts typing away. Louis lazily starts detangling Harry’s curls. “Harry about tha’ tattoo…?” 

“You don’t have to.” Harry says, throwing the phone to the end of the bed. 

“Well, I was thinkin’ it’ll be a couples tattoo right? So when ye get the anchor wha’ do I get?” Louis asks. He’s incredibly nervous for no good reason. 

“Ehm…” Harry thinks out loud, “I mean it should fit to the nautical stuff.” 

“I think ye already ‘ave the answer. Ye’re just scared I’ll not approve, which is shit. Because I love everythin’ runnin’ around in yer head.”

Harry starts drawing patterns on Louis’ wrist, “I thought a rope.” 

“A rope?” Louis asks sceptically.

Harry turns around, so his stomach lies flat against Louis’. “Yes. Because you are strong and steady as a rope. You know? You keep everything together. The rope attaches us together. Plus you are like the captain of our ship who handles me. Your anchor.” Harry says eyes big and round like Bambi, “Plus it will look cool.” Louis really doesn’t mean to, but he snorts through his nose. “You don’t believe me.” Harry pouts. He gets up and rummages through Louis’ drawers. 

“Wha’ are ye doin’ exactly?” Louis questions. Harry pulls a pen out and returns to his position on top of Louis. He takes his arm and starts drawing, his tongue stuck between his thick lips. Louis keeps watching Harry’s beautiful face, not realising what Harry is doing until he lets out a ‘tada’. On his wrist he sees a few lines which is supposedly the rope. “Ye’re shit at drawin’ ye knaw.” Louis tells him. 

“You’re missing the point,” Harry says, he rolls his eyes.

“I’m just makin’ an observation, honey bun.” Louis chuckles. Harry pouts, but grabs his arm to add some other ‘tattoos’. “Stickman really Harold?” 

“I can’t draw anything else.” Harry says, while he adds a skateboard. “So do you like the rope or not?” 

“I do.” Louis says. “Not too boasty, besides at least this way ye’ll never forget me.” Harry draws a harsh line under the skateboard.

The green eyes stare up at him, “I could never forget you, Lou.” Harry places a kiss on his lips, “really. My boo bear.” 

“Argh.” Louis pushes his hand against Harry’s chest to get away from him. “It’s bad enough tha’ me mum calls me tha’, do ye ‘ave t’ do tha’ too?” Harry pushes back and sucks down on Louis’ sharp collarbone. Louis wiggles under him burying a groan. 

The curly head raises back up to stare down at his masterpiece with slimy pink lips. _Wha’ a turn-on_. “I think it fits you, boo-“ He doesn’t get to finish his sentence, because Louis forcefully turns him onto his back, attacking his neck with kitten-like bites.

“Your parents are still awake, all three of them.” Harry moans, his legs are already falling open for Louis to fit between. 

“Don’t care.” Louis quickly makes his way between his legs and spreads them, so he can kiss down all along Harry’s long torso. 

“Thought you’re tired.” Harry chuckles, while he circles a tight grip around Louis waist with his strong thighs. 

“Never too tired for this.” Louis says and attacks Harry’s neck. The other boy moans loudly. “Ye’re a bloody drug to me. Ye’re skin is like heroin, sweetness. One taste and I’m hooked.” 

“I’ll remind you of that when we’re old and have no time to spare.” Harry whispers. Louis sits up and stares down at him. “Did I say too much?” 

“No. It’s just…. well” Louis scratches the back of his head, “we never talked about wha’ happens when I graduate.” Louis swallows awkwardly.

Harry trails his hand down Louis shirt, to crumble up his t-shirt of his tummy. Pulling hard, Louis lies down over Harry’s body again. He blushes when he says, “I thought this is forever. At New Year’s Eve, you gave me a lifetime promise remember?” 

“Yeah,” Louis says dreamy-eyed. “There’ll never be a day where ye aren’t happy.” 

“Exactly. So I’ll join you when I can. In London or wherever you go after college” 

Rolling his hips forward against Harry’s Louis moans out “forever then.” Harry grips into his arms. He bites his lips hard to suppress his whines. Louis guides Harry’s long arms over his head to gain some control. 

“Are you topping me again?” Harry asks, his erection pressing against Louis’ stomach.

  
“I’m sorry I couldn’t hear ye from the feathers, pillow queen.” Louis jokes and lifts Harry’s legs higher to rub his pelvis against Harry’s ass. 

Harry grabs Louis t-shirt pushing him against himself. Louis just stares at the green. “You know what I want you to do?” Louis shrugs, but lets himself be pulled on top of Harry’s torso. The deep delicate voice tickles his ears “I want you to fuck me really hard while I’m handcuffed.”

“I don’t knaw if I can do tha’.” Louis says, he doesn’t even have handcuffs. His stomach knots up, yes he has fantasised about this many times. He stroked himself to an orgasm quite a few times to the image of Harry being at his mercy. But what if he does something wrong? What if he misinterprets something Harry says or does.

“You’re doing it right now.” Harry says. Louis rolls his eyes. 

“Harry, I don’t want t’ hurt ye.” Louis says. 

“Please,” Harry says and rubs himself upward to brush their groins together hard. Louis moans through his nose. “Louis, I’ve been dreaming about this.” 

“I… don’t ‘ave handcuffs.” Louis stutters, while Harry keeps humping up and against Louis.

“Don’t you have a t-shirt or a scarf?” Harry asks eagerly. 

“Yes, yes, of course.” Louis quickly says. He can feel himself getting giddy and excited for all of this. His cock throbs behind his sipper. He rushes to the closet and searches for the black scarf he has somewhere. Instead, he finds his tie. “Will this work?” Harry’s eyes dilate and nods. While Louis rushes back to him, Harry strips out of his socks and shirt. Louis bee-lines to the door to lock it before he jumps back on the bed. Something purple is peaking out of his boyfriend’s pants, but Louis is busy tying Harry’s wrists to the headboard. “Don’t rip to hard on it okay? The headboard is just jammed between the mattress and the wall. It’s not actually attached.” 

“Mhm.” Harry says, but he’s already stretching his neck out for Louis. He has such a beautiful long neck, so much room to prep with kisses and mark up like he should be. It’s such a testament to Harry’s trust in Louis. He’s showing off his most vulnerable place on his body. 

“Kiss me, Curly.” Louis says and watches Harry strain against the restraints to lean upwards and give Louis a kiss. His hands keep pushing down and his shoulder’s strain, which makes Harry hiss in pain against Louis lips. “Shh…” Louis coos, “I knaw ye love the pain.” Harry only moans into Louis’ mouth. Louis runs his hands down his chest, rubs his nipples and grips into his thighs. 

Louis detaches his lips to rip Harry’s pants from his body. Harry’s long cock is straining against the flimsy material of a lavender coloured knickers. He runs his hand over his length, “they look fantastic, Curly.” Louis says. Harry smiles at him, tongue between his teeth.“I think they look so good….” Louis starts taunting him and rubs him through his knickers. “Ye’ll keep them on.”

“Oh-kay.” Harry moans. Louis slips the knickers pressed into his crack to the right and inserts his lubed-up index finger into Harry’s bum.

“Shhh, let’s try to remain quiet alright Harold?” Louis asks. Harry nods. Beads of sweat form on his forehead when Louis adds a second finger. “My parents are awake after all.” Louis wasn’t quite sure if this was a good way to go, but judging from the pre-come bubbling out of Harry’s foreskin Harry seems to have a slight exhibitions kink. He blames the closeting for this, Harry just loves sharing his sexuality with the world.

The bed creeks when Harry’s hips smack into the air when Louis’ finds his spot. “Fuck,” Harry moans. Louis chuckles and watches Harry’s hips fuck into the air whenever Louis rubs over his prostate. “Lou…I… need you… in… ah… me.” Harry moans. 

“Shhh.” Louis taunts the younger boy, “do ye want me t’ shut ye up like at the college retreat?” Harry blushes from the memory of having Louis’ underwear in his mouth. “Good.” Louis says cheerfully. He grabs the condom, but Harry whines loudly making Louis look up in confusion. 

“I want you bare.” Harry whispers. His face is burning from embarrassment, probably never having asked this someone before. Harry’s biceps bunch and relax a couple of times.

Louis unwraps the condom, “Harry I never did a test. I got no idea if I’m clean.” 

“You don’t know if you’re clean?” Harry asks. Louis rolls the condom over his cock and rubs his hands over Harry’s thigh to lose the extra lube from the condom. 

“Never felt like it was important until now.” Louis shrugs. “And no one ever asked me to go bareback.” 

“Then that should be on your-“ Harry lets out a long groan through his nose while Louis slowly pushes into him, “ahhh list.” Louis groans when he bottoms out. “Shit, you’re so thick.”

“Thanks Curly.” Louis smiles down and gives Harry a bit of time to get used to the stretch. “Feel good?” Louis asks suddenly feeling self-conscious. 

“Better if you’d start moving.” Harry mumble. Louis chuckles watching Harry try and move his hips to encourage Louis to move. A few shallow humps later Louis finds Harry’s prostate and starts fucking into the spot with strong thrusts. “So goo-ood!” Harry whines. 

“Harry, noise level.” Louis chuckles into his collarbone. Crying out Harry pushes Louis deeper into himself with his feet on Louis’ bum. Louis feels the wet puddle on his stomach. He tries to pull out, but Harry whines. “Aren’t ye too sensitive?” Louis asks, remembering how much Eleanor hated how he continued fucking her when she orgasmed first. 

“Sort of, but…” Harry shrugs, “I like the pain.” Louis grins and continues fucking Harry. With awe Louis watches Harry’s cock slowly fill up again. 

“Again?” Louis asks, wondering how far Harry’s pain kink really went.

“Can’t help myself.” Harry whines too loudly, but Louis is too busy to correct him again. “You look so hot…hm… when you fuck me.” The headboard rattles when Harry tries to pull his hands away. Louis chuckles and bends down to suck his nipples into his mouth. The younger boys hips roll up and forward. 

“Tha’ felt good.” Louis mumbles against one nipple. He laps at it as if he was trying to catch milk. Harry’s abs go stiff when he tries to lean forward, craning his neck. Louis grins up at him, biting down on his nipple. Harry’s hips are moving in circles on top of Louis’ groin. With two harsh slaps against Harry’s bum he says, “fuck yerself baby.” Louis sits back again to watch Harry strain his muscles to fuck himself on Louis’ dick. Harry throws his head back, and Louis stares down at his neck, while he starts meeting his hips with his own thrusts. “Come again for me.” Harry moans against his own outstretched arm, while his cock pulsates on his stomach struggling to leave a second load on his stomach. Watching Harry Louis can’t help himself but finally come into his condom. 

As quickly as possible he releases Harry from the bounds around his hand. Harry just slackens and his breathing is already slower. “Now who’s tired?” Louis chuckles. 

“I’m-mh… so good.” Harry mumbles, Louis watches his stomach quiver. He lays his hand over it and watches Harry’s head fall to the side. A loud snore runs through him. Louis giggles and watches Harry fall into sleep out of exhaustion. Louis gets up and puts some trackies, before he rushes to the bathroom. He’s just washing off his tummy when the door opens. 

“Oh sorry.” Mark apologises.

“It’s fine.” Louis mumbles. He looks up to meet his father's gaze. Mark’s eyes are trained on the wet cloth in his hands. “Just cleaning up for bed.” Louis lies. Mark nods, though he seems to know exactly what they are doing. Louis suppresses the way he wants to blush, succeeding somewhat. “I’ll be out of yer way.” Louis says and steps around him.

“Ye… eh… did good today on the pitch. Ye’re a good captain.” Mark says. “Rallied yer troops in the right moment.” 

“Thanks.” Louis says and sees the blush form over his chest. “I… well… thank ye for comin’ t’ it.” 

“I heard what ye said last time.” He carefully brushes Louis across the forehead. Despite himself Louis closes his eyes to enjoy the motion. _I love ye dad, tha’s wha’ I said._ It never felt more important to have said it. _Thank you, Harry._

“It’s all _him,_ ” Louis confesses quietly. “He… he makes me feel. And talk about it.” 

“Good,” Mark says. His hand drops away from Louis’ face. “Then ye are a long way further than me. I don’t think I was the best example for talkin’ about feelin’s.” 

“I knaw.” Louis smiles, “ye’re shit at it.” Mark grins and pokes him into his cheek. 

“Cheeky shit.” He mumbles and turns around to the sink. Louis quickly darts back into his room, still bubbly and warm from talking to his father. Harry is already having a conversation about mermaids in toilets as it appears. Louis chuckles when he presses his nose into the curls. 

💚🍑💙

The week leading up to Harry’s gallery opening he gets picked up from school by his dad almost every day. He drives him to Manchester to see the venue once more, to bring the pictures to the venue and talk to some partners. Louis barely gets to see him. It doesn’t help that he’s still trying to figure out what to get him as a present. “You have to give him something like a push present.” Niall had said.

“A push present?” 

“Yeah when a woman successfully gives birth, it is tradition for the father to get her a push present.” Niall said.

“Harry and Louis didn’t fuck the pictures into existence.” Liam argues.

“Tha’ ye know of.” Louis says and thinks about the pictures Harry took of Louis sucking his cock. Liam gasps and turns around to look at him. 

“What does that mean?” Niall laughs when she stares at him. “Did you make home movies or something?” 

“Forget about it.” Louis chuckles. He starts typing away at his phone asking Oli for help. The two of them, Harry and Oli, had somehow created a strong bond over their trip, so it couldn’t hurt to ask him. Instagram doesn’t help him, not even when he grabs Harry’s phone to look through his saved-for-later page.

The weekend the opening takes place, Harry drives to Manchester after college on Friday. Louis still has footie practice. It was his mother who drove him and Dan to the event itself. Louis was a nervous wreck, wiggling his legs up and down. They were a tiny bit late, because his mother took damn long to prepare her make-up. He blames Lottie who had used a new technique on her.

The guilt is eating him up. He wanted to be there for Harry, but the footie team had insisted on some bonding the night before. Harry had been disappointed, but understood Louis had to keep up appearances. Louis might also have been a bit nervous about staying at Harry’s dad’s place for the first time, which meant he wasn’t at all against team bonding. Besides, Ashton had been quite nice to him for the first time ever.

“Here we are,” Jay says. Louis looks up from where he was typing on his phone. Harry hadn’t answered his latest messages. Hopefully, he was busy entertaining a crowd. His mother had parked the car in a small narrow cobbled street. The brick houses reached about five stories high into the sky. Three large windows, exuded bright light, spreading over the pedestrian path. The gallery looks huge to Louis, and he can already see a large crowd within it. He wordlessly gets out of the car and sends a text to Oli and Stan that he arrived. 

Dan opens the door for Jay and helps her out of the car, before they join Louis to get to the entrance. Louis’ eyes scan the crowd from the outside to see the mop of curls he is yearning for. He has to stop short when he catches sight of him. The lean muscular body is stuck in a pair of red sparkling tight pants, which he matched with a black sheer blouse he didn’t button up very far. His curls were held back with a simple black headband, one stray curl fell over his face, and Harry nervously flipped it back. 

“Oi, Oi, Tommo!” A familiar red head comes into view, closely followed by Stan. They give each other bro-hugs. “Here,” Oli hands over a small box which fits into Louis’ small hand. 

“Cheers.” Louis smiles and tries to wiggle it into his tight pants. 

“What is that?” Jay asks, trying to catch a better look at him. 

“Nothin’.” Louis quickly says, his face is heating up. “Let’s go inside.” 

“What ever it is, it’s pretty obvious in your pants, son.” Dan says, staring at Louis’ crotch. It’s a little intimidating. Louis wiggles the box out again and pushes it into his jacket. 

“Happy now?” He turns on the spot and pushes the door open. Warm air flushes against him, and a waiter immediately comes over to offer each of them a flute of champagne.

There’s loud chatter in the air, and Louis lets the wave of anticipation rush over him. Slowly Oli, Stan and Louis make their way through the gallery. Harry’s photography is hanging from the ceiling on wires or hidden in a vitrine. Most pictures are of things he knows, but they are taken at such an angle he needs a few minutes to understand what he sees. Louis stops short when he recognises the person depicted in one of them. It’s his mother in a rocking chair, her hair covers most of her face while she cradles the new set of twins in her stomach. The light from the window shines on her like a halo. 

“I try to find the most unusual angle to show the true beauty of the smallest things.“ A slow deep drawl says. Louis turns around to him. His breath catches in his throat. He feels like his eyes see Harry for the first time. _And, God, does he look good_.

“You look stunnin’.” Louis whispers.

“Thank you.” Harry says blushing. Louis gives him half a hug, aware of all the people in the room. Some of them are curiously looking over to them. He tries to tell himself they are trying to catch a look at the artist, rather than Louis. But the uneasiness in his stomach does not deflate. 

“When did ye even ‘ave time t’ do this?” Louis asks pointing to the picture.

“You like to sleep in. I don’t. I go for a run most days, and I saw Jay in the morning one day. I couldn’t resist.” Harry says, his eyebrows scrunch together to create a crease. “Do you…” Harry’s eyes dart around, “do you think she’ll be mad?” 

“No. God, no.” Louis chuckles. Harry’s eyes fixate back on him. “It’s beautiful.” 

“Oh good.” Harry sounds relieved.

“I thought ye only did still life.” Louis says, looking back at his mother’s smile on the photography.

“I’ve tried a lot of different things, there just something special about capturing a person in a moment of serenity. In those moments people become so filled with light.” Harry says, he’s watching Louis rather than the painting. 

Not turning around to him, he says, “ye really are somethin’ else.”

“Here ye are!” Oli jumps up to Harry, hugging him in an earnest embrace. Stan chuckles and squeezes Harry’s shoulder. “When ye told us ye were doin’ this, I didn’t think ye’d be this good.” 

“I think there is a compliment in there, so thank you.” Harry grins. 

Oli slings an arm around Louis’ neck, “did ye give it t’ him?” Louis feels his cheeks heat up and avoids Harry’s questioning look. 

“No.” Louis whispers back, “shut up!” Harry opens his mouth to say something, but he gets stopped by Jade who appears behind them with a mini sandwich. 

“There’s a guy that wants to talk to you about a picture.” Jade says, pointing behind her at a man with long red hair. 

“Oh, right. Thanks.” Harry says, he gives Louis one more burning glance before he walks off. With his long legs he’s at the other side of the room in seconds. 

“Ye’re here.” Louis smiles and hugs Jade.

“Yeah, Saturday date with Perrie.” She points to the other side of the room where Perrie is arguing with Zayn. 

“Figured ye’d be here.” Stan says and hugs her. “Wha’ are they fightin’ about?” 

Jade shrugs, “he’s dating someone. She’s upset. I stopped listening. Honestly, annoys me that she’s still hung up about him dating someone else.” Louis nods along, but his eyes have moved to another scene unfolding near them. Harry’s father’s shoulders are hunched forward, while he talks with aggression. He uses his hands, just like Harry, to push the words against the person he is talking to. Clive Calder is talking back, but he’s powerless against Des’ strong opinion. Eleanor’s father tries to say something, but Des seems to be flipping him off before he walks away from him.

“ ‘xcuse me.” Louis mumbles to his friends before he catches up with Des. “Wha’ happened there?” 

Des turns to him, he breathes heavily though this nose, “caught him trying to force Harry to sign a contract. I mean who the hell does he think he is? Harry’s underage, he’s not able to sign anything without a guardian…” Des just fumes and Louis’ breath hitches.

“Wait…” Louis stops him. “Wha’ kind of a contract?” 

He takes a few deep breaths, again like Harry, before he fixes his green eyes on Louis this time his breath hitches for a totally different reason. Obviously, Anne has brown eyes, so naturally 

Harry’s green has to come from his father. It’s just weird being confronted with the same shade of green just smaller than Harry’s doe eyes. He’s not sure what feeling flips through him, but there’s a tiny knot in his heart. He almost misses Des’ reply. “…force him into a contract. Bastard. It means Harry will be forced to use his gallery and only his gallery for the next five years if he wants to present his pictures.” 

“Tha’s good for a newbie right?” Louis tries to calm him down.

“Maybe.” Harry’s father looks over to where his son is chuckling with the redhead. “I refuse to believe my son won’t make it. I think he has a talent, and anyone would be lucky to show his work. So no, Louis. I won’t let him sign the contract just because Calder is the first person to offer him one.” 

“I agree with ye.” Louis says, “I also took the liberty of sending Harry’s gallery opening flyer thingy to a few people in the surrounding area who have gallery’s of their own.” 

“You did what?” He’s also taller than Louis, not as tall as Harry but taller than Louis all the same. Which makes it difficult for Louis to ignore the stare Des levels him with.

“I knew Cow-hell… sorry Cowell and Calder are bad news, so I thought I’d try and get Haz a few options. I needed t’ try at least.” Louis says. A smile spreads on the older man’s face. 

Des places a hand on Louis’ shoulder like he did when they took off to Nevis. “Then this is the moment I accept you as my son’s special someone.” There’s a smile spreading across Louis’ face too, and he can feel his stomach tumble with giddy excitement. 

“There’s nothing scary happening here is there?” Anne asks when she steps up to them, her eyes squint when she looks at her ex-husband. 

“Nope. Bonding.” Louis grins.

“Why do I always get an answer like that?” Anne asks, Louis giggles into his sleeve, before he catches sight of Liam with a brunette. 

“I got t’.” 

“Go.” Anne smiles, “go be important.” 

“Tha’ is a weird thing to say. Just thought ye should knaw.” Louis grins before he hurries off. He flicks Liam’s ear when he reaches him, “how proud are ye of our boy?” 

Turning around Liam grins at him, “very.” 

“Hello, Louis.” The brunette ducks her head slightly. 

“Sophie!” Louis squeals out, she sits across the aisle from him in Maths class. 

“Sophia.” She corrects, _shit she’s the one Liam snogged at Halloween_.

“Date night?” Louis asks, grinning when Liam whines like a dog.

“I think so?” Sophia says sounding unsure with herself. 

Louis chuckles, “great t’ see this one datin’ again.” Louis claps Liam on his back. God, he loves how Liam looks right now. He’s incorporating the word _awkward_. What Louis really wanted to say was how happy he is Liam is exploring his options, not just hanging on Zayn’s back. 

“I’m certainly happy it’s me.” Sophia grins. 

“Couldn’t ‘ave picked a better one.” Louis winks at her. She giggles. 

“Bye, guys. My Uber is here, so I’ll see you on Monday at college.” Zayn steps up to them, he nods towards Louis. 

“Too much Perrie drama for ye?” Louis asks. Zayn simply shrugs and gives Liam a bright smile. He pushes his phone into Louis’ hand, so he can get into his leather jacket. The screen lights up, and Louis really didn’t want to look down and read it, but he does.

G ❗️ G 💋

Waitin over here

i want u all 2 myself

Louis still stares down at the phone. A lump is forming in his throat when he looks up to see Liam shyly smile at Zayn. “See you around?” 

“Yeah sure.” Liam grins. 

“Who is Gg?” Louis asks. Zayn who was already two steps away from them, looks over his shoulder. 

“Mind your own business, Tomlinson.” Zayn says before he walks off. 

“What do you mean? Gigi?” Liam asks, and Louis already hates how much pain is cast in his eyes.

“His new beau.” Perrie interjects, her hand entangled with Jade. 

“Don’t you mean Belle?” Sophia asks, “it’s the female version.” Louis chuckles. 

“She’s his new date, I thought you knew this! Haven’t you been hanging out with him?” Perrie asks. Liam shakes his head. Louis feels bad for bringing it up in the first place. “Apparently she’s a model. I’ll admit that shit hurt a lill bit.” Perrie says, as if she is the only one hurt by these news. Louis rubs Liam’s back in a manner the girls won’t see. “But fuck that boy! I’m over it.” Perrie says sternly. Louis is sure he’s not the only one who hears the falter in her voice. Jade rolls her eyes next to her. 

“I’m fine.” Liam whispers to Louis, before he strides towards the bathroom without a second word. 

“Lya-um!” Louis says and runs after him. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything.” 

“Did you know?” Liam asks.

“No of course not. I saw the text just a minute ago.”

“What text?” Liam sounds hurt.

“The one she just sent him. Something about wanting him to come over. I’m sorry.” Louis says.

“Yeah, thanks.” Liam sniffles. “I’m going to the bathroom, please don’t follow me. I have to… I don’t know… get myself together.” Louis nods around the lump of his throat. He’s debating if he should go after him nonetheless, but then he sees someone who looks like someone he hates walk into the other room, Louis hadn’t had the chance to walk to.

There is a washing line hung across the room with four sheets hanging over it. Six portraits are projected onto it with a glimmering golden light from a beamer. He recognises Harry’s mother and sister, Barbara and the yank, Danielle. He’s a bit jealous how beautiful the dark hair frames her face and a confident alluring smile spreads her face.

“Have you found yourself yet?” A girl asks him. Louis surprised to see it is Barbara, who is watching him with a faint smile. 

“Is Niall here too?” Louis asks.

“Of course, what did you think?” She says with sarcasm. “Niall’s his best friend.” 

“Why are ye so pissed at me?” Louis asks. 

“Because I still remember the many times Harry lay on the floor crying for hours because of what you said or did to him.” Barbara says, one eye hidden in her new fringe.

“Yeah I remember those too. But I’ve changed, Barbs. Ye should give me credit for some of it.”Louis defends himself. Barbara watches him for a long moment, then a tiny smile spreads across her lips. Louis releases a hot breath, “wha’ did ye mean with did I find me yet?” Louis asks, realising what she had said. Barbara rolls her eyes and points toward the portraits. 

“You should look on the other side.” Louis walks along the wall to get to the other side. He’s staring at his own image. The portrait is hung in the middle of them all. He’s wearing mascara, and Louis has to agree with Harry it did make his eyes pop. He remembers being drunk on sex and love, how he cocked an eyebrow when Harry mentioned his knickers for the first time. Louis’ eyes scream something along the lines of ‘I dare ye’.

“I barely recognise ye love.” Jay says, her hand grabs his shoulder.

“I look… sappy.” Louis mumbles, “and extremely turned on.” Jay laughs, but instantly coos as well. She brushes his fringe, and Louis moans in annoyance, “not a baby mum.”

Anne steps up to them, there are tears in her eyes, “Harry just sold his first photograph.” 

“Oh my God, that’s wonderful news Anne. Congratulations, ye got an artist in yer family.” Jay squeals and hugs her old friend. Louis sees Nick stare at Louis’ picture as well. There’s something like envy distorting his features, but when their eyes meet Louis knows it’s not about the envy of Harry. It’s about having someone who loves you and sees you the way you are. Nick is jealous of their relationship, not about the people involved. Louis feels himself go lax, he nods to Nick who gives him a small smile.

“Oh I could burst I’m so proud.” Anne says, actually brushing a tear away from her eye. Louis watches his mother hug her tighter, well as tight as it is possible with her belly, and Louis tries to stray away again, but bumps into someone with his back. 

“Shit, sorry.” Louis says, turning around to him. 

“I hope you haven’t been swearing at all my guests.” Harry says, a bright smile on his lips. Louis’ eyes look down at his arm, where Harry’s hand holds on to him. His hand falls off him too fast, and Louis grabs his hand before he can think about it. 

“Heard ye sold yer first photography.” Louis says. He squeezes Harry’s hand, “so proud of ye, Hazza.” 

“Cheers.” Harry smiles, his eyes find Louis’ lips and bites his own. Their faces are inching close to each other. _Too close_ , Louis realises when he feels Harry’s breath on his face. He steps back a bit, Harry’s half-lidded eyes snap back open. “Might…ergh.” Harry clears his throat, “might sell another one. Dan wants to buy the picture of your mother. But I feel like he’s family, so might just gift it to him.” 

“Not surprised,” Louis says. “It’s a great one.” Harry smiles again, a new blush forming around his nose. “So… ahem…” he clears his own throat too. “I actually got ye somethin’.”

“Yeah?” Harry asks. He looks giddy now, and Louis grins when he sees him tuck his curls back behind his ear. 

“Like… like a push present.” Louis feels his nerves going away with him again. Harry giggles at that.

“I didn’t really push them out,” Harry laughs, his nose scrunches up and Louis really wants to bob his nose, so he does.

“Tha’s debatable.” Louis grins, and starts rummaging through his jacket for the tiny box Oli gave him earlier. 

“I really like surprises.” Harry says and shifts on his feet. Louis smiles at him, the gallery is clearing slowly. A lot of people are leaving, but to him the air feels tenser. Louis can feel his heart quiver behind his ribcage, _it’s not like I’m bloody proposing. Get a grip, man!_ Louis scolds himself. He plays with the black box in his hand, and Harry’s eyes fixate on the tiny thing. “Oh my God, you’re not…”

“No,” Louis smiles. “I’m not proposin’.” Harry’s face falls for a millisecond. “But it is… well, a ring. I made ye a promise at New Years. I made ye a lifelong promise.” He grabs Harry’s hand and shifts, so he is hiding Harry’s body from view. With a bit of difficulty, he gets the ring out of the box. It’s a silver ring with two narrow engraved lines at its sides. The letters P-E-A-C-E are engraved as well. With his free hand he grabs Harry’s left hand, he places the ring at Harry’s middle finger, “I promise t’ make ye happy for the rest of yer life. I promise t’ make ye laugh when ye are sad. I promise t’ love ye when ye feel horny.” Harry giggles, his hand shakes slightly in his own hand. “I’m promising ye tha’ I will stay when it gets hard. This is a promise,” Slowly, he slides the ring back over Harry’s middle finger until it is properly seated at the junction to his hand, “for the future of us. Me and You till the end.” Louis, who had been staring at Harry’s mint pastel coloured fingernail, looks up to see a tear slip over Harry’s cheek. 

“I… I love you, Lou.” Harry says. “Boy do I wish I could kiss you senseless right now.” Louis chuckles. 

“Do ye accept? The promise?” Louis asks, while he turns the ring on his finger.

“Yes.” Harry grins. Louis gives Harry a hug and dugs his face into the curls brushing his shoulders. Harry gives him a sneaky kiss to the ear, before they separate again. “Where’d you find this?” 

“Oli found it in a shop in London after I told him I wanted to give ye a promise ring.” Louis says, scratching his neck.

“I got a promise ring.” Harry grins brightly. “I always wanted one.”

“Honey, we have to go home now.” Jay pats Louis on his shoulder. 

“Oh right.” Louis mumbles. 

“I got a promise ring.” Harry boasts to Louis’ mother. The smaller boy wiggles on the spot, when he feels his mother’s eyes burn a hole into his side. 

“So that’s what that was.” Jay grins. “Anne,” she calls over her friend. “We are practically family.” She whisper-shouts to her oldest friend. 

“Mum!” Louis whines, embarrassment rakes through his body. And because everyone is staring at him, he clarifies, “it’s a promise ring not an engagement ring.” 

“Got it.” Jay says, but winks at Anne who is cuddling Harry into her side. 

“Baby, we really need to head home.” Dan jumps in. Louis makes a show of shivering and pretend puking.

“Baby… ye call me mum baby? Arg gross!” Louis complains.

“You are such a child.” Dan complains, and leans forward to plaster a loud kiss on Jay’s lips. She’s giggling, so Louis doesn’t comment. 

“I’ll walk you out.” Harry says. As they walk to the car, their hands brushing against each other. 

They halt in front of the car. Harry grabs one of Louis’ hands. Nervously Louis looks around, he can see a few silhouettes running around, he thinks some of them are actually their own age, but he’s to dizzy in his mind to care. Dizzy from wanting to kiss Harry.“By the way there was this guy, He wants to showcase my pictures next year and write me a recommendation letter if I need it for uni.” 

“That’s amazing.” Louis smiles up at the curly-haired boy.

“He said he came because of you.” Harry cocks his head to the side with a small smile dancing on the corner of his mouth. 

“Might ‘ave invited some people. I didn’t want ye gettin’ stuck with Calder and Cow-hell. I’m sorry tha’ I overstepped, I just really wanted t’ protect ye.” Louis says, hoping to bring across the honesty in his words.

“Thank you.” Harry says. “I mean I was pissed when you accused them in my bedroom, but thank you. My dad was really pissed about their contract.” 

“You’re welcome.” Louis says. The engine of the car comes to life behind them. 

“Can you kiss me.” Harry asks. Louis looks around again. Closing the distance between them with a tiny step, Louis pushes up to his tip toes to give him a kiss to the lips. Harry meets him tilting his head downward. With a wet smack their lips separate again. 

“See ye tomorrow?” Louis asks a little breathless.

“You bet your bum I will.” Harry giggles. 

Louis lets go of his hand and rounds the car, “ye keep objectifying me Harold.” He makes a tsk sound and jumps into the backseat. He waves at Harry, who rushes back inside after Niall calls him for something Louis doesn’t hear.

He watches the boy’s glittery red pants twinkle in the dark air. His eyes scan his beautiful bum, a smile breaks out over his face. “Ready?” Dan asks from the driver’s seat.

“Yeah,” Louis smiles letting his back recline against the seat. This feeling right now, this is a good feeling. This was a perfect night. He’s still smiling when he looks up to see the shadow detaching from a wall. As Dan pulls out of the parking spot, the silver light from the car circles the corner of the gallery. Louis’ heart stops. His breath catches in his throat. 

With his arms crossed over his chest, a menacing smile on his lips and a scrutinising stare Ashtonlooks at Louis. Everything about him screams _I know._ He looks cocky, like he figured out how to be on top of the world again.

_Well shit!_ Louis thinks. _I’m about t’ get outed._ "Fuck!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He will be fine *panicks in the corner* nah he'll be fine *starts sweating*
> 
> If you enjoyed so far please click the kudos button. I love hearing all your thoughts, so please leave me comments 😇😚
> 
> We are slowly coming to an end with this fic, I will probably upload 1 (maybe two if I can't manage to keep myself short) chapter and one epilogue.
> 
> Some canon/explanatory notes…  
> 1\. I have never been there, but the ski-resort they go to is inspired by Nevis Range (If you want to check it out for reference here's a link: https://www.nevisrange.co.uk/activities/ski-board/)  
> 2\. Their hotel room order is almost identically to the carpool order  
> 3\. Of course Ted Tomlinson (the dog) was the fake account Louis used during the X Factor days to shower Harry (Dusty Styles) with affection.   
> 4\. Perrie shaded Zayn when she revealed the originally lyric of ‘shout out to my ex’ “heard he been fucking some model chick, yeah that shit hurt I’ll admit, but fuck that boy I’m over it.” (https://ohnotheydidnt.livejournal.com/104093681.html)  
> 5\. I know the Zayn/Louis feud is getting a bit tiring, but we all know Louis is stubborn :)  
> 6\. Some pictures from the banner were posted and created by: Larryspineapples ; since-he-was-eighteen


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